Darkwing Duck (1991–1992): Season 1, Episode 12 - Easy Comes, Easy Grows - full transcript

Hoping to keep his money safe from the vault-snatcher hitting the banks, Herb Muddlefoot buries his bills beneath his yard. However, contrary to popular belief, the money DOES begin to grow a money tree, of which Gosalyn and Honker quickly take advantage of. When Drake "Darkwing Duck" Mallard discovers this, he's quick to accept the trendy money-grubbing lifestyle. That is, until he's arrested for counterfeiting, as the bills were all grown with the same serial number and the tree has withered. Now it's up to Gosalyn, Launchpad and Honker to free DW and figure out where the grown greenbacks are literally running to.

♪ DARING DUCK OF MYSTERY ♪

♪ CHAMPION OF RIGHT ♪

♪ SWOOPS OUT
OF THE SHADOWS ♪

♪ DARKWING OF THE NIGHT ♪

♪ SOMEWHERE
SOME VILLAIN SCHEMES ♪

♪ BUT HIS NUMBER'S UP ♪

3, 2, 1!

♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪

♪ WHEN THERE'S TROUBLE
YOU CALL D.W. ♪

♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪

LET'S GET DANGEROUS.



♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪

DARKWING, DARKWING DUCK!

♪ A CLOUD OF SMOKE
AND HE APPEARS ♪

♪ THE MASTER OF SURPRISE ♪

♪ WHO'S THAT CUNNING
MIND BEHIND ♪

♪ THE SHADOWY DISGUISE ♪

♪ NOBODY KNOWS FOR SURE ♪

♪ THE BAD GUYS
ARE OUT OF LUCK ♪

♪ HERE COMES ♪

♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪

LOOK OUT!

♪ WHEN THERE'S TROUBLE
YOU CALL D.W. ♪

♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪

LET'S GET DANGEROUS!



♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪

♪ YOU BETTER WATCH OUT,
YOU BAD BOYS ♪

♪ DARKWING DUCK ♪♪

AS A CLEVERLY CONCOCTED
CRIME WAVE

CRASHES OVER ST. CANARD,

A DROWNING POLICE FORCE
CALLS DARKWING.

SO, ARMED WITH
AN AWESOME ARRAY

OF CRIMEFIGHTING GIZMOS
AND--AND THINGAMABOBS,

OUR HERO'S
SURE TO SIFT OUT

THE SLIGHTEST SHRED
OF EVIDENCE.

AHA! FINGERPRINTS!

A PERFECT MATCH.

CONFESS! YOUR
FINGERPRINTS ARE
ALL OVER THIS PLACE!

BUT I'M THE BANK'S
PRESIDENT.

OF COURSE.
I KNEW THAT.

WELL, THAT'S
JUST GREAT.

WHOEVER TOOK
THE MONEY DIDN'T
LEAVE CLUES.

CLUE? THEY DIDN'T
LEAVE THE SAFE.

JUST LIKE
THE OTHER ROBBERIES.

IT'S LIKE THE VAULT
JUST WALKED AWAY.

WHAT DID YOU SAY?
THAT'S STUPID!

THERE'S NOTHING HERE.

LET'S CHECK
THE ARMORED CAR SHIPMENT.

WITH ALL THE ROBBERIES
IN TOWN,

MONEY JUST ISN'T SAFE
IN SAFES ANYMORE...

WHICH IS WHY OLD
HERB MUDDLEFOOT

IS KEEPING HIS MONEY
WHERE NO CROOK WILL LOOK.

[SINGING OFF KEY]

OOH! I DON'T REMEMBER
MY DAISIES HERE.

THE POOR DEARS
LOOK PARCHED.

[SPUTTERING]

HERB!

HIYA, HONEYBUNCH.

WHAT YOU DOING OUT?

SINGING MY PLANTS
TO SLEEP.

THEY LOVE SOFT MUSIC.

UH, WHAT ARE
YOU DOING, DEAR?

WELL, I WAS JUST
ENRICHING THE SOIL,

TRYING TO GET THOSE
AZALEAS TO GROW.

OH, GOOD. YOU SHOULD TRY
THAT MR. MULCH FERTILIZER.

IT'S SUPPOSED TO MAKE
ANYTHING GROW.

