David Jason: Planes, Trains & Automobiles (2019–…): Season 1, Episode 4 - Episode #1.4 - full transcript

'I'm David Jason

'and I'm on a journey
to discover the machines

'that made America
and changed the world.'

- Know you are mad?
- All the best people are!

'I'm travelling by plane, train,
and automobile in the footsteps

'of pioneers and inventors
down the West Coast of America.'

TYRES SCREECH
Look at you! Yes!

I really, really enjoyed that.

'I will take in some of the best
all-American scenery...'

Good Lord. Look at that!
That is just wonderful!

'..and reveal how this part
of the world has led'



'the way in adventure
and enterprise.'

Look where she's going!

'I will discover the stories

'behind some of the world's
most legendary machines.'

You're responsible for
the nation's treasure.

Exactly.

Come along, James. Off we go.

'At last,
Del Boy makes it to Hollywood.'

You don't get much closer than that.

'Join me on my big
American adventure.

'I'm on a 1,200 mile adventure
from Seattle to Los Angeles.

'It's the penultimate week
of my five-week journey

'and I'm heading south from San
Francisco down the Pacific Coast,

'riding east through
the Santa Ynez Valley



'and motoring into the middle
of them Mojave Desert.'

TOOTS HORN

'Along the way, I'll be huffing
and puffing aboard a vintage loco.'

- Yours is a good old-fashioned...
- 1913 rocket ship.

1913 rocket ship! I love it.

'I'll be rattling the desert rocks
in a Porsche-powered dune buggy.'

- This is still only second gear.
- We're going much faster than that!

'And I'm going ballistic
with my very own big boy rocket.'

Bleeding hell!

'First, though, I'm motoring down
one of America's coolest

'and most curvaceous of coast roads.

HE IMITATES DEL BOY
'That is the Specific Ocean.

'You know, saying no more.'

'This is the legendary
California State Route One.

'One of the most breathtaking drives
in the entire US.

'And you will notice I'm
travelling in quite some style.'

This is the life.

I am driving a 1966 Ford Mustang.

When I was a lad, this would
have been the bee's knees.

You would have been lusting
after this.

'I've come to the Wild West town
of Santa Ynez...'

Here we are. Wagons Ho!

'..to discover how Americans got
about way before cars even existed.'

Here it is, Historical Museum
And Carriage House.

BULLETS RICOCHET

HE DRAWLS
If I'd have known that,

I would have had my six guns on you.

Like the hell I am.

HE SPEAKS NORMALLY
Cor, dear! This is it isn't it, eh?

'This unique collection charts
the heyday of horse-drawn travel

'and tells a story of how America's
West became a little less wild.'

- Ah, John. Hi.
- That's right, David.

Nice to meet you.

'Former film producer John Copeland
is on hand to show me the reins.'

I was just looking at all
the carriages and things

and it's a great history
of the American West isn't it, this?

Well, it is, and it's the biggest
collection of carriages

and Stagecoaches
west of the Mississippi.

Good Lord.

And each one of them
has a story to tell.

DAVID: These are the ones
we all recognised in every western

that we've ever seen.

Was that the sort of bus of its day?

It was actually the equivalent of
a jetliner today.

This was how people traversed our
nation before the railroads went in.

'And just like today you don't go on
the road without a driving lesson.'

And this is an actual real device.

This is how people learned
how to drive.

I'm sitting in the middle,
is that right?

That's it.

For a single horse,
you would have these two.

You if you want him to stop
you pull back.

- You do. You pull back.
- But if I want him to go...

DAVID CLICKS TONGUE
Whack him on the back.

Go on, my son. Right.
Easy peasy, isn't it?

Had my first lesson.
Come on, then. Off we go.

HE CLICKS TONGUE
Very good.

Yeah. We haven't moved yet.
JOHN LAUGHS

'And now
I'm ready for the real thing.

'And just to make me
look a right plonker,

'the producers made me
go the full John Wayne.'

Well, cushty.

HE DRAWLS
Come on, John, let's get going.

'John's hitching me up
with Tommy Harris,

'a legendary wrangler
and a rodeo star

'who's dedicated his life to keeping
the Wild West alive.'

- Here are the horses, I do believe.
- They can't see us.

So just stay there because they've
got what are called blinders.

