Dimension 20 (2018-…): Season 15, Episode 7 - The Masquerade Ball - full transcript

The Lords of the Wing are revitalized. BINX helps Andhera. Everyone attends the ball.

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(dramatic music)

(whimsical music)

- To the churlish Captain K.P. Hob,

venerated soldier of the Goblin Court

to the master of ceremonies,
Delloso de la Rue,

pride of the Court of Wonder,

to BINX Choppley, sole
survivor of the Court of Craft,

to the tenebrous Prince Andhera,

scion of the Unseelie Court,

and to the notorious Lords of the Wing,

Lady Chirp Featherfowl,
Countess of Cluckingham

and Lord Squak Airavis,
Earl of Peckersberg,

Honored Archfey, we are
delighted to welcome you to

"A Court of Fey & Flowers."

Greetings and welcome to Dimension 20's

"A Court of Fey & Flowers."

I am your dungeon master, Aabria Iyengar.

Oh, there's handholding happening.

- On this side, not on that side.

- [Aabria] No, no?

- [Lou] They forced it.

Ours was natural.
(Emily laughing)

- It was organic over here

and that's important to note.
- Omar's hands are so warm.

It's amazing.
(Emily laughing)

- Thank you, thank you, thank you.

- All right, and with me
holding hands, feeling the love,

are my Pack of Pixies.
- We're still holding hands.

- Say hi, Pack of Pixies.

- [All] Hi, Pack of Pixies.

- So in our previous chapter,

rumors ran rampant as our Fey lords

traded missives and visits

following the events of the Hedge Maze.

In the nest of the Lords of the Wing,

Lord Airavis's admission
of his secret engagement

was chased by Lady
Featherfowl's revelation

of a secret family in the Mortal Realm.

- She had to outdo me.
(group laughing)

- Got him.

And speaking of the Mortal Realm,

BINX received a notification
and concerning words

from the real Gwyndolin Thistle-Hop,

that the portals between the
Fey Realm and Mortal Realm

were closing.

Eventually, Hob, Andhera, Rue and BINX met

to possibly fight to the death,

but instead conspire about
the Court of Wonder's role

and goals in making
plans and breaking plans

throughout the Bloom

and what deeper secrets
they might be hiding

from the Fey Realm and the Bloom

and from the players at this table.

But that's enough of a recap.

Let's do new shit!

And before we get started,

I would like to begin with the scene

that we were seeding at the
end of the last episode.

The Court of Sea Foam
is waiting for you, Rue,

at this like midnight sort
of blooming, jasmine garden

next to the seashore at the very edge.

You actually have to
leave the Tidal Island,

go back onto the beach
where the Hedge Maze was

and where the tea service was.

They're pulling you kind of far and away

to have a secretive word.

- Hmm.
- At your asking.

So is there anything you wanna
do before heading over there?

- Yes.

So the moment right before

was having the meeting with
these three other members

and I taken aside to BINX and I say,

"I'm on my way to the Sea Foam Court."

- [Surena] Why?

- I just have to clear these rumors

that have been going around

about the Court of Wonder stealing focus.

And I feel like I need information.

I know that you're looking to find magic.

- Mm-hmm?

- And I wanted to see if you
wanted to join me on this.

- Yes, yes.

- [Oscar] Now-
- Okay.

- [Oscar] I told them
that I was coming alone.

- Okay, uh, what if-

- But I can turn you into
something small and hideable.

- You can turn me something?

Okay, what would be on you?

Like, what would, can I be a frog?

I don't know.

Like what (Omar laughing) thing can I?

- You could be a frog
and just hang out here.

(Aabria laughing)

Can you turn me into a golden frog brooch?

- Oh!

- Can I do that?

- Are you talking about using polymorph?

- [Oscar] Yes.

- I will say you can absolutely
turn her into a golden frog,

but it will take a performance
check to hold still

and pretend to be a brooch.

(group laughing)

- Yes!

- Yes!
- This sounds good.

- Also she has bardic
inspiration that I gave her-

- Oh!
- Right before we got into the-

- Good to clock?
- Yeah, of course.

Yes, of course.

Ooh, what a statement piece.


And it matches this
golden, gold and green,

beautiful dress that I have.


- Great.

Should we, uh, are we going now or?

- Yes.

(magic casting)

(group laughing)

- I guess I just went
straight into a frog.

- You get turned into like
just a little baby, smooth,

golden-sheened frog.

And you are in a tailor shop

that also has a ventriloquist dummy.

- So many ventriloquist dummies.

- [Aabria] ] So there's other
stuff here. (Emily laughing)

- Oh, there's more?

- I'm sure you find like a little pin

that you could easily rip
the like fake jewel out of

and give yourself like a
little setting to sit in.

- [Surena] Mm-hmm.

- So it looks like you
are a formed, golden piece

on their outfit.

- Are you feeling quite comfortable?

- You're honestly quite cozy.

This is great.

- Well, thank you.

- Yeah.
- Let's away.

- What?

- Oh.

(group laughing)

- [Surena] Like we -

- Please, I'm sorry,

we must end this meeting a little early.

I have something to attend to.

- We've spent quite enough time here

and our absence will be noted, I agree.

The Court of Wonder
(frog croaking)

is, great point, and
(Aabria chuckling)

I'm going to say,

"BINX, it is an honor to find a like mind,

"and though you are a frog,

"so I'm kind of just getting
the top of your head-"

- And I'm just gonna reach
my little frog hand out.

- Enormous, furry, claw.

Shake little frog hand.

"Well met.

"Great alliances forged
in the dark of night

"are the bread and butter
of the Goblin Court."

- My heart is beating so fast
'cause his hand is so close

(Brennan laughing)
to my bosom.

- Can I say the cloud is throbbing

(group laughing)
as I'm still

picking up on your thoughts?

- Disgusting.
- Yeah.

- There is much yet to learn.

- [Surena] Yes.

- My next move will be to challenge

the Prince Apollo to a duel,

but there are cleverer of us
in this conspiracy than myself.

I shall wait to make any move

until those of us assembled
here can learn more.

And I want to reach

to my red sash under my coat.

And I pull something off. And
I just look at you and say,

"Is there anything that you'd
like to say to Miss Choppley?"

- You make an excellent frog.

- I turn to talk to Rue
(Surena laughing)

in this like moment of
conversation here to have a moment.

And I just look and go,

"I know you are going to
dispel certain rumors.

"I owe you an apology
(soft music)

"for I know that these are not
the only rumors circulating

"about the Court of Wonder,
nor indeed yourself.

"For the part I played in
suggesting something untoward

"that I know, in truth,
you took no part in

"I can offer only-"

- Speak plainly.

- After the duel, when
I announced publicly,

when I suggested between
the lines of what I said

that you had proposed to
the Viscountess Grabalba

and the rumor then began to
spread from the Goblin Court

that Apollo had canceled the engagement

that you might propose,

this was a shameless effort to save face.

- You started that rumor?

- The beginning of it, not the following.

- Why?

- Wuvvy would not say
why I was challenged,

and to this day, I do not know why I was.

In the absence of an explanation,

I offered something that I thought would

elevate the station of my court
in my moment of humiliation.

- I need to tell you this.

- I climb off of you.
(Aabria laughing)

Climb on to-

- Do you want to go see the outside?

- I would love to see the outside.

- Great, we'll be right back.

- I'll give you privacy.

(Aabria laughing)

- Yeah.
- Ah.

- Good, Captain Knickolas P. Hob.

- Hearing my first name,

my ears sort of flip back onto my head.

- I warn you the dangerous
nature of rumors.

This is why rumors are toxic.

They form out of suspicion.

And that's why this attack
to Apollo, it worries me.

It frightens me because

it's not really based on anything, is it?

- We must learn.

I understand that there is
precious little information.

I am waiting for the Prince
Andhera and Ms. Choppley

to find out what they can.

But in a fog of mystery,

the question of Goblin honor is at stake

and we cannot suffer this insult.

Some would-
- But what about you?

What about your honor?

You were used, Hob.

Know that.

Your personal victory in a big battle

is the impetus of this
marriage formed out of what,

(Oscar laughing)


You were the instrument in
which all of this chaos started.

What did you get out of it?

And now you carry out
other people's failures.

For what?


I implore you to start
taking care of yourself

and your feelings

because no one in that court
seems like they're doing that.

You are so attentive to
other people's feelings.

What about your own?

(soft music)

- I,

(Brennan sniffling)

I can raise neither objection nor reproach

to the words you have spoken here.

I had planned more to say,

to speak to the nature of your
character and of your bravery

that you have exhibited in this Bloom,

but I now know that my
stature is of a nature

that those compliments would be unworthy.

You deserve this more than I.

And the medal I took off my
sash, I place into your hand.

It is a medal of courage.

And I think, holding back tears,

I turn and walk out the door.

(soft music)

- I'm not going to stop him,

but I will say, as he's
walking out the door,


"take care of yourself.

"Don't act impulsively
(Emily laughing)

"and think about why

"you are doing the
things that you're doing.

"Why bring out things

"that have been left dead
and buried for so long?

"You might uncover things you don't want.

"What is this actually for?

"Pray, protect yourself."

- I rush into the storm.

- Yeah.

- I take a moment, collect myself.

I look out.

- Oh yeah, so when I was

(group laughing)

in the Mortal Realm,

we would just hide a lot of socks.

- Oh, so that's where they go.

(Brennan laughing)
- That's where they go.

Have you been to the
Mortal Realm? It's great.

- I have read about it in books.

- Do you read a lot of books?

- I hate to brag.

- But you're gonna,

because that's what the
next sentence is, right?

(Omar laughing)

- I've read so many fucking books.

It's like my trademark.

- Can I make an insight
check on these two?

- Please do.

- There's a connection.

Oh fuck.

(group laughing)

- Unclear.

- 12.

- I'm not gonna make you
guys roll against it.

This is a like nice moment,

but I do think it's worth saying

you just had a whole big thing

and suddenly like turning
your focus outward

is not as effective.

Also, Polymorph only lasts an hour.

- [Oscar] Oh, shoot.
- And you've got to hustle.

- I'm afraid to interrupt this,

(Brennan laughing)
but we have to go.

- Well, we'll continue this later.

I have so much to tell you.

Probably better that I'm different.

- As

you were.


(Omar stuttering)

- Bye!

(group laughing)

And then I hurry my way to the Sea Foam.

(dramatic string music)
- You exit out into the night,

tiny frog friend on your chest

and make your way down through the city

and out across like the tidal lane

to get to the beach on the other side.

I do need you to make a stealth
check, though, as you go.

(Oscar laughing)

- Ooh, that's a two.
(Oscar laughing)

- Amazing.

Your head is down and
you're moving quickly.

And there are people, lesser Fey mostly,

in this part of the city
that are sort of moving by.

And as you make your way

and try to be as discreet
as you can in this moment,

you don't notice the
like curly, white hair

that flashes by you as you move.

But she noticed.

And you make your way
to the Sea Foam Court's

little, jasmine garden,

and you see sort of
standing and waiting for you

the Wave Master, Lady
Efendra, Baroness Alven

and Sorwen, who is sort
of known as the Sea Wall,

the Champion of the Sea Foam Court,

and Wannessa, the human,

looking a little sleepy and out of sorts

and is kind of just lazing in the grass,

and gives you a little wave
hello as you come to meet them.

- I do a deep bow to-

- [Aabria] It is returned.

- All members of the Sea Foam Court.

And I say, "Thank you, Wave Master,

"and the rest of the Sea Foam Court,

"including our dear Wannessa,

"for having me and listening
to what I have to say."

- The Wave Master obviously
sort of takes point on this

and you see that Baroness Alven

is actually like taking notes.

- [Oscar] Hmm.

- For whatever that's worth

and whatever you wanna do with that.

Of course, we are grateful
for your work thus far

and would love to discuss

whatever it is you would like to discuss.

- I'd like to know how you are
enjoying the Bloom as of now.

And if you have any notes on what I can do

to improve the standing of
the Bloom to your liking,

I would greatly appreciate it.

- Hmm.

Give me an insight check.

- Ooh.

(Oscar humming)

That's a 12.

- The Wave Master's face
is fairly inscrutable

because it is only vaguely humanoid.

This is wave made flesh and form,

and you can tell more from body language

than from like any inscrutability
around where their eyes

or a puckering of a mouth would be,

but there is a coldness and stillness

before they speak again.

Everything has been exemplary.

You are a credit to your court.

(Oscar coughing)

- Thank you for the kind words.

I do want to bring something up

in terms of the Court of Craft.

As you know,

they've made their debut in
a magnificent, I would say,

display of performanceship.

And I would like to
know how you feel about

the Court of Craft attending the Bloom.

- Hmm.

If I'm being incredibly honest,

it is a surprise

that she is here,

but we would never be so rude

as to deny hospitality

to the leader of a court,

diminished though it may be.

- Is the court fully diminished

if there's one person present

or is it waning?

I have heard stories
that the Court of Craft

is in need of magic.

- And at this, you hear Alven
kind of (Aabria coughing).

- What's that?

- Hmm?

Oh, well, I mean,

are we just gonna not
talk about the fact that

yours is the foil to the Court of Craft?

If their magic is gone,

we all have our guesses
about who's responsible.

- And who is that?

- The Court of Wonder.

Oh, I'm sorry, are we not,

(Emily laughing)

we could just have this conversation.

- No, I just wanted you
to say Court of Wonder if-

- Yes, your court.

So shouldn't we be asking
you how you feel about

a loose end appearing?

(whimsical music)

(Oscar sighing)

- I,

I'm here as the Master of Ceremony,

not as a member of the Court of Wonder.

I will not

speak for the court.
- You are a member.

If not you, then who?

- Literally anyone else.

- Okay.

- You know that I'm barely
at the Court of Wonder.

I have been busy preparing
this entire Bloom.

- We understand that.

And we like you.

That's why we are happy,

willing to have this
conversation with you.

But when it comes down to it,

isn't that the whole
thing we're doing here?

We, 100 generations ago,

decided to form courts and alliances

to bolster ourselves and
make ourselves stronger

and more secure,

and we have held to those
lines for millennia.

So you can say with your full chest

and your glorious, true self,

who you are,

but you are still the premier
member of the Court of Wonder,

and every word you say
rings with their authority.

And you are a fool to think

that anyone doesn't understand that

when interacting with you.

So if we are being
gracious, if a little curt,

know that it is because the Sea Foam Court

does not want to incur the
wrath of the Court of Wonder.

- Understood.

I appreciate the honesty intended

in which you've told me this.

- I'm gonna need a performance
check from this little frog.

(group laughing)

- Oh my God, oh my God.

- You have Bardic inspiration.

- Oh, oh, oh God.

- Stop reminding her.

(group laughing)
- Okay, that was cocked.

- I want this frog.
- [Omar] You also have

lucky feet!
- 20, 20!

(hands clapping)

- Nat 20.

- [Aabria] Natural 20?
- Natural 20.

- Amazing.

- Thank you, Bardic inspiration.

(group laughing)

- You tremble a little bit as
your court is being discussed,

but you hold it together.

And, clearly, the eyes of everyone here

are locked in this like strange
moment with you specifically

as they state quite
boldly and quite baldly

that it is the fear of your court

that keeps their tongues
from being even sharper.

- Hmm.

Like I said, I cannot speak
for the Court of Wonder,

but since you've been such
gracious hosts in the Bloom,

I would love any input as
to how the Court of Wonder

can at least contribute to
the quelling of this rumor

that I know that you are very well,

know that you fucking know, okay?

