Dimension 20 (2018-…): Season 20, Episode 7 - The First Stoats - full transcript

(tense yet whimsical music)
(stoats squeaking)

(tense music continues)

(tense music continues)

- Hello and welcome back to
Dimension 20: Burrow's End.

I am your dungeon master and
warren warden, Aabria Iyengar,

and with me are my, let's check the list,

invasive investigators.

Say hi, invasive investigators!

- [Players] Hi, invasive investigators!

- Then we're going to put
a little chyron in here

that stoats are one of
the most invasive species,



one of the 100 most invasive species,

and now you've learned a thing.

- Kill them all.
- [Rashawn] Coming at you.

- I'll certainly try.

- Vulture releases that list

of the 100 most invasive
species every year,

and I feel like there's a lot
of species that are really

doing a lot of invading,
and they just never seem to-

- Hey, you know what the most
invasive species is? Humans.

- Man.

- Speaking of.
- [Siobhan] Tell us what to do, Aabria.

What are we fucking doing?
- Previously,

- I don't want these. I don't want this.
- [Aabria] on the show,

we kind of came back up
for your first full morning



and first full day inside
the walls of Last Bastion.

Ava did a little walkabout in
the morning, and on the road,

walked into essentially a war room meeting

starring the leaders of defense
and one of the First Stoats

named Kiran, known as the Director,

and later sort of understood
to be the Dictator.

Viola and Thorn had a heart
to heart about their family

and the decisions that would be made

both within yourselves as a
pair and your family as a whole.

Tula and the kids went to go forage

and recover breakfast
for the entire group,

running into Meredith, mother of Lukas,

on the way, and after
some childish overshares,

were scent marked by the coppers,

and you now know you're
all under surveillance.

You all came back together,

and after Jaysohn and Lila
went and spoke with Sybil,

were given a map to find Reactor Charlie.

You took your time, snuck away,

and made your way down to what
sort of revealed itself to be

this massive puzzle of a
room with a singular guard

who you quite embarrassingly took care of

just truly so fast.

I'm not still, that's
not locked in my head

in a really embarrassing
way for my very public game.

And once you solved the puzzle,

realized that inside this
reactor core, under the water,

you found a human skull, a wolf skull,

and a sort of blob of corium

that defies understanding, like lava,

and you all felt the heat
and light and draw of it,

this massive radiation event.

And then the world began to spin,

and this entire floor begins capsizing,

and we pick up now with a dex save.

I need all of you to make
a dexterity saving throw.

The DC is 17.

- May I just muscle up,
use a strength check?

- [Aabria] Yeah, you are
trying to cling and move.

You can make yours a strength.

So it's a strength saving throw.

- And add a plus two,
y'all, if you're near me.

- As a reminder, your Bless,

you guys did some very
cool blessings last time.

All your blesses have run
out, and they are down.

- Yeah, okay.

- Okay, that's actually
going to be a plus six.

What's the DC on this?

- 17.
- 17, okay.

I need a 3 or higher on my d4.
- Okay, calm...

Wait, on your d4?
- My d4.

- Oh!
- Okay, calm down.

- Well, I thought Brennan was going,

I just need a three or higher on my d20.

I was like, all right!
You're very dextrous!

- This is my problem, sometimes I do brag

in a perfectly neutral voice.

- Yes, some of us have a little PTSD

of him being very
effective with his builds.

- Here's some information.

If you find it impressive,
that's up to you.

- That's 100% it, yes.

- I know myself, I know myself.

Ooh, that's a one!
- Oh!

So I need just a little
polite raising of hands

if you failed the check.

Oh, three of you. Very interesting.

The capsizing begins,

and you feel that from
where you're all standing,

almost as if, but not quite,
you guys are the balance point,

almost as if, but not quite,
you guys are the balance point,

and you begin to drop and slide down

towards the water itself.

Half of you begin to cling and
scramble up towards the top,

towards that hole in the
pattern that you made,

but Tula, Lila, and Viola,

you are struggling to find
purchase and make your way up.

The rest of you, what do you do?

♪ I'm going to have to help my wife ♪

- Yeah, can I help my mum?
- Yeah, pick a person.

- Oh wait, actually no,
I should help my sister.

- Yeah, in this moment-

- My mum will be mad at me if
I help her and not my sister.

- So what do you do in order to help Lila?

- [Siobhan] Can I...

Wait, my arms are actually
already activated.

- [Aabria] Yes, they are.
- So I have a 10 foot reach.

- Oh, yeah.

- So can I use that to sort
of essentially prop her up?

- Let's do it this way.

Go ahead and give me an athletics check

to both kind of grab
and bolster your sister

and keep yourself steady
as you're running up.

- Great, and because I
have my arms activated,

I do that with wisdom instead of strength.

- [Aabria] Love it.

- [Siobhan] This is acrobatics?

- This was athletics.
- [Siobhan] Athletics, okay.

- Because you have to hold up your sister.

- Okay, it's a plus
eight because of wisdom.

- [Aabria] Beautiful.

- So it's an 11.

- Ooh.

- We can't have a reaction
to a saving throw, right?

- I used my inspiration already.

- Not right now.

I gave you more because
we are having Chipotle.

- Can I give her my inspiration?

- Yes!
- That's a 19!

- There we go!

- You know what, I
actually like that more.

How do you inspire your brother to get you

as you both sort of move
to each other, cling on,

and continue to run up the
floor, rapidly becoming a wall?

- You're so strong!

- I am so strong! My arms bulk up.

- Perfect, you manage to reach out

with your lightning
reflexes, grab your sister,

and continue to run forward.

We have another problem. Viola
is slipping, what do you do?

- I'm diving after her, grabbing hold,

and grabbing hold of the wall.

I'm hopefully trying to balance her

so that she can leap off.
- Okay, same thing.

Give me an athletics check.
- Okay.

Ay yi yi.

13.

- That's okay.
- Okay.

- With a 13, yeah, you're able
to suddenly turn and reach,

and you can grab her.

You're going to be at
a slight disadvantage

getting everyone up and running again,

but she does not slide into the Blue.

- I'm trying to stabilize her

so that she can then
start climbing herself

as opposed to, I'm not
going to, yeah, try and-

- [Aabria] For sure.

- Which way is it tilting,
and how much of it-

- This is going down. This is coming up.

The entire, that square, is capsizing.

- But not the outside.
- [Aabria] Not the outside.

- Okay.
- Okay.

- Ava, you are very far away from this.

- How far away am I?

- [Aabria] You are 40 feet away
from the rest of the group.

- [Erika] Okay, I may do my
40 foot movement and then-

- Are you going to run down-

- Yes.
- Just to give you a little bit of this,

the instinct here is,
you've got to scrabble up,

so if you turn and move down
in the way that this is going,

you're going to have some
very high difficulty checks

just to keep yourself safe,
let alone rescue Tula.

- Yes.

- All right, as long as
you know. What do you do?

- (shouts) And I fly into a rage.

I sprint 40 feet over to my daughter

and I will try and grapple her.

- Okay, go ahead and give
me an athletics check.

- You can do this.

- [Brennan] Mama!

Mama!

- 21.
- [Aabria] 21. What's your armor class?

- 18.
- [Aabria] Yeah.

- So I take her and I just
scoop her under one arm.

- Guh!
- So in the intervening time,

everyone else is running
up to where you came from.

You've spent the equivalent
time running back down,

and you are about to touch the Blue.

Essentially, this was a reaction

to try to grapple and get stuff done.

- All right.
- And I like the idea

that you wanted to spend
that time getting to her,

but it feels inconsistent

with the time crunch that's happening.

- All right, so I go and I grab her.

Then what kind of check
would you like me to make

to hang on?
- I think you can hang on,

but I think you've got
to make a call here.

You can get her to safety, because you see

that this square is turning
and there's a bit of railing,

but you're not both going to run back.

So you can either try for
a very difficult check

for both of you to leap off,

very difficult check,

or a slightly easier check to
get your daughter to safety.

- Oh, I'm going to wang
her up there, yeah.

- You can't just say "wang."

Yeah, you can, you can.

- I think they just did.

- Yeah, fair. Fair, fair, fair.

- You love it when I say "wang."

- Go ahead and give me...

Let's just make it an attack roll.

- 17.

- A 17.

You get down to your
daughter. You're holding on.

You can feel your claws shattering

under the weight of
holding two adult stoats up

as you're rapidly going
to a 90 degree angle,

trying to maintain balance,

and you know that your
option here is no longer

run up in the direction of your family

and get to safety as
this thing flips over.

In that final moment, you
push your daughter out.

You see her sail, slam against the wall

of this little tunnel you're in,

and then all of you lose sight of Ava

as everything spins and flips,

and I'm going to need the other map.

- The other map?
- The other map?

- You all scramble up and over,

and where you come to rest
staggers your imagination.

First and foremost, you feel,
with the exception of Tula,

who was thrown to the side,
let's go ahead and give you...

The dice love you, two
points of bludgeoning damage

as you slam against the
interior wall of this.

You feel the pads of your feet
and hands are all stinging

with the runnels of that
terrible water touching them.

The fur between your toes has singed away.

You seem to find yourself

inside some sort of arena,

standing seating that moves up.

There's a podium and pillars,
all of this dark, pitted rock,

cement all around you,
and you have that thought.

Stoats take over areas.
You've taken over warrens.

But this was built.

If this was a mega-warren
built for humans and by humans,

this place, at the scale of you people,

this was built by stoats,

and you've stumbled
across something amazing.

