Doctor Who (2005–…): Season 11, Episode 7 - Kerblam! - full transcript

- Hold on!
- We ARE holding on!

- Whoa!
- Well, hold on tighter!

Can you do something
about this turbulence?

I'm avoiding something.

Aagh! Can't get the hang
of these new systems!

- What is it?
- No! It's still coming for us!

Oh! It's a teleport pulse.

Aagh! What's that?!

Delivery for the Doctor.

Ah! It's the Kerblam Man!

- It's the what?
- The Kerblam Man.



You're just making sounds now.

Delivery fulfilled.

And remember, if you
want it, Kerblam it.

Ah!

Space postman. I've seen it all now.

Delivery bots.

Kerblam's the biggest
retailer in this galaxy.

I don't remember ordering anything.

Must have been a while back.

Oh!

What d'you think?

Still me?

Nice.

Check it out, they even use bubble wrap.



Doctor, look at this.

The back of the packing slip.

"Help me."

Probably someone just bored out
of their minds, mucking about.

Trust me, I've been there.

Should have seen what we used
to hide inside the trainers...

What if it's not?

What if someone really is in trouble?

Can't hurt to check, can it, Doc?

Right. Kerblam, here we come.

Oh...

Oh...

There's the planet Kandoka,
and we're on its moon.

Kerblam turned it into
one massive warehouse.

Look at the size of it!

Must be thousands of people in there.

How are we gonna find out
who sent that message?

Halfway across the universe and
I feel like I'm back at work.

Ryan...

...brilliant!

Come on.

- What?
- We're going undercover.

Chop-chop!

Good morning, workers.

- Welcome to another rewarding...
- Can you check again?

We just came in from Kandoka.

We must be on the list there somewhere.

Not expecting anyone new today.

Didn't even know there
was a shuttle coming in.

Do you mind if I take a look?
It might just be the spelling.

By the way, this is our reference.

Oh. You're relatives of the First Lady!

Oh. Did she put that?
We asked her not to.

- Didn't we, gang?
- We don't like to talk about it.

- Oh.
- Yeah. So awkward.

We're very private.

Well, there must be some...

Oh, no. There you are. Got you.

Private shuttle landing.

Sorry. Person error.

Me, I mean. Um...

Right. Well, uh, let's get
you on this induction, then.

Uh, follow me. This way.

Welcome to another rewarding
shift at Kerblam,

fulfilling orders from the
human colony of Kandoka.

- Hi!
- Morning.

Sorry, what's your name?

- Oh. Judy Maddox, Head of People.
- Ah.

Morning, Les. How are the family?

Good morning, Daniel.

My name is not Les,

but I acknowledge your
amusing coworker banter.

Every morning.

So much for machine learning.

Have a great day, Dan.

- Hiya!
- Good morning, new workers.

- Is it me, or are they pretty creepy?
- It ain't you.

Oi, you two, that's robophobic.
Some of my best friends are robots.

You'll be right at home here, then.

Kerblam, fully automated,
people powered.

The system allocates work details

based on fitness, stamina,
dexterity and mental assessments.

Same model as the Kerblam Man!

I love the Kerblam Man.

The Teammates are the
friendly face of the system.

They're here to assist and to
supervise the organic workers.

Organic?

Oh, sorry. Listen to me.

You get so used to the jargon.

Gone native.

Oh! Two hearts.

Courtesy of the First Lady.

Very good healthcare policy. I
don't like to talk about it.

So... Kerblam is completely automated?

Uh, no, 90%, as per Kandokan guidelines.

Proud to be a certified 10%
people-powered company.

I know some people are against
quotas, but I'm all for that one.

Mind you, I would say that, wouldn't I?

Head of People. Self-interest.

It's funny, I don't
normally talk this much.

Huh.

Don't worry, it'll come
back online in a moment.

Not paid your bills?

Build a warehouse on a moon,
it's never gonna be perfect.

We get the occasional power drain.

It's down to the
self-optimisation systems.

How's the morale among the workers?

Uh... I like to think very good.

It's my job to make sure
that everyone's happy. Uh...

Not that it's difficult,

I mean, we're all so grateful
to have a job, right?

We all know how hard
they are to come by.

No, I hope that people feel it's
a privilege to work at Kerblam.

Relax as I affix your Group Loop.