(group laughing)

- And you actually see as
you drop a little F bomb,

they actually all kind
of relax a little bit.

Like, "Oh, we've said the thing."

And you even see that the
jasmine in and around the garden

opens up a little bit more

and releases its scent into the air

as this like tension
goes out of the meeting.

(Aabria sighing)


we are deeply grateful
to the magic lent to us

through your efforts and from your court.

We understand that this would
not be as glorious as it is

without you.

My fear, and my fear for my court,

is where your ambitions lie next.

- My personal ones or
the one of the Court?

- The one of the Court of Wonder.

Do you plan on, maybe it's
better if it's not said.

- No, please.

- When things are spoken,

it brings them closer to being.

(whimsical music)

We have bolstered our alliances
with the Court of Stone.

We believe that if advances are
made by the Court of Wonder,

we will be able to hold out long enough

for reinforcements to arrive.

- I understand what you mean by that.

(Oscar sighing)

- I don't know if there's any
assurances you could make,

but that is our fear,

not about the execution
of a series of parties,

lovely though they are, sorry.

Not to denigrate your work.
- No, no, no.

No offense taken.

Having this meeting with all of you

has made me very well aware

that I must have my own meeting
with the Court of Wonder.

(frog groaning)

(Oscar coughing)

(group laughing)

I'm sorry.

Had a very full dinner
and (Oscar coughing).

- Deception check.
(Oscar laughing)

- Oh, oh, oh.

- That is a 16.
- 17.

- A two, and you got a 16?

(Aabria laughing)

- No, this is a seven and
I have a plus 10 deception.

- Oh no, him.

- Oh, wait, deception, sorry.

Two, eight.
- You have six.

- Ooh!
- Ah, yikes!

- I was about to be like,
"A two to a 16, goddamn!"

(group laughing)

- Is this 3.5?

(group laughing)

- Just inspiration, something?

(group laughing)

I treasure you.

- Yes.

Hey, I got you.

(group laughing)

We ain't gonna let this bullshit fly.

(group laughing)
(hands clapping)

- I was at performance.
(group laughing)

It was an honest mistake.

- I bet you were.

I bet you were.
(group laughing)

- What you see, then, as
you're kind of laughing

and taking this off

is that the Court of Sea Foam's
main members are more like,

they're busy exchanging
glances between one another,

but it's Wannessa-

- [Lou] Oh no.

- Whose eyes flare with like,

right at the center of her pupils,

a little, purple glow,
like a red eye effect

as her Detect Magic

is focused on you.
- Oh, she has detect magic.

That's cool.
- Wannessa, yes.

- And is doing a much
worse job than both of you

at being like, "Yeah, fly casual."

- So casual right now.

- Yeah.

A matched energy, for sure.

(group laughing) But she's
not gonna say anything,

but she absolutely notices.

(Oscar coughing)

- So, with that,

and if there's nothing
else to be discussed,

I would take my leave
if it pleases the court.

- It was planned as
maybe a bit of a slight,

but given this conversation,

we think it is in everyone's best interest

to mention that a small
change has been made

to the ball.

- Oh?

- The invitations that were sent out

outlined that it is,
in fact, a masquerade,

with maybe some intonations that

glamors and the revelation of true selves

was a important theme across this Bloom.

Beg your pardon for taking
a jab at your moment.

- I take no offense to that.

(ominous music)

Thank you for being honest.

- And for whatever it's worth,

The Sea Foam Court has
many types of beings

in a myriad of shapes and sizes,

and we have never cared
about the outward look.

It has always been your
sharp mind and keen eye

that has garnered our
still-continuing respect,

but we were feeling kind of cunty

with the Court of Wonder stuff,

and that's just what that was.

And I'm so sorry.

- No, I mean, no offense.

I mean, I get it, but like,

(group laughing)

honestly, like I feel, real talk?

- Yeah.
- Like I feel-

- Yeah.

- And thank you, honestly.

You do me great honor for having me here

and speaking so plainly.

Thank you to everyone
in the Sea Foam Court,

and thank you, Wannessa.

- She's just, (Oscar laughing)



You're so welcome.

(Aabria sighing)

Tell Gwyndolin I said hi.

- Yes, I will.

(Oscar coughing)

I will, yes.

Well, there is much to do and, well,

we have a ball-

- We have a ball.
- To do, so I must away.

- You are escorted out,

not by the Wave Master, who
has gone into conference with

the Lady and Baroness,
but it's actually Sorwen,

the Sea Wall, the sort of
champion of the Sea Foam Court

who walks you out and will
escort you back through the lane

up to like the main island.

And as he's walking, will just say,

"People move courts all the time.

(dramatic string music)

"That's all."

(Oscar sighing)

- It's frustrating.

You understand?

The things that I do is based on my merits

and to be associated with a court

that you have very little to
do with is very frustrating.

You must understand this.

I mean no disrespect,

but I do understand that
just by my presence,

I speak for a court that has
very little to do with me.

- I understand.

- Make a performance check as
he kind of just sizes you up.

Damn, that was a natural one.
- And you have a plus 16.

(group laughing)

- It's a seven, uh, 18.

- He studies you intently.


Well, I began at the Court of Stone

and I followed my heart here.

And it's worked out ever since,

for whatever that's worth.

(dramatic string music)

Have a good night.

- I give him a kind look.

And with just that,

the amount of gratitude
that pours out is infinite.

- You see as he kind of
turns and walks back,

he's moving a little quicker

and someone who has absolutely
been like a backdrop,

background actor,

he's moving, he's quite
pleased with himself.

He thinks he's had a
big, impressive moment

after saying like three words total.

(Oscar laughing)

And we move from there

and we move toward our Lords of the Wing.

- Oh.

- Ugh.

(group laughing)
- What a reaction.

(Omar laughing)

- So we just got an
invitation from Prince Apollo?

- [Aabria] Yes.

- And what does it look like?

- [Aabria] It's literally-

- And who was it delivered by?

(group laughing)

- Nice!

- I will take the moment to memorize

Prince Apollo's handwriting.

- Okay.
(group laughing)

- Smart.

This is a handwritten note
in like gold embossing ink

on like a burnished, gold, thin plate

inside a gold envelope.

He's got a theme; it's a lot.

Delivered by a gold automaton.

- Oh, delightful.

- There is no hiding
this is from him for you,

and an invitation to just
like a private salon,

like a little, chill hangout

with just a couple close friends.

- Um, Cousin, how far away is it?

Do we have three hours and 22 minutes?

(Aabria laughing)

- Cousin, if I had to guess,

if I really thought on it,

took all of the information I had and-

- Perhaps we should go
to the Fey calendar?

- Oh yes, of course.

(group laughing)

(Lou grunting)

(Lou humming)
(group laughing)

(group laughing)

(Lou grunting)

Definitely not.

- What?

We don't have three hours and 22 minutes?

- Well, I guess how much time do we have?

(group laughing)

- Everything's a little
wibbly-wobbly time-wise here.

So this is a little
earlier in the evening.

- [Lou] Okay.

- And the invitation just sort of,

"We're gonna be hanging out all night,

"drinking and chilling."

- In that case, maybe we do
have three hours and 25 minutes.

(Emily laughing)

- 22!

- 22!

Cousin, what are you up to?

- Well, because after Andhera offered a-

- The beard thing?

- The beard thing!

- To give you his beard or whatever.

- And I was like, okay,

clearly you have someone else.

- [Lou] Yes.

- I'm not standing in the way of that.

- Yes, of course.

- But it is true that
Grandfather's coming.

- [Lou] He is.
- I need a match.

- [Lou] Yes.

- I need to put out feelers-
- [Lou] Yes.

- To figure out who else might be,

I mean, many of us Archfey
have things on the side.

(Lou laughing)

(group laughing)

- [Lou] You know who
you're talking to, yes.

- And someone else who is
in a very similar position.

- Yes.

- So I just need to do all the espionage

I haven't been able to do yet.

- Oh, everything's good.

Like, we go to this, I mean,
this perfect event, the salon,

and we find you-

- [Emily] Yes.

- A match.

- We find me a match

that is similarly emotionally unavailable.

- Exactly.

And is that not its own kind of love

in like kind of a different way?

- Oh, yes.

Oh, there will be friendship.

There will be mutual respect.

- [Lou] There will be friendship.

- And who knows,

when my partner on the
Material Plane passes

because her lifetime is-

- What like two, 300, 400, 500 years?


- Oh, Cousin.
- 700, 800 years?

(group laughing)

Am I going?

I'll keep going.

(group laughing)

One K, 1.5,

(group laughing)

two K,

three K.

Four K?

- Cousin, she's looking
at 80 to 100 years,

and that's assuming-

- But a comma
(group laughing)

in the life of the Archfey.

- Yes, yes, yes.
(group laughing)

And currently, she's 42, so.

(Lou gagging)
(group laughing)

- I need Gobble!

(group laughing)

- Yes!

- Andhera gave us a gift on
the first day when we arrived.

- Oh!

- I told you to hide it

and then had my cousin Gift of Gab myself

so I couldn't remember where it was.

(group laughing) I need
you to find it now.


- What's the code word?

You told me.

- Well, it's probably
the one I always use,

which is Airry Pearry.

(group laughing)

Which, of course-

- Speaking of which,

we need to bring a copy to Prince Apollo.

(group laughing)

- Oh, I mean, he would make
a perfect Green Hunter.

(Brennan laughing)

- Right.

- [Lou] He'd be perfect.

- Right, okay.

- He's got all the smolder.

- I just need a little time to just set up

so I can be seeing all
and hearing all, so-

- I'm gonna get drunk

and maybe do some weird
drugs, if that's alright.

- Oh, I love that.

I will join you in the drugs

as soon as I am done with concentrating-

- Okay.

- On my wizardly abilities.

So I'm creating a Glyph of
Warding at a fourth level

to create Arcane Eye, which
all of my spells are bird puns.

It hasn't come up, but it's Arcane Ibis.

(group laughing)
(hands clapping)

- [Oscar] Okay.
- [Lou] Oh.

- So, I create a little glyph of an Ibis

and then I also create a little glyph

of my Flock of Familiars.

And so right before we leave,
I'll trigger both of those

so that I'll have a flock of familiars

and then an invisible Ibis.

- Love it.
- [Lou] Great.

- So that I can survey all of all.

And the Flock of Familiars,

it's a picture of an African Gray,

because they have the
greatest vocabulary, so-

- [Aabria] Nice.

- It's, yeah.

And I think that's all.

And then I'll take a short rest
to get my spell slots back.

- Love it.

Why don't you take the short rest?

- What is the effect of the drugs

that were given to us on that first day?

- Yes.

So, yeah, Gobble returns with
two red gems that are drugs.


Did you have plans for this?

I have something written, but I don't.

I want to defer to you.

- [Lou] Oh, it's recently written.

- Who showed up with drugs.

The right of first refusal goes to you.

- No, let's go with what you've written.

- Okay.

So you take it as you're getting
ready for your long rest.

- [Lou] Yes.

I'm gonna need a constitution
saving throw from both of you.

- Okay.

- Yeah, let's get fucked up.

- Can I?

No, nevermind.
- [Lou] Oh no, of course.

Hey, Cousin, go, go, go, go, go.

(group laughing)

- Okay, I rolled a nat one.

(group laughing)

- I rolled a 15.

- Ah.

- Okay.

- You've given me inspiration,
like five different times.

- [Aabria] 100%.
- I've never used it.

- [Aabria] Yeah.

- Actually, I wanna fail.
(group laughing)

- You sure?

- Yeah.

- [Aabria] Okay.

So you made the save.

- Yes.

(whimsical music)
The Arcane Veil

sort of turns to mist around you,

a snortable mist.

- Ooh.

- A beautiful moment.

- [Emily] Mist.
(Lou inhaling)

- And in this,

not only are your
inhibitions sort of loosened,

they are loosened because
the understanding of magic

and its distance from you

is lost.

- [Lou] Mm.

- And for the next,

roll a D4 for me.

- Ooh.

- Ooh.

- Oh.

- It's a four.

Or what is that?

- No, that's a one.

(group laughing)
- I think it might be a four.

(group laughing)

- These snitches.

- [Lou] No.

- It could have been a
four; I'll never know.

I cannot see.

- It's a one.

- For the next one hour-

- [Lou] Mm-hmm?

- Any magic you cast will
not burn a spell slot.

- Oh?

- Wow!

- Okay.
(Lou laughing)

- Drugs are great.
(group laughing)

You guys should be doing drugs out here.

- You wanna revisit that conversation

about not using my Goddamn inspiration?

- [Emily] I'm gonna use-
- Yeah, maybe.

- Okay.

Can I also bonus action Blade Song

so that I get an increase to
my concentration saving throw?

Oh, that's concentration,
nevermind, not constitution.

Okay, 14.

- 14 beats the threshold.

- [Emily] Okay.
- [Lou] Great.

- And in the same way
you feel yourself loosen

and move into the space,

and both of you, as arcane casters-

- Three hours.

- [Lou] Yes.

- Three hours, both of
you as arcane casters,

feel incredible.

- Cousin, what have we been doing?

(group laughing)
- [Lou] I tell you.

- Now that we're in this
loosened state, can I just say-

- Please, talk.

- The wager.

I reached out to Rue, remember?

- [Lou] Yes.

- With all those little salt Goblins?

- Yes, the Olive Branch, then the-

- And I sent out the letter?

- [Lou] Yes, Mm-hmm.

- Never heard back from them.
- Never.

- It's a dead end.
- It's a dead end.

- I think we should just try
to short the wager on us.

- Yeah, we've gotta win somehow!

- [Emily] You know?

So we just bet against ourself,

and then when we fail, we make money.

- I bet.

You know-
- [Emily] Yeah?

- You know Apollo.

- Yeah?

- He's been looking at this.

- Yes, he's been looking at it.

(Emily laughing)

- I bet he would help.

I bet he would help.

- [Emily] Okay.

- And then I'd be like, "Apollo, help us?"

- Help us, Apollo.

- And he'll be like, "Of course."

- [Emily] Oh!
- My pleasure.

(Emily laughing)
(whimsical music)

- Okay, yeah.

Great, so everything's all settled.

- Everything is perfect.

- Everything's perfect.

We're just gonna say fuck this wager.

- Fuck the wager, man.

(group laughing)

- And just fucking Bloom it up.

- Just like old times.

You know, they say this
might be the last Bloom.

- [Emily] Yeah.

- And if it's the last Bloom-

- We gotta Bloom like it's 1999.

- [Lou] We gotta Bloom,

which again, you gotta tell me about that.

That sounds like a crazy year.

(group laughing)

- Yeah, you weren't there
because you had pneumonia.

- Yes.
(group laughing)

- [Emily] Remember?
- Yes.

- I remember.

Oh God, 1999 Bloom was great.

- I think we're gonna take off.

- [Aabria] Yeah.

- But we're still walking
on our way to Apollo.

- Yeah.

So I will also summon my ostrich.

- Oh, good.
(group laughing)

- So let me just add this before
you like get back into it.

So you're not burning spell slots,

but you do have to make new con saves-

- [Lou] Okay.

- In order to like maintain your vibe.

So go ahead and just
gimme another con save.

- Oh, we're con saving
to maintain the vibe.

And you still have that Bardic.

- [Emily] Oh, right.

