Chuck (2007–2012): Season 1, Episode 11 - Chuck Versus the Crown Vic - full transcript

Hi, I'm Chuck.
A few things you might need to know.

It was nice knowing you.

Oh, my God, Bryce.

-How are you still alive?
-It's complicated.

You're still in love with me.

I guess this means
we're not getting back together.

-We'll always have Omaha.
-What did Bryce mean by Omaha?

A code. Contact point of some sort.

Bryce is going deep, Chuck.

No calls home, no messages out.

Sarah wants to join up with him,
she has to do it now.



What is that?
-Whoa.

What's that squiggly thing?
What did he bet on?

Gimel. I win. Ah.

You sure?
-Yes, yes.

Gimel beats he.

Pay up, buddy.

-Okay, I thought he was the best.
-Yes, I know you think so.

Anna, this is the Parcheesi of my people.
Don't question, hand over the cash.

I apologize.

Decided to take up bird watching?

-Just breathing in the view.
-Hmm.

I know that grunt.

Yeah, that's the Number 7, right?
Skeptical with a side of cynicism.

Just clearing my throat.



Just couldn't help but notice Agent
Walker's car isn't in her usual spot.

Oh. I didn't, uh....

It's weird. I didn't notice,
I didn't see that at all.

Fine, maybe I did. So?

Have you talked to Sarah?

Agent Walker and I don't do
a lot of fraternizing off hours.

Guess we'll just have to see.

See....

See what? Why? See what?

See if she's had enough
of the good life here with you.

See if she's hightailed it
to wherever Bryce is hiding himself.

Is that an option?

Oh, don't worry.

There's a great selection of new handlers
in this year's CIA Christmas catalog.

Are there? Thanks a lot.

She's a liar. Not to be trusted.

-What's that?
-Women.

They're so elusive.
So unknowable, okay?

Wrap you in this sweater lies,
and it keeps you warm...

...but makes your neck itchy.

-Who are we talking about exactly?
-Anna.

Never trust a woman
whose name is a palindrome, okay?

Uh, how do you know she's a liar?

I wait outside her house last night.
I saw her get picked up.

Then dropped off
three hours and 24 minutes later.

She's cheating on me.

-My Anna-banana is cheating on me.
-In the bushes?

-Well, I brought a sandwich, you know.
-Oh.

Listen, she's lying to me, okay?
And a relationship is built on trust, Chuck.

Sex and trust. Am I right?

Yeah, yeah.
Two big prerequisites, I guess.

What's cool is you and Sarah
are so pure and simple, you know?

Ever wish you were born,
like, a dog or a dolphin?

Dr. Dre?

Who's cheating on Dre, man?
-Text here.

Uh, we got an install job
over in Marina del Rey.

Okay, well, go with God, fellas.

No. Big Mike says you have to come.

You know that Jeff's
not to be left unsupervised...

...around holidays.

-You wanna try my eggnog?
-No.

I'm sorry.
Is it okay if go by yourself, okay?

Because Anna's cheating on me.

Ouch.

Who's the lucky guy?

Maybe it's not another guy.

Strap on our life jackets
and hit the Marina.

See?
That's why I've sworn off women.

How would you like that guy right now,
all heartbroken over a lady?

Bitches ain't nothing
but tricks and ho's.

You said it, bubele.

The system checks out
and everything's online.

Most on-board functions
are controllable...

...from anywhere on the boat.

Nice ship.
She reminds me of the Pacific Princess.

-I'm not familiar.
-Oh, really.

He's referring to Love Boat.

-Chuck, please.
-You got a head on board?

-I had a lot of eggnog.
-You should've left it at home.

Not every boat you
get on is a booze cruise.

Bathroom's not in there.
Nobody downstairs.

No, Jeff. Stop, Jeff, no.
-Whoa.

Jackpot.
-Please get out.

Get out. Go, go, go.

Watch the step.
-Watch the what? Oh.

-What's with all the cash? Easy, sister.
-I'm not your sister.

They're counting money raised for
Mr. Kirk's aid organization from a charity.

