Creamerie (2021–…): Season 2, Episode 5 - Episode #2.5 - full transcript

- Move, move.

- Bobby, no.
- Back off.

Back up or she gets hurt.

I mean it.

Or I'll do it.

Look at you all.

You really think
that I killed her?

You think I shot her?

I killed the Prime
Minister?

- It had to have
been an accident.

Shouldn't we go back
and let them know



that it was an accident?
- Pip, I swear to God,

if you don't start
running down these stairs

I will come up there and
throw you down myself.

This was not an accident.

- What?

You think Bobby
shot her on purpose?

- Of course he didn't.

- Okay, okay I'm coming.

You know, it's
actually best practise

to put the slowest
person in the front.

- Bobby.

Oh shit, we need a car.

- Yeah, an armoured car.
- Look, bikes.

- Bikes.



- What no, hey.

- You take that one.

- Why do I have to take
the big unwieldy one?

- You snooze you lose.

- Hurry up, Pip.

- I need to adjust
the seat down.

There's usually a quick release.

Ah just ride
the fucking bike, Pip.

- This is huge.

So long, Freaks.

Bobby,
get in Pip's bike.

- Bobby.

- Piss off.

- Bobby, you've
got to listen to me

because right now it looks like

you may have killed
the Prime Minister

and we're the only ones who
know it was an accident.

You need to jump in my basket.

- What?

- Get in my basket.

- I'm not getting
in that basket.

- Do it.
- No.

- Hey stop, come back here.

- Get in my basket
if you want to live.

- We should swap.
- What?

- I should be cycling and
you should be in the basket.

- Really, sexism right now?

- It's not sexism
if I'm better at it.

Hurry up, Pip.

- I'm carrying double
to triple the weight,

I'm peddling as hard as I can.

- Oh my God, oh my God.

Holy shit.

- Go, go, go, go.

- Shit.

- Only way is down guys,

see you in hell.

- No, no, no.

Brake.

Shit.

- Why wouldn't you let me drive?

- What the hell?

- Yeah.

- Come on guys.

- I don't know what happened.

One minute I'm being
introduced as a national hero,

the next I'm being bloody framed

for killing the Prime Minister.

- Framed.
- Yes Pip, framed.

The gun I was
holding was ancient,

it was empty, it
didn't even work.

- Did you check?
- Yes, I checked.

What do you take me for?

- I know it wasn't you, Bobby.

Okay, I saw something weird
just before it happened.

It was so many camera flashes,

but I think I saw,

I think I saw Doc Garvey.

- What, where?

- Outside the press
gallery talking to Carla.

- The fuck?

- That doesn't even make sense.

Doc Garvey with
Carla would mean-

- Carla is with Wellness.

Which would mean-

- Wellness killed
the Prime Minister.

I'm fine.

- Okay, can we just
circle back for a minute?

- Circle back?

- There's got to be some
kind of rational explanation

for all of this.

- Pip, the only
rational explanation

is that the government
is a puppet show

and Wellness is
pulling the strings.

Nice one, I'll bring you
a mini-me to spy on us.

- Michelle is not a spy.

- Seriously, you're
gonna defend her

after she show ponied
her way on stage?

Oh, she seriously sucked you in

with that fan girl
shit, didn't she?

- Well maybe she did

because unlike my
supposed friends

who resort to
argumentum ad hominem-

- And here comes
the fucking Latin.

- Michelle was
actually supportive.

- Bobby.

- Well, I'm glad
you felt supported

while you were selling
us out to enemy.

Bobby.

- Relax, there's no gas in it.

- Where the hell
did you come from?

- Oh, I just got here.

See, this is my workshop

so I come and go as I please.

Where the hell
did you come from?

- Out of town.

- Is that right?

Take a seat.

- It's okay, we're
quite happy standing.

Okay just.

- Ladies.

- Thanks.
- Thanks.

- Cheers.

So, you in some kind
of trouble are you?

- No.

