Charlie's Angels (1976–1981): Season 1, Episode 17 - The Vegas Connection - full transcript

The Angels investigate Cass Harper, who hires girls for a Las Vegas nightclub chorus line as a front for a prostitution ring, & he lures them by saying his clients are extremely wealthy & may be looking for marriage.

Once upon a time,

there were three little girls
who went to the police academy.

And they were each assigned
very hazardous duties.

But I took them away
from all that,

and now they work for me.
My name is Charlie.

Mr. Mallin,
your office safe

has just been opened
and some money taken.

Have you
called the police?

I didn't think
you'd want me to.

It was your wife,
Mr. Mallin.

CHARLIE: What about
Tina Mallin's background?

She did some work
as a bit actress.

She worked a lot
when she was available,

but she hasn't worked since
she's been married to Mallin.

I checked her
with the police departments.

No arrests. Not even
any outstanding traffic tickets.

What was the last you heard
from Sabrina?

She followed Mrs. Mallin
to a beauty shop,

then to a department store.

Mrs. Mallin picked out
a fur coat, signed for it,

and took it with her
when she left.

Didn't even leave it to be
monogrammed on the lining.


Hold on one, Charlie.


Mrs. Mallin just went
into the Poker Palace,

and on her way here
she took her new fur coat

to a pawn shop
on Calvin Avenue-- 862 West.

She hocked it.

What did the pawnbroker say?

That Mrs. Mallin's a regular--

like once a month
for the last three months.

She comes in here
with a brand-new mink

or a diamond ring.

Once she even came in
with a marquise emerald.

She goes in
once a month?

Second Tuesday of the month,
like clockwork.

Look, that's all I got for now.

I'm going to go in
and watch her play cards.

We'll come watch
with you, Bree.

That's a good idea.

We watch for cheats
from up here.

The customers
that know about it

really appreciate
the protection.

Does she always play
with the same three people?

Ever since they started
to come in here

about five or six months ago.

Same players, same table.
Second Tuesday of the month.

Have any idea how much
money's in that game?

That's none of our business.
We just rent them the tables.

So much a half-hour.

But it looks rich to me.

It does, huh?

Here comes my
ground-level recon team.

Excuse me.

I saw the empty chair.
Mind if I sit in?

Sorry, pretty.
That one's for a friend.

I can be a friend.

Two cards, please.

Yeah, but this one has
a mustache and drives a truck.

Struck out.

Maybe I'm not the world's
best card player,

but that lady--
Look at her.

Tell me if the way she's
playing makes sense to you.

Did you see
what she just did?

She just raised
and then she folded

with three kings
in a five-card draw game.

She's bananas.

I can't believe it.

Well, I watched her through
a one-way glass ceiling.

I saw her cards.

She's a good player.

She's so much better than I am

that she won't even play
a hand of gin with me.

She remembers all the cards.
She beats me every time.

Does that sound
like someone who raises

and then
tosses in three kings?

No, it doesn't,
but that's what she did.

All right. Then find out
why she's gambling like this.

Well, it might help,
Mr. Mallin, if you could

give us some personal details
of your relationship.


What can I tell you?
I love her.

I think she loves me.

I know she loves me.

She wouldn't do
anything to hurt me.

But she is.

Yes, she is.

So, please...

Please find out why.

CHARLIWhat have we got
on the other poker players

Mrs. Mallin was playing with?

I checked out the woman.
Her name is Naddy Samuels.

She's married
to Hugh Samuels.

Now, he's another player
at the table.

The third player
is Sidney Carver,

a truck driver,
L.A. to New York run.

What about the Samuels couple?

Well, they own
a small boutique in Westwood,

and he also works as a waiter

in a French restaurant
in Santa Monica.

Mrs. Mallin's losses,

their financial situation
makes no sense at all.

The day after each game,

they deposit
only $1,000 to their account.

Never more, never less.

What about Carver,
the truck driver?

He deposits a thousand, too.

What do you suppose happens
to the rest of the money?

We don't know.

We have learned one thing
that could tie Mrs. Mallin

to Samuels
and the truck driver.

Mrs. Mallin was a dancer
in the chorus line at--

Mr. and Mrs. Samuels worked
as a waiter and a waitress at--

Sidney Carver makes weekly
deliveries on Wednesdays to--

The Versailles Hotel
in Las Vegas.

