Dawson's Creek (1998–2003): Season 5, Episode 13 - Something Wilder - full transcript
On Dawson's first day in his new film school, Oliver Chirkchick (the somewhat obnoxious filmmaker Dawson met at the New Hampshire film festival) starts showing him around and wastes no time in asking Dawson to direct a movie that he wrote. Reluctant to direct someone else's work, Dawson starts giving notes to Oliver on the script. Jen, on the other hand, is having some problems when her current state of happiness is reflecting on her radio on-air performance. Meanwhile, Elliot finally has the courage to ask Joey out, but Joey makes second plans for a gathering with Professor Wilder. She makes a false excuse not to go out with Elliot, and her evening takes an unexpected turn when she and Professor Wilder kiss. Elsewhere, the increasingly arrogant and hot-tempered Jack is reprehended by his brothers for being on academic probation. Irritated, he goes out and has a few too many drinks at Civilization which result in a fight with his fraternity brothers.
-Okay, stop stepping.
-Stop? Okay.
-Okay, there we go. No peeking.
-l'm not peeking, trust me.
Cheaters never prosper.
-Okay.
-Curve to the right.
-This way?
-Curve to the right.
This way? Okay.
Now we're coming--
Sorry.
-That's okay.
-lt was the door.
-There's a chair. Sit down in the chair.
-Sit in the chair.
Okay, all right.
Open your eyes.
For the hands on the eyes game
to work...
-...the present has to be on the table.
-To criticize the method...
...in which the presents are presented
means you will never get presents.
You're very pretty.
All right.
Since it is your big day, and we missed
the requisite back-to-school shopping--
You mean, like the sale at Old Navy?
Right, because
nothing smells more...
...like the first day of school
than cheap fleece.
But l was thinking more along the lines
of the basics. First, number 2 pencils.
A classic.
Pencil sharpener.
Loose-leaf binder paper.
Reinforcement tabbies
for loose-leaf binder paper.
lmpressive. Very thorough.
Pens.
Erasers.
Erasers.
And a ruler.
No math at film school,
but l appreciate the thought.
And finally,
la pi?ce de la r?sistance.
Oh, my God.
l really wanted to
get some Reese's Pieces...
...so l could put them in
the plastic pencil holder...
-...but l felt like it would be too much.
-Nice show of restraint.
Thank you, Jen.
So are you a little nervous?
No, not at all.
lt's three classes, you know?
Nothing too overwhelming,
which is key.
Yeah, that's good.
You're just gonna ease right into it...
...that rigorous college schedule
of napping and drinking.
That's the plan.
What time is your show?
Hey, it's really soon is what it is.
l should actually finish getting ready.
Will you meet me later for lunch?
l would love to.
Baby, l gotta go.
-Okay.
-Okay.
Wait, baby.
Baby. You forgot
your Trapper Keeper.
An oversight on my part.
Couldn't wanna leave
the house without this.
-Thank you.
-Bye-bye.
Have a good day at school, sweetie.
He's so cute.
Admit it, it's one step above
a Jackie Collins novel.
All smut and no substance.
l didn't realize you were so familiar
with Jackie's work.
l mean, don't be
ashamed or anything.
Don't go changing the subject,
doing your little hair-flippy thing...
...trying to distract me.
l'm wise to your ways, Potter.
l'm sorry.
What were you talking about again?
l want you to admit the only reason...
...you like Professor Wilder's book
is because you think he's cute.
Well, l can't,
because that's not true.
lt's obvious the only reason
you don't like his book...
...is you think it's affecting
your mojo with the ladies.
That shows how little you know me.
l have no mojo to speak of.
l think you have a little.
So can l ask you a question?
You can.
Okay, on Friday night,
unless you're busy--
And l know it's only Monday, but
sometimes people, like, make plans...
-...for trips or something kind of early--
-Elliot?
Would you maybe wanna see something
or eat something?
With me?
Are you asking me to dinner
and a movie?
Kind of. But dinner and a movie
just sounded so date, you know.
And this way, you know,
it sounded much better...
...to me, in my mind.
l would love to eat and see
something with you on Friday.
Really?
Am l interrupting?
Are there naked people in here?
-No.
-Oh, bummer.
Well, well, well, looking swanky.
Do l detect some product in your hair?
Are we moussing?
You know, that's my cue,
so l'll see you in class.
-l'll be there.
-Bye, Audrey.
Someone's got a boyfriend.
Audrey, your elementary school
methods of taunting...
-...aren't gonna work this time.
-Who's got a boyfriend? Joey does!
Tickle me one more time,
l swear l will bite you.
Seriously, Joey, what's going on
with you and Nice Guy?
ls he, like, your steady or what?
His name is Elliot, first of all.
He's not my boyfriend.
l have no boyfriend.
And we're just...
...getting to know each other.
But you like him.
What's not to like? He's a--
-Nice guy.
-Nice guy.
Bye.
Yeah.
Why do l feel like all the boys
are looking at me?
Well, because all the boys
are looking at you.
Listen, as much as l enjoy being...
...your personal postal service worker,
it's time you should...
...start forwarding your mail
the old-fashioned way.
Thanks, Jen.
l'll get to that today.
Okay. And this letter came for you...
...which looks kind of official.
lt's from the college, so l thought....
Come on, you wanna play?
Jack, you are on academic probation.
Sure, Jen, you can read my mail.
l have no problem with that.
Sorry, but what happened?
What were your grades?
-l failed a few classes.
-A few?
-l'll make it up.
-When they put you on acade--
Jen! You can play, you can go.
So it's better now, right?
Okay.
Hey, Dawson Leery!
-Oliver, right?
-Like you don't remember. Hey.
So you're here.
You've chosen. Fantastic.
-Thanks for the tip.
-Don't mention it.
Let me fill you in on some
of the basics of our school.
Girl with the braids claims
to have done the nasty with Tarantino.
-Like that's an accomplishment, right?
-l think she heard you.
Now, the guy with the beret,
amazing DP. Picasso with his lighting.
Too bad his ego's
the size of a small country.
Hi. l'm new here.
Now, the guy up here
wrote and directed...
...the worst piece of dreck
to come out of a film school!
You know what? l'll-- l'm just gonna
introduce myself around.
Okay. Hey, whatever floats your boat.
For those of you who were
expecting to hear Nick Drake...
...get with the program.
l've been doing this for weeks.
This is Jen Lindley, and l'm here
to answer questions...
...you may have concerning
matters of the heart...
...or the groin.
Caller number one,
you're on the air.
Jen, hi. Audrey Liddell here.
My question of the day is this:
Why do guys do anything to get your
number but then never use it properly?
Why do they only use it
for a booty call? Footnote...
...where does the term '' booty call''
come from? lf '' booty'' means sex...
...why don't people say,
'' Let's go have booty''?
Oh, l just want to reiterate,
you don't have to use your full name...
...every time you call into the show.
lt's supposed to be confidential.
Well, l have nothing to hide,
sugarplum.
Secondly, your questions
do not have to be relegated...
...to topics of a sexual nature. There is
so much more to life than booty.
There's love and romance
and tenderness.
Done with the public
service announcement?
Here's what happened.
Saturday night...
...I'm wearing
my new Vin Baker boots.
l meet this guy.
Let's just call him Buttface.
l'm gonna stop you right there.
l already know what's wrong.
-You do?
-You are just bathing...
...in negative energy.
You've lost the love.
