Dimension 20 (2018-…): Season 19, Episode 5 - Emergency Powers - full transcript

Tension and Fucks head to court, The Fix visits an old friend, and Conrad steps up.

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(cool opening noir music)

- Y'all want to play a game?
- [Everyone] Yeah!

- Hello, one and all!

Welcome back to another
thrilling episode of

"Dimension 20: Mentopolis."

I'm your humble GM, Brennan Lee Mulligan.

With me, as always,
are our Prefrontal PIs.

Say hi, Prefrontal PIs.
- [Everyone] Hi, Prefrontal PIs.

- I really beefed that
one. I did a bad job.

- Another one. Go again, go again.
(swingin' jazz music)

- (carefully) Hi, Prefrontal PIs.

- It's not easy.
- I did it, okay.

- (over-enunciating) Hi Prefrontal PIs.

- (over-over-enunciating)
Hi Prefrontal PIs.

- The dragon will come
when it hears the drum.

Last we left off,

(sighs) even trying to recap last episode

is sort of daunting to think about.
(Siobhan laughing)

Last we left off, there was a convergence

of the vast majority of our
group at Oblongata Station

with one Ivana Popov,

Mentopolis' long lost fight
response at Oblongata.

After some smooth talking
from one A. Tension,

Max ran off to get some vodka,
some tea, and some champagne.

- Can we be very clear? It
was room temperature vodka.

- Room temperature vodka.
- Thank you.

- The keys of attention,
impulse, and fight itself

were placed into the reflex
board at Oblongata Station

and the big guy, one Elias Hodge,

fired the grappling gun up towards the

roof of Gobstopper Industries
in the outside world.

However, gangsters from the
Avaricci mob and shock troops

from the city police department
converged on this space.

There was Dan Fucks' heroic stand.

- Yes. Yes!
(players laughing)

Thank you, thank you for acknowledging

both the genius and the-

- [Brennan] The genius, the power.
(players laughing)

- I was thinking about
that moment this morning,

because I was thinking about it

within the context of
what that meant for Elias,

because that meant that he
was falling through the sky

and then some small part of him was like,

is this like sex? And then

the rest of his brain went,
- Is this what sex is like?

- Absolutely not, shut the fuck up!

This is the stupidest
idea you've ever had.

(players laughing)
(Brennan slapping the table)

- Honestly, I get- relatable, relatable.

(screaming in terror) Wait a minute.

No. (resumes screaming in terror)

(players laughing)

- Could I like this? No, no, no.

- Am I into this?

When you have a very novel
experience for the first time,

some part of your brain has to go,

do I like this in that way?

(players laughing)

So there was a splitting
of the party here,

and we had Conrad,
Anastasia, Imelda, and Ivana

all surrender themselves
to the shock troops

in order to get out of this bad situation

after Anastasia successfully

used her press pass

to slow down the cops'
roll in time for everyone

to finish saving the big
guy and leaving the station,

and we found that those
four got in the squad car

of one Officer Joie de Vivre
and headed off into the city

while Hunch Curio took Dan
Fucks' unconscious body

and ended up in the car
with one Justin Fication,

Conrad's basset hound, all
headed for Hunch's office.

All the way across town in Cortex City,

The Fix found himself face to
face with a shadowy stranger

wielding a white key made
out of alien frequencies

developed in the outside
world of Gobstopper Industries

to alter the mind of one Elias Hodge.
(grand tense music)

Indeed, what hath he created?

The Fix was fast enough to
leap through the window,

mirroring the injury
that we suddenly realize

was not inflicted on Elias, but rather,

Elias inflicted on
himself, leaping to safety

knowing that between the
rays of the psychometer

knowing that between the
rays of the psychometer

or the exterior of Gobstopper Industries,

one of them was solvable with
the grappling gun on his belt.

Leaping to the ground
below, The Fix broke his leg

and wandered to Las Vagus Casino,

initiating a huge reduction in pressure

all the way from the red back to the green

with a much needed reflexive
releasing of the bowels.

Apologies to all those pedestrians below

on the sidewalk outside
of Gobstopper Industries.

Reconverging at Hunch's, Hunch,

with a wide selection of ice cold steaks,

(players laughing)
(dramatic string music)

restored and revivified Dan Fucks

and fixed the broken leg of The Fix.

Then for the rest of
you, there was a shootout

between the gangsters and
the fuzz on a highway,

and I would say you stole the squad car,

but truthfully, you
were given the squad car

thanks to some sweet
talking from Anastasia.

And all of you converged in Cortex City,

headed towards,

in the case of our- impulse,
attention, and conscience,

you headed to the mayor's office,

where you discovered Leon Logic
was not Leon Logic at all,

but rather a disguised Frank Freeze.

The brain's freeze response
had been running the city

for who knows how long.

(silly-goofy) Oh, brother.

(players laughing)

But having kidnapped him,
Frank did one last thing

before you sort of kidnapped the mayor,

which is, let's be frank,
sort of what happened.

Frank turned the key and froze up

the legs, ankles, and feet of the big guy

to crash through the glass successfully,
(glass shattering)

meaning wherever the big guy is,

he's not falling to his death

and he's not swinging on a grappling gun.

However, he is once again
inside Gobstopper Industries.

Last episode was fucking packed.

- Yeah, a lot of stuff happening.

- The Fix, Hunch, and Dan
Fucks all made their way to

the precinct of Mentopolis' finest,

where Dan was given up for arrest.

Dan went upstairs with Justin Fication,

the loyal hound still
looking for his beloved boy,

and you met the chief of police

while The Fix and Hunch went downstairs

to discover the evidence of
Norrell Ojiccle's murder,

where you discovered a copper gun,

much like the supplements
related to the copper filaments

that Elias had said would
inhibit the worst impact

of his psychometer from
potentially altering thoughts.

A copper gun used at the crime scene,

but not the murder
weapon, that crossed out,

and instead stated only as an exhibit.

Where we also saw The
Fix meet one Pasha N.,

a forensic scientist buried in
the basement of the precinct

working on filing evidence away,
(light curious music)

and as they exchanged fun
facts, we saw on her desk

a picture of her long lost
brother, Ichabod Ice Skates.

Meanwhile, upstairs, Dan Fucks
killed the chief of police.

(group laughing)

Completely inadvertently, but
the more I thought about it,

the more I was like, oh, pleasure
was literally restrained,

and in trying to break
out of the restraints,

killed Tightass, so there you go.

- There you go. Hey, it works.
- Pleasure unleashed. Bam!

(laughs) I guess if you shit
while swinging through the sky,

- Things are going to get shifted around

a little bit.
- Yeah things are going to get

shifted around in there.

All of you got back out
to the street, converged,

jumped into the squad car and took off
(car racing away)

towards Thalamus &
Sons, the shop that sold

Norrell Ojiccle this strange
weapon made of copper.

And with that, we begin our episode.

(Hank puffs out like a horse)

(players laughing)

- Are you sure we're not done?

(players laughing)

- I'm tired already.

- I know, that last episode
was wild, how much happened.

The squad car

zips through the streets.
(car skidding, police sirens)

Still, you see, there's some broken-

- Woo!

(group laughing)

- Go ahead and give me a
sneak check real quick.

We'll call it a difficulty of eight

to make sure you get there uninhibited.

- We got a seven plus two
plus three for driving.

That's a 12.

- 12. Woo!

Squad car goes through.

Having a vehicle that specifically
can break traffic laws,

(players laughing)

you're getting around Mentopolis.

- Hey, you guys want me to
turn the lights and sirens on?

- Turn the lights on! Turn the lights on!

- Conrad, if we get through this,

remind me to give you a job.

- All right!

- Pro child labor here in
Mentopolis. Here we go.

(players laughing)

The squad car pulls up.
(slow jazz music)

Now it's deep in the middle
of the night at this point.

The rain falls down. You
see this shop closed up.

It looks like a small little pawn shop,

so it's not necessarily that
this place makes weaponry

but rather that just this
weapon was pawned here,

got here some other way.
(persistent heavy rainfall)

But you notice the shop has that like

collapsible iron grating

that goes in the front of it,
and you look around and see

all these little discarded
pieces of gadgetry in the window.

Seems like this is a kind
of place of knickknacks

and other sorts of
bric-a-brac that come through.

You see a small staircase going up.

You notice it's a little
three-story brick building

that clearly has an
entrance to an apartment

up in the back of the shop.

What do you all do as you arrive?

- The first thing I do
is I turn to A. Tension

and I just sort of say, hey uh...

I keep forgetting I have this.

It feels more reasonable that

someone with a longer
attention span should have it.

I give her the oculus.

Seems like someone who has a key

and can maybe remember they have it

should be looking at this
thing, keeping tabs on the guy.

It was fun at first, but
then it lost my interest, so

(players laughing)

- A. Tension goes and
gives him a huge hug.

- Oh god! Ugh!

(players awwing)

- This long rivalry between
curiosity and attention-

- Okay, don't be weird about it.

(players laughing)

- This moment of connection, I think,

is very sweet in this place.

Seeing this act of
kindness from curiosity,

you realize how long the
two of you have been at odds

you realize how long the
two of you have been at odds

for being such natural allies,

and how out of wack the
big guy's life has been

that he has felt so compelled to,

and you think about your editor as well,

that he has felt so
compelled to focus on things

that he was not truly curious about.

- (sighs) You know, I'm
not going to make it weird.

- Thank you.

(Brennan laughing quietly)

- But we should've been
best friends long ago.

(Trapp immediately fully sobbing)

(players laughing)

- Just starts weeping.

(players laughing)

- Hunch starts weeping.

The rest of you look and see
the boarded up pawn shop.

You do notice, however,
that up on the second story,

there is a very dim light
coming through curtains,

almost like a small reading light

or something else like that.

What is it that you all do in this moment,

approaching this shop for clues?

- I just want to say, goddammit!

(players laughing)

And everybody looks at me, and I say,

I left the fucking ice
skates in the DA's office.

- [Brennan and Danielle] Oh no!
- I didn't realize,

'cause I was in a lot of
pain for a while there,

but I just wanted you to know that,

the whole crew,

'cause I knew it.
- Okay, what is with these ice skates?

- I don't know what they're good for,

but he wanted me to destroy 'em.

- I start climbing the
stairs up to the landing.

- I'm just thinking about that.

(players laughing)

- It's okay, the ice
skates are just, you know,

they're just an object, but
now we can tell the story.

- We'll keep the ice skates

in ourselves, is what you're saying.

- Yeah.
- I do like to eat whatever.

(players laughing)

- Yeah, so it's like if you ate them,

we also wouldn't be able
to see them anymore,

but we'd have them with us.
- It's just like that.

Thanks so much, Conrad.
- No problem.

- I think I will also go up the stairs,

because maybe, you've
been real lucky so far,

but maybe I should be doing the talking.

- What do you mean? I'm
a great slick detective.

(Trapp laughing)

With no more Moxie left.

(players laughing)

- So you guys see that
the shop in front of you,

the stairs are inside the shop.

- Oh, I thought it was like a fire escape.

- But there is actually a fire escape.

You just have to jump up and
sort of grab it if you want to.

- Absolutely do that.
(Brennan laughing)

- Go ahead and give me
either a sneak or a sharp.

Call it a four.

- Do you need uppies?
(Alex laughing)

- I will do it as a
planned action with sneak.

- Cool, so you see Hunch
leaps up to the fire escape.

Imelda, do you want to join Hunch
(fire escape shifting)

climbing up the fire escape?
- Just grab his ankles.

- Sneak? Sure, yeah. I'll
also halve it with four.

- Great, so you see this
femme fatale and private eye

just leap up and start
scrambling up a fire escape.

You get to a window on the second floor

where you see there is a dim reading light

coming in through the window there.

- Do I see anyone inside?

- [Brennan] Uh, the curtains are drawn.

- Ah, I see.

- I knock delicately.
(light knocking)

- [Hank] On the window?
- [Brennan] On the window?

- The creepiest thing you can
hear on an upper floor window.

(players laughing)

- Excuse me, Mr. Thalamus.
(slow intriguing music)

- The curtains part,
and you see an old man

in the full 1930s, not
only the sleeping gown,

but the reading robe, the
quilted robe over the gown

and a tiny little synaptic candle.
(Freddie laughing)

He goes, well, hey there. What's the...

You two are on my fire escape.

- We're so sorry to disturb
you at this late hour,

- We're so sorry to disturb
you at this late hour,

but we were wondering if you

had any more of these pretty copper guns.

- Oh, customers!

(Hank guffawing)

Go ahead and give me a slick check.

We'll call it a difficulty of seven.

- I'll just halve it.

- I don't want to do this,
but I think it's so funny

to imagine climbing up
someone's fire escape,

pulling out a gun, and being like,

(erratically) do you have
any more of these guns?

(players laughing)

Don't freak out! Do you
have any more of these guns?

- Okay, I'm going to
ask for you to give me

a slick seven as well, and
anything you get under that

is going to increase the
roll that Siobhan has to do.

Go ahead and give me a
slick roll real quick.

- My slick ain't good. All right.

- [Brennan] Here we go.

- That is a three.

- [Brennan] Okay, so now
yours goes from 7 to 11.

- Great, I mean, I could still halve it,

but where's the fun in that?

Okay, that is a...

It's a 17, unless he knows who I am,

in which case it's a dirty 20.

- Damn!
- Wow, incredible.

Some Moxie for our friend Mr. Curio.
(ball sliding on a track x2)

- We're looking for more of these guns!

- Ah! Ah!

Ah! We're being murdered!

- Please don't worry about
my friend. He's enthusiastic.

- Oh my goodness, are you Imelda Pulse?

- That's right, that's right.

- Well, I have to say, you know,

normally the store does close at six PM,

and it is three in the morning,

(players laughing)

but anything for the delightful Ms. Pulse!

I read all about you in the paper.

- And I'll be sure to
recommend you to the press.

In fact, we have a journalist
with us right here. Perhaps...

I wave down from the fire escape.

- You see he opens, looks
down and says, hello?

- Hi!

- Perhaps she'd be interested

in writing a puff piece
about your beautiful shop.

- I might be interested in writing

a puff piece about your beautiful shop.

- Do we have to call
it a puff piece to me?

(players laughing)

I find it quite meaningful!

(players laughing)

- I start climbing in through his window.

I'm not even waiting for an answer.

- Sorry, no, I don't like or know you!

(players laughing)

He goes, this is my home.

You go back down the fire escape,
(players laughing)

and I'll put on real clothes,
go down, and open the store.

- Where'd you get that
robe from? That looks nice.

- This robe?
- [Trapp] Yeah.

- Well, you know, I collect
odds and ends all over,

but this robe here, well,
this is not for sale.

I own this. Again, I live in
this part of the building.

And downstairs is where I work.
- I turn to Imelda and go,

something tells me this is where he lives.

(Brennan laughing)

- You know, I really got the impression

that you were smarter than you are.

(players laughing)

- You see he closes the
window, and sure enough,

you hear footsteps back
down, and the light goes on,

and all of you watch the door open up.

You see he says, my,
(door chimes)

what an entourage you have, Ms. Pulse.

Everyone come on inside.
Welcome to Thalamus & Sons.

You're coming to buy something,

so you're not here to sell anything.

- No.
- [Brennan] All right.

- I don't think so. Am I?

- I think we're looking,
just if you could tell us

a little bit more about
(slow, curious music)

this piece here.

I take out the copper gun and say,

we believe this was purchased

by a young fellow named Norrell Ojiccle.

Just wondering if you could tell us

anything about that sale, this object.

- Ah, Norrell! Norrell
stops by all the time.

How's Norrell doing? How's he-

- He's been better,

I'm going to be honest.
- How's his wife and kids?

He's like, (laughing)
how's the wife and kids?

- I'm going to be honest,
he's been better, for sure.

He's definitely been better.

- I'm sorry to hear that.

Well, he's a swell guy, you know.

You see he walks off, goes
behind his little counter.

Anyone who's talking to
Mr. Thalamus can feel free

to make any sort of slick checks you want,

but is there anything else anyone is doing

in the space here while
you're sort of all together?

- Does anybody have a good snoop?

I'll snoop just so I can get some Moxie.

- Yeah, I was going to snoop too.

- [Freddie] I'm going to
snoop around a little bit.

