Dinosaurs (1991–1994): Season 4, Episode 6 - The Terrible Twos - full transcript
Baby reaches his second birthday and it's anything but a celebration as he enters the dreaded Terrible Twos and wreaks havoc on the entire Sinclair household.
Good evening. I am Dr. Became Dino,
well-known child psychologist.
Today's episode of The Dinos
examines one of the scariest
Fire tests of child education:
The defiance phase of the two-year-old.
Like those of you,
the toddlers have, know,
is the second year in the
Child development no sugar licking,
so be warned.
8th
What you will see in a moment,
could shock, outrage you
and scare to death.
Nevertheless, sit back
and relax,
if the baby is Sinclair
reached his defiance phase.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BAB Y
Good, mother, you are there.
You can me
help at the party for the baby.
Another child's birthday.
As a grandma I should
to become sentimental,
and yet I feel strangely quiet.
Would you go in the drawer
see two candles?
- Two? Why two?
- The baby celebrates the second birthday.
Runs! Everyone, run away!
- Mother, what are you doing?
- She leaves, Fran.
- Good idea. Let her.
- Stay there and watch everyone...
Why are you going?
You will miss the party.
The second birthday
is no reason for a party.
The baby is coming
in the defiance phase.
- Defiance phase?
- Yes.
A strange, evil power
takes the child,
turns it into an insane,
destructive monster,
capable of unspeakable atrocities.
This is a dark, terrible day.
And we wanted
that you jump out of the cake.
The defiance phase of the two-year-old.
That's an old-woman story.
Do I look like a debutante?
Think back, Fran.
You participated twice.
Robbie and Charlene.
Let's see.
I remember,
I decorated the cake with twos...
And then they were three.
That's funny.
I do not remember anything in the year.
Fran, let me try.
I stole a little from the glaze
Robbie's second birthday cake...
And then it was this morning.
Did I miss something, Fran?
Geez.
Funny, none of us remembers
at the time when the children were two.
It was so traumatic and terrible
that you have supplanted it,
and now it happens again.
Be scared.
Be very scared.
Happy birthday, dear baby,
Birthday
- good luck.
- Good luck.
Ok, my boy, blew out the candles.
Infant!
Devil chocolate cake.
Honey I'm home.
I want my presents!
I want my presents right away!
They come, honey.
Earl, I can do it
Do not calm down for much longer.
Just a couple of minutes.
They do not build alone.
Or?
For a dollar more
it would have done the store.
One dollar? Forget it!
I am the birthday girl!
Give me gifts!
Do you have any idea?
There is something
that I built in plants.
I do not know if he will like it.
- Gifts!
- Get it!
- Yes. OK.
- Immediately, immediately, immediately!
So, honey...
Let's play a game.
Yes. Do you want to play a game?
Yes.
- Ah yes?
- Let's play... Hol Snooky.
OK. How do we play this?
That's Snooky.
Get him!
That will be a lot of fun.
My cock. You...
- Gosh, Charlene.
- Hey, birthday boy,
the help is coming.
Please, brother,
a little something,
that I built for you.
- Give me, give me!
- I probably lost a finger.
- A toy train.
- Yes, build it for a year.
I even carved little forks
and spoons for the dining car.
Was not that careful?
Will something from the store!
The clear paint protects
not as he should.
I'm sorry.
I am not happy!
I am not happy!
Earl, we need the kids car right away.
I'm almost there, Fran.
A few screw turns...
Damn!
Please, hurry up, Earl.
Out there
a two-year-old jumps to the ceiling.
Mom, should we do something?
Yes. When his diaper loosens,
That will not be nice.
I know. We play him
his blarney birthday video.
Mom! Blarney is crap!
He's awful, Mom. Could me
do not imagine a worse role model.
Damn it! I hate you,
you stupid toy!
Ok, let's go
I'm Blarney, I love you.
HIA HIA HOH
And if you're nice,
do you love me
HIA HIA HOH
It seems to him
to have calmed down a bit.
