Doctor Who (1963–1989): Season 15, Episode 16 - The Sun Makers: Part Four - full transcript
Attempting to start a successful revolution, the Doctor uses Pluto's Public Address System to announce successful revolution, all the while trying to determine the Collector's true species and why he, or it, seems set on taxing the life out of humans.
(DOCTOR WHO THEME)
(LOUD RUMBLING)
That noise, Hade.
Can't something be done about it?
We shan't hear her.
It's vibration in the exchanger,
Your Magnificence.
I know what it is. I don't want
my pleasure ruined by it.
Her cries will be clearly
audible, Your Honour.
What's that?
The subtleties will be lost.
The deeper notes of despair,
the final dying cadences.
The whole point of a good steaming
is the range it affords.
Marn, I... Er, no, uh...
I'll see if the discriminator
can be adjusted, Your Immensity.
Doctor, can you hear me?
I can't give you any longer.
The exchanger's going
to blow any second.
Get out, Doctor. Get out now!
What was it?
I thought I heard someone say
''Doctor'', Your Sagacity.
It wasn't the girl. There hasn't
been a peep out of her.
Precisely, Hade.
Something has gone wrong.
Order the guards to investigate.
Immediately, Your Omniscience.
Come along, Marn!
-Flow valves open.
-Main pumps in.
SYNGE: Sixty atmospheres, still rising.
Plug the auxiliaries in. Quick!
Auxiliaries in.
-She's cooling, look.
-We've made it.
Unless the air plates
have buckled, Synge.
Let's hope they haven't.
Do you think the Doctor got out in time?
If he didn't, he wouldn't have
known much about it.
We gave him his two minutes.
More than his two minutes.
-(REVERBERATING THUD)
-Listen. In the vent!
He's made it!
-Leela!
-DOCTOR: Who was making all that noise?
I was, Doctor.
I told you not to use that radio link.
We had to tell you
that your time was up, Doctor.
You told the Collector, too!
That fish-blooded sadist
had Leela's casket wired for sound.
Ah-ah, Cordo.
We've got a great deal to do yet.
-It's going well, though, Doctor.
-Is it?
The PCM is clearing from the
air faster than I expected.
It's down 1 0 points already.
All my men are out putting some fight
into the work units.
If just one District joins
the resistance, the word'll spread
-through the whole city.
-DOCTOR: Shh.
Where's the public video system
controlled from?
The Collector's palace.
Yes, he runs everything from
the computer room. Why, Doctor?
If the public video system announced
there'd been a successful rebellion,
think of the effect. Hmm?
-Everyone would believe it.
-Right.
Yes, but the palace is guarded
by his Inner Retinue.
He's guarded by his Inner Retinue,
and most of them are down there
with him. Come on, Leela, let's go.
Megro Guards!
Megro Guards coming this way!
Everybody keep calm, keep calm.
Keep quiet. You two back there.
You three over there.
Leela, behind the door.
-What do you want here?
-All right, drop your guns.
Tie them up.
Come on.
Pretty soon, Bisham,
you'll will be under siege here.
K9?
I want you to hold out
as long as possible.
-Yes, Doctor.
-We'll do it, Doctor.
Of course you will.
Now we have more weapons,
we can hold the corridor.
Good man. K9?
LEELA: K9?
-K9?
-K9?
-K9?
-K9?
-K9?
-K9?
DOCTOR: K9, where are you?
-Master.
-Ah, there you are. Listen.
I want you to give my friends all
the help they need. You understand?
I am at full offensive capability,
master.
You're a good dog. Come on, Leela.
Gentlemen, good luck.
-BISHAM: Thank you, Doctor.
-Right, Doctor.
An unprofitable operation, Hade.
Your Supernal Eminence,
I simply can't understand it.
No one has ever endured a steaming
without vocalising
in the most gratifying fashion.
A complete waste of time.
And we've lost a .04 7%% in production.
Unpaid overtime
to be introduced immediately
for all work grades. See to it!
Without fail, Monstrosity,
without fail.
What is it?
Your Excellence, sir.
Some minor disturbances.
It may not be wise to travel
in the subways
-until the trouble has been suppressed.
-What trouble?
It appears that some of the work units
are refusing to
leave their dormers, Excellency.
Refusing to leave?