- Yeah, I'll snoop.
- We'll call it a difficulty,

I'll say there is a lower
difficulty eight snoop check

and then there is a more
advanced 12 snoop check.

- I'll take my Moxie.

(ball sliding on a track)

- [Trapp] Did you take the
treasure hunter ability?

- Dan Fucks has treasure hunter.

- I do have treasure hunter, you're right.

I just did eight plus two, 10,
and I'll spend a Moxie also

to find a mundane but
useful item on top of my 10.

- What was the...

The first one was eight?

- [Brennan] First one was eight.
- Halving it.

- Halving it, okay, so you
get that snoop automatically.

- I got an eight.
- [Brennan] You got an eight, cool.

So you both make that snoop.

- I got a nine.

- [Brennan] A nine for snoop here as well.

- And then I'll do slick.
- [Brennan] Okay.

- That's a one, but I do add five to it.

- Okay.
- Wow.

- So I think if you're
just trying to keep Norrell

sort of on, like, he's
just sort of gabbing

and talking and not saying
anything necessarily that useful.

But as he's talking, he says,
yeah, Norrell's a swell guy.

Well, that copper gun's
a strange beast, right?

It came in not too long ago,
but for a lady like yourself,

you're looking for some
self-defense, I imagine.

You're looking for a purse pistol.

- Sure!

You know what? Genuinely, on that six.
(beguiling twinkle)

- What a salesman!

- Well, while I'm here, I
actually do want a purse pistol.

What've you got? Have
you got a pearl handle?

- Oh, we got a pearl handle all right.

- Beautiful.
- You see he says,

now we don't have any pure
copper guns like that,

but we should still have
some of the copper ammunition

that went with it.

- Oh yeah, right, yes. Yes, of course.

- He starts going around

and helping you out with this purchase.

You have wealth. I won't even
make you spend a Moxie for it.

You have wealthy, he's just
going to go get you the gun.

- As Hunch is in here,

he knows that he should
be finding out more about

this gun and Norrell,

but also I think just being in this shop

filled with a million
different odds and ends,

he's just sort of like, what's that?

What's that? What's the story behind that?

Can you tell me more about that?
(curious music)

What's this about? Where
did this come from?

It's like a kid in a candy shop.

He's just sort of losing
his mind a little bit.

- Hyperfixation goes over
to him and is sort of like,

now son, we've got to
take it down a notch.

- Narrow down, narrow down.
(modern-snooping music fusion)

Anyone that got that eight
snoop finds the buckshot rounds.

- Okay.
- And I think what you notice,

looking at these rounds
that went with that pistol,

he takes the copper ones out of them,

and I think you all notice
just how strangely sort of...

powerful these rounds
are on that eight snoop.

It's a strange, they're not slugs.

It's almost like, Mentopolis
is a totally urban environment.

It's almost like, Mentopolis
is a totally urban environment.

There's not a lot of animals
other than this one dog.

You're not going to go hunting, right?

So there's a strange thing going on here

having to do with what
utility there would be

in this kind of ammunition.

- Right.

- And he's given us the rounds,

or we just see them?
- I think on that

snoop check, all of you notice,

as he's helping Imelda with her purchase,

that he's basically stopped,

he's basically only
focused in on Imelda, and,

who has totally gotten him to focus in,

and the rest of you are able to look

at what he's doing while he's doing it.

- What is this fur collar? Is this sable?

- [Brennan] Oh, absolutely.
- Oh, it's beautiful!

- Yeah, oh, I'm sure.

Well, you know, the nice thing about this

is all this comes in from the imagination,

so we have any kind of
animal you could want.

We have unicorn.

- Oh my god! Oh my god!
- A unicorn coat?

- [Brennan] Oh yes, that's
absolutely right. It's nice.

- That sort of removes

the most interesting part
of the unicorn, doesn't it?

- It's just a horse.

- I mean, yeah, isn't that just horse hide

at that point if it's...

- (sassily) Well, Mr. Curio-

(players laughing)

- I'm just asking
questions! I want to know!

- People who know, know that it's unicorn.

And that's what's important

about it to me.
- I love the idea of,

there is an imagination, but
there's still so many crooks

in Mentopolis that it's like,

(sleezily) yeah yeah, it's a unicorn fur.

(players laughing)

You'd be like, the horse is also

as imaginary as the unicorn!

(players laughing)

And by the way, Moxie costs, remember,

are doubled right now because we're at 80.

- I'll do it for you, and
you can keep that one.

- Okay, so Dan, as you're looking around,

you notice that there's a small area of

papers that are put aside.

You're the one person here
that's sort of a business owner,

so you're looking, and oh look,

some ledgers and stuff like that.

And you see there's a little
crinkled piece of paper

that has a simple
(shifting calm music)

crayon drawing of a snake on it.

You see that there's a
little drawing of a snake

on a little mottled or
greasy piece of paper.

- I'm going to try and
look at that piece of paper

a little closer, anything else on it?

- It has the initials R.R.

- All right, interesting.

- It just strikes you as a
very unusual thing to see here,

and it's also not in any of the cases.

- Runaway Rapscallion?

- I mean, that could
be. For Flight, right?

- To be clear, this is a paper
that's part of his ledgers,

or this is an object that is on sale?

- It's not in the sale
area, so in other words,

there's a lot of invoices and books kept.

You're looking over a
glass case at a counter

against the wall that only he
would be able to walk and see,

and you just see amidst
this business stuff

a very cute little
childlike drawing of a snake

with the initials R.R. next to it.

(Alex gasps)
- And these pearls,

if they get pulled off my neck,

will they bounce incredibly
across the floor,

or will they stay on one string?
(slow jazz music)

- Oh, these pearls,

they're going to zigzag
all over the place!

These things are going
to ricochet like you-

- You do good work.
- Hey, you know, thank you.

Here at Thalamus &
Sons, we pride ourselves

on anything that we imagine
being needlessly overdramatic.

(players laughing)

- I can tell. He's just
really uncomfortable.

There's so many distractions in here.

I want to get rid of all this stuff!

I want to murder it all!

- Burn this place to the ground.

- Can you guys focus
on the fucking bullets?

'Cause that's what we're here for.

Why is he making all
these fucking bullets?

- There's a huge poster
on the wall of Elias Hodge

saying something to
someone rude on the bus,

this massive collection of
daydreams and stuff like that.

Yeah, I'd say something to him, too!

- Can Conrad walk over to Dan Fucks,

or is that beyond my roll?

- [Brennan] No, yeah, you
can absolutely do that.

Yeah, go for it.

(Freddie yelps)
- Dan, you just feel a little tug.

- Stop sneaking up on me!
Thought it was a small animal.

In many ways, he is.

- (sadly) My footsteps don't make sounds.

(players laughing)

- It's so creepy!
- I'll try harder.

- [Freddie] One of the
many reasons I dislike you.

- What- What are you looking at there?

- It appears to be a
small children's drawing

of a snake with two initials on it.
- Ronnie.

- [Freddie] Who?

- Ronnie Reptile.
- Huh?

- (quietly) Ronnie Reptile.

- [Freddie] I'm unfamiliar
with Ronald Reptile.

- He was just my friend
in a place I used to live.

- Oh, well, what's his drawing doing here?

- I don't know.
- [Freddie] Hm.

- You all look over at Mr. Thalamus,

who's still engaged in
conversation with Imelda.

I'm going to say that he
goes ahead and gives you

a small box of the ammunition

and a lovely little pearl-handled,

it looks almost like orna-
like it could be confused

with a decorative piece of hand jewelry,

but it has this massive,

these huge shotgun bullets
have to go into it.

So it's a very short little machine

with a lovely pearl handle.

- Have everything else wrapped
up and sent to my house.

Thank you so much.

- Absolutely, Ms. Pulse.

Absolutely. Would you
like it gift wrapped?

- Yes!

- [Brennan] It's you
buying it for yourself,

but I'd love to give
it to you as a present.

- It's absolutely a gift, for me!

(players laughing)

- He takes out this beautiful,
it's the nicest thing

in the place, is the
wrapping paper, the ribbons.

Starts to go around and tie
it up, and I think Imelda,

at this point you notice
that Conrad and Dan

have noticed something over in the corner.

- Oh right, we're here for a reason.

(players laughing)

- Can I also see if I
notice them talking about-

- I'm going to go ahead and say

that all of you can gravitate to the nexus

of attention and activity happening

with these two.
- Right.

- Great.

What is it? What's-

- Conrad is justifying their existence.

He's found something, seen something.
(curious techy music)

A children's drawing, of which
he's certainly an expert,

being a child himself.

- (sweetly) That's the nicest
thing you've ever said to me!

(players laughing)

- I don't mean it! You are
still a scourge on this group.

- (dreamily) Wow!

(players laughing)

But yeah, we were just looking

at this picture that Dan found.

- What is it? A snake?
- I have no idea.

- I don't know.

- Looks like a drawing made
by my old friend Ronnie.

- The Fix just sort of gets big
and turns to the shopkeeper.

What do you know about Ronnie Reptile?

- Sorry, what's that, sir?

- My friend thinks he's
found a little drawing

from Ronnie Reptile from Madam Loathing's.

- He looks over and he goes,

that's awful odd.

What makes you notice

that out of all the things in this shop?

- (with suspicion) Our eyes, mostly.

(players laughing)

- Some pretty good rolls.
(players laughing)

- You see he looks over and says, well,

I only mention how strange
it is because, well,

you all came here looking for the same gun

that your pal and mine Norrell had.

I was hanging on that drawing
to give it back to Norrell.

- Why did Norrell have the drawing?

- Well, he came into the shop.

He sort of had it on his person.

We were catching up, you
know, he's a friendly guy,

but he'd come in looking to buy a piece.

You know, he needed a heater,
and it was strange for me,

because he, you know,
works at Cerebell Pacific.

So I said, what kind of
trouble are you getting in?

I know he stopped by Sugah's
every once in a while.

You know, a hard drinking fella
wandering around Mentopolis

might want to have a
heater for his own safety.

But point being, he came in and asked

for something very specific,

wanted that copper gun,
wanted that ammunition.

He talked a little bit about that as well.

He said something when he got it about,

he asked a question about that buckshot,

because it's not a very
popular sort of ammunition.

Better to have a slug
if you're trying to stop

one of these crooks running
around this part of town.

- Sure.
- He said something.

When he asked about it, he said,

how strong is this shot here?

And I said, oh, plenty strong.

And he said, strong enough
to tear through metal.

And I said, I suppose so.

What, are you planning on fighting

any palookas made out of steel?

And he said, no, no, not
so much fighting palookas

as taking out an insurance policy

in case things go sideways.

- Oh boy, so did he destroy the keyhole

on purpose, do you think?

- You know, there was...

Our friend Norrell, who
is still very much alive-

- Oh good!

(players laughing)

- You know, he was there
the night of the explosion

when the machine was destroyed,

and at least as far as I know,

no one had been able to find
what had actually destroyed it.

You had the gun, which
originally said murder weapon,

and then the word murder was crossed out,

and it said exhibit A, correct?
- Mm-hm. Mm-hm.

I think it must be.

- You were pretty close with Norrell?

He came in here a lot? You chat a lot?

- He was a good pal, that's for sure.

- [Trapp] You ever see him-
- Is?

- [Brennan] Hm?
- Is? Is.

You don't know he's
dead. He is a good pal.

- What did I say?

- Was, sorry.
- [Brennan] Was?

- I didn't mean to correct
you. He is a good pal.

- Oh, I meant he was a good friend

in that in the past,
he's been a good friend.

He also is a good friend.
(players laughing)

- Can I do a snoop check to see...

(players laughing)

- [Brennan] Yeah.

- And I get a plus three to
see if someone is lying to me.

- [Brennan] Yeah, go for it.

- Very spinny. That is a nine total.

- Okay, he seems to be
telling the truth to you.

He looks and says, Norrell
was a completely swell fellow.

Yeah, absolutely, and a good pal of mine.

Sorry, what was your
question again, Mr. Curio?

- I just wanted to know if he had ever...

(investigative music)

had he ever gotten mixed up in anything...

any sort of,

him buying a gun, is this unusual for him?

- Oh sure, not a violent man at all.

Well, you know, it's sort
of a funny thing, he...

He seemed rattled the
other day when he came in.

This was the day he
walked in and he, sorta,

He was out of sorts. He
looked a little bit concerned.

He asked about the gun.

He asked about the
ammunition in particular.

It was sort of an interesting thing,

but in any case, he had
that drawing on him.

I remember he found it and he
said, what's this thing here?

He seemed as confused by it as any,

and he left it on the
thing. He remarked on it.

He said, oh, that's kind of cute,

because there'd been a field
trip to Cerebell Pacific,

and so there'd been
some kids by way there,

and I think one of them
might've just given it to him

as a present or a gift of some sort.

- Could we see the drawing?
- Yeah, you hand it over,

and you see that there's
a little coiled snake,

and it has a little sun
over it, and you can see,

I think Fix, you notice that there are,

in the way that kids put
details that are overemphasized

when it's something they remember,

you see there are a couple
little indentations,

these big scales around the
lips for detecting heat.

- Can I maybe do a savvy
check on this piece of paper

to see if there's indentations
on it from a previous...

- Give me, we'll call it savvy eight.

- Great.

I got a seven. Can
somebody lend me a Moxie?

- I can give you two Moxie
here. We're doubled, right?

- I can double one.
- Oh, great. There we go.

- You look at the drawing
of the snake here.

Gazing at it in terms
of looking for a clue,

you see there's a little
bit of grease on it,

and the edges of the paper
are a little bit rounded,

and you realize you're
holding a place mat.

(investigative music)

- Hunch, take a lick at this.

(players laughing)

- I taste the place mat to
see if I can identify what...

- He's eaten everywhere in town.

(little lip-smacking sounds)

- Tastes like syrup.

(little gasps and oohs)

- Does it taste like
syrup I've had before?

- It does taste like
syrup you've had before.

- Yes, yes, quite. This
is from Nostalgia's.

- I haven't been there in... 20 years.

- But was pretty good the
last time we went, right?

I remember it being pretty good.

(players laughing)

- Yeah, he's like, Norrell
didn't want to throw it out

because, you know,
Norrell was a sweet fella.

You know, kid made a little drawing.

But I think, you know, he'd had it

stuffed in his pocket or something,

so he just sort of forgot it
because he was preoccupied

with whatever he needed this gun for.

- I lean into Mr. Thalamus
here and I say, okay.

I'm telling you- We weren't
on the up and up before

because we weren't sure where you stand,

but you seem like a nice guy,
I gotta be honest with you.

- Oh, thank you.

- Norrell is dead.

(music stops abruptly)

- (shocked) What?

- And we're trying to help-

(Brennan wailing in despair and grief)

- He starts crying.
- Okay, listen, listen!

- This damned city!
- It is extremely important,

if there's anything else you remember

about Norrell buying this
gun, anything he left behind,

anything he said to you

that would help us find...
- I have a question.

- [Trapp] Yeah.

Did you get a look at
his eyes or anything?

Did they look the same as
you always remember 'em?

- That would be something
unusual, for instance,

that would help us.
(players laughing)

If he had, for instance,
glowing, dead eyes,

that would be good to know.
- Guide us

in a specific direction, yeah.

- He thinks down here and he says,


(serious, hollow music)

Memory's a strange thing.

The moment you say it,

it's like you put the
thought in my head, right?

- I'm not trying to suggest anything.

- No, no no no, but I mean to say,

I know that you're trying to
solve the murder of my good pal

and I want to be able to help you, I do.

So there's almost a part of
me that wants to remember

that there was something
strange about his eyes,

but I know there wasn't.

I was worried. The only
thing strange about his eyes

is they looked bloodshot, he was tired.

I think he was nervous.
But no, his eyes were fine.

- That's really helpful. Thank you.

- But...

He did mention something.

He said something. It's so funny.

There's too many
coincidences here, I think,

you coming for that gun and
finding that piece of paper.

How could you know that he was
the one that brought it in?

And you mentioned this thing
about eyes all of a sudden,

and he said something about eyes.

It wasn't even anything we talked about.

He was on his way out the door.

I remember the bell, the bell ringing,
(bell chiming)

and him walking out,
and he said something.

I said, well, good look with that heater.

Be careful around that.

