Crazy Ex-Girlfriend (2015–…): Season 3, Episode 6 - Episode #3.6 - full transcript

♪ Crazy is when I go off the rails ♪

♪ This is what you've done to me ♪

♪ Crazy is how your
loving makes me feel ♪

♪ This is what I always want to be ♪

♪ I like it when a
girl gets crazy in bed ♪

♪ Don't mess with the bitch
who's crazy in the head ♪

- ♪ You do ♪
- ♪ You don't ♪

♪ Want to be crazy ♪

- ♪ And you don't ♪
- ♪ You do ♪

♪ Want to be crazy ♪

♪ To clarify, yes, no on the crazy ♪



♪ We hope this helps. ♪

What?

Previously on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend...

If I'm crazy,

you made me crazier

because your life is broken and boring.

I'm sick and tired of you!
I want you out of my life!

REBECCA: I've officially alienated

every person I know.

I give up.

I'll come home.

Darling, it's time that I take
over the reins of your life.

You're incapable.

You made me think that you loved me.



You gave me hope
when I had none.

And now, that hope is gone.

- Is everything okay?
- I need help.

_

Oh, sorry.

She's okay.

She's out of the woods for now.

- Oh...
- Oh, thank God.

I knew she'd be fine.

The minute I heard,
that's what I told myself.

All right, I got to get back in there.

Dr. Akopian is leaving,

and Rebecca needs somebody in
the room with her at all times.

Uh, they assigned a nurse to be
her “sitter” or something,

but I got rid of her.
And so, now,

all I have to do is fend off
a very overeager housekeeper

who just keeps
interrupting for no reason.

- VALENCIA: Paula.
- Yeah?

You don't have to do this by yourself.

We can help, we can take turns.

Yeah, you have a family at home.

Don't be silly. Rebecca needs me.

And my family will understand.

Actually, there is another
way you guys can help.

So, she knows everyone is
hearing about what happened.

I mean, her phone is blowing up...

Lots of concerned people,
really sweet, very annoying.

Could you please just let
everyone know that she's okay?

I could do it. I'll get
in touch with everyone.

I want to help.

- Oh, great.
- Hey.

- I got here as fast as I could.
- Why?

- Is Rebecca okay?
- For now. Josh, you need to leave.

I can't have Rebecca seeing you
or hearing you.

I don't want her to be upset.

In fact, I am worried

that your body spray is
gonna waft into her room

and she's gonna know that you're here,

so leave... without wafting.

(Paula sighs)

Dude, you should go.

But I want to talk to Rebecca.

I mean, last time I saw her,
we had a really bad fight

and I said I wanted her
to go away, which I did,

but not in, like, a permanent way.

Will you at least tell her I was here?

- No...
- No.

I'm so sorry, Dr. Akopian.

I failed you.

- God, I'm such a coward.
- You were no such thing.

No such thing.

You were brave. You asked for help.

Brave. Asked for help.

Just agreeing with you.

I'll let you get some
rest, but don't worry,

there are some great
psychiatrists on staff here,

and we'll work together
to get you the right help.

Thank you.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Are the girls still here?

Oh, yeah. No, we're all here.

# GirlGroup4Evah. (laughs)

- Are they mad at me?
- No.

- No one is mad.
- (door opens)

Not now, Denise!

Denise, what did I say?

Sweetie, do you need anything?

No, um, no, I think I'm
just gonna go to sleep.

Oh. Oh, God.

Oh, I'm so embarrassed
that I caused such a scene.

And I didn't, I didn't even want to die.

I just wanted the pain to stop.

I know.

(sniffles) It's like
I was out of stories

to tell myself that
things would be okay.

I just feel like I
inconvenienced a lot of people.

No, no, no, no. No, you didn't.

And don't you worry about
anyone else right now, okay?

- (sniffles) Okay.
- Okay.

♪ ♪

(clears throat)

_

(typing)

(reading words on screen): _

Hmm.

_

(clears throat)

_

- Hey, boss. So, the whole office...
- (clears throat)

... is going in on a
cupcake basket for Rebecca.

Do you want to kick in some money or...

probably doing your own thing?

Yeah. No, I'm-I'm doing my own thing.

Okay, so no money from you, then.

Because I do need an extra eight bucks

and I can't find Darryl.

Called and texted him.

He's at a yurt with his
boyfriend or something.

Uh, he probably doesn't
have cell service.