As you look around and take in that fact,

you realize that Ava is not with you,

and I'm going to need
Erika to leave the dome.

(players gasping)

- (silent) I love you.

- I love you, and I'm so sorry.

- (whisper) It's okay!
- (whisper) I didn't mean to!

I thought you were going
to be the fine one!

I thought you were going to be-

- It was stupid of me!
- No, it was good!

It was good for the story!

There is no sign of Ava,
and the water is still.

- Can I do a perception check?

- Sure.
- Can I look for her?

- Yeah, go ahead.

- Dirty 20.

- With a dirty 20, you just see,

as you look into the pool,
the Blue is almost blinding

in how much it's thrown up light and heat.

It's just settling down after
being so deeply disturbed,

and there is no sign.

- Mom?

- As we appear in this new space,

I cannot see my mother
anywhere, she is just gone.

Do I get a sense of, when she vanished,

is it that we were shunted away from her?

She was shunted away from us?

Or is it all so disorienting
that I have no idea

of what direction she might be in?

- I won't make you roll,
because a dirty 20 is enough

to sort of collaborate and
have extra information,

that she slipped down
as this was going under,

and then the sort of force
of this entire platform

pushing and turning, especially
with all of those pillars,

has pulled her under where you can't see.

- She's in the water
where we cannot see, okay.

I see Jaysohn is upset.

I mean, I already said,

I think my Divine Sense is
just for finding my kids.

- She's family, if you
want to do something.

- Yeah, I think I'll use
Divine Sense, if I can,

to see if I can just
sense where my mom is.

- What does it look like

as Tula reaches forward and out and under,

towards her family?

- My heart glows blue,

I draw my paws up to my chest,

and I think all of the color leaves.

My nose loses its moisture.

I think I just sort of dry up for a moment

and get very rigid and
still as blue light leaves

from my body to pulse out
like sonar into the space.

- That's exactly the analogy I would use,

because I think as all of that happens,

you feel Blue fill your
vision and then push out

through the walls, and
it pings and alights

on your kids and your sister
and your brother in law,

and then deep below, no longer moving,

your mother.

- But is she alive?

- I don't think I can
look my son in the eye

and answer that question.

I'm going to look at Thorn and my sister.

You have that blade of grass, right?

I'm going to just walk
over to you and say,

can you tie that around my midsection?

And I'm going to attempt-

- Mom, no!
- Wait, I...

Remembering how I moved the stone,

I can reach out like a
baby reaching for mother,

see if I can pull her out of the water.

- Just give me an intelligence check,

between the two of you,
because you have to coordinate.

You can't see it, so you're
kind of blind pulling.

You have a sense of where it is.

- Can I give my sister the help action

rather than going myself?
- [Aabria] Yeah, okay.

- I'm going to give you the help action.

- I go up to my sister and
I crook my arm around you

and lean into you.

- [Aabria] Let's make it arcana.
- Okay, arcana.

Don't fuck this up.

- Guidance!

d4.

I got a new cantrip.

- [Aabria] I'll always
respect a Guidance call.

(Brennan gasps)
- [Brennan] Four.

- That's still not very good. 10.

- With a 10, you reach down,

and you feel yourself
pulling towards something.

It's going to take some
time to pull this out,

because you are reaching with your power

into the source of your power,

so it's all a little staticky.

But you begin to pull,
and we'll come back.

It's going to take a
second to get that done.

Lila and Thorn, I need you to
give me a perception check.

Don't fall in!
- Oh, babe.

- Natural one? Amazing.

- 14.

- Lila, with a 14, you're sort
of watching all of this occur

but you're still, even in a moment

of great strain and stress, the
person you always have been,

ever alert, ever curious, ever aware,

and you begin to hear
the sound of movement,

echoing footsteps on metal,

as someone, someones, are approaching.

- I tell everybody. Say, someone's coming.

People are coming.

- I think we have to be
ready to talk or fight.

Maybe we should try and lead with...

How many does it sound like there are?

- I'm not going to make you roll again.

- [Izzy] Two plus?
- Yeah, two plus.

You're hearing a small
herd of people coming.

- A small herd.

- Okay, I think we need to be
ready. Stay focused on that.

- I'm going to look at my
children and say, okay.

Come, come. Come here.

And I'm going to beckon
for my kids to come.

I'm going to say, put
a hand on your auntie.

- Thorn will position himself in between

the family and the door.
- [Aabria] Okay.

- So he will be the first
thing that they see,

and can sort of react
or distract accordingly.

So wherever the door is,
I will be in between us.

- What you see, and it would
be just so deeply convenient

if Ava was here, because
she would recognize them...

- (whisper) No!

- Oh, so big!
- [Aabria] A figure steps in

behind the platform,
and drags in with them,

held by the scruff of her
neck, your friend Sybil.

- [Siobhan And Jasper] No, Sybil!
- [Aabria] They are massive.

Their faces, muzzles extended out,

that look a little more
wolf-like than stoat-like.

The elongating of them means
that there is more pink flesh

between their fur, and
you can see their skin.

They stand at twice your height,

you'd guess at three times your weight,

and they wear these
garments and look at you

with eyes that, only a
little bit, remind you

of the eyes of other stoats,

as if they are moving
towards being something else.

But you know, like you
know everything in here,

that these are the First Stoats,

and you know that they are

not pleased with you.

You see Sybil is sort of being dragged in

by this stoat in the
front, but isn't fighting.

The fight in her seems to
already sort of be out.

She's just being held
and looks out at you,

and just is shaking her head.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm
so sorry, I'm so sorry.

- Focus.

- Well, welcome.

The stoat in the front.

- I'm going to keep a hand on my sister

and just whisper very quickly,
keep concentrating on Mama.

And I'll look up and say,

Hello.

- What are you doing with Sybil?

- It's all right, sweetie.
- (whisper) Jaysohn, be quiet.

- You shouldn't be here.

- We understand. We're about to leave.

My mother's fallen into the water.

We're trying to recover her body.

- Unfortunately, the things that go in

don't always come back.

You might want to simply walk away.

- I understand. I know
how dangerous it is.

There is some sort of-
- Do you?

Do you know what you've stumbled into?

Explain it for me, because
I would love to know.

We would love to know why you're here.

Stop that.
(Rashawn hisses)

You actually see the one
with the little mitre on

is going to reach out with a hand.

- [Brennan] Can I make a-

- You feel something
sever in your connection

as a Counterspell removes your ability

to pull your mother out.

- Can I make an insight
check against the hat guy?

- [Aabria] Yeah, hat guy. Go for it.

- I float the hat off of him

and on, with my Mage Hand.

- That's a 14 insight
opposed by his deception.

I'm using my Empathic feat.

- Their. All of the First
Stoats use they/them pronouns.

- Okay.
- With a 14 on the die,

you can see that all of
them carry that heavy sense

of absolute competence and confidence

in and around the Blue.

They are all spellcasters.
- Okay.

- If I'm feeling like, whoa,

something crazy's happening to me,

new abilities!

- Okay, sure.

You're having a moment.

Continue as though that
is true. What's going on?

- I couldn't cast something.

- Sweet, do you, top of your intelligence,

Izzy Roland, want to cast
some magic right now?

- What if it's like, I can't control it?

It just comes out?

- Lila, you've got to do something!

- Asking you right now,
what do you want to do?

- Cast Fog Cloud?
- Yes!

- Okay, Izzy, I want you to
describe for me what it's like

as Lila reaches into the Blue

and pulls out magic.

- A monster just yelled at my mommy

and fucked with my auntie,

and my grandma is dead.

You know the first time
you're like, uh-oh,

I'm horny.

- I did not think that's
where we were going with this,

and I am way more invested, keep going.

- And you feel really scared

and powerful at the same time.

You're like, Ash Ketchum,

what is happening?

That, but rage happens.

- [Siobhan] You've gotta catch 'em all.

- And she starts vibrating with emotion,

and it just sort of...
(audible straining with power)

- And especially because
you are by far the smallest

in the group and you have rows of adults

interposing themselves between
you and these First Stoats,

they don't see you reach
out with that energy

for the first time, so
they don't know to stop it.

And then from the center of the pool,

a roiling, dark blue, choking fog

begins to bubble up and out and around,

and begins to obscure your view
of everyone and everything.

The stoats kind of look out and around.

Well.

You're going to have to explain

what you think you're doing here.

I love a parlor trick as
much as the next stoat,

but I think, in my opinion,

that you new stoats were led astray

by this one.

And Sybil is lifted into the air.

- That's the Director holding Sybil up?
- [Aabria] Yes.

- Can I make an insight check
opposed by his deception?

- Their. Yes.
- Their, sorry.

Make an insight check
opposed by their deception.

That's going to be a 25.

- What are you trying to figure out?

- I'm not trying to figure out anything.

The Empathic feat gives me the ability

to insight versus someone's deception,

and if my check succeeds, I
have advantage on attack rolls.

I would like to charge, jump,
and bite their throat out.

- Okay, you immediately take off at a run.

Make a luck check for me.

- 18.

- Okay.

There was a moment here of,

deal with an oncoming threat,

or make the point you were going to make,

and I think they thought it
was a little more important

before this fog makes
everything a little too obscure

for you to see the price of treason.

You all see it. You hear it.

Sybil's neck is snapped,
and the body's dropped,

and as you go in for a
lunge, let's roll initiative.

- Oh, this is bad.

- Tula, what'd you get?
- 16.

- 16. Jaysohn?
- 22.

- All right. Viola?
- Seven.

- Seven. Thorn?
- 18.

- All right, and Lila?
- 14.

