Donkey Kong Country (1997–2000): Season 2, Episode 9 - Follow That Coconut - full transcript

♪ Ooh ♪ Ah ♪ Ooh-ah
♪ Donkey Kong ♪ Hey-oh

♪ Look out down
below ♪ Here he comes

♪ Banana slamma

♪ Donkey Kong ♪

♪ Ooh ♪ Ah ♪ Ooh-ah, Donkey Kong

♪ Ooh ♪ Ah ♪ Ooh-ah,
Donkey Kong ♪ Hey-oh

♪ Look out down
below ♪ Here he comes

♪ Banana slamma ♪
Kongo Bongo"s hero ♪

♪ Hey-oh ♪ Donkey Kong,
let"s go ♪

♪ Let"s go ♪

♪ Here he comes ♪ Banana slamma



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Only one day left till the

annual soccer game
against the lizards.

Are you nervous, big buddy?

Why should I be nervous?

Ooh, because you"re our star

player and you haven"t even

practiced yet, and because if we

lose against the lizards, it"ll

be the first time ever.

And that will be worse than

just about anything.

Relax, little buddy.

There"s nothing to
be nervous about.



We can practice now with this.

Stay still...

Don"t give away our position.

Yes,
sir... >> Banana slamma... Oof!

Ouch... Now I"m nervous.

Ooh.

It looked really good,
till the end.

Maybe you should
try your other foot.

Banana slamma!

Jeepin" jungle bugs!

You got it!

The big foot kick is definitely

the play of the day!

Look at that coconut go!

Not too shabby!

Hey... Mm... >> Soccer spies!

Let"s get 'em!

Yeah!

Let"s get 'em!

Our position"s no longer secure!

Retreat!

You"re just lucky he didn't

practice his big foot
kick on your tails!

You call that a soccer kick,
mister?

My grandmother could kick better

than that,
and she"s got webbed feet!

How many times have I told

you not to play indoors?

Now, give me that ball!

Okay.

Oof!

It can"t be... I
don"t believe it!

My years of malignant

malfeasance have paid off!

And you two little

whippersnappers playing a

little trick on Uncle K. Rool,
were we?

Pretending this precious little

beauty was a soccer ball.

[Cautious laughter]

Yeah... >> Tell me,
Klump, however did

you get your hands on it?

I want to hear all about it!

Spare me no diabolical detail!

All right, well, it was a

suicide mission.

Chances were none of us would

come back alive.

Danger was at every turn.

Suddenly, there was the coconut.

I zigged!

I zagged!

I serpentined.

I was pinned under enemy fire,
and then...

I found it on the beach.

Yes, yes, whatever.

All I care is...

Ooh, I have you now, my beauty!

I have the Crystal Coconut!

You do?

Where"d you get it at?

You carry your jokes too far!

Now, with this Crystal

Coconut in my possession, I

shall divine the
mysteries of the universe.

The Coconut will reveal all!

Hm?

No glowing?

No humming?

No nothing?

Maybe it"s not plugged in.

Uh, maybe it"s, uh...

just a big old coconut, sir.

This is not the Crystal Coconut?

[Laughing]

You thought... [Laughing]

I should"ve known better!

You two leather lunk-heads

couldn"t mastermind your way out

of bed, let alone figure out a

way to steal the Crystal Coconut

on your own.

Klump, this is your doing!

Uh, permission to ask why, sir?

Because you"re so dense, you

can"t tell one
coconut from another.

But... but... you were fooled

too, your easily confused-ness.

Fooled?

I"m never fooled.

Besides,
that"s got nothing to do with it.

Wait a minute.

If I, King K. Rool, the

smartest, craftiest creature on

Kongo Bongo, was, um, shall we

say, misled by this Crystal

Coconut wannabe,
who else would be?

You can count on Krusha and me,
sir.

Fooling you two is not

exactly a world class challenge.

I wonder what those airheaded

apes would make of this

reasonable facsimile.

Yes...

You don"t realize just how

lucky you are to have me as your

soccer coach.

At the first Apes-Lizards soccer

game, I coached Eddie the Yeti

and Bluster and came up with a

play that won the game.

It"s complicated,
but it's a doozy.

[Grumbling]

Can"t you sit still for half a

second without jumping and

jittering all over the place?

Sorry, but you have to admit,

it is kind of boring.

Boring?

You call this boring?

This is... This is...

I have no idea what this is.

Ooh!