They are for to concentrate

the horse's attention
ahead of them, is it?

Well, it is but it also makes them
less distracted

by something happening off
to the side.

See the coach that you're going to
be riding on and driving.

Yeah. How many could ride in here?
In the old days?

- Well, they could get 12 in here.
- Twelve! I can't believe that!

This was, you know,
the height of transportation,

and it was certainly faster than
walking behind a covered wagon.

So people would be
thrilled to ride on this.

So, David, shall we take a little
trip back in time?

'Tommy's carefully crafted this
working replica 1820s stagecoach

'to show history in motion,
and I'm about to take a test drive.'

You cannot have 12 in here!

Oh, yes.

So here we are. Pretty comfy.

Well, it is at the moment.
It's not moving.

If you think flying in an aircraft
today is crowded,

it's nothing like being inside
a stagecoach.

'Despite the cramped quarters,

'stagecoach travel was decidedly
for the well-heeled

'and the Transcontinental 2,000-mile
journey didn't come cheap.'

If you were going from St
Louis to San Francisco,

that would be close to, you know,

7,500-10,000
in today's money.

10,000 to be cramped
in a bleeding thing like this

is even tighter than your coffin,
this thing.

Exactly.

MAN SHOUTS COMMANDS

- DAVID: Oops. Here we go.
- Away we go.

This is not too bad. Thank you,
gentlemen. Thank you very much.

Yes. Seems like nice boys,
don't they?

Oh, bloody hell!

I mean, you don't have to go far,
do you, to already experience...

Yeah.

..that this isn't
the most comfortable ride

that you've ever had in your life.

Yeah. Would you like to do
12 hours of this?

Because that's pretty much
what the day would be.

God, it's like a nightmare,
isn't it?

They didn't know the comforts
that we know today.

No.

'The huge distances covered
crossing America

'meant passengers would be cooped up
for days on end.'

To come from St Louis
to San Francisco was close to 20.

- What? Days.
- Yeah.

And, you know, they're sweaty,
they're not taking a bath.

- Probably not brushing their teeth.
- No.

Yeah, being inside here could be
quite a sensory experience.

A bit like being with a film crew
really, isn't it?

Right. Yeah, a little bit.

'Now, a stagecoach journey
was one you did in stages.

'To travel right across America
could take three weeks

'with horses being swapped
for fresh teams at relay stations

'every 15 miles or so.

'You'd easily use 36 horses
a day to cover the ground.'

So, this is the speed
that we would travel at?

The average speed
would be about 7 mph.

Oh, yeah. This is the way to travel,
there is no other.

I mean, this is it.
JOHN LAUGHS

How about if you have done this
from Seattle down?

- Yes.
- Almost 2,000 miles.

The old Technicolor yawn.

We would've all been doing that,
wouldn't we?

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

'The old buns have taken
a bit of a battering

'so John's keen to get me
upstairs riding shotgun.'

HORSES GRUNT AND NEIGH SOFTLY

- I'm never going to get up there.
- Sure you are.

- David, step on the hub.
- Which foot?

Whatever works for you.
Hold on to that. There you go.

Good.

Swing on in next to Tommy.

Thank you, Tom.

There you go, sir.
You're in the game.

Go ahead. Are you ready?
DAVID LAUGHS

I thought he was being serious!

HORSE WHINNIES

What do you think
of riding on the on the top side

as opposed to inside?

I think it's slightly better up top.

Oh, yeah.

Obviously not so claustrophobic,
but for some reason I'm not

feeling the bumps quite so much.

This was the ideal seat, right here.

Why is that?

The leather thorough braces
that are holding the body,

you'll feel them more on the inside
than you will up here.

'Of course, back in the 1800s,
travel didn't come without risk.

'A coach full of wealthy passengers

'might make a tasty target
for a hold-up.'

So, David, on an uphill like this

where the horses
are slowing down a little bit,

this would be where the road agents
would want to try to stop the stage.

That's where the robbers would
come into play.

TOM WHISTLES
Bobby, Tuck. Come on.

TOM WHISTLES REPEATEDLY

'Often braving terrible weather,

'rutted roads
and treacherous terrain,

'for half a century the stagecoach
lines carried aspiring citizens

'ever westward, earning their
rightful place in American history.'

TOM WHISTLES

JOHN: He knows how to drive.

