Cagney & Lacey (1981–1988): Season 2, Episode 8 - Conduct Unbecoming - full transcript
As the 14th Precinct eagerly awaits the results of their shared lottery ticket, Cagney and Lacey risk their careers by helping a suspended officer crack an illegal gun ring.
But if you want to play, you got to pay.
Looking to invest
a little pin money, sweetheart?
Pin this, Mac.
Come on, Mary Beth,
this is the easiest collar we ever made.
Christine, I just don't like to run
into these things the way that you do.
But we're not running in, we're crawling.
I cannot take this money
without talking to Harvey first.
It's a gay magazine.
It's posing in the nude.
Those pictures were taken five years ago,
before I ever became a cop!
Christine, if this thing goes sour,
we could get suspended, too.
Mary Beth, come on.
- What if one of us gets hurt?
- We could always get hurt.
We're here, man, we're here.
You, don't you move!
CARD DEALER: I got your winner here.
Now look, you see how easy that is?
If you want to win, you've got to get in.
If you want to play, you got to pay.
All you got to do is find
a little black queen.
Yes, sir, I got a winner here.
You see how easy that is.
But if you want to play, you got to pay.
You want to win? You got to get in.
She ain't going nowhere. She's right there.
So if you've got a hunch, you better bunch.
Because you cannot accumulate
if you do not speculate.
- There she is, there she is, right there.
- Excuse me.
I'd like to bet here.
Gentlemen, please make room
for the lady.
Looking to invest
a little pin money, sweetheart?
Pin this, Mac.
Fold it up.
LACEY: Chris, take him.
In the truck!
Hey, hey, hey.
Watch the arm. Watch the arm.
Hey, fellow, shut it down, would you, huh?
I'm a cop. I'll give you ID in two minutes.
Just shut it down, please.
- Hey, come on. Take it easy.
- Yuck.
We've got a couple of Al Capones here.
Bunko, assaulting an officer,
resisting arrest.
- Possession of an illegal handgun.
- I never saw it before in my life.
- CAGNEY: Come on, let's go.
- Look, I never saw it before, either.
- Are you all right?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
She took a pretty good
knock out there, sir.
I want you to have an X-ray.
You've got to have an X-ray.
- I don't want any of my detectives...
- I want to get this guy...
- ...walking around hurt.
- I just want to get this guy into Booking.
I'm fine.
Move.
You here again?
Can't stay out of trouble, can you?
I'm gonna give you trouble
tomorrow night, pal.
So, who's ahead
in the racquetball tourney?
Guess.
You could save yourself a lot of
embarrassment and just forfeit right now.
Forfeit this.
Hey, hope I didn't get too rough out there.
No, not at all, Charles.
That's all you came up with,
one Saturday night special?
I thought this guy
was moving them in by the truckload.
What can I tell you?
At least we got something.
Yeah. What I got is a detective
gimping around on a case.
When the DA sees it, he's gonna laugh
in my face, that's what I got.
Come on.
- Be honest. This kid any good or what?
- Yes, sir. He's good.
Been on the job for two weeks,
you got nothing.
Sir, Stephens is terrific out there.
We would have never requested him from
the Anti-Crime Unit if we didn't think so.
I don't know,
these Anti-Crime guys make me nervous.
All the time out in the street,
all the time looking for action.
(SCATTING)
I think they're all a little crazy.
So did you get sprung already?
How's that shoulder?
What shoulder?
I'll take some aspirin, it'll be fine.
All right, what's the next step, team?
Let's line it up.
Okay, our next step is,
our boy here dives back out on the streets,
and we'll see what he comes up with.
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
- I have the new lottery tickets.
- PETRIE: All right.
Feeling lucky.
ISBECKI: Did you buy them
at the candy store?
No, I got them at the liquor store
around the corner.
I told you to buy them at the candy store.
They advanced someone 200 bucks
there last week.
What difference does it make?
We're not going to win anyway.
You're putting out
a negative vibe, La Guardia.
What are you talking about?
We're going to win.
Yeah. So next week,
we'll buy them at the candy store.
- I'll take the first five, if it's all right.
- No!
Three is my lucky number.
