Dinosaurs (1991–1994): Season 2, Episode 20 - Nuts to War: Part 2 - full transcript

-

Honey, I'm home.

After a night of terrifying eruption,

Mount Thunder is once again silent.

In the aftermath of this catastrophe,

over a foot of volcanic ash

has blanketed our area,

stranding thousands in their homes,

ravaging millions of acres of farmland

and causing the following schools
to be closed today...

- Yes! Please!
- Please, please!



Molten State University...

- Please!
- Come on!

...all Little Lizard and
Montessaurus preschools...

- Say it!
- Come on, La Brea! Say it.

...Bob La Brea High School...

[both] Yay!

Now, now, kids, hold it.

Just because you get a day off
from school

is no reason to act like wild animals.

[both] OK.

And all operations are suspended today

at Wesayso Development Corporation.

Yeehaw! Yes! A day off!

[all laughing]



J Ash day, ash day
We all stay home 2

Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

Why are we happy?

Because it's an ash day,
we get to stay home from school.

I get to stay home from school?

You're a baby.
You don't go to school yet.

I want to go to school.

- Why?
- So I can stay home.

- You are home.
- Then I got my way.

Let's finish breakfast.
Then I'll get the sled.

- I'm gonna make an ashman.
- I'll knock it down.

And I get to watch daytime TV.

So it's like a whole new world's
opened up.

[male announcer]
Now it's time once again

for Ask Mister Lizard.

[both] Yay!

Hmm. Gosh, Mr. Lizard,

I've never seen
a real jet engine before.

How does it work?

Well, Timmy, the best way
to learn about something

is by taking a good, close look.

Why don't you peek inside,
there you go, OK,

while I step behind
this asbestos shield.

[both] Ooh, he's gonna say it.

Gosh, it's not doing anything.

Keep looking.

OK, but I don't think
it's going to work.

Nothing's happening.

[both] Say it!

[both laughing]

We're gonna need another Timmy.

- Yay!
- He said it!

There are a lot of things
that need doing around here, Earl.

You're way behind
on paying the bills.

Am not.

Look at this heating bill.
It's stamped "pay now or die."

At least they're still
giving us a choice.

Oh! Robbie, don't you have a project

for your science fair tomorrow?

Oh. Yes.

- And, Charlene...
- Don't wanna.

You can help me here in the kitchen.

I'm gonna make a whole pot
of grape jelly.

Hey, now, there's fun.

Ta-da!

- Mama.
- Hmm?

What's that?

Well, this makes
the jelly taste better.

The flavor goes up into this dome,

gets caught in these tubes...

Gee, Mom, that's real fascinating,

but how about if I go to the store
and buy some jelly?

And we can both have a life?

Charlene!

Or not.

Hey, Dad, this was supposed to be
a big, fun day,

and Mom's trying to kill it
for all of us.

I mean, who's the boss
around here, huh?

- Yeah.
- Yeah. [laughs]

- Fran?
- What?

- She is.

[sighs] School. Love it.

Remember, class,

some of the most
inspirational inventions

in the history of science

have resulted from
the fortuitous combination

of commonplace things.

Oh! All right, who threw that?

Hmm, combinations.

Combinations. Let's see, um...

Um... sneakers.

Hmm, yeah.

Um... what else?

What else? A pump.

Yeah. Sneakers with a pump in them.

Hmm.

Let's see...
Oh, what a stupid idea.

Let's see, what else?

Aw, jeez.

I got peanut butter
on my chocolate bar.

Yuck! I can't eat that.

All right, all right. I'm never gonna
come up with an idea.

OK, OK, combinations.

I have to come up with an idea.

Come on, Sinclair, stick with it.

On this unexpected holiday from school,

thousands of very cool guys
and totally hot babes

spent the day frolicking in the ash,

having what many describe
as "the most fun ever."”

That's it. I'm going outside.

Stay in your room,
finish that assignment

and have no fun
for the rest of your life!

Isn't she terrific?
My mother, ladies and gentlemen.

How about some applause for
the guy paying these heating bills?

Earl, get out of Robbie's thoughts
and pay those bills!

Yes, dear. Sheesh.

All right, all right. Shh, um...

Yeah, what do we got...?

Let's see what we got here.

Um, yeah.

An erupting volcano.

Yeah. Uh...

A recycled jelly thing.

Yeah. Um...

And heating bills nobody wants to pay.

[gasps] That's it!

[male] It's a jelly volcano?

Look, look! The jelly represents
hot, simmering lava.

Now watch this.