- Oh, another 15.

- [Aabria] You're fine.
- The high continues.

- [Emily] A 12 for me.

- [Aabria] You're fine.

- Yes!


Oh yeah, and before we leave,

I just paw at the Ibis,

paw at the African Grays.

And now both of these are summoned

without me having to
worry about concentration.

- [Aabria] Love it.

Love it.

- And I think as we walk

and are in this kind of reflective space,

I think Squak is gonna
like look at his cousin.

So I'm an uncle?

Oh, amazing.

- [Emily] Yeah, do you wanna see it?

I actually have been keeping it on me.

- Ah!

- She made this.

I know, I know,

everyone's child's arts and crafts-

- [Lou] It's so kitschy.

- Are like so annoying to pretend,

but I really do feel like it's good.

- Oh, does she have a favorite drug yet?

(group laughing)

What is she drinking?

Wine, gin?
- So, that's the thing

about mortals.

They're like very sensitive to stimulants.

- [Lou] Uh huh.

- So they just have to avoid them.

- So your child's not

drinking gin yet?
- [Emily] Especially when

they're young.

Well, no.

- Well, then for what you're saying,

my child drinking gin early-

- [Emily] She's four years old.

- Okay, and for them, is that?

- [Emily] Yeah, so for them-

(Emily laughing)
- How big is she?

Is it a she?

- [Emily] It's a she, yeah.

- Is she like that?

- No, no, no.

She's comes up to my
hip or maybe my thigh.

- [Lou] Oh, okay.

- Yeah.

- Uh, Chirp, by the way,

can I get an Arcana check

when you held the little like woven piece.

- Um,


- You pick it up

and as you're holding it,

you feel a strong resonance of magic.

(piano music)
It feels,

if we go back millennia,

to when you were and felt young,

and moving through the House
of the Lords of the Wing

at their full power,

that energy that is so
connected to air and flight

and life and soaring,

that feeling you don't
feel at home anymore,

you feel a little surge of it
inside of this woven piece,

but it does feel different.

It comes with that sort of stomach flutter

of flying, but knowing
that maybe you'll fall,

something impermanent,

something to her mortality
that has changed the magic.

But you recognize it as
very much your magic.

(soft piano music)
- Yeah.

Mortals kind of like add their own thing.

- [Lou] Mm-hmm.

- You know, it's like,

because their lives are so precarious-

- [Lou] Mm-hmm.

- The things they do mean so much more.

- [Lou] Mm.

- And that's how I feel about her.

- [Lou] Ooh.

- And she's also very sticky.

Children are so sticky.

- What?

- Yes!

- Like an adhesive?

- No, like a jam.

- Like a glue?

The children, is it their skin?

- No.

It's just when you touch them,

their hands are always
just a little bit sticky.

- Oh.

I'll have to meet this-

- Her name is Phillipa,
but you can call her Peep.

That's what everyone calls her.

- Peep.

Peep my niece.

(Emily laughing)

Well, I'll tell you,

when I meet her, I'm
bringing a shit ton of gin

and me and her are getting
fucked up together.

- I love the impulse to give her presents.

- [Lou] Yes!
(Omar laughing)

- Just not drugs or alcohol, yet.

(Lou laughing)
- Well, she better be fun.

Like you.
(group laughing)

- Oh, she's very fun.

She's very fun.

- And with this partner, Esme?

- [Emily] Mm-hmm.

- How is it?

You know, it?

- The sex?

- Yes.
(group laughing)

What, the love?

- [Emily] It's fantastic. It's fantastic.
- I don't give a shit about the love.

- Oh, is it that whole
mortal thing of like,

well, I can only fuck for
like 80 years, so it's like-

- Yes, yes!
(group laughing)

- [Lou] So it's like-
- It's just like-

- [Lou] Like giving it all, all the time.
- [Emily] You know I get off

- on other people's pleasure.

- [Lou] Yes! - And her pleasure's
so heightened by how short

a life she has.

- Oh God, I can't imagine only having

80 years worth of orgasms.

(group laughing)

- She's packing 'em in!

- And she's packing!

- [Emily] She's packing 'em in!

- That's my cousin!

- Yes, yes!

(group laughing)

- And I think we're gonna
head off to Apollo's.

- Sweet.

And yeah, you arrive.
(soft string music)

You make your way up to like
the main thrust of the palace

to the wing and tower

that is dedicated to the Court of Wonders.

You're a couple floors below Rue,

and above them, still,

the members of the courts that are here.

But you actually see, as you
walk into this small parlor

that is a little thick
with magical cigar smoke

and heavy with a scent
of incense and drinking

and cologne

and just people in close
proximity in this little parlor,

you actually see two members of the courts

are like sitting in the corner.

- [Lou] Mm-hmm.

- Masks on, but still
somehow like interacting

with small snifters of brandy,

with little fish swimming in them.

You see Apollo, who is
sitting in the corner

and happily hails you, but
doesn't get up to go speak.

- Oh.


- Interesting.
- [Lou] I love it.

- Yarl Korguf, who is the
leader of the Court of Stone,

and two of his attendants,

who you would probably
have picked up via osmosis,

are Ruyin and Claete.

You see Suntar, the Princess
of the Unseelie Court.

- [Lou] Oh.

- And Wuvvy.

- Oh, Wuvvy in the building!
- [Emily] Wuvvy!

- [Aabria] Mm-hmm.

- Great.

Who's the lowest ranking
person in the room?

- Wuvvy.

- Okay, I'm not gonna fuck with Wuvvy.

- Okay.
(group laughing)

- Then it would be
either the two attendants

to the Yarl of the Court of Stone.

- And are they also lords,
or what's their ranking?

- No, they're just sort
of like attendants.

They're just part of the retinue.

- Great, I'm gonna Polymorph
one of them into a fish.

(group laughing)

- [Aabria] Shut up!

- And go, "The Lords
of the Wing are here!"

(group laughing)

- [Aabria] Amazing.

- DC's 18.

(Emily laughing)

If he wants to fight
being turned into a fish.

- What kind of fish does Ruyin turn into?

- Oh, just a little mud skipper.

(group laughing)
- Oh God!

- And then I chase him around.

I just grab a bust.

I just start throwing
shit at the mud skipper.

(group laughing)



- This little fish is flopping around.

(Emily laughing)

Does take like at least
two objects to the dome-

- [Lou] Yes.

- 'Cause he didn't roll
that high, but he's okay.

Isn't gonna get Polymorphed.

There's like a half of a hit point there.

- [Lou] Great.
- But we're gonna leave this.

- I pop it back up and
I go, "Yarl, my bad."

(group laughing)

- The Yarl is like
guffawing and bent over.

Everyone saw this energy
and is immediately like,

"Oh my God, they're back.

"We thought you were all bummers forever."

- [Lou] Oh!
- It's been a bummer.

- Yes.
(Emily laughing)

I'm gonna cast Shatter
on two of the windows.

(glass shattering)
(group laughing)

And then I'm going to jump into one,

cast Major Image for a shit ton of birds

to fly through one into the other.

(group laughing)

No, motherfuckers!

(group laughing)
(group applauding)

- And I'll take out my Shadow Blade

and just like chop everyone's
cigars from their mouth

(group laughing)

like where they left off.

- [Lou] Yes.

- You gotta give me an attack roll.

That's so good.

- Nat 20!
(group shouting)

- Yes!
- Yes!

(group applauding)
(group laughing)

All their cigars in my wing.

(group laughing)

There's like three
African Grays on my hand.

- [Lou] Yes, of course.

- Ah!

- Ugh!

And at this point now,

I'm wondering if Apollo
is still sitting down.

(group laughing)

- Apollo is standing and screaming.

- That's about right.

That's about right.

- [Aabria] Oh my God.

- That was a show, my God.

- Welcome!

You are well worth the wait.

- Ho, ho, ho.

- And I don't mean just tonight.

I mean, this entire Bloom has been

a misery

without your true selves.

- I would agree.

There's barely been any matches,

so little amorous endeavors.

- Right?

And one duel!

- One duel!

- And it didn't even end in a death!

- No one died!

- Who knew Pillar Boy was hung?

- I know!
(group laughing)

- I did like that revelation.

- [Lou] Wild, right?

- Suntar is like
disappearing in the shadow,

like, "Please don't talk to me."

- Suntar!

No, no, no, no.
(group laughing)

- [Aabria] We're not talking.
- Suntar, no, no, no.

- Take your cigar back, take your cigar-

- We're not talking about my
brother's dick, thank you.

(group laughing)

- Oh, we have to mention it.

- [Emily] We have to mention it.
- The entire court saw it, Suntar.

- Yeah.

- Fine.

And she takes it and continues.

She's like, "Oh, unlit." and relights it.

- Since this is a jovial mood-

- [Aabria] Of course.

- And we've really been feeling
the weight of this wager.

- Ooh.

- And we've been trying
to think of a way to

up the ante or-

- Talk to me, I love this.

I have so much money on you.

- Right.
- [Lou] Right.

- So we wanna bet against ourselves.

- Oh yeah, just like the rest of us.

- Yeah.
- [Lou] Yes.

- We just wanna get in on that.

- We want to join you.

- Yeah.

- And you know, hey, everyone's talking.

Everyone knows how mature,

I mean, the reputation just goes up.

- That is true.
- And up and up.

- And the higher it
gets, it, ugh, you know?

- I feel you.

So you wanna bet against yourselves?

- [Lou] Yes.
- [Emily] Yeah.

- Huh?

I mean, that's easily done,

but what's on the line if you win?

That's the part that we
haven't been able to suss out.

- We don't know.

No one ever told us.

- Oh?

- [Lou] I am truly-
- That's fucked.

- I'm not gonna lie,
I'm terrified, Apollo,

that it's just some sort
of moralistic revelation.

(group laughing)

Then they're going to be like,

"And there, the gift was love all along."

(group laughing)
- Yes, yes, yes.

- [Lou] And if that's the case-

- Yes, and if that's the case-

- Fucking kill me.

- Then I am glad this is the last Bloom.

- I swear.

Yeah, exactly, I'm not coming back

if the Bloom has diminished
to the point where

the winnings for a grand
wager are a lesson.

(group laughing)
(Omar clapping)

- Amazing.

Okay, well then, yes,

we're happy to direct you to our bookies

who's kind of hedging bets,

but I mean, now that you're here,

we should have a conversation about

what we can do for each other.

(Lou sighing)
- [Emily] Oh.

- I remember and appreciate your help,

even though I didn't end
up with the crystal heart.

- Which was a damned shame.

- [Aabria] Truly.

- It was deserved.

- That fucking Darkness spell.

- I swear, Suntar, your brother, mm, mm.

- I don't wanna talk about it.

- [Lou] Oh, I know.

- And she crushes her cigar.

- Somebody's dusty.

- You can snort it.

(group laughing)

If it's out, you crushed
it, but it's not wasted.

- Persuasion check.

- Persuasion.

- Or deception

if you are just trying to
get her to do something.

- It's just a nine,

or so I've heard.

(Omar laughing)
(Aabria exhaling)

And then she just kind
of blows it away like-

- Okay, fair, fair.

- Next time.

There's more cigars.

(Aabria sighing)

Yes, my brother not withstanding,

it does make for some
interesting opportunities.

And she moves to Apollo's side

and they both are sort
of just eyeing you down

very interestedly.

- We eye them down even harder.

- Huh.

I still have four cigars in my finger.

(group laughing)

- And you know what?

Yeah, with that, Suntar
is gonna walk forward

and she conjures like
a little, purple flame

at the edge of her fingertips

and lights all four.

(Emily laughing)

In case your birds smoke.

I don't know.
- Oh, you're right.

Hi, babies.
(group laughing)

Did you want some?

Say yes because you have a
vocabulary of 800 to 1.000 words.

(group laughing)

- Well, let's be frank.

- [Lou] Oh, hello.

- We've heard what's been said about you,

that you're secretly in a relationship,

(Lou laughing)

that you are looking for a love match

after having your heart broken.

- Is that being said about me?

- Rumors before the Bloom ever began.

- I like rumors, though.

They add a fog of war to hide behind.

(Aabria laughing)

- If you were looking for matches

and don't mind sort of
eschewing the rigamarole

of making a love match,

the Unseelie Court and Court of Wonder

would be very interested
in forming an alliance.

- Oh!

Are you saying we could go one for one?

- Of course, in whatever your
preferences line up to be.

- I mean, doesn't it

And you don't care that it's, I mean,

do you both have maybe
something on the side

or something so that you
wouldn't be coming into a match

with expectations of
intimacy and whatnot that-

- Give me an insight check

and I'll give you a read on each of them.

- That's gonna be another nat one.

(disappointing music)

- Can I do the same?

- Oof, yes, please.
(Emily laughing)

Your problem is that your birds are

smoking these cigars
and not taking it well.

They're inhaling, so
there's a lot of coughing.

- You have to blow it out.

(group laughing)

You have to blow it out.
- Don't swallow it.

Don't swallow it.

- It's coming out of your cloaca.

- It's about the mouth feel.

It's about the mouth feel.

- It's about mouth feel.

- Uh, 16.
- Yeah.

So while you're kind of
lost in that thought,

(string music)
the thing you see

as your cousin speaks

is that Suntar looks utterly
unfazed about the idea

of something on the side.

This does not matter to her.

There's something hungry for what this is.

- [Lou] Mm-hmm.

And it's not to like be able
to like guess at any sort of

her intent or sexuality.

- Mm-hmm.

- [Aabria] It's just that
it is not even a thought.

- Mm-hmm.

- The look you get from Apollo
is that little bit of a smirk

that you recognize on yourself

when you're sending letters
back and forth with Theodore.

- [Lou] Mm-hmm.

- Of that little, like,

"Yeah, I've got mine and
we don't worry about it."

- Oh.

Might we abscond for a second?

Just me and my cousin.
- [Emily] Yes.

- We have to make sure
that these birds are okay.

- Actually, do you mind
if I leave them here?

(group laughing)

Would you mind terribly
if I leave them here?

They're such chatterboxes and
it might be a private moment.

- [Aabria] No, of course, go ahead.

- Okay.

- [Lou] And in case they vomit-

- Oh, do I have to-

- I'm gonna cast Polymorph
again on the dude

(group laughing)

and turn him into a catfish

and grab him by the tail and
throw him underneath the birds.

They're bottom feeders;
he'll clean it right up.

(group laughing) And I wanna
go stand with my cousin

in the broken, shattered
window from earlier.

(group laughing)
- Amazing.

- I mean, this would
satisfy Grandfather's needs,

would it not?

- Grandfather would truly climax.

(group laughing)
- Yes, he would.

And he seems intent on doing so.

- Yeah, but I mean, this is even,

the match I already had
arranged was, you know,

but this, I mean-

- Yes.

And Suntar, my entire
fucking thing is make a match

and then head back to the Material Plane

to enjoy the short lives
of my beautiful family.

- And the vibes I'm catching
off of her is that's okay.

- That's okay.

- Honestly, Apollo gave me
a look that I don't mind.

- I think the two of you could get down.

Let me just see what they're saying.

And I wanna listen in on my African Grays

and see what's being said.

(Omar and Brennan gasping)

- Amazing.

- [All] Oh!

- Aw, fuck, that's good.

So Prince Apollo's just holding
one of your birds like this.

(Omar laughing)

- I'm still like miming
like we're talking.

- Oh, but you're listening.