- [Aabria] Perfect,
okay. Let's resolve this.

Because yeah, I want you to go ahead,

be over there as all of this happens.

Tula, you lunge forward,

I'm assuming for the Director's throat.

- [Brennan] Yeah.
- [Aabria] Okay.

- I have advantage on attack rolls,

so both of these are going
to be with advantage.

- Yep, yep.

- First attack, terrible. 10.
- Miss.

- Next attack is going to be a 26.

- Yeah, that absolutely hits.

- Come on, come on, come on!
- [Brennan] Okay.

- I think with that first one,

you go and dive for just center mass,

and you feel yourself clang against metal.

The Dictator is wearing metal
wrapped around their torso

in armor, so you move
upward toward soft flesh.

- 24 points of damage to the Director.

How much movement have
I expended to get here?

- [Aabria] I'm going to say 25.
- 25, okay.

I'm going to Rabbit Hop,

which negates attacks of opportunity,

just to be doubly safe,

and hide within the fog
at the base of the statue.

- Perfect, so yeah, you literally get in,

lunge at the Director,
miss on the first one.

The second one, you find fleshy purchase,

and as they reel back,

you slip down into the fog
so you're still obscured

and you just drop into shadow, beautiful.

First up is actually going to be Jaysohn.

Okay, I'm going to run in after my mum.

- [Aabria] Okay.

- So how do attacks work within the fog?

Do I roll just a regular attack,

because I know where this guy
is, or is it disadvantage?

- You're going to roll with disadvantage,

because you can't see inside the fog.

If it's as hard for them, it's
going to be hard for you too.

- Great, so I will attack the main guy

that just killed my girlfriend,
love of my life, my wife.

- [Aabria] Avenge your girlfriend!

- [Siobhan] That's 6 plus 8, 14.

- With a 14, you jump in and
you feel yourself make contact.

Utterly unfazed.
- Okay, great.

Then I will attack again.

That misses. I will bonus action...

Flurry of the Wind, you have
to have already hit, right?

- No, it's just after you
take the attack action.

- Okay, great, then I
will Flurry of Blows.

Okay, there we go. That's a 23.

- 23 hits.

- Great, I will use sneak attack on that,

and I will also do Stunning Strike.

- [Aabria] Okay.

- So it's a DC 16 strength saving throw.

- Strength save?
- I believe, right?

- Yeah, they make the save.

- They make the save, but they still take

18 plus 5 points of damage,
so 23 points of damage.

- Yes!

- And then because it's Flurry
of Blows, I attack again.

- [Aabria] Yep.

- And that is a critical failure.

- Oof, okay.

- Can I move to be next to the bishop guy,

or where I believe the bishop guy to be?

- [Aabria] Yeah, sure sure sure.

To get all the way over here?

- Yeah.
- Down on the ground? Sure.

Well, coincidentally, my
little stoat pope is up next.

As you drop down in front of
them, they look out and go,

poor choice, so sorry.

And reach not towards you, but up,

and cast Dispel Magic to remove the fog.

We didn't want to do this.

We are just doing what's
best for everyone.

And then looks up and away from you,

and that's the end of their turn.

Next up is Thorn.

- Okay, I'm really worried
about Stoat Pope, but also,

the main guy just killed
Sybil and has taken damage?

- [Aabria] Yes, an
aggressive amount of damage.

- An aggressive amount
of damage. Okay, good.

Okay, fine, I will move
up and in the grill

of the main, this guy here.

I'm going to, as a bonus action,

cast Zephyr Strike on myself,

and I'm going to use it right now.

- The moment you begin to cast magic,

you see the stoat wearing
a gas mask reaches out

and you feel almost as if the wind

is sucked out of your lungs.

The spell takes no effect.

- Okay.

Well, I'm still going to attack twice

using my claws.

That is a 17.

- Misses.

- God, these guys are really bad.

- This is bad, guys.

- [Siobhan] This is really bad!
- This is really bad.

♪ This is maybe one of those ones ♪

♪ That's unwinnable on purpose ♪

- Y'all just pushed 47 points of damage

into my main guy who hasn't gone yet.

I think you're doing
better than you think.

Not to metagame, but y'all
didn't rock up and do nothing.

I just gave one armor.
- I feel like I did nothing.

- I would just clarify, I
did rock up and do nothing.

- [Aabria] Oh no!
- I miss again.

I should've, yeah, okay, it's cool.

Yeah, that's me. That's my
bonus action and my action.

All done, nothing works.
- Oh no!

Okay, and the thing that happens now,

you see Dictator

looks down and around at you,

the three of you that have
run forward, and goes,

this isn't my fight.

Let's make it a little more interesting.

And the hatch that they
came through, still open,

you see one massive paw-

- No!
- What?

- [Aabria] As something
turns and crawls through.

- Honestly, thank god.

- [Siobhan] You just said
we were doing better!

- Yeah!
- You said we were doing good!

- It's kind of a thing
of me explaining that

so when I do what I do next-
- This is on you.

Yesterday, what did you say to Aabria?

- [Aabria] It makes sense and
it's fine. What did I say?

- There was just one guy
in there, that was easy!

- [Aabria] Y'all talked a
lot of shit about my one guy.

- [Jasper] That's exactly
what you said yesterday.

- He was easy! What the fuck?

That's a literal wolf!

- [Jasper] That's an actual wolf!
- [Siobhan] Are you kidding me?

- And this wolf looks ferocious,

just pouring slaver that's
sort of bubbly and frothy

but still glowing with that Blue.

Its ears are low, its tail tucked.

It's not at the right
scale to be comfortable,

like a dog trying to run down stairs.

It's uncomfortable,
and in that discomfort,

is swinging around and growling
and moves into the fray.

Next up is Tula.

- This is so bad!

- Well, shit.

- [Jasper] Agreed!
- [Aabria] A little pup pup.

- With the fog cloud gone-
- [Aabria] Yes.

- If I look down into the water,

can I see my mother's body from here?

- Give me an arcana check.

- That's not going to go well.

12.

- I normally don't do this.

- Love whatever this energy is.

- [Jasper] Secrets!
- Geez!

(Brennan screaming)
- [Siobhan] What the fuck?

- I'm sorry! I want to take it back!

- That's why she normally doesn't do it.

- Gotcha, cool.

- I'm so sorry I just
punched you in the face

trying to tell you information.

- I had it coming.
- No!

- I look at these First Stoats,

who have put themselves as the
leaders of this great family,

and they are all fools,

because parents never
put themselves first.

I'm going to look at Sybil,

and I'm going to say, sweetie, wake up!

And I'm going to cast Healing
Word for the first time.

- [Aabria] As it hits, the
violent un-breaking of her neck

sort of throws her limp body over,

and she lands at your feet.

Then you see she kind
of shakes herself out,

and for the second time,

you have brought her back from the brink.

(Aabria gasping)
- Shut up, shut up!

- We have to go.
- What do you mean, shut up?

- Eight hit points
healed with Healing Word.

- Thank you, thank you!

- I'm going to leap up onto the podium

and go for the Director more.

- Okay!

- Swinging twice, regular
attacks, on this dude.

There's no shenanigans where
I can stand on the podium

and jump on their head to
get advantage, is there?

(Aabria coughs and laughs)

You know, let's not do
that. Let's just attack.

- [Aabria] I love when you roll.
- Bite their brain out.

- I'm going to bite their brain out.

- [Aabria] Sure, sure, sure.

- Alright, here we go. Two attacks coming in.

Okay. (chortles) So bad.

One is a nat one and
the other one is a 13.

- They both miss.

Where do you want to sort of have ended up

by the end of this?
- I'll get on the-

- Also, you could just move your guy.

- [Brennan] Yeah, I'll get on the corner

on the other side of Thorn over here.

- Cool, cool, cool.

Good, your wish is my command.

Is that you?
- That is me.

- Okay, well then, next with a 15,

Ava, come on back.

- Yay!
(players cheering)

- Ava, you crawl back out.
- [Izzy] Please be level 20.

- Yes!
- All of you see

her eyes glow with the same Blue.

- I muscle up. (grunting)

- [Siobhan] (whisper) So strong!
- And then I jump up

on the lectern and I go,
I'm too stubborn to die!

- [Izzy] Gets killed again.

- And in Rage, I take a swing

at this one right here.

- [Aabria] Which one?
- [Jasper] The Director?

- [Erika] I hop up on the lectern

and I take a swing, recklessly attacking.

- Sure, sure, sure.
- Yes.

All right, well, that's a 17.

- Just misses.
- First attack.

Second attack. Ooh!

That's a 19 plus 7, 26.

- Absolutely hits.

- 19 points of damage to this one.
- Perfect.

- And I also say, come here, you!

And I grapple them,

so they have to make a check for 15.

Did they make it?

- Yeah.
- All right, okay.

Well, I still add on an extra d8 to my...

Another six damage to them, at least.

- They look over and say,
you say come here? My turn.

Is going to reach out and grab you.

I need you to make an
acrobatics or athletics check.

- Since it's a strength check,
I'm rolling with advantage,

which is still a-

- I need you to know,

I did get a 17 on the die,
so you've got to beat a 26.

- [Siobhan] Shit.
- Oh my god.

- This guy is strong.

- [Erika] 16...

- Jaysohn can't help but respect it.

- Like a little bit. He's
got a little Joseph Stalin-

- I get a horrifying mom sense of,

my young son is being
attracted to a fascist!

It's not cool to be strong!
Don't get wrapped up in that!

- They've got a little Stalin
mustache. What's not to love?

- That is a 16.