Which is the only person,
place, or thing

that they all four
have in common.

And if we were right
in the beginning

in thinking
this was blackmail,

the Versailles could be
where it all started.

If the blackmailer isn't
one of the poker players

but somebody
still at the Versailles,

that explains what happens

to the rest of the money
Mrs. Mallin loses.

Sid takes it to Vegas
on his run and drops it off.

Then you think
the poker game

is the way Mrs. Mallin pays
her blackmail installments?

Well, it's the only way
her losing in those games

makes any sense, Charlie.

It also explains
the Samuels and Sid

only getting $1,000
of their winnings

as a cut as collectors.

All right. That's the trail
we have to follow.

You'll all have to go
up to Vegas.

Only problem is,
we don't have any real lead

once we get there.

Charlie, we've got
to talk to Mrs. Mallin.

Without that, we could spend
six months in Vegas

and come back
with nothing but a suntan.

That's more than a lot
of people come back with.

I'll call Mallin and tell him.

And since we represent
the insurance company

that covers your husband,
his office, and his corporation,

the investigation
of the robbery fell to us.

This is ridiculous.

Mrs. Mallin,
your fingerprints were found

on the inside
of your husband's safe.

Why would I rob
my own husband?

That's the question
that we're here

to get the answer for,
Mrs. Mallin. Why did you?

We think
you're being blackmailed.

That's even more absurd,
Mr. Bosley.

Mrs. Mallin, we know about
the monthly poker games

at table nine
at the Poker Palace.

Poker's legal in that county.

Yes, it is.

But good players
don't usually lose.

And you're a good card player.

Anyone could have a streak
of bad luck. I did.

Mrs. Mallin,
your husband's account

is worth more to us

than the money
you've taken. So far.

But not with a black cloud
hanging over you.

Unless you let us help you,
we'll have no choice

but to inform
your husband, his company,

and prosecute you
for the $22,000 loss.

You're blackmailing me, too!


sent pictures of me
in a hotel room

taken five years ago
in Las Vegas,

and they told me
to lose $30,000 a month

every month
at those poker games.

I don't know who--

Honestly, I don't know
who's doing this to me!

All right. Okay.
Look, uh...

Mrs. Mallin,
you know you'll have

to tell us about those pictures.

I was in a room...

with a man...

and the lights were out.

I don't know how anybody
could've taken those pictures.

Look, I'm not
copping out, okay?

I did what I did.

It's taken me months
with a psychiatrist

to be able to say that.

I did what I did,
but I was no tramp.

I wasn't then,
and I'm not now.

I was alone,
I was broke.

I was up for a job in the chorus
at the Versailles Hotel.

The next opening was mine,
but there was no opening.

Every day passing is time.

Time costs money.

And mine just ran out.

Anyway, a guy introduced me
to a high roller

who was looking for company
for the evening.

I went.

And the high roller made me
an offer that I couldn't refuse.

No, scratch that.

I could have refused,
but I was too dumb to refuse.

When the sun came up
the next morning...

I had $500 in my purse...

and feeling so dirty,
I couldn't wash it off.

I took the next flight out.

Mrs. Mallin, do you remember
the name of the man

who introduced you
to the high roller?

Cass Harper.

He runs the showroom
at the Versailles Hotel.

I thought he was
doing me a favor.

Big favor.

I remember
every rotten detail.

Even the room number.


Room 862.
Cass Harper, huh?

Her parents are dead,
and nobody else

really much cares
whether she's alive or dead.

Money's almost gone.

I don't know.
In her place,

maybe I could
almost con myself into it.

I don't know.
I think I could.

Well, let's hope none of us
ever gets put in a position

where we'd have
to find out what we'd do.

Where is Kelly
and that other rental car?

She is at the Versailles

for the chorus line.

Hope she has better luck
with Cass Harper

than Mrs. Mallin did.


Hey, baby, I got to tell you,
you are a winner.

You move like sheer silk
in a summer breeze.

You're out of sight. Really.
Do you know that?

Do I have the job,
Mr. Harper?

No, it's Cass, sweetheart.

I swear, if there was one,
you'd have it.

You see, right now--
Wait a minute.