I've never heard of such a thing.
THE COLLECTOR:
This situation must be normalised.
Any sustained unrest
among the workforce will adversely
affect Company profitability.
Sing adoration to our Company!
I have dispatched a division
of the Retinue, Excellency.
The account will be swiftly settled.
With interest, Commander.
They must be made to pay.
I will introduce a swingeing
output-linked penalty tax
in my next monthly budget,
Your Corpulence.
The Doctor must be behind it.
I sense the vicious doctrine
of egalitarianism, Hade.
Everyone knows your senses
are infallible, Your Promontory.
Have the two guards reported
from Main Control yet?
No, Your Omnipresence.
My underling Marn is investigating.
Not good enough, Hade. Not good enough.
I am noting your work rate.
I will instigate action myself,
Your Aggrandizement.
Instantly. Immediately.
You'll never believe this, Bisham,
but I'm really beginning
to enjoy myself.
The air's better without PCM, isn't it?
Yes, we'll never pay
breathing tax to the Company again.
Oh, we'll pay no more taxes, brother.
The Gatherer's got his
last talmar off of us.
I feel so good, like a new man!
Keep an eye on the corridor, Cordo,
or you'll be a dead new man.
All right, Mandrel. I know.
K9's got it covered.
I wonder what's happening
in the subways and dormers?
Theoretically, the dispersion rate
of the PCM should be slower down there,
but there should be something
happening by now.
If the work units turn,
the guards will really have
their hands full.
Come on, move yourselves.
Report for work at once.
-(CLAMOURING)
-Work! Work! Work! Gatherer's orders.
GOUDRY: We're on strike, brother.
Join us or get out.
Who said that? Who was it?
Me.
-Nobody works today.
-VEET: Nobody works today.
That's mutiny against the Company.
You've just earned
yourself an early death day, Citizen.
-No, no, no.
-Why not?
No, don't kill him.
He hasn't done you any harm.
-Then I shall kill him before he does.
-No.
-Get up. Come on, get up.
-Doctor,
the last one I spared got away
and warned his comrades.
That is why I was captured.
Then we'll make sure this one
doesn't get away.
Here, look at me. Look at me!
Now, listen.
It's your sleep time.
Sleep time.
You're feeling very sleepy.
Very sleepy.
It's your sleep time.
You will go to sleep
and stay asleep
until I tell you to wake up.
Until I tell you to wake up.
Come on. Come on.
-Wake up.
-How did you do that?
What, that? (SCOFFS)
It's just a knack.
You've either got it or you haven't.
-Doctor!
-What is it?
This is where the grey one,
the Collector, sat.
Hmm. What, like a spider
in the middle of a web?
Yes, yes.
I understand all this.
He has a computer feeding
and analysing the daily returns
from each Megropolis.
Suppose...
Suppose he wants to broadcast
some pleasing bit of news, hmm?
Like the imposition of a double-vision
tax on people with more than one eye?
-Well, then, he feeds it into there.
-No, he fed it into here.
He did?
I... I fear the situation is worsening,
Your Grossness.
Laxity, Hade, laxity and weakness.
You have shown them too much kindness.
A grave error of judgement.
Grinding oppression of the masses
is the only policy that pays dividends.
Your Orotundity, my Megro Guards
are outnumbered by the rabble.
If I could have two divisions
of the Inner Retinue?
The sole task of the Inner Retinue
is to protect my person.
You've mishandled the situation, Hade.
As for your ambition
to become Tax Master General,
after this, forget it!
-Your Honour.
-What is it, Marn?
I've just heard that
some of the work units
have gone to the roof of Block 40
to have a look at our sun.
Outrageous! Sacrilege!
The work units are absolutely forbidden
to see the light of the sun.
It's far too good for them.
I'll soon deal with this.
The combat situation is escalating.
Those idiots have let it get
out of hand.
It is imperative that I return
to the palace to implement
my contingency plans.
But Excellency,
there's fighting in the...
Quiet!
The Inner Retinue will march
around me in close order.
Their bodies will shield me. Now, hurry.
-Doctor, come here.
-(WHIRRING)
That should do it.
-Doctor?
-Hmm?
What is this?
What, that?
Well, it's a safe. Company vault.
-Doctor, is there...