- Are we under house arrest?
- Oh, no.

The Group Loops monitor productivity
and report back to the system.

I wore one of these at my last job.

Oh, really? Where was that?

Sport Stack, People's
Republic of South Yorkshire.

Hmm. I don't know it.

But it's nice to meet
someone with experience.

You'll feel right at home.

Yeah.

Right. Time for the tour.

600 million products,

10,000 employees, the biggest
human workforce in this galaxy.

Welcome to Kerblam.

Welcome to another rewarding
shift at Kerblam,

fulfilling orders from the
human colony of Kandoka.

10,000 workers. One wrote a message.

Might take a while, this.

Maintenance staff are requested.

Thank you, Maintenance.

The system instantly
relays customer orders

to workers in Fulfilments.

They scan the product and send
it down to the packing stations.

Product incoming.

Once it's packed, the customer's
order goes on the conveyor.

Rule number one,

keep all loose clothing, hair and
body parts away from the conveyor

and never, ever, climb
onto the conveyors.

Any person found on the conveyor
faces immediate termination.

This is Final Checks,

where parcels are inspected, sealed,

and go down the hatch...

...to Dispatch.

Through this hatch beats the
heart of the Kerblam operation.

Hundreds of conveyors pumping parcels

down to our fully automated lower level.

From Dispatch, our postmen
retrieve the parcels

and teleport direct to the customers.

- Any questions?
- Can I do the packing slips?

Sorry, only purple Group Loops
work the packing stations.

Oh.

Leisure breaks in the Home Zone.

Right. I'll leave you in the
capable hands of the Teammates.

I'll be checking in on
you, make sure you're OK.

Gotta keep an eye on the 10%.

As my dad used to say, "Go, organics!"

He was, uh... a bit odd, my dad.

- Stand still, Graham.
- What you doing?

Switching jobs with you. I need purple.

Whoever sent that message had
access to the packing stations.

That's where I need to be.

And where does that leave me?

Hello, coworkers.

We're so thrilled to have you with us.

Yasmin Khan, please come with me.

Ryan Sinclair and the Doctor,

great name,

with my colleague to the left.

Hello, team!

Meet you at break time in the Home Zone?

- Yes, ma'am.
- Roger Wilco.

Oh! Did I ever tell you

about a bloke that I met
called Roger Wilco...

Hey, hey, hold on! What about
me?! Where am I going?

Graham O'Brien, a very warm
welcome to Premium Maintenance.

Not a word.

Product incoming.

You two are doing so well!

- Especially for a first day.
- Thanks, Kira.

I was hoping for something a bit
less really repetitive, but...

- ...quite enjoying it.
- Product incoming.

You're a ninja at this, Ryan.

This was my life before you.

Mind you, you should have seen
me when I'd just started.

First month, total nightmare.

Takes me a while to learn
things physically.

I get there in the end, but...

...just some stuff
takes me a bit longer.

Luckily, I had mates who covered
for me in the beginning.

Oh. I was terrible too, my first week.

I'm amazed the system kept me on.

But now, I just take a deep breath
at the beginning of every shift

and tell myself, "Kira
Arlo, you can do this."

Sometimes I almost believe myself.

What I don't understand is

why does Kerblam need
people as a workforce?

These are automated
and repetitive tasks.

Why not get the robots to do it?

Do you not watch the news?

- We travel a lot.
- A lot.

Kandokan labour laws.

Ever since the People
Power protest movements,

companies have to make sure a
minimum 10% of the workforce

are actual people, at all levels.

Like the slogan says, "Real
people need real jobs."

Work gives us purpose, right?

- Some work, maybe.
- Product incoming.

Do you want a tip?

If I ever get bored,

I imagine customers opening
their parcels, back on Kandoka.

Their big smiles.

I only ever got a present
the once, but...

...oh, I can never forget how it felt.

Like...

Like a little box of happiness.

Just one present your whole life?

My birthday, last year.

A little box of chocolates,
from Judy, our Head of People.

Oh! It was so amazing.

What about your mum and dad?

Didn't they ever get you a present?

Never knew them.

But I can still imagine...

...families opening these packages.

We make them happy by
doing what we do here.

You have a great approach to life, Kira.

Thank you.

That's so lovely of you.

Nobody's ever said
something that nice to me.

