Danger & Eggs (2015-2017): Season 1, Episode 4 - Keep Off the Grass/Pennies - full transcript

KEEP OFF THE GRASS Layla is always bored. On a mission to prove to her how exciting the park is, D.D. ends up leading them to an wacky underground world. PENNIES When Phillip clears the pennies from the fountain, he un-wishes everyone's hopes and dreams. He and D.D. must make the city believe in itself again before everyone descends into depression.

-[clucking] -♪ A kid, an egg,
a park, they do stuff ♪

MAN: But there's...
there's more to it than that.

♪ It's kind of hard to explain

-Sort of like a... just...
-Aah! Butterflies.

-Kind of, sort of, just,
you know. -Huh?

♪ It's kind of hard to explain

♪ Ah... it's called
Danger & Eggs.♪

[air horn blows]

Whoo-hoo! Ping-Pong day!

Spirited competition.

Yeah! Wrist sports!



I'll take your fastest,
smoothest Ping-Pong ball,

please.

Leave a deposit.

So you return the dang ball!

BRB!

[wind whipping]

Backswing, connect, ricochet.

[inhales loudly
through nose]

Backswing, connect, ricochet...

[engine whirring]

[clears throat]

My deposit...

our most valuable possession,
my dad's scooter.

Take good care of it.



[muffled groaning]

-The Smack the Barber.
-Ball.

-Sugarwrist!
-Connection.

-The Mule Maker!
-Hit.

[groans]

Hi-yah!

Ow... I guess.

[gasps]
Are you okay?

Please! As acting sports
medicine medic,

it's my opinion, and that
of my esteemed colleagues, to...

Don't move!
Do you remember your name?

Do you believe
that NASA invented thunderstorms

to cover the sound
of space battles?

Layla... and maybe.

Nice to meet you, and...

[whispering]:
you're absolutely right.

Hey, really sorry.

I sometimes forget myself
when I'm, uh, rippin' pong.

It's okay.

It was
the most interesting thing

that's happened
in this boring place.

Not that it was interesting.

[gasps]
Boring place?!

I deem you healthy.
Feel free to walk it off.

While you're walking,
I got to show you

the not-boring, I-don't-know-
what-you're-talking-about

incredibleness of mypark.

I guess I can change my plans

from not having any
to now having one.

Wait! We need
to get your deposit back.

Allow me.

[groaning]

I'll need a minute.

First up... one of my fave spots.

-[bird cooing]
-I call it Breezy Face Point.

Uh, feel that on your face?

[bird groans, coos]

Tell me wind's not the best
of all invisible forces.

Eh, I guess it's less boring
than no wind.

I get it. Wind in the face isn't
in your face enough.

Well, hang on and prepare
to break the swing barrier!

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Swings are dirty pendulums.

Back and forth, over and over.

Thisis gonna make you fall in
love with this magnificent land.

The Irritable Beavers
of Puny Pond!

[beaver growls]

These guys hate plaid.

Take cover.
Things are about to get real!

[low growling]

-Uh...
-Oh, come on! [groans]

[D.D. gasps, beaver growls]

[D.D. grunting]

[laughs] Phillip will have
some not-boring ideas.

Phillip?
Whoa, what's that?

What? This?

Only Phillip's No-Touch Object
and Thing Getter.

Here. Buckle yourself in.

-[D.D. groans]
-PHILLIP: D.D.!

The extractor... isn't built...
for maneuvering.

[D.D. grunts]

I almost got it!

Um, Layla,
your assistance, please!

You're in good hands.

No! Sign! Sign!

I'm on the grass!
I'm on the grass!

Easy, pal.
Nothing's gonna happen.

They probably just planted
new gra... I'm stuck.

There's a reason
that sign says "Keep off the"

instead of "Welcome to the."

I'm sorry.

We're sinking.

Aren't we all?

[buzzing]

Didn't I tell you
this park has everything?

Now thisis not boring!

I guess, if you're into really
dark and glowing places.

[Phillip panting]

Easy, Phillip.
Just remember your techniques.

Breathing in, I calm my body.

Breathing out, I smile.

I feel the air on my arms.

I see the light and the shadows.

Let's look around.

I know I'm gonna find something
down here

that will make you
interested/happy.

[creature croaking]

Abandoned spooky laboratory?!

Oh, we are in business. Come on!

Yay. Outdated science.

-Whoa!
-D.D., I urge you

to bring along my two friends:
Care and Caution.

Look, Layla!
Old technology!

With buttons! Let's push!

The subjects have mutated
and broken free.

