Dodo (2021–…): Season 1, Episode 3 - Forever Eleven - full transcript
(TENSE MUSIC) (PANTING)
(PANICKED)
My name is Joe Connolly.
I am a Year 7 student
at O'Malley Secondary School.
To my family, I love you all.
Well... n-not Jamie. Obviously.
If you're watching this,
I didn't make it.
Wait! No! (YELLS)
(THEME TUNE)
(NARRATOR)
Joe Connolly wakes up at 7.15am
with the knowledge that the day
ahead will be wonderful.
(UPBEAT MUSIC)
(MUM CALLS OUT)
Joe? Pancakes!
Good morning, Mum and Dad!
Good morning, Jamie!
(NARRATOR)
Today is Joe's bi--
♪ Happy birthday, dear Joe!
♪ Happy birthday to you.
Blowing out the candles,
Joe makes the same wish
as every year,
that for one day
he would be the greatest ever--
Alright, mate?
His wish spoilt by the arrival
of Jamie, Joe's older brother.
(ACTION MUSIC)
-No way! I'm going to win!
-No, you're not
Yes, I am!
No. You're not.
Aw! Can you pour me one?
(BURPS)
Born without an ounce of...
MERCY! MERCY! MERCY!
..they had just
one thing in common.
Their favourite sweets
were fried eggs.
Not that Joe ever had any
when Jamie was around.
Mum!
I've got something for you.
Mate, open your eyes.
(TINNY VERSION
OF 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY' PLAYS)
Whoa!
Oh lovely!
This way,
everyone in school will know
exactly what day it is.
(DOORBELL RINGS)
That'll be Frisbo.
-Have a nice birthday!
-(SURPRISED) Oh. Okay.
As Joe says goodbye, he has
no idea what lies ahead of him.
(JOE) See ya!
(TINNY 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY' PLAYS)
(DRAMATIC MUSIC)
(ZOMBIE MOANING) Birrrthdaay!
Birrrthdaaay!
-Ow! What are you doing?!
-Shh! Shh! You can't wear that!
> Did you hear
that birthday music?
-But it's my birthd--
-Never say that again.
You haven't heard
of Birthday Beats, have you?
Obviously...
Joe Connolly has
never heard of Birthday Beats.
On your birthday, everyone
gets to punch you in the arm.
EVERYONE?
(CREEPY MUSIC)
(ZOMBIE GROANS) Birrrth-daaay!
(ZOMBIE GROANS) Birrrth-daaay!
But...
(ZOMBIE GROANS) Birrrth-daaay!
Everyone.
But there's 1,500 kids
in school.
And they get to hit you
once for every year.
Twelve years? 1,500 kids?
That's a... a million hits!
(DRAMATIC MUSIC CONTINUES)
Yes, it is.
Now, take it off.
Try to look eleven,
and whatever you do,
don't say the B-word!
I-i-it can't really be that bad.
(GRAVELY)
Mate, it's Jeff Tang bad
(FRISBO) Jeff Tang was
the oldest kid in Year 7.
He was born on September 3rd.
His parents tried to get him
moved up a year
but the school said
he wasn't clever enough.
It was his first day
at O'Malley.
So in he walks, ready
to meet his new friends like...
Cupcakes, anyone?
They're gluten- and dairy-free.
Tang family secret.
He got birthday beats
from the entire school.
(GASPS)
And as if that wasn't
bad enough, a special guest
was visiting the school
that day
to meet the birthday boy
specifically.
-(ANGELIC MUSIC)
-(FRISBO) Jay-Q-lin.
She used to be
a pupil at O'Malley
and then became a huge popstar.
For some reason, she walked
straight up to Jeff Tang.
Like...
(FUNKY MUSIC PLAYING)
(FRISBO AS JAY-Q-LIN)
Hi Jeff Tang! Call me Jay-Q-lin.
Jeff Tang just says:
"Hi Jay-Q-lin. I'm Jeff Tang."
She tries to high five him and
he was unable to lift his arms
because they were too floppy
from all the Birthday Beats
and left his hero hanging
for all the school to see.
And then he was all...
"Nooo!"
Nobody can know.
Joe Connolly wouldn't be turning
12 today, or any other day.
It is his birthday no more.
Joe! I didn't know
it was your birthd--
Shh! Nobody can know!
-(SCARY MUSIC)
-Joe?
No! No! No! No! No!
(SCHOOL BELL RINGS)
Why is this happening to me?!
Joe knows exactly why
this is happening.
Jamie.
Sorry! Sorry-sorry!
Sorry! Sorry.
Umm... excuse ME?!
Oh no, it's heading
right for Dean Jackson!
(FAST-PACED TENSE MUSIC)
No! No! No! No!
No! No! No!
-Sorry.
-What for?
-Pile-on!
-(GASP)
(MANY VOICES JOIN IN)
Pile-on!
(GROANS AND SHRIEKS)
< I'm late for maths now.
