Cash Register (2018–…): Season 1, Episode 15 - Excuses, Excuses - full transcript
Shuni uses shaming on the employees.
Checkout
Maybe you have
a dentist appointment.
Huh? -Too simple.
Gastric lavage?
Too disgusting.
Your wife having an abortion.
Too far-fetched.
Then it's Grandma's funeral.
-I killed 3 grandmas already.
Another grandma -
she'll start asking questions.
This Thursday,
Shira stuck us with a cleanup.
I'm looking for an excuse to bail.
-And I'm helping him out.
Helping...
You're present in the search space.
Does Judaism permit lying?
-Heaven forbid.
Specifically, in this case,
the rabbi gave me permission.
Did God give permission too?
They can work that out among themselves.
Why can't you stay on Thursday?
-Why can't I stay on Thursday?
He calls himself a Jew.
-Oy...
It's the celebration
of miracle maker Rabbi Gamliel Hatishbi.
This guy's a kid, he doesn't know.
Hey, ba-boom!
-What?
Me, you, Thursday, we go outside,
pour fuel on the storeroom,
big fire, bye bye cleanup,
Nissim goes to celebration!
Some idea, huh? Kickass excuse.
Burning down the supermarket
is criminal, not an excuse. It's prison!
How's it going, hot stuffs?
Oh, princessa.
-Marilyn Monroe.
What's crackin'?
-We're looking for an excuse for Thursday.
And you didn't ask
the master of excuses?
An abortion?
-I said that, primadonna doesn't want.
Who does abortions on Thursday
at 10 p.m.?
That's when they do it.
No waiting, 30 minutes and out.
Hold on, what's "Thursday at 10 p.m."?
-That stupid cleanup.
Didn't you hear her this morning?
-Who listens to her?
I was asleep at "good morning."
10 p.m.?
Whoa, this is serious.
What's your excuse?
Meanwhile I have
my nephew swallowed a spinner.
Or burn the supermarket down.
-The nephew and the spinner isn't bad.
It's elegant.
Okay.
I'm off. -Wait, you said you'd help.
-You're on the right track.
Cool, bye.
What?
"Issachar Bounty"
Hey, hey, look at me.
We've done this a million times.
What if she doesn't believe me?
-That won't happen, Nissim.
If you believe it, she'll believe it.
Your nephew swallowed a spinner.
"Harasho?"
-"Harasho."
I can't hear you. -"Harasho."
Who's the king of excuses?
Me.
-Whose nephew swallowed a spinner?
Mine. -I can't hear you!
-Mine, mine, mine!
Nissim, good luck, brother.
I told my sister a million times:
"Don't let him put
the spinner in his mouth...
"He'll swallow it!"
Kohava, he'll be alright. -Yes,
but what about cleanup night?
Who will help my friends?
wasn't here for last cleanup either.
Kohava, you're so kind,
but that doesn't matter now.
You should be with your sister,
with your nephew in the hospital,
your friends will gladly clean for you.
Here's Nissim. Right, Nissim?
You'll gladly clean for Kohava?
Gladly.
That's friendship.
You crossed a red line.
-Crossed red line.
Look at me.
-Look on him.
Can you just let her..:
-Hold on.
Not only did you go
into Shira before me,
you stole the excuse I came up with
by the sweat of my brow! -And mine.
You said "spinner,"
I said "nephew."
A nephew swallowed a spinner...
some excuse.
Anyone could think that up,
it happens. -Smarty pants...
And she calls herself a friend...
You're garbage juice.
I'm in a hurry... -Hold on!
I'm garbage juice?
You're garbage juice, mister. -Me?
Him? -Yes, you!
-Why me? -Why him?
You be the judge, come on...
You tell me who's a true friend.
Does a true friend secretly
come up with an excuse for himself?
Or does a true friend hear
that we're getting stuck with cleanup
and look out for their friend, huh?
-I don't... -Wait, you listen to me.
If you don't tell Shira
that your nephew has recovered
and stay here Thursday to clean,
I'm done with you for good. -For goods!
Guys, I don't want to interrupt, but...
-Hold on!
Will you tell her or not?
You won't?
No problem, you'll hear from me.
And it won't be good.
Who are you to threaten me, huh?!
Who are you to threaten me?!
-Finish... -Hold on!
Who are you to threaten me, Nissim?!
Am I ashamed of what I did?
No. Am I proud of it?
Why not?
-Are you even busy on Thursday?
No. Why?
You want to come over?
Then why are you bailing
on cleanup night? -What?
Because it's cleanup night.
A night of cleanup.
