Desperate Housewives (2004–2012): Season 7, Episode 17 - Everything's Different, Nothing's Changed - full transcript

Paul causes problems for Susan and her kidney transplant; Bree becomes concerned over Andrew's escalating alcohol consumption; Renee continues with her neighbourhood party, following a resident's tragic suicide.


We are going to do everything
we can to get you a kidney.

In the meantime, live your life.

If there's things you're thinking
about doing, do them now.

Susan's condition got worse.

You're dying, and there's not
a damn thing I can do about it.

Beth was rejected by her husband...

I kicked you out of this house.

That was the end!

And abandoned by her mother.

I have no more use for you.

But Bree brought hope.

Has the transplant office
reached you?

Am I a match?

I'm here to donate a kidney. It's
the most important thing I've ever done.

And Beth made the ultimate sacrifice.

We need some help over here!

We can never know

the moment our lives
are about to change forever.

We might be preparing dinner...

coming home after a long day...

enjoying a glass of wine...

tending to our aches and pains.

And then...

when we least expect it...

the moment comes.

Craig Lynwood from Fairview Memorial.

This is Dr. Jenkins
from Fairview Memorial.

We have a kidney for you.

I'm sorry to tell you
there's been a terrible accident.

What kind of accident?

Your wife shot herself.

Mike! We have a kidney!

Is she dead?

We're keeping her on life support,

but I'm afraid
there's no brain activity.

How soon can we do this?

How soon can you get here?

I don't understand.

If there's no brain function,
why is she on life support?

Your wife is an organ donor,
and we need to...


You are not to touch her
until I get there.

There are moments
that change our lives forever...

but not always in the way...

we might expect.

Subtitles by Wisteria Team

The women of Wisteria Lane

look for any excuse to celebrate.

A bottle of champagne

when you're not expecting...

A new dress, for turning 39...


A triple fudge cake
to reward a personal best.

So when my friends heard
about Susan's good fortune,

they just couldn't resist.


What are you supposed to say
when someone gets an organ?


How about "congratulations"?

We are so thrilled for you.
When is this happening?

I guess tonight.

So will you still be
at my party Saturday?

Because you did R.S.V.P.

It depends. Can you move the party
into the intensive care unit?

So that's a no.

Gaby's in charge of the guest list,

in case anybody else
decides to flake at the last minute.

I didn't know
you'd be bringing an entourage.

It's a happy day on our street.

I would imagine,
a bit of a sad one, too.

I can just call the caterers, and say
there's one less person. No big deal.

Isn't that a little harsh?
I mean, she was a neighbor.

- Who are you talking about?
- Your donor, Beth Young.

Beth is her donor?


you don't know any of this?

Beth came to the E.R.
with the transplant papers,

and then she shot herself.

Is she dead?

She's on life support,
but she's not gonna make it.

I thought you knew.

Her husband is with her.

We want to give him
some more time with her,

so we're anticipating
a bit of a delay.

Poor Beth.

I just saw her yesterday.

She seemed off,
but she always seemed a little off,

so I left.

How could I not have realized
she was in so much pain?

Bree, you couldn't have known
this would happen.

You okay?

I don't know.

It sounds
like nothing's gonna happen tonight.

Why don't you just all go home
and get some sleep?

Get your ass over here.
I got something that belongs to you.

Little hint.

It reeks of mal tais
and you gave birth to it!

I come downstairs to make
breakfast, and there he is,

passed out, stewed to the gills.

Again, Karen, we are so sorry.

If I wanted a drunk homo on my couch,

I would have married
my college boyfriend.

You can let me go, all right?
I'm okay.


You broke into a neighbor's house
and passed out.

I didn't break in...

I got a little confused, and...

went in the wrong house.

You got to admit,
all these places kind of look the same.

When you're drunk!
Andrew, this is not good.

Calm down, all right?

I just had a little
too much fun last night.

You need to be very careful.

Thanks to me, you have
a genetic predisposition to alcoholism.

Just 'cause you're one,
you want everyone in your little club?

I'm not an alcoholic.

