Darkwing Duck (1991–1992): Season 1, Episode 56 - The Haunting of Mr. Banana Brain - full transcript
♪ DARING DUCK OF MYSTERY ♪
♪ CHAMPION OF RIGHT ♪
♪ SWOOPS OUT OF
THE SHADOWS ♪
♪ DARKWING OF THE NIGHT ♪
♪ SOMEWHERE SOME
VILLAIN SCHEMES ♪
♪ BUT HIS NUMBER'S UP ♪
3, 2, 1!
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
♪ WHEN THERE'S TROUBLE
YOU CALL D.W. ♪
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
LET'S GET DANGEROUS.
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
DARKWING, DARKWING DUCK!
♪ A CLOUD OF SMOKE
AND HE APPEARS ♪
♪ THE MASTER OF SURPRISE ♪
♪ WHO'S THAT CUNNING
MIND BEHIND ♪
♪ THE SHADOWY DISGUISE ♪
♪ NOBODY KNOWS FOR SURE ♪
♪ THE BAD GUYS ARE
OUT OF LUCK ♪
♪ HERE COMES ♪
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
LOOK OUT!
♪ WHEN THERE'S TROUBLE
YOU CALL D.W. ♪
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
LET'S GET DANGEROUS!
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
♪ YOU BETTER WATCH OUT,
YOU BAD BOYS ♪
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪♪
THERE ARE 1,000 STORIES
IN ST. CANARD.
SOME ARE MUNDANE,
SOME EXOTIC,
SOME STRANGER THAN OTHERS,
BUT ONE THING
REMAINS THE SAME--
I'M IN ALL THE GOOD ONES.
I COULD USE A
GOOD STORY.
GOSALYN!
SHOULDN'T YOU
BE HOME...
IN BED?
COULDN'T SLEEP.
AW, DAD...
TELL ME A STORY.
IT'LL HELP ME RELAX.
OH, SINCE IT IS
EDUCATIONAL.
THIS STORY IS A TALE
OF COURAGE AND DERRING-DO.
I CALL IT...
I WANT TO RELAX,
NOT GO COMATOSE.
HOW ABOUT SOMETHING
MORE INTERESTING,
LIKE...
ISN'T THAT
TOO INTERESTING?
[GULP]
YES, THAT WAS ONE
OF MY
F-F-FAVORITE CASES.
I DON'T KNOW
WHY YOU'RE UPSET
ABOUT A HAUNTED
JACK-IN-THE-BOX!
IT STARTED WHEN
MY CHEAPSKATE DAD
COPPED OUT ON A TRIP
TO WHIRLING WATER WORLD
AND TOOK US TO
THE MUSEUM INSTEAD.
DO YOU KNOW WHAT
ADMISSION PRICES ARE?
YOU SHOULD
BE HAPPY.
YOU LOVE TOYS!
WHAT TOYS?
THEY'RE RELICS!
THIS DOESN'T EVEN
HAVE BATTERIES.
LOOK WITH
YOUR EYES ONLY.
I DON'T NEED YOU
BREAKING THESE ANTIQUES.
IT'S BAD ENOUGH
WE HAVE TO WORRY
ABOUT QUACKERJACK
STEALING THEM.
[DARKWING] AHEM.
I KNEW HE WAS THERE
THE WHOLE TIME.
[GOSALYN] DAD WASN'T
TAKING TIME OUT
FROM CRIME-FIGHTING
TO HAVE ANY FUN.
WHOA--A FIRST EDITION
ELECTROZAPPER
JOY BUZZER!
PERFECT!
[LAUNCHPAD] ISN'T THIS
WHERE THE TROUBLE STARTED?
I WAS TRYING
TO GET DAD
TO LIGHTEN UP.
HUH?
WHAT?
OOH! YES, YES!
GEE, THAT WASN'T
VERY NICE.
OH, DAD LOVES A GOOD
PRACTICAL JOKE!
PRACTICAL JOKES!
YES!
RELAX, DAD!
I'LL GET YOU DOWN!
OH-WHOA-WHOA-WHOA
WHOA-WHOA-WHOA-WHOA
WHOA-WHOA-WHOA-WHOA
WHOA-WHOA-WHOA-WHOA!
OOPS.
WELL, I GOT HIM DOWN.
MAMA!
MAMA!
OH, TASTY!
YUM YUM YUM YUM!
AREN'T YOU TOO BIG
TO PLAY WITH DOLLS?
AAH!
[BUZZ]
GOSALYN,
I DO NOT APPRECIATE
BEING EMBARRASSED!
I WANTED
TO DIVERT YOU.
YOU SHOULD
HAVE SOME FUN!
LET'S PLAY
VIDEO GAMES.
VIDEO GAMES?
YOU'RE LEAVING
TO PLAY VIDEO GAMES?
THAT SORT OF TALK
DROVE ME FROM
THE TOY BUSINESS
TO THE LOONEY BIN!
YEP!
THIS GUY'S NUTTIER
THAN A BAG
OF CASHEWS,
AND IT'S PLAYTIME!
OOH...WHO'S THIS?
WHO'S THIS?
HOLD IT RIGHT THERE,
QUACKERJACK!
TENNIS, ANYONE?
I'D ASK YOU TO PLAY,
BUT YOU'RE
ALL TIED UP!
WHERE'S A PHONE BOOTH
WHEN YOU NEED ONE?