BOY, WOULDN'T THAT
BE NICE,

BUT MONEY DOESN'T
GROW ON TREES.

[GRUNTING]

WE'LL NEVER GET RICH
AT A PENNY A WEED.

ESPECIALLY AFTER
WE PAY MY MOM

FOR THE PLANTS
YOU RUINED.

WELL, THIS GARDENING STUFF
ISN'T EASY.

THOSE WEEDS
LOOK LIKE FLOWERS,

AND THESE FLOWERS
LOOK LIKE DOLLAR BILLS.

HONKER, SCOPE THIS OUT.

WOW! DO YOU THINK
IT'S REAL?

REAL ENOUGH FOR ME.
IT'S OUR OWN MONEY TREE!

SHH! WE GOT
TO KEEP THIS SECRET.

LET'S PUT IT
SOMEPLACE SAFE.

UHH! UHH!

THERE. NOW WE
CAN JUST WATCH
OUR MONEY GROW.

WHAT DO YOU THINK,
HONK-MAN?

I'D SAY
IT'S HARVEST TIME.

HA HA HA!
SOUNDS GOOD TO ME.

YES!

THIS BEATS LIVING
ON MY ALLOWANCE!

GETTING RAISES
FROM DAD TAKES FOREVER.

D.W., IT'S TAKING FOREVER
TO CATCH THIS CROOK.

THAT'S WHY WE'RE
SETTING A TRAP.

I'M WILLING TO RISK
A CONSIDERABLE
AMOUNT OF MY MONEY,

WHICH IS IN MY--

SAFE.

LOOKS LIKE
THEY TOOK THE BAIT.

YEAH. THE WHOLE 20 BUCKS.

YOU WOULD BAIT THE TRAP
WITH 20 BUCKS?

AND THE FAMILY
JEWELS.

THEY DON'T MAKE
RHINESTONES LIKE
THAT ANYMORE.

OK. WE'LL BUY YOUR ELECTRON
MICROSCOPE TOMORROW,

BUT ONLY BECAUSE THE RECORD
STORE'S OUT OF CDs.

GOSALYN!

WHERE DID YOU GET
THIS STUFF?

MORE IMPORTANTLY,
HOW DID YOU
PAY FOR IT?

WON THE LOTTERY?

DON'T TRY
TO FOOL ME.

I'M NOT
A NORMAL FATHER.

WELL,
CALL THE PAPERS.

A CHAIN'S ONLY AS STRONG
AS ITS WEAKEST LINK,

ISN'T THAT RIGHT, HONKER?

UH, I--UH--WHOA!

UM...UM...UH...

I DON'T CARE WHERE
YOU GOT THE MONEY!

THESE ARE GOING
BACK RIGHT NOW!

WE PAID FOR IT.

HOW?

ALL RIGHT,
I'LL TELL YOU.

HE SEEMS SO DIFFERENT.

YOU THINK THERE'S
SOMETHING WRONG WITH HIM?

NOTHING AN EXORCISM
WON'T FIX.

HA HA HA HA!

♪ 1, 3, 5, 9 ♪

♪ WHAT A GUY,
HE'S MIGHTY FINE ♪

♪ YAY, MONEY ♪♪

I'LL TAKE THAT.

HEY, THAT'S OURS.

BUT YOU NEED PARENTS
TO HELP MANAGE YOUR MONEY.

DAD!

NO NEED TO THANK ME.

HEY!

NOW, LET'S GET SERIOUS.

FIRST, A BED
OF FERTILIZER...

TO MAKE OUR ASSETS GROW.

PLENTY OF LIGHT
TO BRIGHTEN OUR FUTURE.

AREN'T YOU
OVERDOING IT A BIT?

NAH, JUST MAKING SURE
BUSINESS KEEPS BLOOMING.

WE BETTER FIND SOMEPLACE
SAFE TO STASH ALL THIS.

OW!

OF COURSE THIS ALL GOES
INTO A SAVINGS ACCOUNT,

AFTER I PICK UP
A FEW ODDS AND ENDS.

[CAR HORN PLAYSDIXIE]

DID YOU ORDER A PIZZA?

I WONDER HOW MUCH
OF THIS IS FOR ME?

GOT A TREAT FOR YOU
RIGHT HERE, GUYS.