I wanted every third one.
- Nobody's going to win.
- Come on, Petrie.
- Can I buy your third one?
- On the phone, Chris. I'm on the phone.
Could I look at the numbers, please,
before I choose?
- Now, Paul, please, I just want to...
- It doesn't matter.
He didn't buy them at the candy store.
We could have 65.
- And this one.
- Will you? Come on.
Just give me five here.
La Guardia, just cut out the third one
on every card for me and I...
You have five.
Mary Beth, you have five, and I have five.
Would you give...
- I'm telling you it doesn't matter, okay?
- Forget it.
I just wanted to look
at all the numbers first.
If it actually mattered,
I'd say something to help you out.
(MUTTERING)
Come on.
(MUTTERING)
(GROANING)
I told him to buy at the candy store.
Where you going?
- To buy some gum.
- Look at your tickets first.
Patience, my friend.
I'll look when I feel the time is right.
What the hell is this? He picks them first,
and he waits till the last to look at them.
Yes! Yes! Yes!
- What?
- Are you all right?
- What happened?
- We've got... We won 1,000 bucks.
$1,000? What's six into $1,000?
About $160 apiece.
I told you not to rush me.
I'm sorry. You were right.
You were absolutely right.
Thank you.
- Where is it? Where is it? Where is it?
- There.
Oh, we won!
See, I told you not to rush me, didn't I?
It'll come to no good.
- Hi, Mommy.
- LACEY: Hiya.
- Did you do your homework, yet?
- I don't have any.
- What's in the bag?
- Dinner. Where's your brother?
He has intramurals.
What's intramurals?
- Hey.
- Hiya, babe.
- What you got?
- Chili.
Oh, good,
because it's always better the second day.
I got artichokes. I got real butter.
I got fillet mignon
cut to order, 1.5 inches thick.
I got a little bottle of
Petite something or other from California,
imported directly for you.
What the heck did you do?
Hit the numbers?
I hate artichokes.
How do you know
you hate artichokes when...
You never tried them, see...
If you do them real salty...
- The lottery pool.
- Yeah. $166.67.
- And a chance at the grand prize.
- What's that?
BOTH: $1 million!
One and six zeroes, 1,000,000.
Now go in the other room, write it down.
One and six zeroes.
Honey, honey. You're gonna
get a hernia here. Don't lift...
I should get lucky more often, huh?
(CAGNEY MOANING)
Oh, yeah.
How much more do you want me
to work on this shoulder, dearie?
$166 worth.
Yeah.
This better be good. This better be good.
Because they got the turkey plate special
over at Clearing's today.
It's good. It's good.
Stephens has turned
the beginnings of a lead.
We want to follow up on it.
- Well?
- Tell him.
Okay, I've been working on a waitress
over at the Coco Club.
There's a history of guns
coming out of that place, sir.
And drugs and hot goods, all kinds of stuff.
You're going to buy me lunch.
She overheard a couple of clowns talking
about a load of Saturday night specials.
We think that they might be
part of a shipment
that was ripped off a couple of weeks ago
from a manufacturer down in Kentucky.
SAMUELS: You been working her long?
Six, seven months now. Yeah.
I met her in connection
with a dope collar last August.
I think she's solid.
It's gonna pay off.
There's a lot of weapons
coming into town, sir.
- You read about it every day now.
- Is that a fact, Lacey?
Well, it's good work. Go for it.
Go for it, Stephens.
Yes, sir. We'll get 'em.
- He's a good kid.
- Yeah.
Sincere.
What do you two think?
I'm a jerk or what?
I've been riding you people
because I want those guns off the street
as bad as you do.
Now, will you let me get out of here?
May I see you two for a second?
Sure.
What are you doing?
You're the only two who use this place.
Who are we going to walk in on?
All right. What? What?
- Well, I don't want to look at that.
- Turn to page 26.
What, are you broadening your horizons?
"Meet Dirk, the hunk next door"?
- Look at the picture.
- No.
- Oh, my God.
- What?
It's Stephens.
- Look.
- What?
- Well, that man has a mustache.
- It's him.
It's him in a gay magazine.
How many people saw that?