Where are these packing
slips generated from?

I don't know. They just... arrive here.

Our little instruction slips.

Kira, have you ever met
anyone here who's worried...

...or needs help?

- Help with what?
- I dunno.

Someone who was having a hard time,
or got themselves into trouble.

Word of advice, the Teammates can
hear everything, if they choose.

Everything?

Constant random monitoring.

No such thing as privacy here.

Are you from the union? Is that it?

Just trying to get a sense of the place.

Well, best way to get
along, do as you're told...

...and try not... to
bump into the robots.

If you can manage that,
you might end up...

...on a poster!

That's you!

Film-star looks.

I got extra credit for it.

Sent a poster to my little
girl, for her bedroom wall.

- How old is she?
- Six.

Where is she?

She's upstairs. She's Head of Finance.

No, she's back home, on Kandoka.

She made me this.

Lacquered with arcadium.

Outlast anything, this will.

Including me.

Actually, that's a bit depressing.

Hello, coworkers.

Please confine social
interaction to leisure breaks.

How often do you see your daughter?

Twice a year, I splurge
on an economy shuttle.

The rest of my wages I put
away for her education.

I do this job so... she
doesn't end up like her dad.

- Her dad's alright.
- Well...

...I was a rubbish husband to her mum.

But... I'm making up for it.

It's tough being away from family.

Well...

...at least I'm working,
unlike half the galaxy.

I suppose we've only got
ourselves to blame.

Whilst we were busy
staring at our phones,

technology went and nicked our jobs...

Great conversation, guys.

But unnecessary talking can
lead to efficiency reductions.

Why not pick up the pace a little?

Sure thing, Basil.

Thank you.

He was a pole dancer
till his hips gave out.

I like you, Yaz, you laugh at my jokes.

Hmm. Antique lamp, section 99955/7.

No. Not a good idea.

Not on your first day.

I'll take that. You'll get
lost in the triple-9s.

- Dan, I'm perfectly capable of...
- I know you are.

I'm just not sure the system is.

There's barely anything
down the triple-9s anymore.

The last person to search for an
order down there got the sack.

I never saw them again.

Not having that happen to you.

Not on your first day.

Kerblam performance status.

All systems currently at
optimal... fun... ction...

Another power drain?

..functionality.

System online.

Alright. It's just a
glitch. Back to work.

Come on, Kira. Re-engage
brain, if you can find it.

S-sorry, Mr Slade.

Hey. Don't talk to her like that.

It... it's OK.

- No, it's not.
- Who are you?

I'm the Doctor. I'm new.

And you are?

Jarva Slade.

Warehouse Executive. Your boss.

Well, you've certainly got
the clipboard for it.

Be nicer to Kira, please.

How would you like a warning
for insubordination?

I'd love one! Oh, I could
add it to my collection.

Doctor, don't...

Gentle people skills
advice for you, Mr Slade,

respect goes both ways.

The best managers, the really
good ones, value their staff,

and know instinctively
if someone's in trouble,

or...

...is asking for help.

Now, how good a manager are you?

Know anyone who needs help?

Get back to work.

All of you.

Be careful with Slade.

Last week, Zaff got a warning
for leaning on the conveyor,

and the next day, he was gone.

Gone?

Does that happen a lot?

A few have gone recently.

Zaff, Jax from the canteen,
Chinello from Maintenance.

And it... it's weird, 'cause
Lupa called Chinello's mum...

...and she never arrived home.

Blimey!

You scared me there for a moment.

You should be in Dispatch,
shouldn't you? Not down here.

What you doing,

practising your lurking?

Can you hear me?

Something wrong with
your speech circuits?

Hang on. I'll report it, get
you back to Dispatch...

Dan?

Remember, any problems,
please ask a Teammate.

They're on your side.

Dan?

Dan?

Dan?!

You down there?

Dan?!

Are you there?!

Um...

...I... I just found these.

They belong to Dan Cooper.

Do you know where he is?

OK. Never mind!

Safety rule 198, do not drink
any of the cleaning fluids.

Yeah, yeah. I've got it
now, guys. Thank you.

Your Maintenance mentor is Charlie.

Hmm? Oh, alright, cockle?

- Have a productive day, team.
- Happy maintaining!

Graham. Nice to meet
another real person.

Charlie. I've, um...