OK, the steam coming off it
gets trapped here,

flows down here,

where it not only heats the house

but powers the turbine
to generate electricity. [laughing]

See? Light!

Always thought
light was overrated, Sinclair.

Seems to me the important stuff
happens in the dark.

I bet it would actually work.

Think about it, clean energy,
lower heating bills.

This could be good for everybody.

Well, aren't we the little overachiever.

You really want to win this thing,
don't you, Scooter?

Yeah, but the competition
looks pretty tough.

Did you see Billy Melman's project

where you clap and a lamp turns on?

I mean, that's genius.
How am I gonna beat that?

Oh, yeah. Well, the thing about Billy

is he uses substandard materials.

You know, the kind that tend to shatter

when broken over his head.

Yo, Billy, let me see that lamp.

No, no, no, Spike.

Spike, I wanna win this fair and square.

How have you managed
to stay alive so long?

This is a diagram

of all the layers of our atmosphere.

The blue layer represents
the air all around us.

This is clouds,

and, um, the pink layer is hairspray,

and the green layer
is where sneezes go,

and this black stuff is space, see?

Hmm. What are these three
little dots above the clouds?

Oh, uh, uh, those are
my grandparents and my dog,

who got hit by a truck.

A very... touching tribute.

Oh, thank you. [chuckling]

No, no, the green liquid
into the main chamber.

Oh, still, very nice.

Ah, Spike.

What project have you
created for our science fair?

I don't do projects.

You have to do a project.

Okeydokey.

Oh.

- [gasps]
- Well, what do we have here?

Looky, looky.

I call this "what's inside a TV."

Uh... very nice.

Very realistic.

And, Mr. Sinclair,
what have you got for us?

Uh, this is
the Sinclair Power Dome.

Remarkable.

What you've done is utilize

an enormous natural power source

that no one has ever thought
of tapping into before.

Oh, and it's completely
clean power. No pollution.

Do you realize the ramifications

if this project
were actually implemented?

You think it could be?

I don't see why not.

Robert, this little idea of yours

could be the most significant
innovation of our time.

Sinclair, hey.

Yes! Yes! High five! Huh?

[Billy] Clap on, clap off.
I'm a millionaire!

Listen, listen.

"If the full-scale dome works,"
the chief elder said...

I lost it. Oh!
"...we would negotiate with Sinclair

to secure the rights to his design."

"Secure the rights.”

What a beautiful phrase.

- What's that mean?
- It means,

and I never thought I'd be saying this,

the government would have
to give us money!

[chuckles] I'm telling you, Fran,

it's like a dream. Somebody pinch me.

- Ha!
- Doh!

I love you.

Hmm.

Oh, there's our young celebrity.

Look, son, here's another story
about your wonderful invention.

Oh, yeah? What's it say?

Well, to paraphrase,

we're rich.
Money, money, money, money.

Money, money, money, money.

Dad, I didn't invent this dome
to get rich or famous.

- [creatures hollering]
- Whoa! Whoa! Guys!

Oh! Oh, jeez!

I invented it to bring free energy
to all dinosaurs

and improve the quality of life
throughout the world.

Sure, and that's the true source
of my pride, son.

I was thinking we could
stack the cash in the den

and make a little money fort.

- Earl.
- Yes, my heiress?

These are not the kind of values
to teach your son.

Oh, that's all right, sweetheart.

If they're not the right values,
we can always buy new ones.

Dad, not everything is about money.

Yeah, you're right, son.

But this is!

Look, it's great if we can benefit,

but what's exciting about this
is that all of society benefits.

This is something
that's good for everybody.

[male] This is a disaster!

But nothing a chief executive
of your enormous power

and authority can't handle,
right, Mr. Ashland?

- Cut the butt-kissing, Richfield.
- Yes, sir.

- Know what I do with a butt-kisser?
- No, sir.

[groans]

We got a problem, Richfield. This.

The Sinclair Dome, sir?

For years, the Wesayso Energy Division

has been extremely profitable,

obscenely profitable.

Our annual report
is positively scandalous.

[laughing]

But that happy,
carefree time is threatened.

By a boy's science project?

Free power puts us
right out of the energy business.

Or should I say,
Robert Sinclair has the potential

of putting us out of business,

unless, of course,
we put him out of business first.

- Ah-ha!
- That's where you come in.

You want me to eat him, sir?

Don't be ridiculous.

We're executives in a large,
respected corporation.

We don't eat our enemies.

We have lawyers for that.

Someone call a lawyer?

- Not now, Elliot.
- OK.

