Diagnosis Murder (1993–2001): Season 3, Episode 11 - Murder Murder - full transcript

At a party where he gave his younger wife Jennifer a black Viper sports car, Bill Stratton is called away to the office; someone had intruded there, waiting with the fatal gun. At Bill's cremation, Steven remarks street thug who 'moved up' to sweat-shops with illegal immigrants Stan Macky and Lenore, the angrily estranged daughter from Bill's first marriage. Shady Alan Helms, in debt and a nasty divorce, said he was only one of many business friends who were cut off by Bill after his marriage to Jennifer, who claims Helms recently came ask for another loan. Norman asks Mark's piano-accompaniment to rehearse for the modern major-general's part in a community theater production of The Pirates of Penzance, but shows neither talent nor memory anywhere near the Gilbert and Sullivan requirements and no patience at all. Widow Jennifer recently bought a gun which she 'now notices is gone' and says Stan was a client of Bill; she inherits everything, Lenore nothing, since a will change only a month ago. Jennifer's alibi is her identical twin sister Joan, but Chinese delivery man Al Cho saw the Viper, either could have killed Bill. Jennifer's fingerprints are on both dumped murder gun and last will. Steve and Jesse find Jennifer's corps in the fatally Viper-fumed closed garage with a hand-written suicide note and confession. The autopsy doesn't fit, but the list of suspects with motive and opportunity shortens fast, except for Jennifer's heir, or maybe not quite as it appears...

Well, now that a
year has gone by,

I'm not afraid to admit
I was scared to death.

You seem to have
gotten past that, all right.

You just can't stop
grinning, can you?

Well, it's about time I
got it right, don't you think?

I mean, number four?

In fact, Mark, promise
not to laugh at this, okay?

I won't laugh.

We are thinking about...

Hell, we are trying
to start a family.

Oh, Bill, that's wonderful.



Wait till you see what I
got her for our anniversary.

Jennifer... Where is
she? Jennifer! Oh...

Thought you deserted me.

Oh, no way.

Mark, we don't see
enough of you around here.

Jennifer, listen, if you do
things like this all the time,

I might just rent
your guesthouse.

Everybody!

Over here! Over here!

I want to thank you all

for being here on this
wonderful anniversary

of the smartest decision I ever
had the good sense to make.

Now... present time.

Okay.



Ooh! Ahh!

What am I hearing? Bill?

Ta-da!

I don't believe it.

Oh, my God. Oh. It's gorgeous!

A Viper? Yeah.

How do I get on
your Christmas list?

She likes to tinker.
Who? Jennifer?

Yeah. She loves engines,
and she's good at it, too.

We were stuck someplace

in a terrible little village
in the middle of Turkey

with this rented piece
of junk, and it dies,

and she repairs the
engine right there.

Phone for you, sir.

Oh. Excuse me.

Oh.

Yeah, what is it?

All right, calm down. Calm down.

I'll be there. Just relax.

I'll take care of it.

Tonight, 9:00, in my office.

Problem?

Oh, I've got a minor emergency.

I've got to go into
the office tonight.

I love you, Bill Stratton.

Thank you.

Mmm. Thank you.

Hello?

Is somebody in here?

How did you get past Security?

Jennifer has reminded me

of a favorite
passage of Bill's...

A passage from which he
always drew great strength.

"Bring back to my remembrance
the glory I had with thee

"before this world began.

"He giveth power to the faint,
and to them that have no might

"he increaseth strength.

"They that wait upon the Lord

"shall renew their strength.

"They shall mount up
with wings as eagles.

"they shall run
and not be weary,

and they shall
walk and not faint."

Amen.

Amen.

How you doing, Dad?

I'm fine. Well,
you're a surprise.

Well, not everybody
that shows up

at a funeral comes to grieve.

I'm working.

Is that who I think it is?

Yeah. It's Bill. It's his ashes.

I was just supposed to
hold them for a second.

Any leads? Well, not much.

We know the caliber
of gun that was used.

We'll run the usual
registration check

on anybody who was
connected with Stratton.

I don't want any excuses.
Get it out of there,

all right? No loose ends.

Doesn't look like he's here
for a tearful farewell, either.

I don't think he'd give his
own mother a tearful farewell.

His name is Stan Macky.

He's a street thug who moved up.

His specialty is
running illegal aliens

and using them as
slave labor in sweatshops.