I got everything under control.

- How bad is it?
- It's really bad.

When did it start?

A while ago.
First it was just on the weekends,

then sometimes during the week,
and now it's every night.

I wish you had told me.

You know what I've started to do?

I pretend I have to work late,

so I don't have to come home
and deal with him.

- You need to talk to him.
- I have.

And he promises it'll get better,
but it only gets worse.

I love him.

I can't take it.

- I know. It's very difficult.
- No, Bree. I'm thinking of leaving him.

Please don't. Not yet.

Let me try to get him some help.
I'll talk to him.

No offense, but I don't think
you're gonna get through to him.

Don't be so sure.
I once smuggled vodka into church

in a "jesus saves" sports bottle.

I can be pretty resourceful.

Tables and chairs go out back,

chafing dishes and flatware
in the kitchen,

and eyes off the boobs,
but thanks for noticing.

I saw the truck.
What's going on?

What do you think?
It's for our party tomorrow night.

Our spring fling?
We're still flinging?

- Why wouldn't we be?
- I don't know.

Unless the theme is
"neighbors who blow their brains out",

I kind of thought the Beth Young thing
might put a damper on the festivities.

She wasn't even invited.

We can't ignore the fact
that one of our neighbors is dead.

Big difference.

Besides, she seems like a clinger.

Bet she'll stick around for months.

So you think it's okay
that we still throw this party?

It's not a party.
It's an event.

Would you cancel the oscars?

The invitations have been sent,
the caterer's been hired.

Life is for the living,
so let's live.

The living did buy a new dress...


And I'm sure Beth would have loved
to have seen you in that Versace.

She would have, wouldn't she?

In a way,
it could be a tribute to her.

And I did see
the perfect tribute shoes at the mall.

Now that is the spirit.

Make sure the guests know
the party is still on,

I will take care of the arrangements.

Maybe we could have
a moment of silence

and then a champagne toast.

Fabulous idea,

except instead of champagne,
let's do mojitos,

and instead of Beth,
let's toast to us.

And the moment of silence?

Would sound great with music.

Paul, I want you to know
how sorry I am.

Can't imagine
what you're going through now.

I want you to know how grateful I am

for this gift that Beth is giving me.

Obviously, it doesn't bring her back.

But I hope it will be
a small comfort to you

knowing that in some way
she'll live on.

Why would that give me comfort?

Are you trying to tell me
that my wife is dead

and that you're
the consolation prize?

That's not what I'm saying-.

I hate to disappoint you,
but my wife's not dead.

She's very much alive.

- They told me there was no chance...
- I don't care what they told you.

Beth is alive, and I intend to keep her
that way as long as possible.

I'm not going to allow you
to strip her for parts

like some abandoned car.

That's not what's happening here.
This was Beth's idea.

Beth was not in her right mind
when she signed those forms.

As far as I'm concerned,
they mean nothing.

And what makes you think
you deserve her kidney?

Was it those meals
you shared with her?

All the girls' nights
you included her in?

The little gestures of kindness
you offered to make her feel less alone?


You gave her nothing in life,

and that's exactly
what you're going to get in death.

I don't get this.
Beth signed the donation forms.

And a living will.
Those are legal documents.

- Aren't they binding?
- Yes and no.

You're gonna have to do a little better
than "yes and no".

They'll stand up in court,
but this hospital's not inclined

to wage a legal battle
against a grieving husband.

It's too delicate.

He's not a grieving husband.
Paul has a vendetta against my family.

He's only doing this
to make us suffer.

Look, we can't publicly support you,

but if you decide to take this on,
we won't stand in your way.

You're damn right
we're gonna take this on.


- We're not fighting Paul.
- This is your life we're talking about.

We can't let him win.

His wife shot herself.

And you want to, what, hire lawyers?
Drag him to court?

I know
that you're only thinking of me,

but this is Paul's decision to make.

It's not ours.

I just want to go home.

Thanks for helping me drop these off.

No problem.
It's nice to be out of the house.

When did you start catering again?