Well, what do you want?

Information.

I want to know everything
there is to know

about young Mr. Sinclair.

Ah, you want me to spy on him.

Please! Governments spy.

Corporations study.

I want you to do
an independent study

of young Master Sinclair.

And what will my independent
study conclude, sir?

That his dome is a crackpot idea
that'll never work.

With all due respect, sir,

the dome appears to be
elegant in its simplicity

and will probably work forever

without requiring a service department

or an extended warranty.

That's because he has
no corporation behind him.

Ah.

What we've got to do
is discredit the boy.

We've got to make all dinosaurs see

that he is not a miracle worker,

that he really is a crackpot,

a perverse, twisted lunatic
out to destroy everyone!

Mr. Ashland, you're asking me
to destroy an innocent boy

just to protect our corporate assets.

Mmm.

I'm honored.

It's all there in front of you,
Richfield.

Oh, yeah.

Ahh. Ahh.

And if you do your job right,

our young friend is going to
wish he'd been eaten.

[both laughing]

For years, your friends at Wesayso

have provided energy
by burning safe, reliable sources:

Coal, wood, old tires.

But now there's a high school student

living here in Pangaea
who would have you believe

you can get energy
from a mountain. [laughs]

Do you see energy
coming out of that mountain?

{ sure don't.

Or is it coming out of the tires
where it belongs?

Wesayso has taken care
of you and your family

for over 30 million years.

Are you going to listen
to somebody else now?

Isn't that kind of ungrateful?

[male announcer] Wesayso.

We really don't like
having our feelings hurt.

- Oh, what a load of...
- What?

- Never mind.
- Oh.

Excuse me, ma'am. Have you
heard about the Sinclair Dome?

Oh, yes, I have,
and I think it sounds fabulous.

Did you know it was invented

by a 15-year-old high school student?

Well, no, I didn't.

Did you know that boy failed
his science class last year?

Really?

We also hear he doesn't always shower

- after gym class.
- Eww!

What?

And did you realize

this same boy has not denied

favoring prison furloughs
for convicted murderers?

Oh, my!

Let me ask you, when it comes
to energy for your family,

who would you rather depend on,

a reliable old friend like Wesayso

or a smelly dropout
who'd let killers go free?

Well, Wesayso.

That's just common sense.

[male announcer] Wesayso.
We always shower after gym class.

Uh! Yes, like the public
is that easily manipulated.

Ow! Ow! Hey! Hey!

Hey, suck tar!

Robbie, what happened?

I'll tell you what happened.

I invented something that can
make everyone's lives better,

and they're trying to kill me.

That doesn't matter, sweetheart.

You know your family
will always stand behind you,

no matter what.

I want you out of this house
right now!

Good call, Mom.

You are trying to undermine

the very fabric of our society!

Gee, Dad, I thought
you loved the dome!

You said it was gonna make us rich.

Now it's gonna make us
need plastic surgery

- and a relocation program.
- You can't possibly believe that.

Not the baby!

- Huh?
- Jeez.

The Wesayso Company
has been like a loving,

if somewhat sadistic, parent
all these many years.

And how have you repaid them?

By creating free energy
and ending pollution.

You put a knife right in their heart.

Earl!

It's obviously true. I saw it on TV.

Those Wesayso ads are lies.

It doesn't matter.

It's temporarily accepted
by the masses, so it's the truth.

Dad, you're not being rational.

Oh, sure.

And I suppose the crazed mob

on the front lawn isn't rational either.

- Aw, jeez.
- [telephone rings]

Oh, this can't be good.

Oh!

Hello?

- Sinclair!
- Aah!

Mr. Richfield. Uh... I'm sorry.

Stop apologizing!
You didn't do anything.

I'm sorry if my apology offended you.

Stop being so obsequious.

That was never my intent, Your Majesty.

Never mind!

You know, Sinclair,

I've been thinking about these ads
the company's been running,

and I worry that maybe
they've strained our friendship.

We have a friendship?

- I'm speaking!
- Ahh!

So, what do you say
I take you and the family

out to dinner tonight?

Dinner? You? Us? Eating?

Uh, save the sparkling repartee
for the dinner, Sinclair.

And remember, the whole family!

[giggling] Yes. Yes, Your Majesty.

[laughing]

Well, it's all set.

Good. Then let us take a moment

to revel in our evilness.

Huh?

Oh.

[all laughing]

[sniffing] Mmm, that's fine for me,

but give the rest of them
the cheap stuff.

Of course.

- Bonsoir.
- Bonsoir.