HO! PRETTY IMPRESSIVE
DUDS THERE, D.W.

ONE DOES HAVE TO KEEP UP
WITH THE TRENDS.

IT'S ONE OF THE BURDENS
OF MY LIFESTYLE.

A KEY RING?

A GENUINE GUCCI-GOO,
THE ABSOLUTE TRENDIEST.

I'M UNDERWHELMED.

IT'S ALL PART
OF THE LIFESTYLE

OF THE NEW
DRAKE MALLARD.

WELL, MR. TRENDO,

ARE YOU DUMPING THE OLD
DARKWING DUCK, TOO?

GOSALYN,
PERISH THE THOUGHT.

THE CITY'S
NEVER BEEN SAFER.

YES, SIR.

SCURRY OUT AND SCOUR
THE STREETS OF CRIME.

YES, SIR.

DARKWING DEFENDERS,
INC.

A SECURITY FRANCHISE
AVAILABLE IN MOST
METROPOLITAN AREAS.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

OH, ANOTHER DELIVERY!

FROM NOW ON,
EVERY DAY IS CHRISTMAS.

AND HOW NICE,
A POLICE ESCORT.

HERE, I BELIEVE
THAT'S C.O.D.

NO, IT'S C.I.A.
--CAUGHT IN THE ACT.

HMM, HMM.
HAVE YOU RED-HANDED.

THESE HAVE
THE SERIAL NUMBER

OF THE PHONY ONES
AROUND TOWN.

WHAT DO YOU
MEAN PHONY?

AS IN YOU'RE UNDER ARREST
FOR COUNTERFEITING.

B-BUT
YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.

THAT MONEY WAS PLANTED.

RIGHT. PLANTED
ALL OVER TOWN.

NO! I MEAN,
I GREW IT!

I'VE, UH, TAKEN A FEW
SECURITY PRECAUTIONS.

THERE.
NOW YOU'LL SEE.

IT WASN'T PRINTED,
BUT THAT MONEY'S
100% NATURAL.

YAAH!

SO, THAT'S YOUR
MONEY TREE, HUH?

YOU'VE BEEN WATCHING
TOO MANY CARTOONS, DUCK.

COME ON, THEY'RE WAITING
FOR YOU DOWNTOWN.

MY DAD'S NO CROOK!

ALTHOUGH HE SHORTS ME
ON MY ALLOWANCE.

[LAUNCHPAD]
DON'T WORRY, D.W.
WE'LL HELP YOU!

WE'LL KEEP THIS
FUNNY MONEY FOR EVIDENCE.

AND I CERTAINLY DON'T WANT
TO FORGET THE MONEY TREE.

THIS IS REAL
IMPORTANT EVIDENCE.

HA HA HA!

HA HA HA HA!

THIS REALLY BLOWS.

KIDS SHOULDN'T
HAVE TO GO THROUGH
SUCH HARSH REALITY.

YEAH. IT'S ROUGH
HAVING YOUR DAD IN JAIL.

HUH? NO, NOW
WE'VE GOT TO RETURN

ALL THIS STUFF WE BOUGHT.

BUT GETTING DAD OUT
WOULDN'T HURT EITHER.

HEY, CHASE
THOSE CLOUDS AWAY.

WE'LL MAKE D.W.'s BAIL.

I'LL GIVE HIM
MY LAST DIME.

OOPS, GUESS I SPENT THAT.

ALL I'VE GOT
IS MY ALLOWANCE.

THAT'S MORE THAN ME.

I'VE ONLY GOT SOME
OF THAT PHONY MONEY.

THAT WON'T DO
ANYONE ANY GOOD.

WHAT'S HAPPENING?

OLD PIGGY-WIGGY WANTS
TO DO THE HOKEY-POKEY.

[SNORTING]

THIS LITTLE PIGGY'S
GOING TO STAY HOME.

HONKER, DON'T LET IT OUT!

UH, UH, UH, AAH!

HELP!

WE'RE--WE'RE COMING,
LITTLE BUDDY!

AAH!

OH! OH! AAH!

LAUNCHPAD!

OOH, DO YOU
THINK IT COULD BE
A PROWLER, DEAR?

A PROWLER! SOMEBODY'S
AFTER OUR MONEY!