-Shh, shh.
(WHISPERING) Is there something
behind the door?
-What was that?
-I heard nothing.
-Neither did I.
-Then why are we whispering?
I always whisper
when I'm opening safes.
-What is it?
-What are you doing?
I don't know. It always looks so easy.
(STATIC HUMMING)
(SAFE CLICKING)
-Why was it locked?
-I don't know.
No!
(BEEPS)
Why don't you listen to me, huh?
Why don't you girls listen to me?
The PCM in the atmosphere has
fallen to three parts in a thousand.
COMPUTER (ON PA): Attention
all Citizens. Attention all Citizens.
Stand by for an important
public bulletin.
Megropolis 1 is now under the
management of the Citizens' Revolution.
The Director, the Tax Gatherer
and all other Company officials
are to be arrested on sight.
It's happened.
All guards are ordered
to lay down their arms
and join their fellow Citizens
in peaceful cooperation.
There! Stop or we fire. Let's get her!
Citizens,
I elect to join the revolution.
The rule of the Company is ended.
All work places will remain closed
until further notice.
Long live the revolution.
-(CORDO CHEERING)
-What's wrong?
It's over!
-Cordo!
-CORDO: We've won!
-We haven't.
-CORDO: What?
That bulletin was fixed.
It was the Doctor trying to
push things on a bit.
That'll bring the whole city
onto our side.
I don't know why you're hesitating.
Yes! We've got the guns,
we should get out and help them.
What do you think, Bisham?
Cordo's right.
The fight has moved on from here.
Synge. You can run things down here.
I suppose so, but leave K9 guarding
the corridor, eh, just in case?
Yes, of course.
You there!
What are you scum doing up here?
This is an abominable crime.
An outrage!
Leave at once, do you hear me?
It's the Gatherer.
It's the Gatherer!
I order you to leave.
(ALL CLAMOURING)
You'll pay dearly.
Keep back! Don't you dare!
-I'm an official of the Company!
-Get him!
Oh! Oh.
(SCREAMING)
(ALL CHEERING)
And we'll do the same for The Collector
when we find him, won't we, Citizens?
Yes!
(WHEELCHAIR SQUEAKING)
(BEEPING)
Kindly make less noise.
Oh, I was just checking the books.
Your appearance is not unexpected.
I'm not the auditor,
-I'm the Doctor.
-I know.
DOCTOR: Mmm.
If you intend to kill me,
as you see, I am unarmed.
No, I won't kill you.
Just close you down.
An idle boast.
Other competitors have tried.
Would you care to see our prospectus?
Oh, delighted, delighted.
Hmm. Company solidly based,
with a widely diversified
operational field. Yes.
You're a fool, Doctor. I shall have
you steamed for your interference.
Yes, I cut the answering service
not to interrupt our little conference.
Very well.
I see I underestimated you.
What are your terms?
Tell me about the Company.
-Ah, you're interested.
-Yes.
Oh, an excellent outfit
to work for, Doctor.
Progress from medium to
senior management level can be
remarkably rapid
for the talented Executive.
Yes, cut the sales talk.
Where's the Head Office?
-Usurius.
-Ah!
I might have guessed
from your squiddy little eyes.
Hmm.
You are acquainted with our species?
Oh, yes. Oh, yes.
The Usurians are listed
in Professor Thripsted's
Flora and Fauna of the Universe
under poisonous fungi.
I don't entirely like your attitude.
If you want to get on
in the Company you'll have to...
What? What? Are you mad?
Quite mad. Mad as a hatter.
Tell me,
how did you get control of humanity?
A normal business operation.
The Company was looking
for property in this sector,
Earth was running down,
its people dying.
-We made a deal.
-Go on.
Yes. We moved them all to Mars.
After our engineers had made that planet
habitable for their species.
And then taxed the life out of them?
I mean, to recover your capital costs.
Quite so, quite so.
Then, when the resources of Mars
were exhausted in their turn,
we created a new environment
for them here on Pluto.
Phew! What about the four
intervening planets?
They weren't considered viable
by our engineers.
So then you really put the screws on.
I mean, the running costs
must be very high.
Six suns to be fuelled and serviced.
Six suns. Six! My, my.
And so when this planet's exhausted,
you can move
your slave labour force elsewhere?