Found it lying face up in the men's room.
And I heard
they found another one over in uniforms.
I just thought
you two would want to know
- all hell is about to break loose.
- Yeah.
(EXCLAIMS)
- What do you mean by that?
- Nothing.
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
All your money in the bag.
(SCREAMS)
(GUN FIRNG)
(SCREAMS)
Sounds to me like it was
the O.K. Corral in there.
- I can't believe this.
- It's a crime to carry an unlicensed...
- It's a crime to protect myself?
- ...handgun in New York.
It's a crime not to let
the place where I work get robbed?
- CAGNEY: Wait a minute.
- Why don't you just let me ask
the questions?
This will go a lot faster, all right.
I've had this pistol for years.
I have a license to prove it.
- Did you ever have the right...
- Sir, this is a license
to keep it in your home.
It's not a permit to carry it on the street.
- You guys believe this?
- This it?
Smith & Wesson, Colt,
and two pieces of garbage.
- What'd you two think, you're in Vietnam?
- Oh, that's funny.
I live there, white meat, you don't.
The guy whose gun blew up,
I heard he might lose an eye.
Good.
- Gotta lose them both.
- I can't believe you said that.
All heart, this one.
You figure these guns might have
something to do with your case?
I don't know. Stephens took
the serial numbers upstairs to check them
with the guns that were stolen
from Kentucky.
Stephens.
- Yeah.
- Thanks.
CAGNEY: All right. Now try to be specific...
You could be in a lot of trouble.
I could just lock you up.
Hey. Listen, man.
I'm not going to be able to pick you
up tonight. Can we meet at the gym?
Look, I don't think I can make it.
Something came up.
- Got a winner, right here.
- Be right back, stay here.
I checked these serial numbers.
Gun number 43229.
Taken from the hot sweaty palms
of one Frederico Uribe.
- Nice one.
- Terrific.
All right, look, you fade.
The two of us will talk to him.
Go on, go. Thank you.
LACEY: Where did you get the gun,
Freddie?
I didn't get it nowhere.
You had it in your possession,
you got it somewhere.
What is this?
How come I'm so popular all of a sudden?
Hey.
- Hey, that scumball didn't croak, did he?
- All of a sudden, you care?
Answer me!
I got it from under the counter, all right?
She's not asking you that.
She's asking you where you bought it!
- Nowhere, it ain't my gun.
- Yes?
It's my boss's gun.
Hey, look, he keeps it under the counter
so we can stop scumballs, all right?
Maybe we oughta run this by the feds?
We don't want to step on anybody's toes.
Well, maybe we ought to
run it by Samuels first.
Hope he had a good lunch.
Petrie, can you take this guy?
Hey, "take this guy"? What are you
talking about? Take me where?
Hey, you got to be kidding me.
Hey, I'm serious. I'm going to get
the ACLU on you two.
- Damn it. I tried to stop that scumball...
- LACEY: Sir.
We got back the rundown
on the serial numbers.
The gun used by that clerk
is part of the Kentucky shipment.
- Found out where he got it?
- It belonged to the store's owner.
Now, if we could find out where he got it,
we could be under the whole thing.
Fine.
- Great, let's get Stephens and get on it.
- No, no. Hold it, hold it a second.
Close the door.
Have you heard about Stephens?
We heard.
Yeah, word's gone out. Everybody
has heard about that photo spread.
Just a matter of time
till they pull his past.
So, whatever you're doing, hurry it up.
Isn't this getting a little out of proportion?
So he did a little modeling, so what?
It's not just a little modeling.
It's a gay magazine.
It's posing in the nude. It's porn.
Sir, Charlie Stephens wasn't on the cover.
I mean somebody went to the newsstand
and flipped through the pages, bought it.
Somebody male.
Do you ever wonder who?
CAGNEY: Has he actually been charged
with anything yet?
We are talking about serious misconduct.
He's not gonna get
the benefit of the doubt.
So, all I'm saying to you two is,
if you can use him, do not waste any time.
Okay?
- Okay.
- Yes, sir.
So get on with it.
I'll have to talk it over, yes.
Give me your number, I'll call you back.