Because I wanna make sure the wool

isn't being pulled over on us.

- It's okay, I'll make sure.

Just having a very animated-

- It's a topic of really, okay, yeah,

if I could just be quiet
and you just maybe pretend

like you're telling me
a really animated story.

(group laughing)

- Alright, so what you pick up is

Suntar moving very close

and sort of like whispering
in Prince Apollo's ear

and saying, "We should just tell them.

"We should let them know.

"If we bring them in, they'll
be more likely to say yes."

And you hear Apollo
respond, "Okay, calm down.

"Hold on.

"Let me get rid of Wuvvy and
then we can speak freely."

- I message this to my cousin.

(group laughing)

- Yes.
- [Emily] In my head.

- Yes.

- [Aabria] Oh my God, there's so-

- It's me in your head.

- I'm gonna need a performance check.

- Okay, happily.

- From both of you to
like maintain the listen,

send the spell

and maintain like a
kayfabe of conversation.

- Oh my God.

You know what?

I got so many trinkets I'm gonna burn.

Can I burn one to just succeed?

- [Aabria] Yes.

- Yeah, yeah.

- I'll take a 14.

- 14'll do it.

- Yeah?

Oh, this was from Grandfather.

Take it.

(group laughing)

- And in that moment,

you feel your bandwidth
split in too many directions

and even high, though you are,

your flow through the Arcane Veil

isn't enough to maintain all of this

and your hand sort of instinctively
reaches into your pocket

where you feel that little feather.

You don't remember
putting it in your pocket.

You don't really remember receiving it.

- What feather?

- And it burns away and
you feel a surge of magic

as you sort of step back from yourself

and you're able to maintain equal focus

on all of these things

and all of these pieces in front of you.

And it looks like you're
looking down at a chess board.

- They say women are good at multitasking.

- And in the moment, yeah,
just as this is wrapping up,

Prince Apollo is sort of
like giving a polite, like,

"Wuvvy, you have things to attend to."

She kind of pops up, "Okay, yeah.

"Thank you for the drinks.

"Okay, I've got to a ball,"

and then takes off and leaves.

- Is there a complication to the fact

that we talked about
betting against ourself

in front of Wuvvy?

- I mean, if there is, I don't mind.

- Yeah, right?

She goes and says, "Oh, they
bet against themselves."

There's nothing in the wager

that says we can't bet against ourselves.

- [Lou] Bet against ourselves.

Of course.
- Okay, okay.

- And I'm gonna grab the catfish

and throw it out the
window. (group laughing)

- Ow.

As it hits, it immediately
turns back into Ruyin.

Hold on.

We just have to see how far he dropped.

- Yes, of course.

Did I kill this man?

(group laughing)

- No.
- [Lou] Oh, okay.

- He only dropped a couple stories

but definitely turned back
and took a shit ton of damage.

- Sorry, I overheard you saying,

"Should we tell them something?"

- Oh, damn.
- What?

- What were you talking about?

- How did you?

- Gift of Gab.

Gift of Gab; I did not say that.

- [Aabria] Okay.

- Reaction.

- And he's like, "Why am
I close to the bird now?"

(Surena laughing)

Sorry, what was that?

I missed something.

- It's okay, we're all
smoking a lot of cigars.

- [Lou] Yes.
(Omar laughing)

- Speaking of which, babies?

- Yes.

- Come on.

Come back, take your medicine.

- It's an essential item in
for the Lords of the Wing.

- Smoking?

- Yes.
- Okay.

I'm sorry.

Well, I hope your conversation
was to my satisfaction.

How are you feeling?

I would happily continue to court you.

- I think we are feeling
fantastic about it.

The only loose end would, as you all know,

you have presumably overbearing parents,

and we will need to confer
with our grandfather.

But I think we're going to confer with him

and he's going to be so delighted.

- He scares me.

- [Lou] Oh.

He scares me.
- He's fucking terrifying.

- He threatened to eat us.

- Yeah.
(group laughing)

- Birds often eat their young-
- [Aabria] What?

- And it comes from Grandfather.

(Brennan laughing)

- That's the thing, he just did normally,

and he gave that to birds.
(group laughing)

- Oh no.

He's like all of the bad parts of birds.

- He is all of the bad parts of birds,

but God do I love him.

God, do I love him up there.

- I see you up there.

- In this moment, sort of Prince Apollo

and Princess Suntar,

like looking back and
forth and looking at you

and kind of eyeing you.

- Subtle spell message to my
cousin, "Run interference."

- Apollo, I'm gonna slide my hand-

- On both.

On both.
(Oscar laughing)

- Suntar.
(group laughing)

- And then, while he's
running interference,

I wanna take the truth serum
that I stole from the party

and put it into their drinks.

(group groaning)

- Ooh, barracuda.
- Dang.

(group laughing)

- I wanna show you a bird,

one of my grandfather's
greatest creations.

(group laughing)

- Okay, show us this bird.

- And I'm gonna make a 20 foot pigeon.

(group laughing)

It is called the Pee-geron.

(group laughing)

It's the Piegeron.

- Is it always that size?

- Always.

- Always.

- [Aabria] Oh.

- They are an apex predator.

(group laughing)

- [Lou] Truly.

- The eyes would suggest-

- Oh, you're talking about the eyes?

- [Aabria] Yeah.

- Well, and in that is
their greatest strength

(group laughing)

in that they are always
underestimating the Piegeron.

- The Piegeron.

- Hurry, I couldn't keep this Piegeron.

- Give me a sleight of a hand check,

'cause there are other
people in this room.

- And you still have the Bardic.

- I will, how much is Bardic?

- Eight, D8.

(group laughing)

- I gotta make this work, baby,

so we're going for it.
- I'm gonna let you know-

- 21 plus eight-
- [Lou] Oh.

- 29.

- I was gonna say some shit,
and it truly doesn't matter

(Emily laughing)

about how high the DC was gonna be

'cause there were other people in the room

and then you rolled a 29.

So I'm gonna shut the fuck up

(group laughing)

as you absolutely pour the
truth serum into their drinks.

- So, yes, I-

- That's cool.

Suntar is unimpressed,
like needs less feathers.

- Should we have a toast
to our potential nuptials?

- Oh, it feels only fitting.

In the shadow of the great Piegeron!

(group laughing)

- Well, sure, okay.

Where's my glass?

And Prince Apollo will pick up his glass

and pick up the one beside
it that was for Suntar

and they'll like, take 'em.

Oh, let's get you drinks!

And a servant appears,

like a gold automaton offers you a glass-

- Can I sniff it to see
if they've drugged ours?

- Ooh, yeah, gimme an Arcana check.

- 14.

- You don't smell the presence

of any magical effect on this.

- Okay.

- To possibly being-

- To possibly finding
a strategic marriage.

(group laughing)

- Amazing.

And again, there's no answers
that need to be made tonight.

- [Lou] No.

- And all the-

- It's just chatting.

- I know the DC on this.


- Uh, can I Cutting Words Apollo?

- [Emily] Ooh.

- The one that passed the save?

(Emily clapping)
Yes, of course.

- I don't need to know if
you passed to the save.

- I'm letting you know you ruined my day.

Yeah, he had made, no it's
okay, go ahead, do it.

That's good.

- Aw, but a cool three.

- [Omar] Oh, what is Cutting Word?

- I can knock down an attack
roll, an ability check

or damage roll.

So I guess if this is a
saving throw, I cannot.

So I apologize.

- I'm gonna allow it.

(group cheering)

- Yes!
- [Lou] Okay.

- Love this game.

- Now you two, still on
your respective drugs

that give you a little bit of Arcade Lean,

the way Zone the Truth normally works

is that the caster would have information

about who passed or failed them,

but because this is a
spell effect from a potion,

technically no one would
know if it worked or not.

- [Emily] Mm-hmm.

- But you guys can both
make Arcana checks.

The DC is going to be 17.

If you pass it, you'll know how they did.

- I did not.

Nonstop fails.
- C'mon Lou.

I got this.
(Lou laughing)


Uh uh.

(Brennan laughing)

- That's fine.

- It's a nine.

- That's fine, we can just assume.

- We'll just assume.
- Let's just assume.

- [Aabria] Yeah.

- They both failed.

- Okay.

Truth be told, we heard you over there

talking about whether or
not to tell us something.

And we feel as though
we've been very transparent

and we would, you know,

we said our needs going into this,

and if there's something
that you're not telling us,

of course, we want to know.

- I mean, we're all friends
and potentially lovers here.

- We'll see.
- [Aabria] We'll see.

- Maybe in 40 years.

(Oscar laughing)

- Weirdly specific.
(string music)

And Suntar kind of just folds her hands

and sort of cedes the ground
to Prince Apollo, just,

"Honestly, well,

"if we're going to be
getting into bed together,

"the truth of the matter is
it's been a matter of rumor,

"but also a matter of fact

"that the Unseelie Court has
been looking to curtail access

"to the Mortal Planes.

"And when I originally
reached out to Suntar

"more so to ask why than anything else,

"it occurred to me that
the Court of Wonder

"and the Unseelie Court

"had something interesting in common."

- Hmm.

- "The stockpiling of magic,

"'cause it flows into the
Mortal Realm via those portals.

"But if we had a means to stopper it,

"to bottle it, we could
keep that for ourselves.

"So an Alliance was born and,
man, I don't wanna be crass,

"but since we're speaking so liberally-"

- [Emily] Yeah.

- "We have a bit of a sense
that the Lords of the Wing,

"storied though your house may be,

"is in a bit of disrepair

"and we figured your good name

"deserves good magic behind it again,

"and that bringing you
in would, of course,

"cut you in to our little venture."

And he kinda looks around like,

"Why the fuck did I say all that?"

(group laughing)

- Oh, you have given
us much to think about.

- Much.
- [Emily] And-

- [Aabria] Yes.

- Is it possible that
we could bring this up

with our grandfather as well?

Or shall we just bring
up the potential matches?

- Oh, you,

I leave that to you.

- [Emily] Okay.

- That's on you.

And we obviously don't
expect a response now.

We will say that those of
us sort of in the know,

our colors will be royal
blue at the masquerade.

So were we to see a sign,

we would know that an
accord has been struck.

- What if there's already
a lot of royal blue

in my plumage?
(Oscar laughing)

- Yes, the Sea Foam Court's-

- And so maybe we could

not limit each other's fashion sense?

(group laughing)

Like maybe there's other
signs that we could give.

- Suntar kind of steps in.

- [Lou] Maybe a symbol or something?

- Okay, a symbol?

- [Lou] Yeah.
- Yeah, like a hand sign.

- Or like a pin,

like if we're all wearing
like a little strawberry

right on the collar.

- Oh, a little strawberry.

Can we do strawberries?

Can we do strawberries?
(hands clapping)

- A strawberry on the
collar means you're in?

(group laughing)

- How about this?
- [Lou] Okay.

- If you two wear a
strawberry on your collar.

- Well now I just wanna
wear it no matter what.

- We'll know.


How about this? We'll have a conversation

and that way we don't
have to do a weird signal.

- [Lou] Great.

- That's Apollo's whimsical bullshit.

- No, but I will probably
wear royal blue if I'm in,

if we're in,

and a strawberry,

so that's how you know I'm doubly in.

If it's a strawberry royal blue-

- [Emily] Ooh!

- Here we go.

- [Emily] And just one last thing-

- Mm-hmm.

- While we're speaking so candidly.

Have you read "The Green
Hunter?" (group laughing)

- I was just wondering
what you thought of it.

- And Suntar looks up
in that moment is just,

"Yeah, and I heard they were
gonna make it into a movie."

- Yes, they are.

- Yeah, they are, yeah.

I think so.

- And we're looking for a green hunter.

(group laughing)

- Wait, are you making the movie?

- [Lou] No!

- Are you associated with the production?

- Well, I have friends.

- [Emily] No, no, no, no.

- No, no, no, no.

Gift of Gab, Gift of Gab.

(group laughing)
Gift of Gab.

- [Aabria] And we're
gonna wipe from there.

(group laughing)

Gift of Gab is a great cleanup spell.

- God, they almost found
out who Airry Pearry was.

(group laughing)

- I just realized, is "Airry" a play-

- Airavis.

- Well, because aerie
is where birds are kept,

an aerie.

- Yeah.
- I didn't know that.

(group laughing)

Just say that you did.

(group laughing)

You've known, I've known, we've all known.

Thanks, man.

(Aabria laughing)

- Do you think,

I'll hand that off to you.

(group gasping)

- I mean, it's-

- [Emily] PDR.

- It's a shared-
- It's shared.

- If you wanna keep it on the squad.

- I'll put it right on the edge.

- [Aabria] Yeah.

- If you need it.

- [Aabria] Oh no.

Oh, this is disastrous.

- I got it.

Oh, like that?

Like that?
- There you go, betwixt you.

(group laughing)

However, we pick up like a day later

as the invitations have been

officially submitted and distributed,

that the ball is a masquerade theme.

The colors are black, white, and gold.

- [Lou] Hmm.

- And it will be taking place,

not in the palace ballroom proper,

but in a little, secluded area off-site,

a little grotto that's being
purposed specifically for this.

So, let's just call it
the day of the ball.

- [Lou] Ooh.

- What's everyone getting up to?

Are there any preparations?

- What is everyone wearing?

- [Aabria] Yeah?
- The ball.

- Well, is it the ball now

or is it the day preparing for the ball?

- If there was anything you wanted to do

in advance of the ball,

I'm treating it like a, yeah,

it's gonna take like a couple
hours to get ready for this.

You know, like prom.

- Like prom.

(Omar laughing)

- I visit the living quarters of BINX.

- So I think before you come over,

BINX is definitely trying
to tidy as much as they can.

So they're kind of flitting around.

They're shoving a bunch of like,

they have a clown doll

and they're putting it in their wings.

They take a deflated basketball

and they're putting it in their wings

and they're trying to like
only keep out the fancy stuff.

So it's just like a bunch of
like silverware and plates,

just like as decoration

and various like feather boas everywhere.

- I knock on your door.
(door knocking)

- Coming.

And I am wearing,

like everything has been
really like formal, right?

- [Aabria] Mm-hmm.

- So I'm just wearing
like the Fey equivalent

of like leggings and a dirty T-shirt.

So whatever the Fey equivalent is of that.


- Hello?

Is this okay?

And I glance out to the hallway.

Uh, good day, BINX.

Do you mind if I step in very quickly?

- Oh, of course.

Yeah, come in.

- Great, not a vampire.

And I close the door.
(Oscar laughing)

I had an interesting
request, if that's all right.

- Okay.

- I wanted to put together
an outfit for later today,

for the ball.

- Oh.

- And I have some that are pre-selected,

but I thought in order to make
somewhat of an appearance,

I was wondering if maybe I could

bother your talents a little bit?

- I would be so happy to craft you a suit

or anything you want.

What are you thinking?

What statement do you wanna make?

- Prince of Darkness.

- Darkness?
(group laughing)

- [Omar] Yeah.
- Great, great, great.

- [Omar] Yeah.

- And BINX is pulling through her drawers

and is taking out various fabrics.

Continue, describe!

- Oh, something,

if you stared at it for a long time,

it would look like obsidian stalagmites,

like collected together.

That's sort of the pattern of it.

But you don't wanna look for too long.

- So I'm gonna do hypnotizing stalagmites.

Great, great, great.

Okay, uh huh, uh huh.

And I flip a mannequin
that had been tipped over.