I said, there's plenty of, you know,

ne'er-do-wells and villains

running around these rainy streets.

And he said, yeah. Have
to keep an eye out.

You can always tell the
crooked ones. It's in the eyes.

And it seemed like he was
remembering something,

kind of like you're remembering
something right now.

- The crooked ones. So
there's more than one of them?

- Seems like anything that key touches.

- I got one more question, sir.

- [Brennan] Yeah?

- And excuse my language, but
what the heck is a palooka?

(group laughing)

- You see he smiles, and
you see he says, well,

a palooka is, you know, a goon.

You know...

- A goomba.

- A goomba, a mook, a meathead, you know?

- Okay.
- Is that helpful?

- That's helpful!
- He says, you're a good egg,

so you don't have to
worry about growing up

into a palooka one day.

You see he folds up the
drawing of the snake

and hands it to you.

I guess Norrell's never
coming back for it and,

you know Ronnie.

- Thank you.

- (chanting rhythmically)
Madam Loathing's!

We gotta get to Madam Loathing's.

I know 'em there. She's real mean.

- As you're all getting ready to head out,

you see that Mr. Thalamus
goes back behind the counter

and says, thanks for coming in.

(Brennan mimics phone ringing)
(tense music)

And you see he says, that's odd,

and picks it up and says,
hello, Thalamus & Sons?

- I thought the phone lines were down.

- Well, things have gotten better.
- Changed.

(light buzzing)
(players ahhing)

- Ah.

- And you all realize the
phone lines are back up.

- I will say, I'm probably not the person

to actually use a gun.

- If there's one thing that you want,

it's impulse with a gun.

(players laughing)

- Yeah, and no sharp.

- No sharp whatsoever.
- Literally none.

- Just in the car spinning it around.
(gun barrel spinning)

- Check out these cool tricks!

- Look at this, I got
my finger on the button!

- Don't call it a button!
Don't call it a button!

Give me that back!
- Clickity

clickity clickly.

- So you guys exit

Thalamus & Sons.
(bell chiming)

As you do so, and get
back into your squad car,

you see Ivana and Frank,
long lost siblings,

are sort of catching up.

Justin jumps into the back with you,

and you see Frank looks up and says,

well, how'd it go in there?

- I forgot we didn't
bring you along, buddy.

- Oh, you fully kidnapped
me, you know, so I'm here.

I'm here to hel-

If you need any help or any
advice, I'm happy to give it.

- Oh, is the advice
going to be do nothing?

(Alex laughing softly)

- Look,
(players laughing)

I'm here to point out-
- Nice.

- How many things could go wrong

given any possible course of action!

- Yeah, we don't need
that advice. Let's go.

(players laughing lightly)

- Suddenly, Anastasia, you hear,

boop boop. Boop boop.
(device chiming)

And look down at the oculus beeping.

(players making sounds of piqued interest)

As it beeps, it opens up,
(tense retrofuturistic music)

and you see...

- Uh-oh.

- Looking around, the big guy standing up,

looking at a desk, and you recognize

from the memories Imelda
took, the big guy is standing

at his desk with the
schematics from the packet

that started-
- This man's a genius!

(players laughing)

- And he's got a drink.

- And he's got a stiff drink there.

- And a pair of scissors.

(players laughing)

- What a cool guy!

(players laughing)

- (impressed) Scissors!

- The oculus beeps,
giving that the big guy

has made it literally into the office

where all of his
schematics, the plans are.

You also, I think, see definitively,

looking at those schematics,

seeing how they've been changed
and altered from the packet

from the memories that you
had ingested from that,

you see the changes within the schematics

to turn the psychometer into a weapon.

Whatever Gobstopper wanted it for

was not a tool for discovery and health,

but rather a tool for mind control.

That is what it had been turned into.

- And is it the kind of thing

that you can shoot someone with?

- Yes, you see literally a
ray gun style projectile,

a ray gun, and you go,
the guy from projectiles

got put up on the research
for the psychometer.

So all of this has basically confirmed

your worst suspicions, and
looking at those schematics

on the table, you also
fundamentally see...

the frequencies attached to
those schematics and that gun

render the white key in your
mind as citizens of Mentopolis.

You see basically confirmation

of what you had already posited,

that he got hit with that ray gun

and that's what put that
white key into Mentopolis.

- So the big guy, we've got to make him

grab the schematics, right?
(cool mid-tempo music)

- Damn, how close are we to
the station? I mean, that's...

- He made it there on his own.

He might already be looking to do that.

- Well, I wouldn't be so sure.

There's no mayor anymore.

- Right, and the DA doesn't
want him to quit his job.

- But the chief of police is still there!

- Well...

(Trapp laughing)

- The way you say that!

(players laughing)

- What happened with the big
guy that tried to kill you?

- I don't know, he was at the DA's office.

I ran. I couldn't see where he went.

- What happened with the DA?

- Well, he's not the DA anymore.

He's been taken over somehow,

and there is a giant man with a key

who tried to turn me into
the white-faced zombie

that the DA became.

- What's the order of
succession in this city?

- [Hank] Yeah, how does it go next?
(Freddie laughing)

- Well, it's funny you should ask.

I outlawed any changes in
any form of government.

- [Trapp] Oh, okay.
- So you are still the mayor,

even though you became
mayor under a false name.

- Right, I'm the mayor.

Oh b'wait, I announced that I
campaigned under a false name,

so probably, I'm legally
barred from office.

But the good news is, no one
else can do anything, either!

- All right, maybe-
- Okay!

- I don't understand how that's good news.

- Well, think about
all the terrible things

that could happen if
someone did something!

- Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay.

(players laughing)

I think we gotta shoot that

guy with our copper gun, the white- the,

I didn't want to say the white guy, but...

(group laughing)

- No no no, follow this!

You see Frank says,

you said the DA's been turned into

some sort of puppet by some
figure with this white key?

- I believe that is the case.

He certainly seemed to be

entirely under the control of this man.

I have a question that I think
you might know the answer to.

- [Brennan] Oh sure.
- In this city,

where are the keyhole places
where you can put a key in

and make this big guy do somethin'.

There's one at Cerebella, where-

- Cerebell Pacific.
- Cerebell Pacific,

that's what it was.

And there's one at the station.
Is there one in your office?

- There is one in my office,

but you know what's funny, Mr. The Fix,

is that you're not the
first person to ask me that.

- Fuck.

- [Brennan] Mark Bition
came into my office

after the murder at Cerebell Pacific.

- And did you freeze up in that moment

and decide to do nothing?

- That's exactly what I did.
- Really?

- No, that's really what I did!

- That's fantastic news!

- See? Everyone has a lot of shit to say!

(players laughing)

Everyone's got a lot of shit to say

about freezing up and not doing
anything, but occasionally,

when a really handsome DA comes
in and steeples his fingers

and says, hey, do you know any
other keyholes in the city?

The main one that all of us
higher cognitive functions use

seems to have been destroyed
in the murder last night.

What I said was, you know,
that's an interesting question.

Let's game out everything
that could happen

with various answers, and
then he got really frustrated

and left before I could
say anything useful!

- So you're saying he's handsome.

- He's a good looking guy.
- Okay, that's good to know.

(players laughing)

- And I notice, once again,

you haven't told us where
the other keyholes are.

- And that's exactly how...

You see Ivana just wails out
and clocks him in the head.


I'm actually going to ask

for a DC 15 slick check to get this guy-

- Oh, I've got this!

- Can I flick him on the
forehead a couple of times

and say, you know,

(thumping sounds, ASMR lovers rejoice)

you can't hum while
you're blocking your nose.

Give it a try.

(quick fun music)

(Brennan attempting to hum and failing)

- (quietly) Wow!

Are. The. Key. Holes.
(thumping in time with speaking)

I can roll sharp instead of-
- [Brennan] Yes, absolutely.

(Brennan laughing)

Oh! Yeah, what is it?

- 15.
- [Brennan] 15!

You see he looks and says-

- Exactly 15.

- Well, there's one in my office,

but that's not a true impulse switchboard.

That's just a PA for
announcing things to the brain.

I- I can use that to freeze things up,

but it's only just good for my key.

There's- There's a couple.

There's the one at Cerebell Pacific.

- Mm-hm, which doesn't work.

- [Brennan] Unless...
- You fix it?

- Unless the phone
lines are working again.

- Oh! Oh!

- I thought it was well
and truly shot out.

- Hey, I passed that
big neuroplasticity bill

so, you know, things do
get fixed around here!

You know, things come back, all right?

The government's not totally inept!

There's a lot of things

I can do autonomically!
- That neuroplasticity bill

was really watered down.

(players laughing)

- And all you really did was sign it.

I think all of the real-

- (dumbfounded babbling) Well, hold on!

- That's been in place for a long time.

- Look, leadership is complex.

(players laughing)

- He says, the executive function branches

is at Cerebell Pacific.

Then there's the reflexive
switchboard at Oblongata Station.

There's also the autonomic switch.

That's in the head of the auto
worker's union in Motor City.

That's in the head of the auto
worker's union in Motor City.

- Fuck.

(Alex chuckling)

- Well, I do believe that going
back to Cerebellum Pacific

at this point would be a mistake.

I am guessing if they have
just gotten all of the phones

and if everything's back online,

considering that it had
already been destroyed-

- Seems like a trap.
- There's probably going to be

a huge police presence,

and perhaps more goons.

- Palookas.
- More palookas, I apologize.

I believe if we were to go
back to the train station,

we would be,

we would be dealing with the same problem,

since the last time we were there-

- I don't think Max is
going to be happy to see us

if we go back there.

(players laughing)

- I do believe that I have perhaps

ruined my relationship with them.

That will be something
I will deal with later.

I'm sure Dan does not want to
go back and get Fucksed up.

- No, no, no.
- So I think we may have

no choice but to go to the auto workers.

- I've got a broader concern,

which is that there is
a big man with a key

that he can put in any
keyhole in this body,

and we do not know where he is,

and I think that Norrell
might've shot out that hole

to prevent that from happening,

having saved all of our lives.

- I think The Fix is right.

I think we got a couple
of things going on here.

We've got,

We want to make sure that the
big guy's doing what we want.

At the same time, there's
another guy in here

trying to make sure that the
big guy does what he wants,

so we're in a race to keyholes,

but also trying to keep this
other guy out of any keyhole.

The person who seemed to know the most

about this was Norrell Ojiccle.

He's gone, but we know that Ronnie Reptile

knows something about Norrell Ojiccle.

- I didn't know they get
to go on field trips.

- Yeah, that's nice of Miss Loathing.
(players laughing)

- I mean, it sounds boring

to go to a phone factory or whatever

it is that they do there
- That sounds fucking awesome,

(players laughing)

- So it sounds like we
want maybe an offensive

to try to get to a switch,
defensive to try to hunt down

the white guy, as Conrad named him,

(players laughing)

and maybe we see if Ronnie
Reptile knows anything else

about this guy that would
help us in our hunt.

That's the way I sees it, at least.
(curious jazzy music)

- You see Frank speaks up and says,

oh boy, well, all of those
three keyholes are unprotected,

and I can't say with certainty
whether they, you know,

fixed the one at Cerebell Pacific,

but I know that that's one
that Mark Bition knows about.

- Right, he doesn't maybe
know about the Motor City one.

- Possibly. No, he...

I mean, the DA does the DA's job.

I made sure that the
executive function branch

is heavily siloed.

The only thing that possibly could happen

is he could go to the
courthouse and Judge Fusion,

if she were convinced,
could potentially award

emergency powers, if M. Bition could prove

that there was an actual
state of emergency.

But in the meantime, the big
guy's standing at this desk

probably wondering what
he should be doing.

- Well, I can go to Cerebell
because I've been there before.

Seems like if there's the DA there,

maybe I can talk us out
of some kind of trouble.

- People are looking for you now, though.

- (suavely) People are
always looking for me.

(players laughing)

- I believe that one of
us should definitely go

to the courthouse to make
sure that doesn't happen.

I have the biggest in with the court,

being that I often cover
the news of the day.

I strongly suggest that if
someone does come with me,

it be someone who is packing.

- I don't think we should put
both our guns in one place.

- Absolutely not.
- [Siobhan] This is true.

- I'm the only one who knows
anybody at Madam Loathing's.

But I'm also the one-
- I know some.

- [Hank] Yeah, you do.
- I'll come with you.

- Okay. I'm worried about all of you.

Please take care of yourselves.

(players laughing)

I can't give you Moxie
if we're not together.

- I'm going to come with Fix and Conrad,

because I'm very curious about-

- [Brennan] So The Fix, Conrad, and Hunch

are headed to Madam Loathing's.

- Yes.
- Justin goes, (barks)

And me, too! We're not
getting split up again.

- Oh, is Fight still with us? Is Ivana?

- [Brennan] Ivana's still here with you

as well, yeah, for sure.

- Maybe Ivana should come with me.

- Ivana winks and says,
that sound like a good idea.

- I was thinking maybe Dan Fucks

should go to the courthouse also,

because maybe there's a
criminal element there.

- Oh yes, quite familiar with all of them.

They don't like me at
the courthouse, though.

- This is true.
- A place of law and order.

- We'll have to give you some kind of

a disguise.
- Some sort of disguise, perhaps!

- I pull out fairy wings
(light magical twinkle)

from my bag,
(players laughing)

put them on Dan Fucks.
(magical twinkling)

- So now I am like-

- You look completely
different! A new man!

- Ooh, yes.
- I take off my trilby.

It is immediately replaced by a fedora.
(poof sound)

(players laughing)

I give you the trilby to top it off.

- Okay, so The Fix,
Conrad, Justin, and Hunch

going to Madam Loathing's.

Anastasia and Dan are headed to...

- The courthouse.
- Headed to the courthouse.

(whispering) There's so
much. This is so cool.

Everyone's doing cool stuff.
(players laughing)

And then Imelda and Ivana

are going to Cerebell Pacific?

- Yes.
- [Brennan] Hell yeah.

- I would very much like a gun.

- Well, I would very much like a gun!

Actually, I think I might
give my gun to Ivana.

(Brennan laughing)

- Okay, so you're going
to give your gun to Ivana.

You have the other copper gun.

- Yeah.
- [Brennan] Up to you.

- I also have my gun, and
if you got the copper gun-

- I think the copper
gun's only good against...

- Yeah.
- But I do think-

- A copper gun could definitely
do some damage to a normal-

- It's just like silver bullets
hurt werewolves and people.

(players agreeing)

- I'm just saying if...

- [Hank] I don't expect
to run into the key-

- At Madam Loathing's.
- [Hank] At Madam Loathing's.

So I pass the copper
gun over to A. Tension.

- Look at us! Pew, pew!

(saying pew back and forth,
practicing zero gun safety)

My finger's on the button!

- Actually, maybe just try it once,
(Alex laughing)

just to see what happens.
- [Freddie] No, no, no!

- A. Tension just starts spinning-
(gun barrel spinning)

- Spinning the little thingy?
(Alex laughing)

- And then Frank says, great!

That sounds like an amazing plan!

Which team needs my help?

- I think that we need you to go

down to Motor City by yourself.

- Wait, no one's going to Motor City.

- Just call us when you get there

and tell us everything's okay, bye!

- I'll go to Motor City and
give them all my best ideas!

(players laughing)

- Is there anything to keeping him close?

(players laughing)

- Actually, honestly, keeping
everything in exact stasis

at Motor City is not the worst thing.

- Just don't move!

- Make sure no one does anything there,

and we'll get there as soon as we can.

- Get the big guy in a closet.

- You see he looks at you
and takes a moment as Freeze.

He looks at all of you and says,

(inspiring patriotic music)

you know, this fair city of ours,

it is near and dear to my heart,

even if I haven't always
been the most honest mayor.

Sometimes it's the right thing
to freeze, but other times,

other times, you have to do
what's right by other people,

even if it wouldn't be your first idea.

He smiles at Conrad.

So I'm going to go to Motor City,

and while you're saving this

rainy old, crummy old town
(inspiring music keeps building)

from that figure with the white key,

and while you're trying
to solve this mystery,

I'm going to go to Motor City
and I'm going to tell them,

while we're waiting on you,

to change our shitty pants.

(big brass horn music)
(players laughing)

- You're a hero.

- He fully weeps and salutes.

(loudly and proudly) We're
going to do something!

We're going to get the
shit out of our pants!