...I've just done the gents, so...

Oh, I'll just settle for a wave, then.

Cor, those guys go on a bit, don't they?

I mean, that briefing nearly
lasted half my life. And I'm 310!

Hey, uh, I saw you arrive earlier.

I wasn't expecting anyone new down here.

Well, it's your lucky day,
then, eh, Charlie boy?

So, tell me how all this really works.

The moment there's a mess
or a spill, we get beeped.

There's strict time guidelines

on how quickly we're
supposed to get there

and how long it takes for
us to clear things up.

- Right.
- All laid out by the system.

They check up on us after every task.

So, even though everything's automated,

there's still an idiot boss.

Yeah.

Temporary functionality
issues. Team nine.

Please take an emergency rest
break in the Home Zone now.

So, just to be clear, you
found Dan's scanner crushed.

I heard him yell and now there's
no sign of him anywhere.

We have to find him.

These were delivery bots, like
Kerblam Man, not the Teammates.

You two, stay with me.

I need you to find out the
history of the company

and try and get some
plans of the complex.

How am I gonna do that?

You're perfectly placed.

No-one questions a cleaner.

You've got unrestricted access.

Yeah, and chronic skin irritation.

Graham, have you sorted that spill?

It's alright. All taken
care of. Don't worry.

Everyone, this is Charlie.

Hi, Charlie.

- Oh! Oh, no.
- Oh, it's alright.

- Oh, what am I like?
- I've got it. It's OK.

I'm so clumsy.

- Oh, I don't mind.
- Really?

- Really.
- Just such a butterfingers.

I love butter.

Oh...

Aww.

- Um...
- S...

- Bye.
- Ye...

Workplace crush?

Reminds me of you when you were younger.

When I say younger, I mean last month.

- Funny.
- Yeah.

Come on. We're going
to file a complaint.

Dan Cooper has vanished. Maybe
you should call the police.

There are no police here.

The authorities, then.

We are the authorities. Kerblam
is its own jurisdiction.

We have responsibility for
all employee welfare.

Then you better be worthy
of the jobs you're holding,

because a man is missing and I
don't think he's the first.

Not if this is any indicator.

This came to me in a delivery.

What do you think it means?

Not exactly cryptic.

Someone was worried
about their own safety

and now we're finding out other
people are going missing.

Who has access

to the printing system
for those packing slips?

Nobody.

They're auto-generated
during the order process,

but they're placed in boxes
by the workers in Fulfilment.

Your section.

Have you tried working down there?

There's no time to add stuff to slips.

This was done somewhere else,
before it gets to Fulfilment.

Something is very wrong here at Kerblam.

And if you two don't
do something about it,

I might start to suspect
that you're responsible.

We'll look into it.

You have my word.

Mine too.

Those words better be worth something.

And if anything happens to us

or our new friends

or anyone else here,

you'll have me to answer to.

- Too bombastic?
- Felt about right.

- I kind of liked it.
- Thanks.

Laters!

Ooh. Not doing that again.
Sticking with "Bye".

Catch me up with this.

We storm into management, cause a fight.

Whatever happened to being undercover?

That was before I knew
people were disappearing.

I'm stepping it up a gear.
Going straight to the top.

I bet you were the sort of kid

who liked poking a stick
in a wasps' nest,

just to see what happened.

Don't like bullies,

don't like conspiracies,

don't like people being in danger,

and there's a flavour of all three here.

Now...

...ever hidden in a panelled alcove?

- No.
- You haven't lived.

Why are we doing this, exactly?

We wait until Slade leaves,

then we break back into
his office, obviously.

Oh, talking of wasps,

did I ever tell you about
me and Agatha Christie?

So, how long have you
had a thing for Kira?

How did you know about that?

That's one of my superpowers, yeah.

I can detect even the most
subtle of social cues.

- Really?
- No!

It's obvious!

I don't know. Um...

It's kind of... I just, uh...

It's just... I can't...

I can't concentrate when I'm near her.

It's like I forget everything
that I'm supposed to be doing.

I mean, have you smelt her?

Strangely enough, I haven't.

She smells...

...perfect.

Right.

I haven't told anyone else.

Been on my own here for a long time.

I can tell. Charlie, can
I be honest with you?

I suppose.

See, you know your way around here,

but I... am gonna need
a little bit of help.