Alas, no. There is nowhere else
that is economic.
This branch will close.
Leaving the humans to die.
When the suns run down, yes.
A matter of a few years without fuel.
They're not a good workforce,
in any case.
Many of our other operations produce
a much higher return with less labour.
You bloodsucking leech!
You won't stop till you own
the entire galaxy, will you?
Don't you think commercial imperialism
is as bad as military conquest?
We have tried war,
but the use of economic power
is far more effective.
You...
(DISTANT GUNFIRE)
Ah! (LAUGHS)
The revolution's getting nearer.
What's the Company policy on that?
It will be quelled.
Business will continue as usual.
Oh, wake up.
Wake up. Look at the facts.
-I know the facts.
-You and a handful of bureaucrats
won't put the people back
in chains now.
Then they will die.
Oh, it's you again. What did I say?
Our conference has gone on
too long, Doctor.
It is time to implement
contingency plan A.
(DOCTOR LAUGHING)
This switch
controls the sprinkler valves
throughout the city.
Rain stopped play? I don't think
that'll damp down this revolution.
The sprinklers will release dianene,
a deadly poison.
Within 1 0 seconds,
everyone in the city will be dead.
-Except you.
-Exactly. I do not breathe air.
No, but this chap at my shoulder,
he breathes air.
Kill him!
-Don't be a fool.
-Guard, kill him!
Good throw! Good throw.
(GROANING)
What's contingency plan B?
Nobody understands,
business is business!
What do we do now, Doctor? Kill him?
You'll like this bit. You'll like it.
9-0-9! A mistake in
the Megropolis 6 analysis.
Recheck!
COMPUTER: 9-0-9. Recheck.
Megropolis 6 analysis
confirmed correct.
(LAUGHS)
Commander, Commander,
arrest these idiots. I have a problem.
9-0-9.
Megropolis 4 analysis.
Mistake. Recheck.
-9-0-9...
-Collector,
in the name of the work units,
I order...
People, Cordo.
Yes. In the name of the people,
I order you to be tried by...
DOCTOR: Cordo,
I don't think he's listening.
Negative surplus.
Inflationary spiral uncheckable.
Negative growth!
This branch is no longer viable.
We are bankrupt. Business failure.
Closure imperative! Cut losses!
Liquidate.
Immediate liquidation necessary.
I'm sorry I'm late. What happened?
-Well, I don't know.
-I do.
He's gone back to his natural form.
He was only held in that state
by particle radiation.
That's why he never left that machine.
-You mean he's in there now?
-Oh, yes.
Well, we could make a hole in it.
Do you think he'll come out again?
Well, you could put
the plug in, if you want.
I don't understand.
Why was it necessary for him
to make himself look human?
Well, if you'd seen a Usurian,
you'd know what I mean.
They look like sea kale with eyes.
I mean, would you take orders
from a lump of seaweed?
Huh? Hmm? Cordo?
Leela, let K9 in the Tardis.
Goodbye, Cordo.
I wish you could stay, Doctor.
There is much to do.
Well, I'll pop back and see you again
when you've settled again on Earth, eh?
That'll be hard work.
Well, you're used to hard work.
This time, you'll be free.
-Goodbye, Veet.
-Goodbye.
Till the next time.
(WHISTLING) Come on, K9. Come on.
You really believe
we can colonise the Earth again?
Well, I do, I do. The Earth will have
regenerated itself since you left.
Get back to your place
under your own sun.
Those sky freighters,
they'll make that journey?
Of course they will.
Three hundred million of you can't
go wrong. Goodbye, everyone!
-Goodbye.
-ALL: Goodbye!
K9: King to bishop four, mistress.
Which is more than I can say
for the Tardis.
Eh?
Nothing.
I was just finishing a thought.
Now, where were we?
K9: Mate in six moves, master.
Oh, be quiet, K9.
I wonder why the Collector
gave in so easily?
I thought he would fight.
He got a bit of a shock. You see, I fed
a 2%% growth tax into the computers.
Index-linked.
Blew the economy
and he couldn't take it.
I do not understand.
You did something clever?
Well, I think it...
What do you think, K9?
-Affirmative.
-K9 thinks it was clever.
I am so sorry, K9.
-Apologies are not necessary.