I flip it and it goes upright
and I start like I'm sewing.

- [Aabria] Yes.

- Wow, that was absolutely fantastic.

- [Surena] No, no, no, continue.

- Oh, yeah.

- So I'm throwing rocks on it

and I'm like bead working rocks.

Uh huh?
- [Omar] Oh, great.


- Form-fitting, okay.

Arms out.

- Like as if I'm?

- Out right now.

- Oh, oh, yes.

Oh yeah.

- I'm measuring you.

- Mm-hmm, great, yes.

- [Surena] Okay?

- Thank you, okay, yeah.

- Uh huh?

- And, you know what, fuck it,

maybe like a little like
gemstone rock crown.

- [Surena] Gemstone rock crown.

- Of sorts, like a cave
crown, whatever that would be.

- [Surena] A cave crown?

- Yeah.

Or like a cave tiara.

Maybe not a full crown,
not the whole thing.

Just like a head piece.
- No, no, no.

Hey, you can get a full crown.

You don't have to get a
half crown or a tiara.

You can get a full crown.

- Great.

In that case, a full crown please.

(Omar laughing)

- Right.

From like the back, it's
like my living quarters

sort of expand as I'm moving through them.

So if we're close, it seems really small,

but I can like move further out
and it gets a little larger.

I now have a welding mask and some flame

and I am welding you your crown currently.

This might take a little bit.

Thank you for trusting me with this.

This is great.

I actually haven't made
anything for anyone else

in a really long time.

So this is like one of
the best days I've had

in probably a while.

- Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that,

and so glad I'm able to change
that pattern, I suppose.

(Omar laughing)
- Well, you know, it's fine.

You get used to being
alone. You know what I mean?

Like you make friends
like, and then, you know,

they only have short
lifespans, all of them.

And so then you just get new
friends for a little bit.

- Most of my friends
were rocks growing up.

(Omar laughing)
(Brennan laughing)

- That's right, you did say that.

- And my dog.

- So you're used to
being kind of alone then?

- Yes, actually.

Yes, absolutely.

So something we have in common, I suppose.

- [Surena] Yeah.
- Yeah.

- But you come from a court, though.

I guess I don't really
understand why you were alone

when you had a court of
people who would, you know,

support you and be around you
and would give you cocoa and-

- Oh, cocoa support.

- [Surena] And blankets
and stuff, and like-

- That would be nice.
- Is that not?

- No, no, the sort of general
philosophy, I suppose,

of the Unseelie Court is one of

very intense and unhealthy stoicism,

I would go so far as to say.

- [Surena] Mm-hmm.

- Where I to have any notes,

of which I have many of my family.

My mother, the Queen of Air and Darkness.

- Yes, I've heard of your mother.

(Omar laughing)

- That's an accurate.

What have you heard?

And you cannot offend me,
if I'm being quite honest.

- Well, I've heard that she is

the Queen of Air and
Darkness, both in and out.

She has and contains no heart or care

for anything other than herself.

That's what I've heard, but
I'm not sure if that's true.

And obviously, if she has children,

she must care about those, you.

- You would think.

No, no, no, no.

She definitely cares about the
reputation of her offspring-

- [Surena] Mm-hmm.

- And her creations.

But, no, if I may share
some personal information-

- Oh, I would love nothing more.

Please, like, sparks everywhere.

(dramatic music)

- She keeps everyone very separate

because sentiment, where I
grew up, is seen as a weakness,

which I thought was
funny because I thought,

well, that's fear then, you're
scared of something, right?

- [Surena] Mm-hmm.

- And that wasn't taken too well.

They called me a very emotional child.

I was often described as
hysterical, 'cause I would laugh.

Sometimes my laughter would
carry through the caverns

and they actually, this thing
I have in the back of my neck,

this elemental shard,

was put in such that
anytime I am emotional,

a cloud forms over my head.

- She kind of lowers her welding tools.

She flips open her mask and says,

"Your mother put something inside of you

"so you wouldn't feel feelings?"

- Oh, well, it's not that I,

they realized pretty quickly
I couldn't stop the feelings.

So it was sort of like a
humiliation tactic in a way

to say, like, if you're gonna feel them,

it's going to literally rain on you

and then you'll just be, you know,

wet and miserable for a bit.

- Please pardon me if I am too forward

in asking this question.

Can I see it?

- Yes, absolutely.

And I turn and I move
the collar of my robe.

- What does it look like?

Like can I tell how it
was inserted in them?

- Yeah, I suppose it wouldn't take, oh,

it wasn't done with any
high intense crafting magic.

It was kind of a punishment.

So, I imagine you'd be able to.

- So what you see is this
like swirling, black,

it's obsidian,

but instead of like that
snowflake defect inside it,

you see somehow darker
black that's deeper.

Whereas like this shininess of
the obsidian reflects light,

these like dark spots catch it

and you feel yourself like
instinctively moving into it.

It is driven in the back
of his neck as a spike

and his skin has grown around it.

And the very edges of it,

no matter how long you've
had this, they're still raw.

It's still unhealed, but
it's there and it's solid.

And you can see,

even as he kind of adjusts himself,

like the musculature of
his neck and shoulders,

everything has shifted to hold this piece,

but it is not of him.

- Well, there was no
care in its placement.

- Mm-hmm.

- We're new friends,

and I don't want to do anything

that would make you
uncomfortable or fearful.

But if ever you feel like
you want this removed,

please know that I can do it.

- [Lou] Mm-hmm.

- And they search for words.

And while they might have like read them,

I think the emotional
vocabulary isn't quite there yet

to fully respond.

And like all those attempts

at grasping and holding onto that feeling

is almost like grabbing
at smoke a little bit.

- [Surena] Mm-hmm.

- And so instead, the prince finds one way

through which to communicate everything

and just turns to you and
looks directly at you,

as I think a little bit of
like a cloud forms over,

but it's like a very
stable, like coastal storm

that just sits on a cliff
side for like a couple days.

- [Surena] Mm-hmm.

- It has been the nature of my family

to pit siblings against one
another for quite a time,

because there was this
idea of scarcity of love

in my family.

And nothing quite clicked

until hearing you talk about magic.

The way you see magic
is that magic is love,

a plant reaching up for the sun,

the affinity between people and things.

- [Surena] Mm-hmm.

- And it occurred to me that,

the Fey, we treat magic as
if there is scarcity to it

in the same way that we feel that

there's a scarcity to love.

And it's something to manipulate,

move around like pieces on a game board.

That can't be correct.

(soft piano music)
- For me, in my Court,

magic is love.

Magic is feelings.

Magic is anger.

Magic is, you know, is everything,


there are Fey out there

who do wish to withhold

or keep, capture, siphon magic.

And, as such,

is, you know, why I,

that's what happened to everyone.

Except for I found a loophole, you see.

I found a way to create sort of like a,

I don't know another term for it

other than a washing machine,

like a spinning cycle
of movement and magic

that can happen between
belief and the Mortal Plane.

And I work with

three others who believe in me

and together, we create magic.

And that's how I am here.

The last Weaver of Fate,

the one, you know, the
leader, they are a tree now.

They are a tree,

just a beautiful, static
tree in the Mortal Plane.

They couldn't get back.

And that's what happens.

We have to be able to come
back and then go there because

we are of here, so.

And at a loss for words,

and realizing that they
said so many things,

she starts kind of frantically
working back onto the-

- I'm gonna need a performance
check to create this outfit.

- Yes.

- The DC is 20.

(group gasping)

- Oh.

- Oh.

- Oh, okay I'm going to
roll lucky, roll lucky.

(Surena groaning)

Okay, okay.

DC is 20?
- Mm-hmm.

- I rolled a 17.

17 plus seven.

- 24.

- Ooh, 24!

- Amazing.

So yeah, you're able
to construct this crown

and this sort of dark
stalagmite, stalactite

outfit to match it.

- [Surena] Mm-hmm.

- And you continue talking and move on.

Do you have one more thing?

I'm gonna bounce away
from you in a second.

- Yeah, is it okay?

- Yeah, go ahead.

- Andhera collects all the information.

And as you finish that,
Andhera just very gently,

they put like one hand on
your shoulders to turn you.

- [Surena] Yeah.

- And-

(Emily humming)

(Aabria laughing)

(Emily humming)

- Studio audience.
(group laughing)

(Emily humming)

- Sorry, your moment.

- Their hand across
(group laughing)

the shoulder blades.

Before I was established as a prince

to go out into the world,
I was a squire of sorts,

the way that my court works.

And after being a squire,
right before being a prince,

I was a knight.

Lady BINX, what is the
royal term for your Courts?

- We don't abide by the formal titles.

We're a house.

We're a home.

- Well, in that case, may I,

and I look around

and I wanna say I grab
like a cardboard tube.

- [Surena] Mm-hmm.
(Aabria laughing)

- And I hand it to you.
- Mm-hmm.

- And I kneel.

I pledge my oath to your cause.

(Brennan gasping)

And let's bring this
entire fucking thing down.

- And I, in remembering courtly things,

like I knight you and I say, "Let's."

- [Lou] Ooh.

- [Emily] Yeah.

- Oh my God, that's beautiful.
(group applauding)

And we move from there and this moment.

Can I ask above,

is there anything Hob would
wanna do before we get-

- Specifically? No.

- Then we will sort of follow
(whimsical music)

Captain Hob

as he makes his way to
the masquerade ball.

You move down through the
city and to another gate

burrowed into that massive retaining wall.

And you see it open up on
another pocket dimension

of grassy, fern-covered woods.

And moving down into it, you
see sunken in front of you,

this beautiful, marble
flooring dropped down.

It's pretty, but it looks like a ruin

and you don't see anyone else there.

It looks empty, but looks are deceiving,

like a masquerade.

And as you make your way
through this little valley

to get inside,

the moment you cross the threshold,

you are inside this
massive, gilt building.

There's gold and chandeliers hanging down

and no sky overhead.

The floor is that same beautiful marble,

but it's covered with well-decorated--

(group gasping)

- It's beautiful.

- Wow!

- Wow, wow, wow.

- [Aabria] And you hear a full-

- Do you see this?

- You hear a full orchestra playing

and there are servants that are lesser Fey

offering drinks and refreshments.

And you are there, at a live, festive,

popping ball.

What is?
(Oscar beatboxing)

Yeah, we're gonna do a
fit check for the squad.

Let's start with Captain Hob.

- Captain Hob, lowborn as he is,

is dressed in the colors of the theme.

Hob received a thing like,

(group chattering)

this is literally like most of the high,

but I think it's also because
most of the highborn Fey

are like, "Oh, the
theme is white and gold,

"so if I wanna make a splash,
I should come wearing X."

- [Aabria] Yes.

- And Hob is here in white and gold.

He has a cream,
(Surena laughing)

he looks like the architecture now.

- [Surena] Directions.

- And Hob is doing this for two reasons.

One, it occurred to him that he was like,

"Well, oh, that's the theme,

"so that's probably required, mandatory."

(group laughing)

And then someone was like, you
know, "It's not mandatory."

And he was like, "Very well,
it shall be an advantage

"should any stealth be required."

(group laughing)

So he's wearing this
beautiful, cream military coat

with gold brocade and a deep gold sash

that runs across

that he has rearranged all his medals on

now that it's a new uniform,

also to disguise that one
of his medals is missing.

(group gasping)

- [Surena] Awe.

- He has his formal halberd with him

that is a beautiful, ceremonial halberd.

So the blade is an edge of fairy steel

inlaid with platinum and ivory

and little hints of gold in it.

And he has his military cap that has a,

again, the tall, cavalry officer's cap

that is again, cream,
white with a golden bill

and golden sort of, you know, plate here.

And I think that the last bit of the fit

is a tiny, golden chain
going to a monocle.

- Ooh.
- And-

(Aabria laughing)

- What, is that purely
cosmetic, or was that?

- [Brennan] Purely cosmetic.
- I'm-

- [Brennan] Purely cosmetic and-

- Oh, okay.
- He doesn't need it to see?

- He don't need it!
(group laughing)

- Oh, the sash is not straight
like his normal red sash is.

It's very like ruffled
and has folds to it,

so he's hidden all his
little potions in there.

- Ooh.

- And also he has white gloves

that are sort of fitted

where his claws burst
out of the tip of them.

- Amazing.

Go ahead and give me a perception check

as you arrive and scan the crowd.

- Oh, seven.

- Okay.

You're not super aware
of like other people,

but in a new environment,
default to the basics.

Where are the exits and
where are my people?

So you very quickly spot Boil and Blemish,

who arrived a little bit before you.

They're wearing deep green

and you see them walking
with Lady Sylmenar,

a lady in waiting to Queen
Titania of the Seelie Court.

And attendants of the Seelie Court

are kind of walking back and
forth and conferring with them

and taking off in other directions.

And you make eye contact
with both Boil and Blemish

and they give you a very respectable,

but non-invitation

nod and curtsy and bow

and sort of move forward,
continuing their talks.

- My Lord and Lady.

And I will retreat and go
stand by the punch bowl.

(group laughing)

- Amazing.

Let's get, hey, Lady Chirp Featherfowl.

- [Emily] Yeah?

- As you rock up, what's
you wearing, girl?

- I think I've used Fabricate

to make a dress entirely of masks.

(group gasping)

- [Surena] Ooh!

- Shut up.
- [Emily] yeah.

- Incredible.

- [Aabria] Yes.

- Now I need to ask you a question.

- [Aabria] Yes.
- For a bit.

How long does Invoke Duplicity last?

- In this instance, it
will only be five minutes.

- Okay.

That's not worth carrying my train.

I will-

- A second you.

- Oh my God!

- I really wanted to be a
second me carrying my train.

(Emily laughing)

- [Aabria] I don't know,
that's good for an entrance.

- A feathery entrance.

- The second you could
carry the train and then-

- But I can also do Unseen
Servant, AKA Unseen Bird-vent.

(group laughing)

- [Aabria] No!

- To carry my train.

- Okay.

- So I'll just do that.

And then I think like,

Cousin, I think you
understand my conflict with-

- I mean, of course.

- The idea of closing
off the Material Plane.

- All of that good-good

just on the other side of the portal.

(group laughing)

- That good-good, indeed.

- I hate that.

- And, I mean, it would
be a loss for you as well.

You'd never meet your niece.

- I would never get to get
blackout drunk with my niece.

(group laughing)

- Again, we just have to
wait a little bit longer.

- So are we wearing
royal blue or are we not?

Because I have decisions I need-

- There is a royal blue mask in here, but-

- [Aabria] Ooh.

- We'll do a very small thing.

A small thing.

So no strawberry.

- Okay.

I'm saying like, I'm
not on board with this,

but are we stringing them along?

- I mean, of course we're
stringing them along.

- Okay, but I affix a little strawberry.

- I'm all about the string, all right?

(Emily laughing) I don't care
what's at the other end of it.

- [Emily] Okay.
- It's the string I love.

- Yeah.

So we dress accordingly and
I've done all my bullshit.

I'm assuming you don't
want me to walk you through

all the different spells I've

cast on myself?
- Look,

when it comes up, I will assume
you've done your homework.

- Great, I did all my math.

- I can like see notes written from there

and I'm like, yeah, I'm
not gonna check your work.

You did it.
(Emily laughing)

- Yeah, that's me.

- Perfect.

Okay, well-

- As much as I wanna Invoke Duplicity

to have myself carrying my own train,

I gotta save that shit.