See, 'cause I get easily confused.

A bit like you when Kira's around.

And I cannot get my nut around
the shape of this place

'cause it's way too big.

But...

...if I had, like, a,
um... some sort of...

- Diagram of...
- ..a diagram of Kerblam's layout,

maybe I could find things a bit easier.

See? 'Cause without it,

I ain't gonna last
long in the job, am I?

'Cause it'll take me hours
to get to the next spill.

I reckon I could get that.

Our reception is
currently in night mode.

These artefact cabinets contain
the entire history of Kerblam,

from the prototype delivery
bot, right up to today.

- Designs, layout, everything.
- Right.

Won't somebody miss 'em?
Ah, it's just for show.

Like you say, we're only borrowing.

It's not like anyone pays
attention to this stuff.

Yeah. And you've got the codes
for all of these, have you?

The inside of these cabinets
need polishing, too, you know?

Yeah. Of course they do. Right.

Mind if I get a friend
to help me study these?

What? Thank you, cockle. Come on.

Nothing to see here, mate.

I thought Slade would never leave.

What do we think, then?

If this is Slade's office

and everything in this
company is automated,

why does he need a clipboard?

Or a filing cabinet?

Khan and Sinclair, the greatest
detectives in the galaxy.

Ha-ha!

Locked.

Ooh, paperwork. Very retro.

Now...

...what sort of paperwork
does Slade keep locked away?

What is it?

Oh, my God.

You'd better have a very good
excuse for breaking in here.

Your Group Loops told
me you were back here.

Oh! I knew that.

But I forgot that.

That's the problem with conspiracies,

there's so much to think about!

What if I said we got lost,
ended up in here by accident,

just as the filing cabinet
weirdly fell open?

How would that play?

There were no shuttles
from Kandoka today.

I checked.

Who are you? Industrial spies?

I was being honest with you earlier.

We got a message someone
needed help and we came.

People are vanishing and Mr Slade
is keeping a running tally.

Seven people so far.

According to these notes,

it started four months
ago with two workers.

The next month, another.

This month, four.

The disappearances are on the increase.

No wonder people are sending
out cries for help.

And as Head of People for Kerblam,

I suggest you're guilty of
some serious negligence.

Another power drain?

That's not a power drain.

That's a total system blackout.

Power's drained right down
to the foundation levels.

What's down in the foundation levels?

I can help with that.

- Charlie, what are you doing up here?
- Sorry, Judy.

- He's with me.
- And he's with us.

And they are the original
plans for Kerblam.

What are you doing with those?
Those are company artefacts.

Was this down to you?

More urgent question, if
everything's automated

and all the power's shut down...

...why is that robot still active?

Oh, good question. Back
behind me, everyone.

Error reported. Error reported.

- Hey, Charlie, don't, mate.
- I can... I can look at it.

Error reported. Error...

Investigating.

Charlie!

Investigating! Investigating!

Doctor, do something!

I'm trying! The receptor
codes are fluctuating.

Ohh! Oh!

- Are you alright?
- Deep breaths now. You're safe.

This has never happened before
with any of the robots.

You're wrong! When Dan
Cooper went missing,

there were three of those dressed
in those postman uniforms

walking the shelving.

- They came after me!
- Well, that's not possible.

The delivery bots never leave Dispatch.

We'd know. The system would tell us.

I would respectfully suggest that
you can't trust your system.

And we're back online.

But the receptor cells
on this are blown out.

Hey, Doctor, be careful.

Oh... It's as if the system
suddenly channelled all its energy

into this one single Teammate.

The system's attacking us.

It's like the system's gone rogue.

Of course it's gone rogue.

Nobody would do any
of this deliberately.

If I ever find out that you're lying...

I have worked for years

to make Kerblam more of a
people-powered company.

My career has been about bringing
people like Charlie here,

people who need a second
chance, haven't I?

It's true. She's the reason
most of us are here.

She selects all the workers.

We owe her a lot.

I've never seen these papers
of Slade's before now.

Those names,

Zaff, Jax, Chinello, the others,

they're active on the system.

According to the system,

they're still alive and working.

There are 10,000 people here.

I can't keep track of them all.

So, what do we do, Doctor?

If I could get a copy
of the original code,

I could hack in, isolate the
upgrades and see what it's up to.