It's nothing official,
just when I'm needed.

And who's the client?

They prefer to remain anonymous.

Coffee? Doughnuts?

The old drunk guy
from outside the supermarket?

This is an A.A. Meeting.

It's a wonderful program.

Lying to your son,
which step is that?

But now that you're here,
why don't you give it a try?

Just listen to people's shares
and see if you relate.

What am I supposed to say
when I get up there and talk?

"Hello, my name is Andrew.
My mommy brought me"?

No one has to know we're related.

Just one meeting.

It could save your life.

I see you've met Bree.
My name's Tommy. Welcome.

- First time?
- Yes, first time.

My name is Elvis.

That's your name?

Yes, it's Elvis.

Yet another reason for me
to be mad at my mother.


We'd have played better
if there was a windmill.

Glenn Morris,
C.E.O. of Morris Technologies...

A man who can throw a 6-iron
farther than he can hit with one.

Nice to meet you.

Come over for a beer?

You know? I should go.
Next time.

Do you mind if I use the facilities
before I hit the road?

No. Come on in.

The bathroom's down there.

We have five kids.
You might want to squint.

Actually, I don't need a bathroom.

I need a C.F.O.

My chief financial officer
took a job in London,

and there's one name on my list
for his replacement.

I know that guy.

Glenn, where'd this come from?

Carlos is always bragging about you,
so I started asking around.

Come to find out everybody loves you.

What's not to love about Tom Scavo?

I'm prepared to give you
a very generous salary, stock options,

access to the company jet.

This is amazing.

But no.

We just found something not to love
about Tom Scavo. What?

Carlos is a close friend,
we're just starting our busy season.

I can't leave him in the lurch.

I don't want to buy a man
out of his loyalty.

You could try.
It never hurts to put in an offer.

You have made my day,
but I gotta pass.

This conversation isn't over.

I hope you're gonna talk some sense
into this husband of yours.

Talk, beat,
whatever gets the job done.

Now is when you wink,
rub your hands together,

and tell me you were playing
that man like a fiddle,

'cause this blank stare...

That's not fading
is scaring the hell out of me.

I'm not gonna screw over Carlos.

What's the matter with you?
Whatever happened to integrity?


It got a better offer from Glenn
and turned into prosperity.

As much as I appreciate you trying
to run my life, this is my decision,

and I'm saying no.

We have a little time left.

Anyone else want to share?


It's not mandatory,
but we'd love to hear from you.

I pass.

This is a safe place.
No one here is going to judge you.

You know...

When you talk about how other people
try to control your lives,

like Ed here with his boss

or Mary Ann with her cat,

you know, I can relate.

I have the same kind of problem
with my mother.

I think her greatest regret in life

is the fact that she gave birth
to a son and not a puppet.

She's such a control freak

that my sister and I
used to call her "Attila the mom".

Could we not laugh?

We're trying to heal here.

Nothing I ever did
was good enough for her.

Like in the tenth grade,

I wanted to run for class president,

and the night
before I was gonna announce,

she said: "Are you sure about this?"

"You're not exactly a born leader."

She sounds awful.

Or she sounds like a loving mother
protecting her son from disappointment?

I don't think so,
she wouldn't even listen to my speech.

Maybe she was busy preparing dinner
for a family of four

with no help from her son.

It is hard work making dinner

while maintaining an atmosphere
of emotional repression.

If you ask me, some emotions
could stand to be repressed.

I'm sorry,
but we're here to stop drinking,

not criticize the women
who gave us life.

He's just trying to share.

There is a difference
between sharing and whining.

We are definitely out of time.
Thank you, everybody.

Now let's just join hands
and recite the serenity prayer.


Grant me the serenity

to accept the things I cannot change,

the courage
to change the things that I can,

and the wisdom
to know the difference.

I wanted to remind you the party
Renee and I are throwing tomorrow.

You're still having that thing?

- A woman's on life support.
- Exactly.

She's not dead. It's like
you're making my argument for me.

Put Roy and me down for a "No",

but please, call us when you have
your hurricane Katrina pool party.