OUR MONEY?

IT WON'T HURT
TO DOUBLE-CHECK.

IT SHOULD BE
RIGHT DOWN...HERE?

OH, MAYBE I DIDN'T
DIG DEEP ENOUGH.

HERB?

WHY'S OUR MONEY
BACK HERE?

UM, I BURIED IT.

JUST A LITTLE EXTRA
SECURITY, HONEY.

WELL, WHERE'S
THE MONEY NOW, HMM?

I THOUGHT
I BURIED IT HERE,

BUT I THINK IT WAS
OVER BY THE ROSES.

JUST TWO SHAKES
OF A PUP'S TALE.

I'VE GOT TO FIND
A WAY OUT OF THIS MESS.

OOH!

THERE'S AN ESCAPE
I WOULDN'T HAVE THOUGHT OF.

THIS LOOKS LIKE
A JOB FOR...

DARKWING DUCK.

YEE-HA!

PLEASE LET
ME GO, PIGGY.

I PROMISE NEVER TO EAT
A HAM SANDWICH AGAIN.

HANG ON, HONKER!

WE'LL BRING
THAT PIG DOWN!

NICE TOSS, GOS!

THAT OUGHT TO TIRE OUT
THE LITTLE PIGSTER.

WHOA!

THERE'S A NEW WAY OF
MAKING A NIGHT WITHDRAWAL.

GOSALYN?

WHAT ARE YOU
DOING OUT?

I WAS CHASING HIM.

LOOK AT THIS.

THESE
COUNTERFEIT BILLS
ARE LIKE SEEDS.

THAT'S WHY
THE LOCKER
SPROUTED ROOTS

AND HOW
THE BANK VAULT LEFT.

NOW I KNOW
WHO'S BEHIND THIS.

HOW STUPID
COULD I BE?

DOES HE REALLY
WANT AN ANSWER?

THANK YOU
FOR YOUR SUPPORT.

DON'T YOU SEE? IT COULD
ONLY BE ONE VILLAIN.

THAT HALF-DUCK,
HALF-PLANT CROOK--

DR. REGINALD BUSHROOT!

HEE HEE HEE!

NOT BAD FOR A MUTATED
RESEARCH SCIENTIST, HUH?

[DOOR OPENS]

I DEVELOPED PLANTS THAT
NOT ONLY MAKE MONEY...

THEY TAKE MONEY, TOO!

NOW I'M RICH AND GIVE
MY PLANT PALS GOODIES.

LOOKIE--
IMPORTED BOTTLE WATER.

[CASH REGISTER RINGS]

WHAT DO YOU THINK
OF THESE DESIGNER
PAINTED POTS?

ONLY THE BEST
FOR YOU, BABE.

OOH. HA HA HA HA!

THE WHOLE WORLD'S OURS
FOR THE MULCHING!

DON'T COUNT
YOUR SEEDS
BEFORE THEY SPROUT!

NO, NOT HIM AGAIN!

THE TERROR FLAPPING
IN THE NIGHT.

STOP THAT GUY!

I AM THE CLIPPER
THAT TRIMS
YOUR HEDGES.

I AM DARKWING DUCK!

YOU'RE FINISHED,
BUSHROOT.

I'VE DISCOVERED
YOUR SCHEME,
EXCEPT ONE THING--

WHY STEAL MONEY
WHEN IT GROWS?

I DIDN'T WANT TO,
BUT MINE DOESN'T LAST.

WHOSE DOES?

WELL, YOU WON'T NEED
MONEY IN PRISON!

I CAN'T GO THERE.

I'D NEVER GET
ENOUGH SUNLIGHT.

[DARKWING]
SO, RENT YOURSELF
A TANNING BOOTH.

UH.
UH.
UH.

UH-OH.

THOUGHT I'D BE
A PUSHOVER, DIDN'T YOU?

WELL, I'M GOING SHOPPING,

WHILE YOU STAY HERE
AND ROT ON THE VINE.

GO AHEAD, BOYS.

GIVE 'EM
THE SQUEEZE PLAY.

WE'VE BEEN IN SOME
TIGHT SPOTS BEFORE, D.W.

BUT NEVER WITH
MUSICAL ACCOMPANIMENT.





WELL, MAYBE I CAN STRIKE
A MORE POSITIVE NOTE.