-Kirk, as in the captain?
-Lon Kirk.

-The man who owns this boat.
-Oh, right.

Yeah, Lon Kirk, he's a billionaire.
He owns a country, right?

Incoming.

Oh.

Ladies, I'm getting my sea legs.

-Hi.
-Jeff, Lester, I think we should go now.

Sir, you dropped this....

-They're fake.
-Whatever.

So is Cool Whip.

Ahoy-hoy.

The serial numbers that Chuck flashed on
are a strain of counterfeit currency...

...the treasury's been trying to crack.

But we should wait to debrief you
until Agent Walker arrives.

Yes.

Where is Agent Walker?

Uh, ma'am, Agent Walker's currently--

Ahem. Agent Walker
is currently suffering...

...from a spastic colon,
which acts up on her from time to time--

She has no history of that.

Perhaps we should reschedule
when Agent Walker is feeling better.

I'm fine. I'm sorry I'm late, carry on.

As we were saying, Lon Kirk now
devotes most of his time and money...

...to aid projects, mostly foreign.

We think he's the source.
-Not confirmed.

However, we have intel that
a major counterfeiter is in Los Angeles...

...trying to acquire
a new set of printing plates.

And how shall we proceed?

As far as Kirk is
concerned, very cautiously.

He's very well-connected.

He's hosting an event tonight
at the New Constellation Yacht Club.

Sarah and Chuck will go as guests.
Casey as staff.

One question. Will Chuck and Sarah
be going as a couple?

-Unless they have a problem.
-No problem.

No problem.
-Good luck, then.

Hey, hey, Sarah. Wait.

-What's up?
-Um....

Nothing.

Nothing, really just....

You know, good to see you.

Thought you'd be
halfway to Bryce by now.

Why would you think that?

I don't know, because he offers
a pretty exciting life, I guess.

Sipping mai tais in Jakarta,
or assassinating Afghani warlords...

...or whatever it is
you kids do for fun.

I'm here because I have a job to do.

Right.

Right. Of course, the job.

I better-- Uh, I better be going as well.
I gotta punch in.

-Sarah?
-Yeah?

Should we carpool
on our stay tonight?

Be at my place at 8.

For those of you who aren't aware...

...this Friday is our annual
Buy More Christmas--

Oop.

Holiday party.

Respect to our Hebrew friends,
and whatever else we have here.

So there's no confusion...

...I'll go over the ground rules.

Rule number one.

Jeff.

No spiking the eggnog.

-Can I bring my own?
-No.

Rule number two. Jeff, no holding
the mistletoe over the women...

...and copping a feel.
-Uh, sir.

Hopefully, if Jeff follows
rule number one, which I'm sure...

...he might do,
then rule number two won't apply.

Good point.
Okay, who's bringing eats?

Uh, I'll be making latkes.

What's that?

Um, it's a traditional Jewish pancake.

-They got tater in them?
-Yes.

They fried?

They are, sir.

-Good. Meeting adjourned.
-Ah.

We gotta find out
how to make latkes.

Hey.

There you are.
You missed the meeting.

Jeff has to stay sober,
and he can't grope women. I know.

Okay.

If you don't tell me what's up,
I'm going to tickle you until you pee.

No, please. I don't want it.

Cut it out. Stop it.

I know, okay? You weren't home
last night, Anna, you went out.

I was in the bushes in a stakeout
with my iPod and corned beef.

I know it's a little weird.
But I saw you get picked up.

I'm not an idiot, all right?

At least not when it comes to this.

I'm sorry, Morgan.

I did lie.

Oh, my....

I think I'm gonna be nauseous.

But I'm not seeing someone else.

I saw you getting
in a guy's German luxury sedan.

Bad enough you're cheating.
But with someone successful?

Morgan, my parents are in town.
That was my dad's car.

-I thought your parents live in Taiwan.
-They do, mostly.

They're in town with a bunch
of Taiwanese government...

...and muckety-mucks
for a charity thing in L.A.

I like to meet your parents.

If you're serious about this relationship,
you should want me to meet them too.