There's a chick, Sheila--

Right, she's supposed
to be getting married soon.

I tell you what, let me have
a little talk with her,

see if she's
set a date yet.

She goes, you're in.
Is that fair?

Can't ask for much more
than that, can I?

Baby, this town is full
of beautiful broads

who'd give an arm and a leg
to have as much.

Hey, they got looks,

but they got
nowhere near your talent.

Now, you keep in touch.

It's just a matter
of time, you know?

In the meanwhile,
what I want you to do

is come down and see the show,
check out the routines.

You feel free
to just come backstage

and watch any time
you want. Okay?


I'll see you later.

Excuse me, but...

you don't look dumb enough
to believe that jive

Cass was laying on you.

You mean he was lying to me?

There isn't a job
that's opening up?

Let's look at it this way.

If there was,
and he offered it to you,

I'd break your leg
before you could take it.

Look, if you think I have
any interest in Mr. Harper--

Just go crawl back
into the woodwork, sweetums.

There's nothing for you here.
Nothing at all.

Bosley, don't you think you put

a little too much garlic
in there?

No advice, please.
When I cook, I do it alone.

You eat that much garlic,
you'll do everything alone.

We'll all do
everything alone.

Do you really think
I put in too much?


Hey, Jill, do you think
if we lobbied in Washington,

we could get garlic declared
an endangered species?

Boy, I could find my way here
from downtown

with my eyes closed.

Nobody has to eat this,
you know.


Now, now,
if Bosley went out hunting

and shot this whole garlic
for our dinner,

we mustn't tease him.

Sorry, Boz.

Did you get to meet
Cass Harper, Kelly?

I met him.
There was no way to avoid him.

He slithered in,

gave me the "sugar baby,
honey pie" routine,

told me I had real talent,

that there wasn't
a job right now

but that the first one
that opened up would be mine.

He also said
to be sure and come back.


We've been talking about
this blackmail setup,

and it doesn't make sense

that a blackmailer would want
pictures of the chorus girls.

They don't make any money.

They'd want pictures
of the men they were with.

He just happened to luck out

when Tina Mallin
married a man with money.

Jill, don't be
such a female chauvinist.

Why does a blackmailer
have to be a man?

Bet it is.

Oh, so do I.

But on principle,
I resent the sexist presumption.

Point well taken, Bosley.
We apologize.


Okay, okay, come on.

It doesn't seem likely
that the hotel management

would go along with having
their customers blackmailed.

I mean,
it's bad for business.

Makes sense.

Yeah, so,
what's our next move?

Enter Will Thurman,
Texas high roller.

11, a winner.


My name is Will Thurman.

That's my cashier's check
for 50,000,

and this is my identification
to prove I am who I say I am.

I'd like $1,000
in chips, please,

and then bank the rest
in case I should need it later.

Thank you.

Well, look who decided
not to do what she was told.

Look, I need this job.

Poor baby.

I'll see you later.

Hi, baby.
Glad you could make it.

How do you
like the show so far?

It's fantastic.
I think I could learn

all the routines
in a couple of days.

Sure you can.
I stage it myself.

A little rehearsal,
you'll be fantastic.

Mr. Harper--

Hiya, baby.

Meet Kelly.
Kelly, this is Elsbeth.

Mr. Harper,
I have to talk to you.

Sure. Am I ever
too busy for you?

Mr. Harper, look.

I am running out of money,
and you did promise me a place--

And I will.
Just trust me, will you, babe?

I got to split.
I'll catch you later.

Can we talk, Elsbeth?

Yeah, sure. What about?

Well, it's kind of important,
so now's fine.

But not here, okay?
Come on.


Cass is going to get a shock

if he ever tries
to put me on the street.

Wow, I only know you two
for 10 minutes,

and I've gone from thinking
you're a couple of weirdos

to telling you
my whole life story.

Guess I'm kind of
at the end of my rope.

I guess I really just need
someone to talk to.

We're good listeners.



I have got $34 in the bank,

$11 in my wallet,
and my rent's due Friday.


I got married when I was 18.

It was very romantic.

We ran away together.

When I was 19,

he put me in a little
kind of short skirt

and sent me
out to the street.

Then for my
20th birthday,

he sent me back
onto the street

with a fat lip...

and a black eye...

and told me
not to come back

with anything less
than 100 bucks.