How does a man like
that get to know Bill?

It might be
interesting to find out.

Do you have any idea
who the bad suit is?

That, if you can believe
it, is Bill's old law partner.

And they had a nasty split.

Looks like he was
born to wear polyester.

I'm surprised to see him
here, to tell you the truth.

Since you know
almost everyone here,

tell me who the dry-eyed
woman in black is.

That's Lenore, Bill's
daughter by his first marriage.

He didn't talk much about her.

Another nasty split?

I don't know.

You know, Amanda's
got some time next week.

It might be a good idea
to have her look into it.

I'd appreciate that.

Any of Jennifer's family here?

Uh... she's got one
sister, I think, someplace.

Don't tell me.
She hated Bill, too.

I don't know that
much about her.

Just an idea I had

based on most
everyone else here.

It's the angriest
funeral I've ever seen.

You know, maybe we should
check out the sister, too.

Not a bad idea. All right.

Let me know what you dig up.

Yeah. You, too.

Father, would you...?

Oh, of course.

Bless you, Father.

Mr. Helms? Steve
Sloan, Homicide.

I need to ask you
a few questions.

I didn't think you'd get
around to me this fast.

I am flattered.

I saw you sizing up the funeral.

I understand you weren't
too happy with Stratton

over the partnership split.

Split?

You mean like we
agreed to part company?

Split? Just two
gentlemen deciding

to end a nice little
business arrangement?

Boy, did she see you coming.

She?

Yeah. She.

Yeah. This is Helms.

Well, you keep the back
brace on all the time.

What are you doing going
out in public for anyway?

Listen, you have a brain
concussion, a slipped disc

and possible whiplash.

You want to see a
movie, get pay-per-view.

Dumbass.

Guy gets rear-ended by a bus.

He can't even stay in bed

a couple of months.

Nice office you have here.

Yeah. And I got
a lot of work to do,

so let's just get
our nice little chat

out of the way, shall we?

Tell me about "she."

You know damn well
who I'm talking about.

The child bride.

I worked with
Stratton for 15 years.

I screwed up

a couple of times, but
Bill always believed in me.

That is, until the
lovely Miss Jennifer

whispered in his
ear a couple of times.

And then I'm out the door.

Mrs. Stratton had
Bill get rid of you?

Me and many others, believe me.

She made a clean

sweep of all the old friends

before those wedding
bells rang, I'll tell you.

Hell, he didn't
just get married.

He got lobotomized.

Well, the reports were that
he was a very happy man.

He probably was.

He paid enough for it.

She turned him
into a real bastard.

You know that?

If you hated him so much,
why did you go to the funeral?

I take my pleasure
where I find it.

Besides, you never know.

I may run into an
old client or two

who's just fresh
out of a lawyer.

Uh... Mr. Helms, I'm
afraid we're not quite done.

Yeah, we are, cop.

Helms, look, I'm not having

a real good time
here either, okay?

You want me to go away,
why don't you just tell me

where you were the
night Stratton was killed.

The ballet.

Or was it the opera?

Go away, and don't come back

until you've got something
to charge me with.

You know, Helms, I really
hope you are clean on this.

Oh, yeah? Mm-hmm.

So I never have
to see you again.

Lenore has a little coffee
shop out in the valley.

Oh. I'll check it out.

I think Mark wants
me to handle it.

I don't think so, Amanda.

You're pregnant, and you
need to stay off your feet.

You know, for a
bright young doctor,

you don't have a clue about
healthy, pregnant women.

I am pregnant, not sick,

and I'll take care of it.

Hey, what can I do?

Go away. I want to
talk to Mark alone. Now.

Yes, sir.

What is it, Norman?

Nothing. I need a favor.

What? Beneath this coat and tie,

the Master's degree in
administration from Yale,

and the calculator,
lies a high baritone.

I'm auditioning for
the community theater.

You're kidding. What show?

Pirates of Penzance.

Oh, that's a wonderful one.

What part? The
General, of course.

The General. The General.

But I need a little rehearsing.

And, you know, since you're
such a good accompanist,

then I figured maybe that piano
thing you have in your den...

Sure. I'd be happy to.

Terrific. We'll
arrange a time later.

Okay. Thespians unite.

I can't wait. Me, neither.

My father wasn't a
parent. He was a CEO.

These are the people
who raised me...