-l've lost the what?
-The love.
And you should find it,
you should nurture it.
And you should share your laughter
and a warm cup of tea...
...with a man worthy
of loving you in return.
You want me to have tea
with a worthy man?
l don't wanna see you close
the door on possibilities, Audrey.
l wanna see you open up.
-Let the sun shine in.
-Okay.
l'm sorry, l wanted to talk
to Jennifer Lindley.
Caller number two,
you're on the air.
What's up? You wanna play
a little mud football with us?
Can't. Got a lady coming over.
Speaking of which, l heard...
...you had a cute little number
over here. Blond, petite.
That was just Jen the walking buzzkill.
And she's taken, by the way.
You two have another argument?
She came to harass me
about my grades.
l thought you were on the honour roll
back in high school.
l was. l was. But now l'm
on academic probation.
Who says men can't change?
Dude, you're on academic
probation? That's not cool.
No worries.
l'll make it up this term.
Yeah. We can't have our NlBs
failing out the first semester.
That makes us look bad. l'm gonna
have the dean breathing down my neck.
l said l'll make it up, all right?
-You don't have to worry.
-l hope not.
You should study, not play football.
-We got a quiz in Soc.
-l don't see you studying.
That's because l'm not
on academic probation.
-What is this?
-My new script.
Cool. You want me to read it?
Even better.
l want you to direct it.
No, l can't.
l'm not looking for--
No, no, no. Read it.
Then we'll talk.
All right.
Awesome Trapper Keeper.
Thanks.
How do you feel about lndian food?
-Excuse me?
-For Friday.
Some people don't like curry.
l'm not one.
But if you don't enjoy nan,
then really, what's the point?
-You are so odd.
-Am l too odd?
-No. l'll keep you posted.
-You're both late for my class.
-So are you.
-Good point.
-Hello, Elliot.
-Hey, professor.
l'm gonna get going now.
Okay. Bye.
You, wait. l have news
on the Lazare front.
Good news or news that means
l'll be in the files all weekend?
How quickly they turn. We're finished.
Or rather, you're finished.
l plan on benefiting from the fruits
of your hard labour...
...by getting published in an obscure
journal that no one will read.
So, what do you say?
About what?
For an English teacher,
you don't talk too good.
Dinner. Friday night, to celebrate.
-Was that better?
-Much.
Good. lt's gonna be fancy,
so wear your best jeans.
-Not a problem. l'll be there.
-Great.
And now you're officially late
for my class.
What are we gonna do with you,
Joey Potter?
Friday night.
So, you gonna
talk to Oliver today?
-You've been putting it off all week.
-l know. l know.
l mean, is the script really that bad?
No. l don't hate it at all.
There's a lot of good stuff.
-l have a couple ideas to make it better.
-Naturally.
There's no point getting into it
because l'm not gonna direct it.
But l don't see why.
lf the script isn't bad.
Well, it's not my script. l don't know
how to direct somebody else's words.
-l wanna do my own stuff.
-Oh, that's cool.
Do you have some unproduced
material lying around...
...that l haven't heard about?
The point is, l don't wanna direct
anything right now.
A project like that takes over your life.
My life is just starting to feel normal.
l'm not ready to make that kind of
commitment to somebody else's film.
Oh, l see.
l know what you're doing. l've been
in therapy. l know the tricks.
Okay, as the supportive girlfriend,
l am required to tell you...
...when you have that look
in your eyes. And you've got a twinkle.
Maybe that's
because l'm around you.
l contribute to the twinkle,
but l do not take full credit for it.
Dawson, you like the script,
so why don't you just talk to him?
Why don't you just see
what he has to say?
l'll think about it.
Okay, l gotta go. My producer
wants to talk to me before the show.
-Okay. Still on for lunch?
-Absolutely.
Cool.
Come here.
Car-pooling to work was
a mistake. l see that now.
Don't get your panties
all in a bunch.
l'm finished.
Anyway, we can't leave until we
help Joey with her little dilemma.
-What dilemma?
-Nothing.
Joey made two dates
for the same night.
When my eyes bug out like this,
what does that mean in your world?
How very Marcia Brady of you.
So who are the lucky contestants?
Well, behind door number one,
we have Nice Guy.
His name is Elliot, for God's sake.
A sweet young lad,
quite smitten with our Joey.
Cute, funny, wears sweater vests,
the only strike against him yet.
Who's behind door number two?
-Can we not do this?
-The professor.
-The forbidden fruit.
-He's not fruit, he's my teacher.
And it's not a date, it's an academic
group activity with the entire--
Which doesn't mean it couldn't end up
like a date...
...wrapped around each other
like squid.
Oh, beautiful image, Audrey,
but not one that l'm entertaining.
And if l were to cancel
on Elliot tonight...
...it would only be to further
my academic career.
Correct me if l'm wrong...
...but aren't you already ahead
on the academic career?
The only thing you don't have
is a social life.
l have a social life.
What is this? Socializing.
l'm all for you bedding down
with the gorgeous professor.
Oh, yeah, been there,
done that. lt's good.
But l don't think you have the guts...
...which is fine because Nice Guy
has serious boyfriend potential...
...which means there's no reason
not to go out with him. Unless--
-Unless?
-Unless what?
Well, unless you're not ready
for a boyfriend yet.
Oh, why wouldn't l
be ready for a boyfriend?
Boyfriends are
time-consuming things.
And some people think that
they're ready, but they're not.
And it's not just going
to dinner a bunch of times...
-...and getting greasy afterwards.
-lt's not?
No. lt's letting your guard down.
You know, getting past
the small talk...
...and really allowing yourself to
be intimate with somebody new.
-You sure you're ready to do that?
-Yes, 1 00 percent ready.
Okay, great. Then l guess you'll
be going out with Nice Guy tonight.
-Okay, let's go.
-Bye.
-Hey, McPhee.
-Hey.
-So what did l miss?
-Not much.
-We got our quizzes back.
-Oh, yeah? How'd you do?
Oh, nice.
-Nice.
-Yeah. Glad you approve.
Hey, look, l didn't mean
to get all up in your face before.
l was just looking out for you.
You know l got your back.
lt didn't feel like you had my back,
more like you were on it.
You took it wrong, then. Hey,
how about we do it up right tonight...
...you know, celebrate your
accomplishment? What do you say?
Yeah, all right. Sounds good.
-All right?
-Yeah.
Let's go tell the boys.
And whoever checked
out Fear and Desire...
...from the video library,
would they please return it...
...so others can finish their papers?
That's all.
-lt was a gift.
-l'll see you on Monday.
Did you read my script yet?
Oliver. Yeah.
Great.
l have a preliminary shooting
schedule here. lt's flexible.
You know, Oliver, l can't do it.
l'm sorry.
You can't do it? Why?
Hell, you have to do it, Dawson.
You're the only one who can do it.
l'm flattered, but it....
lt's complicated.
What, the story?
lt's supposed to be.
You didn't understand the flashbacks?
Were they not clear?
No, that's not what l meant.
The flashbacks,
l don't think you need.
You're using them as a crutch.
l think you can tell
the story without them.
Was that a note?
Sure.
Do you have notes on my script?
A few, yeah.
All right, let's go.
-Where?
-Lunch.
l've got plans with my girlfriend,
so--
And bring your notes.
All right.
This is completely unbelievable.
Yeah, l know. lf Danny found you
in here, l'd be fired.