- You are absolutely
snatched around the neck

and you see this massive
creature is going to take you,

both hands, and suplex you back.

(Jasper groans sympathetically)

Does a 19 hit?

- Yes, it does.
- Figured.

You're going to take 21
points of bludgeoning damage

as you are slammed into the cement.

- I'm going to take half of
that, because I'm raging.

- As they stand back up,
they just put their foot

over your throat and hold you down.

End of the turn, the wolf's going to go.

- Oh boy.

- Wolf is going to lunge across

and aim for the people who
haven't joined the fight yet,

because that's too cluttered.

It's going to move across and
snap down with a multi-attack.

First bite at Lila,

for a natural 20.

- [Izzy] Bye bye.

- [Aabria] Second bite,
Viola, for a 21. Does 21 hit?

- Yeah.
- Okay.

12 points of piercing damage
as the wolf bites you,

but does not, sort of bites and releases.

And then for Viola, eight
points of piercing damage.

Okay, that's the wolf's go,

and now we are at Lila, you're up.

- Okay, my aunt's right
next to me. Jesus Christ.

- [Viola] Don't even worry about me.
- No no no, that's good.

Okay, first off, bonus action, Bladesong.

- Okay.

- And I'm within five feet of an ally.

- [Aabria] You are.

- So I'm going to sneak
attack, Primal Savage,

the wolf.

- [Aabria] Okay, go ahead.
- Hopefully under the neck,

so it's sort of like
if it tries to get me,

it's like... (vocalizes
missed bite attempts)

- [Aabria] Go ahead and
make an attack roll. - Nice.

- Oh, I don't know which die I rolled.

- That's real as hell, TBH.

- (gasps) Ooh! 25.

- 25 absolutely hits.

- Yay!

- That's my sister!

- Okay, so 3d6 and 2d10.

- [Aabria] Yep.
- Plus dex mod.

- (whisper) Plus dex mod. Thanks, babe.

- You call your mom babe? I
don't understand white people.

- Yeah, that's some white
people shit right there.

- Okay, assistance.
- Sure.

- One.
- Yep.

- Two.
- [Aabria] Three.

- Five.
- [Aabria And Siobhan] Eight.

- Five.
- [Aabria And Siobhan] 13.

- Seven.
- 20.

- Plus?
- [Siobhan] Plus five.

- Dex mod.
- Three.

- 23. You do 23 points of
damage as you reach up.

Do you feel like this is
more bite or more claw?

- Bite.

- Yeah, as you bite up into
its neck and you pull down,

I think the most upsetting thing

is how easily the flesh gives way.

You chomp up and rip down,

and you are sort of
showered in gore as you hit.

Both Viola and Lila, you're
going to take five points,

and you're going to take
four points of acid damage.

- [Siobhan] Oh my god.
- As you have

a bunch of irradiated
blood scattering over you.

- The wolf is made of acid!
The wolf is made of acid!

- What does it taste like?
What does it taste like?

- Bad!
- Oh no, I wanted to taste it!

- Have you ever had Pop Rocks and Warheads

in your mouth at the same time?

- No, but now I want to.

- Yeah, we all gotta get
high and go to 7-Eleven.

We could make some dreams happen.

Do you have anything else you want to do?

That was your action and bonus action.

- I don't think so.
- Okay, with that,

my wolf goes again with
a legendary action,

and understanding and seeing
sort of, oh, too weak there,

the thing I hit, I didn't hit hard enough,

is going to evolve.

- Charizard.

- [Aabria] And from the wound
that you just ripped open-

- What the fuck?
- A new claw shows up.

- No!
- [Jasper] What?

- [Siobhan] Narsty!
- I want you all to know,

the wolf's multi-attack
now has a third attack.

- I'm gonna bite its dick off.

- The stoat standing behind the Dictator

sort of steps a little
forward and reaches out

and sort of through your
minds, you all hear their name.

(echoes) Speaker.

And I need everyone here to
make a wisdom saving throw.

The DC is 14.

- Add plus two, because you're near me.

- People, Thorn, Jaysohn,
and Mom, plus one from me.

- Doesn't matter for me,
because I rolled a one.

- Natural one as well.

- The kids are so synced
up, it's so stinking cute.

- Wisdom, right?

- Wisdom, yeah.
- Nine.

- I have such good fucking wisdom.

- Yeah, what's going on, bud?

- All of these saving throws,
I have rolled like dog shit.

Wolf shit.
- 21.

- 21. Thorn?

- 14 plus-
- [Aabria] You made it. Ava?

- 19.
- [Aabria] 19.

- I am immobilized, correct?

- You're restrained, or grappled.

It's slightly different. Capital G.

- [Siobhan] You can still hit.
- Yeah, you can still hit.

- Okay, well in that case,
that stoat behind me,

I'm like, all this Blue
stuff is so irregular!

And I use my reaction to melee
attack them with Mage Slayer.

- Nice.

- Yeah, you're within.
- Yep.

That's a...

23.

- Hits.
- Yes, excellent, excellent.

- [Aabria] We love a Mage Slayer.

- Mage Slayer absolutely rules.

- It's so good.

- There are a couple feats
that you're just like,

you guys are really
showing your favoritism.

- 100%.

- Mage Slayer is so fucking-
- [Aabria] It's so fucking cool.

- 13 points of damage, and they must roll

to keep their concentration
with disadvantage.

- Copy that.

Unfortch, as they take this hit

and cast out this fear to the group,

Lila, Jaysohn, and Viola,

Speaker sends you a pulse of fear,

and the fear is shaped
like your grandmother Ava's

lifeless body in front of Speaker,

just a little nasty,
because you did a hit.

- Can I ask the Speaker to roll

a wisdom saving throw, please?
- Sure.

- I'm going to use my reaction.

I've talked so much
crap about this ability,

and I can't believe I'm actually using it.

- Speaker only gets an 11.

- Okay, the Speaker is frightened of me.

- Shut up!

- When I see a creature
within 120 feet of me

succeed on a save against
being charmed or frightened,

I can make the caster
charmed or frightened of me

for the next minute.
- Love it.

- So I'm going to poke
my head around the side,

seeing this happen, and I'm going to,

as they send me, "Speaker," and I succeed,

I send back, "Thorn!"

And then they see in their minds,

the Last Bast just
crumbling into the ground

as humans start ripping it to pieces.

- Amazing.
- [Jasper] They're frightened of me.

- The first time in the
history of this game

this power has worked.
- Yeah!

- Let's go!

- The prerequisites are so impossibly-

- It's so specific!

- Getting this off, what has to align?

- So this person reaches out
and is like, you must fear me.

And Grandma goes, you stop that!

Then Thorn goes, yes, you should fear us!

Stop that!

- We're all scared of each other!

- (Bane impression) You
merely adopted the Blue.

- Our grandma's dead and
alive at the same time!

- I was born in it.

- It's like the best and
worst of both worlds!

- And I bet all of her
strawberries are wet.

- No! Viola, you're up.
- [Izzy] Or they're awesome.

- All righty, so Viola, the
last thing that she recalled

was reaching out for her
mother into the drink

and that power being cut
off, so I don't even think

I've turned around because I'm so like,

oh my god, everything's
terrible, she fell in!

- Into the drink?
- [Rashawn] The water.

- Into the drink. We use
sassy sailor terms here.

- With that, I am going
to use my Channel Divinity

and use Sacred Weapon to
give my blade of grass

a plus two to its attack.

I'm rubbing my belly like,
you killed my mother,

and I'm realizing, I've probably got

a kick or something for the first time.

- Aw!
- Oh shit, okay,

so I've got my sword, it's beefed up,

and I'm so pissed, and I'm
going to use my rabbit hop

and jump 10 feet into the air,

hopefully above this wolf's head,

and I want to strike down with the blade.

- [Aabria] Yeah!
- In its rigid form.

I get to attack twice.
- Let's go!

- Let's go!

- [Siobhan] I love my aunt!
- [Aabria] Your family is cool.

- It'll be a plus eight to this roll.

6 plus 8.

14.
- Hits.

- Cool.
- Just hits, for what it's worth.

- Nat one on the second
one, but that's fine.

Okay, so 1d8.

- You can throw smites on that as well.

- Okay, yes, then I will throw a-

- Put a smite on it.
- [Jasper] Put a little smite on it.

- [Izzy] ♪ Put a smite on your grass ♪
- Divine smite on them.

♪ Whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do ♪

- 13 points of damage.

- Give me a luck check, Viola.

- Okay.

Come on, purple. Come on, purple.

- Come on, purple. Come on, purple.

- 15.
- Yeah!

- You saw down into the wolf's neck,

and as you kind of pull your blade back,

you see this rigid blade
of grass is suddenly

a little longer, a little
more jagged at the edge,

and at your sort of
looking and inspecting it,

just a little bit of dew,
poisonous and terrible,

as your weapon is transformed,
and in that reverie,

you look down and you see,
you sawed a jagged neck wound

into this wolf as its head detaches.

- No!
- What?

- [Aabria] And in rapid succession,

something new and worse forms.
- No!

It's a fucking hydra wolf!

- [Izzy] ♪ Everybody say bye to Lila ♪

- [Aabria] Welcome, everyone,
to the Wolf of Theseus.

- I feel like Viola is just
going to straddle this thing,

try to clench it with the thighs.

- [Aabria] Interesting.
- I'm on this thing.

- The wolf is like, I don't
know how to evolve past this.

Excuse me!

- Surprise, the wolf is a sub.

- I mean, that makes sense.
It's not the alpha in the pack.