Willa Cather, Dorothy Parker.

What about your mother?

Well, there wasn't
much left of her

after he moved on to wife
number two, then three.

You know, the day
that your father died,

your name was in
his appointment book.

Well, how convenient.

I wonder who could
have done that?

Made sure everybody
knew I was with him?

Mommy Dearest, maybe?

God, I'm two years
younger than she is.

Oh, dear. Have I gotten into
some wicked stepmother stuff?

No. Not really.

I don't have a
problem with Jennifer.

At least she's obvious.

She was taking my father for
a ride, and everybody knew it.

Was the fight with your
father about money?

Is that what she told you?

No. Uh... no. It
wasn't about money.

Well, what was it about, if
you don't mind me asking?

Yeah. Uh... I didn't...
I didn't kill my father.

No, no, no. I'm sorry, Lenore.

It's just that Mark wants
to know what happened.

Now, the man may have
been a lousy father to you,

but he was somebody's friend.

Yeah, well, that man...
Dr. Sloan's friend...

Told me he wanted
to have more kids.

Mmm... I don't know.
Maybe he figured

he hadn't abandoned
enough children already.

When I got my driver's license,

I took my mother's car,

and I drove from our
house to his house.

37 minutes. That's all it took.

I couldn't believe
it. 37 minutes.

He never once came to see me.

Christmases. Birthdays.

Not once since I
was five years old.

This was the man who
wanted to have more children.

Well, I had no idea that Lenore

had grown so far
apart from her father.

Mm.

Even witnessing her anger,

I looked at all those
pictures with her,

all those women
that she idolized.

I don't know.

I just don't see
her as a killer.

No, but she is an
angry daughter.

Hey, when do we find out
who inherits the money?

Well, what's that
supposed to mean?

Come on.

Whoever inherits the
money inherits the guilt.

Can you be little
more creative, Jesse?

Amanda, we're talking

several million dollars here.

Several million motive dollars.

And not much due process.

Hey.

Hey.

What did you find
out about Helms?

Well, he's a mess.

A mess with an alibi?

Don't know yet,
but if he has one,

it's probably a bartender.

I turned up a short ugly bio.

Since his partnership
with Bill Stratton dissolved,

Mr. Helms has gotten
himself up to his neck in debt;

he's gone through
a nasty divorce;

racked up two DUIs
and an assault charge

against the guy who
owed him money.

You know, you could have
called me and told me that.

Yes, but I didn't because
something even more interesting

than the charming
Mr. Helms turned up.

Ten days before
Stratton was shot,

a .32-caliber Beretta was
purchased and registered

to Jennifer Stratton.

And I'll bet you she
inherits everything.

Well, that's worth looking into.

Let's go.

Why didn't you tell
us about the gun?

It never occurred to me.

What's wrong with the engine?

Nothing.

It's just the best
therapy I could think of.

It never occurred
to you to tell us

you bought a gun just ten
days before your husband...

Was killed?

What went on ten days before

was not exactly uppermost
in my mind at the time.

Would you like to
turn the engine over?

I thought you'd never ask.

I'd like to see the gun.

I'd like to see the...

Dad, would you cut it?

Would you like to see the gun?

Well, now that you've
brought it up, yes.

Bill insisted I buy the gun.

I didn't want it.

You know, I always
thought Bill hated guns.

Did he tell you why he
wanted you to have it?

Protection.

He was worried
about me being alone.

It's right through here.

Did you talk to Alan Helms?

I can't believe that...
clown had the nerve

to show up at Bill's funeral.

He said he hadn't seen
your husband in months.

He was just here a
couple weeks ago,

trying again to get
money out of Bill.

Did Bill give it to him?

Absolutely not.

Helms roared out of here.

Probably to get
back to his bottle.

It's not here.

Who else knew about the gun?

Uh... nobody, I don't think.

Uh... maybe Bill
took it with him.

Maybe he was afraid
there'd be trouble that night.

Mrs. Stratton, I
have to ask you this.

Where were you the
night Bill went to his office?

Here.

W-What are you saying?

It's all right, Jennifer.

Did anybody see you here?

A housekeeper? A servant?

How about a sister?

Hi. I'm Joan.

Mark, you're staring.

Yes, I'm...

I'm sorry.

You s-said, said you
had a sister, but I...

I'm sorry for staring.

Don't be. We're used to it.

Every time...

we're together,
people tend to stare.