How can they think
that l've lost my edge?
l am nothing but edge, Pacey.
l am razor sharp, baby.
And yet here you are eating garnish.
-What's the problem?
-l don't know.
My producer told me that my shows
this week have been terrible...
...and if l don't go back to doing things
the way l was before...
-...they're gonna cancel me.
-Before what?
l don't know before what.
Before...
...me and Dawson.
And the clouds part.
That makes absolutely no sense. l was
miserable then, and l'm happy now.
lt makes sense.
Nobody likes happy people.
lf you had a question,
wouldn't you rather talk to somebody...
...who was in a healthy,
loving relationship?
No. l prefer to get advice from people
more dysfunctional than l am.
-That way l feel good about my life.
-Fine. Fine. Okay.
lf that's what they want. lf they want me
to be nasty and sarcastic, l can do that.
l just need something
that's gonna take me there.
-Pacey, say something disgusting.
-Sure.
Would you prefer sexist
or just downright vulgar?
Hold that thought.
Hello.
Hello, my little pumpkin.
Oh, you are so fired.
Hey! l was wondering
if 7:00 is too early.
l know we said 7:30, but l was afraid
we might miss the movie.
Actually, Elliot, l was--
l was just about to call you.
ls everything okay?
Everything's fine.
l think l might be coming down
with something.
And l wanted to wait
and see how l felt...
...you know, because l really
wanted to go tonight.
Right. Of course.
My-- My throat's all scratchy and....
Well, l don't want you to get sick.
-Well, l don't wanna get you sick.
-Yeah, that too.
So, anyway, l think
it would be better...
...if l stayed home
and went to bed early.
Yeah. That's definitely
the right thing to do.
l'm sorry this is so last-minute.
You couldn't have known
you were gonna get sick, right?
You should get some rest
and drink plenty of fluids.
Maybe we can do it again
some other time or something.
-Absolutely.
-Okay.
Great. Well, feel better.
Bye.
''You're still wearing
a training bra.
Why breast implants may be
the right choice for you.''
Oh, man, l got nothing.
l really like those shoes.
Okay, those aren't mine.
l have lost my edge,
l am about to lose my show...
-...and it's all your fault.
-How, exactly?
Well, because-- Because you made
me happy, and now l'm boring.
l'm happy, and l'm boring.
Are you proud of yourself?
Oh, you look so cute with
that Penthouse on your lap.
-This is serious. This is a problem.
-l got a better problem.
-Oliver wants to have dinner with us.
-You spent all day with him.
l know. l know. But we
haven't really gone over the notes.
We've only got through,
like, half the script.
-Oh, baby, you're gonna do the movie?
-No.
Well, l-- l haven't really
decided yet, but probably not.
Then l don't understand why he
has to come to dinner with us.
He doesn't. Say the word,
l'll tell him to forget about it.
No, it's fine. He can come.
See. l told you she wouldn't mind.
Nice porn.
Oh, okay. You gotta--
Fine, l'll just....
l told him to wait downstairs.
-Turn him loose.
-l--
Starting a little early,
aren't we?
They don't call it happy hour
for nothing.
Cut our boy some slack here.
He's had a little bit
of a rough week, huh?
-He has?
-Academic probation?
Sucks to be you, dude.
l also heard Blossom
ripped you a new one too.
Yeah? Who did you hear that from?
l don't know. Everyone, l guess.
lt's hard to keep a secret
among brothers.
You mean it's hard for you guys
not to talk trash about your friends.
We gotta know where you stand so we
know whether it's cool to take you out.
So it's a conditional brotherhood now?
Oh, yeah. That's good
to know, thanks.
Come on, man, we still like you,
even if you are a little stupid.
We'll just use fewer syllables
around you.
How about that, huh?
Hey, give me another one.
Yeah. So did l...
...leave you guys enough time
for your real Friday night fun?
Oh, you thought when you suggested
dinner at 6:00, that l wouldn't get it?
Yeah. Okay. Go, go. Keggers await.
-Thank you very much.
-Thanks.
You're welcome. And, you, Joey Potter,
where are you off to this fine evening?
Oh, nowhere.
Just back to the dorms.
Oh, well, then you're
walking in my direction.
No, you're wrong.
l finished it in one sitting.
That must mean something.
Yeah. lt means l wrote
a bathroom book.
You'll finish it before you flush.
l'm serious. l thought it was
honest and complex.
Okay, maybe not complex,
but riveting.
l mean, especially the part about
the girl. That-- That was beautiful.
Actually, that's--
That's my favourite part.
Was she based on a real person?
Because l figured out which one of the
guys was you. You're Michael, right?
Yeah. What gave it away? Oh, right.
That would be the bad writing.
lt's not relevant to the story.
How can you say it's not relevant?
lt's why she's afraid to be loved.
lt's back-story. Hello?
You don't need to be hit
over the head with subtext.
-When l read it--
-How can l trust you?
-You don't even like the ending.
-l like it.
l'm not sure it's the best way.
-lt's not the--
-You said you would think about it.
-Thought about it. lt's a bad idea.
-When? l've been with you all day.
Would anybody care to split
a sundae with me? Anybody?
No. lt was just-- lt felt like you.
Sort of dry and self-deprecating.
l liked him. ln the book, l mean.
But the girl, she's not
how l pictured her at all.
-Not how you pictured who?
-Your wife.
l don't have a wife.
You-- l remember you told me
you had a wife and kid.
Did l?
l must have been trying to rationalize
some bad behaviour at the time.
l use the wife and kid bit to get me
out of things l don't wanna do.
You're serious? You just lie?
No, l don't lie.
l create characters.
So, what about the girl in the book?
Or is she just another
made-up character?
No. Sandrine was very real.
Did you love her?
Yes, l did.
Why did you break up?
God. A million reasons.
l don't know.
She was crazy, which is exactly
what you want when you're 21 .
You stop wanting that
as you get older.
What do you want
when you get older?
Coffee. You want coffee.
You wanna get some coffee?
-You won't be open to anything l say.
-l would if you were being open.
l'd be open if l thought
you were right.
Oliver, you're too close to it.
Okay, you know what?
This isn't working.
l'm gonna have to let you go.
Are you--?
Are you firing me?
-lf that's what you really wanna call it.
-You can't fire me.
l never agreed to do your movie
in the--
Can you believe that guy?
So, what about you?
l seem to recall a certain story
about a certain boy.
What happened there?
Nothing. He met someone else.
Or re-met her, as the case may be.
Anyway, it's over. We're over.
-l'm sorry to hear about that.
-What can you do?
Start dating, l guess.
l guess. l mean,
l'm trying to, but....
-But what?
-lt's just hard.
l mean, it takes all this energy
and effort.
You have no way of knowing it's going
to be worth it at the end of the day.
No, you don't.
-What's the point?
-There's none.
You should probably quit,
join a convent.
-You'd look good in a habit.
-Thank you.
You think l'm kidding, but that's
a very appealing notion.
Come on. And give up all those
first crush butterflies? Never.
Yeah. But that's just it.
The butterflies never seem
to accompany the right people.
The nice guys who are right for you
never make your stomach go flip-flop.
So who gives you
flip-flops, Joey Potter?
People who shouldn't.
Well, that hardly seems fair.
Nope. Not fair at all.
Oh, okay. Oh, wow.
l'm gonna go to prison, aren't l?