DAVID: Yes, siree, bub.

It was much better
riding up here with Tom

and feeling and seeing
the whole thing,

but when we went off the road,

oh, dear, I thought we were all
going to bounce off.

- Great experience.
- Thank you, sir, very much.

Thank you, Tom. Bless you, sir.
Thank you, sir.

'All I need to do now is work out
how to get off this blinking thing.

'I'm continuing my journey
through sunny California

'and this morning I'm visiting
the historic downtown of Fillmore,

'a city about 50 miles north
of Los Angeles.'

HORN TOOTS

'Back in 1886,
during a Railroad Revolution,

'the Southern Pacific Company
ran a track through the valley here

'and Fillmore was one of hundreds
of new towns that blossomed

'with the arrival of steam power.'

Now, that's more like a steam
engine, that, innit?

HORN SOUNDS

Bit like me, big and butch.

Big and butch! Heh!

Sorry.

First steam.
You are going to love it!

'Today, I'm meeting some people

'wedded to keeping Fillmore's
rail history alive.

'Tresa Wilkinson,

'clearly the brains
of the operation.'

- Hi.
- Hello, Tresa.

How long have you been
on front office?

- Twenty-five years.
- Oh, is that all?

- That's all.
- You're a new girl, then.

Yes, I'm a new girl on the block!
THEY LAUGH

'The Fillmore and Western Railway
chiefly supplies rolling stock

'for Hollywood movies and TV dramas.

'But this morning they're running
a special train ride

'for tourists like me.'

DAVID: Tresa, what did you think
when your husband said

he wanted to buy a railway?

I was in the shower and he came in
and told me, says, "Guess what?"

I said, "What?" He goes,
"I bought a railroad!"

It's like, "You're kidding me."

And, you know, you can't just get
out the shower go chase him down

because, you know,
you're in the buff.

And then he took off.

HE LAUGHS
Her got in the car and left.

And knew that
you couldn't chase him!

No, I couldn't chase him down.

'I'm not sure if husband Dave
is still in hiding,

'so I'm off to hunt him down.'

DAVE: Roll call!

All aboard!

- Dave. Bless you.
- Welcome aboard!

'Ah! Found him,
and it looks like he's reserved

'the best seat
in the house for himself.'

You can get in the here
and get away from the wife.

- She's my best friend. OK?
- Good.

Except you when you told her
about the railway

when she was in the shower.
You did a runner.

Well, I knew for a fact
that she's a very modest person

and she wasn't going to chase me
across the front yard in the nude.

HORN TOOTS

'We'll be riding the track
from Fillmore

'to the town of Santa Paula,
a mere ten miles.'

'But I'm in caboose class,

'with the added option of alfresco,
no less.'

- Hey, this is it.
- This is it.

What a good idea of yours.

Yeah. Great. This is...

There's my lovely wife.

- There she is.
- There's Tresa.

- Yeah.
- Bye, babes.

We're at 30 miles long.

Well, that's a good decent amateur
railway for a grown-up.

And it also has four of its existing
stations on the railroad.

So we have a lot of history.

Where did all this come from?
All this passion with railways.

Did you have a little rail track
when you were a kid?

DAVE CHUCKLES
It's been a lifelong infection.

No, I had trains when I was a kid.

I grew up with trains,
I've always loved trains.

'This line was built just 17 years
after the completion

'of America's first transcontinental
railway in 1869.'

HORN TOOTS

'Up to ten miles of new track
was being laid down in a single day,

'and people streamed into California
in their thousands.

'This region,
the Santa Clara River Valley,

'thrived and became famed
across the globe

'for its juicy oranges
and zesty lemons.'

DAVE: This valley used to be

one of the biggest
navel orange producers in the world.

Really?

And I have records of them hauling

up to 110 cars of oranges a day

in packing system.
- Good Lord!

And that's a tremendous
amount of fruit.

'Back in the day this elegant
1920s Santa Fe caboose

'would have been a home from home
for the train's hardworking staff.

'Must've been a tough gig, eh?'

HORN TOOTS

- Here we are, Steve.
- All right.

Well done. Thank you.

Glad you enjoyed your ride.
Welcome to Santa Paula.

Santa Paula. Here I come.

'We've reached the end of the line
and I'm off for a closer gander

'at the beautiful 1913 Baldwin
engine that pulled us here.