Well, he's still waiting.

Straightened myself up,

took some singing lessons,

here I am.

Well, sounds like you've
gotten yourself together.

Cass'll find out
how together I am

if he ever tries
to put me on the street.

You know,

you really are
the same person,

whether you sell yourself
for five bucks or a thousand.

No one...

is ever going to buy
or sell me anymore.


Don't worry.
It'll be fine.

Man, I think
we got trouble.

Really? What kind?

There's a broad in here
at one of the blackjack tables.

She tried to crash our game
at the Poker Palace.

So? What makes her trouble?

She's there saying she wants
to play in our game,

then she shows up here.
That's not trouble?

Come on,
don't get paranoid, Sid.

She's probably just a player.
It's a coincidence.

Not that she's here,
but that you'd remember her.

You don't forget
that kind of broad.

Why don't you
just buy her a drink

and get acquainted?

She's probably
just crazy for you

and followed you here.

I'm telling you, Cass,
bad vibes, man.

Then why don't you
just take the broad

out in the desert
and ice her, Sid?

Maybe I should,
just to be sure.


By dog, Fred, is that you?
Fred Hammond from Beaumont?

What are you doing
here in Las Vegas?

You got
the wrong guy, buddy.

I get it. You don't want nobody
knowing where you are.

I'll tell you, old hound dog,
who am I going to tell?

I ain't seen you
in the last ten years!

I'm not your old buddy.
You got the wrong guy, okay?

Oh, now, come on.

I'll tell you what I'll do.
I'll buy you a drink.

Then tell me why you don't
want to say who you are.

I'm not Fred.

I'm Sid Carver
from Los Angeles, all right?

Okay, then, I'm sorry,

but that's no reason to get
all het up about it.

I'll tell you what
I'm willing to do.

I'll buy you a drink
no matter who you are.

No, thanks.

Okay. Taxi!

Thanks, Fred!

I know Sid Carver saw me
when I tried

to sit in on the card game
at the Poker Palace.

And you're not sure
if he saw you two.

He might've.

I don't think so.

Well, it could've
been nothing.

He might not
have recognized Jill

and was just trying
to pick her up.

That has happened before.

He never spoke to me
in the casino.

In fact, I wasn't even
aware he was there.

All right, then, on the chance
that he is suspicious of you

and he is
at the casino tomorrow,

we'll rework the plan

so as you keep him away
from the rest of us.

I wish I knew what
you were all talking about.

I'll explain it to you
when I drive you home.

Which should be now,
as I am very tired.

It has been a long day.

Listen, while I'm gone,

you three can check out
the electronic equipment.


Oh, sure.


Well, are we three ready

to check out
the electronic equipment?

I think Bosley was laying

a little macho action
on Elsbeth.

Think he's
interested in her?

Sure wouldn't hurt.

Let's see if we can find
that electronic equipment.

I wouldn't know
what it looks like!

You see, our problem is

we don't know
what approach Cass uses

to persuade a girl
to play it cozy with a client.

And then you'd be
the client in this case.

And then I would
ask for a girl

fitting Kelly's description.


And I'll
convince Cass, then,

that Kelly'd go along
with all this.


And I get a ticket to L.A.
and some walk-around money.

That's really a lot to earn
for doing nothing much.

Listen, your being there
to give your okay to Kelly,

that's already avoided us

having to spend a couple
of weeks on her buildup.

I mean, on a pro rata basis,
we're getting away cheap.

Well, I don't really agree,
but I'm not about to argue.

And with a couple of breaks,
your part in this

should be over tomorrow night
at the same time.

With a couple of breaks, honey,

I could be
a big star on Broadway.

I'm sorry.

I didn't mean
to be a wiseacre.

Here you are being so nice,

and I'm coming off
flip and tough.

I guess that's
really what I am.

Well, the front
you put up is,

but inside I don't think
you're so tough.

I'm sorry. I didn't mean
to be personal.

What do I know?

It's all right.
I don't mind.

Well, I'll see you


Uh, could you do me a favor?

Sure, if I can.

Could you kiss me good night?

I mean, no one's ever kissed me
good night at my front door,

and I've always kind of--
I wondered what it was like.

You know, the way
I keep signing my name,

I'm beginning to feel sorry
for them movie stars

signing autographs
all the time!