- No, that's a Rashawn's show, baby.

- [Aabria] That was rad as shit.
- [Siobhan] That was really cool.

That was really rad.
- Now you have poison grass.

Look at my little girl
underneath that big, scary-

- It's fine. You're doing so good.

And the smallest of the First Stoats,

you know, balance, we're
doing it, comes forward,

and sort of through your
minds, through the Blue,

you know their name to be Silence.

You just hear a guttural sort of echo

inside of the mask over their face

as they begin to cast a spell,

and I need everyone once again

to make a wisdom saving throw.

- Yikes.

- You have to beat a 16.

- 10.

- Is this charmed or frightened as well?

- [Aabria] No.

- Did I get Jasper's fucking box?

- [Aabria] Oh no!
- Maybe, maybe.

- All right, raise your hand
if you did not make the save.

- [Izzy] Which one was it?
- [Jasper] What was the DC?

- 16.
- Oh.

- All four of you...

Well, three of you feel your
heartbeat suddenly slow down

as you are under the
effects of the Slow spell.

Your speed's halved, you
have a negative two penalty

to AC and dex saves, and
you cannot use reactions.

(whisper) Hey, Ava? You're
not doing great right now.

You just feel the emptiness
within you stretch out.

All right, we are back
up to the top again.

- We're still in this,
y'all. Please don't give up.

- You're doing great! Sweeties,
I'm so, so proud of you.

Jaysohn, you're up first.

- So I'm under the fear condition.

Does that mean I have to run away?

- No, you just can't-

- [Siobhan] I just can't
get closer to that guy.

- Correct.

- But I can still hit
the guy in front of me.

- [Aabria] Yeah, absolutely.

- Great, well, I'll try and
hit the guy in front of me

two times, because I still
have my two attacks, right?

- You still have your two attacks.

Sorry, I didn't finish saying it.

On your turn you can either use

an action or a bonus action, not both.

- Great, well, I will do the
two attacks against this guy.

- No, not my little pope!

- One of them is a fucking nat one.

I've gotten three nat
ones so far this episode.

- [Izzy] Throw the tray away!
- Give me the bad one.

- [Jasper] Throw the tray away!
- All of these are bad!

- Hey guys, we're trying
to do something here.

I appreciate that you're on my
side, but fucking lock it up!

- The other one is a 24.
- [Aabria] Oh yeah, absolutely hits.

- So with that, I will
hit, use my sneak attack,

and once again try and do Stunning Strike.

- Yeah, let's go.
- [Jasper] Let's go!

- So that is nine plus six

is 15,

plus another 6 is 21,

plus 5 is 26 damage.

- Jiminy Christmas! Sorry
for my language, guys.

- [Siobhan] How dare you?
- [Aabria] You said 26?

- And then DC 16 strength
saving throw or be stunned.

- So the thing is, little stoat pope,

no one thinks a pope is going
to be incredibly strong.

He didn't roll great, so
yeah, a little stunned.

- He's stunned? Yes, yes, yes!
(players cheering)

Hit that guy, he can't hit you back!

- Amazing, do you want to do
anything with your movement?

Especially now that you know

there's no opportunity
attack coming your way.

- I'm more than 20 feet away
from the wolf. I will just...

And I don't have any bonus actions.

I don't think that there's any
point in me moving, really.

- Next up was going to be my stoat pope,

but stunned, cannot do anything fun.

I hate it. How long does stunned last?

- Until the end of my next turn.

- You never let me have fun.

- What are you talking about?

You killed my grandma and
then brought her back to life!

- I brought her back!
- This wolf is terrifying!

- I brought her back, she's very cool.

- Look at how small my sister is!

- [Rashawn] The infighting.
- You wanted to be kids!

This doesn't feel like my problem!

- [Jasper] It's definitely not on me.

- I think you're being very
unfair to me specifically.

Thorn, you are up.

- I have no bonus action because I failed,

so I am just going to take two attacks

on the Director, Dictator.

- [Aabria] Okay.
- Dude.

Oh, come on!

That's not going to hit, that's a 14.

Second attack.

- [Siobhan] Oh my god!
- Yep, I have nothing.

- Hey bud, you got a little
inspiration you want to burn?

- I don't have an inspiration.
- Shit.

- Yep.
- Honey, I felt them kick!

- What? (screams)

- Hey, let me be very clear.

That will never work a second time,

but was so raggedy, I will allow it.

You can reroll one of your attacks.

That was sad. Your dice are all being bad.

- Yeah, this is... (screams)
(players cheering)

That wasn't a nat 20, just to be clear.

- [Aabria] I know, we're
just cheering for mediocrity

from your dice at this point.

- That was an 18, to be fair.
- Sure, an 18 just hits.

- Okay, so this will be Favored
Foe and Dreadful Strikes.

plus these two.

That is 9, 16,

23 points of damage.

- Okay.
- To the Director,

as I carve into this dude.

- I want to do something here
before what happens happens.

I want you to make a check. I
think it's got to be survival.

- Okay.
- Oh shit.

- That is 15.

- With a 15, you see, as you
are about to land this blow,

that the Director's
eyes, seeing you coming,

flick out towards the wolf,

and I think you understand
something very important.

That this wolf is acting under orders,

and the Director, who's
not looking very good,

once down, this wolf
will not have a master.

- Uh-huh. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- If you want, you can redirect
this blow with a luck check,

or you can finish the Director off,

because 23 points of damage will do it.

What do you do?

- I'm going to sweep the
legs of the Director.

I'm going to sink my
claws into their face,

and then as I do, I'm not
actually going to do anything

with this because obviously I don't have

a bonus action or anything like that,

but I'm going to just start
forming words in my mouth.

but I'm going to just start
forming words in my mouth.

You can hear the sounds,

which sound almost exactly
like the Director's voice.

- You claw in and you feel the blood

under your hands begin to slow.

They grab you and pull
you incredibly close,

their mouth to your ear, and say,

they are coming.

Good luck.

And they die.

- What did they say, Thorn?

What did they say? I was right there.

- I'll take them off the board.

Next up, my sweet little wolf,

who, untethered from the
directions being fed to them

by the Director,

will simply do what they know best to do.

Three attacks, and unfortunately,

because Viola is on his
back and he can't see it,

they will all be directed down at Lila.

- Shit.
- Okay, what's your AC now?

- 23.
- Okay, good to know.

- Nice, good job.

- First attack with the claw misses.

Second attack with the mouth misses.

Third attack was exactly
a 23. It's going to hit.

So that little claw is
going to reach down.

It's going to do 17
points of piercing damage,

and I need you to make a
constitution saving throw.

- I have plus three on con saves.

- Plus two.

- So I have plus five?
- Mm-hm.

- Okay, and I'm making a
constitution saving throw.

- [Aabria] Yes. The DC is 15.
- The DC is 15.

- [Siobhan] So you've got to get a 10.

- Cocked!

- You just looked at me like
you got away with something.

- 11.

- So you feel this claw strike
you, and then it adjusts,

and the thumb pushes over
and then pushes into you.

You take 21 points of poison damage.

- I have two hit points.
- [Aabria] You're still up?

- I have two hit points.
- [Aabria] (whisper) Good job.

That is the wolf's turn. Next up is Tula.

- I see that the stoat pope is stunned.

- [Aabria] Yep.
- There's an easy opportunity

to try to get some advantage
on some smites there.

But I look at this massive
wolf who keeps getting hurt

and growing more dangerous
the more it gets hurt,

and I think I'm going to run over,

I'm going to bonus
action Emissary of Peace.

I would like to run over,
get in front of my daughter,

and yell, "Run!" at you.

If I could make a persuasion check

with a use of Lay on Hands,

I would like to Lay on Hands on the wolf.

- Interesting.

Does the wolf understand stoatal language?

- It stoatally could.
- Stop that.

All right, I like a pun. Sure.

Go ahead. I'm going to roll for your DC.

14.

What's the little Lay on Hands do?

How many Lay on Hands do
you put on my little baby?

- There's two things I'm
trying to do with Lay on Hands.

One is heal it, and the other is give it

the sensation that we are not danger.

- There's a lot of damage
that's been punched in

by your family members, including
the one riding its back.

- Yeah.
- Also, I'm going to allow

for this to work like a persuasion check,

but I am going to make you
roll animal handling instead.

- Copy that, if I sense
that, in that case,

can I not use Emissary of Peace?

- Yeah, you can save that,
if you want to keep it.

- [Brennan] I'll save that.
- Sure, sure, sure.

- I'll come over, Lay on Hands,

and try to make an animal handling check.

- Yeah, how many points of
Lay on Hands do you use?

It doesn't have to be a tremendous amount,

but a decent show will convince it

that in a world where
everything is meant to harm it,

there is something that
is not trying to hurt it.

- I will put the most possible.

- Most possible?
- Most possible.

- All right, it's got 36
points of damage on it,

if you want to go all the way up to that.

- I can throw 26 down before I'm out.

- You're going to put 26...

All of it?

- That's all of my Lay on Hands.

- I'll give you advantage,
and the DC is lower.

- Mother, I have two hit points.

- One more than you need.

- The only hit point that matters

is the last one, we all know that.

- 16.

- You tell me what it looks like

as Tula once again shows kindness

in the face of danger and destruction

and chooses peace.

I know you didn't use Emissary of Peace,

but we know what you are.

What does it look like?

- I run up, seeing Lila and Viola.

I'm going to look at both
of you and just go, run,

and I'm going to touch the wolf,

pour as much healing into it as I can.