Okay.

Hey.
-Oh!

Would you stop sneaking up on me?

This is a retail store. Not Tora Bora.

Oh, Sarah's got you all up in a tizzy.

Flush out your headgear, new guy.

We know the Intersect
needs as much room as it can get.

Okay, look, nothing is going on, okay?

Better not be.
Need your A-game tonight. Stay sharp.

I think I need your help.
I think I made a horrible mistake.

-What did you swallow this time?
-No, no, it's worse, worse.

Uh, Anna's parents are in town, right?

So I tell her, "I'd like to meet them."
She goes, "Okay."

What was I thinking?
My own parents don't even like me.

-We're similar.
-Morgan, Morgan, relax, buddy.

Just be yourself.
That's what Anna likes, right?

So will her parents.

Yeah, you're right.

That's what I'll do--
-You insane?

You can't be yourself.

You have to be better than yourself
by, like, a factor of 10.

Or 11.

Gotta take it up a notch, gotta step it up.
Who should I be?

Last I check, there were over
6 billion people on the planet.

Pick anyone,
should be an improvement.

Lester, you shut up.
Morgan, you relax.

Relax.
-You're gonna be fine.

Be myself.

Rock 'n' roll.
I'm gonna make a fool of myself.

It's open.

Not a morning person, I see.

Well, it depends on the morning.
So we're clear on everything?

Eyes and ears on anything
that can trigger a flash.

-Our cover is we're a couple, you're--
-Charles Carmichael.

Yeah, I got it.

It should be pretty fun, right?

It's work.

It's okay. I got it.

Okay. Well, uh, ready to go to work?

If you're expecting me to hit the tables,
I'm gonna need a no-interest spy loan.

You'd be shocked what a government
super-computer pays.

CIA staked us. You have a hundred.

Oh, well, that's ample.

-Since when do you drink martinis?
-Oh, I don't, no.

But Carmichael loves them.

There he is. Let's go.

Ah, roulette, huh? My favorite game
aside from "Call of Duty."

Chips, please.

One hundred, sir. Good luck.

Don't lose it.

I don't believe we've met before.
I'm Lon Kirk.

I'm the host of this evening's event.

I know the people of Taiwan
are appreciative of your generosity.

Oh, well, cheers.

-The name's Charles Carmichael.
-Pleasure.

And your stunning companion.

Sarah Walker, pleasure.
-Indeed.

May I ask, Mr. Kirk--?

-Lon, please.
-Lon.

I was wondering how you came to focus
your charitable efforts on Taiwan.

Well, I started doing business there,
and I just fell in love with the people...

...their indefatigable spirit.

And I said to myself--

-Three on high, please.
-Yes.

I said to myself, "Lon, you can help."

That's wonderful.
-And I always bet on red.

Because it reminds me
of the pain and suffering.

How noble.

Any other bets?
-Mm-hm. Mm-hm.

I'm in. All of it.

Always bet on black.

Wesley Snipes, Passenger 57.
Not a great film, granted.

Are you sure you wanna risk it all?
Don't wanna reconsider?

-Doesn't seem prudent.
-Prudent? Ha-ha-ha.

I mean, here, I thought
we were gambling, right?

If I lose it, it goes to charity.
So here's to losing.

-Cheers.
-Bets are in, 100,000 on black.

A hundred thousand dollars?

Is that what you just said?

No, no, no, wait,
wait, I didn't realize....

It's a normal bet for me, $100,000.
So come on, black.

Black, black, black. Ha.

Come on, honey. Cheer for black.

Three red.

Do you do mulligans in roulette,
or any kind of a do-over?

Is there like a thing...?

Thank you. Thank you very much.

If you'll excuse me.

Did you really wink at him?

Did you really just lose $100,000?

Psst.

Kirk's talking to Rashan Chen. Taiwanese
attaché© to the premier. He's dirty.

They're using the charity as a front
to launder counterfeit money.

Something's wrong, I'm gonna go over.
Chuck, you stay at the table.

What...?

We'll work on a payment plan later.