Well, there we go, Jackson.
Let her rip.

And what do you say I win
a hand or two this time, huh?

I'd like to see you
win them all, Mr. Thurman.

Thank you, Jackson.

You know, meantime, could you
fetch the little waitress?

I'm getting ready
for a little drinking.

Cocktails, BJ Three, please.

Oh, oh!

Old Will's luck is starting
to change. Hot dog!

Tell you what we're
going to do, Jackson.

We're just going to double up
and let her ride.

Well, Mr. Thurman.

I'm Cass Harper with the hotel.
How do you do?

This is Janine.
Anything we can do for you?

Well, howdy, Janine.

Well, maybe just a little
sipping whiskey

on some shaved ice,
thank you.

You got that?

So, how's it going?

Oh, it's getting better
all the time.

Good. The house'd like
to invite you and your lady

to take in
the dinner show on us.

That is, if you have
no other plans.

Oh, I've got no plans,
but I got no lady.

Well, I know a young lady--
A very nice young lady--

who would be
more than happy

to share dinner with you,
if you'd like me to arrange it.

Well, any man that would
say no to a free meal

and a lady companion
is a fool.

And my mama
didn't raise up no fools.

Then I'll arrange it.

When you're ready to go in,

just give the ma?tre d'
your name,

and your table
will be arranged.

I didn't realize
I'd lost enough

to get the A-1 treatment,
old buddy!

I'm not sure whether
you did or you didn't,

but you might,
and if you do,

the house would
like you to do it here

rather than someplace else.

Their mamas didn't
raise up no fools either.

I like that.
Bless you for an honest man.

By the way, that young lady,
she wouldn't be

about so high and have
long dark hair, would she?

If she doesn't, she will
by the time you see her.

Oh, ho ho!

Good luck.

Thank you, Mr. Cass.

He's a nice man.

Thank you, Janine.

Shaved ice and everything.

I think Cass is here

to find Bosley's
lady for the evening.

You just got aced out!

Avril? She does
a little moonlighting?

I've heard some rumors.

Oh, no.
I got to do something.

I don't think
Bosley's up to that.

You know, I've been
thinking over what you said,

and I've decided

that you're the one
who should pack it in, not me.

Get lost, sweetums.

You're telling me to get lost?

I think
you heard me correctly.

Get away from me.

Come on, now.
What do you use for brains?

You just lost 500,
maybe 1,000. Stupid.

I can go change.

The john's
just going to stand around

and play a little solitaire
while he waits?

Go home.

I could use 500 or 1,000,
Mr. Harper,

and I'm not stupid.

You're a pro?

No, just a gifted amateur
who's short of cash.

If the bidding's open,
I want in.

You're not
what the john wants, Elsbeth.

But I am, or am I wrong?

No, you're what he wants.

New shooter coming out.

How you doing?

Good. I thought I was
going to have company.

She's on her way.
If it turns out you two

want to go someplace
and have a private chat--

Speak of the lady,

and like magic
here she is. Kelly!

Kelly, I'd like you
to meet Will.

Well, howdy, Kelly.

You two kids have
a good time, you hear?

Thank you, Mr. Harper.

Could I talk to you for just
a second, Kelly, honey?


Just a little sweet talk,

No problems?

None I couldn't handle.

Sabrina, it's Bosley.

Cass just gave me
the key to room 862.

That's the same number
that our client gave us,

so it's gotta be rigged.

We're on our way
up there now.

Sid still with you, Jill?

Oh, yeah.

Any way you can
put him on ice for a while?

He could pop up
and mess things up.

Sure. I think so.

Drop the gun.

Drop it.

Drop it.

Kick it back to me.

Okay, now reach in
and lean on the horn.


I'm so glad you're here.
I've never been this upset.

This man was following me
in the casino.

It's not even my car..

It's my roommate's car. I can't
believe it happened to me.

Here, take this thing.
I don't know what to do.

Nothing like this has ever
happened to me before.

I'm going to go up to my room.

I'll go to the police station

You're sweet to understand.
He wrecked my roommate's car.

What am I going
to tell my roommate?

Good night, Sid.

Oh, yes. Cozy.


Hello, good-looking.

Well, now, this is a real
yahoo room, ain't it?