Are you okay?

This must be tough, and
I know you care about her.

- George, we're done here.
- For sure. Uh-huh.

(sighs) All right, I
just have to do this.

I'm gonna do it.

(phone beeps)

Hi, everyone, I'm Valencia Perez,

Rebecca Bunch's friend.

I wanted to just post a
quick update on Rebecca

because I know a lot of
people are worried about her.

Rebecca went through a tough
time a few days ago, obviously,

but she's stable now

and she appreciates
everyone thinking about her.

If you want to connect with her,

you can just write in the comments below

and I will make sure
she gets the message.

- Thanks, all.
- (phone beeps)

You're posting a video?

I thought you were gonna,
like, e-mail people.

Seemed impersonal.

I thought a Facebook
video would be better.

I asked Paula, and she
said Rebecca thought

it was a great idea.

Okay, sounds good.

Oh, where should I put these chips?

Um, why is he here?

Well, we were supposed
to go on our third date

and I was gonna cancel, but then
he didn't want me to be alone.

- (chuckles)
- That's sweet, right?

Yeah, sure.

I didn't know a friend's suicide
attempt was a plus one event,

but cool.

(quietly): I told you she might be mad.

She gets like this.

In third grade, she cut off my rat-tail

'cause I sat in her desk once.

Hector, just unpack the
cheese puffs... also, rat-tail?

So many questions.

Valencia, let's not be controlling.

I don't think there are, like,

rules for this kind of situation.

(sighs) You're right.

It's a tough time.

We should be gentle with each other.

- Bitch, don't get in my way, bitch.
- (yelps)

Are you sure you don't
need to go be at home?

What about your kids?

And... the girls... I mean,
they haven't been to their jobs

or anything in days; I just feel so bad.

It's fine, it is fine.

Paula,

I'm okay here by myself.

I mean, I got doctors and nurses,

- and Denise.
- (door opens)

Denise, I will strangle
you in your sleep!

(door closes)

Unbelievable.

(sighs)

Honey, do not worry about me.

(sighs)

I am where I should be,
which is right by your side.

How's your throat feeling?

Still a little scratchy from the
stomach pump and the barfing.

Ugh, it was like all six
months of my college bulimia

happened in one day.

That was sassy.

Sassy... my girl is still sassy.

Mama, what's gonna happen
when I get out of here?

Tell you what, let's not
worry about that right now.

Because you are doing
everything you're supposed to.

You met with a doctor,

that... very nice-looking Dr. Shin,

or, as I like to call him, Dr. Dan.

Or, even better, Dr. Damn...

- because he is so cute.
- Hmm.

You were honest and brave.

And they said that in a couple of days,

you can go home.

But that's what I'm nervous about.

Once I go home...

how will things be different?

I... will not let you leave
here without a plan.

Okay.

♪ ♪

VALENCIA: Hey, all. Thank you so
much for all your comments.

Rebecca feels so encouraged and
she's making a lot of progress.

I've read a lot of your comments to her

and they really cheer her up.

Now, get your liking fingers ready,

because Rebecca is going home today.

Yeah, she's talking to the
doctor, like, right now.

One sec, guys, BRB.

You ruin a shot again
and I will put you in ICU.

HEATHER: He's just trying to go

to the bathroom, and
it's right behind you.

No, no, it-it's fine. I
can get out of the shot.

I'll just crawl on the floor.
I'm sure they mop it frequently.

Are you done talking?

Rebecca's friends are waiting

for their daily dose of inspiration.

And they're gonna
think something is wrong

or maybe feel upset, I don't know.

(exhales)

Like I was saying, our little
Becky Girl is going home.

Yay.

You okay?

Need me to wipe anything?

REBECCA: Uh, no, it was weird
last time when you did that.

Yeah, I shouldn't have looked you
right in the eyes. Copy that.

Paula?

I know exactly what's
gonna happen today.

Dr. Shin, he's gonna
prescribe me a bunch of meds,

like doctors always do,
and they're not gonna work,

and I'm gonna end up back here.

Wait, wait, wait.

Let's give the guy a chance.

Remember? Dr. Damn... is good people.

Dr. Damn... it's funny
that you call him that.

These are the moments
when I used to laugh.

So, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Hello, Rebecca.

How we feeling today?
“We,” sorry, that's lame doctor-talk.

How are you feeling today?

Um, I, um, all right.