He starts running off to Motor City.
(players laughing)

- When we saw the eye open,
I wasn't thinking of this man

looking at his desk with
shit running down his legs.

- To be clear, it was like, Mr. Henry,

I don't think that what
we're doing is right!

Goons? Oh no! (jumping in the air)

Mind control ray?
(mimics brain scrambling)

(screams) (glass shattering)

Oh go- (mimics grappling gun firing)

(glass shattering) (fart sound) Shit!

Oh, my office!

(players laughing)

- This is all that's happened so far.

- Five episodes, that's all.

- Yes, exactly, in all these episodes,

that is the full extent
of what we have covered.

We haven't found Flight, right?

- No.
- No,

or Fawn.
- [Danielle] Or Fawn.

- You know that Fanny Fawnsworth
is at Avaricci's place.

- Flight could be in Motor City.

- True, that's where I'd be.

And look out for Flight
while you're there!

- My sister?
- [Hank] Yeah!

- All right, probably
not going to find her.

She's really good at getting away.

(players laughing)

- Especially from you.

(players laughing)

- He's like, oh, I've never
caught her a day in my life.

(players laughing)

Let's roll sneak across the board,

and we'll do highest rolls of the pairs.

- Five.

- Eight.
- Three.

- [Trapp and Alex] Six.

- [Brennan] Six, okay.
- One.

- [Brennan] One.

- [Danielle] Wait, no, that's a three.

- Okay, gotcha.

Cool cool cool.

We're actually going to
start at Cerebell Pacific.

You see Ivana, this sort of
old boxing trainer, says,

can I ask you a question

while we on way to this place over here?

(cool slow music)

Throw a punch in my hand.
Let me see how you do.

- I slap the hand.
(slapping sound)

(players laughing)

- She goes, okay, we got some work to do.

And runs off with you.

But she has that new gun in her hand.

The two of you end up
arriving at Cerebell Pacific.

How do you approach Cerebell Pacific?

- So sneakily, oh my goodness.

There's a full dark shadow
(whooshing sound)

waved across my face.

I know about a backdoor situation

since my family has this key, which is,

It's not exactly above board
that we have these keys.

It's just like we've always had them.

- [Brennan] Yeah.

- But maybe we don't want to be taking

the regular person corridors,
so I know the layout

of this place pretty well, I'm assuming.

- Yeah.

- And hopefully, I can
take us through in a way

that's not bursting in the
front door at three AM.

Excuse me, can you open your business?

I have nefarious things to do!

- Go ahead and give me
either sneak or slick

or whatever skill you think you'd be using

as you approach Cerebell
Pacific, trying to get in.

- I actually think I might use savvy.

Does that make sense? An intelligence-

- [Brennan] Go ahead
and give me savvy eight.

- Great.

Bleh, that's a four.

- With a savvy four,
thinking about a back way in,

it's hard because you,
in your normal life,

are so used to just walking
in through the front of places

and having doors open for you.

- Uh-huh.
- You know, Ivana sort of-

- I get to the front door and I just wait

for somebody else to open it.

- Ivana goes, we want
to kick the door down?

Fight our way through?

- Yeah, that sounds really great.

- She kicks the door open
(door getting kicked in)

and starts blasting.
(gun shots)

Let's go!
(gun shots)

And you see it causes a huge distraction,

which is going to bring the
difficulty down on a sneak check

for you as she rushes
into Cerebell Pacific.

Call it six.
(cool tense music)

- That's a nine! 10.
- Hey, all right!

You sneak all the way

into the heart of Cerebell Pacific.

You arrive at the room.

You look at the Switchboard.

This is the place that you came
before our story even began

where you started all of this

by grabbing those papers off the desk.

You look at the Switchboard,

and there is...

no keyhole there.

You hear a voice in
the shadows behind you.

Looking for something?

And you see the deputy chief
of staff Lance walk out

holding this last piece of machinery

that gets set into the desk,

set into the Switchboard, and connected.

- Are you looking for something?

- Hey. And he takes out a gun.

I'm always looking for something.

- Well, I'm always looking
to get into something.

- You're getting into something.

Is that something trouble, Ms. Pulse?

- Oh, I guess it depends on who's talking.

- Well, it's me.

Deputy Chief of Staff H.V. Lance.

- Yeah, well, you probably think

all kinds of things are trouble.

- That's right, I do!

Now, I know that somebody
came in here last night

and murdered Mr. Norrell Ojiccle,

but something didn't add
up, did it? Because...

- No, it didn't,

and I
(players laughing)

have a lot of suspicions about that.

- You're suspici-
So what do you got to

say about that, huh?

- Who are you suspicious of?

- Exactly! Who are you suspicious of?

- Give me a slick check.
We'll call it a difficulty 11.

- I got it.
(Brennan laughing)

- You see he goes, you're not
suspicious of me, are you?

- I'm suspicious of everybody.
(suspicious music)

Aren't you suspicious of
everybody in this town?

- Not generally myself,

but now I'm wondering if I should be.
(players laughing)

- Well, maybe think about it, huh?

(Brennan groaning in confused distress)

- You watch the brain's
sense of hypervigilance

start to turn around on himself.

He goes, the DA told me to come down here

and protect this until-
- The DA? The DA?

Don't you know these things always go

all the way to the top?
- All the way to the top?!

You're saying the mayor's a traitor?

- Actually, the mayor was
lying about who he was, but-

- (vindicated) I knew it!

- That guy was a red
herring the whole time!

- A red herring?!
- A red herring, I tell ya!

- Well, I want a normal colored herring!

- Well, you can't have one.

Not in this town, not in these days.

- Look, you can put an
anchovy on toast all you want,

but we still got a fish to catch!

- We do?
- What? What do you mean?

- I mean that there's
a killer in this town,

and I'm out to get him, see?

Or her!

- That's right, and we know
the killer, and it's you.

- No!

- You came here and turned
the key to get the packet,

and Norrell tried to
stop you, and that's when

you turned your gun on
him like the one you...

don't have right now,

but I hear it shooting
out in the hallway! You-

- I didn't kill anybody.

Yes, I used the key, and
yes, that's my right.

Look here, mister.
(pleasant light sound)

This is my key and none else's.

But I didn't kill nobody.

Norrell, he was just a kid doing a job.

- A kid doing a job? What do
you mean, a kid doing a job.

He was sitting here and he
got killed in cold blood

so that you could turn the
key in that switchboard.

- I don't need to kill
Norrell. We're old friends.

We go back. I'm of the Pulse family.

I can use the key whenever I want.

That doesn't make any
sense. Listen to yourself.

(Hank giggling, enjoying the tropes)

- No, no no.

that's what that Mayor Logic always wants,

it to make sense, but
sometimes if you wait

for things to make sense, it's too late!

- Well, there I agree with you, Mr. Lance!

There, I agree with you.
Sometimes you gotta just act.

- He leans in for a kiss.

(players laughing)

- I fully dip him.
(saucy music)

- Mwah!

(players laughing)

He goes, I've never felt
more alive in my life!

- Isn't it great? Isn't it great?

This is definitely a thing.

Hypervigilance and impulse? Absolutely.
(players laughing)

- Wow, wowie wow wow wow!

Geez Louise, okay, (panting) look.

I'm going to say, actually,

go ahead and give me slick, six.

- Yes, nine.

(beautiful romantic music)
(pressure releasing)

(players cheering in relief)

- You see that the pressure comes down

as impulse is married to
hypervigilance, and somewhere,

the big guy, changing his pants, goes,

(panting) okay!

Everything's a threat, but we have to act!

(players laughing)

As the two of you kiss

in the middle of the
communications center of the brain.

So you see Lance looks at you and says-

- I slap him across the face.

- Guh!
(slapping sound)

- How dare you, sir?

- (exhilarated and enthralled) Wow!

I'm in love!

(players laughing)

You see he goes, okay,
look, the DA told me

to come here with this
thing and not connect it.

The DA said he'd be along
with a friend in not too long,

but he had to swing by
the courthouse first, so-

- We gotta get out of
here before it's too late!

We gotta get this big man

picking up these papers
and out of this damn room!

- How are we going to get
him to pick up the papers?

- Well, the keyhole is
gone. What'd you do with it?

- No I got it right here!
- Oh! Put it on there!

- You see he goes in, slams
it into the Switchboard,

and you are once again
standing at the switchboard

at the center of Cerebell Pacific,

and have your key in your hand.

You see Ivana comes in with
the gun, slams the thing shut,

looks around and says, I
think I've done a good job

of holding most of them off.

- Again, if you want a job after this.

- I'd just like my old job back.

- Oh, that's great.
- [Brennan] For sure.

- I put the key in and I look
at hypervigilance and say,

you want to go to Vagus and
get married right after this?

(players laughing)

- Ma'am, it would be an honor.

(players laughing)

You see hypervigilance, as you say that,

you see he actually gets on
one knee, takes a ring out.

(gemstone sparkling)

- You had this this whole time?

- You gotta be ready for everything!

(group laughing)

You see you turn the
key, and you hear a hush

(light trilling)

as the microphone comes
into your hand again,

and once again, impulse is at the helm.

You hear and feel, almost, the breathing,

(heavy breathing) slow,

things coming into focus and perspective.

You feel stepping into pant legs.

(players laughing)

- Yeah, the mayor got there!

- Elias, Elias so overworked
that he has to keep

a change of clothes at
the office, steps in.

You look down and see-

- Some shitty pants on the floor.

- Some shitty pants on the floor,

but see the oculus at Cerebell Pacific

open up and see all of the
schematics on the desk.

- As I tell him what to
do, I think of Conrad,

and hopefully imbue
into him the feeling of,

this is the first time we've
ever done a good thing.

- He says, this is the first time

we've ever done a good thing.

You see hands in that slow
time of the outside world

begin to move, scoop up all of
the packets, grab them again,

and begin to shove all of
them quickly into a bag.

As you say that, that impulse of,

this is a sudden, correct thing to do,

you begin to see, lighting
up on the Switchboard,

(little bulbs popping on)

little lights that have
to do with rail signals.

(more little bulbs popping on)

But you also begin to hear
shouting outside of the door,

and you see Lance says,
that'll be the fuzz coming in.

They're mad as hell.

Someone killed the chief of police today.

- Oh boy. Well, let's get out of here.
(players laughing)

- What do you do as you're
getting ready to leave?

Your key is in this keyhole

here in the center of Cerebell Pacific.

- Can I take it out and

grab the gun

off of Ivana,

and give it back to Ivana
(Freddie cackling)

because I realize that she's
probably better at using it,

and have her shoot the Switchboard again.

- You see she says, you want me to shoot

the thing that lets you control big guy?

- Yeah.

- You are wild, lady.

(players laughing)

(gun shot)

Shoots it, and you see Lance
says, we just got a new one!

- One guy in the back is
putting his tools away.

He's like, ah!

- Come on, we just fixed that! Incredible.

- I'm going to be late coming home.

(players laughing)

- You should be lucky you have a job.

(players laughing)

- So as Ivana pulls the trigger,

you watch and see and can
feel deep in your bones,

in your own sense of impulse,
(fast tense music)

and know for a fact that what
you had stated must be true,

that no one came here to
murder Norrell Ojiccle.

Someone came here with a white key

to end Mentopolis as a city as we know it,

and instead met someone who
had prepared just in time

to blow a hole through the
keyhole and save the city.

As you and Ivana and Lance
all begin to run out of here,

you see Lance looks behind,
looks up at you and says,

well, I guess I'll confess, too.

I haven't always been
strictly legal here, either.

I snuck some paperwork into an amendment

passing through the courthouse

to requisition a bunch
of copper supplements.

And you see that he grabs your hand
(smooth romantic music)

and begins to run.

- I am in love with you.

(group laughing)

- You head out. You rush on out of there.

Now, we are going to
move to the courthouse.

We are deep in Cortex City,
(dramatic music)

and you see the vast marble
halls of a civic building.

You hear the bailiff
announce, hear ye, hear ye!

All rise for the right
honorable Judge Connie Fusion!

- The worst people in
the positions of power.

No one's where they belong.

(Brennan laughing)

- And you see this older,

very stern-looking woman sit,

sort of the judge's frock,

and as the two of you walk
in through the back door,

again, neither of you, I
think, have really been...

Well, you killed the chief
of police earlier today.

- Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
(players laughing)

Let's not forget.

- Let's not forget.

As you both walk in, you see Mark Bition

standing at the prosecutor's desk saying,

your honor, we come here today

on behalf of City Hall
and the mayor's office

requesting an emergency grant of powers.

Mayor Leon Logic has gone missing,

kidnapped by some
miscreants that we believe

may also be responsible for the
death of one Norrell Ojiccle

and various acts of vandalism
throughout our fair city.

I ask that I be granted emergency power

so that the executive function branch

can still act in this time of crisis.

You see that the judge
says, well, in the absence

of any counsel to the contrary,
the bench has no other-

of any counsel to the contrary,
the bench has no other-

- Hi!
- [Hank] (quietly) Nice.

- Hello, hi.

My name is A. Tension.

As you may know,

I am a representative
of the Daily Observer.

Hi, hello. Hi, hello.

I've come here to observe
today's daily proceedings,

I've come here to observe
today's daily proceedings,

and as well, offer counsel to you

and as well, offer counsel to you

on the proceedings that are proceeding,

because I also know law stuff.

- Hm, go ahead and give me a slick eight.

- Why would I do this?

(players laughing)

- I love that almost every NPC's response

to A. Tension has been, hm.

(players laughing)

I'm interested in hearing more.

- What was it?
- Eight.

- Uh, that would be a 10.
- Wow!

You see the judge says,
hm. Highly irregular.

Now look here, Ms. Tension.

I've been on this bench for a long time,

and let me tell you, I have no idea

what the fuck is going on, all right?

So if you're telling me
you're here representing

the Daily Observer, who
are you representing?

- Me!

I object!
(Brennan guffawing)

I hereby nominate myself!

You think that this man asked for this-

- Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry.

You nominate yourself to be
represented by your attorney?

- And, and, to take over this body!
(players laughing)

Emergency power should be granted to me!

- Okay, so wait, so Ms.
Tension, you've come here

to represent your
client, Mr. Daniel Fucks.

- Correct!

- You believe you, a speakeasy owner-

- Correct!

- [Brennan] Should be
granted emergency powers?

- A speakeasy owner, yes,
but also a man of the people.

(players laughing)

- Judge Fusion, when
you think about the way

that this beautiful, wonderful
city of ours operates,

who better to run the city than someone

who has their finger on the
pulse of this beautiful city,

as well as someone who knows
how to run an organization

and someone who could also
be equally persuasive?

- You see, I'm a businessman.

Businessmen are going to be
good at politics, because,

I don't know why, but I'm
pretty sure that's, yeah.

- He's also rich, and
rich people are fantastic!

Rich people are great at politics!

- You see that Mark says,
objection, your honor!

This man might have his
finger on the pulse,

but only accidentally,

because god knows where his finger's been!

- This is slander! I object to that!

Hearsay, slander!

- I object to that! This man is...

I said speakeasy owner!
By definition a criminal!

(players laughing)

- I object to that!

He is not merely a criminal,

he is also a fine, upstanding citizen,

and as you may know,

there are plenty of people
in this fine government

who have partaken of his services,

and maybe it's possible that
if he were looking to find

a different way to change
what happens in this city,

he could always use his
knowledge of such things.

Or he could do it above board.

- The argument that you are more electable

because you are more
corrupt than the other guy,

is like, this is good. I like this.
(players laughing)

- I know all the illegal shit! So I know

how to avoid it!
- So therefore,

I know how to avoid it!

- You see that M. Bition
goes, objection, your hon-

You see the judge

hits the gavel and says,
(gavel banging)

now look.

I can't make heads or
tails of this, all right?

So I'm going to need it plain and simple.

We'll have opening
statements from you both.

These opening statements

will also double as closing statements.

(players laughing)

We'll hear from the
prosecution first. Mr. Bition.

You see that Mark Bition
sneers at both of you and says,

(tense music)

your honor, it has been
my privilege to serve

the fine city of Mentopolis
and all of its inhabitants

for the past several years
as your district attorney.

When Mayor Logic was elected,

I was happy to prosecute and promote

his vision of a stable
and happy civilization.