Can we?

-She's being obvious, don't you think?
-Relax, she's doing her job.

So, uh, what did you
and Kirk talk about?

Uh, he invited me
to his yacht tomorrow afternoon.

Okay. What time should I be ready?

No. Just me.

Oh, just you, alone on his yacht.

Kind of disrespectful
to your boyfriend.

Bryce is not my boyfriend,
and even if he was...

...he would understand
this kind of work.

I meant Carmichael, actually.

But don't worry. Carmichael's
booked up tomorrow, anyway.

Very, very busy schedule,
so good luck and good night.

Hmm?

Nice car.

Not just any car.

It's a 1985 Crown Victoria.

She doesn't like it
when I talk about her age.

I'm not really a car guy,
so I don't really....

Pretty shiny.

Oh, yeah, she's shiny.

Four-point-six V8 engine.

Hydro-glide transmission.

Reupholstered
the prisoner-containment area.

Even installed a state-of-the-art GPS
tracking system in the license plate.

Can locate this baby anywhere
in the world in less than a minute.

That's great.
That's really great, Casey.

Could buy 10 more with the money
you pissed away on one spin last night.

I knew you weren't gonna let that go.
How did I know that?

So, what exactly is Sarah's mission
on that guy's boat today?

Get close to Lon Kirk
by any means necessary.

Wait.

You're saying
she's gonna go down there, and flirt...

...with Lon Kirk, alone?

I mean, do you have an idea
of what kind of message that gives?

I hear Agent Walker
can be quite the giver.

How's it going?

Okay, sweet deal.

Do me a favor
and keep it up front. Oh.

So, Morgan, you work at Buy More?

Yes, sir, that's correct.

And Anna will tell you that I got
the old nose to the grindstone.

Not literally, because that would hurt.

And is that where you see yourself
in, say, five years?

That's a tough question.

I could tell you where I don't
wanna see myself in five years.

Prison or under house arrest.

Doing anything that involves
a lot of chopping, deep knee bends.

-No nudity.
-Waiter, cocktail.

Just generally try to keep
my clothes on, you know, it's....

Are you insane?

You can't be yourself.

You have to be better than yourself.

Are you guys having lobster?
Could you bring back a doggy bag?

Take it up, take it up.
Gotta be better.

Where am I from? Wow.

Where are any of us really from?

I myself hail from many fathers.

Nietzsche, Sartre, Jarrell.

He's-- Encino. He's from Encino.

There I was. There I was.

There I was in the Congo.

When you guys eat Chinese food,
do you get hungry an hour later too?

There she goes.

You don't mind, do you, babe?

Know who else famously smoked a pipe?
Boyhood hero of mine.

Yeah, yeah.
Quite the yachtsman himself.

One Popeye the sailorman.

Anyone, huh? Boop-boop.

Will you guys excuse me
for one second?

-Hey, Morgan.
-Oh, hey, dude.

We got a possible situation here.

I'm lunching with Anna's
parents at some yacht club in Marina.

Okay. I see someone who resembles
the future Mrs. Chuck Bartowski.

Right now, she's getting lotioned up...

...by some creepy Richard Branson-meets-
Willem Dafoe-looking dude, right?

And he is all over her, man.

I mean, he is really greasing her
and working up this lather, it's just....

Quite a scene over here, and, um....

I gotta go. Lobsters here.

Hey, hey, hey.
Don't shoot, put the gun down.

-You can have the jelly-filled.
-What are you doing here?

I thought you might be hungry.
Friend-to-friend kind of a thing.

-Where's Sarah?
-Oh, that's it.

Think your girlfriend's stepping out.
Agent Walker's fine doing her job.

See?

Plus, we have a whole team here...

...to back her up.

Okay?

So you can beat it, Bartowski.

Oh, my God. They're going down.

Chuck, what is it?

They're loading counterfeit plates
onto that boat.

Hidden in crates
marked as aid medicines.

What?

Flashed on a crate
they brought onboard.

That's why Kirk
brought Sarah below deck.