PAULA: So, you're springing
our girl today.

I can't wait to get
her back home with me.

You two live together?

Oh, no, no, no. No,
I live with my husband

and kids, but you know,
my focus is Rebecca

right now, so I will be

driving her and staying with
her and sleeping in her bed.

- In her bed?
- Yes.

Oh, I'm sorry, have you never
had a best friend before?

Because you should talk
to someone about that.

REBECCA: O-Okay, so, um,
all right, Doc, tell me what to do.

Um, first question, how
many meds am I gonna be on?

Uh, can you give me the daytime
version of whatever it is?

Because all of the other
meds I've been prescribed

have made me numb or drowsy or...

Actually, your treatment protocol
is not centered on medication.

- Wait, what?
- Yeah, how is she supposed

to get better with no medicine?

Oh, there may be some, but
it's not the main focus.

Rebecca, in my opinion, you've
been misdiagnosed over the years.

It's one of the main reasons
you've been struggling.

I think, with the right
diagnosis and treatment,

you can get a lot better.

Wait, so you have a
new diagnosis for me?

So I'm not anxious or OCD

or depressed or any of
the vague combo of things

people have told me I am?

- Oh-oh, my God. What am I?
- Great questions,

but I don't want to
get ahead of treatment.

Okay? We're gonna talk about all that

and the steps towards your recovery
later today at the clinic.

Wow, this is huge.

- I'll see you then, okay?
- Okay.

Bye.

Paula, did you hear what he said?

I have a new diagnosis. A new one.

♪ ♪

He just opened up

a whole new future of
possibilities for me.

A new path for my life.

♪ For almost 30 years, I've
known something was wrong ♪

♪ But Mom said weakness
causes bloating ♪

♪ So I tried to be strong ♪

♪ Fake it till you make it ♪

♪ That's how I got by ♪

♪ And when I tried
to find the reason ♪

♪ For my sadness and terror ♪

♪ All the solutions
were trial and error ♪

♪ Take this pill, say this chant ♪

♪ Move here for this guy ♪

♪ But now, there's
no need for regret ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm about to get ♪

♪ A diagnosis ♪

♪ A diagnosis ♪

♪ Don't tell me, “No,
sister, you don't fit in” ♪

♪ Doc, prescribe me my
tribe, give me my throng ♪

♪ Tell me that this
whole time I've belonged ♪

♪ With those other
people who share ♪

♪ My diagnosis ♪

♪ What could it be?
What could be right? ♪

♪ Schizophrenic or bipolar lite? ♪

♪ I've never heard voices ♪

♪ But maybe it's time to start... ♪

VOICES: You're super cool, Rebecca.

Thanks.

♪ Obsessives with numbers ♪

♪ Hoarders with cats ♪

♪ I could really
rock a tinfoil hat ♪

♪ Perfect they're not,
but at least they know ♪

♪ Who they are ♪

- (gasps)
- _

♪ No more bad pills,
fads or tricks ♪

♪ Who says there isn't an easy fix ♪

♪ With a diagnosis ♪

♪ I'm ready to blow this ♪

♪ Joint, and by joint, I mean
my inner sense of confusion ♪

- VOICES: ♪ You said that confusingly ♪
- Shh.

♪ I'm aware mental
illness is stigmatized ♪

♪ But the stigma is worth
it if I've realized ♪

♪ Who I'm meant to be ♪

♪ Armed with my diagnosis ♪

♪ Oh, the doctors that I've met ♪

♪ Who didn't get me ♪

♪ This one naturopath ♪

♪ Used feathers to pet me ♪

♪ They said anxiety,
insomnia were my affliction ♪

♪ The naturopath said
it was sex addiction ♪

♪ But all those things
I knew I wasn't ♪

♪ Yes, I like penises,
but who doesn't? ♪

♪ So put me in a
bottle, slap a label on ♪

♪ List out the side effects,
then worries begone ♪

♪ 'Cause finally, I'll know this ♪

♪ My diagnosis! ♪

- (exhales)
- Welcome to your therapy, Rebecca.

_

Okay. Diagnosis time. Hit me.

Okay. Now, it's
important to keep in mind

that nobody's diagnosis is
simple or covers everything.

- Yep, yep, yep, yep.
- It's also important

to not look up the diagnosis online

before we have a chance
to get into it, okay?

Got it. I will not look up anything,

if you don't want me
to. I'm a good student.