What it ain't got,
you do, right?

Well, we aim to please, honey.

Ma'am, do you know where I am?
I am betwixt and between.

I mean, here we are,

and I got
this itch to gamble.

I mean, good feelings like

I couldn't roll
anything but sevens.

Well, first things first.
Let's go.

Ha ha!

Jill, this one.

Here, help me with this.

This one.

Now we know how the pictures
are taken and who takes them.

Or at least
what he looks like.

I've seen him in the casino.
I think he works for the hotel.

Well, he uses infrared film.

That's an infrared light, right?


So he can get a shot

whether the light is
on or off in that room.

And there's no doubt
Cass Harper's behind it.

He's our blackmailer.

Let's get out of here.

No, no, not all
your books, Mr. Sharfe.

Just your showroom books.

You see, I'm new with the state
auditing department,

and they only allow
non-tenured accountants

to check limited records.

You want the showroom books?
You get the showroom books.

You want them brought here,
or you want to go to them?

Well, whatever would be
most convenient for you.

Yeah, Max?

This is my
executive assistant Freddy.

How do you do?

Freddy, take this lady
from the tax department

to see Cass.

She's here to see
the showroom books.

And, Freddy, no dancing.
Just show her the books.

Thank you very much,
Mr. Sharfe.

My pleasure.

Now, anything you want,
Freddy'll get it for you.

Food, coffee--
Anything she wants, Freddy.

Just the books.
That's all.

This isn't a bribe.
I just don't want a lady

to starve to death
on my premises, that's all.

Thanks again.

Know what
the frustrating thing is?


We have enough evidence
against Cass Harper

to have him arrested
for pandering,

and he's still
walking the streets.

If we called the police,
we'd have cleaner streets

but we wouldn't have
the blackmail evidence,

and that's what
we came here for.

You know, there's more justice
in what he's going get

than any three-month sentence
he'd get for pandering.

Yes, there is, isn't there?

You back so soon?

Well, it didn't take long
to find out what I found.

You found
something illegal?

Well, yes and no.
See, theft is illegal.

It's just not what I was
sent here to look for.

I mean, it's not tax fraud.

What I found was

that someone is stealing
from you, Mr. Sharfe.

Someone is what?

Stealing from you.

You see, this bill says
100 cases of champagne

were delivered
and paid for, right?

The cellar entry here...

says 75.

Now, at $180 a case,
25 cases comes to $4,500.

All these other bills
have the same discrepancy.

All told, in just a few minutes,
I have found that someone

has stolen
at least $29,000 from you,

and probably a great deal more.

Now, if I were you, I would
consult my own accountant

and then I would
notify the police.

Miss, I can't tell you
how much I appreciate this.

You're never going to spend
another nickel in this hotel

as long as you live.

You're redline all the way.

Again, not as a bribe.
Raw gratitude.

Yes, well, thank you
very much, Mr. Sharfe.

Someone from our office should
be by in about three weeks.

That should give you
time to clear this up.

At least.

Good day.

Goodbye. Thank you.


What's wrong, Max?

Now, listen to me.

Cass Harper
is stealing from us.

You take these books
down to Eddy

and tell him to go over them
with a fine-tooth comb.

You check his entries
against our bills.

I know the punk
is stealing from me.

I just don't know how much.

Stay with these books, don't
let them out of your sight,

when he finishes, you bring them
back up here. Now move.

Sammy, I have
a top-level employee

I want watched for stealing--
Cass Harper.

No, no, just watched.

Unless he gets wise
and tries to run.

What do you mean,
"Starting when?" Now!

All right, 20 minutes.
Just get somebody on it quick.

All right.

We got trouble.
Max is steaming.

You just slow down, Freddy.

You give it to me so I can
understand what you're saying.

I'm saying Max is furious!

He knows you've been
ripping off the showroom.

I'm taking these books to Eddy
now so he can check them,

and that means
you'd better get out quick.

I never ripped off a quarter.
I'm not that dumb.

It doesn't matter
you did or you didn't.

You know him.
Thorough like a scientist.

He gets ahold of you,

how you going to explain
all that blackmail cash?

You think he's going
to love you if you tell him

you've been using his hotel
to set up suckers?

Sucker, he'd break you in half!

Maybe I can talk to him,
explain it.