-[alarm sounding]
-We're sealing off the facility.

This sign serves as
a warning to future generations

of all mankind to stay... away!

[creature squealing]

[Phillip whimpers]

I feel the air on my arms.

I see the light and the shadows.

Whoa! Am I right?

Is this a "whoa" moment?

Layla, can I get a "whoa"?

I don't know the meaning
of the word "whoa."

Seriously, what does it mean?

[breathing heavily]:
I'll tell you what it means.

That thing could still
be down here.

As self-appointed danger
avoidance expert, we should go.

-[Layla yawns]
-Uh-huh.

No one's going anywhere
until Layla likes something.

Whoa. Whoa? Whoa.

[gulps]
I'm here to help.

A locked door is
nature's stop sign.

Come on, Phillip.

Aren't you curious?

An abandoned research lab?

Mutated animals?
Hint. Hint.

Mutated animals like my mom?

I'm just saying.

Let's check it out!

[touch tones sounding]

-[whooshing]
-Whoa.

-How did you do that?
-I tried

-my mother's DNA sequence.
-[eerie theremin music plays]

You play the theremin?

I did but I lost interest.

[liquid gurgling]

[eerie groaning, thudding]

-[gasps]
-Someone's in trouble!

D.D., wait!

We should come up with a plan.

[buzzing]

[grunts]

[buzzing]

Ah.

-Aw, a hideous giant fly!
-[buzzing]

Tell me
your brain isn't melting.

It's a fly, only bigger. Meh.

-Meh?
-D.D., look out!

[plant growling]

[Phillip whimpers]

-Whoa!
-[buzzing]

[panting loudly] Something
tells me it's time to go.

What is it?
Are you having a feeling

that's letting you know,

something deep in the back
of your mind, a special...?

Yes, because of that.

[insect chittering,
creature squealing]

Will you wake me up
when it's over?

Wake you?!

Oh, you'll get woke!

Ha! Hey, Pointy!

-[squeals] -PHILLIP:
D.D., what are you thinking?

-[creature snorting]
-Layla! How about this?

Throwing down
with a tentacle monster?

Anything? Huh?

I'm sort of nonviolent, so
the whole fighting thing... mm.

D.D., watch out!
You may already feel this,

but it's wrapping around you!

-[snorting]
-Oh!

D.D., grab this!
Layla, your assistance, please.

We'll pull her out.

[grunts]

PHILLIP:
Whoa! Um,

-I feel a tentacle on my arms.
-[groans]

I see the fading light
and the dimming shadows.

-I see... -[fly buzzing] -I
think it's coming back for us!

Who knew flies had such

a well-developed sense
of gratitude?

[D.D. groans, panting]

[grunts]
Ha!

-[buzzing]
-Hold on!

[gasps]

Hey, Layla, wild ride, huh?

Ugh, just another pendulum.

-Huh.
-[creature squealing]

-PHILLIP: Dangling!
-[buzzing]

Flying! Flying on a fly.

Flying on a fly.

-[gasps]
-[buzzing]

That's why they're called flies.

-[fly buzzes, D.D. grunts]
-PHILLIP: Whoa!

-[creature bellowing] -PHILLIP:
D.D., what are you doing?

I need my deposit back!

Smack the Barber!

[creature growling]

-[fly buzzing]
-PHILLIP: Whoa!

[bird cooing]

This barricade will make sure
that no one dares to enter.

Phillip, I may have gotten
a little too excited

trying to get Layla excited.

I shouldn't have put us
all in danger.

True, but I understand.

You and Layla are nottwo peas
in a pod.

You're two separatepeas
in two differentpods.

That were grown
on two different farms.

Maybe it's me.

I get so torqued up
about everything.

Maybe I can't tell
what's boring and what's not.

Well, the writer G.K. Chesterton
famously said,

"There are no boring subjects,
only disinterested minds."

So... it's not me, it's her?

Chesterton could not
have put it better himself.

Thanks, Phillip.

You're a pal.

-Hey.
-Uh... [gasps]

Sort of got distracted by this.

It looks like a perfect sphere,
but if you look really close,

there are tiny imperfections.

Isn't that a metaphor
for life itself?

Uh, how?

It has all these marks from the
Ping-Pong paddles hitting it.

So many blows, but it keeps
coming back for more,

never giving up.

Huh. I never thought of it
that way.

So happy I met you

and found the coolest thing
ever!

Oh! Can I keep it, please?

But my deposit.

[sucking loudly through straw]

Uh, sure.

I'll get it back some other way.