It doesn't embarrass us,

so you shouldn't
let it bother you.

Like I said,

we're used to it by now.

Or at...

least we should be.

You really do that
twin-talking-back- and-forth thing.

Sometimes we just can't resist

doing that to people, sorry.

Uh, about the
night Bill was shot?

Uh, Jennifer called
me about 8:00

and said that Bill had to go

to the office on some
sort of emergency.

I didn't want to be alone.

I'd just rented a couple
videos and came on out.

How long did you stay?

All night. Why?

Am I a suspect?

No. You understand we
have to ask these questions.

Of course.

We ordered Chinese.

It got here about 10:00, 10:30.

You can check
with the restaurant.

Jennifer, let us know
if that gun turns up.

Of course.

Uh, one other thing.

Do you have any idea why
Stan Macky was at the funeral?

Stan Macky?

I think he was
a client of Bill's.

Stan Macky, a sweatshop boss,

was a client of your husband's?

I think.

You can double-check
with his office.

I'll do that.

What do you think?

Dead ringers.

I mean Stan Macky,

the missing gun, their alibi.

Worth looking into.

A lot of looking into.

Twins.

The delivery boy I want you
to talk to is named Al Cho.

Did you know that one-eighth

of all natural pregnancies
actually begins as twins?

Now, the owner of
the restaurant said

that Al was working the
night that Bill was killed.

Only, like, one out
of 80 or 90 births

actually produces twins.

It's called the "vanishing
twin" syndrome.

Now, I want you to ask him

who he delivered the food to

and what time
exactly he was there.

Now, identical twins that
have been reared apart

choosing the same majors in
college and the same careers?

I mean, this is mind-blowing.

Jesse?

Then you've got that...

I mean these are studies

that put a crimp in
that whole nature...

Jesse? Jesse? Al Cho.

Gesundheit.

No. I'm kidding.
I heard. I heard.

Bel Air. Alibi check. Al Cho.

Chinese food.

Geez, Doc, relax.

Stan Macky?

What's that doing there?

I always clean
Mr. Stratton's desk

and lock up the
client files every night.

Well, maybe you forgot this one.

I never forget.

Well, somebody left it out.

Boy, the Immigration Department

and the IRS would love
to get their hands on this.

That's privileged information.

Ah, it might also have
the killer's prints on it.

Who else had
access to these files?

Mr. Stratton, myself
and his wife Jennifer.

I think she also had a key.

What about his computer?

Whenever he entered
anything into his system,

it was automatically
transferred to mine.

Well, except for
personal things.

Like his will?

Yes.

I suppose you'd
like to see that, too.

If you don't mind.

That's odd.

He's changed his will.

His daughter
Lenore's been deleted.

"Sole beneficiary: my
beloved wife Jennifer Stratton."

This is dated a month
before he was killed.

Well, I'm not surprised.

Meaning?

Well, Mrs. Stratton thought that
Lenore was spoiled, ungrateful.

Thought she should make
it on her own financially.

Do you think Mrs. Stratton
had him change his will?

Knowing Mrs. Stratton...

I don't have a doubt.

The woman who opened
the door at the Stratton place,

what'd she look like?

In my delivery area,
they all look alike: rich.

Hmm, you think?

Um... blond hair, thin,
good-looking, and glasses.

Mm. This stuff is great.

Mm.

Here.

Free delivery. I accept tips.

Any other questions?

Are you sure it was
9:45 when you left there?

Well, I got back to
the shop about 10:00.

That's when my shift ends.

Hey, look, I've got to
get this stuff delivered.

Is there anything
else about that night

that you remember
anything odd or unusual?

Yeah, the car. It was amazing.

A black Viper. Right.

I was starting to leave,
and this woman drives up

in this thing and goes
to the back of the place.

What'd this woman look like?

Oh, I just saw her for a
second in the headlights.

I guess she kind of looked
like that woman at the door.

Okay?

Okay.

All right. I'm out of here.

Yeah. Thanks.

30 bucks for egg foo young?

Not including tip.

Okay, Norman, let's
try it with the music.

Want to start from the top?

Okay. One, two, three, four...

When do I come in?
When do I come in?

Come in anytime.

Just jump in there.

♪ I am the very major... ♪

♪ I am... ♪

♪ I am the very
model of a major ♪

♪ I am the very model of... ♪

Wait a minute.