HAVING ABALL,
ARE WE?
[GIGGLING]
SIMPLY SCRUMPTIOUS!
[LAUNCHPAD] THIS CASE WAS
FUNNIER THAN I REMEMBERED!
[GOSALYN] YEAH!
DAD WAS PRETTY GOOFY!
I PROTECTED
MY SECRET IDENTITY
AND THREW HIM
OFF GUARD.
YEAH, RIGHT.
WE CAN SKIP
THE NEXT PART.
YOU WILL NOT!
THIS IS WHERE I TROUNCE
THAT LOONEY QUACKERJACK!
[GOSALYN]
YEAH. DAD DID HIS,
"I AM THE YO-YO THAT
KEEPS COMING BACK" STUFF.
[DARKWING]
WAIT! WAIT! WAIT!
WHY SO FAST?
[LAUNCHPAD]
NICE CURVE BALL, D.W.
[DARKWING]
WOULD YOU PLEASE
STOP GOING SO FAST?
SLOW DOWN!
SLOW DOWN!
[GOSALYN] O.K.
NOT HERE!
[CHOMP]
AAH!
OH, GOODY, GOODY,
GOODY, GOODY, GOODY!
[GOSALYN] THIS IS WHEN
IT GOT REALLY WEIRD.
[LAUNCHPAD] AREN'T YOU
RELAXED NOW, GOS?
THE THING IN THE BOX
SEEMED TO FEED OFF
EVERY MEAN-SPIRITED JOKE.
YOU'RE MISSING
A GREAT RERUN OF
PELICAN'S ISLAND.
IT WAS GETTING STRONGER...
YOU WON'T STOP.
AND STRONGER, UNTIL...
HERE'S
A CHILDHOOD FAVORITE--
WACKY PUTTY,
FOR THAT EXTRA STICKY FUN!
WHAT HIT ME?
SEE YA
ON THE PLAYGROUND!
HA HA HA HA!
GET THIS STUFF
OFF OF ME!
I'M TRYING!
[CROWD LAUGHING]
DARKWING'S A RIOT!
YOU AND THE DOLL GUY
SHOULD TEAM UP
FOR A STOOGE ACT!
[LAUGHTER]
YOU'RE KILLING THEM,
D.W.!
MAYBE YOU SHOULD
CONSIDER SHOWBIZ!
I'LL DO THAT.
[GOSALYN] QUACKERJACK
THOUGHT HE WAS SAFE...
BUT HE WAS WRONG!
SO THAT'S WHY
IT WAS CHAINED.
OHH, IT'S BROKEN!
WELL, I SHOULD WORK
ON MY OWN TOYS.
THEY'RE MUCH BETTER.
MMM...YES!
FREE AT LAST!
OOH, YES!
THIS WILL DO NICELY!
QUACKERJACK,
YOU INSANE GENIUS!
YOU'VE CREATED
THE PERFECT DOLL...
TO MAKE LITTLE GIRLS
SCREAM!
IN DELIGHT, OF COURSE.
[GASP]
WILL YOU
PLAY WITH ME?
MR. BANANA BRAIN,
YOUR VOICE HAS CHANGED.
I LIKE IT!
NICE FLYING TRICK,
TOO!
PLEASE PLAY WITH ME.
WELL, JUST NAME
YOUR GAME, PARTNER.
OOH! HOW ABOUT MY GLOBAL
DESTRUCTION BINGO?
PERHAPS YOU'D PREFER MY
DEMOLITION DERBY GAME.
WE COULD USE
OUR NEIGHBOR'S NEW CAR!
WE COULD DO SOMETHING
MUCH MORE FUN.
YEAH.
UH-HUH, UH-HUH.
OOH, YES!
THIS IS PERFECT!
JUST THE PLACE TO TIE ON
THE OLD FEED BAG!
EATING IS ALL
YOU TALK ABOUT!
PIZZA'S BAD FOR
YOUR COMPLEXION.
OH, I DON'T EAT...
PIZZA.
ALLOW ME.
WHAT GOES UP...
AAH!
MUST CAUSE FROWNS.
HA HA HA HA HA!
HMMPH!
BUT--BUT MELINDA!
MMM, DELICIOUS--
THE SWEET HONEY
OF HUMAN SUFFERING.
BOO!
AAH!
HA HA HA HA HA!
LIKE THEY SAY,
"THE APPLE
DOESN'T FALL FAR
FROM THE TREE."
THIS DOLL'S
AS GOOFY AS ME.
[ARF ARF]
[SNARLING]
YAAA!
HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE!
HA HA HA HA!
[CRYING]
HA HA HA HA!
WHEN DO I GET
TO HAVE FUN?
WELL,
HOW ABOUT NOW?
YOU'RE FINALLY TAKING ME
TO A DECENT RESTAURANT.
HUH?
ALL RIGHT!
FOOD FIGHT!
THINK THIS IS A JOB
FOR DARKWING DUCK?
DARKWING DUCK HAS
BETTER THINGS TO DO
THAN GET INVOLVED IN
SILLY FOOD FIGHTS!
NOW THAT IT'S
GOTTEN PERSONAL...
CHARGE!
QUACKERJACK?
YOU WERE EXPECTING MAYBE
THE GULPING GOURMET?
WHEN DID YOU SWITCH
FROM PLAYTHINGS
TO PIZZA?
YOU KNOW ME--
GAME FOR ANYTHING!