Love love here
and love love there
Love here, love there
Love everywhere, yeah.
It's interesting.
He likes children.
Ewas to Blarney gets pure feelings
of warmth and affection.
Eat glass, Blarney!
Die, son of a bitch, die!
I have to say, I'm on his side.
That's enough.
I have enough of your behavior.
- You go to your room now.
- No! I want presents!
You go to your room.
There are no more gifts.
- Time for gifts!
- What?
No. He was terrible all day.
He no longer deserves gifts.
Dear Fran, you know so little
with parenting.
My boy,
this gift is only
for like little boys.
You can have it,
if you promise to be good.
I will be good.
I promise it.
That's not right, Earl.
- Bribe a child for it to hear.
- And if it works?
It's a short-sighted,
short-term, quick solution.
You do not have to praise me.
Here, my boy, look. A car!
A car!
- Man!
- Come on.
Dad, you never have me
bribed with something so great.
You were never angry enough
to earn it.
Nothing calms a child faster
as a brand new toy.
Do you see? He is happy.
It was only
some child psychology asked.
What's happening?
Now I come!
Once again!
That worked brilliantly.
Once again!
As I said, Fran,
nothing calms a child faster
as a sedative.
Do you have Phenobarbitol, Dr?
Moment. I have him
not yet investigated.
I can not just arbitrary
prescribe dangerous medicines.
Yes, I can.
But in that case I do not want to.
We are at a loss.
I always get angry
although I know
the baby needs love and compassion.
- And where is he now?
- In the box.
We had to do it.
He bit his way through the straps
at his child seat.
Very inventive.
May I see the child?
Clear...
He is the doctor. You know that.
Hello, my little one.
Look at me and say...
Close the box!
Close the box!
- Defiance phase.
- We suspect.
I saw that hundreds of times.
A two-year-old child
expected by his parents,
that they give him firm boundaries.
I suggest they wall it
a year into a cave.
Here. Go to the hardware store.
They give you cement and a trowel.
Dr., can I have that again
if he digs out?
We are fortifying our baby
not in a cave.
I read, in other countries
Achieve great success
by locking in the tool shed.
I'm sorry, Earl,
but there has to be a better way.
Hey, Fran, I think
I have the answer here.
This is Mrs. Woodhouse,
the famous children / animal-tompteuse.
Shake. Yes.
On.
Good girl.
- Yes.
- She works with our baby.
It seems a bit extreme to me.
Come on, Fran,
we are at the end of the flagpole.
Take a longer and fear you
not to use them.
It makes a lot of sense, Fran.
- I do not know.
- The child demands discipline.
It is starving
to the taste of the whip.
You have to be strong
and never give up.
Parenting is the victory of the will.
We will demonstrate it now.
- Remove the muzzle.
- OK.
Pull on a leash.
OK.
Bad baby!
We'll do that for a whole year.
- You finally got him to bed?
- Yes.
He was a bit sluggish,
after he had eaten the whole sofa.
I wish mother was here.
She always has an answer
for such things.
- Where is the old witch actually?
- Not in her room.
Robbie and Charlene are going,
to look for her.
What else am I supposed to do?
Paint a pentagram on the floor
and sacrifice a goat.
- That should conjure her up.
- Where is the problem?
Go on.
I have a full and active life.
- Where have you been?
- On the dog track.
And makes fast.
I'm still in the last third.
Mother, you were right
about the defiance phase.
We need your help.
Is it true, Earl?
- Yes / Yes.
- Yes.
Now you need me.
Now I am the queen of the ball.
But yesterday it was said
she is old, useless.
It does not contribute anything.
We wish she was dead.
- But I meant it lovingly.
- Yes.
- Please, we are desperate!
- Yes.
I already told you.
He is two, defiance phase, end of the song.
We can not do anything?
There is no help for us?
Earl,
I can not stand this much longer.
Stop.
I hate it,
to see you so desperate.
Listen, I'll tell you something.