Oh, but I will take, though,

the potion that gives me
advantage on performance checks.

- Love that, cool.

What you rocking up in?

- All white.
(group gasping)

I think it's all waistcoat,
cravat, fucking trousers, coat.

All white.

And then instead of my normal black cape,

it's a cape of literal molten gold

(group moaning)

that I think leaves ethereal,
golden drops behind me

that then disappear after a moment.

But it's literally I'm dripping.

- [Aabria] That's so fucking cool.

(group laughing)

- But yes, in all the white,

I have one cufflink that
is a royal blue stone

and one cuff link that is a strawberry.

- Oh, that's so good.

- Ooh.

- Why haven't y'all been doing
fit checks since day one?

(group laughing)

- We've been dressing
reasonably, you know?

(group laughing)

And I am going to bring
my two charm potions.

And when I walk in,

I'm going to cast Polymorph
on one of the attendants.

- [Aabria] Yes, good.

- And turn them into a little salmon.

(group laughing)

And then, the other one,

I'm then going to lean in and say,

"If you don't want the same
thing to happen to you,

"you're not going to mention this."

And I'm gonna take one of
the love potions that I have

and just drop it on into

another one of the glasses
on the serving tray,

shatter the thing, have a great night.

(group laughing)

- Intimidation check.

- Of course.


- It's fun, 'cause the attendants are

largely Court of Sea
Foam and they're like,

"I mean, being a fish isn't terrible,

"but I don't want it, not now."

(Emily laughing)

- 24.

- Why am I rolling?

Yeah, okay.

This person just,

(no audio)

and you see them blink
and like a second blink,

a second set of eyelids,

and they're like, "I didn't see shit."

And they just turned and walk away.

(Oscar laughing)

- But yeah, there's just one of them,

somebody tonight is falling in love.

- Love that.
- [Lou] Ooh, ooh.

- And I do have my African Grays
on me, just for the record.

- Perfect.


We come around to Rue.

- Yes.

So I would like to come in with Wuvvy,

like both of us coming in together.

- [Aabria] Okay.

- And we're both wearing

complementary outfits to each other.

Whatever I wear, Wuvvy's wearing.

I'm wearing all black,

an entirely beautiful, black
ball gown from head to toe.

So Wuvvy's wearing all white.

- [Aabria] Mm-hmm.

- Same design.

Cascading down the bust area,

all the way down to the end of the train,

are just dyed black peonies.

- Ooh.

- And so, Wuvvy's also
wearing white peonies.

And then in the bottom,

the underskirt is made
out of liquid material

in honor of the Sea Foam Court.

So as I'm gliding down the ball,

it looks as if I'm floating on water,

surfing, if you will.
- Wow.

- Surfboard.

- Yes, there is a peony
crown on the top of my head

and adorned around my neck

is the only subtle white that I'm wearing,

which is a pearl necklace.

And I'm wearing a gold ring as well.

It's massive, 'cause I have giant claws.

- Yeah.

- Inside the ring,

there is the medal of courage
(group gasping)

that Hob gave me, concealed
for no one to see.

- That's so good.

(Emily laughing)

Gimme an insight check for Wuvvy.

- Hmm, okay.


- You know her very well,

and, obviously, this being
like one of these center points

and one of the climaxes of the Bloom,

she is notably and
reasonably like harried,

trying to get everything
set up and ready to go.

But even now, as everything is in place

and really whatever is gonna
happen is going to happen,

she still seems a little quiet.

Not unpleasant,

but just a little more reserved
and standoffish than normal.

- Mm-hmm.

I mean, I do want to address and say,

"Wuvvy, is everything alright?

"I know that there's much to be done,

"and thank you so much for entertaining me

"on this grand entrance."

- Thank you.

It's very nice to be
able to walk beside you.

I'm good, thank you.

- Wuvvy, if there's anything,
of course, you know.

- Thanks.

Yeah, I know.

This is good.

We're good.

This is beautiful.

You did a great job.

And she-
- Then I let it go.

- Yeah.

She lingers for like
a moment too long also

and then turns and continues and moves out

to like check on things so
you can enjoy the night.

And finally, BINX.

- BINX is wearing a black, velvet dress

that was taken from a curtain.

So, you know, like those heavy curtains?

- [Aabria] Yeah.

- She created a very like slinky dress

that has a very like high slit.

And across her chest
are different objects,

some of them toy, some
of them lost jewelry,

some of them broken pieces of glass.

That's sort of like almost
these objects are adhered

to look almost like feathers.

So they're just very placed.

She has a hood

and then the hood kind of
is in the shape of like

owl bear ears.

- [Aabria] Nice.

- And she has a gold
mask that is made of keys

that has a beak.

- Ooh.

- Oh.
- That's so cool.


And as you move down and in,

you notice that you are being noticed.

- [Surena] Mm-hmm.

- Those who didn't sort
of witness your arrival

at an earlier event,

everyone is here now.

- Mm-hmm.

- And you hear whispers
about the Weaver of Fate

and the last of the Court of Craft,

but all of that kind of falls away

as you feel a taste that begins
in the back of your throat

and moves across your tongue.

Sensation and flavor together,

a fizzing bitterness that you recognize as

the call of one of your warlocks.

- So I make my entrance

and I immediately run to the restroom.

(group laughing)

- Hob's like, "I get it.

"Honestly, I get nervous
making a big entrance, too.

"Yeah, for sure."

- Someone's saying,

"Excuse me, you're in the
front of the punch bowl."

(group laughing)

- Oh, sorry.

I just start ladling for people.

(group laughing) I think
they think I work here.

(group laughing)

- Amazing.

Yeah, so you sprint for a bathroom.

- [Surena] Mm-hmm.

- What do you do?

- Is it a private bathroom?

I mean, in my mind, I'm
picturing a regular bathroom.

- It is a regular bathroom, yeah.

- Thank you, cool.

I whip out my magnifying
glass and I go, "Hello?"

- Yeah.

And you see a little
like ochre-colored Kobold

pop into frame, like eyeball first

and then backs up like, "Hey.

(whimsical music)

- [Surena] Hey.

- Hi, BINX.

You look cool.

What's up?

- What up?

No, you.

Hi, Scratch, what's up?

- [Aabria] Yeah.

- What do you need?

- I just wanted to check in.

It's been a while.

- How are you?

Are you okay?

Are you safe?

- Um, okay, no, I'm gonna be very honest.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

- So, and you see that
whatever sort of object

is allowing him to see you as well,

he kind of turns it over his shoulder

as this massive, swirling darkness

is devastating what looks
like a small like hamlet

(Surena gasping)

of like thatched-roofed, little homes.

Anyway, I'm with some friends and,

hey, I, there's a thing.

It's invisible and killing everyone.

- [Surena] Oh my God.
- Do you have any advice

on how to kill it?

- It's invisible and
it's killing everyone?

- [Aabria] Yeah.

- All right.

- I burned one of my spell
slots. It's an invisible stalker.

What is that and how
do you do a hit to it?

(group laughing)

I'm just looking for some advice.

I got like six seconds.

- Oh, Jesus Christ.

Okay, so, I'm gonna assess him

to see like if I can
grant him extra power.

- Yeah, okay.

Give me an Arcana check.

- Okay.

Oh buddy.

Oh, oh, oh!

That is a 22.

- [Aabria] Ooh.
- Okay?

- Amazing.

The feeling you get from
him as you look at him

and kind of look him over

and then look him over
with like your Arcane Eyes,

you see that he has taken
some damage already.

- [Surena] Yeah.

- He's already scuffed up.

And he seems to look low on magic.

Like those low, small spells
that you can cast forever,

Cantrips, are still available to him,

but he seems to be out of his big guns.

- So in seeing that,

and seeing that he is
in dire need of help,

I take off my mask and I
concentrate very, very hard.

And I take the craft magic
that I use to create this mask

and I give it to him.

And so what that looks like is

I know that it's six
seconds, so if everything is-

- Oh, we're doing this in D&D bullet time.
- [Surena] Okay.

- Which is like 20
minutes for six seconds.

- [Surena] Great, great, great, great,
great. - It's like a football game.

- But it starts to become
fuzzy, like out of focus.

And then I put it into my wing

and I do my best to grant
him another spell slot.

- Let's make this a die roll.

- [Surena] Okay.

- And I'm gonna let you tell me

what you're rolling to do this.

- Okay.

Oh boy, I'm gonna be rolling-

- The DC is going to be 20.

- [Surena] Okay.

- To send him one spell slot,

25 to refresh everything on him.

- [Surena] Mm-hmm.

- And give him the effect of a short rest.

And if you hit a 30, something else.

You could always burn a token.

- For Scratch?
- How many have you got?

- I have three.

- Is he worth it?

- For Scratch?
- For Scratch.

- For fan favorite, Scratch?

- For fan favorite, Scratch.

- For beloved,
(group laughing)

season-long arc-ing Scratch?

- Who is Scratch?

(group laughing)
(hands clapping)

- You don't know Scratch?

(group laughing)

That's his catch phrase, number one.

(group laughing)

- It is!

- Yeah.

- You don't know Scratch?

- [Emily] You don't know Scratch!

- Well, cause he's
always in the other room.

(Aabria laughing)

It's his thing.

- I'm going to burn this feather

and I think it's because I obtained it

while, as Gwyndolin-

- [Aabria] Yeah.

- And I don't feel like it was rightfully,

I mean, it was earned,

but it was myself being
somebody else to earn it.

- [Aabria] Yeah.

- So I'm burning this to send my magic

to Scratch.

- You hold your mask.
(whimsical music)

- [Surena] Mm-hmm.
- And it goes fuzzy.

And you actually feel
something come away from it

as this feather drops.
- [Surena] Mm-hmm.

- And you feel the
great and powerful magic

that a token holds,

this small nexus of arcane.

And you tuck it into your wing.

- [Surena] Mm-hmm.

- And you see Scratch's
wounds begin to close.

- Mm-hmm.

- And he kind of flexes

and you see the aura around
him glow brighter again

as he's like, "Hey, I
think I'm back in it."

- Hey, you look great!

- Thanks!

You're so good at this.

Any final advice?

I gotta go.

My turn's up in a sec.

(group laughing)
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Smoke, sand.

If it's invisible, smoke and sand.

- That's great.

- Yeah.

- All right, fog cloud coming in.

Thanks, boo.

He like tucks it.

- You don't know Scratch?

- You don't know Scratch?

- This fall, the CW.

- You don't know?
(group laughing)

- It's a really young, attractive Kobold.

- What'd you say?

You don't know Scratch?

(group laughing)

And that's most of the scenes.

- [Omar] He sounds like it's available.

- Yeah.

- And you make your way
from this and back out

and realize that everyone
at the masquerade

is waiting for you-

- [Lou] Ooh.

- Because as the holder
of the crystal heart,

no one gets to dance-

- Oh!

- [Aabria] Until you open the floor.

- I have responsibilities!

- Whoops!

- [Aabria] Yeah.

- Yeah, I mean, I really like her but-

- I wanna dance!

- Maybe she's being fashionably late.

She is very fashionable.

Mock wings are so in.

- They're so in.

- Slam the bathroom door open.

(group laughing)

- That's where your actual
entrance comes from,

the shitter.
(group laughing)

- When BINX heads to the floor
to start the first dance,

where is Andhera?

- Where is Andhera?

- I made a pit stop.

- Oh!

- Andhera made a pit stop.

- Where?

To the jewelers, hmm?

- [Aabria] To the jewelers.
- Oh my God.

(group laughing)

- Something to go get your pit stop on.

- Wearing my glasses, Oscar.

(group laughing)

I approach as everyone's kind
of, you know, trailing in,

with a court of Tricksters.

- Ooh.

- I go to the Trickster Court
and the way I approach them-

- [Aabria] Yeah.

- Because anytime you approach them,

they're always doing little tricks.

- They're doing little tricks.

- My face falls into the
familiar stature that I had

before I even came to the Bloom.

- [Aabria] Mm.

- I've come to offer something.

I've come to offer something.

- So you walk up and you see Fable.

- [Omar] Mm-hmm.

- The leader of the Trickster Court

is a red haired man with
his feet on backwards.

- Mm-hmm.
(Brennan gasping)

- And he's leaning in and
speaking conspiratorially

to none other than Viscountess Grabalba.

(Brennan gasping)

- Viscountess, good to see you again.

- And she gives you a little look like,

"This is embarrassing.

"What are you doing?"

(Omar laughing)

- But a moment of your time, I assure you.

I was hoping to come into
the possession of two items.

One item, but two of them,

that I will be passing on
as gifts later this evening.

And it seems that quite a
bit of trickery will be done

with these items.

At least, that's the intended purpose.

Maybe a bit of humility as well.

- Talk to me.

Tell me what you want.

- Hmm.

Actually, humiliation.

- Oh, now we're speaking
the language that I love.

Tell me more, young man.

- I will tell you exactly what I wish.

You will have to nab them
from the Court of Wonder,

but I suppose they're all so occupied

(Aabria groaning)
with that huge ball.

- A struggle,

to be sure.
- And what a hilarious event

it would be

were things to go incredibly wrong.

Am I right?

- I have to ask, young prince.

- [Omar] Mm-hmm?

- What have I done to deserve such a gift?

(Omar laughing)

- It's just part of something I'm doing.

(Brennan laughing)

- He just like smirks.

- All right, keep your secrets.

(group laughing)

Let me know what you have in mind.

- Tokens.

A duel lost; humiliation.

- Oh.

- And a trick that I myself
pulled on someone else.

- Oh!

- Wow.
(fingers snapping)

- Woo!

- These are things of
great import to feeling,

as important as the material.

I can craft wonders with this.

- [Omar] Can you?

- Yes.

- Great. Good, well,
that's why I came to you.

- [Aabria] Yeah.
(Omar laughing)

- So good.

Let me tell you what I want,

and then I will hastily go to the ball

with those items in tow.

- Mm-hmm.

- Oh, by the way, your feet, backwards?

(group laughing)

Who are you even?

(Brennan laughing)


- [Aabria] Harder to hunt.

- Oh.

- They think I'm running the other way.

- I see, 'cause of your
feet being backwards?

- [Aabria] Mm-hmm.

- And they think you're
running the other way?

- [Aabria] Yes.

- It's brilliant.

And it's working.

- You don't need to flatter me.

(Omar laughing)

I'm already invested.

- [Omar] Then I won't;
I'll quit while I'm ahead.


And I whisper-
- Yes.

- [Omar] The item of
two that I would like.

- And you see the magic flare

behind Fable's eyes.
- [Omar] Oh shit, wow, okay.

- As almost like an unrolling spider web

out and away.

You can feel it across your skin.

He's analyzing the
thousands upon thousands

of permutations of possibilities

that can be wrought with this.

And his mouth begins to like,

he is like slavering and like salivating

at the potential.

- If you could deliver
those to me at the ball,

I would very much appreciate it.

And, Viscountess, you're
looking so nasty tonight.

I just wanna say, so nasty.

You look filthy tonight.

(group laughing)

Look at you.

- Stop that!

- I have to leave, so nasty.

(group laughing)

And as I make my way, I keep glancing back

and I'm just like, "So nasty."

(group laughing)

- So sorry.

- Do you see this?

Do you see how nasty she's being tonight?

- She's just glowing and beaming

as she falls back into
conversation with Fable.

And then we move to the ball.

You're in your outfits.

- [Omar] Mm-hmm.