I'LL STOP
YOUR FOOD FETISH,
YOU FICKLE FELON!
WHAT A WAY
WITH WORDS!
WHAT'S HE UP TO?
YOU'LL NOT
TAINT THESE CHILDREN
WITH YOUR DISRESPECT
FOR AUTHORITY!
NO! HE'S SPOILING
EVERYTHING!
HE RUINED THE ONLY FUN
I'VE HAD TODAY.
WHAT'S THAT?
WHATEVER IT IS,
IT ISN'T FRIENDLY.
DARKWING, LOOK OUT!
GEE, THANKS.
IT WAS
MR. BANANA BRAIN!
[GOSALYN]
DAD DIDN'T BELIEVE ME.
[DARKWING] RIGHT.
I WAS SUPPOSED
TO BELIEVE
QUACKERJACK'S DOLL
MIRACULOUSLY--
ALL BY ITSELF--
BUZZED MY KEESTER.
WELL, IT DID.
O.K., FINE,
BUT I DIDN'T....
IF WE'RE GOING
TO CONTINUE THE STORY,
CAN WE TURN ON
SOME LIGHTS?
AND RUIN THE MOOD?
NOW MR. BANANA BRAIN
WAS REALLY MAD...
I THOUGHT
YOU'D BE HAPPY
TO SEE DARKWING
MADE A DUNCE!
WHY SHOULD I BE HAPPY?
DARKWING
RUINED MY MEAL!
I BARELY GOT THROUGH
THE HORS D'OEUVRES.
BUT
MR. BANANA BRAIN,
DARKWING DUCK
ALWAYS RUINS THINGS.
IT'S JUST PART
OF THE GAME.
YOU'D BETTER
FINISH HIM OFF
IMMEDIATELY!
NO SAWDUST-FILLED DOLL
IS GOING TO
ORDER ME AROUND!
IS THAT SO?
WELL, THEN,
FROM NOW ON,
YOU CAN BE THE DOLL.
HA HA HA HA HA HA!
HA HA HA HA HA HA!
M-MR. BANANA BRAIN,
WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?
DON'T CALL ME
BANANA BRAIN!
I AM PADDYWHACK!
YOU'RE A SNAPPY DRESSER,
BUT NOT VERY COLORFUL.
[HEAVY BREATHING]
THE NEO-MOD LOOK'S
SO EIGHTIES.
NICE DROOL, THOUGH.
YOU'RE REALLY QUITE MAD.
I LIKE THAT IN A CLOWN.
NOOOOO!
ONE MORE PRACTICAL JOKE,
YOUNG LADY,
AND YOU'RE GROUNDED
FOR LIFE!
DAD,
I DIDN'T DO IT!
[QUACKERJACK] NO!
WHAT WAS THAT?
LET'S FIND OUT.
HOMINA-HOMINA
HOMINA-HOMINA!
IT'S THAT WEIRD
JACK-IN-THE-BOX!
THAT QUACK LEFT
HIS PLUNDER BEHIND.
[BABBLING GIBBERISH]
DON'T TOUCH IT!
WHOA!
THAT THING ATE
QUACKERJACK!
THAT'S INCREDIBLE!
IT MEANS WE'RE DEALING
WITH AN ANCIENT EVIL
THAT COULD--AAH!
AAH! AAH! AAH!
GET A GRIP.
IT'S JUST A TOY.
WE'LL RETURN IT
TO THE MUSEUM TOMORROW.
I SUPPOSE YOU
PUT QUACKERJACK UP
TO THAT JOKE?
I'M INNOCENT!
MAYBE THE MUSEUM
HAS A DROP BOX.
THIS GIVES ME
THE CREEPS!
ME, TOO,
SO I'LL PUT IT
SOMEPLACE SAFE!
KEEP CALM,
LAUNCHPAD.
I'M SURE THIS HAS
A LOGICAL, RATIONAL
EXPLANATION.
YEAH, LIKE IT'S CURSED!
LET'S GET DAD!
RADICAL.
[LAUNCHPAD] REMEMBER
OUR PICNIC LAST SUMMER?
SUNNY, WITH FRESH AIR...
IT WAS A GREAT DAY
TO BE ALIVE.
LAUNCHPAD,
I'M TRYING TO BUILD
A LITTLE ATMOSPHERE!
I HATE
WHAT COMES NEXT!
RELAX. YOU KNOW IT
COMES OUT ALL RIGHT.
[LAUNCHPAD]
WE DIDN'T KNOW IT YET,
BUT PADDYWHACK
WAS GETTING COMFORTABLE!
OOH, YESSSS!
HOW GLOOMY!
THIS IS QUITE NICE.
QUITE NICE.
WONDER WHAT
THEY HAVE TO EAT.
IF I PINPOINT HIS
LAST KNOWN ROBBERIES,
THERE MAY BE A PATTERN!
GOSALYN, QUIT PLAYING
WITH THE THERMOSTAT!
HONESTLY,
IF THAT KID DOESN'T--
[SNARLING]
OH, NO.
I AM SO SCARED.
GOSALYN, DON'T WATCH
YOUR TAPES HERE!
THAT SHOULD KEEP IT
FROM WANDERING OFF.
WHATEVER SHE'S DOING,
GOSALYN WON'T MAKE ME
LOOK FOOLISH AGAIN!
WHOA!