In times of desperation,
if I'm lost looking for answers,
I turn to a book.
- The book?
- Exactly, the yellow pages.
Over there. Give it to me, honey.
Thanks.
PANGEA
YELLOW PAGES
Here's the guy I thought about.
He knows a lot about rituals
to drive out evil spirits
and the fight against the powers
the extreme darkness.
The Dinorzist?
Thank you for coming.
Do you want background information?
They do not help me.
- The child is two?
- Yes.
Heaven have mercy on this house.
Follow me.
Yes.
Yes.
I have been waiting for you.
I know the baby well.
Watch out for
the smell of sulfur in the air.
We could do it for a long time
no diaper change.
The child is the absolute evil,
an unimaginable horror.
He becomes your soul
turn inside out
until your thoughts are destroyed
and your mind is destroyed.
He knows our child really well.
No no! Will cook right away!
- Did the child have dinner?
- Do not want dinner!
Give me dessert.
Immediately wants a million cookies!
Do you have his dinner plate?
Fast.
Two varieties of vegetables? Very balanced.
Give me dessert!
You get your dessert,
if you have eaten.
No no! Give me cake!
Ice cream!
- You start with the rice.
- No!
No rice!
Cream pie!
The will of the child is strong.
Say it to me.
The power of rice forces you.
- Bring me cream cake!
- The power of rice forces you!
- The power of rice forces you!
- The power of rice forces you!
- The power of rice forces you!
- The power of rice forces you!
- The power of rice forces you!
- The power of rice forces you!
Toddler, you are not angry,
but your behavior is evil.
Although you our patience
put to the test
we will not give in.
We will set limits
not as punishment,
but so you have limits.
I want to watch tv!
- When does the child go to bed?
- 20 o'clock.
It's too late to watch TV.
It's bedtime.
No! Do not want to go to sleep!
Will not, do not want!
You will sleep, because I read
the bedtime story.
Not the story!
Not the story!
"I do not like blue eggs and toast."
Blue eggs and toast...
I hate the most.
Would you like her eat on a rug?
"Would you take her with you?
Eat a beetle?"
The power of darkness
is strong in it.
You want to destroy everything around you.
You need a break!
No time out!
I can not watch!
Take her out!
Close the door.
And, no matter what you hear, open...
I repeat, do not open the door!
Understood.
- Come on, Fran, hurry up.
- Come on!
That's awful, Earl.
We should be in there.
He is our baby.
Keep calm, Fran, the guy's a pro.
He knows exactly what he is doing.
Help! Let me out of here!
He ordered us not to open the door.
In everything that is sacred to you,
let me out!
What the...
What happened?
He needed a break.
Fran.
Kind heaven!
Sorry! Have to go.
Had another date.
Another profession...
I am the baby. Must love me.
That's not normal!
It is 4 o'clock in the morning.
Is he never quiet?
I want a pony! No, I want to go to the beach.
A whole year. A whole year of it.
I can not stand it
until his third birthday!
Give me biscuit! Will play horses!
I want water!
He will be his third birthday
do not experience.
- I have a really lame idea.
- Everything is worth a try, honey.
Do we have birthday candles?
OK. Candles are lit.
Is the glaze secured?
OK. Charlene, you sing the high notes.
- OK.
- And whatever happens
just keep singing.
Happy Birthday to your birthday
- Happy Birthday...
- I want biscuit!
Just keep singing!
Third birthday Dear baby...
Chewing gum! Give me chewing gum!
Happy Birthday to your birthday
I want chewing gum. Give me chewing gum.
Mummy.
Not the mother!
Is it my birthday?
- Yes.
- That's right, my darling.
You are not two anymore.
You are now three.
Now blow your candles out.
Yes. Yes. OK.
I'm starving.
How about some cake?
Nice to have you back, my boy.
Yes / Yes.
I have to say that was inexcusable.
Propose, the defiance phase
to manage the two-year-old
by lying to a child,
give him a muzzle
or a year into a cave
walls, is at best reprehensible.