I will stick to the
required reading, sir.

Rebecca, I am noticing
how energetic you are.

That's not uncommon
after a suicidal event.

Too energetic. Sorry. Sorry, um, sorry.

I'm-I'm calm now, this
is my calm, low voice.

Okay, so,

based on my conversation
with Dr. Akopian

and our meetings at the hospital,

it is my belief that, while
you do have some symptoms

of anxiety, depression, OCD

and possibly PTSD...

Right. But I've heard
all those things before,

- and you said this was a new thing.
- I'm still talking.

- Sorry.
- It is my opinion

that you exhibit many
of the characteristics

of borderline personality disorder.

Wow. O-Okay, um...

First question... what is that?

Well, a person with BPD
is essentially someone

who has difficulty
regulating their emotions.

Someone that lacks the
protective emotional skin

to feel comfortable in the world.

Wow.

Um, just a couple questions, um...

How did I get BPD? Is BPD curable?

How serious is BPD?
Is BPD easy to fix?

Is BPD genetic? Did I get
the BPD from my mother?

I got it from my mother, right?
Again, just, like, rapid fire.

Just, like, answer.
Don't think about it.

Okay, I never fall for “rapid fire.”

Rebecca, I know you have a lot
of questions. I understand.

And we'll talk about
it a lot more, luckily,

in your group therapy, which
is where we're headed right now.

So you're just gonna pull a
Yoda and not tell me anything

I want to know before I'm
ready to know it, yeah?

That's what this is?

Hot-ass doctor, telling me not
to look things up online.

Oh, I'm gonna look things up online,

hot-ass doctor. All right.

“What is borderline
personality disorder?”

(exhales)

_

_

_

_

_

_

Nope.

No. No, no, no. No.

So, guys.

Guys, guys, guys.

Day five, part two.

Rebecca is at the outpatient center

getting wonderful treatment.

And meanwhile, back at the ranch,

we've stocked up on all of
her favorite... comfort carbs.

My girl loves her sugar, salt and dough.

Now, all of you supporters out there,

Rebecca's big #Bunchafriends,

I want you to know that
her heart is strong,

her spirit is bright, and she...

Did you tell all your bots

that we had to take all
the knives out of the house?

Also, maybe ask them if they know

how to jailbreak an
avocado, because I do not.

Heather, we're live.

- Okay.
- (door opens)

Oh, my God, guys, she's here.

Guys, guys, guys, let's see how it went.

(door closes)

- Okay, let's put that away.
- (phone beeps)

REBECCA: So, um, I got the worst
diagnosis ever, basically, um...

Yeah, I really hate it.

It's, uh, called borderline
personality disorder,

and I read two and a
half sentences about it,

and they were the worst sentences ever,

and I don't want to know any more.

(crying): And it's all just awful.

(phone beeps)

(mouthing)

Oh, my God. Stop.

“Wishing you the best

“after your suicide attempt.

“Yours, Nathaniel J. Plimpton III,

Esquire.”

Yeah.

(exhales)

(panting)

- (groans)
- What's up, boss?

Uh, nothing.

Uh, just had a little
weird déjà vu moment.

So glad you called me in...

- I did no such thing.
- ... because we are planning

to visit Rebecca at home this weekend.

I'm kind of nervous,
'cause I'm terrible with death.

When I was a kid, my dog died.

- I was the one who found him,
- all, like, splayed out,

eyes rolled into the back of his head,

his tongue hanging out.

It's, like, burned into my brain...

Stop it!

Oh.

I'm sorry.

Don't worry about me.

I'm a cat guy now.
I have a cat named Andromeda...

I got to go.

Are... you...

Just get out of my office.

Okay, well.

So you didn't go to group
therapy, you just blew it off?

No, I didn't go.

I was too upset.

I mean, I don't have an illness,
I have a personality disorder.

It's not something I
have, it's something I am.

This is what I've feared
my whole life. I'm broken.

Honey, what did I say to
you over and over in the car?

You are not broken.

You're wonderful.

VALENCIA: She's right.

You are an inspiration
to hundreds of people.

There is a Facebook group in Venezuela

that's completely devoted to you.

It's called El Buncho Valiente.

Oh, my God, seriously, stop.

Okay, listen, Rebecca, if you
hate this diagnosis so much,

then, let's get a second opinion.

Second opinions are very common.