Did something good ever come out
of a cleanup?
Even if it was cleanup at a casino
I wouldn't come.
We can't decide - Maldives or Sicily.
I want to return this, please.
Mikones?! Are you mad?
With all those Israelis?!
Always on the phone,
thinking they're entitled. Not for me.
Will you give me a refund?
-Forgive me for interrupting...
may I ask why you're returning this?
-Is that relevant?
Pitzkaleh, I'll call you back,
I'm getting grief at the supermarket.
I don't want to give you grief,
I just want to know
if the product is spoiled.
My son didn't like it.
-But it's been eaten.
Of course. He tasted it
and he didn't like it.
Yes, but it's not...
a little bite to taste.
It's... three quarters...
-He tasted it, he didn't like it,
so I tasted it too. It's not tasty.
My husband and daughter tasted it...
It's not tasty.
Forgive me, but if it's a matter of taste
and it wasn't spoiled,
I can't give you a refund. -Why?
-Because I can't sell it.
Did you try? -No.
-Sweetheart, let's cut out the games.
I want a refund and I want it now.
-I can't give you a refund. -No problem.
What are you doing?
-I really hope you're photogenic.
What are you doing?
-Justice, that's what.
I am at "Issachar Bounty" in Yavne...
-Uh... -I bought a chocolate croissant...
that is not fit for human consumption.
-Alright.
When I told the manager, Ms...
Shira Steinbum... -Steinbuch, okay.
ot only did she not offer me compensation,
she started bullying me... -Okay,
at "Issachar Bounty"
we don't bully our customers
and you will get a refund, Ma'am.
Put down the camera.
No problem, a refund
for one chocolate croissant - 1.80.
Here you go.
You can take any product
for the same price.
Too bad it had to come to this.
-Enjoy your shopping.
Shuni Stratiner, customer
This is so old...
-Videos of the kids?
No. Shaming.
Old shaming videos.
How time flies..
Shaming changed the rules of the game.
Finally an ordinary citizen
can wage war against a wrongdoer.
Shame him, humiliate him,
ruin his life. Justice.
And it has a nice ring to it, no?
Shaming.
Sha-ming
Here, Ma'am.
What's this?
-500 grains minced meat.
But why is it ground so rough?
-It's the machine, Ma'am.
Did I ask you or the machine?
What?
-I asked you, didn't I?
Then bring me what I asked for.
Ma'am, please...
always complaining, unsatisfied...
I work with machine,
whatever comes out, comes out.
I put a sticker on and give you.
Ma'am, I'm no psychologist,
I'm a butcher!
-Oh, I see.
No problem.
Just a second. There.
am at "Issachar Bounty" in Yavne.
The "nice" butcher is refusing
to give me what I asked for.
So I'm appealing to everyone...
-Put that down, Ma'am.
To stop shopping...
-Put it down.
Put it down, Ma'am, I'll do
—He'll do it.
A little more. More, more.
Great, a new trend!
It's a little not good,
customer takes phone,
"Hello, this is Ma'am on Facebook
at supermarket in Yavne."
The whole country knows
you're a bad employee, it's a catastrophe!
"Issachar Bounty"
The PA system wasn't designed
to play Ladino songs all day long.
I respect that.
-Thank you, Kohava,
and the 7th item
cleanup night.
I remind you,
everyone must be here,
except Kohava.
How's your nephew, by the way?
-Getting better, slowly. Thank you.
Poor thing...
So, I wish him good health,
and all the rest of you
who will be here for cleanup,
don't think I don't appreciate it,
I prepared a surprise for you,
but I won't say what it is,
I just want you to know
that it's awesome.
You started so finish.
-No, I'm not telling.
No! -Then why did you tell us?
-Hint, hint.
Shira! Shira!
-You'll get it out of me!
I don't want to..
-Shira!
You guys are so impatient...
I'll give you a little hint.
Tiny. Let's just say
that one of the greatest performances
will happen at this supermarket.
That's it. -What? Now you tell me?
I locked with a key... -Wait.
-And tossed it in the sea.
Tell us what it is.
-But I want it to be a surprise!
Why does it have to be a surprise?
Shira?
She's not here, come.
She usually doesn't lock it,
the wiseass.
Of course not.
Here.
This will get your energy up.
"The cleanup night schedule."
"Surprise for the employees..."
The Ladino Brothers!
Here at our supermarket!
Who would have thought I'd get
to see the Ladino Brothers face to face?!
What are the odds the Ladino Brothers
would be Shira's surprise?!
I thought you won't be here
for cleanup night. -Really?