-No, shut up while I apologise.
I am so... Listen.
As soon as I've reset the coordinates,
we'll finish that game of chess.
(K9 EXCLAIMS SOFTLY)
(LOUD RUMBLING)
That noise, Hade.
Can't something be done about it?
We shan't hear her.
It's vibration in the exchanger,
Your Magnificence.
I know what it is. I don't want
my pleasure ruined by it.
Her cries will be clearly
audible, Your Honour.
What's that?
The subtleties will be lost.
The deeper notes of despair,
the final dying cadences.
The whole point of a good steaming
is the range it affords.
Marn, I... Er, no, uh...
I'll see if the discriminator
can be adjusted, Your Immensity.
Doctor, can you hear me?
I can't give you any longer.
The exchanger's going
to blow any second.
Get out, Doctor. Get out now!
What was it?
I thought I heard someone say
''Doctor'', Your Sagacity.
It wasn't the girl. There hasn't
been a peep out of her.
Precisely, Hade.
Something has gone wrong.
Order the guards to investigate.
Immediately, Your Omniscience.
Come along, Marn!
-Flow valves open.
-Main pumps in.
SYNGE: Sixty atmospheres, still rising.
Plug the auxiliaries in. Quick!
Auxiliaries in.
-She's cooling, look.
-We've made it.
Unless the air plates
have buckled, Synge.
Let's hope they haven't.
Do you think the Doctor got out in time?
If he didn't, he wouldn't have
known much about it.
We gave him his two minutes.
More than his two minutes.
-(REVERBERATING THUD)
-Listen. In the vent!
He's made it!
-Leela!
-DOCTOR: Who was making all that noise?
I was, Doctor.
I told you not to use that radio link.
We had to tell you
that your time was up, Doctor.
You told the Collector, too!
That fish-blooded sadist
had Leela's casket wired for sound.
Ah-ah, Cordo.
We've got a great deal to do yet.
-It's going well, though, Doctor.
-Is it?
The PCM is clearing from the
air faster than I expected.
It's down 1 0 points already.
All my men are out putting some fight
into the work units.
If just one District joins
the resistance, the word'll spread
-through the whole city.
-DOCTOR: Shh.
Where's the public video system
controlled from?
The Collector's palace.
Yes, he runs everything from
the computer room. Why, Doctor?
If the public video system announced
there'd been a successful rebellion,
think of the effect. Hmm?
-Everyone would believe it.
-Right.
Yes, but the palace is guarded
by his Inner Retinue.
He's guarded by his Inner Retinue,
and most of them are down there
with him. Come on, Leela, let's go.
Megro Guards!
Megro Guards coming this way!
Everybody keep calm, keep calm.
Keep quiet. You two back there.
You three over there.
Leela, behind the door.
-What do you want here?
-All right, drop your guns.
Tie them up.
Come on.
Pretty soon, Bisham,
you'll will be under siege here.
K9?
I want you to hold out
as long as possible.
-Yes, Doctor.
-We'll do it, Doctor.
Of course you will.
Now we have more weapons,
we can hold the corridor.
Good man. K9?
LEELA: K9?
-K9?
-K9?
-K9?
-K9?
-K9?
-K9?
DOCTOR: K9, where are you?
-Master.
-Ah, there you are. Listen.
I want you to give my friends all
the help they need. You understand?
I am at full offensive capability,
master.
You're a good dog. Come on, Leela.
Gentlemen, good luck.
-BISHAM: Thank you, Doctor.
-Right, Doctor.
An unprofitable operation, Hade.
Your Supernal Eminence,
I simply can't understand it.
No one has ever endured a steaming
without vocalising
in the most gratifying fashion.
A complete waste of time.
And we've lost a .04 7%% in production.
Unpaid overtime
to be introduced immediately
for all work grades. See to it!
Without fail, Monstrosity,
without fail.
What is it?
Your Excellence, sir.
Some minor disturbances.
It may not be wise to travel
in the subways
-until the trouble has been suppressed.
-What trouble?
It appears that some of the work units
are refusing to
leave their dormers, Excellency.
Refusing to leave?
I've never heard of such a thing.
THE COLLECTOR:
This situation must be normalised.
Any sustained unrest
among the workforce will adversely
affect Company profitability.