And, you know, this new doctor,

he just met you.

He doesn't know you yet.

And who says we just have to sit here

and accept his diagnosis
with a capital “D”?

We don't have to just take his “D.”

Who says his “D" is so great?

No, you're right. He
should get to know me better

before he shoves his
“D” down my throat.

Yeah. What we should do,

is get another “D.”

And then we'll have two Ds.

You know, one here, and one there,

and we'll just...

- figure out which “D” you like better.
- Okay, let's calm down.

Rebecca, we can ask Dr. Akopian.

Oh, my God, Paula, you're totally right.

I mean, she knows me
way better than Dr. Shin,

and she never said anything
about a personality disorder.

I mean, she likes me a lot.

I-I thought Dr. Akopian
consulted with Dr. Damn

on your diagnosis?

She may have, but... no.

I-If she knew how much
I hated this diagnosis,

and how upset it was
making me, she'd be pissed.

I mean, Dr. Akopian only
wants me to be happy,

and this is not what happy feels like.

All right. Let's go. I'll drive.

Okay.

I do recommend an appointment.

Maybe don't crawl
through her doggie door.

Hmm. How do I spin this
for the worldwide audience?

- (door closes)
- (phone beeps)

Oh...

(piano playing softly)

- (knocking on door)
- (door opens)

Father. Mother.

Nathaniel, martini time
cannot be interrupted.

The timing is crucial.

That skin of ice on the top,

it melts in seconds.
Melts. I know, I know.

Oh, it's okay, darling.
He came all this way.

What is it, Nathaniel?

W-Would you like a martini?

- No, no. I need answers.
- I don't like your tone.

Mom.

When I was ten, did you
try to kill yourself?

Not now, Bernice!

Did you?

NATHANIEL: I have this... memory.

I was ten years old, and I
heard something fall over.

And I went to your room, and I saw you,

Mom, passed out on the floor.
And your eyes

were rolling back in your head.
And I tried to wake you up...

Nathaniel, enough.

And Dad told me to go
to my room, and I did.

And then the next thing
I know, you were gone

for, like, a month. And everyone said,

“Don't talk about it.
Don't ask questions.”

So I didn't.

But now I really need
to know what happened.

You know what happened.

Your mother had the
flu and got dehydrated,

so she went sailing for a month

- with your Aunt Sissy in Rhode Island.
- That's right.

I brought you back that
anchor key chain, remember?

It wasn't the flu. Come on.

There were sleeping
pills. There was a bottle

of pills on your nightstand,
and you wouldn't wake up.

We told you what happened.
This conversation is over.

It's not over.

Look, I need to know the truth.

My friend just tried to kill herself,

and I can't reach out to her at all,

because every time I think about her,

I picture this... lifeless body.

And it makes me think of you that night.

And I get panicked and I can't breathe.

And I don't know what that is.

And, I'm sorry, also, who
goes sailing for a month

when they have the
flu? That's not a thing.

That's a terrible lie.

- Please tell me the truth.
- Nathaniel, stop this now.

This isn't how we raised you.

Mom?

Please.

Oh, Nathaniel, I hate
to see you so upset.

But it's-it's just so
unpleasant to dredge up the past.

(clears throat) Now,

why don't you join us for dinner.

We're having lamb tonight.

And-and then you can
come out and see my roses.

They're looking

so healthy...

Will you please just answer me?!

(sighs)

(exhales) I think I'd
better go lie down.

I suddenly have a terrible headache.

Mom, I'm sorry. I...

You upset her.

Something's happened to you

since you started working
in that new office.

You're getting peppery,

and I don't use that word lightly.

Now, congratulations,
you've ruined our evening.

And we were having lamb.

Get out of my house.

VALENCIA: So, guys, I want to
send a special thank you

to Shimmer Glimmer
Cosmetics for sending over

those amazing and gorgeous
lip glosses to Rebecca.

I'm wearing one right now,
and she is going to love them.

There's nothing wrong
with a little pampering

in a tough time... Just
plain ol' self-care.

And, remember, if you
don't like the shade,

Shimmer Glimmer will
send you a different one

- for free... Wait. Okay.
- No, that's enough. I've had it.

- Wait, no! (grunts)
- I've had it. I'm going to murder you.

What is wrong with you?

You're using your friend's
crisis to get swag?

I mean, not to judge, V, like, at all,

but what you're doing is
pathetic and vain and stupid

and cringey and trendy
and selfish and basic.