GOSALYN, ABOUT YOUR
PRACTICAL JOKES...
DAD, IT WASN'T ME!
[GULP] I'M READY
TO BELIEVE YOU.
WILL YOU PLAY WITH ME?
O.K.,
HE'S STABILIZED.
YOU CAN GO ON.
I HAVEN'T LOST MY TOUCH.
WAS I AT THE STARING EYES
OR DROOLY FANGS?
UH, DROOLY FANGS.
I THINK.
[GOSALYN] ITS DROOLY FANGS
GLISTENED IN THE LIGHT.
THE THING'S NAME
WAS PADDYWHACK.
IT WANTED TO PLAY.
QUACKERJACK'S
AFRAID TO COME
HIMSELF, EH?
HE SENT
THE GEEK PATROL!
THINK QUACKERJACK
SENT ME?
HA HA HA HA HAAAH!
TALK ABOUT HAVING
A SCREW LOOSE!
SERIOUSLY, QUACKERJACK
IS A MINOR PLAYER...
NOT IN OUR LEAGUE.
WHAT LEAGUE?
PRACTICAL JOKERS,
OF COURSE.
YOU WOKE ME UP
WITH THAT
JOY BUZZER GAG.
OOPSIE.
AFTER SLEEPING
FOR CENTURIES,
I WOKE UP
A BIT PECKISH
AND NOW I MUST BE FED!
S-SORRY, BUT WE HAVEN'T BEEN
TO THE MARKET IN WEEKS!
NOT FOOD, SILLY!
PRANKS, GAGS,
MISCHIEF--
THAT'S WHAT I CRAVE!
IS THAT HOW YOU STAY THIN?
YOU'VE KEPT ME
FROM HAVING
A DECENT MEAL.
I ONLY WANTED TO SNACK
ON HUMAN MISERY,
BUT DID I?
NOOOOO!
YOU HAD TO SPOIL THE FUN!
EWW! GROSSARAMA.
O.K., MR. INFLATO-BRAIN,
I'VE HAD ENOUGH
OF THIS FOOLISHNESS!
YOU'RE GOING BACK
WHERE YOU CAME FROM!
[KARATE YELL]
WELL, IF THAT'S
YOUR ATTITUDE,
I'LL JUST LEAVE.
BUT YOU'RE NOT
INVITED
TO THE PARTY!
WELL, THAT WAS EASY.
WHAT PARTY
DID HE MEAN?
AAH!
IT WILL
BE WONDERFUL!
SIMPLY EVERYONE'S
COMING--
QUACKERJACK,
THAT DELIGHTFUL
BANANA BRAIN FELLOW,
AND MY FELLOW
TRICKSTER GOSALYN!
COME ALONG NOW.
MUSTN'T BE LATE!
DAD!
HE'S GOT ME!
LAUNCHPAD!
I CAN'T PULL YOU BOTH!
NO PROBLEMO!
I'VE GOT A FOOL
TO FINISH!
WHOA!
PADDYWHACK MUST DO
HIS OWN GARDENING.
WELL, NOBODY MAKES A CLOWN
OUT OF DARKWING DUCK!
IT'S NOT FAIR!
YOU GET ALL
THE NEAT CLOTHES!
QUACKERJACK?
GO AHEAD, LAUGH.
I FEEL SO FOOLISH!
HELP!
IF I STAY HERE
ANY LONGER,
I'LL GO CRAZY!
GO?
DON'T HOLD SANITY
AGAINST ME.
TO ESCAPE WE'LL
HAVE TO TEAM UP.
TEAM UP WITH YOU?
HA! THAT'S A LAUGH.
[PADDYWHACK'S
EVIL LAUGHTER]
NO,THAT'S A LAUGH.
MAYBE TEAMING UP
ISN'T A BAD IDEA.
QUACKERJACK...
LET'S GET RIDICULOUS!
YES! TIME TO TASTE
A LITTLE MISERY.
HEH HEH HEH.
HEH HEH HEH.
I THOUGHT YOU'D
BE MISERABLE.
HA HA! NOT US!
WE LOVE IT HERE!
OH, YEAH!
IT LETS ME TRULY
EXPRESS MYSELF.
SAY, QUACKERJACK,
DID YOU GET THE LICENSE
OF THAT TRUCK?
NO, BUT I GOT
THE TRUCK.
WAIT. I'M NOT
SUPPOSED TO--
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
I CERTAINLY WON'T
ANSWER THAT.
I'LL GET IT!
NO...
HE GOT IT!
STOP IT!
YOU'RE STARVING ME!
NOT SO TASTY ON
THE RECEIVING END,
IS IT?
[BANANA BRAIN]
ISN'T THIS WHERE
WE SHOW HIM LOVE
AND HE VOWS
TO MEND HIS EVIL WAYS?
NAH.
NAH.
OH, GOODNESS!
OH, GOODNESS!
NO, NO, NO!
I DON'T WANT
TO PLAY ANYMORE!
EVERYBODY GO HOME!
YOU'RE ALL RIGHT!
WAS THERE EVER
A DOUBT?
WHAT DO WE DO
WITH THIS THING?
[GOSALYN] AND THAT WAS
THE END OF PADDYWHACK!
YEP, YEP, YEP...
SEE, L.P., ALL
DARKWING CASES
HAVE
A HAPPY ENDING.
I'M JUST GLAD
THIS ONE'S OVER.