Sing adoration to our Company!
I have dispatched a division
of the Retinue, Excellency.
The account will be swiftly settled.
With interest, Commander.
They must be made to pay.
I will introduce a swingeing
output-linked penalty tax
in my next monthly budget,
Your Corpulence.
The Doctor must be behind it.
I sense the vicious doctrine
of egalitarianism, Hade.
Everyone knows your senses
are infallible, Your Promontory.
Have the two guards reported
from Main Control yet?
No, Your Omnipresence.
My underling Marn is investigating.
Not good enough, Hade. Not good enough.
I am noting your work rate.
I will instigate action myself,
Your Aggrandizement.
Instantly. Immediately.
You'll never believe this, Bisham,
but I'm really beginning
to enjoy myself.
The air's better without PCM, isn't it?
Yes, we'll never pay
breathing tax to the Company again.
Oh, we'll pay no more taxes, brother.
The Gatherer's got his
last talmar off of us.
I feel so good, like a new man!
Keep an eye on the corridor, Cordo,
or you'll be a dead new man.
All right, Mandrel. I know.
K9's got it covered.
I wonder what's happening
in the subways and dormers?
Theoretically, the dispersion rate
of the PCM should be slower down there,
but there should be something
happening by now.
If the work units turn,
the guards will really have
their hands full.
Come on, move yourselves.
Report for work at once.
-(CLAMOURING)
-Work! Work! Work! Gatherer's orders.
GOUDRY: We're on strike, brother.
Join us or get out.
Who said that? Who was it?
Me.
-Nobody works today.
-VEET: Nobody works today.
That's mutiny against the Company.
You've just earned
yourself an early death day, Citizen.
-No, no, no.
-Why not?
No, don't kill him.
He hasn't done you any harm.
-Then I shall kill him before he does.
-No.
-Get up. Come on, get up.
-Doctor,
the last one I spared got away
and warned his comrades.
That is why I was captured.
Then we'll make sure this one
doesn't get away.
Here, look at me. Look at me!
Now, listen.
It's your sleep time.
Sleep time.
You're feeling very sleepy.
Very sleepy.
It's your sleep time.
You will go to sleep
and stay asleep
until I tell you to wake up.
Until I tell you to wake up.
Come on. Come on.
-Wake up.
-How did you do that?
What, that? (SCOFFS)
It's just a knack.
You've either got it or you haven't.
-Doctor!
-What is it?
This is where the grey one,
the Collector, sat.
Hmm. What, like a spider
in the middle of a web?
Yes, yes.
I understand all this.
He has a computer feeding
and analysing the daily returns
from each Megropolis.
Suppose...
Suppose he wants to broadcast
some pleasing bit of news, hmm?
Like the imposition of a double-vision
tax on people with more than one eye?
-Well, then, he feeds it into there.
-No, he fed it into here.
He did?
I... I fear the situation is worsening,
Your Grossness.
Laxity, Hade, laxity and weakness.
You have shown them too much kindness.
A grave error of judgement.
Grinding oppression of the masses
is the only policy that pays dividends.
Your Orotundity, my Megro Guards
are outnumbered by the rabble.
If I could have two divisions
of the Inner Retinue?
The sole task of the Inner Retinue
is to protect my person.
You've mishandled the situation, Hade.
As for your ambition
to become Tax Master General,
after this, forget it!
-Your Honour.
-What is it, Marn?
I've just heard that
some of the work units
have gone to the roof of Block 40
to have a look at our sun.
Outrageous! Sacrilege!
The work units are absolutely forbidden
to see the light of the sun.
It's far too good for them.
I'll soon deal with this.
The combat situation is escalating.
Those idiots have let it get
out of hand.
It is imperative that I return
to the palace to implement
my contingency plans.
But Excellency,
there's fighting in the...
Quiet!
The Inner Retinue will march
around me in close order.
Their bodies will shield me. Now, hurry.
-Doctor, come here.
-(WHIRRING)
That should do it.
-Doctor?
-Hmm?
What is this?
What, that?
Well, it's a safe. Company vault.
-Doctor, is there...
-Shh, shh.
(WHISPERING) Is there something
behind the door?
-What was that?
-I heard nothing.
-Neither did I.
-Then why are we whispering?