For the Ladino Brothers I'll lick
the sewage drain at the meat counter!
I'd show you my tattoo,
but kids will watch this. Wait.
Good thing you...
Nissim, I don't need his excuse.
Nissim!
Nissim.
Nissim.
Do you hear something, Anatoly?
-I hear a buzz.
I know you're angry.
-There it is again.
How about calling the exterminator?
Nissim, stop, come on.
I don't deserve this.
I got hurt too...
-Hello, exterminator?
There's a rat...
A big blonde one.
Nissim, please, don't do this to me.
How can I show you I'm sorry?
You want me to...
Here, I'll eat the gristle.
You want me to eat the gristle?
I'm eating the gristle.
'm eating the gristle, Nissim.
-Chop off your finger.
I'm chopping off my finger.
I'm chopping off my finger.
Which finger?
Which should I chop off?
Okay, I'm chopping off this finger.
-Chop it.
It won't chop.
It has to be sharpened.
-Try this one.
Come on, Nissim, look at me.
I want you to bail on cleanup
instead of me.
What happened?
What got cancelled?
Don't you know me better than that?
-No.
Nothing got cancelled.
I realized I made a mistake.
I hurt a friend from my flesh.
What about your nephew
who swallowed a spinner? -What?
We'll find an excuse
that will make him all better.
He pooped it out.
It doesn't matter anymore.
It's too late,
that spinner excuse was the bomb.
Okay.
Here. -What's this?
-Take a look.
Blood in the urine?
Blood in the urine?
But that's your grandmother's excuse.
Nissim, I want it to be yours.
I can't take your blood in the urine.
You use it only when...
No arguments, Nissim.
-Nissim, don't take it, Nissim.
She's a con.
Honey and then... she stings.
I want you to forgive me, Nissim.
-Nissim, don't forgive her.
Do you forgive me, Nissim?
Do you forgive me or not, Nissim?
I forgive.
-You forgave? -Forgiven.
Nissim, I don't believe it!
You killed me!
You ugly piece of garbage!
Don't ever do that to me again!
You scum! -Fine, okay.
Come here.
I'm telling you, Pitzkaleh.
A juicer for 9.90.
Me? Buy made in China?
It's German, sure.
It says 9.90.
-Uh, excuse me?
Hold on, Pitzkaleh. Yes?
I overheard your error.
The price of this juicer is 879 before VAT
and not as you stated.
No, no, no, not at all.
It says 9.90.
Must be an unintentional discharge
from the pricing machine.
I'll tell Daisy to be careful next time.
-Pitzkaleh, I'll get back to you.
I gather this is your system,
throwing dust in one's eyes
and then sticking them with the bill?
No, no, it's... just the correct price.
So you insist on trampling
the ordinary citizen?
I'm not trampling on anyone...
-I see. Okay.
Oh, what a cool case you have...
I am at "Issachar Bounty" in Yavne.
-The leading supermarket in town!
With me is...
Ramzi Abed Ramzi,
who purposely puts
erroneous prices on products.
What do you have to say, Ramzi?
Talk, the country is listening.
-Okay.
First of all,
hello to all the viewers.
My name is Ramzi Abed Ramzi.
I've been in retail for 13 years.
Please visit our humble supermarket
in Yavne to enjoy a variety of specials
and super-specials...
-No, no, what are you doing?
Talking to the citizens who will come.
-This is a shaming video.
Do you know what shaming is?
-Shaming?
It's a video I post online
and get the entire country to hate you.
What...
-You heard me!
So I suggest you make sure
I get the juicer for 9.90,
otherwise you'll get things
thrown at you in the street.
You don't know who
you're messing with!
And this is the ugly Israeli,
Ladies and Gentlemen.
Mercilessly telling off
an innocent supermarket employee
who doesn't even know Hebrew!
-Kohava, Kohava. -Silence, Ramzi!
What do you have to say to that,
Mrs. Shuni Stratiner from Yavne?
Kohava, really,
it was a misunderstanding,
please, Kohava, I have a career.
-Coaching isn't a career.
I have a husband, children.
-You won't get away with this, sweetie.
Admit it.
Coaching is not a career.
Coaching is not a career.
-Again.
Coaching is not a career.
-That's it.
Really... I^ohava, please...
it was in the heat of the moment.
Tell that to Guy Lerer when you cry
on his shoulder tomorrow.
No, no, there's no need, no.
I'll do anything you ask.
Kohava, please, please,
don't post that.
Please, please, please! Kohava...
-Next time you whip out your phone
at one of our employees,
even by mistake,
even if you want to check
if you have parsley in your teeth
and the camera turned around
to one of our employees, boom!