The big guy, Elias Hodge,
got into the finest schools,

The big guy, Elias Hodge,
got into the finest schools,

was hired straight out of college

at none other than Gobstopper Industries,

a man on his way to the top,
getting paid top dollar.

a man on his way to the top,
getting paid top dollar.

Here, you hear him say top dollar.

He says, in order to do

what he most loves to do.

(passionately) Science!

Thanks to my actions as district attorney,

we were able to remove the
criminal riffraff off the street

and keep our people
working around the clock,

doing what Mayor Logic
had us set out to do,

which is to do science

for one of the biggest
companies in the outside world.

This achievement, this
high honor and prestige

promises a type of reward

that dull, base pleasure
could never understand.

that dull, base pleasure
could never understand.

A day is coming when
this prohibition will end

on logical terms and legal terms,

and the pleasure we know then

won't be the crass, crude itchings

of a flophouse gin joint operator

like Daniel Fucks.

It'll be the knowledge that we achieved,

and achieved greatly, and in
the absence of Mayor Logic,

I submit that one M. Bition

should be able to make the
choices for this fair city.

And I'm going to roll in the Box of Doom.

- Ooh!
- [Hank] Ooh Fuck.

- Mark Bition has a d20 in slick,

(Trapp chuckling lightly)

and I am going to say

that due to the institutional
corruption in this place,

I am going to roll 2d20
and take the higher.

- (quietly) Motherfucker.

- We don't even have
two d20s in front of us.

- That is a 14 and an 11.

The district attorney says,
I rest my case. Takes a seat.

The judge says, we'll now have a statement

from Mr. Fucks and counsel.

- Just counsel.
- Oh!

(players laughing)

- No, hold on, I had a whole
thing I was writing down!

(players laughing)

Give me like 30 seconds
at the end of yours.

- [Brennan] Incredible, incredible.

(players laughing)

- Another great pairing of Tension Fucks.

- Tension Fucks. Fucks and Tension.

So, Anastasia, you're
trying to beat a four-

First of all, what does Anastasia say

as she stands up before the judge?

- First of all, I would like to thank you

for meeting with all of us today.
(heroic courthouse music)

Judge Fusion, I understand
that you are very, very busy,

and this is a huge ask by a huge man

who is known for his ambition
and his ambition alone.

who is known for his ambition
and his ambition alone.

He is not interested in
the goodwill of this city.

He is not interested in what
is best for the big guy.

Man cannot live on ambition alone!

Yes, he has led us to our
brilliant career as a scientist,

Yes, he has led us to our
brilliant career as a scientist,

while neglecting those important urges

that every single man, woman, child-

Scratch that last one!
(music stops abruptly)

Every single person has inside of them.
(players laughing)

And while the big guy
(heroic courthouse music)

might be achieving a lot at work,

the big guy is miserable.

The reason for our prohibition

is because the big guy is
not allowed to be happy.

The big guy is not allowed
(whispers through the court)

to be happy because M. Bition

has not allowed him to be happy.

He has not allowed any of us to be happy.

In fact, if there is anything
that created a Daniel Fucks,

it was Mark and his ambition!

(Brennan gasping loudly)

- You look around at all this.

As this happens, I'm going to say go ahead

and you can give me a snoop
check right in this moment

if you would like,
difficulty of, call it a 10.

- 19.

(Hank grunts triumphantly)

- As you say that, you look

and see Mark sort of looking shocked.

In his briefcase on his desk,

you see the glimmer of a
campaign contribution check

in his briefcase right in front of you.

- And I am not done yet,
(dramatic string music)

because I would like
to submit into evidence

a surprise submission of evidence.

- You see the judge goes,
(players laughing)

ooh, surprise evidence?

(players mimic hubbub in the court)

The judge says, what would you
like to submit, Ms. Tension?

- Well, I know that the rules state

that if you're going to submit evidence,

that means that the other
party must be aware of it

and must have seen it, which
will be easy for Mr. Bition,

because that evidence is
in his very briefcase!

(Brennan gasps loudly)

(shocked hubbub in the court)

- You see Mark goes to
close his briefcase,

and you see the bailiff jam
a hand into the briefcase,

open it wide, and the check
is right in front of you.

- Mr. Bition, will you please read for us

what is on this check in my hands?

- You see he starts to sweat
and looks at it and says,

1.5 million ATP

to the reelection campaign
for one M. Bition,

signed by one Donald Avaricci.

(all mimicking outraged court hubbub)

- I'm sorry, and by who...m do you mean,

(players laughing)

- Good grammar, good
grammar, good grammar!

- Mr. Avaricci, as everyone
in the gallery knows,

is one of the largest
sources of corruption

in our fair city.

Sir, how dare you?

- Everyone within arm's reach of M. Bition

just slaps him in the face.

(successive face-slappings)
(players laughing)

So, there's a DC 14 here.

The entire courthouse is with
you. A ripple goes through.

However, you see Judge Fusion going,

I can't make heads or tails of this!

(players laughing)

So, I will say this.

We are going to mirror the boxing match

from before, but this time flipped.

You could almost never get to a 14.

What's your slick die again?

- Oh god, it is 10 plus 2, so 12.

- Oh, okay, so we are going
to roll this here as well.

What I'm going to ask is this.

We are going to set a new number

for how many of the numbers
on your slick die explode.

for how many of the numbers
on your slick die explode.

- (whispering) Yes, baby.
- And I'm going to say

because you are advocating for Daniel,

Daniel, in this moment,
is there anything you say

either to Anastasia or to
anyone else in the courtroom?

- I think I stand up and say,

I think the answer is clear here.
(heroic courthouse music)

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,

we have a very clear choice set before us.

- (whispering) There's no jury.
- Oh, right.

- I think it's just me.

- I turn away from addressing the crowd.

Everyone's confused.
Why is he talking to us?

Oh yes, yes. Judge, judge, yes yes yes.

We can see what ruinous road
that ambition has led us upon.

It is chaos outside.

Roads exploding, it's
been raining nonstop.

How many of us, turning back
to the crowd, remember the sun.

(pensive hubbub in the court)

I will simply say this.

My counsel has represented me adequately,

if not a little bit...

But here,

before us,

are two marshmallows, you see.

We could have one marshmallow now.

- Nope.
- That's me, pleasure.

That's what we get.
- Nope.

- Or you could talk maybe
two marshmallows later.

- Nope.

- But we've been waiting this
whole time! This guy sucks!

A vote for me is a vote for
a marshmallow immediately.

(Brennan laughing)

- You see someone stands up in the back

who even in the city is
wearing farmer's clothes

and is like, that second
marshmallow's never comin'!

(players laughing)

I'm going to ask for a
slick check from you.

So go ahead and roll. Let me
know the number that you roll.

- Four.
- Four.

So Anastasia, with a four on the die,

you can pick four numbers on your d10

that explode.
- Lucky numbers!

- So you can pick lucky numbers
that explode on your d10.

They can't be 10 or 1,

because 10 already explodes
and 1 is an automatic failure.

- Okay, I'm going to go with four, eight,

let's do seven,
(tense Box of Doom music)

and let's do three, fuck it.

- [Brennan] Okay, I'm going to

put the Box of Doom over there.

- Why'd I say fuck it? It's just a number.

- Three. Okay, go ahead.

Here you go, and we're
going to roll in there.

Three, four, seven, and eight all explode.

You're trying to get to 14.

- Seven.
- Okay, seven explodes!

Go ahead and roll again.

- Nine.
- Oh yeah, that's nine.

- Nine doesn't explode?
- Nine doesn't explode.

- But hold on, so wait,
what do you add to slick?

- Plus two.
- Oh, plus two.

- So 11 plus 7, you
roll an 18, beats a 14!

Hell yes!

You see, go ahead, I'll
take the Box of Doom back.

- After that speech, if you let her fail-

- [Hank] I know!
- I would've been so mad.

(players laughing)

- That's not how it works.
- Not how it works.

You see, that,

You see Judge Connie Fusion looks down

at you holding the check, looks
at M. Bition sweating there,

and you see she says...

I'll also point one thing out,

because now that we're
back down in the green,

one more Moxie would put you

at five over.

The judge looks at you and
says, now, I'll be honest.

I come into work every day

having no clue,
(Siobhan giggling)

how this city functions.

But the raw, unfiltered, unmitigated,

But the raw, unfiltered, unmitigated,

beyond impressive moxie
of this one reporter

who, if I'm not much mistaken,
has no formal background

as a lawyer or attorney in this fair city.

(light hubbub in the court)

- She called laws rules!

(players laughing)

- Okay, well technically,
there are rules of court.

I will not get into my paralegal shit.

(players laughing)

- Wait, you're a paralegal in real life?

- Yes.

(players laughing)

Before my day job when
I was doing standup,

I was a paralegal.
- Incredible.

You see that she looks at you and says,

this court rules unequivocally
in favor of the defense!

- Ay.
(gavel bangs)

Daniel Fucks is awarded emergency powers!

- (triumphant) Finally!

(players laughing)

- [Brennan] That's the
client. That is the client.

- That's what I do.
- We just put our pants on!

(group laughing)

- And with that stunning argument,

as well as that final push

to get all the way to an
incredible 19, you see she says,

and due to this highly irregular behavior,

bailiff, please place the DA under arrest!

Bum bum buh!
(gavel bangs)

And you watch the bailiff
grab M. Bition, and he says,

(grunting and straining)

A. Tension, you'll never
get away with this.

Not in this city!

- I just did.

(players laughing)

- And he is marched off.
Anastasia, you have won the case.

- As he's being dragged
off, I whisper to the judge,

I bet you he killed the chief of police.

(players laughing)

- Give me a DC 12 slick check.

- I'm just saying!
- [Alex] Whisper

to a judge.
- [Trapp] That makes sense.

He's rich.

- Six.
- [Brennan] Six? (laughing)

(players laughing)
(ball sliding on a track)

- Does that mean Daniel Fucks gets a key,

or just he has the ability
to access keyholes.

What do the emergency powers mean?

- [Brennan] The conscious mind of

Elias Hodge doesn't need-
- Oh no.

- There's two antagonists this time.

(players laughing)

- In other words, with no
key, you would have to go

to City Hall and do the job of the mayor

and talk with people and pass legislation.

- So the real victory
is keeping Mark Bition

from having emergency powers,

not necessarily the power
that is now granted.

- Don't worry.
- From your perspective.

(players laughing)

- For the rest of this, Elias
has a little bit of a chub.

(players laughing)

- Raise to half-mast!
- Elias gets through-

Well, I think it makes perfect sense,

because Imelda just went like,

you're doing the first
good thing in your life!

And all of a sudden he's like,

(horny) yeah, this fucking rules!

(players laughing)

So as you both walk out of the courthouse,

what do you do as you
see people filing out?

- Well, there's another
key, or another keyhole

that's specifically just
for the mayor to use

for the microphone in the mayor's office.


Mayor Fucks.

- Oh, I like the ring of that.

- How would you feel about
going back to your office.

And that way, we can protect
that so that no one else

is obviously able to make any
announcements, and if you...


(Brennan laughing)


Um, I will make the announcement,
(Siobhan laughing)

I will make the announcement
that we now have

a new mayor.
- Ah, as my vice mayor!

- As the two of you begin
walking through the halls

of the courthouse and get
down towards the steps

headed back towards City Hall,

as you start making your plan,

you hear a voice behind you say,

oh, a lot of...

A lot of plans here, huh?
(tense mafia music)

And you see yourself suddenly
flanked by gangsters.

- (quietly) Palookas.

- [Brennan] Palookas.

- Two palookas, three goons.

(players laughing)

- Walking out of the shadows, you see one

Don Avaricci.

Well, it seems that you saw
fit to air my dirty laundry

Well, it seems that you saw
fit to air my dirty laundry

in front of the entire courthouse.

I can't say I find it very amusing.

Daniel Fucks, congratulations.
- Oh, thank you.

- Congratulations on
your emergency powers.

Before you head to City Hall,

I'd love to invite you to a conversation

at my estate outside
of the Hypothalamuseum.

Chaáteaux Appetit has many amenities.

I suggest you come with me.

- You can get in contact
with my assistant.

- He puts a hand on
your shoulder and says,

why don't you come with me right now.

- This feels like the kind of thing

I don't necessarily have a choice in.

- Oh, have I finally got your attention.

Very good.

Get 'em in the car, boys!

(players laughing)

You see you are thrown into the back

of one of these black town cars

that's been pursuing you for so long.

- Just once in my life,

I want to be able to say that sentence.

Get them in the car, boys! Just on-!

I don't know how the scenario
can get there, but like,

- You, follow that cab!
- I know, right? That one too!

- [Brennan] Incredible.
- I do love that these cars

have been following us since the very...

They're so slippery!

- The mileage logged
that they're submitting.

- You see Charlie Hungry,
there's a bunch of bullet holes

in the side of the car, and he's like,

what a day it has been.

(players laughing)

Mark Bition is in jail, but you did come

to one of the big, central civic places

where these gangsters have
known to look for you.

You go into the back
of the car and you see,

sitting across from you,
those seats that face the back

almost limousine-style,
the Don sits down and goes,

(jazzy horn music)

attention and pleasure.

The mayor is gone, and
Mark Bition is in jail.

Feels like high time we
talked about the direction

this fair city is headed in.

I understand your friend Imelda Pulse

has seen fit to get us to
grab these papers again,

has seen fit to get us to
grab these papers again,

papers that our friend Mr. Bition

wanted to return to the
muckety-mucks and higher-ups.

Well, Mr. Bition looks like
he's going to the big house

for a while, but you know,

those schematics might be worth something.

(laughs sinisterly)

- Well, our current thought

was that we would take the schematics,

so perfect, we're on the same page.

- It seems we are.

Tell me, what do you know
about Conrad Schintz.

- (in wonderment) Conrad Schintz.

(players laughing)

- Wait, give me a slick check.

(players laughing)

Yeah, give me a slick check.

Are you trying to be like
you don't know Conrad?

- Yep.

(players laughing)

Ah dammit.

Why do I keep going for slick.
- Difficulty of seven.

- Oh god.

Okay, well that's six plus
two, so that is eight.

- You don't know about Conrad Schintz?

You're a reporter. I would assume-

- Who?

- Now, you're going to have to give me

a slick check here as well.

Oh, my die explodes.

Okay, 12.

- You've done nothing but scream about

how he's your mortal enemy.
- Two!

- [Alex] Oh no.

(players laughing)
(ball sliding on a track)

- You see he says, oh.

So you don't know the little kid

that puts a notice on your

door every
- Oh, that piece of shit!

- [Brennan] Fucking day?
- I hate that-

- You see he grabs your head and he says,

all right, soften him up, boys!

And the car peels out.
(players laughing)

- Second time today!

(players laughing)

- You've gotten your
ass kicked by every end

of the legal spectrum.
- [Freddie] Just handed to me.

Okay, and we are going to move from there

back down to the sort of gothic spires

of Madam Loathing's Home
for Wayward Interests.

- I bought a bunch of sweets on the way.

- Aw.
(dour, dreary music)

- I also brought some,
but I've eaten half of it.

(players laughing)

What's inside this one?

- Timing-wise, where are we

in terms of the other stuff happening.

- This is all sort of
happening simultaneously.

- I was wondering if when
Imulda Pul- Imelda Pulse

says this is the first
thing we've ever done,

if something happens to Conrad.

- Yes, I believe it does, but
that has not happened yet,

so we'll run the first part of this,

and then that will occur partway through.

So with some candy,

you arrive at Madam Loathing's
Home for Wayward Interests.

(mimics thunder) Rain falling.
(rain falling)

As you approach, you see Justin

sort of looks like a sad
dog. (whimpers nervously)

- We haven't been back
here in a while, huh, boy?

- I don't like this place at all.

- It's okay. We're a little different now.

- [Brennan] That's right, that's right.

And you begin to approach the door.

- I knock, but it's too
hard. Like I didn't mean to.

- [Brennan] Yeah.
(players laughing)

(Brennan mimics door pounding)
(metal door being hit)

- Jesus.

(players laughing)

- The door opens,
(door creaking open)

and you see Madam Loathing (sneers softly)

Fix, what do you wan...


Quite a few of you here, eh?

- Hello, Madam Loathing.

Again, I appreciate you
taking care of these children

despite the fact that
you hate it and them.