You two numbskulls made me

forget the winning play, with

all your fooling around!

I"ll go see if Bluster
remembers the play.

He was a student of the game,

not like some monkeys
I could mention.

Cranky is out of the way.

Let"s initiate
Operation Switcheroo.

[Machinery running loudly]

I said,
"Do you remember winning play?"

What on Earth
are you talking about?

What windy day?

Winning play!

Pay?

Surely you don"t expect any pay

without actually working.

Only my job allows for that.

[Machinery stops]

Soccer!

Sock her?

Cranky,
whatever are you talking about?

I would never
strike an employee.

They could sue me.

And besides, I would never harm

a hair on Candy"s head.

Ew!

Too bad the
feeling ain"t mutual.

Never mind.

I"ll figure out the play myself.

Ready?

Hey, monkeys!

I thought I smelled swamp gas.

Look what I got.

Am I crazy, or is that the

Crystal Coconut?

That a two part question, and

affirmative on both parts.

Got it, Diddy.

Open her up, little buddy.

I don"t know how those crocs

got their slimy claws on the

Crystal Coconut, but...

Leaping lollipops!

The Coconut"s already here!

Hey, what"s going on?

I don"t get it!

[Laughing]

Hey!

Thanks, appreciate it!

Gimme" that coconut!

I got it, I got it!

I don"t got it.

I got it!

BOTH: Oof!

Grab the Coconut, you twit!

BOTH: Okay.

Not you.

I meant my twit.

BOTH: I got it!

Have a nice trip!

I got it!

I... Ooh!

I got one.

And I got one.

Hey... >> Oh, no!

We"re back where we started!

We"ve got it, Krusha.

That would mean I don"t,

which means I"ll take that,

and you can have this.

I remembered the winning play!

[Laughing]

Thanks for nothing!

You made me forget whatever it

was I remembered!

What"s the matter with you,
Donkey Kong?

Why"d you let those two ignorant

iguanas in here?

You should be thanking me,

not hollering at me.

That"s right!

DK, my best buddy and future

ruler of Kongo Bongo, just

recued the Crystal Coconut.

Yet again.

He just made me forget my

winning soccer play all over

again is what he did.

Hey, maybe the Crystal

Coconut can help you remember.

You know, that"s the first

intelligent thing
you"ve said in ages.

DK: Thank you.

K. ROOL: Looks
like the Crystal Coconut.

Smells like the Crystal Coconut.

Feels like the Crystal Coconut.

♪ Could it be?

♪ I have what I"ve wanted ♪

♪ Just a minute

♪ I want to savour this moment

♪ The power that I now possess

♪ Suits me well ♪ I must confess

♪ It"s good to be
a glorious me ♪

♪ Do you know what
this will mean to me? ♪

♪ I"m the power
over all that I see ♪

♪ Kneel before me
as I reign supreme ♪

♪ Do you know what this means?

What don"t you
just rip my heart out?

♪ Do you know what this means?

♪ The Crystal Coconut

in the hands of that fiend ♪

♪ Our future"s in doubt ♪

♪ You dimwitted lout!

This is the worst thing that

could ever have happened!

This could cost us everything!

We"re doomed!

You boneheaded baboon!

Now go!

Go out and get the coconut back!

And don"t come
back until you get it!

No problem!

We"ll get the real
one back from K. Rool.

We can be there in no time.

We can be there
less than no time.

If speed"s what you want, then

speed"s what you'll get!

Fast is the slowest we go!

Will you shut your pie-hole

and get going already?

And get this worthless piece of

junk out of my sight!

Banana slamma!

Woo-hoo!

I"ve gotta admit, your big foot

kick is coming along nicely.

Hey, DK, you"re getting good!

Pass it over here!

You"re the man!

Look at those little feet go!

That"s our secret weapon.

With my big feet, and your

little ones,
we can win any soccer game.

Big feet for a kick, little

feet for a pass!

Wait a minute!

I"m waiting!

I"m waiting!

We can use the same moves to

get the Crystal Coconut back!

Come on, I"ve got an idea!

Oh, this is gonna be so great!

Krusha...

Wanna come out and play soccer?

DK: Oh, Krusha, wanna play?

Can I got out to play?

[Mumbling]

Yeah,
as long as it"s in traffic.

Don"t forget to
bring your own ball!

Where"s my ball?

Oh, there it is.

Is this the one you meant?

Good boy, Krusha!