(gasps) Oh, my God. Wait, hold up.

You think this is about me?

- Yes.
- Are you blind?

This has way transcended any one person.

Rebecca's story and her courage

and my courage sharing her courage

is inspiring an entire movement.

And that's what people want to feel...

Inspired, not sad.

And that is what I give them...

Hope and joy

and, yes, makeup tips and gorgeous hair.

Oh, my God, you're so full of it.

You're, like, so full of crap.

No, I'm not.

I'm full of something else.

♪ ♪

♪ There's a rumbling within me ♪

♪ Something I just can't ignore ♪

♪ I thought I could contain it ♪

♪ I can't hold it in anymore ♪

♪ It started as just a trickle ♪

♪ Loose and undefined ♪

♪ Now it's starting to solidify ♪

♪ Into something we
can all get behind ♪

♪ This is my movement ♪

♪ Can't stop this movement ♪

♪ It's coming out fast
in a powerful blast ♪

♪ From deep inside of me ♪

♪ Like an explosion ♪

♪ Of built-up emotion ♪

♪ Oh, I wanna scream and shout ♪

♪ I got to let it out ♪

♪ 'Cause this movement
is bigger than me ♪

♪ My movement's getting stronger ♪

♪ There's no containing it ♪

♪ I can't wait any longer ♪

♪ I've really, really got to ♪

♪ Sh... ine a light on this issue ♪

♪ ♪

♪ I know what you mean ♪

♪ I work at a hotline
for suicidal teens ♪

What's your hashtag?

We don't have one. It's a call center.

Yeah, that's not a movement.

♪ Mine is a movement ♪

♪ A big ol' stinky movement, oh ♪

♪ It's gonna be a beauty,
'cause it's my duty ♪

♪ To spread it all over the world ♪

♪ I'm gonna spread it ♪

♪ All over the world. ♪

It sounds like you're
just talking about poop.

What? No.

I rarely poop. It's been a month.

♪ ♪

So, I'm glad to see you here again.

How has everything been
going? How are you feeling?

Uh, not great. Still have
the same problem.

I'm so happy, and I feel
so good all the time.

And that's hard, because

I know not everyone feels that way.

- And that makes me sad.
- I hear you.

And that's wonderful.

But maybe we could circle back
to what you told me last week.

About your mother shooting
your father in cold blood

in front of you on your birthday.

Oh, I've moved beyond that.

(chuckles)

Dr. Akopian, we need to talk to you.

Excuse me. You can't
just burst into my office.

It's okay. It's fine.

Rebecca tried to kill herself.

She needs this more than
I do. Really, I'm good.

- Like I said.
- PAULA: See?

- Kevin is fine with it.
- Go get 'em, champ.

Me and all the Bunchafriends,
we're cheering you on.

No! Kevin!

(sobbing): Why, Mommy, why?!

Rebecca, this is highly inappropriate.

I'm so sorry. I know, I
know. But it's an emergency.

- I think I've been misdiagnosed.
- Yeah.

They told her she had some
stupid personality thing.

REBECCA: Okay, and I know that
Dr. Shin consulted with you,

but I think he tricked you
into giving me that diagnosis

by mansplaining you into it.

Rebecca, did you talk to Dr. Shin?

- Did you go to your group therapy?
- No, I did not.

Because I don't want to
hear any more about it.

I know it's wrong. I know
in my heart it's wrong.

So just give me a new thing,
okay? Give me the thing I know

you want to give me. Right?
'Cause it's a better thing.

One, two, three, go.

JOSH: So, um,

okay, I'm ready.

Give it to me straight.

What is Rebecca saying about me?

I've been there basically every day.

Haven't heard your name once.

You don't have to shield me.

I can take it.

I am responsible for someone
almost taking their life.

Look, from what I picked
up in the hospital...

And I'm in the inner circle;

I provide snacks, advice,

and an outlet for
Valencia's aggression...

Being suicidal has nothing to do

with any one life event or person.

It's more of a general
mental illness thing.

Um, yeah. Well, Rebecca
has been obsessed with me

since she was 16. I ruined her.

Suicide is a cardinal sin,
and I almost sin-assisted.

No, this is on me, man.

I-I've got to do something,

see Rebecca, make things right.

(sighs)

Or you don't.

Or I do.

Or you really don't.

I do, though.