-Hmm?
-[grunts softly]

[fly buzzing]

[gasps]

[clucks]

[sighs]



Magnificent low-allergen day?
Check.

Airflow providing breathing
opportunities for my body?

[inhales]
Check.

A grateful planet
awaiting my assistance?

-Check.
-[squirrel chitters]

Chew 20... no... 50 times,
especially with food.

Hydrate yourself.

The road to success
is paved with fluids.

-[panting]
-[metal grinding]

Well, that's not good.

Coins, you should be hiding
in a couch,

or well-vaulted bank,

not the intake pipe condenser.

My path forward is clear.

[panting and grunting]

Yay! Whoo-hoo!

Hey, Phillip.
What's wrong with the fountain?

What's not wrong with the
fountain is more like it.

Well, one problem is that
it's missing all the pennies,

which is probably the problem.

In the name of proper
fountain maintenance

I donated said pennies
to a local charity.

Phillip! Those pennies
are people's wishes.

You un-wished them.

We've got to get 'em back.

-♪
-[cat meows]

-See?
-[cats mewing]

Those pennies made
these cats mobile.

Congratulations, everybody.

-Accessibility awaits.
-[bell dings]

Uh, we need a refund.

Uh, we gotta get back all the
pennies my friend gave you.

Oh, so sorry
you're not satisfied.

-Okay.
-[wheels squeaking]

Remove these cats' wheels

and put them back in their
sad little beds.

[cat mews]

Um... never mind.

Ooh, uh, we'll figure out
another way. Thanks.

Cats, continue.

[cats purring and mewing]

Aw.

This is bad.

This is really bad.

Someone, someone definitely
needs to call someone.

I'm surprised you're taking
wishes this seriously.

PIGEON LADY:
Merciful beans.

Where are my wishes?

[grunts]

-What seems to be the problem?
-[onlookers exclaiming]

Uh, there's no problem, Luke.

The wishes, the wishes.

You stole our wishes?

-Well, he'll get 'em back.
-Hold on, Lydia.

That giant egg
just stole our wishes.

Do you have any idea
what you've done?

Well, I would like to think

that I saved all of you
from a prison

of your own superstitions.

Maybe you didn't read the memo,
Phil.

You think I was born

with an itty-bitty baby version
of this suit on?

I'm rich and powerful
because I wished for it.

Wishing is how I got my badge.

♪ And my beautiful

-♪ Singing voice.
-[onlookers groaning]

Everyone, please.
Remain calm.

Have you all considered

that you got those
wonderful gifts

not because of wishing

but because of trying. Hmm?

I'm going to sue you
six ways to Sunday!

Lydia, patch me in to legal.

Anybody know the penalty
for grand theft wishes?

Seriously? No one does?

I do... No, I don't.

Wait!

Uh, I think I feel

a teachable moment coming on,
everyone.

Can you feel it?

Ha, D.D.

-Let's go get it.
-[weakly]: Uh-huh.

We want our wishes!

We want our wishes!
We want our wishes!

-[chanting continues
in distance] -[grunts]

Flexibility, knees... knees.

I don't know about this.

But-but you know who's good

at this crisis management stuff?

[whispering]:
The mayor.

As a self-trained expert

in crisis management stuff,

the trick is to give people
something better than wishes.

What's better than wishes?

Wisdom.

Ooh! I almost forgot
my confetti.

All right.
Greetings, Chickenpaw Park!

How's everyone doing today?

Good? I am. [laughs]
All right.

I went broke and I live in
Lydia's garage.

I got demoted to
Crossing Guard Luke. Ugh.

♪ I'm fl...

♪ I'm flying.

[baby cries]

People.

Please, remain calm and you may
learn something.

I am the Interim Emissary

of Teachable Moments,
and with me today

is our special guest D.D.

-Welcome.
-[D.D. whimpers]

Tell us, what did you wish for
in the fountain?

A puma, rocket pants, sideburns,

to be athletically awesome,

and mutton chop sideburns, uh...

"Athletically awesome" you say.

And did that come true?

Pretty much.
Yeah, definitely.

And now that your wish
has become "un-wished,"

what do you think will happen?

I will be a super klutz.

D.D. Danger, what if I told you

that your fear isn't real?

That it's all based
on something called...

confirmation bias?

Roll it, Squirrel.

[chittering]

My name is Penny,

and this is my good friend,
Birthday Candle.

Hi, I'm a candle.

What we both have in common

is, whether people
are tossing us...

Or blowing us out,

most people think
that we are lucky.

But the question is...
[whispering]: Play it.

♪ What... if...

♪ We're... not... lucky?