'Dave tells me he discovered
this machine in bits

'and restored it
at a cost of 3 million.

'As a builder of model steam
engines myself,

'I want to make sure that
the young punks driving the thing

'know their big ends
from their blast hose.'

Where is the pressure?

175 lb.

- And what does she run at?
- 175 lb.

How do we know
how much water we've got?

Here's the water dial.

We're full.
So, yours is a good old-fashioned...

1913 rocket ship.

1913 rocket ship! I love it.

- All right, let's go.
- All right.

Hey there, Steve, I'm ready to...

'These boys give
a very good impression

'of knowing what they're doing.

'Anyway,
time for a three-point turn,

'or at least the train equivalent.

HORN TOOTS SOFTLY

DAVID: Outside, it's really hot,

and once you get in here,
it's even hotter.

So this is
their working temperature.

I would want a couple of big fans
with a fridge up here,

blowing some cold air.

'In order to get us back to base,
our old loco needs to move

'to the rear and reverse
all the way home.'

DAVID:
One of the attractions to steam

is it's a living breathing machine.

They make a noise, they breathe,
they move, they...

HORN SOUNDS
They blast at you.

So, it's a love affair that
I can understand, I think.

RHYTHMIC CHUGGING

You can hear it.
You can feel it, can't you?

'It's a pretty labour intensive
business,

'running a historic railway
like this.

'Dave and Tresa
employ about 40 people

'just to keep the whole
shebang going.'

HORN TOOTS

'But everyone seems to be
sharing in their passion

'and having a darn good time
while they're about it.'

All aboard, Charlie.

'Tell you what though,
she's a thirsty old trout.

'Now we need a quick pit stop
to fill her up.

'A small matter of piping
6,000 gallons of finest

'Californian chateau del
aqua into the tank.

'As we head back, I feel slightly
envious of old Dave

'chugging up and down
through the orange groves

'here in his fancy caboose.

'Not a bad life, eh?'

I like it. Lovely jubbly.

Thank you so much.

It's been a marvellous time,

playing on your own little grown-up
steam train. Thank you.

Thank you very much
for coming along,

and I hope you had a great time
on the Fillmore and Western.

'I'm continuing my journey
on the road

'known as
the main street of America.

'For just over 100 years,

'this ribbon of tarmac
has connected Chicago to LA.

'2,500 miles.

'Part of the fabric and history
of this awe inspiring country.

'And today I've arrived at the place
where Hollywood magic begins.'

Look at this.
This is my idea of heaven, this.

Look at it. Look at it.

I wish I could take that home.
I'd restore that.

Good Lord.

It's wonderful, isn't it?

As far as the eye can see,
virtually, cars.

And they seem to be all Volkswagens.

'Now, since leaving Seattle,
I've been on the lookout

'for some old American number plates
as a souvenir of my trip.

'Wonder if I might be able
to pick up some here.'

Look at this Volkswagen.
Its front's gone.

Anybody in?
HE KNOCKS

I think you've lost in front of your
vehicle. Did you know that?

'But this isn't just
any old car graveyard.

'I've come to meet an old-timer
called Willie Kalajian.

'These wrecks represent
his life's work

'in the buggy building
and movie transport business.'

Willie's been building
dune buggies for years

and one of the things about Willie,

he's very, very well known
in the film business.

And if anybody wants to do anything
with dune buggies

or go into the desert or whatever,
Willie is your man.

And he's been doing it
for an awful long time.

So, he's the sort of expert
around here.

So, I want to have a chat with him
and perhaps, who knows,

take his dune buggy
out for a ride.

'Recently Willie was diagnosed
with kidney disease

'so he's been a bit poorly of late.'

Good afternoon.

You must be the famous Willie I've
been looking forward to meeting.

I don't know where the famous
comes from. I'm Willie.

What made you move here for a start?
Look, it's the desert, isn't it?

My backyard. I jump on a bug
and I go up here in these hills.

I can travel hundreds of miles
without seeing anybody.

'As a young jobbing VW mechanic
back in the '60s,

'Willie quickly realised

'that spare parts
from the vehicles he was fixing

'could be turned into fun
and fashionable dune buggies.'

How did you get started?

A friend of mine went to Acapulco
and saw these dune buggies

and he wanted one
so we bought a Volkswagen,

cut it up, turned it down,
made a buggy out of it.