No, no. lt's okay. l think we can leave
the Feds out of this one.
l think l may have even been
an accomplice.
-You were? Okay. Thank God.
-But l should go.
-Yeah, Great idea. Let's go.
-Maybe l should go first.
Yes, you should go,
and then l'll go later...
...to my house.
And you'll go to your house.
-Dorm.
-Dorm. Right.
-And l'll go to my house.
-Okay.
-Good night, professor.
-Good night.
You see, McPhee...
...if you walk the line
between partying and studying...
...maintain the balance,
it's all good.
Oh, gee, Blossom, your concern
for my well-being...
...is so touching,
l think l'm gonna cry.
What's the problem? l thought
we were having a nice time.
We are, man.
We're best buds, right?
Until l slip up and do something to
embarrass the mighty Sigma Epsilon.
-Like fail a couple of classes.
-l don't know what you're talking about.
You only care how my troubles
affect the house.
-Damn straight.
-That's how it's gonna be now?
That's how it's always been.
The house comes first.
-What, you didn't get that?
-l guess not.
Don't go getting all emotional on me,
your eyes welling up and whatnot.
Man, its like talking to a chick.
That's a good one, man.
You wanna say that to my face, huh?
-Step back, man.
-Jack, hey, he's just messing with you.
Are you gonna take his side too,
Eric?
-Are you all gonna side with him?
-Can l get you a cup of coffee?
l can't believe l never realized
what a jackass you are.
You have been a disappointment
all around.
-Yeah? How's that?
-You were supposed...
...to clean up our image. You've done
nothing but make it worse.
lt wasn't even worth
bringing you into the house.
Hey, hey, hey!
Hey, all right.
Hey, break it up.
-Hey, hey, hey!
-Guys!
Get off me, Pacey!
Come here.
Damn it!
Let's go, guys.
Oh, my God.
Take a seat right now.
Audrey, put some pressure
on it, okay?
-Oh, my God.
-Okay.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
So l've been thinking
about last night.
l think l could have handled it better.
-Yeah?
-Yeah.
Poor Oliver.
The guy was really upset.
Granted, he's obnoxious.
Well, that's an understatement.
He's got a really unique voice, and
he's very passionate about the script...
...which is a good thing, you know?
lt's how l would be.
Actually, he kind of reminds me of me a
little bit. Remember how l used to be?
When l was doing the Brooks movie
and the one before that.
-And the one before that.
-Yeah.
lt's made me realize, l think l am ready
to direct somebody else's words.
You know, l've done my own thing
enough times.
l think this would be an entirely
new challenge for me.
l think l should apologize to him.
Are you mad at me?
Well, congratulations to you.
l've been pissed off at you
since last night.
-You have?
-Yes. You totally ditch me...
...for our lunch date, then you invite
him along to have dinner with us...
...which infringes on our personal time,
which is precious, right?
lt absolutely is.
You let that loudmouthed weasel treat
me like l'm a piece of arm candy.
You don't listen to a single thing
l have to say.
l am right about that first sex scene
being totally gratuitous.
lt is an excuse for Oliver to look
at a pair of boobs in the flesh.
Why don't you give him $20
and tell him to get a lap dance?
Jen, l'm so sorry.
Oh, my God, it's back!
l gotta go.
What's back?
l forgive you.
l did it, Joey. l am a yogi master.
l am centred, l am balanced.
Nothing can penetrate
my inner source of calm.
Audrey, l kissed Wilder last night
and just dumped Nice Guy.
Okay. That wasn't fair.
Me and Elliot weren't really going out,
so it wasn't a dump.
-But l did give him back his NyQuil.
-Let's rewind here to the kiss.
What happened, and was there
tongue involved?
Well, we kissed, l pulled away,
end of story.
Every other girl probably
would've slept with him.
-You wanted to sleep with him?
-No.
l don't know, l.... But l just--
l didn't want to stop kissing him.
So why did you?
Because l freaked out.
l got scared like l always do.
-Okay. That happens.
-Yeah, but, Audrey, l'm sick of it.
l mean, l came to Worthington
to change my life...
...and to become a different person.
And what happened?
My stupid life followed me here.
Yeah, that was an unfortunate turn
of events.
And l'm trapped.
l mean, l can't quite wipe
the slate clean...
...because if l pretend
to be somebody new...
...everybody already knows me here.
Why do you have to be
somebody new?
lf you weren't you,
we might not be friends.
Yeah, but....
-Well, good point.
-Think about this, Joey.
These opportunities that
keep presenting themselves...
...are presenting themselves to you,
not to me, not to anybody else.
And all you have to do
is just seize them.
Stop wasting your time wishing
that you were somebody else...
...and just grab hold of what
you have coming to you...
...because you never know when
it's gonna come your way again.
So how good of a kisser was he?
Like, scale of one to 1 0.
Twenty.
Oh, he's so cute.
Yeah, it was good.
l shouldn't have stopped.
So your boyfriend will break up
with you...
-...if you don't wear thong underwear.
-That's about it, yeah.
lt seems to me you have two options.
You can either dump him or dump him.
Hello, guys, word to the wise.
Before you force your girlfriend
into a thong...
...try putting a piece of floss...
...between your butt cheeks and see
how you like it. Caller number three.
What's this?
Part of what l owe you
for the damages.
Just, you know, let me know
how much it all is...
...and l'll get it to you
as soon as l can.
You could've got me fired
last night, Jack.
So do you wanna talk to me about it?
About what?
About whatever it is that's making
you do this to yourself, man.
What exactly am l doing
to myself, Pacey?
Well, for starters, you're
flunking yourself out of school.
Talk to me all you like
about make-up exams.
l'm the king of make-up exams.
You can tell me the whole thing's crap,
and you don't care.
l'm not gonna buy that,
not from you.
l know how hard you worked
to get yourself into college.
l know that it must terrify you
to be on academic probation...
...and it terrifies you because you
don't know how you got to this point.
All you were doing was cutting loose,
having fun.
l understand that.
l've been there. l know what it's like.
What do you want from me?!
Nothing.
l'm just curious.
l'm just curious. From my perspective,
you're flunking out of school...
...and drinking like you got
a death wish...
...so you can hang out with guys
who attacked you last night.
-They didn't attack me last night.
-They didn't attack you?
Jack, it was 1 0 on one in there.
And they left you here bleeding,
just in case you forgot.
So l'm just curious, is it worth it?
Are they worth it?
l gotta go.
Hey, Oliver, can l talk to you?
l just wanted to tell you l think you
might be right about that one scene.
-There is some pivotal information--
-l cut it out.
Well, good because
you don't need it.
Look, l'm sorry.
l went a little overboard yesterday.
l think part of me is trying
to sabotage the whole thing.
-lt worked.
-You gotta understand...
...l wasn't looking to get involved
in anything.
l wanted to coast for myself
for a while...
...reacquaint myself
with the world slowly.
And then you threw your script at me...
...and l really liked it.
l got excited,
and l didn't wanna get excited.
l was kind of trying to feel
as little as possible.
Probably doesn't
make any sense to you--
Oh, that makes total sense.
You were afraid that the upswing of
throwing ourselves into a new project...
...would inevitably produce a
downswing when we finished it, right?
And hey, man, you're probably
tired of feeling down.
-l am.
-Plus the guilt...
...that comes with doing something...
...that might make you feel good when
you should be dealing with this--
This huge thing.
You know what, Dawson...