Renee and I
are still having our party...

Are you nuts?

Our friend across the street,
Betty Young, just blew her brains out.

Beth Young.

I got her name wrong.
How disrespectful.

I hope you don't tell that story
tomorrow at your party.

It's a little neighborhood gathering.

Gabrielle, what is wrong with you?

We didn't know Beth very well,

but we did know Mary Alice,

and this tragic event has brought up
a lot of painful memories for us.

How could you not realize that?

They can all go to hell.

- We're still having the party.
- Are you listening to me?

I got four "Are you out of your minds",
three "You make me want to puke",

and one "Maybe" from Lee.
The message is pretty clear.

"Order less shrimp."

We should have canceled this party
the moment we heard about Beth.

- Nobody liked her.
- It doesn't matter.

It's in horrible taste.
Why can't we just change the date?

For ten years I've had my spring fling
the first Sunday of April,

not the second Sunday, not the third,

and not when a bunch of wimps
decide they're ready to stop moping.

I'm not canceling.

- But nobody's gonna be here.
- Well, we'll see about that.

My social life
is not gonna come to a stop

just because some cuckoo bird decides
to clean her ears with a handgun.

For what?

Making me the compassionate one.

Is he asleep already?

Yeah, he was exhausted.

Not even Harry Potter
could keep him awake tonight.

I'm not trying to upset you,
and I'm not mad,

but why you won't let me fight
to get you the kidney.

I don't know. It's just...

it just feels wrong.

It shouldn't.
Beth wanted you to have it.


She killed herself
so I could have her kidney. Why?

Paul's right.

I never had so much
as a pleasant exchange with the woman.

I don't know that the reason matters.
What matters is, it was her final wish.

But it doesn't make any sense.

I can't take her kidney,

knowing that maybe I'm the reason
she's lying in that hospital.

Hey, I'm reading.

Good evening, sir.

Welcome aboard.

Can I get you anything before we...

take off?

You could help me
put my bag under the seat.

You're not good at this,
so let me do the talking.

May I help you with your seat belt?


You're already
in the upright and locked position.

What's the name of this airline?

I want to become a frequent flyer.

This isn't a commercial airline, sir.

Hotshot executives like you
only fly on the corporate jet.

I'm not taking that job.

Then you'll be handling your own bags
from now on.

Lynette, we talked about this.

I won't leave Carlos in the lurch.

Great, you're loyal.
I love that.

But your stock went way up today.

If you're gonna stay put, could you try
to get something out of this?

I could tell Carlos about the offer,
see if he'll match the number.

Match the number?


A seat just opened up.

I wondered if you would come.

They told me at the hospital
you're trying to have Beth declared dead

and her life support turned off.

- That's not going to happen.
- It has to.

- Why?
- Because she's dead.

No, she's not.

My daughter's dead.

Your wife is dead.

We both know what killed her.

If you're trying
to blame me for this...

If this is your last attempt
to use her to hurt me...

We don't get to use her anymore.

This sick game you and I play,

this hate we hurl at each other

has finally found a victim...

the only innocent person in the game.

I did nothing.

You refused to believe she loved you.

I turned her away because she did.

And now she's gone.


Maybe she can recover.

I believe she can.

You must believe it, too,
or you wouldn't pray for her.

I'm not praying for her.

I'm praying for forgiveness.

We did this to her, Paul.

Now we have to stop.

And we have to let her rest.

Can I come in?


I'm on my way to a meeting
and I was hoping you might join me.

The deal was one meeting, mom.

I went and I'm done.

You won't go back?
Even for me?

Elvis has left the building.

I don't need to go, I'm fine.

I hope you know
that "I don't have a problem"

is one of the biggest clich?s
in our playbook.

Don't get me wrong.
I have plenty of problems.

I have no job.

Alex works these crazy 18-hour shifts
at the hospital.

What's my day?

Long, endless stretches of nothing.

I work out.

I do laundry.

I dusted the other day.

Actually dusted and felt proud.

How pathetic is that?

I don't find that pathetic.