I condemn the makers of The Dinos
for her irresponsibility.
And I demand,
that they justify themselves.
I'm waiting for your answer.
well-known child psychologist.
Today's episode of The Dinos
examines one of the scariest
Fire tests of child education:
The defiance phase of the two-year-old.
Like those of you,
the toddlers have, know,
is the second year in the
Child development no sugar licking,
so be warned.
8th
What you will see in a moment,
could shock, outrage you
and scare to death.
Nevertheless, sit back
and relax,
if the baby is Sinclair
reached his defiance phase.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BAB Y
Good, mother, you are there.
You can me
help at the party for the baby.
Another child's birthday.
As a grandma I should
to become sentimental,
and yet I feel strangely quiet.
Would you go in the drawer
see two candles?
- Two? Why two?
- The baby celebrates the second birthday.
Runs! Everyone, run away!
- Mother, what are you doing?
- She leaves, Fran.
- Good idea. Let her.
- Stay there and watch everyone...
Why are you going?
You will miss the party.
The second birthday
is no reason for a party.
The baby is coming
in the defiance phase.
- Defiance phase?
- Yes.
A strange, evil power
takes the child,
turns it into an insane,
destructive monster,
capable of unspeakable atrocities.
This is a dark, terrible day.
And we wanted
that you jump out of the cake.
The defiance phase of the two-year-old.
That's an old-woman story.
Do I look like a debutante?
Think back, Fran.
You participated twice.
Robbie and Charlene.
Let's see.
I remember,
I decorated the cake with twos...
And then they were three.
That's funny.
I do not remember anything in the year.
Fran, let me try.
I stole a little from the glaze
Robbie's second birthday cake...
And then it was this morning.
Did I miss something, Fran?
Geez.
Funny, none of us remembers
at the time when the children were two.
It was so traumatic and terrible
that you have supplanted it,
and now it happens again.
Be scared.
Be very scared.
Happy birthday, dear baby,
Birthday
- good luck.
- Good luck.
Ok, my boy, blew out the candles.
Infant!
Devil chocolate cake.
Honey I'm home.
I want my presents!
I want my presents right away!
They come, honey.
Earl, I can do it
Do not calm down for much longer.
Just a couple of minutes.
They do not build alone.
Or?
For a dollar more
it would have done the store.
One dollar? Forget it!
I am the birthday girl!
Give me gifts!
Do you have any idea?
There is something
that I built in plants.
I do not know if he will like it.
- Gifts!
- Get it!
- Yes. OK.
- Immediately, immediately, immediately!
So, honey...
Let's play a game.
Yes. Do you want to play a game?
Yes.
- Ah yes?
- Let's play... Hol Snooky.
OK. How do we play this?
That's Snooky.
Get him!
That will be a lot of fun.
My cock. You...
- Gosh, Charlene.
- Hey, birthday boy,
the help is coming.
Please, brother,
a little something,
that I built for you.
- Give me, give me!
- I probably lost a finger.
- A toy train.
- Yes, build it for a year.
I even carved little forks
and spoons for the dining car.
Was not that careful?
Will something from the store!
The clear paint protects
not as he should.
I'm sorry.
I am not happy!
I am not happy!
Earl, we need the kids car right away.
I'm almost there, Fran.
A few screw turns...
Damn!
Please, hurry up, Earl.
Out there
a two-year-old jumps to the ceiling.
Mom, should we do something?
Yes. When his diaper loosens,
That will not be nice.
I know. We play him
his blarney birthday video.
Mom! Blarney is crap!
He's awful, Mom. Could me
do not imagine a worse role model.
Damn it! I hate you,
you stupid toy!
Ok, let's go
I'm Blarney, I love you.
HIA HIA HOH
And if you're nice,
do you love me
HIA HIA HOH
It seems to him
to have calmed down a bit.
Love love here
and love love there
Love here, love there
Love everywhere, yeah.
It's interesting.
He likes children.