Why did you choose a Volkswagen?

- They were very cheap.
- Ah! Good answer.

There were plenty of them.

The most popular vehicle
in the world.

'Over the years, racing and riding
the desert dunes became both

'a successful business
and part of family life.'

What does it feel like, then, to go
in this area and dune buggy

where nobody else has been?

What's the pleasure in that?

Freedom.

Doesn't it get rather lonely
out there?

No, you usually take friends
with you.

It's also helpful when something
breaks down

you've got somebody to help.

'Today, Willie's son Greg
is looking after the shop.'

Ah! There you are.

- Hi, David.
- Hi, Greg.

- Nice to see you.
- Pleasure.

So, just talk me through it.

Here we have, somehow, a chassis
or the base of a Volkswagen.

Is that right?

Correct. This was a VW bug
at one point in time.

And basically when you take
the steel body off of the VW,

remove all that weight,

the suspension can handle
quite a bit of off-roading.

And they're very versatile vehicles.

So, with all this motor vehicles
and equipment,

when did you first
learn to drive then?

I first was riding on my dad's lap
when I was five or six.

But when I actually started driving
on myself, I was eight years old.

The first vehicle on the left
is a Porsche-powered 2.8 liter

fuel injected with power steering
and everything.

'The family went on to develop these
bigger and far more powerful buggies

'specifically to transport
movie-makers in and out

'of remote desert locations.'

These cars were set up by us
specifically for doing film work,

for carrying camera gear,
for carrying personnel.

This isn't stuff you typically find.

Most of these cars you'd see
don't have the exterior rail.

So when you're dealing with soft
sand you're loading camera kit,

it's hard to reach
all the way up.

So we had these actually put on so
you could load camera boxes

and anything else
onto the roof of the car.

How many have you got?
For the film industry.

Well, we have three of these cars.

But we've got 22 cars
we can have out

- within a little bit of time.
- Good lord!

The last feature we did
was a feature with Will Ferrell

called Land Of The Lost

and that show,
we had 22 cars working on it.

Blimey.

'I can't wait to get in one of these
mean machines

'and have a spin in the desert.

'But first Greg's...

DAVID DRAWLS
'Gotta get loaded up.'

Blimey, if that's the way he drives,
I don't think I'll bother.

These cars weigh about 1,100 lb.

Yeah, I used to do that.

I gave it all up to, you know,

let somebody else do it now.

It's because you've got a bring
other people up to lift things.

I... 1,100? I did 1,100 easy.

HE GRUNTS

'We're heading a bit further
down Route 66 to a place

'where Willie started racing
his beloved buggies

'over 50 years ago.

''This is Slash X Ranch,

'and today, it's become
a pretty popular meeting place

'for weekend warriors,

'who tip up here to pose, party,
and throw up a lot of dirt.

Remind me not to get one
of these, will you?

'From here, they'll head out
for a blast round the sands

'in their 40,000 desert toys.

'Greg's in gear and it's time for us
to buckle into our buggy.'

- Cor, blimey! Yeah. Tight fit.
- Snug as a bug in a rug.

You'd think we're going...
gonna fly this thing.

- Occasionally I have flown it.
- You have? What?

ENGINE STARTS

'Cor, blimey!

'They've stuck me with
a real life Mad Max.

'Never mind flying,
I was expecting a gentle glide

'down some silky soft sand dunes.'

Cor, blimey!
That was a roller-coaster,

wasn't it? Up and down.

'Greg's bespoke buggy is powered
by a 2.8 l Porsche race engine

'and is capable of a staggering
off road speed of 100 mph.'

This is still only second gear.

Blimey. We're going much faster
than that!

Blimey, it's worse than
being on steed, isn't it?

Yeah.

'I'm in serious danger
of losing me lunch here.

'They never told me
I would be going out with a lunatic.

'I thought it was a nice
day out in California.

'This is madness.

'Despite the amazing travel
of air ride suspension,

'I'm feeling a bit like James Bond,
both shaken and stirred.

Greg. Let's just slow down a bit.

I think you blew my bloody hat off!

That was barely getting
into fourth gear.

Yeah, it's all right for you.

You're used to it. I couldn't see!

Bloody knocking the eyes
out of my head!