It'll be on Facebook, you got it?
-Yes.
Now get outta here.
-Alright.
And take that juicer.
You're gonna pay full price. -Of course.
Kohava,
flow can I ever thank you?
How? I'll tell you how.
I'm going to nap in the bakery dept.
• Wake me up in 40-45 minutes.
Thank you again, Kohava, really...
-It's all good.
Tell me, what are you going to do
with the video? -What video, dude?
My camera's been broken for a year.
-What?
I just wanted to scare her
so she'd leave us alone.
And I put a screw in her olives
so she'll know not to mess with us.
Listen to me good, Ramzi.
The customer...
is the enemy. Remember that.
Lookie here.
The filmer is now the filmed.
Amnon? -Kohava.
-Amnon, what are you doing?
Filming for Facebook,
so everyone can see
how you swindled the lady. -Amnon.
Don't "Amnon" me!
People will finally know who you are!
Do you have anything to say
before I post this on Facebook?
Yes, can you tag me? -What?
Someone is always shaming me on video
and I can never find it.
You don't care if people see the video?
-You're right, it's boo-boom enough.
How about we shoot it again?
This time I'll throw bulgur at you?
Maybe tahini or some snot...
-Snot? -Yes.
You said "shaming."
You want to film me shaming?
-Violence! Violence!
Get over here, you bozo,
you said you wanna film a shaming!
Does anyone know what time it is?
I can't take this guys, I can't..
Ramzi.
-You're getting the dust on me!
Ramzi!
Ramzul, don't do that now!
Spare us!
Sweetie, have some coffee.
-Where is it?
Here, sweetie, here.
-Where?
Thanks, sweetie.
-So you don't get tired, Kohava.
I'm too old for this clean
Not that I cleaned when I was young,
but now, even more so,
but for the Ladino Brothers
it's to the death.
Guys, guys, guys!
-Oh, what?
You're doing such a lovely,
lovely, lovely job. -Thanks, sweetie.
Okay, each one of you finish
what you started. -We're done.
And in ten minutes we'll meet
at the main checkout.
It's time for the surprise.
Okay.
Good evening to "Issachar Bounty"
First I want to wish Nissim
a speedy recovery. -Right.
They found something in his...
-Blood in his urine! -Yes.
Isn't that his grandmother's?
-Not now.
Main thing is he be healthy.
Okay, I want to say thank you
and here is the surprise
for all the lovely employees
who came in for cleanup
even though you knew
you won't get paid.
-What? -What's that?
Since 6 a.m., overtime...
-I put a flyer on the bulletin board...
Let her talk! -That says no pay.
-I read it, let her... -Thank you, Kohava.
Yes? Next.
-So now, on to the surprise. -Yes?
One of my favorite acts ever,
yours too I bet, give it up for,
be as excited as I am..
it's "Ramzi and the Barcodes!"
Where's the barcodes, Ramzi?
Where's the barcodes?
-What?! What?!
Where's Roy and Guy?
-Yes! -Who are Roy and...
The Ladino Brothers!
-Kohava, what are you talking about?
Ladino liturgies from father's home!
-Where are they?!
Kohava... -I saw it on your computer,
the Ladino Brothers!
Where are the brothers?
-You looked on my computer?!
What did I ask,
what did you answer?!
Show respect for the artist.
-It's Ramzi!
Ramzi plays the guitar and sings
and this is the performance, Kohava.
can't believe I stayed here
to the middle of the night
for this school play...
was promised the Ladino Brothers
and I got Ramzi on a crate.
It said "The Ladino Brothers,"
saw it with my own eyes... You saw...
Stop, turn that thing off...
Turn off the camera, I'm sorry.
Kohava has her limits too.
How does the phrase go?
"Don't mess with the Nissim."
Or the Anatoly.
After Kohava stole my excuse,
I thought, what's the one thing
that can get her back to cleanup?
Two words:
Ladi-noBrothers.
We went into Shira's office,
deleted Ramzi's show,
wrote "Ladino Brothers" instead.
So Kohava will know,
you don't mess with the Nissim.
Or the Anatoly.
-Cut it out.
I'm getting electrocuted.
"For a year
"We hardly knew
"How the nights passed in my fields..."
"Once there were sycamores here..."
"Yes, this is,
"Yes this is..."
I don't know the words.
-"The sycamore garden.
"There were more like these
"Back in the day..."
Big Chief!
"Yes this is, yes this is,
"This is to the sycamore garden..."
Five, six... three, two and...