Ohh! Boy.

Escargot.

Yeah. [chuckles]

- Hey, Rob.
- Huh?

If Mr. Richfield is big enough

to extend the hand of
friendship and reconciliation,

then the least we can do
is shake that hand

so he won't kill us.

I haven't done anything wrong.

And he's forgiven you.
Now let's go suck up.

Well, if it isn't the Sinclairs.
[chuckling]

What a delightful-looking family
you have, Earl.

Whoa, let me introduce them.

Not interested! Sit down!

- Down.
- Jeez.

My, my. So good to have you here.

Blah, blah, blah, blah,

blah, blah, blah,
blah, blah, blah.

Well, enough small talk.
How about a toast?

To friendship.

[all] To friendship

- Friendship.
- Clink glasses!

- Uh, clink glasses.
- [all] Cheers.

Clink me. Hey, someone clink me.

Ow! Ah!

[laughing]

[growls]

So this is how it all ends.

Shall I expose my underbelly, sir?

[laughing]
Hey, now. Now don't be silly.

How could I be mad at such
an April-fresh bundle

of snugly goodness?

Goochie, goochie, goo. Hey!

[laughing]

Waiter! Two pieces of bread!

I'm gonna make a sandwich.

Ohh.

Excuse me, Mr. Richfield,
but you won't get anywhere

with this inviting us
out to dinner routine.

We can all see right through you.

Sir, he's lying. I can't. I promise.

Ix-nay on the onesty-hay, son.

No, no, it's quite all right, Earl.

I admire the boy's honesty.

Can I be honest with you?

The elders aren't interested
in your dome anymore.

- Huh.
- Hmm?

It seems to have become
unpopular with the public.

Don't ask me why. [chuckles]

But being a corporation

that has always encouraged
the innovative spirit,

we'd like to buy your dome.

Yeah, so it can never be built.

I'm prepared to offer you $500.

[gasps, clears throat]

Have I given myself away?

I don't want your money.

I do! Please?

Smart girl. You must be
very proud of your daughter.

Oh, yes, sir. My daughter.
Very proud. All mine.

My son, who knows?
I was in Babylon.

I don't care what anybody says.
I'm not selling the dome.

Robbie, what are you doing?

Come on, boy.
Let's do business. A thousand.

And that's my final offer.

- No sale.
- Quiet.

- Five thousand!
- Keep talking.

I won't sell it to you, Mr. Richfield.

I'd rather give it to the elders
for free

than sell to you for a million dollars.

This is just a tactic, right?

No, Dad. I mean it.

- Ohh! Gotcha.
- [groaning]

Earl, Robbie isn't playing a game.

He really doesn't want
to sell to Mr. Richfield.

And I'm proud of him.

Oh, yeah, me too.
Proud, proud, proud.

Dad, there's no strategy here.

Robbie's selling us down the river

over some morality thing.

Oh, sure, he is.
Right down the river.

Daddy.

Hmm?

Ow!

Wise up!

Dad, if I sell out to Mr. Richfield,

I'm no better than he is.

No better than me?
You little snot-nosed twerp! I oughta...

Mr. Richfield,

I think maybe you shouldn't
talk to my son like that.

You think? You don't think.

You're a tree pusher,
and you work for me!

Or have you forgotten
who you're talking to?

- Yes, sir, I have.
- Yes!

And until I remember, I wanna say

I don't care if you have enough money

to buy the dome and
the whole volcano. We're not...

Wait a second!
What did you say?

I don't care if you have
enough money to buy the dome.

No. The other part.

Buy the volcano?

That's it. Bye.

[all] Oh!

- Oh.
- Huh.

Check, please.

[male on TV]
Turning to business news,

the Wesayso Corporation
announced this morning

that it has secured the rights
to all land

around and under Mount Thunder.

Aw.

When asked by DNN

if the new owners would
still allow Mount Thunder

to be capped by the free energy dome,

a Wesayso spokesman said
the volcano would be available

as soon as a series of safety tests
have been concluded,

approximately 100 million
years from now.

Oh!

So everything I did was for nothing.

The whole thing was
a complete waste of time.

No, not really, son.

Because I learned
a little something last night.

For 20 years,
I always thought the company

was out to make my life miserable.

Now I know that's not true.

They want to make
everyone's life miserable.

I don't think I would have
known that without you.

Well, always glad to help, Dad.

This portion of the news
has been brought to you by Wesayso.

[male announcer] Wesayso.
We know what you want.

We know what you need.

We know where you live.

[groaning]