...l can't guarantee you that none
of those things will happen.
But if you kind of coast through life
not feeling anything good...
...just so you don't have to feel
anything bad...
...that's no way to live.
l really wanna direct your film.
Okay.
-Thank you.
-You're welcome!
-Look, l have one question, though.
-Shoot.
Why aren't you directing it?
Yeah. That's part of what
l wanted to tell you.
-You know the part of Gage?
-The lead?
Yeah. l wanna play him.
Oliver. Hey.
All right.
Subtitles by
SDl Media Group
-Stop? Okay.
-Okay, there we go. No peeking.
-l'm not peeking, trust me.
Cheaters never prosper.
-Okay.
-Curve to the right.
-This way?
-Curve to the right.
This way? Okay.
Now we're coming--
Sorry.
-That's okay.
-lt was the door.
-There's a chair. Sit down in the chair.
-Sit in the chair.
Okay, all right.
Open your eyes.
For the hands on the eyes game
to work...
-...the present has to be on the table.
-To criticize the method...
...in which the presents are presented
means you will never get presents.
You're very pretty.
All right.
Since it is your big day, and we missed
the requisite back-to-school shopping--
You mean, like the sale at Old Navy?
Right, because
nothing smells more...
...like the first day of school
than cheap fleece.
But l was thinking more along the lines
of the basics. First, number 2 pencils.
A classic.
Pencil sharpener.
Loose-leaf binder paper.
Reinforcement tabbies
for loose-leaf binder paper.
lmpressive. Very thorough.
Pens.
Erasers.
Erasers.
And a ruler.
No math at film school,
but l appreciate the thought.
And finally,
la pi?ce de la r?sistance.
Oh, my God.
l really wanted to
get some Reese's Pieces...
...so l could put them in
the plastic pencil holder...
-...but l felt like it would be too much.
-Nice show of restraint.
Thank you, Jen.
So are you a little nervous?
No, not at all.
lt's three classes, you know?
Nothing too overwhelming,
which is key.
Yeah, that's good.
You're just gonna ease right into it...
...that rigorous college schedule
of napping and drinking.
That's the plan.
What time is your show?
Hey, it's really soon is what it is.
l should actually finish getting ready.
Will you meet me later for lunch?
l would love to.
Baby, l gotta go.
-Okay.
-Okay.
Wait, baby.
Baby. You forgot
your Trapper Keeper.
An oversight on my part.
Couldn't wanna leave
the house without this.
-Thank you.
-Bye-bye.
Have a good day at school, sweetie.
He's so cute.
Admit it, it's one step above
a Jackie Collins novel.
All smut and no substance.
l didn't realize you were so familiar
with Jackie's work.
l mean, don't be
ashamed or anything.
Don't go changing the subject,
doing your little hair-flippy thing...
...trying to distract me.
l'm wise to your ways, Potter.
l'm sorry.
What were you talking about again?
l want you to admit the only reason...
...you like Professor Wilder's book
is because you think he's cute.
Well, l can't,
because that's not true.
lt's obvious the only reason
you don't like his book...
...is you think it's affecting
your mojo with the ladies.
That shows how little you know me.
l have no mojo to speak of.
l think you have a little.
So can l ask you a question?
You can.
Okay, on Friday night,
unless you're busy--
And l know it's only Monday, but
sometimes people, like, make plans...
-...for trips or something kind of early--
-Elliot?
Would you maybe wanna see something
or eat something?
With me?
Are you asking me to dinner
and a movie?
Kind of. But dinner and a movie
just sounded so date, you know.
And this way, you know,
it sounded much better...
...to me, in my mind.
l would love to eat and see
something with you on Friday.
Really?
Am l interrupting?
Are there naked people in here?
-No.
-Oh, bummer.
Well, well, well, looking swanky.
Do l detect some product in your hair?
Are we moussing?
You know, that's my cue,
so l'll see you in class.
-l'll be there.
-Bye, Audrey.
Someone's got a boyfriend.
Audrey, your elementary school
methods of taunting...
-...aren't gonna work this time.
-Who's got a boyfriend? Joey does!
Tickle me one more time,
l swear l will bite you.
Seriously, Joey, what's going on
with you and Nice Guy?
ls he, like, your steady or what?
His name is Elliot, first of all.
He's not my boyfriend.
l have no boyfriend.
And we're just...
...getting to know each other.
But you like him.
What's not to like? He's a--
-Nice guy.
-Nice guy.
Bye.
Yeah.
Why do l feel like all the boys
are looking at me?
Well, because all the boys
are looking at you.
Listen, as much as l enjoy being...
...your personal postal service worker,
it's time you should...
...start forwarding your mail
the old-fashioned way.
Thanks, Jen.
l'll get to that today.
Okay. And this letter came for you...
...which looks kind of official.
lt's from the college, so l thought....
Come on, you wanna play?
Jack, you are on academic probation.
Sure, Jen, you can read my mail.
l have no problem with that.
Sorry, but what happened?
What were your grades?
-l failed a few classes.
-A few?
-l'll make it up.
-When they put you on acade--
Jen! You can play, you can go.
So it's better now, right?
Okay.
Hey, Dawson Leery!
-Oliver, right?
-Like you don't remember. Hey.
So you're here.
You've chosen. Fantastic.
-Thanks for the tip.
-Don't mention it.
Let me fill you in on some
of the basics of our school.
Girl with the braids claims
to have done the nasty with Tarantino.
-Like that's an accomplishment, right?
-l think she heard you.
Now, the guy with the beret,
amazing DP. Picasso with his lighting.
Too bad his ego's
the size of a small country.
Hi. l'm new here.
Now, the guy up here
wrote and directed...
...the worst piece of dreck
to come out of a film school!
You know what? l'll-- l'm just gonna
introduce myself around.
Okay. Hey, whatever floats your boat.
For those of you who were
expecting to hear Nick Drake...
...get with the program.
l've been doing this for weeks.
This is Jen Lindley, and l'm here
to answer questions...
...you may have concerning
matters of the heart...
...or the groin.
Caller number one,
you're on the air.
Jen, hi. Audrey Liddell here.
My question of the day is this:
Why do guys do anything to get your
number but then never use it properly?
Why do they only use it
for a booty call? Footnote...
...where does the term '' booty call''
come from? lf '' booty'' means sex...
...why don't people say,
'' Let's go have booty''?
Oh, l just want to reiterate,
you don't have to use your full name...
...every time you call into the show.
lt's supposed to be confidential.
Well, l have nothing to hide,
sugarplum.
Secondly, your questions
do not have to be relegated...
...to topics of a sexual nature. There is
so much more to life than booty.
There's love and romance
and tenderness.
Done with the public
service announcement?
Here's what happened.
Saturday night...
...I'm wearing
my new Vin Baker boots.
l meet this guy.
Let's just call him Buttface.
l'm gonna stop you right there.
l already know what's wrong.
-You do?
-You are just bathing...
...in negative energy.
You've lost the love.
-l've lost the what?
-The love.
And you should find it,
you should nurture it.
And you should share your laughter
and a warm cup of tea...
...with a man worthy
of loving you in return.
You want me to have tea
with a worthy man?
l don't wanna see you close
the door on possibilities, Audrey.
l wanna see you open up.
-Let the sun shine in.
-Okay.
l'm sorry, l wanted to talk
to Jennifer Lindley.
Caller number two,
you're on the air.
What's up? You wanna play
a little mud football with us?