[MANIACAL LAUGHTER]
YESSSS...
YESSSSS!
[EVIL LAUGHTER]
♪ CHAMPION OF RIGHT ♪
♪ SWOOPS OUT OF
THE SHADOWS ♪
♪ DARKWING OF THE NIGHT ♪
♪ SOMEWHERE SOME
VILLAIN SCHEMES ♪
♪ BUT HIS NUMBER'S UP ♪
3, 2, 1!
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
♪ WHEN THERE'S TROUBLE
YOU CALL D.W. ♪
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
LET'S GET DANGEROUS.
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
DARKWING, DARKWING DUCK!
♪ A CLOUD OF SMOKE
AND HE APPEARS ♪
♪ THE MASTER OF SURPRISE ♪
♪ WHO'S THAT CUNNING
MIND BEHIND ♪
♪ THE SHADOWY DISGUISE ♪
♪ NOBODY KNOWS FOR SURE ♪
♪ THE BAD GUYS ARE
OUT OF LUCK ♪
♪ HERE COMES ♪
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
LOOK OUT!
♪ WHEN THERE'S TROUBLE
YOU CALL D.W. ♪
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
LET'S GET DANGEROUS!
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪
♪ YOU BETTER WATCH OUT,
YOU BAD BOYS ♪
♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪♪
THERE ARE 1,000 STORIES
IN ST. CANARD.
SOME ARE MUNDANE,
SOME EXOTIC,
SOME STRANGER THAN OTHERS,
BUT ONE THING
REMAINS THE SAME--
I'M IN ALL THE GOOD ONES.
I COULD USE A
GOOD STORY.
GOSALYN!
SHOULDN'T YOU
BE HOME...
IN BED?
COULDN'T SLEEP.
AW, DAD...
TELL ME A STORY.
IT'LL HELP ME RELAX.
OH, SINCE IT IS
EDUCATIONAL.
THIS STORY IS A TALE
OF COURAGE AND DERRING-DO.
I CALL IT...
I WANT TO RELAX,
NOT GO COMATOSE.
HOW ABOUT SOMETHING
MORE INTERESTING,
LIKE...
ISN'T THAT
TOO INTERESTING?
[GULP]
YES, THAT WAS ONE
OF MY
F-F-FAVORITE CASES.
I DON'T KNOW
WHY YOU'RE UPSET
ABOUT A HAUNTED
JACK-IN-THE-BOX!
IT STARTED WHEN
MY CHEAPSKATE DAD
COPPED OUT ON A TRIP
TO WHIRLING WATER WORLD
AND TOOK US TO
THE MUSEUM INSTEAD.
DO YOU KNOW WHAT
ADMISSION PRICES ARE?
YOU SHOULD
BE HAPPY.
YOU LOVE TOYS!
WHAT TOYS?
THEY'RE RELICS!
THIS DOESN'T EVEN
HAVE BATTERIES.
LOOK WITH
YOUR EYES ONLY.
I DON'T NEED YOU
BREAKING THESE ANTIQUES.
IT'S BAD ENOUGH
WE HAVE TO WORRY
ABOUT QUACKERJACK
STEALING THEM.
[DARKWING] AHEM.
I KNEW HE WAS THERE
THE WHOLE TIME.
[GOSALYN] DAD WASN'T
TAKING TIME OUT
FROM CRIME-FIGHTING
TO HAVE ANY FUN.
WHOA--A FIRST EDITION
ELECTROZAPPER
JOY BUZZER!
PERFECT!
[LAUNCHPAD] ISN'T THIS
WHERE THE TROUBLE STARTED?
I WAS TRYING
TO GET DAD
TO LIGHTEN UP.
HUH?
WHAT?
OOH! YES, YES!
GEE, THAT WASN'T
VERY NICE.
OH, DAD LOVES A GOOD
PRACTICAL JOKE!
PRACTICAL JOKES!
YES!
RELAX, DAD!
I'LL GET YOU DOWN!
OH-WHOA-WHOA-WHOA
WHOA-WHOA-WHOA-WHOA
WHOA-WHOA-WHOA-WHOA
WHOA-WHOA-WHOA-WHOA!
OOPS.
WELL, I GOT HIM DOWN.
MAMA!
MAMA!
OH, TASTY!
YUM YUM YUM YUM!
AREN'T YOU TOO BIG
TO PLAY WITH DOLLS?
AAH!
[BUZZ]
GOSALYN,
I DO NOT APPRECIATE
BEING EMBARRASSED!
I WANTED
TO DIVERT YOU.
YOU SHOULD
HAVE SOME FUN!
LET'S PLAY
VIDEO GAMES.
VIDEO GAMES?
YOU'RE LEAVING
TO PLAY VIDEO GAMES?
THAT SORT OF TALK
DROVE ME FROM
THE TOY BUSINESS
TO THE LOONEY BIN!
YEP!
THIS GUY'S NUTTIER
THAN A BAG
OF CASHEWS,
AND IT'S PLAYTIME!
OOH...WHO'S THIS?
WHO'S THIS?
HOLD IT RIGHT THERE,
QUACKERJACK!
TENNIS, ANYONE?
I'D ASK YOU TO PLAY,
BUT YOU'RE
ALL TIED UP!
WHERE'S A PHONE BOOTH
WHEN YOU NEED ONE?
HAVING ABALL,
ARE WE?
[GIGGLING]
SIMPLY SCRUMPTIOUS!