Let's take it from
the top again.

Try and do it
twice as fast. Why?

Because that's the way it's
supposed to be performed.

Okay.

All right, and
loosen up a little bit.

Give it a little
movement, you know.

Okay.

That's what it needs.

♪ I am the very model of
a major modern general ♪

You've got to go faster.

I... I can't.

♪ I am the very model of
a modern major general ♪

♪ I'm information vegetable,
animal and mineral ♪

♪ I know the kings of England ♪

♪ And I quote the
fights historical ♪

♪ From Marathon to
Waterloo in order categorical ♪

I'm supposed to be doing that.

Well, just learn it like that.

Go ahead. What do you want?

I've got some news.

Okay. Practice a little bit.

That's the way you
should do it. That fast.

♪ I am the very
major of the... ♪

♪ I am the very modern... ♪

What'd you find out?

Uh... Be my guest. Okay.

The delivery guy said
that he saw a black Viper

pull up to the house
driven by someone

who looked a lot like Joan.

So Jennifer lied.

They both lied.

How long would it take
to get from Stratton's office

to his house at that time
of night, do you think?

45 minutes.

Well, I was in my car. I
thought I'd give it a shot.

So if it was Jennifer

the delivery guy
saw returning home...

Oh, we don't know that for sure.

Well, fine, but if it was,

she had time to
meet Bill at 9:00,

kill him and get back in time

for the delivery man
to see her return.

But why would
she want to kill Bill?

Money.

I went to Stratton's office

and discovered that
he had changed his will.

Lenore is out and
Jennifer gets everything.

I knew it. That's
it. Case closed.

No, no. Wait just a minute.

There's nothing solid there.

Uh, actually, there is.

While I was going through

Stratton's desk, I just
happened upon Stan Macky's file

conveniently laying
on top of the desk.

Well, then how do you
know it wasn't Macky

that Bill went to see that
night and he killed him?

That's exactly what the
killer wants us to think.

Except for one thing.

His secretary didn't pull
the file and she doubts

that Stratton did it himself.

So I had the folder printed
and guess whose prints

came up all over the file?

Jennifer?

I think she's setting Macky up.

So she can get a bundle
of cash free and clear.

You know, there may
be some explanation

for the folder, though.

How do you explain the gun?

You found it?

In a storm drain
near Stratton's office,

and Jennifer's
fingerprints were all over it.

Oh, my.

I think it's time we
had a little talk with her.

Look, Dad, I know this
is hard on you, so I'll...

I'll do it alone.

Well, I should go
with you as a backup.

I'll go with you.

It's all right, Jesse.

It's not a problem.
See ya later, Dad.

Yeah, right. Later.

Jesse, you are
not going with me.

♪ I am the very model of
a modern major general ♪

♪ I'm information
vegetable and... ♪

Come on. Start
playing it. That's it.

Two, three.

Go.

♪ I am the very model ♪

I can't do it with the music.

Mrs. Stratton, it's
Detective Sloan.

Mrs. Stratton?

Hello?

Anybody?

There's got to be somebody here.

You check in there.

I'll take a look on the terrace.

I can't find her anywhere.

Do you hear that?

I'll check around back.

Give me a hand.

I've got it.

Let's get her out of here.

Okay. Easy.

See if you can help
her. I'll get the car.

This is Sloan. I need
an ambulance right away.

Never mind.

She's dead.

She also confessed.

Suicide?

She knew we were getting close.

I'm sorry, Dad.

She signed a confession?

Told the whole story.

Sneaking into Bill's office,
shooting him, tossing the gun.

I'm on my way to tell Joan now.

You want to come along?

Yeah. Yeah, I think I should.

I'm really very sorry.

Are you okay?

I-It's just such...

And she confessed to everything?

We checked.

The note was in her handwriting.

Well, I suppose I'd better make
some arrangements or something.

Joan, there's one
thing we need to know.

Why did you lie to us about
the night Bill was killed?

What are you talking about?

You said the two of
you were together,

but a deliveryman saw
Jennifer arrive home.

Did you know she was
going to Bill's office?

No, I swear I didn't.

Jennifer told me that
she was meeting Lenore

to lend her some money.

Why?

Bill thought that Lenore's
bookshop was a bad investment.

So he wouldn't help her.

Jennifer said that
she felt sorry for her

and that she was going to
meet her without Bill knowing.