Ewas to Blarney gets pure feelings
of warmth and affection.
Eat glass, Blarney!
Die, son of a bitch, die!
I have to say, I'm on his side.
That's enough.
I have enough of your behavior.
- You go to your room now.
- No! I want presents!
You go to your room.
There are no more gifts.
- Time for gifts!
- What?
No. He was terrible all day.
He no longer deserves gifts.
Dear Fran, you know so little
with parenting.
My boy,
this gift is only
for like little boys.
You can have it,
if you promise to be good.
I will be good.
I promise it.
That's not right, Earl.
- Bribe a child for it to hear.
- And if it works?
It's a short-sighted,
short-term, quick solution.
You do not have to praise me.
Here, my boy, look. A car!
A car!
- Man!
- Come on.
Dad, you never have me
bribed with something so great.
You were never angry enough
to earn it.
Nothing calms a child faster
as a brand new toy.
Do you see? He is happy.
It was only
some child psychology asked.
What's happening?
Now I come!
Once again!
That worked brilliantly.
Once again!
As I said, Fran,
nothing calms a child faster
as a sedative.
Do you have Phenobarbitol, Dr?
Moment. I have him
not yet investigated.
I can not just arbitrary
prescribe dangerous medicines.
Yes, I can.
But in that case I do not want to.
We are at a loss.
I always get angry
although I know
the baby needs love and compassion.
- And where is he now?
- In the box.
We had to do it.
He bit his way through the straps
at his child seat.
Very inventive.
May I see the child?
Clear...
He is the doctor. You know that.
Hello, my little one.
Look at me and say...
Close the box!
Close the box!
- Defiance phase.
- We suspect.
I saw that hundreds of times.
A two-year-old child
expected by his parents,
that they give him firm boundaries.
I suggest they wall it
a year into a cave.
Here. Go to the hardware store.
They give you cement and a trowel.
Dr., can I have that again
if he digs out?
We are fortifying our baby
not in a cave.
I read, in other countries
Achieve great success
by locking in the tool shed.
I'm sorry, Earl,
but there has to be a better way.
Hey, Fran, I think
I have the answer here.
This is Mrs. Woodhouse,
the famous children / animal-tompteuse.
Shake. Yes.
On.
Good girl.
- Yes.
- She works with our baby.
It seems a bit extreme to me.
Come on, Fran,
we are at the end of the flagpole.
Take a longer and fear you
not to use them.
It makes a lot of sense, Fran.
- I do not know.
- The child demands discipline.
It is starving
to the taste of the whip.
You have to be strong
and never give up.
Parenting is the victory of the will.
We will demonstrate it now.
- Remove the muzzle.
- OK.
Pull on a leash.
OK.
Bad baby!
We'll do that for a whole year.
- You finally got him to bed?
- Yes.
He was a bit sluggish,
after he had eaten the whole sofa.
I wish mother was here.
She always has an answer
for such things.
- Where is the old witch actually?
- Not in her room.
Robbie and Charlene are going,
to look for her.
What else am I supposed to do?
Paint a pentagram on the floor
and sacrifice a goat.
- That should conjure her up.
- Where is the problem?
Go on.
I have a full and active life.
- Where have you been?
- On the dog track.
And makes fast.
I'm still in the last third.
Mother, you were right
about the defiance phase.
We need your help.
Is it true, Earl?
- Yes / Yes.
- Yes.
Now you need me.
Now I am the queen of the ball.
But yesterday it was said
she is old, useless.
It does not contribute anything.
We wish she was dead.
- But I meant it lovingly.
- Yes.
- Please, we are desperate!
- Yes.
I already told you.
He is two, defiance phase, end of the song.
We can not do anything?
There is no help for us?
Earl,
I can not stand this much longer.
Stop.
I hate it,
to see you so desperate.
Listen, I'll tell you something.
In times of desperation,
if I'm lost looking for answers,
I turn to a book.
- The book?
- Exactly, the yellow pages.
Over there. Give it to me, honey.