"Issachar Bounty
"The price is low
the customer precious
"Issachar Bounty
"The price is low
the customer precious."
Maybe you have
a dentist appointment.
Huh? -Too simple.
Gastric lavage?
Too disgusting.
Your wife having an abortion.
Too far-fetched.
Then it's Grandma's funeral.
-I killed 3 grandmas already.
Another grandma -
she'll start asking questions.
This Thursday,
Shira stuck us with a cleanup.
I'm looking for an excuse to bail.
-And I'm helping him out.
Helping...
You're present in the search space.
Does Judaism permit lying?
-Heaven forbid.
Specifically, in this case,
the rabbi gave me permission.
Did God give permission too?
They can work that out among themselves.
Why can't you stay on Thursday?
-Why can't I stay on Thursday?
He calls himself a Jew.
-Oy...
It's the celebration
of miracle maker Rabbi Gamliel Hatishbi.
This guy's a kid, he doesn't know.
Hey, ba-boom!
-What?
Me, you, Thursday, we go outside,
pour fuel on the storeroom,
big fire, bye bye cleanup,
Nissim goes to celebration!
Some idea, huh? Kickass excuse.
Burning down the supermarket
is criminal, not an excuse. It's prison!
How's it going, hot stuffs?
Oh, princessa.
-Marilyn Monroe.
What's crackin'?
-We're looking for an excuse for Thursday.
And you didn't ask
the master of excuses?
An abortion?
-I said that, primadonna doesn't want.
Who does abortions on Thursday
at 10 p.m.?
That's when they do it.
No waiting, 30 minutes and out.
Hold on, what's "Thursday at 10 p.m."?
-That stupid cleanup.
Didn't you hear her this morning?
-Who listens to her?
I was asleep at "good morning."
10 p.m.?
Whoa, this is serious.
What's your excuse?
Meanwhile I have
my nephew swallowed a spinner.
Or burn the supermarket down.
-The nephew and the spinner isn't bad.
It's elegant.
Okay.
I'm off. -Wait, you said you'd help.
-You're on the right track.
Cool, bye.
What?
"Issachar Bounty"
Hey, hey, look at me.
We've done this a million times.
What if she doesn't believe me?
-That won't happen, Nissim.
If you believe it, she'll believe it.
Your nephew swallowed a spinner.
"Harasho?"
-"Harasho."
I can't hear you. -"Harasho."
Who's the king of excuses?
Me.
-Whose nephew swallowed a spinner?
Mine. -I can't hear you!
-Mine, mine, mine!
Nissim, good luck, brother.
I told my sister a million times:
"Don't let him put
the spinner in his mouth...
"He'll swallow it!"
Kohava, he'll be alright. -Yes,
but what about cleanup night?
Who will help my friends?
wasn't here for last cleanup either.
Kohava, you're so kind,
but that doesn't matter now.
You should be with your sister,
with your nephew in the hospital,
your friends will gladly clean for you.
Here's Nissim. Right, Nissim?
You'll gladly clean for Kohava?
Gladly.
That's friendship.
You crossed a red line.
-Crossed red line.
Look at me.
-Look on him.
Can you just let her..:
-Hold on.
Not only did you go
into Shira before me,
you stole the excuse I came up with
by the sweat of my brow! -And mine.
You said "spinner,"
I said "nephew."
A nephew swallowed a spinner...
some excuse.
Anyone could think that up,
it happens. -Smarty pants...
And she calls herself a friend...
You're garbage juice.
I'm in a hurry... -Hold on!
I'm garbage juice?
You're garbage juice, mister. -Me?
Him? -Yes, you!
-Why me? -Why him?
You be the judge, come on...
You tell me who's a true friend.
Does a true friend secretly
come up with an excuse for himself?
Or does a true friend hear
that we're getting stuck with cleanup
and look out for their friend, huh?
-I don't... -Wait, you listen to me.
If you don't tell Shira
that your nephew has recovered
and stay here Thursday to clean,
I'm done with you for good. -For goods!
Guys, I don't want to interrupt, but...
-Hold on!
Will you tell her or not?
You won't?
No problem, you'll hear from me.
And it won't be good.
Who are you to threaten me, huh?!
Who are you to threaten me?!
-Finish... -Hold on!
Who are you to threaten me, Nissim?!
Am I ashamed of what I did?
No. Am I proud of it?
Why not?
-Are you even busy on Thursday?
No. Why?
You want to come over?
Then why are you bailing
on cleanup night? -What?
Because it's cleanup night.
A night of cleanup.
Did something good ever come out
of a cleanup?
Even if it was cleanup at a casino
I wouldn't come.