These are my friends.
(players laughing)

You know Conrad, of course.

Justin, go ahead and
give some of those kiddos

a lickin' there, that'd be real cute.

- I'll go find the kids
and give them a lickin'!

You see Justin runs in.
Hey, kids! (panting)

You see she looks up and
says, (groan) damn dog!

(players laughing)

- This is Detective Hunch
Curio. He's a real disaster.

- I also brought chocolates.

I ate all the ones I weren't
sure what was inside,

but there's a smattering of coconut

(players laughing)

and some chocolate nougat.

- Everyone's favorites, detective.

- Another case well done.

(players laughing)

- You see that she says, well,

what is it you want, and
why have you brought...

you see she says...


- Ma- Madam.

- Oh.

Have you come back to deposit
this wayward interest?

- Oh, certainly not. Shut the fuck up.

(players laughing)

Look, if you're not
going to be nice to me,

I'm not going to be nice to you.

This is how it's going to
go. That's how it works.

- Where have you achieved this
sudden sense of reciprocity.

- A lot- A lot's happened.

I don't really know
who I work for anymore,

so I'm just sort of working for myself.

It's real weird.
Uncomfortable, but kind of fun.

I would like to talk to
two of your children.

First, Bastion Bass. I think
he's like 14 years old.

He plays bass guitar all the time.

I'd like to just have
him play music, maybe.

I've heard that low frequency
noises can be relaxing.

- You see, that

over in the corner, you see there's a kid

who's like,

(like a pissed off teen)
whatever, I'll play it.

(players laughing)

(Brennan does a funky bass lick)

He starts playing this big standup bass.

(Trapp snaps rhythmically)

(players laughing)
(chill bass music)

Who else do you wish to speak to?

- I'd like to speak to Ronnie Reptile,

and then you can just
listen to the bass guitar

and see if you can take
it down a couple notches.

(players laughing)

- Very well.

She says, do you want me to
show you to where Ronnie is?

- Where's Ronnie at? Oh, sorry, Conrad.

- I could probably show you guys there.

Conrad hasn't unclenched his fists since-

(players laughing)

We'll find our own way,
if you don't mind, Madam.

- Very well, Conrad.

I'll stay here and enjoy the bass music.

That's what everyone loves,

is just a bass playing by itself.

(players laughing)

- I mean, if you listen to him,

I mean, he's got some chops here!

(Trapp snapping and scatting)

- Incredible, so she's like, Mr. Curio,

if you would like to stay with me?

(sounds of consideration)

- No.

(players laughing)

- I can't blame you. I don't
want to stay with you either.

- I mean, the music's great.

I gotta know what Ronnie's going to say.

- The Fix, at least, I know,
and you're just a stranger.

- Sure, yeah, this would probably be

an awkward conversation.

- Maybe you can snoop around
a little, I say quietly.

(players laughing lightly)

- So the two of you head
off, and as you do so,

you go up the staircase, you
stay with Madam Loathing,

sort of paying attention
to, there's a lot of stuff

down in this entryway
and things like that.

- Yeah, I think as a general rule,

whenever Hunch enters a
new place, he just starts,

the equivalent- just
like opening cabinets,

just sort of lookin' through shit.

- You're snoopin' around.

You two go upstairs and
quickly find Ronnie's room,

and you see Ronnie's got his
little reptile head there.

You see he looks up and goes, Mr. Fix!

- Ronnie!

- He gives you a big hug
and he says, did you know

that the black mamba has
been observed at top speeds

of 12 1/2 miles per hour
at its fastest slither,

and that at that speed, it
would almost certainly catch

even some of the fastest
humans on the planet?

- I did not know that.

- [Brennan] Mm-hm, mm-hm, mm-hm.

- I love new facts.

- Even faster people would
probably not have the stamina,

because the resting or average
speed is 7 1/2 miles per hour

which is faster than the
human average of six,

and that's for healthy adults.

(Freddie laughing lightly)

- You know so much stuff.

- You see he gives you a
big hug at this. Conrad!

- Hey, kid.

- [Brennan] It's good to see
you again. How are you doing?

- [Alex] Good. How are you?

- [Brennan] I'm good. We
miss you around the home.

- I miss you guys, too.
How has it been over here?

- It's been okay. Honestly,
it's been kind of nice.

Madam Loathing's sort of, you know,

been not as bad as always.

We kind of, you know, whenever
she's sort of not around,

it's easier for us to not
get, you know, bullied.

- Has Madam Loathing not
been around much lately?

- Yeah, she's been away
for a little while,

more often than usual, and
we've been doing some stuff

that we didn't used to get to do.

Like we went on a fun field
trip to Cerebell Pacific.

- Who took you to do that?
- [Brennan] Madam Loathing did.

- Oh, okay.

- Well, Ronnie, do you know where she goes

when she's not around?

- I asked her one time,

and she sneered and raised
up a big clawed hand,

and she kind of got bigger
than she was a second before.

She said little boys who ask questions

have terrible fates befall them.

(Hank laughing)

- While this conversation is going on,

can I check Madam Loathing's eyes?

- As you are about to go
check Madam Loathing's eyes,

you hear off in the corner,

bing, bang!
(metal clanging)

Some big crashes, and you hear (barking)

and you hear a bunch of kids going, yay!

(stock audio of children cheering)

(players laughing)

And Madam Loathing goes, ugh!

(threateningly) Don't you snoop around.

And runs off to go to the noise

of the dog and the children playing.

Do you do anything in that moment?

- So Madam Loathing just
left to go after the noise?

- Go after the noise, and you're out here

in the entryway with Bastion
Bass playing bass off in the-

- That rules. Can I...

I mean, I'm snooping. I'm
poking into everything.

Can I just do a sort of general-

- [Brennan] Yeah, give me snoop seven.

- Sure.

That is an...

a 12.
- Ooh,

beat it by five.

You're looking around at
different photographs,

these creepy, old, almost Victorian,

daguerreotype type of photos,

and you see a photo
(tense music)

and recognize someone in the
photo who is not a child,

someone you met for the
first time earlier today.

You see Madam Loathing, what
looks like her as much younger.

You see Madam Loathing, what
looks like her as much younger.

She's in a portrait that is
very clearly a family portrait,

and she has her arm
around a massive, hulking,

and she has her arm
around a massive, hulking,

dangerous-looking man with
giant, musclebound arms,

tons of tattoos, and a big, square jaw

that looks like it can
take a lot of punches.

- Self Doubt?
- [Brennan] Self Doubt.

- Okay.
- Just the two of them?

- It looks like there
are some parents there,

but it looks like those two are siblings.

- Got it. Okay.

- Bastion looks over and says,

something caught your eye over there?

- Yeah, just looking at
the beautiful family.

- Beautiful family? (scoffs)

(dismissively) Whatever.

(more slick bass music)
(players laughing)

You see he says, yeah.
That's, like, her relative.

Her brother or whatever that's,
like, by here sometimes.

Their family name is,
like, their first name.

So it's like...

- Ahh.
- Self Loathing and Self Doubt.

- [Brennan] Yeah.
- Yeah.

- You had asked that question
about Madam Loathing's eyes,

but you hear that it's
gotten a little bit quieter.

You see some of the kids are
running out of the hallway,

but Madam Loathing

has not come back.
(children's footsteps)

- Got it. Can I go to
Madam Loathing's room?

- [Brennan] Yeah.
- Great.

- You go to walk to Madam Loathing's room.

For you two upstairs talking to Ronnie,
(eerie static)

is there anything that
you are doing up here?

- We, I assume, have that place mat.

- [Brennan] Yes, you do. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Oh yeah, here.

- Yes, we heard that you went to Cerebell.

A friend of ours had this.

We thought it might be yours.
(investigative music)

- You see Ronnie says, that was mine!

I made a drawing of a reticulated python,

which is actually the longest,

did you know it's the
longest snake in the world?

It's not the biggest. The
biggest is the anaconda.

But the longest is the reticulated python.

- Do you know what the longest
animal in the world is?

- No! What is it?
- It's the bootlace worm.

- Is that a reptile?
- It's a worm!

It's not a reptile.
It's still a cool fact.

- But that's close. That's a
cool fact, that's pretty close.

(players laughing)

- Clearly not interested.

(players laughing)

- Honestly, interacting with kids,

whenever you're interacting with kids,

there needs to be one
moment where you're like,

and here's something, too!

And the kid just glazes
over and is like, whatever!

- Sorry! Wait, wait!

Sorry that's not a reptile.

- I actually want to make sure, I believe

the reticulated python
(very focused typing)

is the longest snake in the world.

(players laughing lightly)

- Boy, if you get this wrong.

- I don't have that one in my head.

- Get in the comments!
(Um, Actually music sting)

- Yeah, reticulated python!

Okay, we're good, we're good, we're good.

- Good. Always fact check.
- Always fact check.

He says, yeah, that place
mat I gave to the nice man

on the field trip.
- That's awesome.

Did you see anything interesting
while you were there?

- Yeah, we saw the Switchboard,

and Madam Loathing

was asking a bunch of
questions on our behalf,

because she said our
questions would be... stupid.

(players laughing lightly)

- That sounds like her.

- So Madam Loathing wanted
to be at Cerebell Pacific.

- [Brennan] That's right.

- Do you go on many field trips?

- No, just one.

- You've been on one field trip.

- And Nostalgia's Diner.

- Oh yeah, the...

We didn't go to Nostalgia's Diner,

but the guy who works there
at Nostalgia's comes by

and gives us paper to draw
on as a donation to the home.

- Old place mats.

(players laughing)

I guess that's still nice.

- Do you remember his name, Ronnie?

- He didn't say.

But I know that he likes to talk

about the way things used to be,

and I guess all the kids
at the home are things

that the big guy doesn't
care about anymore.

- For now, buddy.

Did you know that there are some reptiles

that have a light-sensing
organ on the top of their head

so they can sense shadows

that might be coming from
something that's coming for them?

(Brennan gasps innocently)

It's like a third eye!

- As you say that,

you watch as that appears


on Ronnie's head, and he goes,
(Hank laughing)

(innocent gasp)

(sudden tense music)

(hauntingly) there's a shadow downstairs.

- Oh my god.

- That gave me fucking goosebumps.

- (laughing) Ronnie, you're terrifying.

(players laughing)

- Don't forget this
boy has a reptile head.

- He's got a full snake head.

- I forgot, you do this
to me all the time.

- [Brennan] We cut downstairs.

- (silly) Doopity doop doop do.

(players laughing)

Still listening to the
music through the walls.

- I didn't bring my copper gun.

I don't know, if it doesn't
matter, we'll find out.

(Alex and Hank laughing lightly)

- (gravely) You go into
Madam Loathing's room

and see a towering figure of shadow.

- Wuh-oh.

(players laughing)

- With a blinding white key.
(light thrumming)

(Hank rage-slamming
his notebook and fists)

(players laughing)

- I thought we'd be safe here!

- [Siobhan] The one place
that doesn't have a gun.

- The one place that
doesn't have a copper gun.

- I instinctively reach
for where I had the gun.

Agh, A. Tension!

(players laughing)

- With a blinding white
key, it takes the key

as you open the door, reaches back,

and plunges the key right into the heart

of Justin the dog.
(all screaming)

- [Hank] You said the dogs

don't get hurt!
- You son of a bitch!

- I told ya.

(menacingly) I'm gonna kill that dog!

(players laughing)

The key plunges (painful wailing)
and you see the dog shift,

change (grotesque wailing)
(bones cracking)

and mold and change in shape (snarls)

into a snarling German Shepherd
as Madam Loathing says,

into a snarling German Shepherd
as Madam Loathing says,

I'm going to need you to find some reasons

for us to hate ourselves
as much as we can.

for us to hate ourselves
as much as we can.

(Brennan growls)

Justin prowls towards you and says,

it doesn't make any sense
for us to be curious

about a world as bad as this one.

- Is there anything copper in the room?

Is there ornamentation?

This is an old, kind of gothic place.

- Give me a snoop check, difficulty 14.

- Okay.

I explode.

- [Alex] Ah!
- [Hank] Ooh!

So that is a 12 plus 9, is 21.

- There is a copper pipe

right next to you,

(players cheering victoriously)

(laughing) in the wall.

- I reach it and I...

Am I within reach of the guy with the key?

- You see that that figure
is fully Madam Loathing.

Madam Loathing, holding the key,

has transformed into this figure.

- Am I within reach of her?
- Yes, you are.

- All right, I try to just- I,

hit her across the head
with the copper pipe.

- Okay, I'm going to need a sharp check,

and she is going to
resist it with a sturdy.

- Okay.
- She only rolls a three.

However, Justin's going to jump in the way

and try to bite your arm.
- Reasonable.

(Trapp laughing)

- And he only rolls a four.
- Okay.

- So you're going to have to beat

a four and a three on two
successive sharp checks.

- Am I with him? I'm not with-

- You're upstairs with Ronnie,

but you guys hear the
commotion downstairs.

- So just being clear,
the sharp check is...

- Getting past Justin.
- [Trapp] Just getting passed-

okay, cool.
- And then,

and then getting to Madam Loathing.

- Copy, okay, so two different rolls here?

- [Brennan] Two different rolls.

You've got to beat a
four on the first one,

and a three on the next one.

- All right, here's the first one.

That is a three, but I'm
going to use a Moxie,

and we're in the green, so
only one will be needed.

That'll bring it up to four.

- All right, you bypass Justin.

- [Trapp] Sorry, no, I don't even need to.

That's plus two on my sharp roll.

- Okay, great.
- So that's actually a five.

- [Brennan] Great.
- Okay.

And now this is my
swinging at Madam Loathing.

- [Brennan] Yeah.

- That is a four plus two for a six.

- Six, okay, so Hunch
Curio, you are standing here

looking at the fucking
face of evil and go,

(snaps) copper pipe!

What a curious thing to find here!

(tense string music)

Justin sails past you and you,

bam, connect, gah!
(hitting) (bones crunching)

and you hear a crack of bone
in Madam Loathing's forearm

as you deliver an injury to her.

And you hear her say in response to that,

looking at you, looking at the pipe,

she looks at Justin and screams, where!

Where is a keyhole! Where
is a place to put the key!

- Justin, having been with you

for the rest of the conversation,

give me a sturdy check to
see how scared Loathing is.

give me a sturdy check to
see how scared Loathing is.

- Okay.

- You want high here. You
want to get an 11 or higher.

- 11 or higher on a sturdy check,
- [Brennan] Sturdy check.

- Okay.

That is a 15.

- All right, so she is terrified.

So you see Justin snarls,

and she says, where is
a place for the keyhole!

And you see Justin goes,
Oblongata Station, and...

And before he can say that
there's another location,

she leaps to go for the window.

At this point, however,

we're going to resolve a
couple different things.

- Right.

- So she's going to roll a
sneak check, first and foremost.

She rolls an 11 on a sneak check.

All three of you can attempt
to beat an 11 on a sneak check

to try to beat her to the punch

before she leaps through the window.

- With sneak?
- [Brennan] With sneak, yes.

- Well, I explode on a four.
- On a four, okay.

- Nope.

- That's just a seven. I
can't get to 11 with that.

- Seven.

(ball sliding on a track x4)

- Okay, seven.

You see Loathing, on that sneak check,

has that white key,
hears Oblongata Station,

sneers at you and says,
catch me if you can!

And goes through the window.
(bursting through glass)

As she does that, does everyone
remember what they rolled?

- Just now for the sneak?
- [Brennan] Just now for the sneak.

- Seven.
- Seven.

- [Brennan] Seven and seven here.
- I rolled a five.

- Rolled a five. Okay, gotcha.

Fix and Hunch, you're going to go first.

I'm going to say that you two
have just arrived down here,

running down the stairs towards the noise.

Conrad, you see Justin turn
to look at you and say,

this mind is a terrible place.

So weak! Why couldn't we
do the right thing? Ever?!

There's no reason to like
any part about this city!

(sad, tense music)

- Conrad doesn't say anything back.

- Fix and Hunch.

- I am going to...

I'm going to take the copper pipe

and try to basically
bridle Justin with it,

get it in his mouth
and sort of keep him...

- I see him doing that,
and I try and hold the body

while he heads for the head.

And I say, you're- you're
not you. He's not him.