'Finally,
we're out in the deep desert

'and the solitude of this wonderful
landscape quite overwhelms me.'

I was talking to Willie and I
could understand what he said,

something about when he used to
drive these things and to come out

in the middle of here
and just nobody about.

GREG: The serenity of it all.

DAVID: Yeah, something very,
very moving about it all, I find.

And after the noise of this thing,

um,

I can understand Willie's
love of being quiet.

GREG: Yeah.

'As we head back,
Greg puts me in charge.

'It's my very first time
behind the wheel

'of a souped up buggy like this.

'And I kind of hope
it may be my last.'

You know you are mad, don't you?

You bet. All the best people are.

THEY LAUGH

Don't ask me if I enjoyed it.

I've been on the big dipper,
most places around the world.

I've been to Blackpool,
I've been everywhere,

that beats the lot of them.

As you've probably witnessed.

'Dear old Willie has
followed us out here

'and has a little surprise
lined up for me.'

- Guess what?
- Oh!

- That's what it was.
- Oh, great.

Oh! Just what I wanted. Thanks.
My Californian number plate.

This was a special one to come
off of my son's personal car.

DAVID: Greg's! Now, look at that.

- It's called...
- Fifteen years ago.

- Bugnus.
- Bug in us. It's our bug in us.

You're just bug in us.

- Is that it?
- Been that way my whole life.

- He's a pro.
- Well, He's a pro.

- Thank you very much, Greg.
- Pleasure's been mine, sir.

Thank you. And you, sir.

All right. Thanks, Greg.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

'It's an early morning start
and I'm heading miles out

'into the middle of the barren
but majestic Mojave Desert.

'And, boy,
does it feel distinctly isolated!

'Like a galaxy far, far away.

Well, there's a notice there.'

It says, "Restricted area
authorised personnel only."

All I know is it's private property.

We're not allowed in.

It's going to be interesting when we
get to wherever it is we're going.

'I've heard about strange
installations like this

'right out in the middle
of the great American nowhere.'

It looks a bit like a military base.

'All a bit mysterious.

'Could be the kind of place
you get abducted by aliens.'

All right.

Let's go and find out
what this is all about.

- Hi, David.
- Hello.

Welcome to Friends of
Amateur Rocketry here.

Is that where we are?

'I'm told this is one of only two
places in California

'where non-military folk are
permitted to experiment

'with rocket science.

'Attracting impoverished students
and wealthy entrepreneurs alike,

'it's a hidden desert
oasis of innovation

'where the future superstars
of space exploration

'find out what works
and what doesn't.'

RICK ON PA: Three, two, one...

'Our mission controller today,

'Rick Maschek,
is a lifelong enthusiast

'who mentors rocketeers
from across the United States

'and the operation is backed

'by some pretty impressive
links to industry.'

Actually, SpaceX, sort of,
got their start out here.

Did they?

Mr Musk flew out here and told
some of the people out here,

"I have 200 million.

"I need somebody
to build me some rockets."

And so that's kind of how
SpaceX got their start.

Yeah. What got you involved
into the rocket business?

When I was a kid, I loved dinosaurs
and I loved volcanoes.

Then when they launched Apollo 11
to the moon

I saw that thing and I thought,
"I want to be an astronaut."

And so I got rid of my dinosaur toys
and I started doing rocket stuff,

but I still love rockets.
- Yeah

'These students have travelled
thousands of miles,

'all the way from Ohio,
and this is their big day.'

OK, that's a solid rocket.
These are two high school students.

- So let's walk out with them.
- Yeah.

'If successful, they'll shoot this
hunk of metal up to 30,000 ft,

'the height of a jetliner.

'But Rick says he's launched rockets
to twice that height from here.'

We're out here and this is actually
a military airspace that we use.

Bring it toward me slowly.
Slow down.

And so we don't have airliners
flying over us in this location.

'Rather than a liquid fuel,

'the Ohio team's rocket
is using a solid propellant,

'making it much safer to handle.'

This motor is just like same fuel
and everything,

just like the space shuttle,
the tubes,

- solid boosters on the side.
- Yeah.

This is where we have to be
very safe

because we're putting
the igniter in now.

'This is the dangerous bit.

'If the fuel were to ignite now
it would be curtains for all of us.

'Time to retreat to safety,
I think.'