- With your crown on.
- [Omar] Mm-hmm.

- And you feel your
pocket, your right pocket,

just go a little bit heavy.

- [Omar] Hmm.

- As a pair of twin items

were delivered into it
discreetly, always discreetly.

- Ugh, what a good trick.

- And before you can
interact and move forward,

you see BINX open up the bathroom door

as all the music kind of
goes grinding to a halt

and eyes turn to you.

- Everything was fine in there.

(Omar laughing)

- Oh cousin, I think she
took a shit. (group laughing)

- And it seems she wants us
to know that she is regular.

- She will be light on her feet, indeed.

(Oscar laughing)

- I try to make everyone start applauding.

(group applauding)

- Thank you.


Wait, what?

- Your responsibility.

(group laughing)

- Dance floor?

- Can I turn to and Andhera

as BINX is having this
interaction with Rue?

- Mm-hmm.

(Brennan sighing)
- Brother?

- Hm?

- Are you gonna marry Grabalba, for real?

(group laughing)

Someone's gotta.

Is it gonna be you?

- I could, if you need me to,

but it's not quite in my direct line of-

- It's gotta be a yes or no, my man.

Tell me what it is.

- If that's it, no, I'm sorry.
- Okay, great.

And I would like to like
with like giving advantage,

like trip attack you
stumbling towards BINX

coming outta the bathroom.

- Amazing.

- I see what Hob is doing,

and I will attempt to do the exact same.

(group laughing)

- [Aabria] Yes!
(group laughing)

Cool, let's get some like,

honestly just give me an
attack roll, both of you.

(group laughing)

What are Andhera and BINX's DCs?

- Yeah.

- [Omar] Mine-

- These are unarmed strikes,
for what it's worth.

- 18 was my AC.

- Okay.

So you know what you gotta beat.

- An eight.

(group laughing)

- Did you just assault BINX?

(group laughing)

- Did Rue just hit BINX?

- Rue just took a swing at BINX.

(group laughing)

- That's crazy, because BINX is wow.

- Wow, this ball is off to a great start.

(group laughing)

- Oh, I do hope we have some death.

(group laughing)

- We'll swing it.

- I'm like, oh no, oh,
there was an insect.

- [Emily] Yeah!

- There's an insect on her shoulder.

- Wafted up the skirt, it
can be very pleasurable.

(group laughing)
- [Aabria] We love a fly.

- The game is afoot.

- Oh, I also don't get it done.

(group laughing)
- [Aabria] Really?


- Are we fighting?

I'm gonna punch the dude next to me.

- This giant bugbear and owlbear

both like take these much smaller fairies

and are like, "Go get 'em!"

No, overshot, like.

- I'm so sorry.

If you are offended by my
turning down the Viscountess, I-

- No, no, no.

I thought I was doing something.

I wasn't doing anything.

- Okay.

- Please, do, do, do.

And the dance is,
(hands clapping)

strike up the band!

- BINX is in the middle of the dance floor

and she only knows a couple of dances.

And so she's gonna try to
attempt solo the cha cha slide.

(Oscar laughing)

And so she screams,
"Everybody, clap your hands!"

(hands clapping)
(violin music)

And then she starts.

(violin music)
(Aabria laughing)

- Uh, it's beautiful.

- I'm gonna need a persuasion
check with disadvantage.

- Can I have my African Grays,

which have a language
of 800 to 1.000 words,

can I just have them fly about,

twittering, "Beautiful!


(group laughing)



- Okay, I'll cancel the disadvantage.

- "Unexpected!"

- Unexpected!
(Aabria laughing)

It's so good.
(group laughing)

- Persuasion, oh, 25.

- Okay.

People are slow to like pick up your vibe.

The birds, for sure, help.

And they're like, "Yeah,
that sounds like a,

"I'm not gonna look up,
that would be crazy.

"But, yeah, if other people
think that this is great-"

- [Emily] Yeah.
- I think it's great.

And slowly get into it
and are clapping along.

And after like the first 30
seconds of the cha cha slide,

they join you.
(group laughing)

- It seems like an
incredibly simple dance.

We could do it.

It seems to be one to the left.

- Uh huh.
- We take it back now, y'all.

(group laughing)
- Yeah!

- Now one hop this time.

Okay, one more hop this time.

- Okay.

- Slide to the right.

Slide to the left.

- I wish all dances came with
instructions in the lyrics.

- Everybody clap your hands

(hands clapping)

in sixteenths.

(hands clapping)

- Amazing.

And it has begun sort of proper.

So now that the floor has been opened,

beyond this first sort of
dance, you are released.

You can stay dancing.

You can go find friends
and have conversation,

but I'll sort of open it up to the group.

What's everyone's
priorities in this moment?

- I beeline my way
towards Lady Featherfowl.

(Emily gasping)

Are you amongst a lot of
people at this moment in time?

- Just a lot of birds.

(group laughing)

I am on an ostrich being carried by-

- [Aabria] Are you on an ostrich?

- Doves.

(group laughing)

Oh actually, I don't have
Flock of Familiars for doves,

so just the ostrich with a
bunch of African Grays on my arm

who are smoking cigars.

They've developed a taste
for it, you naughty babies.

- Lady Featherfowl?

- Ah, Rue.

- Hello.
- [Emily] Hi.

- I-
- Are you

enjoying the party so far?

I thought the group dance was inspired.

- Oh, yeah, well that
had nothing to do with me

and everything to do
with the wonderful BINX.

- The Lady BINX, yes.

- [Oscar] Yes, absolutely.

- She's quite the charmer.

- And I did notice the
birds that you sent along

to help the situation.

So thank you for that.

- Ah, yes, of course.

Well, they can speak 800 to 1.000 words.

(group laughing)

- These smoking parrots?

(group laughing)

- Well, if they smoke too much,

they might not be able to anymore.

(group laughing)

- Lady Featherfowl,

I must say that I apologize for my delay

in getting back to you.
- Ah,

the salt Goblins that I sent to
you with the illusory script.

Yes, don't worry.

I figured it all out.

- Oh?

- I was in need of a question
relating to the wager

and I figured it all out.

- I have to apologize.

The wager was a moment.

I seem to have forgotten all about it.

It's been a very wild Bloom
for me, personally, but-

- Yes, yes.

I've enjoyed seeing you take a
little more time to yourself.

- [Oscar] Thank you.

- I hope that's coming from a good place?

- Yes, it is.

- [Emily] Good.
- Thank you.

And, again, for the Archfey
for just seeing me for who I am

truly means a lot.

But I did want to ask you, I was curious-

- Oh, yes, I-

- And I speak to you as a
friend. How is your adventures in

(string music)
finding love?

Has that been fruitful?
- You know,

I do find myself in love.

It's hard for a bird to fall,

(Emily chuckling)

'cause we have wings,
(group laughing)

but I do.

So in terms of falling in love,

but I do find myself
in love, so thank you.

- So the wager has been met?

- The wager?

Uh, the wager?

- Is it love?

- I do feel love in my heart.

- Is it reciprocated?

- It is reciprocated.

- Was there any aid of magic at all?

- No, there was not.

It was quite an unexpected
love that I did not expect.

- And then breaking any sort
of like traditional to-dos,

I like rush over to Featherfowl
and I give her a big hug.

- Thank you, wow.

- [Oscar] I'm so proud of you.

- But I'm so proud of you.

And what for you?

I mean, if this is the last Bloom,

I know that you have turned down,

I've heard the rumors you've
turned down so many proposals.

- Oh.

- Is there any consideration in you

that, being the last Bloom,

that you might indulge yourself

in something you've
previously denied yourself?

- Oh, it's not about denial.

There's just so much to do at the Bloom.

The Bloom isn't about me.

I guess-
- [Emily] Well-

- It became about me.

(group laughing)

- I think anytime it's about
you, it has been delightful.

- [Oscar] Mm-hmm.

- That dramatic duel was fantastic.

- Yes, about that.

I'm remembering that the
formal duel sent by birds

was written out that it was
Hob against Rue's assistant.

- Right.

Okay, we're dredging that up.

(group laughing)

- A champagne flute is
placed in your hand.

- You know, I'm gonna
go ahead and Gift of Gab

so Rue doesn't remember that.

(group laughing)

Cheers to such a successful Bloom so far.

- Cheers to a successful Bloom

and a successful love match as well.

Now what about your cousin?

I see you being very proactive in your aid

to try to get him a love match as well.

- Yes.

My cousin is doing fantastically.

Can I look over and see
what Squak is doing?

- Who has the best
drugs at the masquerade?

Which court is known for
having the best stuff?

- Ooh, best stuff?

Gotta be, weirdly, Goblin Court.

- Then I'm probably over with
Lord Boil and Lady Blemish.

- Ooh.
- [Emily] Ooh.

- Yeah.

Blemish and Boil.

You like, yeah, that's all good.

You kind of rock up to them

and they're in the middle of
sending people back and forth.

Go ahead and give me, really
quickly, perception check.

See what you can overhear
as it's happening.

- An 11.
(Brennan laughing)

- That's when you roll the die you gave me

(Emily laughing)

and I got a three.

(Emily laughing)
- Okay.

- You hear, just as they sort of are

reaching the end of a conversation,

they're like, "Good, a match,
we understand one another."

And a Seelie Court low-tier

fairy that looks like a little, tiny fairy

zips off in a direction.

- Low-tier fairy?

- Yeah, just like a tiny, little-

- [Lou] Like lowborn?

- Uh-

- Polymorph.
(Omar laughing)

- What do you turn?

I mean, I'm gonna roll the,

natural five's not gonna do it.

(group laughing)
What are they now?

- Like a little beetle.

(Emily laughing)
- [Brennan] A beetle!

- They drop out of the sky,

hit the ground and start crawling.

- I pick them up.

A friend of yours?

- Uh, hi,

yeah, that's-

- Sorry, I'll turn them back into a fairy.

- Fairy's like,

"Honestly, that was pretty good."

- Not bad.
- All right.

Just I guess backstroke, floats away.

(group laughing)

It goes and delivers the message.

- Oh, what can I say?

I'm out again having a bit of
fun, but so good to see you.

- It's so good to see you.

What can we do for you?

- Oh, well, you know,
I'm trying to get back to

a little bit of that old-Bloom feel

and was wondering if
you had any accessories

that might make this
evening a bit more engaging.

- Party favors?

- Party favors.

- Yeah, we got party favors, hold on.

And you see they like start
conferring with one another.

And I'll sort of offer,
without an insight check,

they seem incredibly like
relieved and pleased.

And you're seeing someone who's like,

business is done, it's time to party.

- [Lou] Mm.

- And what they actually
hand off is just a full mask.

- Oh, fantastic!
(group cheering)

- Oh no!

Somebody grab it!

- Fantastic.

- And they're like, "Put it on.

"Leave it on."

- Great.

- [Aabria] "For like a good minute."

- Okay.

- [Aabria] And the effect will hit.

- Great.

I throw it on.

- I love that you actually
put it on. That's amazing.

- [Lou] It seems to be-

- I mean, once Brennan ate a feather.

- Yeah, exactly.

- Ooh, yeah, I forgot about that.

- That was a high point.

- I throw it on, go,

"Now this feels like fun."

- All right, all right.

I'm only wearing a half mask, so,

(Omar laughing)

but you're-
- Most people do half masks?

- Well, I'm small.

- Yes.

- [Aabria] I get it.

- You know, I have a tolerance.

- And you're actually
watching in real time,

you can see in Blemish's eyes,

just the active dilating of
pupils as the beat drops.

And they're like.

- Oh, I'm going to find
you on the dance floor.

- Yes.


(Aabria shouting)

(group laughing)

And then sort of like these two Goblins

that were sort of known for
having like court decorum,

as the drugs sort of wash over them,

fall into their favorite
version of celebration,

which is inherently chaotic.

They're kind of like shouting
out, like pointing at you

and just kicking people's
glasses out of their hands

and just beginning to literally tear up

part of the dance floor.

- Right, I think I join them.

- I think I see all this and I'm like,

"Ah, my cousin.

"He's doing exactly
what I should be doing.

"I do hope that I'm able to maintain

"the decorum you require this party."

And then I go to do drugs.
(group laughing)

- Before you go, Lady Featherfowl?

- [Emily] Yes, yeah?

- May I ask you question?

- Oh, absolutely.

- It seems that you and
your cousin, Lord Airavis,

are the life of the party.

(Emily laughing)
- Oh, yes.

- And I'm realizing,

maybe for the first time
in a million Blooms,

that maybe we do need to
embrace a bit of the chaos.

- Mm.


- If you were to run the Bloom-

- Mm-hmm.

- Hypothetically speaking,

what would be the most essential thing?

- Mm, I think the most essential thing

would be trying to create an environment

in which everyone felt
inspired to take a risk

and go after whatever the
fuck they want that night.

- My eyes dart straight
to Hob as she says that.

- Come on!

You give me, look, Emily.

- [Emily] Yeah?

- I'm talking to you as Aabria.

- Mm-hmm.

- Who needs this to happen, please.

I need a perception check.

You have to clock.

Insight, perception, whatever.

I need you to clock this.

I need it, please.


- Mm, okay.

I plus zero to perception.

(group laughing)

And I rolled a seven.

(group laughing)

Oh, but my insight is
plus three, I rolled a 10.

(Emily laughing)

- So much inspiration, though.

You have over 20 points of inspiration.

- I don't think I've
gotten it this episode.

And I did just use an inspiration before.

- Yeah, your eyes sort
of follow Rue's eyeline

and then just there's a wall of people,

so you're not quite sure
what they're looking at.

It's fine and I'm not upset about it.

- I give Rue another hug and
I just say, "You need to be,

"I know that you are
the host all the time,

"and, you know, Lord Squak
and I, we were talking,

"oh, well we should host a party

"so that Rue can come be a guest.

"But with Wuvvy around,

"I think you can let yourself
be a guest for a night."

- Wuvvy does a lot of the
work. I do understand that.

- No, no, no, in a good way.

- No, no, of course.

- [Emily] In a good way.
- Yes, yes, yes.

- You've earned one night
of getting to be a guest.

- Well, I think I might. Thank you, Lady.

And congratulations on winning your wager.

- Thanks.

I was gonna give you a
supportive slap on the ass,

but now I'm realizing I
should ask for consent

before I do that.

- Oh, I consent.

- Okay!
(group laughing)

All right.

- As you give that graceful little pat,

give me a perception check.

I'll give you advantage
as your parrot begins to,

I almost said bark, but
that doesn't feel right.

(group laughing)

- Okay, well-

- [Aabria] It's been a long day.

- I got a five and three.
- Oh no. (group laughing)

- It's okay.

- My birds, they actually can speak,

I don't know if I've mentioned this-

- [Aabria] Oh, sorry.

- 800 to 1.000 words.
- To 1.000 words.

- [Emily] To 1.000 words.

- [Aabria] Do you think they would know-

- They might know the word bark.

- Yeah.
- So they could just say bark.

- Thank you.
- Yeah.

- Do you think they would
know the word grandfather?

(group gasping)
- Oh.

- Ab-so-fucking-lutely,
because we've said it so much.

- Well, they're saying
it now under their breath

and looking off into the
distance, across the ball.

- Cousin!

(group laughing)

- I'm gonna walk up to my
cousin, crack the mask in half,

and push half of it onto Chirp's face.

(Emily laughing)

You gotta try this.

- Okay, Cousin, but grandfather's coming.

Grandfather's coming.