- I can roll for this
if I have to, and then

I want to whisper into his
ear, who's your best friend.

- Aww.

A combination of copper and sentiment.

(players laughing)

- Yes, amazing, so you whisper that.

I'm going to say right now,
determine between yourselves,

we need a sharp check to restrain the dog,

and I think we also need a...

We do need a slick check

for trying to convince Justin to turn.

- Sure.

- One of you give me sharp,
one of you give me slick.

- Those are my two weakest attributes.

- Sharp is my most powerful, slick is d8.

- [Trapp] Okay.

- So I'm going to say probably
sharp here and slick here.

- [Trapp] Okay.

- Because you're the one who said it.

- What's your-
- My slick's my d4.

- [Hank] Your slick is your d4.

- Yeah. I got a bit of Moxie, though.

And easier to explode on a d4

than any other die, right guys?

(players laughing nervously)

- Justin is going to roll
to resist being captured.

He's going to roll a d20.

I'll roll it in front of the board.


- Ooh, six.

I guess I'll burn two Moxie.

- Okay.
- And I'll do my slick check.

- [Brennan] The DC here
is going to be a 13.

- Okay, here we go. We're hoping
for a bunch of explosions.

That is a one.

I don't think that's even worth
burning the Moxie on there.

But I'll take those.
(ball sliding on a track x2)

- You just watch as you
get down on top of Justin,

and Hunch, you say,
remember your best friend.

You see Justin snarling,
frothing at the mouth

with these blinding white eyes,

just going, a best friend
would've helped you.

A best friend would've made things right.

How could I have a best friend
if my life is like this?

- Conrad can't look away,
but has just shut down.

- So since we did restrain him, can we-

- [Brennan] Yes, you can-
- Get the pipe in his mouth?

Is there an amount of, we can
get this dog in a situation

where we don't have to
worry about it anymore?

- Potentially. Potentially you could.

But you know that Justin's
also a powerful...

- [Hank] Dog.

- I look over to Conrad. I
think it's going to mean more

coming from you than from me!

I told him he was my best
friend already earlier today,

and he, he kind of shot me down.

I think it's gotta come from you.
(players laughing)

- Even the old Justin didn't
think I was his best friend.

- Justin! Justin!
(Brennan growls)

I don't care what they did to
you. You're my best friend.

You're my best friend!

Conrad grabs Justin with both arms.

- Gonna ask for a roll here.

- (quietly) Yeah, I thought so.

(players laughing)

- Behind my back, can
I be signaling to Hunch

to give me the copper pipe.

(players laughing)

- [Hank] Oh no.
- I'm going to say you reach.

Give me a sneak check
as you start reaching.

- Okay.

13 plus 2, 15.

- You start to reach with your hand open,

and on a 15,

very high roll,

you think about all the
hidden places in Mentopolis

that you have hidden things before.

All the things you stole and hid away

from a mind that wanted to forget them,

and you and you alone as a kid

felt the responsibility to
take these things that mattered

so that they wouldn't always be forgotten.

Reaching back in this place,

what is Conrad reaching for.

Maybe not even specifically,
but what is Conrad reaching for

and what is he hoping for in this moment.

(tense music slowly building)

- Conrad's just reaching for something

that'll remind Justin and
maybe the big guy who he is.

- You reach and feel

a piece of metal in your hand.

You feel it. You have
what you're looking for.

And you look and see
Justin turn and go (snarls)

and you see his blinding white eyes,

and then there in the center of his chest

is a little white hole, a little slit,

like you saw in Mark Bition's chest.
(static thrumming)


- I take whatever metal is in my hand,

and I just plunge it into the white hole.

- Everything becomes

blinding light,

and you look up and see the piece of metal

that you assumed was
the copper, but Hunch,

you're still holding
the copper in your hand.

Both of you watched Conrad's hand

disappear into shadow behind him,

the deep, dark shadows
all over Mentopolis,

Conrad, an urchin who's
been hiding for so, so long,

seeing his dog, he's your best friend,

and even when he's like
this, there's a part of you

deep down that knows
that you still love him.

Even when he's hurting,
even when he's angry,

and even when he's angry
because he's really scared,

you still love him, and
you tap into that thing

that maybe is the center of your heart,

the love you have for this
dog, your best friend,

the center of whatever this conscience is.

You take the metal, plunge it

into Justin's chest,
(static sizzling)

and the room fills with light.

(Brennan makes the sound
of light surging out)

All of you watch
(light humming)

as a ice skate

in Conrad's hand

surges forward,

the point (wails) jabs,

the metal glows bright,
(pleasant light sound)

the ice skate breaks and falls apart,
(simple shattering)

and the metal in your hand

(magical movement, materialization)

turns into a brilliant, silvery key.

Justin, (choking) the
froth leaves. (whines)

You can feel in that lock,

locking something safe away.

This dog will never be uncertain

This dog will never be uncertain

about how much you love him.

(Brennan whimpers)

The floppy jowls and long
ears of a basset hound return.

(pained whining)

- Justin!
- I'm so sorry!

- Justin, no, don't apologize.
You're my best friend!

(saying "you're my best friend"
emotionally back and forth)

(Brennan slurping)
(players laughing)

- That was fucking weird, right?

(players laughing)

- The Fix jumps out of the window.
(glass shattering)

(players laughing)

- Stop doing that!

- Everything seems to be good
here! I gotta get that bitch.

(players laughing)

- Yeah, The Fix, Madam Loathing's
charging down the street.

- Okay, let's take the car.
- Okay!

(players laughing)

- Incredible, and you do see, yeah,

so the ice skate is broken,

and one of the metal
things has become this key.

You see, even, a small, silvery lanyard.

You're looking at a key.

You have a key. You can
tell this is your key.

And as you begin to charge
out of there, Hunch,

you do see the rest of the
ice skates as that memory

still sitting on the ground
there in front of you.

- I take the ice skates with
me, and also the copper pipe.

- You grab the copper pipe, and I'll say,

as you're running with the ice
skates that have now broken,

you see them, kind of in the shadow,

meld and morph and change.
(light coruscating)

This memory that was kept as
this object that Conrad found

turns back,

and you suddenly see,
(magic shimmer)

you're holding a book in your hand.

It is the oldest, chopped
up, dog-eared old book,

and you see it says, please
return to the memory bank,

and it lists a date that's
like 13 years ago, essentially.

- There's going to be some
late fees on this one.

(players laughing)

- Incredible. You rush out.

Cutting from there to
(sick retrofuturistic music)

Imelda, Ivana, and Lance

running from Cerebell Pacific,
having given the order

to pick up the papers and
blown that new switch,

where do you think Imelda is heading now.

Also with the understanding that yes,

you did blow up the keyhole,

but the phones are actually working again.

- Okay, great.
- Where do you think

Imelda would head off to with Ivana.

- Weren't we talking about
going to the station?

- [Brennan] Maybe you're just
heading right to the station?

- Yeah, I think so.
- Cool, so you guys get there.

You're heading right to Oblongata Station,

and then you're following Madam Loathing,

and then Conrad, Justin, and Hunch,

you're all getting in the car

to kind of do the same thing, correct?

- I think we're also chasing
after Madam Loathing, but-

- Unless there'll be a faster way.

If you see me, pick me
up. That would be great.

- The Fix running in
the street. Fix, get in!

(Trapp chuckling)

- We don't even brake, we just scoop,

- It seems like my ploy
to have a bass player

calm the big guy down hasn't worked,

unless you'd like me
to roll for something.

- No, I, well okay-

Actually, you give me a sneak check here

as you're pursuing Madam Loathing.

- I'm not very sneaky.
- Then I'll get a snoop

from the two of you to
try to find The Fix.

- A six.
- [Brennan] Okay, six.

- What are we trying to beat? Just six?

- [Brennan] You're trying
to beat a six, yeah.

- I got a six. Actually, I got an eight.

- Got an eight? Okay.

So you see,
(ball sliding on a track)

some Moxie for The Fix,

and Madam Loathing vanishes into the dark.

However, you know she's on
foot and you have a car,

so as Conrad wheels back
around, Justin goes, (barks)

Fix, get in!

- All right! Love to
hear your voice, buddy.

That one, not the other one.

- I'm sorry. I'm going to have
to unpack that experience.

I mean I know that it
was very bad for you,

but in a whole other
different sort of way,

it was quite bad for me as well.

- Conrad locks eyes and just goes,

take as much time as you need, buddy.

(players laughing)

(Brennan whimpering appreciatively)

- And you peel off.
(tires screeching)

You see Justin just wrestling with, boy,

it's really good I ended
up with conscience,

because any other concept

with justification at its
side could get so bad.

(players laughing)

Yeah, his alternate life as a
war dog is very frightening.

(players laughing)

We are actually going to cut now,

'cause we have Ivana, Imelda, and Lance

racing from Cerebell Pacific
towards Oblongata Station.

From Madam Loathing's Home
for Wayward Interests,

The Fix, Justin, Hunch, and Conrad

are all barreling there as well.

And behind the Hypothalamuseum

is the Chaáteaux Appetit,

a place of finery and riches

where we see drinks being served,

and Dan and Anastasia,

you are marched in here

and seated in these
very comfortable chairs,

but still surrounded by goons.

You've had the shit kicked out of you

a little bit in the seat on the way here.

(vaguely threatening but good mob music)

- Bleeding all over the leather.

- Yeah, you see he tosses you
a little silk handkerchief.

Clean yourself up, Fucks.

- That's Mayor Fucks to you.

- Well, well, well, I seem to recall

something about emergency
powers being granted,

and I'm not sure how much of
an emergency we're really in.

At this moment, I will say, though,

with Madam Loathing on her way,
pressure does build back up.

- [Alex] No.
- That's the opposite of what

I was trying to do.

(sound of something ramping up)

- All the way to 90.

And I will say, too, at this moment,

racing on your way there,


you feel a...
(slight humming of light)


and you can hear
reverberating in your key,

almost like a frequency,
(light ringing slowly)

you hear Imelda's voice saying...

- [Siobhan] (echoing)
This is the first time

we've ever done a good thing.

- And I'll leave it to you.
What happens with Conrad.

What does Conrad feel in that moment?

- Conrad feels like he might
be an inch or two taller,

and I'll leave it up to you if
that's just a feeling or not.

- I don't think it is.

I think as you hear
Imelda's voice in the key,

both of you watch as Conrad-
- Head rising.

- I think Conrad, you
have to kick the bricks

off the gas pedal because your legs

grow a little bit longer.

- Weird. I don't brake, but
I'm like, gotta adjust this.

- The mirrors all change.
(players laughing)

- Hell yeah, hell yeah.

- Hunch is in the
backseat and just watches

Conrad's head just slowly

rise above the seat rest.
(neck cracking and stretching)

What the fuck?

(players laughing)

- Just an inch or two.

- Just an inch or two. Just a little bit.

Back at Avaricci's, you
see he looks and says,

emergency powers only
qualify in an emergency,

and sooner or later, the big
guy's going to get out of here.

He already grappled his way to safety.

Now we have some decisions to make,

so Mr. Fucks, I've got
to tell you somethin'.

I love the idea of working with you.

Does that sound like something
we could maybe do together?

Go into business?

- What do you mean? I am
generally a lone operator.

Sole proprietorship, as it were.

- You're a lone operator because...

a businessman like myself

has to make due with
the situation as it is,

and Mr. Bition, the district attorney,

was happy to turn his eye the other way.

You know, the big guy's making money.

Bition stays off my tail.

All's well.

But given that we just
almost got murdered,

it seems like the flow of money

in old Elias Hodge's bank account

might come to a sudden stop,
you understand what I'm saying?

So we need to reevaluate,

'cause Mark Bition's
going away for a while.


what if we were greedy for other things?

You know, Elias could
grab those schematics,

sell them to Gobstopper's competitor,

and pay for a lot of
good times, Mr. Fucks.

You see here, he says,

I understand you run
Sugah's establishment.

How'd you like to see Sugah's in lights,

not hidden behind a vault door.

I could make you a very prosperous man.

Theaters, burlesques,
Vaudeville, cathouses.

All sorts of pleasures and amenities.

The big guy could be
eating the best meals,

drinking the finest wines.

You just gotta put him
in a position to do that.

I think you as mayor

could be a very good thing for Mentopolis.

You see he reaches in, pulls
out a checkbook and says,

have you considered forming
a campaign committee?

(pen clicks)

(Freddie laughing softly)

- [Danielle] Excuse me!

- And if so, please share
what your slogan would be

if you, Daniel Fucks,
were running for mayor.

(players laughing)

- I think the campaign
slogan would 100% be

let the good times roll.

- Mr. Avaricci, may I please
have a sidebar with my client?

- Yes, courtroom rules.
- You see he says,

anything you need to say can
be said here in our company.


You see that a woman walks
over in a cocktail dress.

She's got the full sort of hourglass,

sort of like Betty Boop hair,

and she comes over and
goes, hey there, sailor!

Nice to see ya!

- It's like every time you
think there wouldn't be

another one, there's a new
one and it's just as tasty!

- She says, ooh, meeting a
new person for the first time.

I hope you like me, 'cause
that'll keep me safe.

(Alex and Freddie laughing)

He says, please,

Ms. Fawnsworth.
(jazzy horn music)

- Ahh.

So I think that the
voice that Conrad hears

of realizing that us grabbing
this for the first time,

that we're doing the right
thing for the first time,

has like,

I feel like it has reverberated also,

not as sort of in the forefront,

but somewhere in the
back of Dan Fucks' mind

is this sort of feeling of, wait, hold on.

Doing the right thing
in a moralistic society

has its own rewards, too!

Like he sort of has this like,

It's not quite as good as being hugged,

but it's also... not bad!

The idea of, you know, there's morals,

and we have this plan.

Not quite sure what the plan is yet,

but we have this plan for
the papers that we picked up.

So I think for the first time,
he's like, wait a minute.


Maybe there are greater pleasures in life

than just the sort of
base first marshmallow,

so to speak, desires.

However, I think also
in his mind is the idea

of the feeling of, you know
what also, though, feels good.

Is getting one over on the bad guys, too.

So he says, oh, so you're willing

to make a campaign contribution, then.

- I'm very happy to see the
future of our fine city-

- I would like to see a lot of commerce.

I can see it now. We could
run the city together!

He kind of gives a wink over to A Tension.

- What's wrong with your eye?

- A light twitch. It's very dusty in here.

- It is very dusty.

- There's blood all over the
leather. This place sucks.

Should take a page out of
my interior decoration book.

- I think that the Don can see your...

- Duplicity?
- Can see your duplicity here.

So he says, come with me for
a moment, if you'd be so kind.

Fanny, take a look after Ms. Tension.

And you see Fanny says,
ooh! Hello there, sister.

You're looking so fine and
fresh. Who does your hair?

(laughs casually)

- It's two wigs sewn into one.

(players laughing)

- Double wigs for a triple good time.

(abruptly) You want to fuck?

(players laughing)

- Sure, but first, I have to know.

What's wrong with your eye?

- My eye? This one?
- Mm-hm.

- It's fake!

- (with grotesque intrigue) Oh.

(players laughing)

Oh, I love that.

- Is it really noticeable?
I didn't want that to-

- It was mostly the way it
was twitching. I was curious.

You know, I would be very interested

in going into a private
back room with you.

- Ooh la la. Want to
buy a girl dinner first?

- No.

(players laughing)

- (nervously) You're
not mad at me, are you?

Are you mad at me?

- I could tell you what would
make me less mad at you.

(quietly) Oh, gross.

(players laughing)

I could tell you what would
make me less mad at you.

Lead me to where you usually lead

all of your... special friends.

- Mm, all right.

Let's go and change into
something a little more fuckable.

(players laughing)

- How does she find the double entendre.

(players laughing)

Something mysteriously erotic about this.

(players laughing)

- So charged, all the conversations.

- She takes you by the
hand and begins to lead you

down a hallway towards another room,

opens the door to her room,

and you see there's a small
key on her bedside table.

She says, want me to
make you a stiff drink?

- Yes. I would love a room
temperature vodka, please.

(players laughing)

- Ooh la la!
(smooth jazz lounge music)

I like my drinks like I like
my women. Room temperature.

(players laughing)

- Oh no.
- She walks away.

You see that she kind of stops and thinks.

That can't be right!