We can't decide - Maldives or Sicily.
I want to return this, please.
Mikones?! Are you mad?
With all those Israelis?!
Always on the phone,
thinking they're entitled. Not for me.
Will you give me a refund?
-Forgive me for interrupting...
may I ask why you're returning this?
-Is that relevant?
Pitzkaleh, I'll call you back,
I'm getting grief at the supermarket.
I don't want to give you grief,
I just want to know
if the product is spoiled.
My son didn't like it.
-But it's been eaten.
Of course. He tasted it
and he didn't like it.
Yes, but it's not...
a little bite to taste.
It's... three quarters...
-He tasted it, he didn't like it,
so I tasted it too. It's not tasty.
My husband and daughter tasted it...
It's not tasty.
Forgive me, but if it's a matter of taste
and it wasn't spoiled,
I can't give you a refund. -Why?
-Because I can't sell it.
Did you try? -No.
-Sweetheart, let's cut out the games.
I want a refund and I want it now.
-I can't give you a refund. -No problem.
What are you doing?
-I really hope you're photogenic.
What are you doing?
-Justice, that's what.
I am at "Issachar Bounty" in Yavne...
-Uh... -I bought a chocolate croissant...
that is not fit for human consumption.
-Alright.
When I told the manager, Ms...
Shira Steinbum... -Steinbuch, okay.
ot only did she not offer me compensation,
she started bullying me... -Okay,
at "Issachar Bounty"
we don't bully our customers
and you will get a refund, Ma'am.
Put down the camera.
No problem, a refund
for one chocolate croissant - 1.80.
Here you go.
You can take any product
for the same price.
Too bad it had to come to this.
-Enjoy your shopping.
Shuni Stratiner, customer
This is so old...
-Videos of the kids?
No. Shaming.
Old shaming videos.
How time flies..
Shaming changed the rules of the game.
Finally an ordinary citizen
can wage war against a wrongdoer.
Shame him, humiliate him,
ruin his life. Justice.
And it has a nice ring to it, no?
Shaming.
Sha-ming
Here, Ma'am.
What's this?
-500 grains minced meat.
But why is it ground so rough?
-It's the machine, Ma'am.
Did I ask you or the machine?
What?
-I asked you, didn't I?
Then bring me what I asked for.
Ma'am, please...
always complaining, unsatisfied...
I work with machine,
whatever comes out, comes out.
I put a sticker on and give you.
Ma'am, I'm no psychologist,
I'm a butcher!
-Oh, I see.
No problem.
Just a second. There.
am at "Issachar Bounty" in Yavne.
The "nice" butcher is refusing
to give me what I asked for.
So I'm appealing to everyone...
-Put that down, Ma'am.
To stop shopping...
-Put it down.
Put it down, Ma'am, I'll do
—He'll do it.
A little more. More, more.
Great, a new trend!
It's a little not good,
customer takes phone,
"Hello, this is Ma'am on Facebook
at supermarket in Yavne."
The whole country knows
you're a bad employee, it's a catastrophe!
"Issachar Bounty"
The PA system wasn't designed
to play Ladino songs all day long.
I respect that.
-Thank you, Kohava,
and the 7th item
cleanup night.
I remind you,
everyone must be here,
except Kohava.
How's your nephew, by the way?
-Getting better, slowly. Thank you.
Poor thing...
So, I wish him good health,
and all the rest of you
who will be here for cleanup,
don't think I don't appreciate it,
I prepared a surprise for you,
but I won't say what it is,
I just want you to know
that it's awesome.
You started so finish.
-No, I'm not telling.
No! -Then why did you tell us?
-Hint, hint.
Shira! Shira!
-You'll get it out of me!
I don't want to..
-Shira!
You guys are so impatient...
I'll give you a little hint.
Tiny. Let's just say
that one of the greatest performances
will happen at this supermarket.
That's it. -What? Now you tell me?
I locked with a key... -Wait.
-And tossed it in the sea.
Tell us what it is.
-But I want it to be a surprise!
Why does it have to be a surprise?
Shira?
She's not here, come.
She usually doesn't lock it,
the wiseass.
Of course not.
Here.
This will get your energy up.
"The cleanup night schedule."
"Surprise for the employees..."
The Ladino Brothers!
Here at our supermarket!
Who would have thought I'd get
to see the Ladino Brothers face to face?!
What are the odds the Ladino Brothers
would be Shira's surprise?!
I thought you won't be here
for cleanup night. -Really?
For the Ladino Brothers I'll lick
the sewage drain at the meat counter!