Yeah. Thank you very much.
Listen up, please.
I just got a phone call.
Some guy found out
we made the grand prize drawing.
- He offered to buy our lottery ticket.
- For how much?
$10,000.
Maybe he knows something
we don't know.
Maybe the odds are better than we think.
This guy could work for a syndicate.
They could be buying up dozens
of New York State lottery tickets.
- This guy offered how much?
- $10,000.
- I think we ought to sell.
- I think I have to think it over.
I think we all should.
Let's wait a day or two, discuss it.
- Maybe we'll get a better offer, huh?
- We'll never get a better offer.
How many tickets in the pool?
I don't know.
Somebody ought to check that out.
Yeah. Someone ought to
check out the odds. La Guardia?
LA GUARDIA: I'll do it.
And then we'll have a discussion.
Friday morning, 10:00,
- we'll put it to a vote.
- Yes.
$10,000!
- So what do you think?
- We're not going to talk about it.
Why not?
Because you're going to
try to convince me,
and I don't want to be convinced
until I'm sure what I want to do.
What are you talking about?
The ticket,
we are not going to talk about it.
Fine. I was talking about Stephens.
Oh.
Well, what do you think?
You think he knows?
How can he not?
- You think he's gay?
- It doesn't make any difference.
Well, I didn't ask you
if it made any difference,
I asked you what you thought.
None of my business.
LACEY: Sir, Frederico Uribe has made
a statement that the gun belonged to you.
Watch the glass there, huh?
I don't want no scratch marks on it.
You charging me with something?
Well, we'd appreciate
your cooperation in this.
What we want to know
is where that gun came from.
You're dropping the charges
against Freddie?
We may not be able to ignore
those charges, sir.
He did fire the gun.
What do you expect him to do?
Sit there and get shot?
Freddie is a boy with a future.
And Freddie is the one
who could have had his face blown off
instead of the kid
who was robbing your store.
What kind of world is this, huh?
Where boys like Freddie... Where heroes
have to be made to feel ashamed.
Mr. Enriquez,
we can arrest you for possession
of an illegal handgun,
and we will if you don't tell us
where you got that weapon.
Arrest me, I'll die a martyr.
Look, maybe we can work something out.
We might be able to get some immunity.
I don't know.
Freddie, too?
We'll see.
Hey, we'll see.
Look, I don't know the guy's name,
but I'll show you where he's at.
ENRIQUEZ: That's the guy.
LACEY: The cab driver?
Yeah.
- The one pulling out.
- That's him. He didn't see us, did he?
LACEY: No.
And I have the license plate.
Thank you.
Now, here is our boy. Vincent Scafali.
It's not going to be hard
to make contact with him.
Right time, right place. No sweat.
I'd say the sooner the better.
Any particular reason?
Well, we're trying to work together here,
Charlie, and...
We should say what's on our mind, right?
I'm listening.
There's a magazine going around
the department.
A lot of people have looked at it.
Yeah, it's me. So what?
Look, will you lighten up?
We're on your side.
What side is that?
What's the next question here?
- Am I a fag?
- Hey, now, come on.
We'll forget about it for now.
We'll talk about it later.
I've been not talking about it all day.
I've been getting the looks
and the whispers and the looks away.
Why are you so surprised?
This sort of thing
reflects on the department.
That's the way the brass looks at it.
Check out your options, Charlie.
The thing is not going away.
Thanks, I appreciate the advice.
Until I hear any different,
I've got a job to do. Are you with me?
Are you with me?
Come on, let's figure it out.
STEPHENS: Pull over here.
Hey, baby, yo, over here.
Gee, you kept me waiting half an hour.
- Easy baby, easy. You had a busy day?
- Yeah.
Driver, just drive around the block.
- You're $20 short here.
- Well, I couldn't get to the bank.
You know I don't cut up a gram.
And you know that I'm good for it.
So, come on. Come on.
Today has not exactly been
my day at the beach.
All right. All right.
Being as it's you.
Hey, what are friends for? Here you go.
LACEY: Driver, would you stop here?
- Listen, there's something else.
- Yeah?
Eli, you know, my Eli.