Let"s get down
to some serious fun.

Krusha, you start.

Let"s get that ball in play.

Hey, that"s my move!

Try it again, Krusha!

Pass it over here!

Come on, put some foot into it!

DK: You can do it >> Ow!

Huh?

What?

Close enough.

Heads up, Diddy!

I did it!

I mean, I got it!

I mean, here, Krusha!

You pulled a switch!

I saw that!

That wasn"t supposed to happen!

Whoa!

Diddy, over here!

Nobody"s playing with me!

I did it!

What?

Oh, you did it all right.

You just passed him
the Crystal Coconut.

Passing"s good, right?

Wait a sec!

I thought Diddy gave me the real

Crystal Coconut!

Uh-oh!

Hey, Diddy,
we have the wrong one.

Take this one!

[Laughing]

[Fighting sounds]

I got it!

Are you sure
this is the real one?

I don"t know,
looks real to me...

Sort of.

You don"t know?

DK, we can"t have the wrong one.

We have to have the right one.

Tell me we don"t
have the wrong one.

I think we have the wrong one.

What?

Stay calm,
we can"t let them know.

I"ve got an idea.

I give up, this is the real

Crystal Coconut.

You win.

I thought you"d see it my way.

Here, chew on this.

[Laughing]

The old switcheroo!

Let"s get out of here.

DK: Well,
congratulate us Cranky.

Here she is, safe and sound.

Cranky?

Yoo-hoo, Cranky, where are you?

Look,
the Crystal Coconut is back!

Kongo Bongo is safe, and if that

doesn"t call for a banana, I

don"t know what does.

DK, over here.

Check this out.

Cranky left us a note.

Hm, I wonder why Cranky

didn"t send his hologram.

"I didn" t send my hologram,

because you two chuckle-heads

lost my Crystal Coconut."

"I" ve gone to the White

Mountains to ask Eddie the Yeti

about the winning soccer play.

If, by any miracle, you"ve

retrieved the Crystal Coconut,

bring it here to me."

Gee, I wonder why he wants us

to do that.

"Stop asking questions and

just do it, you numbskull!"

Sorry, it"s what's written here.

That"s okay, little buddy.

Come on, Coconut,
it"s time to chill out.

To the White Mountains!

So, Eddie, do you remember

when I taught you that great

play for the Soccer Game.

Who you?

Me?

I"m Cranky!

Cranky, your coach!

Ah, Cranky!

I remember!

Good.

So you remember when I taught

you and Bluster...
Who Bluster?

The rich obnoxious ape with a

moustache and a mumsy.

I remember!

So that play I taught you...

Do you remember?

[Giggling]

Who am I kidding?

Old switcheroo!

That"s it!

The old switcheroo!

You remembered!

No remember.

Keep diary!

[Laughing]

[Snoring]

You"re all mine...

Oh, I could kiss you...

What are you doing here?

Just guarding your prize,

your slobbery smoochi-ness.

It wasn"t a dream!

You"re really mine!

All mine!

I love you... And I
know you love me.

So as a token of your affection,

why don"t you just grant me a

small request?

I said, "Grant me a request!"

Nothing?

No glowing?

No humming?

No magic?

Nothing?

How dare you defy K. Rool, your

lord and master!

Klump!

What do you know about this?

Whoops.

"Whoops"?

What kind of
explanation is "whoops"?

Well, not a very good one,

your king-of-the-castle-ness.

This is not my Crystal Coconut!

Uh, well,
that would be correct, sir.

However, confidence is high that

we can relocate said coconut,

and, um,
reassign it to you, sir...

Where is my coconut?

The apes have it, sir.

You everglades escapees...

You cretinous crustaceans!

If you want anything done right

around here, you"ve got to see

to it yourself.

I will switch the coconuts

myself, and you will observe.

Now, let"s go!

Move it!

Let"s go!

Move it!

Uh, huh?

Why are we going through the

mountains,
your cold-blooded-ness?

Those banana brain baboons

won"t expect to see us advancing

from the mountains.

Now, quick!

My footsies are getting cold.

DK, slow down!

There"s no one chasing us!

And I want to keep it that way!

[All shouting]

Get him!