Why didn't you say something?

Well, after what
happened to Bill,

Jenny said that it wouldn't
look good... her being gone.

I swear I was just
trying to help her.

It never occurred to me
that she could hurt anyone.

I understand.

Maybe if I'd known
she was so depressed

when I called her...

maybe she'd still be alive.

You talked to her?

What time was that?

Uh... I don't know.

About 3:30.

Well, look, don't
blame yourself.

There's nothing
you could have done.

Thank you for saying that.

We'll be in touch.

What's on your mind?

What time did you and
Jesse find Jennifer's body?

I think it was about 3:30.

Well, if she talked
to Joan then,

it would have to be
at least 3:40, 3:45.

I could check my notes.

Yeah, do that.

I'm going to go back and
look in Jennifer's garage again.

What for?

We've got a murder weapon
with prints and a signed confession.

It's not hard to figure out

that Jennifer did it and
then checked herself out.

That's just it. It's not hard.

As a matter of fact,
it's awfully easy.

Come on. I'll buy you a donut.

Cops.

Let's go this way first.

Now tell me again, did you
notice anything at all unusual

when you discovered the body?

Aside from her being dead? No.

What color was her skin?

Was it pale? Was it bright red?

Neither.

It was pretty normal in color.

How was the body positioned?

Um... kind of head slumped
over, resting on the steering wheel.

Ow.

Sorry.

How high would you say

that ceiling is?

I don't know. 20 feet?

Hmm, about 20, yeah.

Mark, what is this all about?

Well, first of all,
carbon monoxide death

usually causes the
skin to turn cherry red.

And the victim normally
will get sleepy first

and lay to the side
before succumbing.

Oh, believe me, this
place was filled with fumes.

Oh, I'm sure it was,

but according to
my calculations,

given the size of this garage

and the fact that very
little fuel was burned,

I don't think there was enough

carbon monoxide
generated to kill Jennifer.

Then what did?

Well, I think that's something
we're going to have to find out.

You're not going to
rehearse with me anymore?

Norman, I can't rehearse
with you anymore.

I need the piano part.
I taped the piano part.

And all the general's
stuff is here?

All the general's
stuff is on there.

Good. Then you
can just coach me.

No, but I'll be there in spirit.

I don't want you
there in spirit, Mark.

Norman, just remember it's tempo,
articulation, and have fun with it.

Excuse me.

Mark, what's going on?

The coroner just delivered
Jennifer Stratton's body

to the pathology lab.

Good. I'll explain on the way.

But the audition's
tomorrow. Norman, I'm sorry,

but I've got an autopsy
today. But I'm not the model

of a modern major general yet.

I don't think I can
do it without you.

Carry on.

Jesse, please don't
breathe down my back.

You're taking the starch
out of my uniform. Sorry.

Anything unusual in the prelim?

Uh, no.

Stomach contents normal.

She wore contact lenses.

Body showed no obvious
abrasions or contusions.

Contacts. That figures.

Joan wears glasses

and it's not unusual for
identical twins' eyesight

to progress at the
nearly identical pattern.

I can't see any other cause.

Even childhood diseases
like measles and chicken pox.

When twins have
been raised separately,

the onset is at nearly
the identical time.

What were the carboxy
hemoglobin levels in the blood?

At five percent.

Well, that's not even consistent
with the cause of death.

There'd have to be much
higher levels than that.

Do you guys remember the
story about those two twins

that were reunited
after 39 years

and they had weighed
the exact same weight?

And at the reunion,
they were wearing

the same color shirts,
same tie, same pants.

In fact, they had both

even been married twice, first
time to women named Linda,

the second time to women
named Betty or something,

and they had even named
their kids the same names.

Isn't that fascinating?

No. No.

Not even a little?

Hyoid cartilage. Yeah.

Hemorrhage on both
sides of the larynx as well.

Strangulation?

Yeah. Tough
way to kill yourself.

Jennifer was murdered.

You know, it's a pretty good bet

that whoever killed
Jennifer killed Bill.

How do you account for the fact

that Jennifer's prints were
all over the gun that killed Bill?

I can't.

But let's think about it.

We've got three people
who all have very real motives

for killing the both of them: Macky,
Helms and Lenore. Mm-hmm.

Well, Macky knew that Bill
had major information on him

that could put him in prison.

And Jennifer tried to set
him up for Bill's murder.