This guy's important,
we can't be wrong. You sure?

I just flashed. I'm sure, okay?

This is Casey.

We're going in. Go.

I know we just met,
but I feel so close to you.

Federal agents. Nobody move.

Get down.

Excuse me one moment.

Okay, don't move.

Hey, Hey.
-Don't move.

-Who are you people?
-NSA.

-Stay there, let us do our job.
-Job?

-Do you have any idea who I am?
-Open it.

That crate is a bonded humanitarian
shipment certified by the United Nations.

-It's illegal for you to open it.
-I can make calls.

-Hope you don't mind waiting.
-Oh, I do, so we won't.

Medical supplies,
for the earthquake victims of Taiwan.

I wanted to deliver it myself.
We leave tomorrow.

Now, if I could get your names
and agency affiliations...

...I wanna make sure everybody
is accounted for when I speak...

...to your bosses' bosses
later this evening.

-Ellie or Awesome home?
-No.

-They're at work, and hello to you too.
-What the hell happened today?

I don't know, I don't get it.

-I had a flash.
-When I went below deck with Kirk.

-Convenient timing.
-What are you talking about?

When you thought I was getting intimate
with Kirk, you decided to have a flash.

What exactly are you implying?
That I'm a flash faker?

We need to discuss the fact that you
let your emotions get in the way today.

My emotions?

Things have been
a little off since the incident, Chuck.

Really? And what incident
are you referring to, Agent Walker?

Could it be
when you planted a kiss on me...

...right before a bomb
was supposed to go off, ending our lives?

That same kiss right before Bryce
came back from the dead? That kiss--?

Stop saying kiss.
What's done is done.

Can we just not talk about it, please?

Okay, fine.
Just answer me one little thing.

Did you kiss me
because we were gonna die...

...and mine were the most convenient
lips around, or was it actually about me?

What happened was a mistake.

One I will not make again.

Well, well, well.

-Looking good, Morgan.
-Well, feeling good, Charles.

And how was meeting
Anna's parents?

Uh, it was fine.
You know, I think it went okay.

Ish.

Let's just say he wasn't the Morgan
we've all come to know and love.

-Captain Stubing.
-Morning, Michael.

I was thinking about focusing
on the starboard side of the store.

If you don't change
into regulation clothing now...

...I'm gonna kick
the starboard side of your ass.

Why do people hate the rich?

Speaking of starboard,
Anna's parents invited us...

...or at least Anna, on a cruise with some
of their big shot Taiwanese friends.

You and Sarah should join us. Supposed
to be some bigwig diplomats there.

You and Sarah should be
hanging out with diplomats, Chuck.

Oh. Or just you. Right.
I'm sorry, dude.

-Find out if that was Sarah yesterday?
-Yeah, yeah.

You know, it wasn't her.

Must have been
some other busty Iong-legged blond.

-They're a dime a dozen around here.
-Figured it wasn't her, you know.

To be honest with you,
I wasn't looking at her face.

Well, boat later, huh?

You, me.
Shrimp cocktails supposed to be served.

Thanks, buddy. But I think
I'm gonna stay landlocked tonight.

Oh, well, suit yourself. Ahoy-hoy.

Which part of
"Handle Lon Kirk with caution"...

...wasn't clear,
Agents Walker and Casey?

Chuck flashed, general.

Our decision to raid was based
on the information from the Intersect.

Except Chuck was wrong.

We think Kirk must have
managed to hide the plates somehow.

Where?

-We don't know.
-So you moved in, anyway.

Is there something that might've caused
Chuck to think those were on Kirk's?

Anything that might have
caused his flash?

Not that we're aware of.

I don't want the two of you near Kirk
from now on.

Both of us?
But he doesn't suspect me.

We don't know that,
and we can't risk it.

So until further notice,
consider yourselves benched.

That was a bang-up job, Walker.

Gonna give you one last chance
to come clean.

Did you or did you not
compromise yourself in the Intersect?

Do you ever
just wanna have a normal life?

Have a family?

Children?

The choice we made to protect
something bigger than ourselves...