[LAUNCHPAD] THIS CASE WAS
FUNNIER THAN I REMEMBERED!
[GOSALYN] YEAH!
DAD WAS PRETTY GOOFY!
I PROTECTED
MY SECRET IDENTITY
AND THREW HIM
OFF GUARD.
YEAH, RIGHT.
WE CAN SKIP
THE NEXT PART.
YOU WILL NOT!
THIS IS WHERE I TROUNCE
THAT LOONEY QUACKERJACK!
[GOSALYN]
YEAH. DAD DID HIS,
"I AM THE YO-YO THAT
KEEPS COMING BACK" STUFF.
[DARKWING]
WAIT! WAIT! WAIT!
WHY SO FAST?
[LAUNCHPAD]
NICE CURVE BALL, D.W.
[DARKWING]
WOULD YOU PLEASE
STOP GOING SO FAST?
SLOW DOWN!
SLOW DOWN!
[GOSALYN] O.K.
NOT HERE!
[CHOMP]
AAH!
OH, GOODY, GOODY,
GOODY, GOODY, GOODY!
[GOSALYN] THIS IS WHEN
IT GOT REALLY WEIRD.
[LAUNCHPAD] AREN'T YOU
RELAXED NOW, GOS?
THE THING IN THE BOX
SEEMED TO FEED OFF
EVERY MEAN-SPIRITED JOKE.
YOU'RE MISSING
A GREAT RERUN OF
PELICAN'S ISLAND.
IT WAS GETTING STRONGER...
YOU WON'T STOP.
AND STRONGER, UNTIL...
HERE'S
A CHILDHOOD FAVORITE--
WACKY PUTTY,
FOR THAT EXTRA STICKY FUN!
WHAT HIT ME?
SEE YA
ON THE PLAYGROUND!
HA HA HA HA!
GET THIS STUFF
OFF OF ME!
I'M TRYING!
[CROWD LAUGHING]
DARKWING'S A RIOT!
YOU AND THE DOLL GUY
SHOULD TEAM UP
FOR A STOOGE ACT!
[LAUGHTER]
YOU'RE KILLING THEM,
D.W.!
MAYBE YOU SHOULD
CONSIDER SHOWBIZ!
I'LL DO THAT.
[GOSALYN] QUACKERJACK
THOUGHT HE WAS SAFE...
BUT HE WAS WRONG!
SO THAT'S WHY
IT WAS CHAINED.
OHH, IT'S BROKEN!
WELL, I SHOULD WORK
ON MY OWN TOYS.
THEY'RE MUCH BETTER.
MMM...YES!
FREE AT LAST!
OOH, YES!
THIS WILL DO NICELY!
QUACKERJACK,
YOU INSANE GENIUS!
YOU'VE CREATED
THE PERFECT DOLL...
TO MAKE LITTLE GIRLS
SCREAM!
IN DELIGHT, OF COURSE.
[GASP]
WILL YOU
PLAY WITH ME?
MR. BANANA BRAIN,
YOUR VOICE HAS CHANGED.
I LIKE IT!
NICE FLYING TRICK,
TOO!
PLEASE PLAY WITH ME.
WELL, JUST NAME
YOUR GAME, PARTNER.
OOH! HOW ABOUT MY GLOBAL
DESTRUCTION BINGO?
PERHAPS YOU'D PREFER MY
DEMOLITION DERBY GAME.
WE COULD USE
OUR NEIGHBOR'S NEW CAR!
WE COULD DO SOMETHING
MUCH MORE FUN.
YEAH.
UH-HUH, UH-HUH.
OOH, YES!
THIS IS PERFECT!
JUST THE PLACE TO TIE ON
THE OLD FEED BAG!
EATING IS ALL
YOU TALK ABOUT!
PIZZA'S BAD FOR
YOUR COMPLEXION.
OH, I DON'T EAT...
PIZZA.
ALLOW ME.
WHAT GOES UP...
AAH!
MUST CAUSE FROWNS.
HA HA HA HA HA!
HMMPH!
BUT--BUT MELINDA!
MMM, DELICIOUS--
THE SWEET HONEY
OF HUMAN SUFFERING.
BOO!
AAH!
HA HA HA HA HA!
LIKE THEY SAY,
"THE APPLE
DOESN'T FALL FAR
FROM THE TREE."
THIS DOLL'S
AS GOOFY AS ME.
[ARF ARF]
[SNARLING]
YAAA!
HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE!
HA HA HA HA!
[CRYING]
HA HA HA HA!
WHEN DO I GET
TO HAVE FUN?
WELL,
HOW ABOUT NOW?
YOU'RE FINALLY TAKING ME
TO A DECENT RESTAURANT.
HUH?
ALL RIGHT!
FOOD FIGHT!
THINK THIS IS A JOB
FOR DARKWING DUCK?
DARKWING DUCK HAS
BETTER THINGS TO DO
THAN GET INVOLVED IN
SILLY FOOD FIGHTS!
NOW THAT IT'S
GOTTEN PERSONAL...
CHARGE!
QUACKERJACK?
YOU WERE EXPECTING MAYBE
THE GULPING GOURMET?
WHEN DID YOU SWITCH
FROM PLAYTHINGS
TO PIZZA?
YOU KNOW ME--
GAME FOR ANYTHING!
I'LL STOP
YOUR FOOD FETISH,
YOU FICKLE FELON!