That couldn't have made
Mr. Macky very happy.

And Helms...

well, Bill cut him
out of the law firm.

And Jennifer got
him to do it, too.

Then, of course, we have Lenore.

An angry daughter who
should have inherited.

But then along comes step-mommy
number four who gets it all.

You know, now
that Jennifer's dead,

it's going to be pretty
interesting to see

if all that money
reverts back to Lenore.

Hmm.

Mrs. Craymore's
digging into Jennifer's will

to see who's going to
get real rich real quick.

Did you run a check on Joan?

She's very anxious to get
her sister's body cremated.

Already did.

You know, maybe Amanda

should talk to Lenore
again, though, anyway.

Good idea.

Son, can I get you something?

Chicken, pig, water buffalo?

Something like that?

No, thanks, Dad.

I'm not very hungry.

Just the thought that
Jennifer would loan me money

to save this place...

Thank you.

God bless her dead little hide.

And your father wouldn't, huh?

No way. No.

You did know that your father
had cut you out of his will, huh?

Yeah. I'm pretty sure
Jennifer put him up to it.

Did you know about Jennifer's?

No. No. I didn't
know she had a will.

Look, I know you
didn't come here

to help me pack.

I was here the day
Jennifer died. All day.

You can ask the movers or...

Polly, the
waitress, if you like.

I'm really relieved
to hear you say that.

So, you're really broke?

Oh...

Uh... completely.

But I've been broke before.

Sorry.

No. Don't be.
I'm so sick of it all.

It's so tacky.

At least now I can
get on with my own life.

And you have all of these.

Yes.

A wonderful bunch of ladies.

Mmm.

You know, for what it's worth,

I think your father
missed out on an awful lot.

Yeah.

Me, too.

We're here to see Dr. Sloan.

I'm not sure Dr. Sloan is
in the hospital right now.

Uh... lady... uh... Barbara,

I would be loathe to intrude
upon your valuable time

if I were not already assured

that Dr. Sloan
was in the building.

Well, I guess I could page him.

I was telling my associate as
we approached your station,

I said to him...
"She's a clever one."

Yes, well...

Could I tell Dr. Sloan
the nature of your visit?

Yeah. Let's just say, uh...
I have a nervous condition.

Well, I guess I don't

have to join the Actors Guild.

You lost the part. I'm sorry.

But I am the very model
of a modern major general.

Who got it?

Milo Zuttman. He was pathetic.

♪ I'm information vegetable,
animal and mineral... ♪

Bang. Out go his dentures.

Then his back seizes up

when he goes to pick them up.

How did he get the part?

Well, it's community theater.

The bigger the donation,
the bigger the part.

Milo is worth millions.

That's a shame. I'm sorry.

Ah, what are you gonna do? Okay.

Did you get a part,

by the way?

Oh, I got a part.

I got a part.

The third policeman.

From the general to
the third policeman.

I'm going back to therapy.

Uh... Mr., Mr. Macky.

Dr. Sloan, we have
something we need to discuss.

Why, sure. You want
to step into my office?

No, here is fine.
Here's fine with me.

Look, I had a great
association with Bill

until he looked too closely
into some of my enterprises.

You must have
been a little surprised

when your own lawyer might
have turned you in to the INS.

Yeah, he had, uh... such, uh...

What is it?

Uh... uh...

Moral principles?

Yeah. I hate principles.

Fortunately, Jennifer

persuaded him to
look the other way

when it came to my
entrepreneurial skills.

Jennifer did that?

Yeah. I introduced her
to Stratton, you know.

And Jennifer made it
very much worth my while.

Jennifer's dead, you know.

Yes, I know. And I hear that
you are pointing the finger at me.

You see these?

Yes. Uh... Uh...
Airplane tickets.

You were out of the country
the night Jennifer was killed.

Yeah, I was in Rome.

I knew that.

You did?

Yeah, I did, so

I don't know why
anybody would say

I was pointing anything at you.

So there's no need for me

to be doing this
song-and-dance routine?

Not as far as I'm concerned.

That's that.

That's that.

Huh.

What's the matter with you?

You bring me all the
way down here, Alex?

You think I need this?

Doctor.

Get outside, you.

I can't believe you.

This is the second
time with you.

Take these tickets.

There you are.

Hi. What'd you find out?

Well, we can count Lenore
out as a suspect... for anything.