I know you don't.

The one thing that gets me through

is knowing
that when the night rolls around,

I can just have a few drinks
and kick back.

And as long as I don't hurt anyone,
I think I'm allowed.

Trust me.

I'll be okay.

If you say so.

- What?
- You listen to me.

There's been a terrible tragedy
in our neighborhood.

A woman felt desperate
and alone and killed herself

because nobody cared enough
to help her.

And the thing is, I was there.

I saw that something was wrong...

and I walked away.

And I am never gonna let myself
do that again,

and certainly not with you.

Alex left me.

I guess he just got sick
of living with a drunk.

What did I do?

- I wrecked my marriage.
- It's gonna get better.

I promise you it's gonna get better.

But for that to start,

you need to go to a meeting.

I can't get up
in front of a bunch of strangers

and talk about this.


we can have a meeting right here...

just the two of us.

What do you say?

That's Glenn for you.
He's nothing if not aggressive.

I swear I didn't seek this out.

I know you didn't.

You're a stand-up guy for telling me.

But it is a very generous offer,

and I figured
if that's my value in the marketplace,

that maybe I should be...

Doing a little better here.

Look, our friendship aside,
you're a valuable part of this company.

And if I had the cash...

you know I'd step up.

- But...
- You know how rough things have been.

You've seen the empty desks.
We can't offer you that kind of money.

But I don't want to lose you,
so here's what I can offer...

title bump to chief marketing officer,
car allowance, and...

profit participation.

- How's that sound?
- It sounds like a bunch of crap.

Of course he pleaded poverty.

Did you play hardball?
Did you grind him?

That's how I got
profit participation.

I worked at that company, remember?

At the end of the year, Carlos
takes the excess cash as a bonus,

so there is no profit
to participate in.

What else did he offer you?
A bogus new title?

Not bogus!
Chief marketing officer.


And a car allowance.

That's great.

"Here's your allowance, Tommy.
Good luck on your paper route."

You are over the line, Lynette.

And you are walking away
from real money and real power

for pretend profits
and a made-up title.

Carlos might as well call you

"King of all important things"
and give you a pile of Monopoly money.

Why do you keep pushing like this?

If I don't, you go nowhere.

So that's where you think I am?


You're not gonna take that back?

I think you are
an amazing husband and father.

But as a businessman...

You're 46 and you're still trying
to establish yourself.

Opportunities like this
don't keep falling from the sky.

- You gotta grab 'em.
- By stabbing my friend in the back?

Do you think he'd hesitate
if the roles were reversed?

Not a chance.
That's how he got where he is.

- He's ruthless.
- You wanna see me get ruthless?

Watch what happens
if you don't drop this.

This is some crowd.

Told ya.

I'm pretty close to capacity,
so you're gonna have to scoot along.

I'm just stunned so many people came.

Just shows you how little you know
about the party circuit elite.

Is that the guy from animal control
who picks up dead birds?

What? No.

These are mostly people I've met*
through the years in the Caribbean.

I was going to call you.

Is it okay if I clean your pool
on Thursday instead of Wednesday?

Of course.

If you think you'll make it back
from St. Barts by then.

Don't give me that look.

A good hostess knows the best parties
have a mix of people.

Honey, the only mix I see

is the cotton/poly blend
on every dress in this room.

Beat it!

You have a cool house.

I don't get it.

Why have a party when you people
you really want are too sad to come?

I'm not sad,
and I'm not gonna pretend to be.

I know you didn't like Beth,
but come on, she's dying.

And whose fault is that?

Everyone keeps acting like this
horrible thing happened to her.

It didn't just happen.
She did it to herself.

Think about how much pain
she must have been in.

Everyone has pain.

But only a selfish bitch checks out
and passes it on to everyone else.

Beth didn't care who she hurt.
Her mother, her husband, her daughter!

She didn't have a daughter.

Amen for that, at least.

Honey, you told me your mom died
when you were young.

You never said how.

Did she take her own life?

What do you think?

Damn it.

How hard is it to fill an ice bucket?