Can't. Got a lady coming over.
Speaking of which, l heard...
...you had a cute little number
over here. Blond, petite.
That was just Jen the walking buzzkill.
And she's taken, by the way.
You two have another argument?
She came to harass me
about my grades.
l thought you were on the honour roll
back in high school.
l was. l was. But now l'm
on academic probation.
Who says men can't change?
Dude, you're on academic
probation? That's not cool.
No worries.
l'll make it up this term.
Yeah. We can't have our NlBs
failing out the first semester.
That makes us look bad. l'm gonna
have the dean breathing down my neck.
l said l'll make it up, all right?
-You don't have to worry.
-l hope not.
You should study, not play football.
-We got a quiz in Soc.
-l don't see you studying.
That's because l'm not
on academic probation.
-What is this?
-My new script.
Cool. You want me to read it?
Even better.
l want you to direct it.
No, l can't.
l'm not looking for--
No, no, no. Read it.
Then we'll talk.
All right.
Awesome Trapper Keeper.
Thanks.
How do you feel about lndian food?
-Excuse me?
-For Friday.
Some people don't like curry.
l'm not one.
But if you don't enjoy nan,
then really, what's the point?
-You are so odd.
-Am l too odd?
-No. l'll keep you posted.
-You're both late for my class.
-So are you.
-Good point.
-Hello, Elliot.
-Hey, professor.
l'm gonna get going now.
Okay. Bye.
You, wait. l have news
on the Lazare front.
Good news or news that means
l'll be in the files all weekend?
How quickly they turn. We're finished.
Or rather, you're finished.
l plan on benefiting from the fruits
of your hard labour...
...by getting published in an obscure
journal that no one will read.
So, what do you say?
About what?
For an English teacher,
you don't talk too good.
Dinner. Friday night, to celebrate.
-Was that better?
-Much.
Good. lt's gonna be fancy,
so wear your best jeans.
-Not a problem. l'll be there.
-Great.
And now you're officially late
for my class.
What are we gonna do with you,
Joey Potter?
Friday night.
So, you gonna
talk to Oliver today?
-You've been putting it off all week.
-l know. l know.
l mean, is the script really that bad?
No. l don't hate it at all.
There's a lot of good stuff.
-l have a couple ideas to make it better.
-Naturally.
There's no point getting into it
because l'm not gonna direct it.
But l don't see why.
lf the script isn't bad.
Well, it's not my script. l don't know
how to direct somebody else's words.
-l wanna do my own stuff.
-Oh, that's cool.
Do you have some unproduced
material lying around...
...that l haven't heard about?
The point is, l don't wanna direct
anything right now.
A project like that takes over your life.
My life is just starting to feel normal.
l'm not ready to make that kind of
commitment to somebody else's film.
Oh, l see.
l know what you're doing. l've been
in therapy. l know the tricks.
Okay, as the supportive girlfriend,
l am required to tell you...
...when you have that look
in your eyes. And you've got a twinkle.
Maybe that's
because l'm around you.
l contribute to the twinkle,
but l do not take full credit for it.
Dawson, you like the script,
so why don't you just talk to him?
Why don't you just see
what he has to say?
l'll think about it.
Okay, l gotta go. My producer
wants to talk to me before the show.
-Okay. Still on for lunch?
-Absolutely.
Cool.
Come here.
Car-pooling to work was
a mistake. l see that now.
Don't get your panties
all in a bunch.
l'm finished.
Anyway, we can't leave until we
help Joey with her little dilemma.
-What dilemma?
-Nothing.
Joey made two dates
for the same night.
When my eyes bug out like this,
what does that mean in your world?
How very Marcia Brady of you.
So who are the lucky contestants?
Well, behind door number one,
we have Nice Guy.
His name is Elliot, for God's sake.
A sweet young lad,
quite smitten with our Joey.
Cute, funny, wears sweater vests,
the only strike against him yet.
Who's behind door number two?
-Can we not do this?
-The professor.
-The forbidden fruit.
-He's not fruit, he's my teacher.
And it's not a date, it's an academic
group activity with the entire--
Which doesn't mean it couldn't end up
like a date...
...wrapped around each other
like squid.
Oh, beautiful image, Audrey,
but not one that l'm entertaining.
And if l were to cancel
on Elliot tonight...
...it would only be to further
my academic career.
Correct me if l'm wrong...
...but aren't you already ahead
on the academic career?
The only thing you don't have
is a social life.
l have a social life.
What is this? Socializing.
l'm all for you bedding down
with the gorgeous professor.
Oh, yeah, been there,
done that. lt's good.
But l don't think you have the guts...
...which is fine because Nice Guy
has serious boyfriend potential...
...which means there's no reason
not to go out with him. Unless--
-Unless?
-Unless what?
Well, unless you're not ready
for a boyfriend yet.
Oh, why wouldn't l
be ready for a boyfriend?
Boyfriends are
time-consuming things.
And some people think that
they're ready, but they're not.
And it's not just going
to dinner a bunch of times...
-...and getting greasy afterwards.
-lt's not?
No. lt's letting your guard down.
You know, getting past
the small talk...
...and really allowing yourself to
be intimate with somebody new.
-You sure you're ready to do that?
-Yes, 1 00 percent ready.
Okay, great. Then l guess you'll
be going out with Nice Guy tonight.
-Okay, let's go.
-Bye.
-Hey, McPhee.
-Hey.
-So what did l miss?
-Not much.
-We got our quizzes back.
-Oh, yeah? How'd you do?
Oh, nice.
-Nice.
-Yeah. Glad you approve.
Hey, look, l didn't mean
to get all up in your face before.
l was just looking out for you.
You know l got your back.
lt didn't feel like you had my back,
more like you were on it.
You took it wrong, then. Hey,
how about we do it up right tonight...
...you know, celebrate your
accomplishment? What do you say?
Yeah, all right. Sounds good.
-All right?
-Yeah.
Let's go tell the boys.
And whoever checked
out Fear and Desire...
...from the video library,
would they please return it...
...so others can finish their papers?
That's all.
-lt was a gift.
-l'll see you on Monday.
Did you read my script yet?
Oliver. Yeah.
Great.
l have a preliminary shooting
schedule here. lt's flexible.
You know, Oliver, l can't do it.
l'm sorry.
You can't do it? Why?
Hell, you have to do it, Dawson.
You're the only one who can do it.
l'm flattered, but it....
lt's complicated.
What, the story?
lt's supposed to be.
You didn't understand the flashbacks?
Were they not clear?
No, that's not what l meant.
The flashbacks,
l don't think you need.
You're using them as a crutch.
l think you can tell
the story without them.
Was that a note?
Sure.
Do you have notes on my script?
A few, yeah.
All right, let's go.
-Where?
-Lunch.
l've got plans with my girlfriend,
so--
And bring your notes.
All right.
This is completely unbelievable.
Yeah, l know. lf Danny found you
in here, l'd be fired.
How can they think
that l've lost my edge?
l am nothing but edge, Pacey.
l am razor sharp, baby.
And yet here you are eating garnish.
-What's the problem?
-l don't know.
My producer told me that my shows
this week have been terrible...
...and if l don't go back to doing things
the way l was before...
-...they're gonna cancel me.
-Before what?
l don't know before what.
Before...
...me and Dawson.
And the clouds part.
That makes absolutely no sense. l was
miserable then, and l'm happy now.
lt makes sense.