- On the run from the cops?

- We just need a lay
low for the night

- Probably wise.

It's not safe out there,

not after what happened
to the Prime Minister.

Cops on every corner,

vigilantes looking to
cash in that bounty.

- There's a bounty?
- Oh yeah, man.

10,000 big ones.

It's pretty fucking
stingy if you ask me

considering how much
sperm's worth these days.

I mean, think about how
much you could produce.

Fuck, even just once a
day if he died at 60.

That's what an average of three
mills a load by 30 by 365.

Wait, we're talking 30 litres.

Who's your friend?

- She's our accountant.

- Doesn't like to talk much.

- Yeah, she also has really bad
facial dermatitis and eczema

so she's quite
self-conscious about it.

But you know, we just need
her around for business

all the time.

- Accountant hey?

What are her rates? I
need a new accountant.

Shit, are those medals?

- Oh no, they're
her grandfather's.

You know, so just
sentimental value.

- There's a big
market for medals.

Big prices too if you
find the right buyer.

Tell you what,

if you are willing
to part with those

I can take you to a place
where the cops can't touch you.

- What sort of a place?

- A place for people who
don't want to be found.

- Hey.

- What is this place?

- These passageways were
built during the war,

now they are a bolt hold

for anyone who doesn't
love the Wellness shit show

taking over the
country above us.

Misfits, outcast, princesses.

Then you got your run on
the mill petty thieves,

con artists, black marketeers,

probably the odd murderer
from time to time.

- Is that coffee?

- Oh yeah, you can get
a lot of shit down here

that you can't get up top.

This lot don't believe the
pandemic even happened.

- We got a protest,
2 o'clock on Sunday.

- Oi girls leave
them, they with me.

Fucking conspiracy theorists.

- What about you?

What is it that you do?

- Merchant sea captain.

I ship precious cargo
in and out of ports

all over the world.
- You're a smuggler.

- I prefer maritime logistics.

Come on.

Welcome to the bunker.

She used to be a gunnery,

now she's home to every
shady fuck in town.

Isn't that right, Greta?

Come on, keep moving.

It's not a zoo, mate,

don't need to stare.

Alright, keep your heads down

and don't talk to anyone.

This man hunt's turned everyone
into wannabe bounty hunters.

All right.

Meet you back here at half past.

- Where are you going?

- To get the best price
I can for these medals,

I reckon.

- Just lay low,

don't talk to anyone,

don't make any eye contact.

I don't wanna have
to get into a fight-

- Move.
- Alex.

- Let's go and buy
some military shit.

- Alex.

She's so predictable.

- Actually, I need to
check something out too.

- What?

Jaime wait.

This it?

About this?

Shit.

What does a military
map even look like?

- Like a normal map.

- Shut up.

- I thought they
burnt all of these.

Those transfusion sets have
a high quality filter mesh,

you won't get any clogs.

- Oh, great.

- We used to use 'em in
the ambulance all the time,

really reliable.

- You're a doctor?

- Nah, eight years
as a paramedic.

- Wow.

- We should go, this place
is like a garage sale

for the violent and depraved.

- You all right?
- Yeah.

- Okay, just you're short
breath like you've been running.

- No, let's go.

- Thanks.

- What?

- Is this it?

Okay.

There's nothing there.

Are you sure this
is the right map?

- Yes.

- We need to find a boat.
- What?

- Mum wrote encrypted
coordinates in her notebook.

See, this is where
she wants us to go.

- I can't see anything.
- Yeah, neither can I.

- This map isn't
detailed enough.

This is the place.

There's something there.

- Do you have any idea what?

- No.

- Okay look Alex, I'm trying
to think laterally here,

but at the moment it's
a pretty big risk.

- Mum was onto something, okay.

I know she was.

Maybe it wasn't a cure,

maybe all her notes,

the baby teeth stuff.

Maybe she found the hack,

a way to continue our species

despite the virus
being in our systems.

- Is that even possible?
- I don't know.