WHAT A WAY
WITH WORDS!
WHAT'S HE UP TO?
YOU'LL NOT
TAINT THESE CHILDREN
WITH YOUR DISRESPECT
FOR AUTHORITY!
NO! HE'S SPOILING
EVERYTHING!
HE RUINED THE ONLY FUN
I'VE HAD TODAY.
WHAT'S THAT?
WHATEVER IT IS,
IT ISN'T FRIENDLY.
DARKWING, LOOK OUT!
GEE, THANKS.
IT WAS
MR. BANANA BRAIN!
[GOSALYN]
DAD DIDN'T BELIEVE ME.
[DARKWING] RIGHT.
I WAS SUPPOSED
TO BELIEVE
QUACKERJACK'S DOLL
MIRACULOUSLY--
ALL BY ITSELF--
BUZZED MY KEESTER.
WELL, IT DID.
O.K., FINE,
BUT I DIDN'T....
IF WE'RE GOING
TO CONTINUE THE STORY,
CAN WE TURN ON
SOME LIGHTS?
AND RUIN THE MOOD?
NOW MR. BANANA BRAIN
WAS REALLY MAD...
I THOUGHT
YOU'D BE HAPPY
TO SEE DARKWING
MADE A DUNCE!
WHY SHOULD I BE HAPPY?
DARKWING
RUINED MY MEAL!
I BARELY GOT THROUGH
THE HORS D'OEUVRES.
BUT
MR. BANANA BRAIN,
DARKWING DUCK
ALWAYS RUINS THINGS.
IT'S JUST PART
OF THE GAME.
YOU'D BETTER
FINISH HIM OFF
IMMEDIATELY!
NO SAWDUST-FILLED DOLL
IS GOING TO
ORDER ME AROUND!
IS THAT SO?
WELL, THEN,
FROM NOW ON,
YOU CAN BE THE DOLL.
HA HA HA HA HA HA!
HA HA HA HA HA HA!
M-MR. BANANA BRAIN,
WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?
DON'T CALL ME
BANANA BRAIN!
I AM PADDYWHACK!
YOU'RE A SNAPPY DRESSER,
BUT NOT VERY COLORFUL.
[HEAVY BREATHING]
THE NEO-MOD LOOK'S
SO EIGHTIES.
NICE DROOL, THOUGH.
YOU'RE REALLY QUITE MAD.
I LIKE THAT IN A CLOWN.
NOOOOO!
ONE MORE PRACTICAL JOKE,
YOUNG LADY,
AND YOU'RE GROUNDED
FOR LIFE!
DAD,
I DIDN'T DO IT!
[QUACKERJACK] NO!
WHAT WAS THAT?
LET'S FIND OUT.
HOMINA-HOMINA
HOMINA-HOMINA!
IT'S THAT WEIRD
JACK-IN-THE-BOX!
THAT QUACK LEFT
HIS PLUNDER BEHIND.
[BABBLING GIBBERISH]
DON'T TOUCH IT!
WHOA!
THAT THING ATE
QUACKERJACK!
THAT'S INCREDIBLE!
IT MEANS WE'RE DEALING
WITH AN ANCIENT EVIL
THAT COULD--AAH!
AAH! AAH! AAH!
GET A GRIP.
IT'S JUST A TOY.
WE'LL RETURN IT
TO THE MUSEUM TOMORROW.
I SUPPOSE YOU
PUT QUACKERJACK UP
TO THAT JOKE?
I'M INNOCENT!
MAYBE THE MUSEUM
HAS A DROP BOX.
THIS GIVES ME
THE CREEPS!
ME, TOO,
SO I'LL PUT IT
SOMEPLACE SAFE!
KEEP CALM,
LAUNCHPAD.
I'M SURE THIS HAS
A LOGICAL, RATIONAL
EXPLANATION.
YEAH, LIKE IT'S CURSED!
LET'S GET DAD!
RADICAL.
[LAUNCHPAD] REMEMBER
OUR PICNIC LAST SUMMER?
SUNNY, WITH FRESH AIR...
IT WAS A GREAT DAY
TO BE ALIVE.
LAUNCHPAD,
I'M TRYING TO BUILD
A LITTLE ATMOSPHERE!
I HATE
WHAT COMES NEXT!
RELAX. YOU KNOW IT
COMES OUT ALL RIGHT.
[LAUNCHPAD]
WE DIDN'T KNOW IT YET,
BUT PADDYWHACK
WAS GETTING COMFORTABLE!
OOH, YESSSS!
HOW GLOOMY!
THIS IS QUITE NICE.
QUITE NICE.
WONDER WHAT
THEY HAVE TO EAT.
IF I PINPOINT HIS
LAST KNOWN ROBBERIES,
THERE MAY BE A PATTERN!
GOSALYN, QUIT PLAYING
WITH THE THERMOSTAT!
HONESTLY,
IF THAT KID DOESN'T--
[SNARLING]
OH, NO.
I AM SO SCARED.
GOSALYN, DON'T WATCH
YOUR TAPES HERE!
THAT SHOULD KEEP IT
FROM WANDERING OFF.
WHATEVER SHE'S DOING,
GOSALYN WON'T MAKE ME
LOOK FOOLISH AGAIN!
WHOA!
GOSALYN, ABOUT YOUR
PRACTICAL JOKES...
DAD, IT WASN'T ME!