That means you'd
have to include me, Cass.

No way! I'll kill you
before I let you do that.

You hold it just a minute.

No. No more arguments.

I'm here
too long already. Run!


He's got three quarters of a mil
in how many banks?


Mr. Sharfe?

Hi, I'm Laurie
from Luxury Limited,

and I thought you might like
to see Mr. Harper's new car.

What new car?

And I'm telling you,
that's not my car!

Mr. Harper,
a chick drove up in it.

She showed me
your owner's papers.

She took your old one
and drove off.

What can I tell you?

Crazy. This is just crazy.

Such crazy should happen to me.
A $50,000 car.

I wonder how long
he's going to argue about it.

Not long.

Kelly should have Mr. Sharfe
on the scene any second.

Maybe you won it in a raffle.

I didn't win it in a raffle.
That's not my car.


Hey, you! Come back here!

This is Max.
Give me Sammy.

Sammy, where the hell
are your guys?

The punk's already running.

All right, they got
a phone in the car.

So call them
and tell them he took off.

I don't know.
Maybe he's going to his place.

I just don't want him to get
away clean. You understand me?

Let me know.

There he comes.

I'd be willing
to bet a year's pay

that every bit
of blackmail evidence

is in that attach? case.

Where are you
ever going to find a sucker

to take a bet like that?

One could always hope.

JILL: Uh-oh.
Looks like somebody else

is looking for Cass.

What are we going to do now?

They're going to get
to Cass before we do.

Well, prudence would indicate
we just follow both cars

at a reasonable distance
and wait for a break.

How much gas is really
left in the Rolls?

Five, maybe six miles.
Just enough to get him

right out in the middle
of nowhere.

Let's hang back a little.


We were told to take you

for a little walk
in the desert, Mr. Harper.

Look, I'm not a thief.
I didn't steal from Mr. Sharfe.

We don't know
any Mr. Sharfe.

We don't know
anything about stealing.

All we know is to take you
for a walk in the desert.

Look, I'm telling you,
I'm not a thief.

I'm a blackmailer.

I know Max, he's a little mad
because I used his hotel, but--

We're talking, not walking.
Now, we want to walk. Come on.

I'm a blackmailer.
You see this case?

It's full of pictures, see?
Important people.

I'll tell you what.
I'll make you guys a deal.

You let me go,
and you take the whole thing.

You can have the whole deal.
Make yourselves rich.

That would put us
in the trouble you're in.

Just take a look at what I got!

We're not here to look
at dirty pictures. Come on.

Hello? Hey, you got
car trouble?

You make a noise, Mr. Harper,
you'll regret it. I promise you.

Fellas, can we help?

No, thanks.

Our friend's sick.
We're getting him some air.

I'm a nurse.
Maybe I can help.

Just a hangover. No big thing.

Let's go.

Are you sure?

I'm a doctor, lady.
I'm sure.

Thanks just the same.


I got a half million bucks.
I'll give you half.

No, thanks.

Take it all,
but please leave me alone.

Look, why don't you shut up,
Mr. Harper?

This is going to be rough
enough on you as it is.


You know, I almost
feel sorry for him.

You what?

I said "almost."

Wash your mouth out
with soap, Bosley.

Well, in the large
philosophic sense,

he is our fellow man.

Not mine!
Not mine!

You owe me a soda.

Yeah, and the addresses of all
the other blackmail victims

were in the attach? case
with the evidence.

We called them

and told them that the evidence
had been destroyed.

Look, I'm not sure
that you'll approve,

but I put the calls
on Mr. Mallin's bill.

Fine. Where are the Angels?

I'm not sure.
They took Mrs. Mallin with them.

Something about doing something

that they felt as women
they had to do.


Hello, Cass, baby.

Good to see you.

We've notified all your
former blackmail victims

that the evidence
against them has been burned.

And we told them
who you are and where you are,

and they just can't wait
to come visit you.

Remember all that money
you squeezed from us?

Won't do you
any good now, Cass.

For once, a louse gets
exactly what he deserves.

So, we would
like to leave you

a little something
to remember us by.

Here we go.

We'll make these good.

Sure hope
this doesn't tickle.

Be careful.

It doesn't hurt,
does it, Cass?

Kelly, how do you spell...