I'd show you my tattoo,
but kids will watch this. Wait.
Good thing you...
Nissim, I don't need his excuse.
Nissim!
Nissim.
Nissim.
Do you hear something, Anatoly?
-I hear a buzz.
I know you're angry.
-There it is again.
How about calling the exterminator?
Nissim, stop, come on.
I don't deserve this.
I got hurt too...
-Hello, exterminator?
There's a rat...
A big blonde one.
Nissim, please, don't do this to me.
How can I show you I'm sorry?
You want me to...
Here, I'll eat the gristle.
You want me to eat the gristle?
I'm eating the gristle.
'm eating the gristle, Nissim.
-Chop off your finger.
I'm chopping off my finger.
I'm chopping off my finger.
Which finger?
Which should I chop off?
Okay, I'm chopping off this finger.
-Chop it.
It won't chop.
It has to be sharpened.
-Try this one.
Come on, Nissim, look at me.
I want you to bail on cleanup
instead of me.
What happened?
What got cancelled?
Don't you know me better than that?
-No.
Nothing got cancelled.
I realized I made a mistake.
I hurt a friend from my flesh.
What about your nephew
who swallowed a spinner? -What?
We'll find an excuse
that will make him all better.
He pooped it out.
It doesn't matter anymore.
It's too late,
that spinner excuse was the bomb.
Okay.
Here. -What's this?
-Take a look.
Blood in the urine?
Blood in the urine?
But that's your grandmother's excuse.
Nissim, I want it to be yours.
I can't take your blood in the urine.
You use it only when...
No arguments, Nissim.
-Nissim, don't take it, Nissim.
She's a con.
Honey and then... she stings.
I want you to forgive me, Nissim.
-Nissim, don't forgive her.
Do you forgive me, Nissim?
Do you forgive me or not, Nissim?
I forgive.
-You forgave? -Forgiven.
Nissim, I don't believe it!
You killed me!
You ugly piece of garbage!
Don't ever do that to me again!
You scum! -Fine, okay.
Come here.
I'm telling you, Pitzkaleh.
A juicer for 9.90.
Me? Buy made in China?
It's German, sure.
It says 9.90.
-Uh, excuse me?
Hold on, Pitzkaleh. Yes?
I overheard your error.
The price of this juicer is 879 before VAT
and not as you stated.
No, no, no, not at all.
It says 9.90.
Must be an unintentional discharge
from the pricing machine.
I'll tell Daisy to be careful next time.
-Pitzkaleh, I'll get back to you.
I gather this is your system,
throwing dust in one's eyes
and then sticking them with the bill?
No, no, it's... just the correct price.
So you insist on trampling
the ordinary citizen?
I'm not trampling on anyone...
-I see. Okay.
Oh, what a cool case you have...
I am at "Issachar Bounty" in Yavne.
-The leading supermarket in town!
With me is...
Ramzi Abed Ramzi,
who purposely puts
erroneous prices on products.
What do you have to say, Ramzi?
Talk, the country is listening.
-Okay.
First of all,
hello to all the viewers.
My name is Ramzi Abed Ramzi.
I've been in retail for 13 years.
Please visit our humble supermarket
in Yavne to enjoy a variety of specials
and super-specials...
-No, no, what are you doing?
Talking to the citizens who will come.
-This is a shaming video.
Do you know what shaming is?
-Shaming?
It's a video I post online
and get the entire country to hate you.
What...
-You heard me!
So I suggest you make sure
I get the juicer for 9.90,
otherwise you'll get things
thrown at you in the street.
You don't know who
you're messing with!
And this is the ugly Israeli,
Ladies and Gentlemen.
Mercilessly telling off
an innocent supermarket employee
who doesn't even know Hebrew!
-Kohava, Kohava. -Silence, Ramzi!
What do you have to say to that,
Mrs. Shuni Stratiner from Yavne?
Kohava, really,
it was a misunderstanding,
please, Kohava, I have a career.
-Coaching isn't a career.
I have a husband, children.
-You won't get away with this, sweetie.
Admit it.
Coaching is not a career.
Coaching is not a career.
-Again.
Coaching is not a career.
-That's it.
Really... I^ohava, please...
it was in the heat of the moment.
Tell that to Guy Lerer when you cry
on his shoulder tomorrow.
No, no, there's no need, no.
I'll do anything you ask.
Kohava, please, please,
don't post that.
Please, please, please! Kohava...
-Next time you whip out your phone
at one of our employees,
even by mistake,
even if you want to check
if you have parsley in your teeth
and the camera turned around
to one of our employees, boom!
It'll be on Facebook, you got it?