I'm just going to start going,
shh shh shh shh shh shh shh,

and trying to calm it down.

- You see that this wolf
recoils away at first

from the Blue, having a very strong

and deeply negative association with it,

and not going to make you
roll history or insight,

I think in this moment you
understand, your mind goes back

to the wolf skull at
the bottom of the pool.

This is the one that survived,

and there have been other efforts made

to make and exploit animals
that could be used as weapons

in the fight for the humans to come,

and this is one that
lived and has figured out

via this rapid evolution, this disregard

for its own form and
structure, to survive.

Its head leans down and nuzzles.

I'm so sorry. The neck is
quite meaty and very wet.

The opposite of your mom.

Nuzzles in, but at the same
time, I'm going to say yeah,

it knows that you are
a friend and it knows

that the stoats with you right
now, it saw the interaction

as you told your daughter
and your sister to run.

These are friends, but it
still knows it was brought here

to fight, so it's still going to evolve.

(players gasping)

- Oh no!

- [Aabria] As this wraps up, and Viola,

it wraps around you and
gently moves you down

next to your sister and your niece,

who start doing patty-cake.

- My soul just left my body.

I was like, no!

- My babies!
- [Aabria] It comes back up to standing,

still looking at you.

- I'm just touching it.

I'm fully weeping.

I think I'm having a
big memory of the bear,

which is probably not the
thing I'm really remembering.

The bear has become a stand-in

for all the other things I'm remembering,

but I'm just going, we're not
going to let them hurt you.

- Amazing, okay, incredible.

- So kind.

- Yeah, the radical change that
can happen when you are kind

in the face of doom can
change the battlefield.

I think in this moment,

Sybil, who is too stunned by anything

to sort of watch anything
happen, looks up,

sees you all fighting, and
is going to make eye contact.

I think Jaysohn is the closest.

- Yes!
- Having just stunned

the stoat pope, you make
eye contact with her.

Oh my god, are you okay?

- Are you okay?
- No, I think I died.

- You died! It was so cool!
- Was it cool?

- It was so cool!
- Thank you.

- My mom brought you back!
- That's twice!

What do I do? What do you want me to do?

- Hit someone!
- That one?

- Yes! Hit this one, hit
the one with the stupid hat!

- Yeah, sure.

- Five hit points with
my bonus action to Lila.

Healing Word. Sorry, that's it.

- Nice, good call, good call, good call.

Go ahead and take that.

Sybil, unarmed, deeply
wounded, not doing great,

but understands easy meat,

is going to come alongside Jaysohn.

She gives you a little nod
and is going to attack.

- And he's stunned, so.

- I mean, she's not doing great right now.

I can't believe I rolled
that low. That's not good.

- With advantage? He's stunned.

- (whisper) I just rolled a two twice.

- Welcome to the freaking table, my guy.

- [Jasper] This is what happens.

- This is how we've been rolling.

Rashawn rolled two threes
on advantage earlier.

- This little, here, has been bad.

- We're infectious, I think.
- Oh no!

- We have whatever COVID-22
is. You just roll very badly.

- She flies in and goes to land a blow.

Absolutely.

This thing is meaty, it can't move.

They are stuck in place,
and yet just, you know,

the trauma of dying and coming back,

so in lieu of that, she
going to say, I'll help you!

- You're really good.

- In lieu of taking any other action,

is going to provide you the help action

so you'll have advantage
for the next things you do,

because she's not good on her own.

Ava's up.

- Fuck 'em up, Grandma!

- So I'm slowed by this one?
- Yes.

- Okay, so I'm going to
do a little Rabbit Hop

all the way onto there,
two-handing it. (hollers)

- You can't Rabbit Hop,
because it's a bonus action,

and you can only do one or the other.

- That's true. Well, I just
vertically leap into the air.

- I jump normally!

- [Aabria] You have
exactly enough movement

to pull that off.
- All right.

- I'm normal!
- Let's see here.

- I swear!

- 13.
- [Aabria] Just misses.

- Shit. Yeah.
- [Jasper] Welcome to this side of the table.

- [Siobhan] Welcome.
- And because I am slowed,

I can't really do anything.

- Don't you have a second attack?

- I do, but I believe you cannot do

a second attack with Slow.

- No, it's part of the same action.

- You can either do an
action or a bonus action.

- [Erika] I see, I see, I see.
- Come on, big mama. Come on.

- All right, here we go.

Yes!
- Yay, Grandma!

- Okay, that's a 23! (screams)

All right, I'm going to...

I should set aside the dice
that I need to use. Dammit!

- [Rashawn] Why aren't these labeled?
- [Aabria] Who could say?

Yes-suh! Yas-suh!

- Your eyesight's good as
hell. I cannot see that.

- 21 points of necrotic
damage to that one.

- That's my mama, that's my mama!

- Yes, and then probably-

- Let me go ahead and make
the concentration check.

What have you done to my dice?

With a four on the dice,
everyone under the effect of Slow

feels themselves pull up to full speed.

Jaysohn is so fast! He's so fast!

- Losing concentration
happens instantaneously

in the action economy, so
I think you do actually-

- Yep!
- [Brennan] There you go.

- That's true!

- [Siobhan] Uh-oh,
nothing in the rule book!

- Taking damage, I need you to make

a dexterity saving throw.

- Oh, me?
- [Aabria] Yep.

- I believe that I have
advantage on those.

18. That's an 18.

- Yep, you make the save, but
you are still going to take

nine points of fire damage
as you are Hellishly Rebuked.

- That's fine, I'm fine.

- (faintly) Grandma!

- Don't you worry about me.

- [Siobhan] Grandma's eyebrows are gone!
- [Brennan] Grandma's on fire!

- [Aabria] Truly, the
least of Grandma's worries.

- And now I'm on fire,

and I go up to this one.

I go (growls) and make a Menacing Attack,

so you must beat a wisdom
saving throw of 15.

- Okay.

Fail.
- Yes!

They're afraid of me now. (growls)

You leave my family alone!

- They say nothing, and simply stare.

The mask over their face
hides any sort of reaction.

You feel in your gut

that your intimidation lands,

but it's deeply impassive,

maybe just a little rocking of
body weight onto a back foot.

- You know, I've never thought

that the strong and silent treatment

is ever going to intimidate me.

In fact, I just feel like I
can fill all of that silence.

Nothing will ever let me
be alone with my thoughts!

You don't scare me!

- I love that so much. You know what?

As you're ranting, you actually
see Silence reaches up,

pulls off the mask, and you see

that their lower jaw and tongue are gone.

Their silence is not a choice.

Just a raspy... (wheezes)

- What's the matter, cat got your tongue?

- We are leaving. This place is bad.

- [Aabria] Perfect, anything else?

- That's all. I did my bonus action.

- [Aabria] Hell yeah, that's so scary.

My Director's dead. Lila, you're up.

- Interesting.
- [Aabria] So interesting.

- Fuck 'em up, Lila.

- Okay, Lila's going to
give a little scratch

to the wolf.

Hi.

I have plus 10 feet to my speed,

and if I bonus action dash,

I believe I can make it over there.

- What's your total speed?
What's your speed normally?

- With Bladesong, it's 40.

- Yeah, there you go. You
can absolutely make it.

- And then if I'm right
next to my brother-

- [Aabria] Yeah, do you want to be

on the left or right of your brother?

- [Izzy] I'll be in
between Sybil and Jaysohn.

- [Aabria] Aw, it's
our little young squad.

- No, I want to be next to Sybil!

- Sorry.
- [Siobhan] I want to be next to Sybil!

- Hi, Sybil!
- [Siobhan] I want to be next to Sybil!

- [Aabria] Sybil's going to
slide over and just be like,

oh, I'm so sorry, you can be right here.

- [Erika] You can both be next to Sybil.

- I died!

And then goes back into NPC neutral pose.

- [Jasper] Stock animation.
- I died again!

- I will sneak attack.
- [Rashawn] Ouch!

- Primal Savagery.
- [Aabria] Sure, sure, sure.

- Stoat Pope.
- Sure, sure, sure.

- And advantage, because they're stunned.

- Advantage.
- [Brennan] They are stun-ned.

- Check which dice you're using.

- [Rashawn] ♪ Stunting. Pretty ♪

- ♪ You're the chick from New York City. ♪

- 23.
- [Aabria] 23 hits.

You hit the pope who,
again, wearing a miter.

They're not wearing armor.
- [Rashawn] Get up off of that hat!

- Three, four.
- Seven.

- Five.
- 12.

- Six.
- 18.

- Eight.
- 26, plus your dex mod.

- Plus three.
- 29. Insane.

- [Aabria] Beautiful.
- Yes, honey, yes.

- Silent mama.
- We always say quiet coyote.

- Quiet coyote!
- Or shut up walrus.

- What does it look
like as Lila comes over

and absolutely rips this things apart?

They are still up.
- Oh, okay.

- Sometimes you've got to shut
up walrus. Hey, quiet coyote.

If I have to do shut up
walrus, you're in trouble.

- Shut up walrus! Sorry, I
came in on the end of that.

- No recess.
- Coyote politely going, shh.

And a walrus going, if you
don't fucking quiet down!

- I think Lila's at the
point where it's like,

my whole family might
die, and you know what?

If we all go, that's
the best case scenario

for anyone dying, so she's
got seven hit points,

and before she goes over,
she's like, I love you, Mommy.

- [Aabria] Aw!

- I love you, sweetie. Great job.

(Izzy snarling rabidly)

- And then, I think, goes
for whatever this is.

- Oh yes, the disgusting lump.
- [Aabria] Its back?