I always whisper
when I'm opening safes.
-What is it?
-What are you doing?
I don't know. It always looks so easy.
(STATIC HUMMING)
(SAFE CLICKING)
-Why was it locked?
-I don't know.
No!
(BEEPS)
Why don't you listen to me, huh?
Why don't you girls listen to me?
The PCM in the atmosphere has
fallen to three parts in a thousand.
COMPUTER (ON PA): Attention
all Citizens. Attention all Citizens.
Stand by for an important
public bulletin.
Megropolis 1 is now under the
management of the Citizens' Revolution.
The Director, the Tax Gatherer
and all other Company officials
are to be arrested on sight.
It's happened.
All guards are ordered
to lay down their arms
and join their fellow Citizens
in peaceful cooperation.
There! Stop or we fire. Let's get her!
Citizens,
I elect to join the revolution.
The rule of the Company is ended.
All work places will remain closed
until further notice.
Long live the revolution.
-(CORDO CHEERING)
-What's wrong?
It's over!
-Cordo!
-CORDO: We've won!
-We haven't.
-CORDO: What?
That bulletin was fixed.
It was the Doctor trying to
push things on a bit.
That'll bring the whole city
onto our side.
I don't know why you're hesitating.
Yes! We've got the guns,
we should get out and help them.
What do you think, Bisham?
Cordo's right.
The fight has moved on from here.
Synge. You can run things down here.
I suppose so, but leave K9 guarding
the corridor, eh, just in case?
Yes, of course.
You there!
What are you scum doing up here?
This is an abominable crime.
An outrage!
Leave at once, do you hear me?
It's the Gatherer.
It's the Gatherer!
I order you to leave.
(ALL CLAMOURING)
You'll pay dearly.
Keep back! Don't you dare!
-I'm an official of the Company!
-Get him!
Oh! Oh.
(SCREAMING)
(ALL CHEERING)
And we'll do the same for The Collector
when we find him, won't we, Citizens?
Yes!
(WHEELCHAIR SQUEAKING)
(BEEPING)
Kindly make less noise.
Oh, I was just checking the books.
Your appearance is not unexpected.
I'm not the auditor,
-I'm the Doctor.
-I know.
DOCTOR: Mmm.
If you intend to kill me,
as you see, I am unarmed.
No, I won't kill you.
Just close you down.
An idle boast.
Other competitors have tried.
Would you care to see our prospectus?
Oh, delighted, delighted.
Hmm. Company solidly based,
with a widely diversified
operational field. Yes.
You're a fool, Doctor. I shall have
you steamed for your interference.
Yes, I cut the answering service
not to interrupt our little conference.
Very well.
I see I underestimated you.
What are your terms?
Tell me about the Company.
-Ah, you're interested.
-Yes.
Oh, an excellent outfit
to work for, Doctor.
Progress from medium to
senior management level can be
remarkably rapid
for the talented Executive.
Yes, cut the sales talk.
Where's the Head Office?
-Usurius.
-Ah!
I might have guessed
from your squiddy little eyes.
Hmm.
You are acquainted with our species?
Oh, yes. Oh, yes.
The Usurians are listed
in Professor Thripsted's
Flora and Fauna of the Universe
under poisonous fungi.
I don't entirely like your attitude.
If you want to get on
in the Company you'll have to...
What? What? Are you mad?
Quite mad. Mad as a hatter.
Tell me,
how did you get control of humanity?
A normal business operation.
The Company was looking
for property in this sector,
Earth was running down,
its people dying.
-We made a deal.
-Go on.
Yes. We moved them all to Mars.
After our engineers had made that planet
habitable for their species.
And then taxed the life out of them?
I mean, to recover your capital costs.
Quite so, quite so.
Then, when the resources of Mars
were exhausted in their turn,
we created a new environment
for them here on Pluto.
Phew! What about the four
intervening planets?
They weren't considered viable
by our engineers.
So then you really put the screws on.
I mean, the running costs
must be very high.
Six suns to be fuelled and serviced.
Six suns. Six! My, my.
And so when this planet's exhausted,
you can move
your slave labour force elsewhere?
Alas, no. There is nowhere else
that is economic.
This branch will close.
Leaving the humans to die.
When the suns run down, yes.
A matter of a few years without fuel.