But this,

this is where we
are gonna find out.

- No, I'm not leaving until
Lane pays for what she did.

- Shit, you're a
punctual lot, aren't you?

- You're a sea captain, right?

- Yes, ma'am.

- You got a boat?

- Oh yeah.

I have a very big boat.

- How much money
to take us here?

- Oh no, I don't take
passengers, sweetheart.

And even if I did,
you couldn't afford it

because these things
aren't worth shit.

Let's go live
to that announcement.

Today our country lost
an inspirational leader.

Her life's work can
and must continue.

After careful consideration,

we have selected a new
interim Prime Minister

with a proven track record
for uniting the people.

Please welcome your new leader,

Lane from the Hiro
Valley District.

- Good evening everyone.

I want everyone to
understand that I, like you,

am still reeling at
the reckless violence

we have witnessed today.

I assure you this
government will not rest

until these fugitives have
been brought to justice.

To that end, I am raising
the bounty tenfold.

100,000 credits in gold volume

to anyone who provides information
that leads to an arrest.

Today is the start of a new era.

The opportunity
to build a future

based on the tenants of Wellness

and the power of
nature to restore.

I feel that power
working in me now

Growing, kicking.

For years, we at Wellness have
dared to dream the impossible

that young girls and young boys

might grow up together
again, side by side,

and now our dreams are manifest

for this child growing
and kicking inside me now

is a beautiful, healthy boy.

- Fuck me.

I mean, your Prime Minister
sounds like a fucking nightmare.

Good news is for a
hundred thousand credits

of gold bullions,

I'll take you girls
anywhere you bloody like.

Just hand over the
fella in the helmet

and we'll be on our way.

- No, no deal, we'll
be leaving now.

- Is that right?

What do you reckon folks?

Are they leaving?

- Okay, okay, okay,
wait, wait, wait,

I've got a counter offer.

What?

- What could you
possibly have to offer me

that's worth more than a 100K

and 30 litres of white gold?

I'm listening.

I'm giving you 12 hours
to come up with the goods.

You get it done

and you've won yourself a
one-way voyage outta here.

You fail, and I'm taking helmet
head here to the authority

so I can claim that bounty.

Am I clear?

I said, am I clear?

- Crystal.

- Let me have a go.

- Let's go.

Shit.

- Where is all of it?
- I think this is it.

- That's the entire
national sperm supply.

- Hey, sound the alarm.

- Hey everybody.

- We can explain.

- Alex.
- What?

- If you're gonna
use the bathroom

at least give us a warning.

- The bathroom?
- You know what I mean.

- Of course I do.

It's just down the hall next
to the lounge, isn't it?

- Can you two stop it?

You look that way,
you finish your pee.

- What?

You are unbelievable,

what are you doing
we've only got one.

- Oh stop.

What the hell?

- Pip.

Pip, you're not like divvying
up the toilet paper, are you?

- Yes, yes I am.

- Okay, don't you think
maybe it's just a little bit-

- What childish?

Yes, completely unnecessary
between mature adults.

Absolutely.

But unfortunately Alex here

is deciding to behave
like a three year old

so there's very little option

but to stoop to her
childish levels.

- Oh I'm childish?

- Yes.

And maybe next time
you could think about

pulling up your pants before
starting an argument with me.

- Make me.

- What?

- I said make me.

- I'm not gonna make
you pull up your pants,

pull them up yourself.

Pull them up.

- Nah.

- Pull up your pants, Alex.
- No.

- I said pull up your pants.

- I said make me.
- Stop it.

- Stop being such a
negative force in my life.

You're so annoying.

- Stop, stop.

- Hey, what are you?

Don't touch her,
don't touch her.

You get away from that one

she's to be released
immediately.

- No, I'm not going
anywhere without them.

- That's fine.

- They are traitors of the state

and we're under
the strict orders

to keep them in the
high treason cell.

- I don't care what your
previous orders were.

This changes everything
we thought we knew.