...is the right choice.

Hard as that is for you
to remember sometimes.

I'll talk to Chuck.

And if I can't fix this,
then I'm gonna ask for a reassignment.

Oh.

Ah, ha. Gilligan.

Hey there, little buddy.

The plates are on Rashan's boat.

Oh.

This baby's got it all.
Got four main burners--

Hey, we need to talk.

Later. I'm about to move
a Beast Master.

No. Now.

Fine. Be right back.
This better be good.

Morgan sent me a JPEG from
the Taiwanese attaché’s yacht, okay?

I uploaded it and used
an X-TEL software device...

...to break down
the data into readable bytes.

English, Bartowski.

I blew up the photo.

The plates are on Rashan's boat
with Anna and Morgan.

These are the same crates as yesterday.
Ones that got us benched.

Did you just hear what I said?
Morgan and Anna are on--

Look, I'm right about this.
The Intersect is right about this.

Orders are orders.

Your wiener, sir.

-Excuse me, I need to talk to you.
-Not now.

These are the same crates
I flashed on yesterday.

Here, on a boat
with the Taiwanese attaché©.

The one arguing with Kirk.
He's getting away with the plates.

-Kirk put the plates on Rashan's boat?
-Yes.

I know your orders are to stay away,
but believe me.

The plates are on that boat
with Morgan and Anna.

I wouldn't be here right now
if I wasn't a hundred percent sure.

-What are you...?
-Let's go.

Chuck, Sarah.

Casey, what are you doing here?
-Someone needs to protect the Intersect.

Very thoughtful. Thank you, I guess.

Plus, I didn't wanna
miss any gunplay. Come on.

Look, there he is.

There's a GPS missile tracking device
on the ship. They'll blow it up.

Kirk's got his money.
He'll bury the evidence.

I'm king of the world.

King of the world.

I'm king of the world.

They're loading something.

That's it. That's the missile launcher.

Gonna follow him and use it to take out
the Taiwanese boat.

The one with Morgan on it,
little buddy?

-Create a diversion.
-I'll get the guards.

-I know, stay in the car.
-Not this time.

We've got a GPS tracker on the ship.

The rocket guides itself.

-Are the coordinates set?
-Yes, sir.

-I just gotta pull the trigger.
-No, when the time comes, I'll pull.

-I never liked Rashan anyway.
-Sir, we've got a situation.

Lon.

Lon.

-Hi.
-It's okay, it's okay.

Lon, I'm so sorry,
but I had to talk to you.

It's all right. That's great,
but we're about to push off.

I know, I know. Uh....

God, this is embarrassing.

But it's just since I was here last...

...I haven't been able
to stop thinking about you.

And I was just wondering
if maybe we could talk or....

Ha, ha. Um.... Uh....

Okay. Yeah, okay,
we have a couple minutes.

Well, well, well.

I see how it is, Sarah.

How could you do this
after everything that I've done for you?

After all that I've given to you,
the house...

...the house in the Hamptons, huh?

Or what about the summers
in South Africa, or the winters in Gastot?

You don't own me, Charles.
Lon knows how I really feel.

Do you love him?

Know what?
I don't have time for this.

Oh, yes, you do.

Yeah, I know
what you're up to, buddy.

-I know the truth.
-Go home.

-Tell me--
-It is time for you to go.

What was that?

He's-- He's-- Sarah.

He went in the room--
Guys, guys, guys!

Get out of the way.

Put the rocket launcher down.

Oh.

What...?

Hey, hey, hey. Look, look, look.

The rocket is guided by GPS software.
All software can be reset.

Hurry up.

Great. Bye.

Look at the size.
These things are the size of baby cats.

Gonna be sick if you don't stop.

Yeah, but look at-- Mr. Wu,
have you seen something so huge?

-Please stop that.
-This is....

Oh, Anna, look, look, look. Fireworks.

That's it.

Ooh.

-You did it, Chuck.
-Ha-ha-ha.

I can't believe that worked.

-Where's the rocket heading now?
-I don't know, I reset it.