♪ What if it's just

♪ Superstitions
we were taught? ♪

♪ What if the truth

♪ Is we do nothing at all

♪ Like when you wished
for a bike ♪

♪ And got a meatball

♪ Or when you wished
for a boat ♪

♪ And you got strep throat.

People tend to listen to ideas

that support the way they think.

And they ignore ideas that
question what they think.

So whether it's believing
in lucky pennies

or believing that boys can do
more than girls can,

it's called confirmation bias.

Two, three...

So when you cling to things

that support your view

but reject the things
that never do,

you've got it,
you can't deny it...

Confirmation bias.

-Was that you in the movie?
-It was.

We're sad we lost our wishes,
but how do we know

that they really came true
in the first place?

[panting and grunting]

-Yeah!
-Lydia.

Buy, buy, buy!

Also, bye-bye.

-I'm moving out.
-[grunts]

Back in the saddle.

[vocalizing]

-[grunts and groans]
-[gasps]

Uh, that's never
happened before.

[scoffs] You can thank
your egg for that.

When he stole those pennies...

He stole our wishes.

Lydia!

I'm not concerned. They all just
need their confidence back.

And once you give them
another demonstration...

Uh-uh, I need my wish back.

But you don't,
you just need to keep trying.

You fell once, sure,

but it doesn't mean
you'll fall every time.

LUKE:
Stop.

Or don't.

I don't care.

So try again,

my athletically
awesome friend?

Phillip, I-I called the mayor.

D.D., I have everything
under control.

-We don't need the mayor.
-[helicopter whirring]

-[crowd cheering]
-♪

It's the mayor.

Okay, D.D., what's the update?

Our wishes are still gone.

You don't need wishes, D.D.

Wishes aren't gonna
make you strong.

No, they're not.

I see one strategy here.

-Re-wishing. -What?
-Really? That could work?

It'd better. How do you think
I got my helicopter license?

Friends of Chickenpaw Park,

let's take a moment.

Cross your fingers
on both hands.

Now, we close our eyes
and we re-wish

all of the wishes that have been
lost on this day.

Each of us has to wish together.

It doesn't work

unless we all do it as one.

-Why aren't you wishing,
Phillip? -[clears throat]

If I may, I think
that in many cases

we see what we want to see...

[crowd shouting]

I hear you,

and I validate your feelings,
oh, Angry Mob.

But let us not lay blame

-on any one egg.
-MAN: It's his fault!

[crowd shouting]

Fight or flight response,
Phillip.

-[panting]
-Get him.

Where is he?
He's gotta be here somewhere.

[grunts]

Over there.

D.D., they're hunting me down.

Reason with them, tell them all
about my belief syst...

-Not you. What are you doing?
-Re-wishing.

I'm sorry, Phillip.

I know you think it's dumb,

but I want to be the way I was,

and I'm not taking any chances.

[groans]

This is my last chance.

Please, Phillip?

-A wishbone takes two people.
-I, uh...

-I don't know.
-Just grab it, will you?

[Phillip grunts]

There is something
I have to tell you.

I did make a wish once.

-A long time ago.
-For what?

-You'll laugh.
-No, you can tell me.

[grunts]

-A suntan.
-[laughing]

Oh.
[clears throat]

Did it come true?

It most certainly did not.

So you just gave up?

Phillip. You have to try
wishing again.

Just because your wish
didn't come true once

doesn't mean
it won't come true this time.

Ready? One, two, three, go!

[both grunting]

Ooh!
[grunting and groaning]

D.D.!

I... w-w-wish for D.D.

to be athletically awesome
again.

LUKE:
There's the egg.

Look, a girl.

[grunting]

Oh, yeah!

[crowd exclaiming]

The squirt did it.

Memo to self:
we don't need wishes.

♪ We just need

♪ To believe in ourselves.

Thank you. Yes.

And thank you
for your gift of song.

Let us take a moment
for confetti.

Confetti.

Lydia, tell the planet I'm back,

and I'm going to buy it in cash.

Well, I guess I am an expert
in crisis management.

Self-trained.

You have a license
for that helmet?

You're free to go.

I'll see you later, Eggs.

So, Phillip,

now that I'm athletically
awesome again,

was it me... or was it a wish?

I'm not sure.

I may need to look at more data.

[whispering]:
But let's not tell them that.

♪ When you cling to things
that support your view ♪

♪ But reject the things
that never do ♪

♪ You got it,
you can't deny it ♪

♪ Confirmation bias.

[sighs]



[cats mewing]

MAN:
Well, look at you.