So, you'll need Kerblam version 1.0?

That'd be hundreds of
years old, wouldn't it?

And I think we can help with that.

Our reception is currently...

Kerblam delivery bot version
1.0. Also known as Twirly.

I don't think we should do this.
If Mr Slade finds out, then...

Leave Slade to me.

Let's just hurry up before the
Teammates come under control.

Ah! Here we go, Twirly.

Nice to meet you.

Quite cute, isn't it?

Yeah. It's kind of retro.

Well, he is getting on a
bit. I love a bit of retro.

Kira Arlo!

Hi! Yes. Sorry, I didn't hear you there.

I was in my own little world.

You are an exceptional worker.

- Kira Arlo...
- Am I?

We are thrilled to reveal

you've been designated
Employee of the Day.

Oh!

Oh, wow. I...

I didn't even know there
was such a thing.

And in recognition of your work,

Kerblam has a gift for you.

A gift?

Come with us.

Customers who selected these items

also bought ear mufflers, pencil
sharpeners and cola bottles.

Say yes now to order these three
for the price of the cheapest two.

- No.
- Thank you.

I have stored your preferences.

And remember, if you want it, Kerblam...

Oh, it's out of juice.

Needs a big recharge before
I can access the code.

Maintenance store. There's
everything there.

It's not a good idea.

Doctor, I've just had a notification

that one of the workers from
Packing has gone missing.

Her Group Loop's disappeared
right off the system.

Name of Kira Arlo.

What?

Kira? We have to find her.

I thought you said

the system didn't notify you
when someone went missing.

Well, it didn't until now.

It's like it's sending
us a deliberate message.

It knows we're on to it.

Where was her signal last recorded?

Um...

...Dispatch.

That's not possible.

No people are allowed down there.

Dispatch. Foundation levels, right?

Where the power's drained down to.

Well, how do we get to her?

You can't. It's fully automated.

There's not even a route down.

But she got down there somehow.

You get what you need from the robot.

Yaz, Charlie, come with
me. We'll find Kira.

Hang on. How you gonna get down there?

I know how these places work.

Get ready to stick it
to rule number one.

You did this in your last job?

Yeah. Once.

- How did it go?
- Really badly.

Sprained ankle and a final warning.

Come on. We have to find Kira.

I should let you know, I
have a coordination problem.

Not super-serious, but, you know...

...makes life... really interesting.

And frustrating. And difficult.

Especially at moments like this.

You don't have to come. I
can find Kira on my own.

Mate, that's not how
we roll. Is it, Yaz?

Nope. We're all in.

Dispatch, here we come.

Aaaaagh!

Aaaaaaaaaah!

Aaaaagh!

Here you are, Kira.

Thanks.

Sorry...

What's this?

Make yourself at home.

OK.

Aaaaagh!

You sure about this?

We'll be safe, won't we?

Definitely! I mean,
the parcels are safe.

We're just parcels now.

Aagh! Gah!

But the parcels get wrapped in
bubble wrap to protect them.

From what?

- Oh, my days.
- Oh!

From that.

Never liked roller-coasters!

- We're gonna die!
- We're going too fast!

We did it!

That was amazing! We're amazing!

Charlie! You're the man!

Aaaaaagh!

Charlie! Charlie!

We're coming!

I can't drop down there.

Of course you can. We both can.

Right?

On one, two, three...

We did it. We're not dead.
We're totally not dead.

Right, Twirly. All charged up.

You may also like to know

we have a one-hour offer on cushions.

Cushions liven up the grimmest
workplace, like this one.

Twirly, hi.

I'm the Doctor and this is
Graham and this is Judy,

and could you pause all
sales protocols for a bit?

- Even the upselling?
- Even the upselling.

You've just had a nap of about 200 years

so your offers are out of date anyway.

Without upselling, my
only purpose is delivery.

We don't need you to
do that either, mate.

The future is very confusing
for my protocols.

I serve Kerblam and Kerblam
serves the people.

Which is why we need your help.

These are my Kerblam credentials,
my own executive read code.

We need you to carry out a task

which may fundamentally save Kerblam.

I am only a delivery bot. See,
now you've made it nervous.

Don't panic, Twirly. You can do this.

It's possible that Kerblam
has been compromised.