Well, he's in trouble,
and he wants something for protection.
Buy him a dog.
Well, he needs a right-away gun,
and I told him I'd ask you.
How much is he willing to pay?
- I don't know. Fifty, 60 bucks.
- Fifty, 60 bucks.
Okay, okay, I'll see what I can do, all right?
- You keep in touch.
- Yeah.
Well, you know I'll do that.
- Let's go.
- Sure. Hey, could I have one of those?
Thank you.
Well.
He's nothing if he's not honest.
Can't bust him for it. Give him 50 bucks,
he gives you the directions.
Yeah, we gotta find him
in the same place with the gun.
- And up the ante.
- We will. We'll get him.
Wait till I get the pipe back on.
You can wash it off.
- Hey.
- Oh. All right.
For better, for worse.
For richer, for poorer.
Yeah, how about richer?
- We got an offer on the ticket today.
- No kidding, huh? How much?
$10,000, that's $1,666.67.
That's not so bad.
What are you guys gonna do?
Well, we have to vote.
We could really use that $1,600,
you and I, huh?
Yeah.
Hey, listen, if you win the big banana,
how much is that worth? $1 million, right?
It's $160,000 each, yeah.
Long odds, but a hell of a payoff.
Well, we got bills, you know.
We got... Harv Jr.'s orthodontist
is coming around again.
Ever get the feeling
we spend most of our time
making payments
on that guy's second Cadillac?
$1,600 is $1,600.
$160,000 is a new way of life.
Hey, Dirk, there's someone here
you might wanna meet.
Hey.
Yeah, Sid.
Hey, Beck. Beck!
Hey, Isbecki,
what the hell was that all about?
What?
That little dance there
in and out of the john.
What do you think,
I'm gonna hold your hand or something?
Hey.
- What?
- What are you, paranoid or something?
You're scared to be seen with me.
You're afraid people are going to think
you're a fruit.
Hey, you're the one with the problem.
I don't get my jollies flashing other boys.
LA GUARDIA: All right.
What's the matter with you two now?
PETRIE: Victor, what are you doing?
This is crazy. Come on.
- Break it up, now. Come on, now.
- I thought you two were friends.
Hey, you got a problem, man.
You oughta see a shrink.
STEPHENS: Schmuck!
Those pictures were taken five years ago,
before I ever became a cop!
I did it because I needed the money.
I had no idea that they would ever end up
in any kind of a magazine at all.
And for the record, I am not gay.
I was not then, and I am not now.
Samuels, get them out of here.
SAMUELS: Hey,
what's all the commotion here?
All right. Just a little horsing around.
You know, Lieutenant,
when the rat's away, the cats will play.
What are you, Richard Pryor?
How close are you two
to collaring that gun dealer?
CAGNEY: We're getting closer.
Stephens is just...
I don't wanna hear it about Stephens.
You two wanna make that collar,
you better do it yourselves.
What does that mean?
That means that
Stephens is about to become a memory.
IAD just put out papers on him.
They're gonna call him in.
Well, that's to be expected.
That doesn't necessarily mean
he's gonna get canned.
Wake up, will you?
Now, don't push too hard.
We don't wanna scare him off.
No, I gotta take this to the wall.
I may not get another chance here.
You know that.
- If he cuts and runs, so be it.
- I don't know.
We're never gonna bring this guy down
if we don't do it now.
Just be careful.
If you need us, we'll be right here.
You'll be the first to know.
Well, you're not hard to find.
- What've you got, a beef?
- No, no complaints.
Fact is, I could use
some more of the same.
- How many are we talking about?
- Fifty.
Fifty?
SCAFALI: What you gonna do
with that many pieces?
STEPHENS: They're a hot item.
I don't think I need the competition.
Why don't you think of it
as going into a new market?
What are you gonna do with them?
Where they gonna end up?
Hey, does Macy's tell Gimbles?
I need $1,000 upfront.
I'll take the delivery first.
No, I don't deliver.
That's my edge on the game.
Okay, I'll pass.
Wait a second. Wait a second.
Sit down. Sit down.
Sit.
Tell you what.
You be here tomorrow at 3:00.
You bring the money with you.