[GULP] I'M READY
TO BELIEVE YOU.
WILL YOU PLAY WITH ME?
O.K.,
HE'S STABILIZED.
YOU CAN GO ON.
I HAVEN'T LOST MY TOUCH.
WAS I AT THE STARING EYES
OR DROOLY FANGS?
UH, DROOLY FANGS.
I THINK.
[GOSALYN] ITS DROOLY FANGS
GLISTENED IN THE LIGHT.
THE THING'S NAME
WAS PADDYWHACK.
IT WANTED TO PLAY.
QUACKERJACK'S
AFRAID TO COME
HIMSELF, EH?
HE SENT
THE GEEK PATROL!
THINK QUACKERJACK
SENT ME?
HA HA HA HA HAAAH!
TALK ABOUT HAVING
A SCREW LOOSE!
SERIOUSLY, QUACKERJACK
IS A MINOR PLAYER...
NOT IN OUR LEAGUE.
WHAT LEAGUE?
PRACTICAL JOKERS,
OF COURSE.
YOU WOKE ME UP
WITH THAT
JOY BUZZER GAG.
OOPSIE.
AFTER SLEEPING
FOR CENTURIES,
I WOKE UP
A BIT PECKISH
AND NOW I MUST BE FED!
S-SORRY, BUT WE HAVEN'T BEEN
TO THE MARKET IN WEEKS!
NOT FOOD, SILLY!
PRANKS, GAGS,
MISCHIEF--
THAT'S WHAT I CRAVE!
IS THAT HOW YOU STAY THIN?
YOU'VE KEPT ME
FROM HAVING
A DECENT MEAL.
I ONLY WANTED TO SNACK
ON HUMAN MISERY,
BUT DID I?
NOOOOO!
YOU HAD TO SPOIL THE FUN!
EWW! GROSSARAMA.
O.K., MR. INFLATO-BRAIN,
I'VE HAD ENOUGH
OF THIS FOOLISHNESS!
YOU'RE GOING BACK
WHERE YOU CAME FROM!
[KARATE YELL]
WELL, IF THAT'S
YOUR ATTITUDE,
I'LL JUST LEAVE.
BUT YOU'RE NOT
INVITED
TO THE PARTY!
WELL, THAT WAS EASY.
WHAT PARTY
DID HE MEAN?
AAH!
IT WILL
BE WONDERFUL!
SIMPLY EVERYONE'S
COMING--
QUACKERJACK,
THAT DELIGHTFUL
BANANA BRAIN FELLOW,
AND MY FELLOW
TRICKSTER GOSALYN!
COME ALONG NOW.
MUSTN'T BE LATE!
DAD!
HE'S GOT ME!
LAUNCHPAD!
I CAN'T PULL YOU BOTH!
NO PROBLEMO!
I'VE GOT A FOOL
TO FINISH!
WHOA!
PADDYWHACK MUST DO
HIS OWN GARDENING.
WELL, NOBODY MAKES A CLOWN
OUT OF DARKWING DUCK!
IT'S NOT FAIR!
YOU GET ALL
THE NEAT CLOTHES!
QUACKERJACK?
GO AHEAD, LAUGH.
I FEEL SO FOOLISH!
HELP!
IF I STAY HERE
ANY LONGER,
I'LL GO CRAZY!
GO?
DON'T HOLD SANITY
AGAINST ME.
TO ESCAPE WE'LL
HAVE TO TEAM UP.
TEAM UP WITH YOU?
HA! THAT'S A LAUGH.
[PADDYWHACK'S
EVIL LAUGHTER]
NO,THAT'S A LAUGH.
MAYBE TEAMING UP
ISN'T A BAD IDEA.
QUACKERJACK...
LET'S GET RIDICULOUS!
YES! TIME TO TASTE
A LITTLE MISERY.
HEH HEH HEH.
HEH HEH HEH.
I THOUGHT YOU'D
BE MISERABLE.
HA HA! NOT US!
WE LOVE IT HERE!
OH, YEAH!
IT LETS ME TRULY
EXPRESS MYSELF.
SAY, QUACKERJACK,
DID YOU GET THE LICENSE
OF THAT TRUCK?
NO, BUT I GOT
THE TRUCK.
WAIT. I'M NOT
SUPPOSED TO--
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
I CERTAINLY WON'T
ANSWER THAT.
I'LL GET IT!
NO...
HE GOT IT!
STOP IT!
YOU'RE STARVING ME!
NOT SO TASTY ON
THE RECEIVING END,
IS IT?
[BANANA BRAIN]
ISN'T THIS WHERE
WE SHOW HIM LOVE
AND HE VOWS
TO MEND HIS EVIL WAYS?
NAH.
NAH.
OH, GOODNESS!
OH, GOODNESS!
NO, NO, NO!
I DON'T WANT
TO PLAY ANYMORE!
EVERYBODY GO HOME!
YOU'RE ALL RIGHT!
WAS THERE EVER
A DOUBT?
WHAT DO WE DO
WITH THIS THING?
[GOSALYN] AND THAT WAS
THE END OF PADDYWHACK!
YEP, YEP, YEP...
SEE, L.P., ALL
DARKWING CASES
HAVE
A HAPPY ENDING.
I'M JUST GLAD
THIS ONE'S OVER.
[MANIACAL LAUGHTER]
YESSSS...
YESSSSS!
[EVIL LAUGHTER]