I lost a parent
when I was a kid, too.

My dad.

I'm not making comparisons here,

and I understand
if you don't wanna talk about it.

Good, 'cause I don't.

But I think that if you do...

Do what?

I'll feel so much better
if I let it all out?

That doesn't work for me.
I'm not a hug-and-learn kind of gal.

No, I guess you're
a throw-party-and-forget kind of gal.

I will never forget
what my mother did.

I think about it every day.

But I refuse to let it be
what defines me.

This spring fling might seem shallow

and insensitive to you,

but it's my way of saying
I choose life...

over death.

Now if you'll excuse me,
I gotta get back to my lame-ass party.

It's not a lame-ass party anymore...

Because I'm here now.

0 to 60 in under 5 seconds,
top speed of 160, and no cup holder...

'cause you'll want both hands
on the wheel.

Can I take it for a test drive?

It would be our pleasure.

So is the car for you?
Your husband?

Actually, no.

It's for our neighbor.

Is something wrong?

Guess who's got a brand-new slap
in a face parked in front of his house?

What are you talking about?

The day after he cries poor to me,

he goes out
and buys himself a $70,000 lotus?

I think the evora runs around $76,000,
but what do I know?

You were right, Lynette.

I'm a pushover.

I'm being loyal to a guy who does
nothing but look out for himself.

You must feel really betrayed.

I got half a mind to call Glenn now
and take that offer.

I say...

use your whole mind and do it.

I am in.

I am excited, too.

You wanna have lunch tomorrow
and hash out the details?

I will see you then.

Feels good?

Feels real good.

You know
what's gonna feel even better?

Telling carlos to go screw himself.

No! Wait! Wait!

Don't try and stop me!

I'm gonna tell that guy
just where he can stick his Evora.

Before you do, it's not Carlos'.

I borrowed it from the dealer
and I parked it there.

- What?
- I know. I'm sorry.

It sounds very bad,
but I did it for a very good reason.

That you can manipulate me
into doing whatever you want?

Carlos didn't buy that car,
he could have without even feeling it...

Because he's the kind of guy

who doesn't let a good opportunity
get by him.

you're his dutiful number two,

staring down the street
at a car you wish you had.

Get in. We're taking it back,
then I'm calling Glenn.

- Just one...
- Get in.

This could be you, driving this car,

living this life,

being that guy.

I understand if you wanna say no
to all that,

but I don't even think
you've asked yourself, do I want it?

It would be better
if you didn't talk right now.

I can't tell if we are gonna drive...

or fly.

What time does it have to be back?

He said 4:00,
but they don't close till 6:00.

I'm guessing
we could be a little late.

Let's be a little late.

Would it be okay if I came in?

Actually, I was...


I've never been to your apartment.

It's not much.

No, it's quite nice.

I'm on my way to the hospital
to see Beth...

to say good-bye.

I've alerted the transplant office
that we'll be moving forward

with her request.

I'm sure as soon as I sign the papers,
they'll be contacting you.

I don't understand.

You're getting your kidney.

I thought you said...

I would be very grateful
to you if you could...

Forget a lot of the things
that I said.

You were right, Paul.

I was terrible to Beth.
I was.

I never gave her a chance.

I never tried to get to know her.

Why would she do this for me

when I did nothing to deserve it?

Beth didn't love people
because they deserved it.

Believe me. I know that.

I'm so confused...

I don't know if I can accept.

Honor Beth's life
by allowing her to make you well,

for your son,

for your family,

for your friends.

I am so...

very, very sorry about your wife.

I am, too.

There comes a moment
when our lives change forever...

The moment we admit our weaknesses...

The moment we rise to a challenge...

The moment we accept a sacrifice...

or let a loved one go.

And sometimes...

the change in our lives...

is an answer to our prayers.

Thought I found you here.

So sorry for your loss.

I'm sure this is a small consolation.

But I've just heard
from the parole board,

they've decided to grant your request
for humanitarian release.

Ironic, isn't it?

My daughter had to die,
so I could go free?

Again, my condolences.