(players laughing)

Walks out of there.

- You know, you promised

you would change into
something more comfortable.

I would love to do that for you.

- You want to change into something

more comfortable yourself?

- How about we start with me changing you

into something more comfortable.

- Ooh! Well, you know what I always say.

She walks her fingers
up your arm and says,

I'll change myself for absolutely anybody.

(players laughing lightly)

- (quietly) In for a fucking penny.

(players laughing)

Anastasia kind of runs
her hands across her cheek

and does the same spider
walk kind of at the-

What kind of shirt is she wearing?

- I think a halter top.
- A halter top?

(rising tone) A halter top

or like a (falling tone) halter top.

- Oh. (laughs)

The latter.

- Kind of walks her fingers down,

and then, (quietly) in for a penny!

And then, (laughs)

and then goes down to the
stomach, starts lifting up

the halter top, lifts it up,
lifts it up, lifts it up.

Can you move your arm?

I just need you to move your
arm. Just move your arm.

- I love a lady with a plan.

- Okay and then I, then I, I st-
(players laughing)

move it up, and it gets stuck right here.

(players laughing)

(Danielle grunts in effort)
- [Trapp] Ooh la la.

- Am I doing something you don't like?

(players laughing)

- Can you bend? Just stick it through-

Just put it in the hole.

- I want you to know that
I think you're great.

(players laughing lightly)

- Fantastic! And then finally,
just a little bit of a tug.

(final grunt of effort)

The shirt comes off.
- Ooh!

- And Anastasia...
- [Brennan] Sees the F.

- And traces her finger
around an F on her chest.

- Say, the family tattoo. You know it.

- I do. I do know it.

I happen to be great friends

with your brother and one of your sisters.

- Oh, you don't say?

Those old so-and-sos are
still snooping around town?

- They are.

You know, your sister really needs to get

her anger in check, but she's doing great,

and you would know that
your brother was the mayor

then abdicated the mayor throne,

and then we had to go to court and-

It's a whole big mess.

You'll read about it on the newspaper,

probably tomorrow or the day after.

But I see that you have
one of your family keys.

- I sure do.

- What would it take for you
to let me borrow that key?

- I'll do anything for you!

Absolutely anything! Have it right now!

- Fantastic. Thank you so much.

- And you're going to leave
this interaction liking me?

- Who could ever hate you?
- Oh!

Wow, you sure know how to
make a reflex feel special.

(players laughing lightly)

- Go ahead and take a seat, sugar.

- I'll do it, and I will keep doing it

until someone tells me to
do something different.

(players laughing)

- Take a seat for about 10 minutes, sugar,

and then get back to work.

- Ooh la la!

- [Danielle] Put your shirt on first.

- Okay!

(players laughing)

- And then Anastasia puts the key,

god, I guess in her titties.

(players laughing)

I don't imagine, I mean look,

if dresses don't have pockets now,

- You're sort of walking
out near the entrance,

preparing to put that key away,

and you bump into somebody.
(slapping sound)

There's a young woman who
bumps into you and goes, oh!

I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry.
(slick music)

Didn't mean to bump into
you. I'm just on my way out.

And turns to head out of here.

- Excuse me, miss? Excuse me, miss!

I believe that you may
have dropped something.

- Oh, did I? No, I don't think I did.

- No, I believe that you did.

- Oh.
- I think you may have

dropped something.

It looks like, I don't know, a key?

- You see that she looks
at you and says, oh.

I'm walking away with
one key more than I had.

And she holds your key up
(pleasant light sound)

in her hand and begins
to bolt down the hallway.

- Cool, I pull out my gun.

(group laughing)

(group laughing)

- Go ahead and give me a sharp check.

- Okay.

- [Brennan] DC eight.

- What have I become?
- [Brennan] What have I become?

- Oh no.

'Kay, that is a two.

- That's a two. That's all right.
(ball sliding on a track)

Bang! She is so fucking fast.
(fast paced music)

She actually has the key of
attention, your family key.

You still have Fanny's, and she has yours,

and she is sprinting away from you.

You fire. Bang, zing!

She whips around a corner.

You hear yells from
Avaricci's men as you fire.

What do you do in this moment?

- The first thing I do is
I turn to Avaricci's men.

Back off!

And then I take off my fedora,

a trilby appears in its place,

and I throw it behind me to
get her to slip and fall.

(players laughing)

- Okay.
- Boomerang around the corner.

- I'll say this, she's around the corner,

so you're going to have to pursue her

to get to the place where
you can throw the hat.

- Okay, then I'm going
to do that cool thing

that people do in movies that never works

where I run backwards with the gun.

And no one move, and no one follow me!

- You see they all go, hey,
hey, take it easy, all right?

Listen, nobody wants any trouble,

until you are around the corner,

in which case we will be pursuing you.
(players laughing)

- I will take that chance!

I keep kind of backing away until finally

I can turn around the
corner, and then I throw.

- Give me a sneak seven.

- I was so close to
being able to halve that.

- Slippery hats.
- Slippery hats.

Okay, come on baby, come
on baby, come on baby.

It's a five.

(ball sliding on a track)

- You rush around the corner and see

a big pair of these beautiful windows

in the manor house of Don Avaricci,

and you see that this woman,
(slow tense music)

who is wearing almost a servant's attire,

she's almost dressed like a waiter,

has your key,

has lept from a window,
(glass shattering)

and is scrambling up the sort of rainy,

shingled roofs,
(rain falling)

the slanted roofs of the manor here.

That's where she is.

If you want to get your key back,

you're going to have to pursue her.

- What. Is with. Us. And windows?

(players laughing)

Yeah, so I start pursuing her.

I look up to figure out,

because she went up to the roof, right?

- [Brennan] Yeah.

- So is there a fire
escape that I can go up

and then follow her-

- Ooh, if you don't want to...

You feel like her sneak
might be better than yours,

but you can give me a savvy or a snoop

to try to find a faster-

- Snoop!
- [Brennan] Let's do it.

Call it difficulty of...

We'll call it difficulty 10.

- Half!

(players laughing)

- Snap decision.

- Nerves of steel!

(players laughing)

- Bam! You just fucking
tear off. (panting)

As you're running, you're like,
I gotta beat her to there!

Because you can see that the
top of Avaricci's manor house

goes to a highway overpass,
one of the crumbled overpasses,

and there is a car with
the lights on up there

that she's running to, so
you run through the house

to get to the staircase before her.

We cut back to Dan with Avaricci.

You walk into a chamber with him,

and you see there are
a bunch of people here

who are printing and putting
up posters and stuff,

and you begin to see...
(swanky horn music)

the slogans are Fucks for Mayor.

(players laughing)

He says, now with your
friend in front of you,

I obviously think that

there would be a lot, you know,

you would want to save face, but here,

two urges can speak
honestly to one another.

So what I want to ask you, Mr. Fucks, is,

would you do me a favor of imagining

what this city would be like

with you in charge.

I don't want you to
make any promises to me,

but we got a lot of great guys working

here at the Avaricci household,
and they're really good

at coming up with what
our life could be like.

You see there are a couple people there,

scribes and little artists
and stuff like that.

You see there's one woman here

who looks like a sort of in-house artist.

She's got one of those little
green accountant visors on.

You see she looks up, sort of looks tired.

You see that there's a little plaque

on her desk that says E. Muse.

- I think for once we would be,

just sort of spitballing
here, sort of blue sky,

you know, we would be united in purpose.

We wouldn't be every which way,

motor functions going this way and that,

mental functions worried about schooling

and education and these
sort of larger ideas.

We wouldn't be distracted by those.

We would be united in a
single purpose, towards goals.

There would be unity.
It would be fantastic.

- Yeah, unity.

I want to know what
would feel good to you.

- Oh.

- And you see here he says,

I might be a man of some status,

but we're here in a private chamber,

just you, me, and these 20 paid workers.

(players laughing)

You see he steps closer

and sort of runs a finger
along your chin and says,

I want to know what would
make you feel good Mr. Fucks.

(Freddie breathlessly laughing)

- (primally) Yes.

(players laughing)

- Well, if I were to
pull into my compendium

of forbidden delights, the
stranger, the more esoteric.

- Give me the weird stuff, yeah.

- The big guy, you see, he
got this haircut recently,

and there was something
about, mm, the sound,

the feeling of the whispering shears

on the sort of back part.

- You see he points to someone and says,

put it up on the board.

We get a haircut once a week

from that old barber with a quiet voice.

- Really quiet, whispery one. Yes, yes.

- And a bristly mustache
that just touches-

- Very lightly!

- [Brennan] The outer edge of the ear.

- Yes, that one part right there.

- [Brennan] Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.

- Yes, yes yes yes yes yes.

- Mr. Fucks.

- Oh, that made me think of another one!

(players laughing)

- Yeah. I think you get going.

- You know when you're on one
side of the pillow, you see.

A pillow has four sides! Let me tell you.

If you think about it, just
want to make this clear,

this is sort of me
speaking here, not, yes.

There's four sides to a pillow,

because your head only kind
of takes the bottom half,

so actually if you flip it,

you're accessing another cold part.

But if you 180 it,
that's another cold part!

Then you can flip it
again, and by that point,

you can start the process anew!

There are, in fact, four cold-

- Mr. Fucks, you gotta dream big.

Hey fellas, fellas.
(Freddie laughing)

How much is one of those big iceboxes?

If we had a house, could we
get another in the basement

and leave the pillows in it

while we were busy about our day?

- Oh my goodness.
- [Brennan] Come home

to a couple ice cold pillows at night.

(players laughing)

- [Freddie] You're giving me ideas.

- Everyone's putting the weirdest shit

in their freezers in this town.

(players laughing)

- He looks at you and goes,

I don't know about you, Mr. Fucks,

but my balls are hard as diamonds.

(players laughing)

And he puts a warm hand on your back.

You see this man is powerful.

He could make these dreams come true.

The only thing that's stopping us,

now that M. Bition is out
of the way and Logic's gone,

the only thing that's
really stopping us...

is the kid.

- Yes, yes, the child.

- Do you like that child?
You a fan of that child?

- Absolutely not!

- Great.

Then we gotta do what we gotta do.

He turns around, and you
see he starts talking

to some of his friends and he says,

all right fellas, we know
the kid trusts Mr. Fucks.

We gotta find the kid,
put Fucks out in front,

and then someone's going to take the shot.

Conrad Schintz dies, tonight.

(tense music)

He turns to you and says,

with Schintz out of the way,

it's a long golden age
with Mayor Fucks in charge.

- I do like the sound of
that, to be totally honest.

Sounds great.

I'd like for you to
redo my picture, though.

It's a little bit, you know what I mean?

I want you to sort of
focus on the chest-al area,

the sort of thing I've got going on there.

I think this is a good selling point.

The people need to see it,
right? Get the artists on this.

- As he starts to move, I'm going to ask

if Daniel is telling the
truth in this moment,

or is trying to deceive, uh,

- Ooh, I think it's a
little bit conflicted,

because he's trying to keep
his options open, right?

Because he's thinking
about it in terms of, okay,

well, I'm in this situation.

I should see this as far as this goes.

But I think in the very,
very back of his head,

there's the thought of, you know,

maybe there's another way of doing this.

But I think in this moment right here,

he's kind of going
along more so with that.

- So you see that he says,

where do you think
Conrad Schintz is headed?

Where is he going to be?

- I have no idea what that
idiot child gets up to.

- You got no-
- Literally none.

I don't care at all.

I don't even think about that little shit.

- Well, he's a huge
impediment to all your plans,

so I would think about him.

(players laughing)

- Usually hanging out posting signs

on the outside of my club.

- All right, well, let's
go try to track him down.

You ride with me,

and when we find him,

all you gotta do is get him to step out

so that one of my guys on
the roof can take him out.

- Very well, very well.

- Incredible, you see Don takes you

and is going to make you fucking mayor,

and takes you to,

takes you out with him to his
car to go hunt down Conrad.

We're going to cut back
real quick to Anastasia.

You got that awesome snoop check.

You burst out onto the roof just in time

to see this woman coming
over the side of the thing.

Either give me...
(fast paced music)

What do you do as you see her
crawling over the banister.

- Okay, so she's crawling
over the banister,

and she is headed towards the car.

- Yeah, you get to the
top of the staircase,

open out into the rain.

You're at the little circular balcony

on a steepled tower of the manor house,

and she's climbing over
the edge of the banister.

You see her in a very
vulnerable position as you-

- Great, I throw my shoe at her.

Both shoes. They're heels.

- [Brennan] Great, go
ahead and give me sneak.

- (quietly) Okay.

- [Brennan] We'll call it difficulty,

she's in a very vulnerable
place, so difficulty six.

- Halve it.
- (laughs) Snap decision.

- Can't, not enough Moxie.
- Cool, okay.

- Okay.

10! Oh, 12.

- There you go. You throw the shoe. Bang!

Hits her hand, and she falls
and grabs the bottom of a thing

and is dangling in the
storm. (nervous panicking)

She goes, help! Help!

Get me out of here!

- Now shoeless, goddammit,

(players laughing)

I run over

and I take off my trench coat,

my trusty trench coat.

I'm now on kind of the area she's on.

I assu- there's something for
me, like a pipe or something.

- [Brennan] Yeah.

- So I tie part of my
trench coat onto the pipe.

- [Brennan] Yes.
- And then

hand her the other part,

and then I'm like, it's all on you, girl!

Because if I hold this, you're
going to let me fall with you

or you're going to do something tricksy,

so it is completely on you

if you would like to
climb up this trench coat.

- Great, and you see that she has your key

in her other hand as well.

You see she says, you're
really going to try to help me?

- Yes, I am trying to help you.

I've always been trying to help you.

- Give me snoop six.

- Is this a snap?

- [Brennan] Actually no, this is planned.

- Oh, I'm halving it.
- Okay. You look at her.

Her face. You recognize her face.

(tense music)

You recognize this
woman's face. It's so...

At first, you're sort of like, oh,

she's very plain looking
but also somewhat cute.

And then you're like,
no, her face is vague.

You look down at her.

Okay! She grabs it.

You begin to pull her up,
and she goes, all right!

Thank you for saving me!

As she comes up, you look down.

The rain, her white shirt,
her servant's shirt,

goes a little bit
translucent with the water,

and you see an F on her chest.

She pulls up with you.

(grunts in relief)

Oh god! Thank you so much for saving me.

Here's your key. It's
fine, I have one of my own.

(dramatic intriguing music)

- Is there any way that
I could borrow that key?

- Borrow it? No, no, I need it
to get the fuck out of here.

You see, again, that
F tattoo on her chest.

She says, but if you're
smart, you'll come with me.

We gotta get to the rail station

and get the hell out of dodge right now.

- The rail station?

- Yeah, we gotta get out of here!

- Okay, you know,

I think that we should
go to the rail station,

and it seems like you're
fast enough to get us there.

- I'm pretty fast. That's my car up there.

What's your name?

- My name is A. Tension.

- Fakename, Stacy Fakename.

(players laughing)

- Nice to meet you, Ms. Fakename.

(players laughing)

I was so close.

(players laughing)

- You see the real Stacy Fakename,

AKA Flight, gets you up onto the highway.

All right, you're going
to want to buckle up.

(mimics engine revving) and tears off.

And that's all for this episode
of Dimension 20: Mentopolis.

Tune in next week,

as we converge on Oblongata Station.

Come back for the thrilling finale

of Dimension 20: Mentopolis.

See you there!

(players applaud)

- It's all coming together.

- (echoing) There's our special guy.

Where are you going in such a hurry?

- Everybody just like, hold on one second.

I need to make an important phone call.

- This is a pretty urgent

situation, Fucks.
- Yes, yes, yes, yes,

but I have some things-
- Hold onto what?

- You hear the ka-chick of a door opening.

The big guy is walking out of his office.

- Okay.


- You're not elected government officials,

and I'm very much the station-

- Screw elected government
officials. I'm old money.

- This is my cake now! (slurps)

Fuck all of you!

- Mr. Fix?
- Yes'm?

- Duck!
(Brennan laughing)

- Fucks, you're willing to give
away everything to save me?

- No, absolutely not,

you dolt!
- Oh, okay. Sorry.

- I plan on getting all of that!

- Should his pressure meter
get all the way to 240,

he's going to faint and pass out.

(haunting jazz music)