So where was she
when Jennifer was killed?

In her coffee shop
with loads of witnesses.

Wow. Hey, guys.

Hi. Hi, what's up?

Well, you can scratch
Helms as a suspect.

He was in the county drunk tank

when Jennifer was killed.

So that's Lenore
and Helms off the list.

And Macky. He was
out of the country.

Well, who's left?

Well, guess who Jennifer
left her inherited estate to?

The same person who quit

her government job the
day after Jennifer was killed.

Joan?

The one and only.

You want to go
with me on this one?

Oh, absolutely.

See you later.

Listen, before we go,

can I have look
through her phone bill

for the last few weeks?

I'll call it in from the car.

I have to get out of here.

This whole thing has
just been too much.

Where are you going?

Mexico. It's cheap.

I wouldn't think
you'd be worried

about cheap anymore.

Since Jennifer left
you everything, uh...

you're gonna be a
wealthy woman soon.

We know about the phone call.

You called the Stratton house

right in the middle of
their anniversary party.

Your phone bill proves it.

You were the one
with the "emergency,"

the one Bill thought he
was going meet that night.

Okay, now, wait a minute.

Jenny asked me to call Bill

to get him out of
the house for a while.

I never went to his office.

I thought I was helping

Jennifer get money to Lenore.

I honestly thought

that's where she went.

Joan, you just don't strike
me as being that gullible.

I did not kill Bill.

I was at the house all night.

People saw me there:
the maid, the delivery boy.

Oh, Jennifer did kill Bill,

but then you killed Jennifer.

My own sister?

You think I could do that?

Here's what I think.

I think you and your
sister got together on this.

I think you made
that phone call,

and I think you
backed up her alibi

while she went down
and killed her husband,

and I think you were both
going to split the money.

Are you charging me with murder?

We're pretty close.

And you're basing all of
this on a phone bill that says

I called my sister
on her anniversary?

Well, I'm sorry.

You have nothing.

Now, I have a plane to catch,

and I would like you
both to please leave.

Couldn't you have
held her for questioning

till we got some more?

I tried. The DA
wouldn't go for it.

Well, we better
get something quick

or she's gonna be gone.

Yeah, the airport
says that plane

she has to catch is
Stratton's private jet.

She'll be in Mexico by midnight.

Yeah, and who knows
where the next day?

Well, somewhere with easy access

to a Swiss bank
account, I don't doubt.

No doubt.

The answer is somewhere in
this autopsy report. I know it.

Dad, you've been through
that thing a million times.

Where's my glasses?

Ah...

Glasses.

Glasses?

Let's get to the airport.

Punch 651.

Airport security.

Police. Open up the gate.

You have to come inside, sir.

I haven't got time
to come inside.

Well, I'm sorry, sir.
This is a private airport.

I'm gonna have to
ask you to come inside.

All right. All right.

Okay.

Hey. Hey.

Let's go.

This is outrageous.

You're gonna be
hearing from my lawyer.

Yeah, you're gonna need one.

Oh. It was such a little thing.

What are you talking about?

Open your bag.

Open the bag.

Ah. Saline solution.

I saw it when you were
packing and it didn't dawn on me.

It only hit me later.

Why would Joan have
saline solution for contacts?

Joan wears glasses; Jennifer

wears contacts.

I'm going to miss my plane

because of a bottle of saline?

You got Stan Macky
to introduce you to Bill,

and he fell in love.

He married Jennifer.

That's right: he married you,

but you got greedy.

Why did you have to
have it all, Jennifer?

Oh, this is ridiculous.

You knew if you killed Bill,

there was a good
chance you'd get caught.

So you brought Joan in on it.

She was up for it.

What she didn't know

is you had a whole
'nother plan for her.

You killed Bill and
framed yourself.

Then you strangled
Joan and you put her

in that car and wrote
your own confession.

And since "Jennifer"
was dead of a suicide,

there wouldn't be
any investigation.

Case closed, no loose ends.

You two have been having
a field day, haven't you?

Oh, one other little thing.

You made a small
mistake in the garage

when you put the
contacts in Joan's eyes.

You put the left
one in the right eye,

and the right
one in the left eye.

I was that close?

Oh, you were very close.

It's the little things
that'll kill you.

How come you didn't mention
this contact lens mix-up

in the autopsy report?

It wasn't in the report.

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