Nobody likes happy people.
lf you had a question,
wouldn't you rather talk to somebody...
...who was in a healthy,
loving relationship?
No. l prefer to get advice from people
more dysfunctional than l am.
-That way l feel good about my life.
-Fine. Fine. Okay.
lf that's what they want. lf they want me
to be nasty and sarcastic, l can do that.
l just need something
that's gonna take me there.
-Pacey, say something disgusting.
-Sure.
Would you prefer sexist
or just downright vulgar?
Hold that thought.
Hello.
Hello, my little pumpkin.
Oh, you are so fired.
Hey! l was wondering
if 7:00 is too early.
l know we said 7:30, but l was afraid
we might miss the movie.
Actually, Elliot, l was--
l was just about to call you.
ls everything okay?
Everything's fine.
l think l might be coming down
with something.
And l wanted to wait
and see how l felt...
...you know, because l really
wanted to go tonight.
Right. Of course.
My-- My throat's all scratchy and....
Well, l don't want you to get sick.
-Well, l don't wanna get you sick.
-Yeah, that too.
So, anyway, l think
it would be better...
...if l stayed home
and went to bed early.
Yeah. That's definitely
the right thing to do.
l'm sorry this is so last-minute.
You couldn't have known
you were gonna get sick, right?
You should get some rest
and drink plenty of fluids.
Maybe we can do it again
some other time or something.
-Absolutely.
-Okay.
Great. Well, feel better.
Bye.
''You're still wearing
a training bra.
Why breast implants may be
the right choice for you.''
Oh, man, l got nothing.
l really like those shoes.
Okay, those aren't mine.
l have lost my edge,
l am about to lose my show...
-...and it's all your fault.
-How, exactly?
Well, because-- Because you made
me happy, and now l'm boring.
l'm happy, and l'm boring.
Are you proud of yourself?
Oh, you look so cute with
that Penthouse on your lap.
-This is serious. This is a problem.
-l got a better problem.
-Oliver wants to have dinner with us.
-You spent all day with him.
l know. l know. But we
haven't really gone over the notes.
We've only got through,
like, half the script.
-Oh, baby, you're gonna do the movie?
-No.
Well, l-- l haven't really
decided yet, but probably not.
Then l don't understand why he
has to come to dinner with us.
He doesn't. Say the word,
l'll tell him to forget about it.
No, it's fine. He can come.
See. l told you she wouldn't mind.
Nice porn.
Oh, okay. You gotta--
Fine, l'll just....
l told him to wait downstairs.
-Turn him loose.
-l--
Starting a little early,
aren't we?
They don't call it happy hour
for nothing.
Cut our boy some slack here.
He's had a little bit
of a rough week, huh?
-He has?
-Academic probation?
Sucks to be you, dude.
l also heard Blossom
ripped you a new one too.
Yeah? Who did you hear that from?
l don't know. Everyone, l guess.
lt's hard to keep a secret
among brothers.
You mean it's hard for you guys
not to talk trash about your friends.
We gotta know where you stand so we
know whether it's cool to take you out.
So it's a conditional brotherhood now?
Oh, yeah. That's good
to know, thanks.
Come on, man, we still like you,
even if you are a little stupid.
We'll just use fewer syllables
around you.
How about that, huh?
Hey, give me another one.
Yeah. So did l...
...leave you guys enough time
for your real Friday night fun?
Oh, you thought when you suggested
dinner at 6:00, that l wouldn't get it?
Yeah. Okay. Go, go. Keggers await.
-Thank you very much.
-Thanks.
You're welcome. And, you, Joey Potter,
where are you off to this fine evening?
Oh, nowhere.
Just back to the dorms.
Oh, well, then you're
walking in my direction.
No, you're wrong.
l finished it in one sitting.
That must mean something.
Yeah. lt means l wrote
a bathroom book.
You'll finish it before you flush.
l'm serious. l thought it was
honest and complex.
Okay, maybe not complex,
but riveting.
l mean, especially the part about
the girl. That-- That was beautiful.
Actually, that's--
That's my favourite part.
Was she based on a real person?
Because l figured out which one of the
guys was you. You're Michael, right?
Yeah. What gave it away? Oh, right.
That would be the bad writing.
lt's not relevant to the story.
How can you say it's not relevant?
lt's why she's afraid to be loved.
lt's back-story. Hello?
You don't need to be hit
over the head with subtext.
-When l read it--
-How can l trust you?
-You don't even like the ending.
-l like it.
l'm not sure it's the best way.
-lt's not the--
-You said you would think about it.
-Thought about it. lt's a bad idea.
-When? l've been with you all day.
Would anybody care to split
a sundae with me? Anybody?
No. lt was just-- lt felt like you.
Sort of dry and self-deprecating.
l liked him. ln the book, l mean.
But the girl, she's not
how l pictured her at all.
-Not how you pictured who?
-Your wife.
l don't have a wife.
You-- l remember you told me
you had a wife and kid.
Did l?
l must have been trying to rationalize
some bad behaviour at the time.
l use the wife and kid bit to get me
out of things l don't wanna do.
You're serious? You just lie?
No, l don't lie.
l create characters.
So, what about the girl in the book?
Or is she just another
made-up character?
No. Sandrine was very real.
Did you love her?
Yes, l did.
Why did you break up?
God. A million reasons.
l don't know.
She was crazy, which is exactly
what you want when you're 21 .
You stop wanting that
as you get older.
What do you want
when you get older?
Coffee. You want coffee.
You wanna get some coffee?
-You won't be open to anything l say.
-l would if you were being open.
l'd be open if l thought
you were right.
Oliver, you're too close to it.
Okay, you know what?
This isn't working.
l'm gonna have to let you go.
Are you--?
Are you firing me?
-lf that's what you really wanna call it.
-You can't fire me.
l never agreed to do your movie
in the--
Can you believe that guy?
So, what about you?
l seem to recall a certain story
about a certain boy.
What happened there?
Nothing. He met someone else.
Or re-met her, as the case may be.
Anyway, it's over. We're over.
-l'm sorry to hear about that.
-What can you do?
Start dating, l guess.
l guess. l mean,
l'm trying to, but....
-But what?
-lt's just hard.
l mean, it takes all this energy
and effort.
You have no way of knowing it's going
to be worth it at the end of the day.
No, you don't.
-What's the point?
-There's none.
You should probably quit,
join a convent.
-You'd look good in a habit.
-Thank you.
You think l'm kidding, but that's
a very appealing notion.
Come on. And give up all those
first crush butterflies? Never.
Yeah. But that's just it.
The butterflies never seem
to accompany the right people.
The nice guys who are right for you
never make your stomach go flip-flop.
So who gives you
flip-flops, Joey Potter?
People who shouldn't.
Well, that hardly seems fair.
Nope. Not fair at all.
Oh, okay. Oh, wow.
l'm gonna go to prison, aren't l?
No, no. lt's okay. l think we can leave
the Feds out of this one.
l think l may have even been
an accomplice.
-You were? Okay. Thank God.
-But l should go.
-Yeah, Great idea. Let's go.
-Maybe l should go first.
Yes, you should go,
and then l'll go later...
...to my house.
And you'll go to your house.
-Dorm.
-Dorm. Right.
-And l'll go to my house.
-Okay.
-Good night, professor.
-Good night.
You see, McPhee...
...if you walk the line
between partying and studying...