I'll take you to the warehouse.
Okay.
- He did good.
- Yeah.
Look, you've been suspended.
We're sorry.
Okay.
Lieutenant Samuels really tried for you...
Listen, I talked to Scafali,
I managed to put him off.
The shipment came in, over 100 pieces.
Did you requisition the buy money?
- LACEY: Yeah, but so what?
- Then we got him.
- We don't have anybody.
- I thought you were with me.
Do you have any idea how many
regulations we've been breaking?
So, you're just gonna stand by
and let those guns go out into the street?
Oh, I understand.
You don't wanna work with a fag.
Time come for me to back you up,
I might get all hysterical and...
Oh, don't pull that crud with us.
Come on, we've gone to the wall for you...
How many gays do you think
are on the police department?
I have no idea. Plenty, I'm sure.
- I'm not gay, you know.
- We heard.
- From who?
- From you, in the squad room.
If we make this collar,
nobody's gonna care
how many regulations we broke.
If.
You're asking a lot, Charlie.
- LACEY: You're suspended.
- Up to you.
Either way I'm getting this guy.
Christine, if this thing goes sour,
we could get suspended, too.
Mary Beth, come on.
- What if one of us gets hurt?
- We could always get hurt.
Technically, they could say
it was not in the line of duty.
And then there go
the medical payments, right?
Nobody is going to get hurt.
But what if he hurts someone?
He is suspended now.
He's not even a cop, anymore.
Mary Beth, would you just trust me?
I'd just like to know why Charlie's so hot
to go through with this thing.
Well, he wants to tag the dealer.
- He wants to stop the guns.
- And?
And maybe pull himself out of the line
of departmental fire.
You don't suppose
he's trying to prove something, do you?
I'm Detective Lacey.
We requisitioned $1,000 yesterday.
- Case number 40725.
- Just a sec.
No money.
Well, look, we're in a real rush here.
How fast can we get it?
- Case number 40725, right?
- Right, yeah.
Filing officers, Cagney,
Lacey, Stephens, right?
Officer Stephens has been suspended.
- The last name on there should be Isbecki.
- That's what I thought.
You're gonna need
new paperwork for that.
The Stephens appropriation is void.
You gotta be kidding here.
- Sorry. Out of my hands.
- Forget it.
You here again?
- I got a plan.
- What?
We front the money ourselves.
- Five hundred bucks apiece?
- You got $500.
It's not whether I've got it.
It's whether I wanna keep it.
So we arrest Scafali,
we'll get the money back.
Well, I'm not so sure
that we can arrest Scafali.
Why not?
Because I don't think that
Charlie Stephens is exactly in top form.
Are you gonna start now?
I'm just saying
he's under a lot of pressure, that's all.
He's got something to prove, right?
You're the one
who came up with that one.
Well, maybe his judgment is off.
Well, mine isn't off and neither is yours.
Come on, Mary Beth,
this is the easiest collar we ever made.
Christine, I just don't like to run
into these things the way that you do.
But we're not running in, we're crawling.
I cannot take this money
without talking to Harvey first.
- Can you call him?
- End of discussion.
What are you talking about?
The banks are still open.
I don't want to talk about it.
My lips are sealed.
Don't ask me about it again.
- Oh, would you stop being hysterical?
- Leave it alone. I'll think it over.
Hey, come on,
I'm not making an issue out of money.
If you need it, take it.
Well, I just want you to know
that something could go wrong.
Hey, babe, anything goes wrong,
it's not the money I care about.
What about you?
Not any more dangerous
than it was before.
Hell, 500 bucks isn't much to gamble
to get 100 guns off the street.
Hey, come on.
Is he gonna take his shirt off again?
- Harv.
- What?
They voted to keep the ticket today.
Oh, yeah? You too?
We could have really used the $1,600, huh?
We could use $160,000 even more.
Yeah, I voted to keep the ticket, too.
You did?
Hey, if we win,
maybe we can go to Hawaii, huh?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Maybe I could meet him.
- That'd be nice.
- Nice.
- Harv, don't do that. I hate being...
I hate to be tickled, Harv. I hate it.
It's like...