Thanks.
PANGEA
YELLOW PAGES
Here's the guy I thought about.
He knows a lot about rituals
to drive out evil spirits
and the fight against the powers
the extreme darkness.
The Dinorzist?
Thank you for coming.
Do you want background information?
They do not help me.
- The child is two?
- Yes.
Heaven have mercy on this house.
Follow me.
Yes.
Yes.
I have been waiting for you.
I know the baby well.
Watch out for
the smell of sulfur in the air.
We could do it for a long time
no diaper change.
The child is the absolute evil,
an unimaginable horror.
He becomes your soul
turn inside out
until your thoughts are destroyed
and your mind is destroyed.
He knows our child really well.
No no! Will cook right away!
- Did the child have dinner?
- Do not want dinner!
Give me dessert.
Immediately wants a million cookies!
Do you have his dinner plate?
Fast.
Two varieties of vegetables? Very balanced.
Give me dessert!
You get your dessert,
if you have eaten.
No no! Give me cake!
Ice cream!
- You start with the rice.
- No!
No rice!
Cream pie!
The will of the child is strong.
Say it to me.
The power of rice forces you.
- Bring me cream cake!
- The power of rice forces you!
- The power of rice forces you!
- The power of rice forces you!
- The power of rice forces you!
- The power of rice forces you!
- The power of rice forces you!
- The power of rice forces you!
Toddler, you are not angry,
but your behavior is evil.
Although you our patience
put to the test
we will not give in.
We will set limits
not as punishment,
but so you have limits.
I want to watch tv!
- When does the child go to bed?
- 20 o'clock.
It's too late to watch TV.
It's bedtime.
No! Do not want to go to sleep!
Will not, do not want!
You will sleep, because I read
the bedtime story.
Not the story!
Not the story!
"I do not like blue eggs and toast."
Blue eggs and toast...
I hate the most.
Would you like her eat on a rug?
"Would you take her with you?
Eat a beetle?"
The power of darkness
is strong in it.
You want to destroy everything around you.
You need a break!
No time out!
I can not watch!
Take her out!
Close the door.
And, no matter what you hear, open...
I repeat, do not open the door!
Understood.
- Come on, Fran, hurry up.
- Come on!
That's awful, Earl.
We should be in there.
He is our baby.
Keep calm, Fran, the guy's a pro.
He knows exactly what he is doing.
Help! Let me out of here!
He ordered us not to open the door.
In everything that is sacred to you,
let me out!
What the...
What happened?
He needed a break.
Fran.
Kind heaven!
Sorry! Have to go.
Had another date.
Another profession...
I am the baby. Must love me.
That's not normal!
It is 4 o'clock in the morning.
Is he never quiet?
I want a pony! No, I want to go to the beach.
A whole year. A whole year of it.
I can not stand it
until his third birthday!
Give me biscuit! Will play horses!
I want water!
He will be his third birthday
do not experience.
- I have a really lame idea.
- Everything is worth a try, honey.
Do we have birthday candles?
OK. Candles are lit.
Is the glaze secured?
OK. Charlene, you sing the high notes.
- OK.
- And whatever happens
just keep singing.
Happy Birthday to your birthday
- Happy Birthday...
- I want biscuit!
Just keep singing!
Third birthday Dear baby...
Chewing gum! Give me chewing gum!
Happy Birthday to your birthday
I want chewing gum. Give me chewing gum.
Mummy.
Not the mother!
Is it my birthday?
- Yes.
- That's right, my darling.
You are not two anymore.
You are now three.
Now blow your candles out.
Yes. Yes. OK.
I'm starving.
How about some cake?
Nice to have you back, my boy.
Yes / Yes.
I have to say that was inexcusable.
Propose, the defiance phase
to manage the two-year-old
by lying to a child,
give him a muzzle
or a year into a cave
walls, is at best reprehensible.
I condemn the makers of The Dinos
for her irresponsibility.
And I demand,
that they justify themselves.
I'm waiting for your answer.