♪ Looky here, looky here

♪ Look what I"ve got ♪

♪ Don"t think I won't let ♪

♪ Little Diddy drop

♪ Hold it now, hold it now

♪ Hold it, hold it right there

♪ You wouldn"t drop ♪

♪ Couldn"t drop ♪

♪ You wouldn"t dare ♪

♪ I"m a reasonable raving

derange-able despot ♪

♪ I"ll tell you what ♪

♪ We"ll trade like
a stock exchange ♪

♪ Wheel and deal
♪ How"s that feel? ♪

♪ It"s a steal ♪

♪ Diddy for the coconut

♪ The coconut for Diddy

♪ Don"t do it, don't do it ♪

♪ He"s bluffing I hope ♪

♪ I guarantee, as you see

♪ There"s no pity for Diddy ♪

♪ No bluffin", no bluffin' ♪

♪ Wait a sec, what the heck

♪ Let us make a trade

♪ Give me my little buddy and

we"ll stop this escapade ♪

♪ Diddy for the coconut

♪ The coconut for Diddy

♪ I"m going to count to ten

and it"s up to you then ♪

♪ One ♪ One,
one ♪ This is fun ♪ DK beware

♪ Take care, it"s a snare ♪

♪ He"s just guffin' ♪

♪ He be bluffin" ♪

♪ It"s K. Rool who'll
stop at nothing ♪

♪ Two, and you, it"s a cue ♪

♪ What you gonna do?

♪ Gotta think what to do

♪ Or my little buddy"s through ♪

♪ Give up the coconut

or else he"s gonna drop you ♪

♪ How touching, I may cry

♪ Don"t you see? ♪

♪ Do I hear three?

♪ Three,
three ♪ Let him drop him

then we"ll see ♪

♪ Three,
three ♪ Make him Diddy fricassee

♪ Hey big buddy ♪ Did you see,
did you see?

♪ You can save the coconut

♪ The coconut can save me ♪ Four

♪ Wait, there"s more ♪

♪ Got a plan, got a trick

♪ You can use your big foot

♪ Hit "em with
the big foot kick ♪

♪ What?

♪ Five ♪ That"s no jive ♪

♪ Take a dive ♪ Six and seven

♪ Time to learn a lesson

♪ Come on, big buddy

♪ Use your big foot kick

♪ I get it, I get it

♪ Little buddy that"s slick ♪

♪ But I got two coconuts

so which one do I pick? ♪

♪ Eight ♪ Wait,
I have to concentrate

♪ Nine ♪ Can"t decide,
do or die ♪

♪ Running out of time ♪ Ten

♪ Time to end this drama

♪ Here goes nothing
♪ Banana slamma!

[Diddy yelling]

K. ROOL: He broke my coconut!

Uh-oh... [Yelling]

KLUMP: Get me out of here!

Diddy!

Diddy, Diddy, please be there!

Please be there!

Nice kick, big buddy!

[Chuckling]

Did you think so?

I was worried that I didn"t get

enough leg in it, but then I...

Uh, DK, maybe you could

rescue me and then we"ll do the

colour commentary?

Oh, sorry, little buddy!

My best little buddy.

You"re all right.

I"m fine.

No sweat.

I wasn"t worried for a second.

Hey, look!

Huh?

I wonder if it"s the real

Crystal Coconut or the fake?

You mean you didn"t know

which Coconut you were kicking?

I had no idea.

All I knew was I
had to save you.

Wow!

You"d risk giving the Crystal

Coconut to the
enemy just for me?

Well, you are my best buddy.

What if this isn"t the

real Crystal Coconut?

Then, as my best buddy,

you"ll just have to hide me from

Cranky for the rest of my life.

Time to find out.

[Gasping]

It"s the Crystal Coconut!

You did it, DK!

You did it!

[Laughing]

I guess it was just cold!

Look, here comes Cranky!

We did it, Cranky!

We saved the Crystal Coconut!

I can see that, you big ape.

You think just because I"m old,

I can"t see?

So I guess you saw the part

where DK almost kicked away the

wrong coconut,
giving it right to...

Ahem.

Huh, you what?

Never mind.

So, did you remember your famous

soccer play?

Sure did.

The play was called
"the big switcheroo!"

Get this, we hide a fake soccer

ball on the sidelines that"s an

exact lookalike to the one in

play, and then, when nobody"s

looking, we do...

BOTH: The big switcheroo.

Been there, done that.

Have I told you
this play before?

[Sneezing]

K. ROOL: Oh, if I get

pneumonia, I"m going to boil you

two into soup.

[Sneezing]

KLUMP: Gesundheit.

KRUSHA: Your
cold-blooded-ness.