Honey, I hate this, you know it.
You know I do.
- Just wanted to say good night.
- Good night.
Well, how come you're
all the time staying late?
I'm working.
Catching up, you know how it is.
- You mind if I join you?
- Sure.
Why not?
You're off duty. I'm off duty.
- Go ahead.
- Thank you.
So...
Lieutenant, how's it going?
How's it going?
I'm not too crazy about the place
that I'm living in now.
- You know Thelma and I...
- Yeah, I heard.
Well, maybe if we win the lottery,
I can move.
Maybe I win a lottery,
she's gonna want me to come back home.
Maybe.
Not that she's a gold digger or nothing.
Mind you,
she probably would have been
if she had the imagination.
That's all right, go ahead.
- You always lived alone?
- Yeah, yeah, I like it.
Most of the time, I do.
- What are you gonna do with your money?
- What money?
- The lottery.
- Oh, yeah. I don't know.
I never even really think about it much.
Relax, probably. You know.
Take a cab a couple more times
than I would normally.
Look only on the left-hand side
of the menu if I'm buying myself dinner.
Big dreams.
- I just wanna win.
- Yeah.
I like to win.
I know you do.
- Here's the money.
- Please don't lose it.
STEPHENS: What, are you kidding?
Come on. You've been suspended.
They took away your gun.
I don't want you
going in there with nothing.
No. No.
- How you reading me?
- Reading you.
Hey, we've been down this street
two times already.
The meter ain't running.
What are you looking at?
SCAFALI: I'm just watching what's behind.
So, will you relax?
- You'd better drop over.
- Yeah.
CAGNEY: Get the damn bus out of there.
LACEY: What, do you work for the city,
or what is this?
Where is he? You see him?
I got him. He's on the right, by the corner.
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
What the heck!
Hey, you wanna get away from here?
Give us a break. What are you...
Would you get out of here?
- Hey, buster.
- We're gonna lose him now.
Oh, come on. Oh, give me a break.
Can you believe this?
- Hey, fella, have a heart!
- Nice work.
This is really great work. Thank...
You got any change?
- Nice work.
- Yeah, here.
- Wait a minute.
- What? I'm good for it.
Hey, thank you.
LACEY: Oh, Lord. It's over,
that's all. It's over.
STEPHENS: Where are we going?
SCAFALI: To the theater.
- To the theater?
- Come on, will you? Just come on.
(WOMAN LA UGHING)
(WOMAN SPEAKING SPANISH)
- What's she saying?
- Who knows?
It's the same in every language, man.
Is this a porno house?
SCAFALI: What the hell
did you think it was? Come on.
Wonderful. Wonderful.
A porno house in New York City.
Trust me, she says.
- That you, Vinny?
- SCAFALI: Yeah.
Okay, just checking.
Hey.
Hey, what's the name of this flick anyway?
MAN: Los Amores de Millicent.
Los Amores de Millicent?
- What does that mean?
- How the hell should I know?
Just find a newsstand, will you?
Anywhere.
- Why'd you wanna know that for?
- What?
The name of the movie.
I might wanna come back
and see the movie later.
Where is it?
All right, just cross your fingers
it's an exclusive engagement.
Los Amores... Los... Here it is.
- Oh, no. It's in three different theaters.
- Where?
Well, all right, two of them are uptown,
and one of them is near here. It's the...
- It's the Jewel Box Theater on the deuce.
- Let's go.
There's five in each can.
You get the 10 cans when I get the cash.
Grab this.
You take five cans. I'll grab five.
- Wanna check them all?
- No.
I trust you.
All right. Come on, let's go.
(POLICE SIREN WAILING)
Police!
(PEOPLE CHA TTERING ON SCREEN)
WOMAN: I like to mix it up.
Hey, watch it, buddy.
(SHUSHING)
Hey, what are you doing down there?
Degenerate.
CAGNEY: There he is.
LACEY: Stop running!
- Charlie! Charlie!
- Charlie!
We're here, man, we're here.
You, don't you move!
Don't you move, man. Don't breathe.
Don't you breathe. Turn over.
Turn over on your belly.
Okay. It's okay.
Now get your hand back here.