Phew! Sorry.
But Joe isn't sorry. (BELL)
He can breathe again.
Okay, for the last 10 minutes,
grab your text books.
We'll be reading about
the Hungarian Uprising of 1956.
(UNSETTLING MUSIC)
(UNDER HIS BREATH)
Jamie.
(GULPS)
With another trap safely
negotiated,
Joe Connolly is
feeling confident that--
-They know.
-(TERRIFIED GASP)
Shh!
(UNSETTLING MUSIC)
They know.
(WHISPERING)
It's okay.
They just know it's
SOMEONE'S birthday.
They don't know it's mine.
(TEACHER)
Textbooks open on page 31.
(TINNY 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY' CHANT)
(PENCIL FALLS)
(GASPS) Oh no.
(MENACINGLY)
Happy birthday, Joe.
(DRAMATIC MUSIC)
If Joe can make it to RE,
he will be safe.
-Happy birthday, Joe!
-Shut up, Jamie!
But RE is three corridors away.
-(GIRL)Joe, is it your birthday?
-No, it's not!
-It's Jo Fitzgerald's!
-What?
(GROANING) Birrth-daay!
Nooo!
Birrth-daayyy!
(YELLING)
(ZOMBIE GROWLING)
Birrth-daaay!
The end is now imminent.
With his final breaths, Joe will
say his final farewells.
My name is Joe Connolly.
I am a year 7 student
at O'Malley Secondary School.
To my family, I love you all.
Well... not Jamie. Obviously.
If you're watching this,
I didn't make it.
Wait! No!
(TERRIFIED YELL)
Come with us.
We've got a plan.
When all else fails,
Joe Connolly can always
count on his friends.
How did you get rid of everyone?
In 'ere.
Wait a second...
This isn't RE.
Sorry, Joe.
Birrrth-daaay!
Y-y-you can't do this to me!
It has to stop.
This is the only way.
Happy birthday, Joe.
(FOOT TAPPING ECHOES
IN THE SILENCE)
I can't believe
that was over so quickly.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
-How was it?
-Alright. Arm's a bit dead.
Finally the world
is a better place.
Joe can enjoy
a happy birthday--
-Mate.
-Jamie!
(JAMIE, SOFTLY)
Mate, open your eyes.
(ANGELIC MUSIC)
Fried eggs!
-(UPBEAT MUSIC)
-See you at home, Dodo.
Hah! Happy birthday, mate.
Joe Connolly is 12 years old.
(GIRL) It's not my birthday!
I'm a Leo!
(PANICKED)
My name is Joe Connolly.
I am a Year 7 student
at O'Malley Secondary School.
To my family, I love you all.
Well... n-not Jamie. Obviously.
If you're watching this,
I didn't make it.
Wait! No! (YELLS)
(THEME TUNE)
(NARRATOR)
Joe Connolly wakes up at 7.15am
with the knowledge that the day
ahead will be wonderful.
(UPBEAT MUSIC)
(MUM CALLS OUT)
Joe? Pancakes!
Good morning, Mum and Dad!
Good morning, Jamie!
(NARRATOR)
Today is Joe's bi--
♪ Happy birthday, dear Joe!
♪ Happy birthday to you.
Blowing out the candles,
Joe makes the same wish
as every year,
that for one day
he would be the greatest ever--
Alright, mate?
His wish spoilt by the arrival
of Jamie, Joe's older brother.
(ACTION MUSIC)
-No way! I'm going to win!
-No, you're not
Yes, I am!
No. You're not.
Aw! Can you pour me one?
(BURPS)
Born without an ounce of...
MERCY! MERCY! MERCY!
..they had just
one thing in common.
Their favourite sweets
were fried eggs.
Not that Joe ever had any
when Jamie was around.
Mum!
I've got something for you.
Mate, open your eyes.
(TINNY VERSION
OF 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY' PLAYS)
Whoa!
Oh lovely!
This way,
everyone in school will know
exactly what day it is.
(DOORBELL RINGS)
That'll be Frisbo.
-Have a nice birthday!
-(SURPRISED) Oh. Okay.
As Joe says goodbye, he has
no idea what lies ahead of him.
(JOE) See ya!
(TINNY 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY' PLAYS)
(DRAMATIC MUSIC)
(ZOMBIE MOANING) Birrrthdaay!
Birrrthdaaay!
-Ow! What are you doing?!
-Shh! Shh! You can't wear that!
> Did you hear
that birthday music?
-But it's my birthd--
-Never say that again.
You haven't heard
of Birthday Beats, have you?
Obviously...
Joe Connolly has
never heard of Birthday Beats.
On your birthday, everyone
gets to punch you in the arm.
EVERYONE?
(CREEPY MUSIC)
(ZOMBIE GROANS) Birrrth-daaay!
(ZOMBIE GROANS) Birrrth-daaay!
But...
(ZOMBIE GROANS) Birrrth-daaay!