I'm gonna patch you into the system.

I need you to look far and
wide, past new upgrades,

firewalls and security patches,

into the base code that
only you can recognise,

and then you can tell us what's going on

and deliver the information to us.

Retrieve and deliver. I understand.

This might tickle.

Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!

Help! Help! Help! Help!

- What happened?
- Help me! Help me!

Why are you saying that?

Not Twirly speaking.

The system, Kerblam.

Help me, Doctor. Help me.

Help me, Doctor.

The system sent the message.
It printed the slip.

It sent it out.

But why would the system need help?

Twirly, what do you mean?

What sort of help? How can we help?

Help required in Dispatch.

- Help in Dispatch. Urgent help.
- Doc.

They've all just gone down there.

Disinfection Post! Get down!

Organic contamination detected.

Initiate disinfection.

Disinfection process unsuccessful.

Ugh, that tastes like...

Organic contamination persists.

Hygiene defences activated.

- Initiate disintegration.
- Run!

Disintegration process initiated...

- Ryan, look out!
- Follow me!

Aah!

I'm never doing that again.

So, we're at the foundation level.

Yeah.

Hello?

Hello?

That's Kira's voice.

How did she get down here?

I think it came from this way.

I'm stupid. Really stupid.

- Can you believe how stupid I am?
- Is that a rhetorical question?

I can't believe I didn't
think of it sooner.

There's too many things going
on, too many variables.

My brain's too crowded.
What's she talking about?

- No idea. You get used to it.
- She normally explains in the end.

These delivery bots have
got teleport circuits.

See?

We don't have to go on the
conveyor down to Dispatch.

If I can hijack their
circuit for one moment...

- Move away from the delivery bot!
- No, Slade, don't.

Very bad manners to
point guns at people.

I've never warmed to you. So,
tell us what you've done.

We saw the list. The names of
the victims you've targeted.

What?

I'm not targeting people.
I'm recording the missing.

Oh. So, it's not you.

No.

Something's wrong with the
system but I don't know what.

That's why I had to make
sure my notes were analogue.

I thought it was you.

I've been tracking you
since you arrived.

- We're trying to help!
- So am I.

But what am I supposed to do?

There's no-one to report
this to, no-one to stop it.

- There's only the system.
- There's me.

I'm responsible for every person
here. You could have told me.

I didn't know whether I could trust you.

I still don't.

Hey, Doc. Come and have a look at this.

Some kind of goo and... Group
Loops! Why are they in there?

I think these are the remnants
of the missing workers.

We're under a vast liquidisation tank.

What?

You mean the robots are
kidnapping the workers,

then liquidising them?

What I don't understand is why...

- Anyone got a tissue?
- Whoa!

Looks like an army.

Hello?

Kira!

- She can't hear us.
- Let me find the entrance.

We've got to get her out.

Why is she in there?

There's no access from here.
We can't get her out!

Complaints have been coming
back for late deliveries.

This must be why.
Everything's stuck here.

Nothing's going out. What's happened?

Being held back.

Power drains.

Mass teleportation hardware,

with huge reserves of power building up.

What if the power's being
drained to be stored

for one huge, simultaneous teleport,

all these deliveries, all at once?

- To do what?
- You said it looked like an army.

What do armies carry?

Weapons.

But that's not a weapon. It's a toy.

And every parcel's got
something different in it.

Almost.

Except what does every
parcel here have in common?

No, Kira, don't!

Oh, my God!

Is that what happened to
Dan? And all the others too?

You knew something was gonna happen.

Charlie?

It's done this deliberately.

We need to find the Doctor.

Deadly bubble wrap.

Totally innocuous,

apart from when it's intercepted
here and weaponised.

Sheets of tiny little bombs
ready to explode and kill.

Every parcel a death trap.

The workers aren't the targets.

It's the customers.

Kerblam's trying to kill
their own customers?

That's the worst business
plan I've ever heard.

Doctor, we found you!

Kira's dead and Charlie had
something to do with it.

What?

Not Kira!

It wasn't meant for her.

The system took her.

It's been fighting back against me.

Because it knew what you were planning.

The maintenance man!
Access to everywhere.

Noticed by hardly anyone.

You've been killing all the workers?

I needed test subjects to be sure

the detonation forces would work
in such a small concentration.