IT'S MY TURN NOW.

[PLAYS
SNAKE CHARMING TUNE]

OH, MAJOR LEAGUE
IMPRESSIVE, DAD.

WHEW, GUESS
MOM WAS RIGHT.

PLANTS
LIKE MUSIC.

RIGHT. NOW MY NEXT NUMBER

WILL FEATURE
BUSHROOT SINGING,

THE JAILHOUSE BLUES.

HOW MUCH FOR
THE WHOLE PLACE?

SELL MY FERTILIZER
FACTORY?

NEVER!

I MADE THE FINEST
GOURMET PLANT FOOD

IN ALL OF ST. CANARD.

AH, SMELL THAT AROMA.
FEEL THAT CONSISTENCY.

HMM, HMM, OH!

AND SAVOR THAT FLAVOR.

I'LL PAY WHATEVER
YOU ASK, ANYTHING.

I CAN'T SELL.

THIS FACTORY'S
BEEN IN MY FAMILY
FOR GENERATIONS.

WE NEVER WERE
A CLOSE FAMILY.

HA HA HA HA!

OH, BOY!
THIS IS SWELL!

THINK OF
THE DINNER PARTIES.

COME ON IN, BOYS!

I COULD FEED A FOREST!

I'M ROLLING
IN FERTILIZER!

OH, YOU'RE IN DEEP,
ALL RIGHT.

PUT 'EM UP!

GEE!

UGH. SEE WHAT
YOU MADE ME DO?

I HATE WHEN
THIS HAPPENS.

SAME HERE.
IT'S DISGUSTING.

LEAVE ME ALONE. YOU
THUMB-SUCKING FUNGUS!

DARKWING DUCK ALWAYS
GETS THE BAD GUY.

LOOK, I'LL PAY
YOU TO GO AWAY.

BUY YOURSELF
SOMETHING
IN GREEN, HUH?

SORRY, MR. MONEY TREE.

THIS DUCK'S NOT FOR SALE.

AND NEITHER
ARE MY COMPANIONS!

OH!

IT'S TIME YOU LEARNED
THAT CRIME DOESN'T PAY.

HUH?

GET 'EM, GUYS!

GUNS CAN'T HURT YOU!

AU CONTRAIRE.
I'M ABOUT TO
BLOW THEM AWAY.

I'M UP A TREE.

YOU CAN DEFOLIATE US,

BUT YOU
CANNOT DEFEAT US!

GET THE OTHERS.

WHOA!
WHOA!

EW, THIS STINKS.

NOW, THERE'S
AN UNDERSTATEMENT.

AAH!
HEY!

PUT THEM DOWN!

LET ME GO, TWIGGY.
I'LL TEAR YOU APART!

WAIT, BIG GUY.

WHAT ARE YOU GOING
TO DO WITH THEM?

MULCH THEM?
THAT'S AWFULLY FINAL,

NOT TO MENTION
EXTREMELY MESSY.

NO!

UGH.
UGH.
UGH.

BETTER PUT
A MOVE ON, KIDS.

LET'S SEE HOWYOU
LIKE THE HEAT.

OW! OW! OW! OW!

I'M GETTING TIRED.

HERE YOU GO, BUDDY.

HURRY, DARKWING!

I'M COMING, GOS!

OW! OW! OW!

GET HIM OUT!
GET HIM OUT!

COME ON!

STRETCH! QUICK--

START CLIMBING!

COME BACK, MONEY TREES!

I NEED YOU TO BUY A FARM.

OH, OW, OW!

WELL, HE BOUGHT IT!

WHAT FOLKS WON'T DO
TO SAVE A BUCK.

BUT HEY, THAT'S WHERE
GREED WILL GET YOU.

NO WONDER THEY SAY

MONEY IS THEROOT
OF ALL EVIL.

I GUESS THAT
MONEY TREE MANIA

GOT THE BETTER
OF ALL OF US.

SOME MORE THAN OTHERS.

SOME GOOD
CAME FROM IT--

HERB'S GETTING
A LOT MORE EXERCISE.

COME ON OVER, NEIGHBORS!
YOU CAN'T HARDLY MISS!

THAT'SCAN HARDLY MISS.

GUH...WHATEVER.