Everyone.
But there's 1,500 kids
in school.
And they get to hit you
once for every year.
Twelve years? 1,500 kids?
That's a... a million hits!
(DRAMATIC MUSIC CONTINUES)
Yes, it is.
Now, take it off.
Try to look eleven,
and whatever you do,
don't say the B-word!
I-i-it can't really be that bad.
(GRAVELY)
Mate, it's Jeff Tang bad
(FRISBO) Jeff Tang was
the oldest kid in Year 7.
He was born on September 3rd.
His parents tried to get him
moved up a year
but the school said
he wasn't clever enough.
It was his first day
at O'Malley.
So in he walks, ready
to meet his new friends like...
Cupcakes, anyone?
They're gluten- and dairy-free.
Tang family secret.
He got birthday beats
from the entire school.
(GASPS)
And as if that wasn't
bad enough, a special guest
was visiting the school
that day
to meet the birthday boy
specifically.
-(ANGELIC MUSIC)
-(FRISBO) Jay-Q-lin.
She used to be
a pupil at O'Malley
and then became a huge popstar.
For some reason, she walked
straight up to Jeff Tang.
Like...
(FUNKY MUSIC PLAYING)
(FRISBO AS JAY-Q-LIN)
Hi Jeff Tang! Call me Jay-Q-lin.
Jeff Tang just says:
"Hi Jay-Q-lin. I'm Jeff Tang."
She tries to high five him and
he was unable to lift his arms
because they were too floppy
from all the Birthday Beats
and left his hero hanging
for all the school to see.
And then he was all...
"Nooo!"
Nobody can know.
Joe Connolly wouldn't be turning
12 today, or any other day.
It is his birthday no more.
Joe! I didn't know
it was your birthd--
Shh! Nobody can know!
-(SCARY MUSIC)
-Joe?
No! No! No! No! No!
(SCHOOL BELL RINGS)
Why is this happening to me?!
Joe knows exactly why
this is happening.
Jamie.
Sorry! Sorry-sorry!
Sorry! Sorry.
Umm... excuse ME?!
Oh no, it's heading
right for Dean Jackson!
(FAST-PACED TENSE MUSIC)
No! No! No! No!
No! No! No!
-Sorry.
-What for?
-Pile-on!
-(GASP)
(MANY VOICES JOIN IN)
Pile-on!
(GROANS AND SHRIEKS)
< I'm late for maths now.
Phew! Sorry.
But Joe isn't sorry. (BELL)
He can breathe again.
Okay, for the last 10 minutes,
grab your text books.
We'll be reading about
the Hungarian Uprising of 1956.
(UNSETTLING MUSIC)
(UNDER HIS BREATH)
Jamie.
(GULPS)
With another trap safely
negotiated,
Joe Connolly is
feeling confident that--
-They know.
-(TERRIFIED GASP)
Shh!
(UNSETTLING MUSIC)
They know.
(WHISPERING)
It's okay.
They just know it's
SOMEONE'S birthday.
They don't know it's mine.
(TEACHER)
Textbooks open on page 31.
(TINNY 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY' CHANT)
(PENCIL FALLS)
(GASPS) Oh no.
(MENACINGLY)
Happy birthday, Joe.
(DRAMATIC MUSIC)
If Joe can make it to RE,
he will be safe.
-Happy birthday, Joe!
-Shut up, Jamie!
But RE is three corridors away.
-(GIRL)Joe, is it your birthday?
-No, it's not!
-It's Jo Fitzgerald's!
-What?
(GROANING) Birrth-daay!
Nooo!
Birrth-daayyy!
(YELLING)
(ZOMBIE GROWLING)
Birrth-daaay!
The end is now imminent.
With his final breaths, Joe will
say his final farewells.
My name is Joe Connolly.
I am a year 7 student
at O'Malley Secondary School.
To my family, I love you all.
Well... not Jamie. Obviously.
If you're watching this,
I didn't make it.
Wait! No!
(TERRIFIED YELL)
Come with us.
We've got a plan.
When all else fails,
Joe Connolly can always
count on his friends.
How did you get rid of everyone?
In 'ere.
Wait a second...
This isn't RE.
Sorry, Joe.
Birrrth-daaay!
Y-y-you can't do this to me!
It has to stop.
This is the only way.
Happy birthday, Joe.
(FOOT TAPPING ECHOES
IN THE SILENCE)
I can't believe
that was over so quickly.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
-How was it?
-Alright. Arm's a bit dead.
Finally the world
is a better place.
Joe can enjoy
a happy birthday--
-Mate.
-Jamie!
(JAMIE, SOFTLY)
Mate, open your eyes.
(ANGELIC MUSIC)
Fried eggs!
-(UPBEAT MUSIC)
-See you at home, Dodo.
Hah! Happy birthday, mate.
Joe Connolly is 12 years old.
(GIRL) It's not my birthday!
I'm a Leo!