OK, we're going to be launching
a rocket here

in about a minute or two.

So you need to stop
what you're doing.

You have to stay inside
the bunker for safety.

I'm checking the airspace right now.

If anybody sees or hears
anything, let me know.

'Mmm. Sometimes rocket science
requires good old common sense.'

We're going to be
launching here in five,

four, three, two, one.

Bleeding 'ell!

'Great launch! But the rocket veers
wildly off course.

'Disaster.'

RJ, looks like we have some
separation.

Please stay by the bunkers.

'A fin has blown off
and the debris is in danger

'of raining down on top of us.'

- DAVID: It's coming down.
- We've got some pieces coming down.

DAVID: Oh, no!

'Sadly, failure is an important part
of success in this game,

'but the students here
will undoubtedly

'keep reaching for the stars.

'And now it's my turn.

'I'll let you into a secret.

'I absolutely love rockets and I've
made quite a few in my time,

'although nothing of the scale
that Rick and I are about to build.'

This is essentially the rocket fuel
that we're going to use. It's solid.

It's made with sugar and a type
of salt that provides the oxygen.

- This is the rocket.
- This is the rocket itself.

Fuel goes in the end. That much I do
know because I do it myself.

That goes in the end.
So, this is the motor.

So, I'm going to have you
just take this

and just slide it right in there.

'Once these so-called
rocket candy is loaded

'we have what's known in the trade
as a motor.

'That's the bit which ignites

'and provides all the thrust
for the rocket.

'And this sweet stuff should
shove us up to a good 3,000 feet.'

And Newton's third law of motion,

for every action you have a...
- Equal and opposite reaction.

Reaction,
and that's the rocket going up.

- See?
- The gases shoot down one way.

- Go the other.
- The rocket goes the other way.

'Next, we load in some simple
electronics to record the altitude

'and trigger the landing parachutes.

'The idea is to re-use these rockets
as much as possible.

Three, two, one.
PARACHUTE POPS

All this for 30 seconds. I mean...
RICK CHUCKLES

You've got to be slightly doolally.

Guess what?
This rocket is ready to go.

All right. I trust you.
Thousands wouldn't.

Be careful.

To the launch pad!

Are they always this heavy?

RICK: OK.

'We're getting
a bit sandblasted out here.

'I want to make sure this giant
firework stays on course.'

DAVID: We're going into wind.

So, the angle of the dangle
is inversely proportional

to the heat of the meat,
so I reckon... about 45 degrees.

Are you going to go a mile
or two out there to get it?

All right, listen,
Mr Noddy Know-all,

what are you going to suggest?
- Like, straight up.

I like the way they get
a Knight Of The Realm

to do all the hard work.

RICK CHUCKLES

I reckon that is it.

Go up, ping, and it'll bring it down
right in front of the bunkers.

Next time you see NASA, Elon Musk,
SpaceX launch a rocket,

you tell them!

You say, "Hey, I think the angle
needs to be left."

I will.

- Let's go push this button.
- Come on.

I'll do the countdown and you can do
the honours of pushing the button.

Well, I should do so.
I mean, I built it.

RICK LAUGHS
The honour's all yours.

We're going in ten, nine,
eight, seven, six,

five, four, three, two, one.

DAVID: There she goes.

'Wow! Mission success.

'Straight up, a good 4,000 ft.'

RICK: We have parachutes.

And looks like David was right.

We're going to have a walk
for about a mile or more.

I told you so.

He wouldn't listen, would he?

RICK LAUGHS

'Ah, well. Let's have another
look at my contribution

'to the British space effort.

'It's one small step for man,

'one giant leap
for dear old Blighty.'

- Thank you.
- Thanks for your help launching it.

- You're welcome.
- Well, we did it!

Nice launch.

'Just as I predicted,

'my skyrocket ditched a good way off
down the Mojave Desert.

'Well, I guess I'd better go
and pick the bleeding thing up.

'I may be a while.

'Join me next time
for the final part of my journey.

'I learn stunt driving
from the best in the business.

- Look at you! Yes! Woo!
- Yes!

'Cruise down to the beach
in a genuine 1930s roadster.

'And get a brilliant bird's eye view
of the City of Angels.'

Back in the day, they would give you
a lot on the beach

because nobody wanted to live there.

- God, dear, really?
- Yeah.