I don't think you really do.

Except that I do, I think.

I don't think so.

AKOPIAN: Rebecca, it sounds

like you don't have accurate
information about borderline.

Dr. Shin asked you not
to look it up online,

- but I'm suspecting that you did.
- So what?

Yeah, I did. So what? All right.

Why don't we take a sec
and look at the checklist,

see if anything resonates.

- What checklist?
- To determine

whether or not a person has BPD.

A checklist sounds like
homework. You like homework.

Wait, why don't we just hear
it and then see what we think?

I mean, I am right here.
I am right next to you.

Yes, you are.

Which is a whole nother
thing we should talk about.

- I don't... I don't...
- All right,

in order to receive a diagnosis for BPD,

a person has to have at least five

of the following nine tendencies.

Just keep an open mind.

Okay? Okay, the first one is

severe mood swings.

♪ ♪

(chuckles) Well, we'll see about that.

(both laugh)

We'll see about that.

Profound fear of abandonment.

Josh. Hey, no, Josh!

Instability in relationships.

It's like you think I'm your
daughter or something, but I'm not.

Unstable sense of identity.

I don't know who I am if
you're not in my life anymore.

Paranoia or dissociative episodes.

What? Robert.

No!

Excessive and frequent anger.

Stop running, you coward!

Feelings of emptiness.

My womb is empty, like my life.

Impulsive behavior.

(moaning)

And, finally,

recurring suicide threats or attempts.

Oh, my God.

I know.

So not you, right?

(chuckles)

Paula,

all those things were me.

I don't have five... I have nine.

(sighs)

(crickets chirping)

Hey. How'd it go?
Did you get a new diagnosis?

No. Uh, same one.

But it's right.

Yeah, the verdict's in.
I am officially, medically,

certifiably “crazy.”

Well, no one said anything about crazy.

Um, so, look, I-I
appreciate everyone's support.

And I love you guys. I really do. But...

I'm very tired, so...
I'm just gonna go to bed.

Alone.

I'm sure she just needs to rest.

(door lock clicks)

Good morning, Mother.
Nathaniel, you're back.

I waited for Dad to leave.

Mom, I came back

because I wanted to apologize

for how I acted last night.

Oh, no, that's okay.

I know you don't like
to rehash the past,

and I respect that.

I'm not trying to make
you feel bad, really.

I know we don't say this stuff
in our house, but...

I love you, Mom.

And I want you to know
that if you ever need me,

I'm here.

And you're right...

These roses, they really are beautiful.

Nathaniel, wait.

When you were ten, I was
going through a hard time.

I made a mistake with my sleeping pills.

Then I went away for a while

to a place where I learned
to sleep without pills.

There was some sailing there. Not much.

Anyway, you're right.

I should have told you.

Wow.

Did we just have a talk?

- I think we did.
- (both laughing)

- (gasps) Don't tell your father.
- Oh, no, I won't.

Do you want to take some of
these roses to your friend?

I think she'd like them.

What are you guys doing?

- Oh...
- (groans)

Um, just having a sleepover.

Yeah, the floor's so
cozy, I slept great.

All right, guys,
sorry, I got to pee, so,

- I've just got to...
- Oh.

- All right, just watch your step.
- O-Okay.

I can go to the bathroom by myself.

- Yeah, I mean, sure.
- Totally.

- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.

Yeah.

Okay, we can't do this.

She's gonna sleep, she's
gonna go to the bathroom,

she's gonna cut bagels...
We have to get used to it.

(gasps) Oh, my God, I just remembered.

I left toenail clippers in there.

You clip your nails at my house?

My toenails grow really fast,

and they're super-thick
so I carry these

heavy-duty nail clippers on me.

Okay, okay, let's just, like, calm down.

She's not, like, gonna kill herself

- with your nasty, oversized clippers.
- All right.

(sighs) Let's calm down.

And I'm just, I'm knocking on the door

and see if she's okay, that's all.

Rebecca?

Becca?

(jiggling locked doorknob, knocking)

Becky?

Okay, she's not answering.

- (knocking on door)
- (ear-buds): ♪ Yes, no on the crazy ♪

♪ We hope this helps. ♪

What?

She never locks the bathroom door.

Heather's right. Let's not panic.

Okay, all right. (gasps)

What are you doing?

This is my intruder ax. I
can't just stand out here.

I thought you put all
the sharp things away.