Grandfather's coming.

- Oh, great!

- Give me a perception check.

(group laughing)

- Oh, no.

- 19 plus six for 25.

- Super fun.


Grandpa is absolutely here,
(Emily shouting)

watching you both across the dance floor.

- Oh no.

- Cousin, I so desperately
wanted to do drugs.

Wait, I'm doing them right now.

- [Lou] Well, we are doing-
- This mask is drugs?

- The mask is drugs!

(Emily giggling)

We should go.

We should go talk to him.
- We should talk to him.

Put on your game face.

- Let's do it.
(Lou gasping)

(group laughing)
(hands clapping)

And I think each wear half a mask.

We're gonna go talk to Grandfather.

(group laughing)

Oh, and as we walk over,

I put a reassuring hand
on Chirp's shoulder

and go, "We got this.

"We've been drunker

"in even more important
situations before."

- That's totally right.

I love it.

- And I'm gonna cast
Intellect Fortress on them.

- Ooh!

- As we go and to talk to Grandfather,

whenever that happened.

- Amazing.

You make your way over to your grandfather

who is standing in just
sort of an ivory suit

with a cape that's encrusted with amethyst

at the shoulder and down the breast.

But his skin looks sort of

sallow and grayish by comparison.

He's got like a little
snood hanging over of skin.

Look, he's the worst part of birds,

and that's basically everything,
you know, on a turkey,

he's rocking,

'cause they're a yucky bird.

- [Lou] Yeah.

- And he's just sort of standing there.

- Is he drinking something?

- He actually has a
stemless flute in his hand.

And you see as his hand
kind of goes over it,

it goes from like a
transparent, thin glass

and frosts over in gold,

so you can't see what's inside of it.

- Grandfather, this is the
climax to which you referred?

- Mm-hmm.

- It is so good to see you.

- [Emily] It's so good to see you.

- I'll bow low.

- He gives a little bow back.

- Ah, I think that you'll find that

we've negotiated two fantastic matches

and you can witness us
being next to them tonight.

(Oscar laughing)
- Yes, we can play a fun game

where we'll go stand next to them.

(group laughing)

As it hasn't been, Grandfather,

as you know, things are
courtly and it's all delicate.

- It's all delicate,

so it's not set in stone right now-

- [Lou] Yes.
- To borrow the phrase

from the Stone Court.

(group laughing)

Ah, I made Grandfather laugh.

Okay, um, so, but you know,

you can kind of witness
the very beginnings.

- Show me.

- Okay.

I look for Suntar and I point at her.

(group laughing)

- Really?

- It is in the works.

- I'm going to point at both
the Baroness and Apollo.

Do you have a preference?

(group laughing)

- God, what is the flex check on that?

Just gimme just a raw charisma roll.

- [Lou] Okay.

- That's wild.

- Nat 20, please.

- No, only a 10.

I'll burn a point of inspiration.

- [Aabria] Yeah.

- That I like better.

We'll do 23.

- You wouldn't be lying to
your grandfather, would you?

- You might eat us if we did.

- We know that you eat your young.

- Hm.

I'm impressed.

And if you're asking,
Prince Apollo, obviously.

- Yes, yes.

- Okay.

- Good, great.

- Great.

- I would love to continue this,

but even I have plans here tonight.

- [Emily] Oh.

- Oh.

- What are your plans, Grandfather?

- Don't ask questions you
don't want the answer to.

(Brennan gasping)

You got this honest.

- Grandfather, you seem
to be a bit underdressed.

- [Emily] Yeah.
- You're lacking a mask.

(group laughing)

- No!

(group laughing)
(hands clapping)

- Yes, Grandfather!

Go ahead and try it on.

- Grandfather, throw that on there.

- Huh?

You gotta give a me persuasion check.

- [Oscar] Oh God, yes.

- With advantage, 'cause
you're both doing it.

- Great.

Oh, first one is a 10 for 21.

- Oh.

- Second one

(string music)

is a 14 for 25.

- Here, I'll hold your drink
while you put the mask on.

- He hands off the drink.

- And I'll dump a love potion into it.

- [Oscar] Stop!
- Yes!

(group laughing)

- Wow!
- Stop it, stop it!

- Yes!
(group laughing)

(hands clapping)

Look that's dope.

I'm not making you roll for it.

- [Oscar] Yes!

- The mask goes on.

You watch his beady, terrible eyes dilate.

And then he takes a swig of his drink

and like swivels around.

I have to make this one of your problem.

(Emily laughing)

Have to.

- God, I'll make a Dexterity check.

I'll make a stealth roll,
whatever you need me to do.

- [All] Grabalba!






- Oh my God, what if-
- Can we clock this?

Can I huck Grabalba right at Grandfather?

- Throw her!

Grandfather's eye line slides and slides

in a direction.

He goes, "I actually I have to go see.

(intense string music)


- Okay.
- [Lou] Of course.

- Okay, Grandfather, of course.

Of course.
- And as he pushes past you,

very excitedly moving in the direction of

some members of the Sea Foam Court,

he says, "Brunch tomorrow."

- Oh, right.

Brunch with Grandfather.

- Okay.

- And moves through.

And you all suddenly
hear like a thunderclap,

a loud bang,

and the illusory walls around
you begin to fall away,

starting from the ground and moving up

until the ceiling is gone
and you see the sky overhead.

(group oohing)
(fireworks exploding)

As a beautiful fireworks show
(hands clapping)


and very much in the way that

Lady Chirp mentioned

this added darkness, this
openness, this transformation to

just the cover of night

and everything that happens under a sky,

inhibitions are lost,

and the Fey truly have moments

under booms and sighs and
ahhs to be themselves.

And very much in the
manner of the Hedge Maze,

I wanna ask you all one more time

under the cover of darkness
with flashes of light,

where do each of you move?

You have one more moment
here at the masquerade.

Captain Hob?

- We have one more
moment in the masquerade

before the night descends
and the fireworks begin?

- [Aabria] Mm-hmm.

- Does this mean that we
have one more moment of

feeling ourselves as we
did when masked and formal?

- I think it's sort of in
that like transition period,

as things move from like one
phase to the next, everyone,

like there's this sudden surge of motion

as people sort of realign their efforts

and you see people like
scampering into the woods

and disappearing into the darkness.

So what do you do in
this moment of transition

as the masquerade falls away?

- Oscar, you wanna call odds or evens?

- I'm gonna say odds.

- Never been happier to roll a nat one.

(Emily laughing)
- [Aabria] Ooh!

- You rolled a nat one?

- I watched it!

- I rolled a nat one.
(Omar laughing)

Hob has been eyeing Apollo all night,

preparing for the moment
to reach out and strike,

to begin this duel.

And I think he's also been
looking at the Lords of the Wing,

thinking to himself, "I'm going to give

"the Lord of Peckersberg
and the Lady of Cluckingham

"exactly what they want,
which is some action."

And the first (fireworks
exploding) goes off in the air,

the first loud noise.

And I think there's just
enough of a gasp of people

that were not expecting this,

a little bit of startledness
and a little bit of surprise

that Hob has always looked
at his core and said,

"Well, I'm a Goblin.

"I'm ferocious, I'm terrifying.

"Whatever my impulses
are, they're most feral."

And in that moment of loud
noise and a frightened gasp,

the impulse that comes to Hob most

in a moment that surprises him, too,

and makes him a little bit afraid,

is he bounds with his mighty arms,

leaps over a group to quickly
surround Rue with his arms

because he's worried for
a moment for their safety.

- Ooh.

- Ooh.

- I do apologize for
laying hands upon you,

Master of Ceremonies.

The noise, I worried that
we were under attack.

Loud noises, as a military man, I believe-

- Where do you grab me?

- I stand behind you and grab
you on the middle of your arms

between your elbow and your shoulder.

- So I look down at your arms

and they're beautifully
covered by these white gloves

and then the claws coming out.

And I look at my own brown, furry claws,

with similar claws to yours.

- Mm-hmm.

- And I have never felt
more appreciative of,

because, you know,

I would have normally put
on a glamor to this event,

but seeing my claws
and his claws together,

I realize that I am not alone.

(soft string music)

I'm not the only one.

And I tense up for a minute
and then I regain my composure

and I just politely brush you off,

turn around to look at you.

Oh, I, Captain Hob, thank you so much for,

but it was just the
magnificence of the fireworks

that truly startled me.

I'm quite fine.

- Oh no, I understand.

They startled me as well.

My action was not a reflection
on your startlement,

but my own.

You look resplendent.

- I was going to say the exact same thing.

You look divine.

- As full as I am sure
your dance card must be,

sorry, no, I meant only to mention your,

I'm sure you must be
being bothered by everyone

asking you to dance.

- Captain Hob, look around you.


- Do I look at your dance card
and not see any names on it?

- Mm-hmm.

- Might I have the honor
of transcribing my name

upon your card?

- That would please me greatly.

- Oh.

- There have been many
instances that led me to believe

that here amongst these Fey,

I might at times have
been surrounded by fools.

Seeing that I have beat them all

to the most desirable card in the room,

I've never been more certain.

And I write my name on
your dance card and I bow.

- Now let's take a look
at your dance card.

- Oh, (Brennan laughing)
somewhat empty as well.

- Well, may I?

(soft string music)

And then I start to write
my name on your dance card.

If the Archfey at this ball are blind,

they are also foolish

for not seeing the true
magnificence of a gentleman

amongst gentlemen tonight.

(soft string music)

- I look at my card.

I fold it, meet your gaze and I eat it.

(hands clapping)
(group laughing)

- And we move from that

(Brennan laughing)

to BINX.

What do you do in this moment?

- So in this moment,

I feel like BINX is not used
to the glitz and the glam

and the opulence of moments like this.

And so, naturally, she is
kind of drawn to the shadows

and to darker corners.

And so I think for a large
majority of the dance,

she's just been chatting with you.

- Mm-hmm.

- And just talking about everything.

And then gives Andhera,

tries to split a black
apple with them and says,

"Have you tried these yet?

"They're amazing."

- No.

My dog had one of those the other day.

I was so-

(Oscar laughing)

- Wait, your dog ate-

- No, the dog just was around them.

- Oh.

Uh, try it.

- And I take a bite of the half apple.

- Okay.
(soft music)

Imbued in this apple are memories.

They're memories of the Mortal Realm.

You feel like you are by a fire

and there are people laughing
and telling jokes around you.

You feel warm and comforted
by this group of found family

and it feels like a warm, cozy blanket

upon your heart.

And that is a memory.

And you see like the
other Court of Crafts,

there's different

shapes and sizes.

They all look sort of like they
themselves are found objects

and you just experience
it like you're there.

(soft music)

- My happiness up until this point

has been like striking a piece
of flint in the darkness,

little bits of spark which
I was very grateful for.

This is a fire.

Thank you.

Would you accompany me
to a quick conversation?

- Sure, I would love to.

- [Omar] And I hold out my arm.

- And I take his arm.

- I do grab a drink from a tray

and I do 100% cast Detect Magic on it.

- Mm-hmm.

- Yes, that one's absolutely spiked

with one of the vials from earlier.

(group laughing)

Not gonna tell you which one.

And you're kind of looking
around with your Detect Magic

at this tray.

This was not an original idea
from the Lords of the Wing.

They made it good and like
okay for people to do,

and now anyone that was still
holding from the tea party

is like, (group laughing)

"Let's go."

- And I just place it back on the tray.

You know what?

Let's just go.

- Oh, sure, yeah.

- Safe choice.
(group laughing)

- We don't fuck with that.

And together we head over
to the Lords of the Wing.

- Oh.

- Oh.

- Ooh, hi.

We were trying to set our
grandfather up with a match.

- Yes.
(Brennan laughing)

- Just having a bit of fun.

- Just having a bit of fun. Hi.

- Well.

- How are you, young Andhera?

Lady BINX?
- [Lou] Lady BINX.

- We've never met-
- [Lou] Yes.

- But we've been watching
you from the window,

admiring your fashion.

- Very much enjoyed your dancing.

- [Emily] Yes, loved your dancing.

- Very delightful, very easy.

- Yes.
- [Emily] Yes, yes.

- Mm-hmm.

Yeah, you are very mature
and you are very hospitable.

- We're also on drugs right now.

- [Lou] Yes.
(group laughing)

- Cool, so we can just like hang then?

- [Emily] Yeah.
- Yes.

- All right, awesome.

- [Emily] Yeah.

- We will not take up
too much of your time.

- No.

- I just really quickly want to say,

at the heart of all your activities,

as I've seen from the many Blooms before-

- Mm-hmm.

- Is a pure joy.

And having experienced

what BINX has shared with me just now,

the Material Plane has so much joy there

that's worth protecting
and enjoying and ensuring,

as I'm sure there's many
elements of the Material Plane

that we should make sure
that magic flows to there.

- I'm sorry?
- Mm-hmm?

- Why are you talking to me
about the Material Plane?

- Well, I'm talking to both of
you because you're both fun.

- Okay.

So fun.

- So fun.

- Yes, I do agree.

I do agree that the Material Plane is

an amazing place to summer.

- It seems that there's
some workings going on

and I'm not quite sure I've
put all the pieces together.

- Mm-hmm?

- But clearly magic is being endangered.

- Oh, we are trusting now.

(Brennan laughing)

(ominous music)

Yeah, so I'm the only one,

because of this spillage of magic.

And we feel there might be

people here

that might have something to
do with said loss of magic.

And it would be great if
maybe we, people who like to,

looks at you,

frequent the Material Plane,

would want to make sure the
doors are open for travel.

- What type of-

- Hold on.

- Oh.

- I need you to make a
history check for me.

- [Omar] Oh.

- With advantage.

- Hi, yeah, yeah.

That's a three.

Hi, yeah, yeah.

That's a 15.

- Aye, aye, aye.

- That comes to 22.

- Yeah.
(hands clapping)

- [Lou] Aye, aye, aye.
- There's no universe in which

you didn't make that
realization that like,

even if you don't know
the Gwyn-BINX situation,

the only person you got
caught slipping around

and mentioning the Material Plane

was to Gwyndolin Thistle-Hop.

- Mm-hmm.
- Ooh, baby.

- Ooh!
- Oh, shit!

- Lady Gwyndolin, you've come
to collect on information

I may have imparted to you?

- What's happening?

(group laughing)

- [Emily] Okay.

- No, no, no, we have to
end there. That was dope.

(group cheering)

- Yes!

- Yeah!

- Ugh, that's so cool.

Okay, I'm excited and there's
things moving on the walls.

So thank you so much for joining us

for the magical masquerade
episode and our chapter

and we'll return soon with
chapter eight of ACOFAF,

"A Court of Fey & Flowers."

(group laughing)

- Wow.

- [All] Yeah!

- I am going to start a rumor.

- Yes.

- That Prince Andhera-

- Ooh.

- Of the Unseelie Court
has found his match.

(group gasping)

- Dear Lady Featherfowl,

I apologize for my overly blunt response

into being thrust into the spotlight.

Also my sheer panic when you asked

if I was calling in the favor

and for the fog cloud and magic missile

I then deployed as I fled.

- Oh, honey, I would've
counter-spelled them.

- This business of there
not being any further Blooms

was not some environmental,
nebulous, magical reality,

but maybe an act on a
court that some are saying

is greedy for magic

that rightly belongs to
more than just themselves.

(intense string music)
- I need a nap after that one.

- That was very good.

(Emily laughing)

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