What, Charlie? How do you
know all this stuff?

I lied on my application,

gave you a sob story so you'd
let me in, and you bought it.

I've studied cybernetics,
explosives, teleportation.

I have worked for this. I
don't understand. I...

10%?

They want us to be grateful
that 10% of people get to work.

What about the other 90%?
What about our futures?

Because without action, next time,
it will be 7%, then 5% then 1%.

I am stronger than you.

I am not gonna stand by and accept it.

People like me, my generation,
we change things.

- We make things happen.
- Even if it costs people's lives?

You kill a load of customers at Kerblam,

let the systems take the fall for it,

erode people's trust in
automation, make people angry.

Imperfect technology,
without a conscience.

Machines malfunction,
that's what they do.

No, mate. That's what you're doing.

- Seriously malfunctioning.
- I'm not your mate.

Except Kerblam's system
does have a conscience.

It's been fighting you,
Charlie. It knew it.

It sent a message across the
galaxy, begging for help.

That Teammate in Slade's office,

it was coming for you.

And then Kira.

It took her, knowing how
you felt about her,

to show you how it would feel!

Because how you feel
right now about Kira

is how all those families
and friends will feel

if your plan goes off.

I don't care. I think you do.

I think you came here with a plan,

but you didn't expect to fall in love.

But that's what happens.

Use it, Charlie. Learn from it, please!

No! No...

If that's the price

to change how everyone on
Kandoka sees technology,

then it is worth it for the cause.

This isn't a cause.
You're not an activist.

This is cold-blooded murder.

I can't let the systems take control!

The systems aren't the problem.

How people use and exploit the
system, that's the problem.

People like you.

I don't care what you think.
The delivery goes ahead.

Mass delivery procedures initiated.

Someone grab that controller!

- Aarggh!
- What have you done?

You can't stop it now!

Make it stop! We're not gonna let
you kill all those innocent people.

Destination coordinates
locked. Preparing teleport.

Doc, I hope you've got an
idea of how to fix that?

Not enough time to fix
it. Wait. New idea.

Oh, not enough time for that either.

Maybe worth a go.

- Maybe?
- I mean definitely.

- Grab the postman's head!
- What?

Just like Judy did in
the office. Do it! Now!

I need to sort this.

Does she know what she's doing?

Some of the time, definitely.

Get back here! Stop it! Charlie...

She can't stop it now.

Those deliveries are gonna be
teleported out. I'm sorry.

Twirly, I need your help.

Sleep mode off. Hello again.

Customers, with your
current medical symptoms,

browse blood pressure medication.

This is important.

I've linked you in to the new
system, to all the delivery bots.

And I have a request.

How may we help?

Change of delivery address for
every order about to teleport.

New address, right here.

This hangar, right where we're standing.

I want every Kerblam Man
to deliver to themselves.

Delivery orders accepted.

I want every Kerblam
Man to open the order

they've just delivered to themselves,

making sure they do what
everybody does with bubble wrap.

- Orders confirmed.
- Charlie...

...get back up here, please.

Delivery in process.

- What's going on?
- Delivery received.

Doctor, they're about to detonate.

Charlie, last chance.
Get out of there now!

Opening delivery.

- Activating bubble wrap.
- Get us out of here.

And remember, if you want to...

If you want it...

...Kerblam it.

Kerblam is experiencing

a momentary technical difficulty.

Our expert engineers are already working

to get the systems up and running again

as quickly and safely as possible.

In the meantime, why not consider
a personal mindful moment?

We're suspending all
operations for a month,

pending review,

and while the Teammates
are rebuilding Dispatch.

All our workers have been
given two weeks paid leave,

free return shuttle transport,

and I'm going to propose

that Kerblam becomes a
people-led company in future.

Majority organics. People, I mean.

We're always looking for good workers
to join our management team.

Uh...

Thanks. We're strictly freelance.

- Doctor, can I make a request?
- Always.

If Dan hadn't have switched scanners,

it would have been me in that test room.

He saved my life.

I want to take this to his daughter.

Tell her how much he loved it.

How much he loved her.

It's the least we can do.

Put it down. It's Kerblam bubble wrap.

Uh, you sure you want to pop that?

Let us put the accused to the test.

- Granny!
- King James.

We must purify your land.

- We shall not be stopped!
- Where's the witch?