They're not a good workforce,
in any case.
Many of our other operations produce
a much higher return with less labour.
You bloodsucking leech!
You won't stop till you own
the entire galaxy, will you?
Don't you think commercial imperialism
is as bad as military conquest?
We have tried war,
but the use of economic power
is far more effective.
You...
(DISTANT GUNFIRE)
Ah! (LAUGHS)
The revolution's getting nearer.
What's the Company policy on that?
It will be quelled.
Business will continue as usual.
Oh, wake up.
Wake up. Look at the facts.
-I know the facts.
-You and a handful of bureaucrats
won't put the people back
in chains now.
Then they will die.
Oh, it's you again. What did I say?
Our conference has gone on
too long, Doctor.
It is time to implement
contingency plan A.
(DOCTOR LAUGHING)
This switch
controls the sprinkler valves
throughout the city.
Rain stopped play? I don't think
that'll damp down this revolution.
The sprinklers will release dianene,
a deadly poison.
Within 1 0 seconds,
everyone in the city will be dead.
-Except you.
-Exactly. I do not breathe air.
No, but this chap at my shoulder,
he breathes air.
Kill him!
-Don't be a fool.
-Guard, kill him!
Good throw! Good throw.
(GROANING)
What's contingency plan B?
Nobody understands,
business is business!
What do we do now, Doctor? Kill him?
You'll like this bit. You'll like it.
9-0-9! A mistake in
the Megropolis 6 analysis.
Recheck!
COMPUTER: 9-0-9. Recheck.
Megropolis 6 analysis
confirmed correct.
(LAUGHS)
Commander, Commander,
arrest these idiots. I have a problem.
9-0-9.
Megropolis 4 analysis.
Mistake. Recheck.
-9-0-9...
-Collector,
in the name of the work units,
I order...
People, Cordo.
Yes. In the name of the people,
I order you to be tried by...
DOCTOR: Cordo,
I don't think he's listening.
Negative surplus.
Inflationary spiral uncheckable.
Negative growth!
This branch is no longer viable.
We are bankrupt. Business failure.
Closure imperative! Cut losses!
Liquidate.
Immediate liquidation necessary.
I'm sorry I'm late. What happened?
-Well, I don't know.
-I do.
He's gone back to his natural form.
He was only held in that state
by particle radiation.
That's why he never left that machine.
-You mean he's in there now?
-Oh, yes.
Well, we could make a hole in it.
Do you think he'll come out again?
Well, you could put
the plug in, if you want.
I don't understand.
Why was it necessary for him
to make himself look human?
Well, if you'd seen a Usurian,
you'd know what I mean.
They look like sea kale with eyes.
I mean, would you take orders
from a lump of seaweed?
Huh? Hmm? Cordo?
Leela, let K9 in the Tardis.
Goodbye, Cordo.
I wish you could stay, Doctor.
There is much to do.
Well, I'll pop back and see you again
when you've settled again on Earth, eh?
That'll be hard work.
Well, you're used to hard work.
This time, you'll be free.
-Goodbye, Veet.
-Goodbye.
Till the next time.
(WHISTLING) Come on, K9. Come on.
You really believe
we can colonise the Earth again?
Well, I do, I do. The Earth will have
regenerated itself since you left.
Get back to your place
under your own sun.
Those sky freighters,
they'll make that journey?
Of course they will.
Three hundred million of you can't
go wrong. Goodbye, everyone!
-Goodbye.
-ALL: Goodbye!
K9: King to bishop four, mistress.
Which is more than I can say
for the Tardis.
Eh?
Nothing.
I was just finishing a thought.
Now, where were we?
K9: Mate in six moves, master.
Oh, be quiet, K9.
I wonder why the Collector
gave in so easily?
I thought he would fight.
He got a bit of a shock. You see, I fed
a 2%% growth tax into the computers.
Index-linked.
Blew the economy
and he couldn't take it.
I do not understand.
You did something clever?
Well, I think it...
What do you think, K9?
-Affirmative.
-K9 thinks it was clever.
I am so sorry, K9.
-Apologies are not necessary.
-No, shut up while I apologise.
I am so... Listen.
As soon as I've reset the coordinates,
we'll finish that game of chess.
(K9 EXCLAIMS SOFTLY)