-Yes.
Now get outta here.
-Alright.
And take that juicer.
You're gonna pay full price. -Of course.
Kohava,
flow can I ever thank you?
How? I'll tell you how.
I'm going to nap in the bakery dept.
• Wake me up in 40-45 minutes.
Thank you again, Kohava, really...
-It's all good.
Tell me, what are you going to do
with the video? -What video, dude?
My camera's been broken for a year.
-What?
I just wanted to scare her
so she'd leave us alone.
And I put a screw in her olives
so she'll know not to mess with us.
Listen to me good, Ramzi.
The customer...
is the enemy. Remember that.
Lookie here.
The filmer is now the filmed.
Amnon? -Kohava.
-Amnon, what are you doing?
Filming for Facebook,
so everyone can see
how you swindled the lady. -Amnon.
Don't "Amnon" me!
People will finally know who you are!
Do you have anything to say
before I post this on Facebook?
Yes, can you tag me? -What?
Someone is always shaming me on video
and I can never find it.
You don't care if people see the video?
-You're right, it's boo-boom enough.
How about we shoot it again?
This time I'll throw bulgur at you?
Maybe tahini or some snot...
-Snot? -Yes.
You said "shaming."
You want to film me shaming?
-Violence! Violence!
Get over here, you bozo,
you said you wanna film a shaming!
Does anyone know what time it is?
I can't take this guys, I can't..
Ramzi.
-You're getting the dust on me!
Ramzi!
Ramzul, don't do that now!
Spare us!
Sweetie, have some coffee.
-Where is it?
Here, sweetie, here.
-Where?
Thanks, sweetie.
-So you don't get tired, Kohava.
I'm too old for this clean
Not that I cleaned when I was young,
but now, even more so,
but for the Ladino Brothers
it's to the death.
Guys, guys, guys!
-Oh, what?
You're doing such a lovely,
lovely, lovely job. -Thanks, sweetie.
Okay, each one of you finish
what you started. -We're done.
And in ten minutes we'll meet
at the main checkout.
It's time for the surprise.
Okay.
Good evening to "Issachar Bounty"
First I want to wish Nissim
a speedy recovery. -Right.
They found something in his...
-Blood in his urine! -Yes.
Isn't that his grandmother's?
-Not now.
Main thing is he be healthy.
Okay, I want to say thank you
and here is the surprise
for all the lovely employees
who came in for cleanup
even though you knew
you won't get paid.
-What? -What's that?
Since 6 a.m., overtime...
-I put a flyer on the bulletin board...
Let her talk! -That says no pay.
-I read it, let her... -Thank you, Kohava.
Yes? Next.
-So now, on to the surprise. -Yes?
One of my favorite acts ever,
yours too I bet, give it up for,
be as excited as I am..
it's "Ramzi and the Barcodes!"
Where's the barcodes, Ramzi?
Where's the barcodes?
-What?! What?!
Where's Roy and Guy?
-Yes! -Who are Roy and...
The Ladino Brothers!
-Kohava, what are you talking about?
Ladino liturgies from father's home!
-Where are they?!
Kohava... -I saw it on your computer,
the Ladino Brothers!
Where are the brothers?
-You looked on my computer?!
What did I ask,
what did you answer?!
Show respect for the artist.
-It's Ramzi!
Ramzi plays the guitar and sings
and this is the performance, Kohava.
can't believe I stayed here
to the middle of the night
for this school play...
was promised the Ladino Brothers
and I got Ramzi on a crate.
It said "The Ladino Brothers,"
saw it with my own eyes... You saw...
Stop, turn that thing off...
Turn off the camera, I'm sorry.
Kohava has her limits too.
How does the phrase go?
"Don't mess with the Nissim."
Or the Anatoly.
After Kohava stole my excuse,
I thought, what's the one thing
that can get her back to cleanup?
Two words:
Ladi-noBrothers.
We went into Shira's office,
deleted Ramzi's show,
wrote "Ladino Brothers" instead.
So Kohava will know,
you don't mess with the Nissim.
Or the Anatoly.
-Cut it out.
I'm getting electrocuted.
"For a year
"We hardly knew
"How the nights passed in my fields..."
"Once there were sycamores here..."
"Yes, this is,
"Yes this is..."
I don't know the words.
-"The sycamore garden.
"There were more like these
"Back in the day..."
Big Chief!
"Yes this is, yes this is,
"This is to the sycamore garden..."
Five, six... three, two and...
"Issachar Bounty
"The price is low
the customer precious
"Issachar Bounty
"The price is low
the customer precious."