- [Izzy] There's a big ol' lump.
- [Aabria] It's a hunchback.

- [Izzy] Yeah.

- [Aabria] Yeah, okay. You
attack it in the spine meat.

They, still stunned, are
screaming and only falteringly

They, still stunned, are
screaming and only falteringly

shouting through
Jaysohn's horrifying stun.

- The Hunchback of Stoatre Dame.

I'm sorry, I had to say
it. I just had to say it.

- Whoa!

- That's how you get inspiration baby.

That's how you get that.

- Then I think I want to
look at Sybil and be like,

what do we do if we kill all of them?

- I don't know.

Someone has to lead us.
The humans are coming back.

I mean, I appreciate if all
of this sort of happened

because the Director killed
me, but what's your plan here?

- Oh, I don't know.

My mom just started attacking one of them.

- Why did your mom attack?
- I don't know.

- Okay, what is happening?
- Were they bad?

- I don't know!

I mean, I'm going to go with
kind of, because the one-

- Killed you.
- They snapped my neck.

- Yeah, that was really creepy.

- Yeah, but I'm better,
so I feel weird about it,

because I'm like, well, I got better.

- They didn't bring you back to life.

- Yeah, I don't know.
I'm on your side here.

- I know!
- I'm just letting you know,

I don't really have a lot more
information than you have.

But thank you, wow. Wow,
that's a lot of blood.

They're bleeding a lot. You did that.

You did a good job. High five.

Yeah.

Nice. Lila, that's you.

- You're cheating, you're
cheating! I made it easy for you!

- There's no game. I'm not
cheating if there's no game.

- Stop showing off to Sybil!
Stop showing off to her!

- Question, who do you think,

in Tula's mind right now,
is the biggest threat?

- I have not seen anyone
hit Speaker for a second,

and Speaker is the one that
still has a spell effect going.

No one's in melee of Speaker,
so Speaker's the threat to me.

- Cool, you are sort of scanning,

and the way your eyes linger on Speaker,

this wolf, who has been
staring at you unerringly,

without looking up or away,

the tail flicks out and is
going to attack Speaker.

- Mother! The wolf is Mother!
- Yes, Mother!

- Wolf Mother, and you see,

as this tail made of vertebrae

that are being generated in
real time, you see the wolf

going thin as it's consuming
energy to build itself.

- [Siobhan] Oh no!
- The tail streaks out

and impales Speaker, and
then there's a little pull.

- [Izzy] Uh-oh!
- And it gets stuck,

because of the barbs on
the end of this spiny tail.

It's just going to stay there,

and the wolf kind of pulls
and goes... (whimpers)

It's just going to leave it in.

That is the wolf's legendary action.

- Awful.
- And now we've got Viola.

Wait, no, I missed Thorn.
- No, yeah, I just sucked.

- Oh no! Okay, that went the sad way.

- That was this round, I think, actually.

- Yeah.
- [Erika] Was it this round?

- There's a lot happening, yeah.

Combat is fun and doesn't
drag. Viola, you're up.

- Okay, great, so Speaker is not acting

of their own will
because they are impaled.

- Speaker's got some
stuff in them. They're up.

They're like, oh no.
- [Erika] Incapacitated in some way?

- They've got a bony tail spike in them,

but they got some fight left in them.

- They're a spellcaster, also.

They can probably still do shit.

- Yeah.
- Right, okay.

So my intention was to get in range

to cast Command on Speaker
to jump into the center.

to cast Command on Speaker
to jump into the center.

- [Izzy] Uh-oh.
- Jump into the Blue.

- Give me, before you use this spell,

just give me an arcana check.

- Arcana check, okay.

- I want the wolf to do the
thing that Hulk does to Loki

in The Avengers when he's
like, bonk bonk bonk!

- [Siobhan] Pick it up
and dunk it in there.

- Oh, golly. Five.
- This is a great idea.

- [Siobhan] Goddammit!

(Rashawn sputters in disappointment)

- Okay.

- They might be made out of Blue juice.

- They may be made out of
Blue juice. Totally fine.

I thought about it and I was like,

no, you don't want your kids...

Jaysohn jumps off of stuff
and he gets hurt all the time.

We shouldn't do that, okay,
so instead of doing that,

I happen to be behind
this pillar that I cannot-

- [Aabria] Oh, sorry, you
are essentially right here.

- Pardon.

Yeah, I can get close to
Snuffleupagus over here.

- Got 'em!
- Epic.

- Absolutely roasted.
- [Aabria] Abso-fucking-lutely roasted.

- [Siobhan] He takes 25 psychic damage.

- I need to speak to you real
quick. Hold on, excuse me.

- [Jasper] Excuse me, are you the manager?

- [Siobhan] Oh my goodness, wow.

- You come over to the
one known as Silence.

- And I say, excuse me.

- Perfect, I have to speak to you.

Silence just goes... (wheezes)

- Oh, that's too bad.

Then I'm going to attack
twice with my whip.

- Your (over-enunciated) whip.

- Okay, ♪ attack number
one with the whip. ♪

12 plus 6 is 18.

- Hits.
- Yes, okay!

Let's see how the second one goes.

Maybe I'll hit them again.

6 plus 6 is 12.

- Just misses.

- Yeah, I can't add
anything to that quite yet,

so we're going to do 1d6
slashing for that ass.

- [Izzy] (quietly) For that ass.

- Two, which is totally fine,

because then I am going to
bonus action Divine Favor

and do an extra d4.
- Love it.

- So four damage.

- You must get a modifier there,
no? To the blade of grass?

Do you not add a modifier
to the blade of grass?

- With a whip, 2d6 plus 1d10.

- Okay, so that was a two, so one more.

Plus four, so six.

- Divine Smite lets you add
on after you know you hit,

and it doesn't take an
action or a bonus action.

It's just for free, so you could burn

another 1st-level spell slot
and throw another 2d8 on there.

- [Erika] Also, reminder that
Silence has disadvantage.

- Thank you, sister.
- Looking out for you, Vi.

- 2d8.
- [Erika] Wait, what is it?

- So we had six, okay, plus 2d8.

- [Erika] Ability checks and attack rolls.

- Plus another six.

- And you already did your d10?

- Of acid damage, and
that's just one d10, okay.

- [Erika] Frightened of me.
- Another six.

- [Aabria] Right, so is that
with everyone, or just you?

- Plus whatever modifier you add.

- Plus, it would be dex, probably?

- [Siobhan] Plus your dex or strength.

- Okay, plus my dex is plus three,

so I said there was eight, oh gosh-

- Yeah, it was 12 plus 6.
That's 18 plus 3, which is 21.

- [Aabria] Perfect.

- 21, please. Thank you, everyone.

- [Aabria] No, you're
good, that was great.

- Paladins are really hard.

You have to throw a lot of stuff on there.

- In a single hit, you
have bloodied Silence.

- Yes!
- [Aabria] As they gurgle back,

please make a dexterity
saving throw for me.

- Gladly!

- And you can add, yeah, a d4.

- Okay.

Six.

- Okay, you take the full
19 points of fire damage.

- Yes, ma'am.
- Anything else on your turn?

- That Divine was a bonus
action. I guess I will get out...

I used my full movement, didn't
I, to get out of the way.

I just go...

- Auntie V!

- What?

- [Jasper] (whisper) In
front of the children.

- She's allowed to do
it! Why can't I do it?

- Your aunt has earned the right!

- I'm like this to the bishop.

- Honestly, Jaysohn? Hell yeah, go for it.

This is the appropriate-

- Actually, I go-
- Time and a place, kids.

- Shut up walrus.
- [Jasper] Silence walrus.

- The pope takes one more
point of psychic damage

getting flipped off by a child.

- Every little boy's dream,

to deal psychic damage flipping the bird.

- [Aabria] Fuck you, bro! I
am going to write that down.

That is funny, and that did happen.

- That did happen.

- That is funny, and that did happen.

- Why do we tell stories?

Viola, I need you-

- I've got 29 hit points,
just so everybody knows.

- You have 29 hit points?
- Yes, ma'am.

- Good to know.

I'm going to need you to
make a wisdom saving throw

as Silence, on their turn, gurgles,

and you see, out of where a jaw once was,

this open mouth with
just top teeth, spittle

and a gurgling sound
comes out as they cast.

- Okay.

17.

- 17 makes it.

You feel Silence's mind
connect with yours,

You feel Silence's mind
connect with yours,

and then begins a sort of tug of war

of trying to pull you down
and pull you to their side.

But in this moment, you have the ability

to communicate with them,
and they say to you, submit.

If you wipe us out, all will be lost.

You can respond to this text.

- You know what, I'm going
to leave you on read.

I'm trying to leave you on read,

and then I just hear...
(mimics heart beating)

- Yeah, you hear that heartbeat,

and in that little moment
of mental attention

being moved away, for your children,

you must defend.

If we die, we die.

But you cannot let us fall.

They will wipe us out.

We are pale imitations.

They are worse than us.

Now, there is no
Domination happening here.

- Sure.

- [Aabria] Feel free to leave it on read.

But you see Silence makes
another attempt at communicating

and sort of falling short,

you feel the spell sort of
fizzle away, to no effect.

Let's go, Jaysohn. Whatcha you got?

- How's this pope looking?
- Fucking terrible.

- Great, okay, so I will do
first attack against the pope.

- You have the help action,
not that it means anything.

- I actually don't need the help action.

- [Aabria] Oh yeah, because
they're stunned. That's fair.

- Because they're stunned.
It's an 18 to hit.