Sure reset
doesn't mean "return to sender"?

Oh, man. Oh, man.

-Another target.
-Away from us.

I need another target first,
with GPS coordinates. I don't know.

Casey, what about your car?

-No.
-We're running out of time.

Just tell me the GPS coordinates.

Tell him, Casey.
-Tell me, Casey.

Seven-one-four-seven-seven.

Ugh.

I'm really sorry, buddy. Oh!

I hate this assignment.

I said I was sorry, right?

Hey, buddy.
-Hey, dude.

How did it go with Anna's family
on the yacht?

Fine, until I got seasick and barfed.

Was Anna freaked out?

She rubbed my back mid-puke,
and then brought me a warm cloth...

...to clean the shrimp blobs
out of my beard.

-Hmm.
-She's an amazing woman, dude.

And I am a lucky guy.

Is there a way you can say that
to her instead of me?

Yeah. I guess I could, but that
would leave me completely vulnerable.

Like a sweet puppy laying on his back,
waiting for his belly to be scratched.

Privates just kind of dangling
out there for everyone to see.

But I can certainly
give it a shot, you know?

Doors closed. Time to get polluted.

Okay, people.

The official Buy More Christmas--

Hey, now.

Holiday party is about to commence.

As a reminder,
I'll accept all gifts, cash and checks...

...in my office or under the tree.

Keep it clean
and be prepared to get down.

I'm gonna be right back. Ahem.

Hey, listen.
I'm really sorry about the whole--

-Killing my car thing?
-Yeah, that.

Again, I'm sorry.

She was my dream car.

Crown Victoria was your dream car?

And why wouldn't it be?
Really beautiful lines, I've always found--

I feel terrible about that, okay?

But it is the holidays, right?
Which is a time for forgiveness.

-Anything I can do to make it up to you?
-Sure.

-You can buy me a new car.
-Ha. Huh.

You're totally serious.

That's my jam.

-I believe that makes me a winner.
-I thought shin beat nun.

And have you been
bar mitzvahed, Jeffrey?

No.
Ah. I didn't think so.

-Right.
-Anna, can I talk to you?

Uh, I'm sorry that I was a jerk
in front of your parents.

I pretended to be something I'm not,
because I thought....

I thought
you were embarrassed of me.

Morgan, I didn't want you
to meet my parents...

...because I'm embarrassed
of who I am in front of them.

What do you mean?

Pretending to be their obedient little girl,
dressing a certain way, not being myself.

-I didn't want you to see me like that.
-I did miss your pretty makeup.

And your inappropriately short skirts.

Not everything's changed, Morgan.

-Think the break-room door's locked?
-Let's find out.

Merry Christmas to all.
And to all, a good night.

-Hi.
-Hey.

I'm glad you....

I'm glad you came.

I got you something.

Ta-da.

New alarm clock. Merry Christmas.

-You shouldn't have.
-Ah, come on.

They're on sale in home electronics...

...which reminds me, I should scan that
before you leave the store with it.

Look, it's also kind
of a thank you for believing me...

...when you had good reason not to.

Well, it's my job, you know?
It's what I do.

It's the one thing I'm good at.

Really?

Because I'm pretty sure
you're good at a lot of things.

Well, as you can see from everything
that happened with Bryce...

...I'm not so good at relationships.

I guess that makes two of us.

And then that makes me good
at pretty much nothing, I suppose.

Chuck, you're good at your job too,
and not just here fixing computers.

The one where you risk
your life to save others...

...the one that you didn't ask for
but were supposed to have.

Friends?

Yeah, friends.

Mistletoe.

You'll thank me later, dude.

How about we just dance?

-Sure.
-Lame.

Casey.
-Major.

I'm calling to inform you
that the beta version...

...of the Intersect computer
was successful.

This means the new Intersect
should be up and running soon.

Once the new computer is online,
it will be time to take care of Bartowski.

Roger that.

I hope you have not grown
too fond of the subject.

I would hate for you
to be compromised.

I understand my orders, general.

Oh, and John?
-Yeah?

Happy holidays.