I live in a famous murder house.

You think I don't have an ax?

Do it! Do it!

- Just chop it down.
- Just chop it...

(screaming)

Hey, girl.

How was your pee?

What is going on?

Okay, so we may have
been a touch worried.

You didn't answer the
door when we knocked.

I had ear-buds in.

- Oh, ear-buds.
- Ear-buds, right.

In your ears, so you couldn't...

Makes total sense.

I'm sorry to worry you
guys. Look, I was in there

doing this thing that I sometimes do

to make sense of things, I was...

listening to music and
watching music videos and, yeah.

Oh, yeah, cool, because we just thought

- you were killing yourself.
- (sobbing)

We thought you were dead.

We thought we were gonna open the door,

and you'd be all kinds of dead.

I'm so afraid you're gonna die, Rebecca.

I'm so scared. (sniffs)

I have never had a
friend like you before.

I... almost lost you.

And I have been telling all
these people... to have hope,

when, really, I am so sad and so scared,

and I have to poop so, so bad.

- Oh, honey.
- Oh.

(Valencia sobs)

Rebecca, please.

Promise me you'll never do it again.

I... I would lo... I would
love to promise you that.

I'd love to promise you all that.

But I can't.

Look...

The way I felt on that plane, I don't,

I don't ever want to
feel like that again.

And now that I know... what I have,

I hope I can get the help that I need,

but... the truth is,

I don't know what the future holds.

So I just can't promise
anything to anyone, even myself.

You know, for someone who's “crazy,”

you sound pretty sane.

Thank you, Heather.

And I'm so sorry that
I put you through this.

Really.

- Where is she?
- (gasps)

Where's my girl? Oh, I
came as soon as I heard.

She's fine, but what happened to you?

WiJo and I were in a
yurt, totally off the grid,

and for one second, I got cell service,

and all these messages came through,

and I saw what was happening with you,

so I borrowed this tank top from
WiJo because it was so hot out,

and then I hopped in my
car, but it wouldn't start

because the battery died,

so I found a guy in
one of the other yurts,

and I borrowed his car,
but it was a convertible.

And there was so much traffic
coming from the desert.

So I just drove three hours in the sun.

And I didn't stop for sunscreen.

I had a hat but it fell
off after five minutes.

I knew I was burning, but
I had to come see my girl.

- Who needs skin?
- Oh.

- Oh. No, no, no. I'm sorry.
- Sorry, sorry. Sorry, sorry, sorry.

- You've been through so much.
- No, Darryl,

I want to apologize...

for all the horrible
things I said to you

before I left for New York.

It w... they were,
they were all terrible.

I want to apologize to all of you guys.

You know I didn't
mean any of that stuff.

I know that. We know that.

- Of course we do.
- Absolutely. No question.

(overlapping chatter)

DARRYL: I swear to God, when I
get my hands on that Josh Chan...

When I get my hands on that jerk,

I'm gonna give him a piece of my mind.

Because you know what?

I could murder Josh right now.

I do have an ax.

Good. This is all his fault.

REBECCA: Darryl, calm down.

This is not Josh's fault.

I mean, it feels weird
to even say Josh's name.

I-I haven't thought about him in days.

Truly. I mean, it-it's almost like...

Josh is irrelevant.

It's not even about Josh.

Maybe it never was.

Oh, Darryl, honey,
let's-let's get you in...

I don't know, some sort of ice bath.

DARRYL: What does it
mean when it blisters?

REBECCA: Oh. Okay.

No one touch him. No one touch him.

So I'm here.

And I'm ready to face it all.

And I'm ready to start
group therapy, too.

I think you'll like it.

Everyone is really nice and supportive.

But, like, nuts, right?

(laughs) Let's go.

But you didn't answer me.

Are they, are they all terrible?

(sighs)

You were not supposed to see me.

I didn't know you delivered stuff.

This your side hustle?

(chuckles)

Oh.

Oh, these are beautiful.

Wow, this is really sweet.

Well, I mean it.

I do.

I'm here for you.

Thank you.

That really means a lot.

I got a... I should get inside.

I got a workbook in therapy today,

and I love workbooks, so...

You like to work?

That's the first I've heard of it.

(laughs)

Oh, wait. Um,

ju... um, brought this.

Oh, my God,

I was wondering where
Ruth Gator Ginsburg went.

Thank you.

I'm, uh...

I'm glad you're home.