- Yes, hits.

- Great, I'm not going to
do sneak attack on this one,

because they already look
pretty fucked up, right?

- Yeah, do what you want to do.

- Ooh!

- That's 18 plus 5,

so 23 on my first attack.

- Can you just describe what you do,

and then we can move along
to who you attack next.

- Great, I lock eye contact with Sybil,

and I just rip this pope's
throat out and give it to her.

- Sybil's just like, oh no.

This is both the most
romantic and horrifying thing.

How old are you again?

- Old enough.

- Okay, I don't believe
that, but thank you so much.

- You're so welcome.

- It's just like me and your
grandfather on our first date!

- [Aabria] Tuck, tuck.
- So this guy behind me

that had the Fear on
me, when it was impaled

by this wolf's horrifying tail,
did it keep concentration?

- It actually made the con save.

- It did?
- Yeah.

- Okay, so I'm still afraid of this guy,

so I'm going to nope out of that.

But I have 40 feet of movement,

so I believe I can get to Silence.

- [Aabria] Yes, you can.

- Great, so I will run around
and I will do second attack

against Silence with sneak attack.

- Beautiful.
- And I crit.

- Oh my fucking god. A 20 and a nat one!

- Oh my god!

- Come on, Jaysohn!
- Jaysohn!

- So that's 13.

I'm rolling great, finally.

I just needed to roll not in the box.

13, 29,

32, 39.
- I think you can stop.

I think you can stop.
- 44 points of damage.

- [Brennan] What's the meme?

- Stop, stop, he's already dead!

- They're already dead! You
killed them 20 hit points ago.

I was going to do a cute little
Brennan special and be like,

I'm going to write on an index
card how many hit points...

And you said the number
before I got it down.

I was like, I guess I don't
have to write it down.

It's fine, I think the
moment has passed. Fuck!

Jaysohn is the scariest
thing in the whole world.

Just describe for me,

you've freshly handed the
trachea of Stoat Pope.

- Yes.
- And then you run over.

- Okay, I'm going to grab
Silence with my real hands,

pull it down to my knee to
knock it out and throw it down

and then use both my arms
and my astral self arms

to hug my grandma.

- [Aabria] Aw!

- Grandma, I thought you were dead!

- My little grandson!

It's horrible. It's so sticky.

- I'm still going to eat it.

- You touch it. You take a point...

No, there's no universe in
which your little strawberries

survived being in the Blue!

You hand, and the moment
it leaves your hand,

it just turns into dust.

- I, Siobhan, am taking this from Erika.

- Pull a strawberry out.

Kill me!
- The strawberry runs away.

- [Aabria] I'm alive too,
and I do not want to be.

- The humans are coming!

- That's how A Crown of Candy began.

- It's all connected!
- [Erika] Shared universe!

- [Brennan] There you go.
- Amazing.

All of my cool guys are
dead. Thorn, you are up.

- Come on, baby.
- [Aabria] Tula, you're on deck.

- Okay, this one hasn't
been particularly hit.

- It has a wolf tail inside of it.
- Oh no, it's been impaled.

That's it, thank you very much.

It's still frightened of me, unless it's-

- Correct.
- Yeah, okay.

I'm going to run up to this creature.

- [Aabria] They stagger back.

- I'm going to grab it by the
lapels and say, this ends now!

- I'm going to grab it by the
lapels and say, this ends now!

And as I do, I'm going
to cast Charm Person.

- You attempt to cast a spell.

Counterspell.

- Okay.

- Why are you so determined
to lead this warren to ruin?

- Why are you so determined
to lead this warren to ruin?

- We are determined to lead
our family to survival.

- We are determined to lead
our family to survival.

- You have no idea what's coming.

What makes you think
you know better than us,

that have stood for generations

in patient defense for their return?

- I don't, but I trusted my instincts,

and I followed the Blue,
and it led me here.

- We hoped to save you.

- I'm sorry, but you failed. I won't.

- Anything else?

- No, truly I have nothing
else. Well, I'll...

Just in case any shenanigans happen here,

I will use my bonus
action to Hunter's Mark.

- Hell yeah. What does your
Hunter's Mark look like?

- As I'm holding on,

the vines that, as I
usually cast any magic,

the vines crawl down my arms,

and the vines make
contact with their skin.

As that happens, you just see
a tiny little lightning bolt

kind of marks on them, and
just glows ever so slightly.

So I'll have advantage
on tracking them down

if they poof out of
midair or, I don't know,

do some magic-y bullshit.

- Which they absolutely would love to do,

and are sort of not having the day

they thought they were going to have.

Tula, you're up.

- I see that this wolf wants to attack

the people that hurt it,
which is its right to do,

but I'm just going to say

from a place of compassion, stay safe.

Don't let them hurt you
anymore. You can rest.

And I will move over to Speaker,

having heard what Thorn just said,

and if I can close in distance,
I'll just say to Speaker-

- [Aabria] Move you up and over.

You feel the spine pull out of Speaker

just as the wolf walks off to the side

and begins to curl up and lick its wounds.

- I'll look at Speaker and say,

you've stood here for generations.

Was that on four legs or two?

The humans are already here.
And I'm going to attack twice.

That's a nat 20.

- Yes, yes, yes!

- That's a nat 20 and a 17.

- Oh god, I hate when a paladin crits.

In lieu of rolling damage,

I just want you to describe
what it looks like.

- My sweet daughter said,

do we want to keep one alive for secrets?

And I think as I reach back
into this force of Blue

to release all of this energy,

I go to my daughter and I just
look at you in this moment

as I, your mother,

want this stoat dead.

I want them gone.

But I'm going to trust you in this moment,

and I look to you.

Do you think it's worth the danger

to keep them here with us?

- Even knowing you voluntarily
kept something from us,

having had that realization
today or yesterday

or whatever time is-
- [Aabria] Who could say?

- She just looks at you and she goes,

I trust you more than any feeling
I've ever felt in my life.

I trust you more than any feeling
I've ever felt in my life.

- Any secret of yours is not worth having.

I deal lethal damage.

- Amazing.

- Cool.

Yeah, my mom's strong!

- And just a big punch, it looked like.

- Just one big punch.

- The whole point is
that they're too human.

I tear their throat out with
my teeth. That's the stoat way.

- [Aabria] Just as you sort
of bite in and make purchase

on their larynx, you hear
that they are laughing.

As you pull, just that
last little gurgle of,

she'll be back.

- What the fuck?
- That's it?

- The wolf licks his wounds,
and everything goes still.

- Okay, now what do we do?

- Thorn feels extremely
conflicted in this moment.

Super happy that Ava's here,
but is also really concerned,

having seen what these
things ended up like.

If I can do an insight,
is Ava actually okay,

or is Ava starting to get
a little, this situation?

- Sure, give me an
insight, and you know what?

Jaysohn, go ahead and give
me a perception check.

- 16.

- 19.

- Jaysohn, you hug your
grandmother, and she is...

It hurts a little bit,

not because she's hugging you too tightly,

but because she's covered in
this stinging, terrible liquid.

But you do notice,
especially at your height,

right up against her chest,

you don't hear her heart beating.

You see it, something in her eyes.

Oh no, they weren't
always that shade of blue.

You don't have blue eyes.

Something that reflects,

even as the milky white
and black scan the room,

something a little
reflective, a little wrong.

- Mom, I think Grandma's sick.

- [Aabria] You know that she's not alive.

- Okay, and is that similar...

Have I seen that before

in any of the other stoats
here, or these stoats?

- Yeah, it was hard to place.

Everything that could be
swept up in how off-putting

meeting the stoats that
you've met across your time,

across myriad warrens, no matter how much

you go to help, there's always resistance.

Of course, you know, being
integrated into any new family

is very difficult, too,

and Ava was always really standoffish.

But that wasn't the thing
that was pinging in your head

when you tried to figure
out why you felt a distance

between yourself and Tula.

You realize now, your mind, your heart,

the thing that thinks with the Blue,

understood without understanding

that whatever's happening to Ava,

happened long ago to Tula.

And that's where we're
going to end tonight.

- What the fuck?
(Jasper screeching)

- Why are you such a secretive bitch?

- Maybe there's a way that we can go

back out into the forest.

It doesn't have to be
terrifying and filled

with smoke and poison and
chipmunks inside of fucking bears!

with smoke and poison and
chipmunks inside of fucking bears!

- Oh, you have to look
out for the chipmunks.

- Yeah, they're really fucking nasty.

- They can all do that, and
it's not just bears. It's bad.

- What?

- You are so obsessed with
power and obsessed with control

that you have taken this whole family

and demanded that every bad thing

that has ever happened
to us was our fault.

If you were really strong,

you would be able to be
sad when bad things happen

instead of demanding
that there was something

we could have done.

It is a big, big forest,
and we are just stoats.

- What's your plan?

- That's what we're going to figure out.

- Well, pro tip, don't
do a bunch of mass murder

without having a little
plan first, just a thought.

- How long has your heart
not been beating, Mama?

Before we got here? Last
winter? Winter before that?

- Who can say? It's not something
I normally keep track of.

- It would be very helpful to know

our family's medical history,

as I am going to be bringing
more life into the world.

- We both have our shit
absolutely locked down by women!

- We both have our shit
absolutely locked down by women!

- Agreed!

- Yeah, we're not going to
give each other a hard time

about that part, because we both like it.

- Yes, we do.
- And I know I'm a little guy.

I'll listen to what you say.
- Uh-huh.

- But if you come for
me, you'd best not miss!

And the tape I found.

(melancholy music)