...maintain the balance,
it's all good.
Oh, gee, Blossom, your concern
for my well-being...
...is so touching,
l think l'm gonna cry.
What's the problem? l thought
we were having a nice time.
We are, man.
We're best buds, right?
Until l slip up and do something to
embarrass the mighty Sigma Epsilon.
-Like fail a couple of classes.
-l don't know what you're talking about.
You only care how my troubles
affect the house.
-Damn straight.
-That's how it's gonna be now?
That's how it's always been.
The house comes first.
-What, you didn't get that?
-l guess not.
Don't go getting all emotional on me,
your eyes welling up and whatnot.
Man, its like talking to a chick.
That's a good one, man.
You wanna say that to my face, huh?
-Step back, man.
-Jack, hey, he's just messing with you.
Are you gonna take his side too,
Eric?
-Are you all gonna side with him?
-Can l get you a cup of coffee?
l can't believe l never realized
what a jackass you are.
You have been a disappointment
all around.
-Yeah? How's that?
-You were supposed...
...to clean up our image. You've done
nothing but make it worse.
lt wasn't even worth
bringing you into the house.
Hey, hey, hey!
Hey, all right.
Hey, break it up.
-Hey, hey, hey!
-Guys!
Get off me, Pacey!
Come here.
Damn it!
Let's go, guys.
Oh, my God.
Take a seat right now.
Audrey, put some pressure
on it, okay?
-Oh, my God.
-Okay.
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
So l've been thinking
about last night.
l think l could have handled it better.
-Yeah?
-Yeah.
Poor Oliver.
The guy was really upset.
Granted, he's obnoxious.
Well, that's an understatement.
He's got a really unique voice, and
he's very passionate about the script...
...which is a good thing, you know?
lt's how l would be.
Actually, he kind of reminds me of me a
little bit. Remember how l used to be?
When l was doing the Brooks movie
and the one before that.
-And the one before that.
-Yeah.
lt's made me realize, l think l am ready
to direct somebody else's words.
You know, l've done my own thing
enough times.
l think this would be an entirely
new challenge for me.
l think l should apologize to him.
Are you mad at me?
Well, congratulations to you.
l've been pissed off at you
since last night.
-You have?
-Yes. You totally ditch me...
...for our lunch date, then you invite
him along to have dinner with us...
...which infringes on our personal time,
which is precious, right?
lt absolutely is.
You let that loudmouthed weasel treat
me like l'm a piece of arm candy.
You don't listen to a single thing
l have to say.
l am right about that first sex scene
being totally gratuitous.
lt is an excuse for Oliver to look
at a pair of boobs in the flesh.
Why don't you give him $20
and tell him to get a lap dance?
Jen, l'm so sorry.
Oh, my God, it's back!
l gotta go.
What's back?
l forgive you.
l did it, Joey. l am a yogi master.
l am centred, l am balanced.
Nothing can penetrate
my inner source of calm.
Audrey, l kissed Wilder last night
and just dumped Nice Guy.
Okay. That wasn't fair.
Me and Elliot weren't really going out,
so it wasn't a dump.
-But l did give him back his NyQuil.
-Let's rewind here to the kiss.
What happened, and was there
tongue involved?
Well, we kissed, l pulled away,
end of story.
Every other girl probably
would've slept with him.
-You wanted to sleep with him?
-No.
l don't know, l.... But l just--
l didn't want to stop kissing him.
So why did you?
Because l freaked out.
l got scared like l always do.
-Okay. That happens.
-Yeah, but, Audrey, l'm sick of it.
l mean, l came to Worthington
to change my life...
...and to become a different person.
And what happened?
My stupid life followed me here.
Yeah, that was an unfortunate turn
of events.
And l'm trapped.
l mean, l can't quite wipe
the slate clean...
...because if l pretend
to be somebody new...
...everybody already knows me here.
Why do you have to be
somebody new?
lf you weren't you,
we might not be friends.
Yeah, but....
-Well, good point.
-Think about this, Joey.
These opportunities that
keep presenting themselves...
...are presenting themselves to you,
not to me, not to anybody else.
And all you have to do
is just seize them.
Stop wasting your time wishing
that you were somebody else...
...and just grab hold of what
you have coming to you...
...because you never know when
it's gonna come your way again.
So how good of a kisser was he?
Like, scale of one to 1 0.
Twenty.
Oh, he's so cute.
Yeah, it was good.
l shouldn't have stopped.
So your boyfriend will break up
with you...
-...if you don't wear thong underwear.
-That's about it, yeah.
lt seems to me you have two options.
You can either dump him or dump him.
Hello, guys, word to the wise.
Before you force your girlfriend
into a thong...
...try putting a piece of floss...
...between your butt cheeks and see
how you like it. Caller number three.
What's this?
Part of what l owe you
for the damages.
Just, you know, let me know
how much it all is...
...and l'll get it to you
as soon as l can.
You could've got me fired
last night, Jack.
So do you wanna talk to me about it?
About what?
About whatever it is that's making
you do this to yourself, man.
What exactly am l doing
to myself, Pacey?
Well, for starters, you're
flunking yourself out of school.
Talk to me all you like
about make-up exams.
l'm the king of make-up exams.
You can tell me the whole thing's crap,
and you don't care.
l'm not gonna buy that,
not from you.
l know how hard you worked
to get yourself into college.
l know that it must terrify you
to be on academic probation...
...and it terrifies you because you
don't know how you got to this point.
All you were doing was cutting loose,
having fun.
l understand that.
l've been there. l know what it's like.
What do you want from me?!
Nothing.
l'm just curious.
l'm just curious. From my perspective,
you're flunking out of school...
...and drinking like you got
a death wish...
...so you can hang out with guys
who attacked you last night.
-They didn't attack me last night.
-They didn't attack you?
Jack, it was 1 0 on one in there.
And they left you here bleeding,
just in case you forgot.
So l'm just curious, is it worth it?
Are they worth it?
l gotta go.
Hey, Oliver, can l talk to you?
l just wanted to tell you l think you
might be right about that one scene.
-There is some pivotal information--
-l cut it out.
Well, good because
you don't need it.
Look, l'm sorry.
l went a little overboard yesterday.
l think part of me is trying
to sabotage the whole thing.
-lt worked.
-You gotta understand...
...l wasn't looking to get involved
in anything.
l wanted to coast for myself
for a while...
...reacquaint myself
with the world slowly.
And then you threw your script at me...
...and l really liked it.
l got excited,
and l didn't wanna get excited.
l was kind of trying to feel
as little as possible.
Probably doesn't
make any sense to you--
Oh, that makes total sense.
You were afraid that the upswing of
throwing ourselves into a new project...
...would inevitably produce a
downswing when we finished it, right?
And hey, man, you're probably
tired of feeling down.
-l am.
-Plus the guilt...
...that comes with doing something...
...that might make you feel good when
you should be dealing with this--
This huge thing.
You know what, Dawson...
...l can't guarantee you that none
of those things will happen.
But if you kind of coast through life
not feeling anything good...
...just so you don't have to feel
anything bad...
...that's no way to live.
l really wanna direct your film.
Okay.
-Thank you.
-You're welcome!
-Look, l have one question, though.
-Shoot.
Why aren't you directing it?
Yeah. That's part of what
l wanted to tell you.
-You know the part of Gage?
-The lead?
Yeah. l wanna play him.
Oliver. Hey.
All right.
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