- Put your head down. Put your head down.
- Give it to me.
- It's over.
- Give me this.
Sign these.
They indicate that you have received
an official reprimand
for allowing a suspended officer
to participate in an arrest.
It will be on your record for a year.
If there are no further charges
of misconduct during this year,
- it will be absolved.
- The department's all heart.
In addition to that,
you will each have
four hours pay withheld.
Sir, what about our $500?
Oh, well, you see Accounting about that.
(EXHALES)
Hell of a collar.
It was Stephens' collar, sir.
He found it. He turned it out.
Yeah, well, the department knows that.
That's why he's only getting the hand-slap.
Six months suspension without pay?
That's a hell of a hand-slap, Lieutenant.
Thanks.
Hello.
- Hey, terrific collar.
- Thanks.
I just come by to pick up
some of my stuff, you know.
- Gonna be out of here for a while.
- I heard.
- Yeah, I'll see you around.
- Listen...
Are you gay or what?
I mean, I'd been remembering some stuff.
Like that time
we were at Alan's Gym together.
- You told me I had a great body.
- Yeah.
You told me I had a great body, too, Vic.
I don't remember that.
I'll see you around.
MALE ANNOUNCER: And now
the moment we've all been waiting for...
Okay. Okay, she's about to draw.
Hey, keep it down over there. Kaufman!
- OFFICER: Hey, I wanna watch, too.
- Shut up!
- I don't think that I can look at this.
- My God, you're pale.
Won't be long now.
Then we'll be riding on easy street.
We won't win. I never win anything.
I think I'm gonna throw up.
I'm not kidding.
MALE ANNOUNCER: The drum is open now.
He rummages around,
takes out a ticket, and the winner is...
What is the matter with you?
The love of money is the root of all evil.
Now pull yourself together.
Christine. You kidding?
(TOILET FLUSHING)
Looking to invest
a little pin money, sweetheart?
Pin this, Mac.
Come on, Mary Beth,
this is the easiest collar we ever made.
Christine, I just don't like to run
into these things the way that you do.
But we're not running in, we're crawling.
I cannot take this money
without talking to Harvey first.
It's a gay magazine.
It's posing in the nude.
Those pictures were taken five years ago,
before I ever became a cop!
Christine, if this thing goes sour,
we could get suspended, too.
Mary Beth, come on.
- What if one of us gets hurt?
- We could always get hurt.
We're here, man, we're here.
You, don't you move!
CARD DEALER: I got your winner here.
Now look, you see how easy that is?
If you want to win, you've got to get in.
If you want to play, you got to pay.
All you got to do is find
a little black queen.
Yes, sir, I got a winner here.
You see how easy that is.
But if you want to play, you got to pay.
You want to win? You got to get in.
She ain't going nowhere. She's right there.
So if you've got a hunch, you better bunch.
Because you cannot accumulate
if you do not speculate.
- There she is, there she is, right there.
- Excuse me.
I'd like to bet here.
Gentlemen, please make room
for the lady.
Looking to invest
a little pin money, sweetheart?
Pin this, Mac.
Fold it up.
LACEY: Chris, take him.
In the truck!
Hey, hey, hey.
Watch the arm. Watch the arm.
Hey, fellow, shut it down, would you, huh?
I'm a cop. I'll give you ID in two minutes.
Just shut it down, please.
- Hey, come on. Take it easy.
- Yuck.
We've got a couple of Al Capones here.
Bunko, assaulting an officer,
resisting arrest.
- Possession of an illegal handgun.
- I never saw it before in my life.
- CAGNEY: Come on, let's go.
- Look, I never saw it before, either.
- Are you all right?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
She took a pretty good
knock out there, sir.
I want you to have an X-ray.
You've got to have an X-ray.
- I don't want any of my detectives...
- I want to get this guy...
- ...walking around hurt.
- I just want to get this guy into Booking.
I'm fine.
Move.
You here again?
Can't stay out of trouble, can you?
I'm gonna give you trouble
tomorrow night, pal.
So, who's ahead
in the racquetball tourney?
Guess.
You could save yourself a lot of
embarrassment and just forfeit right now.
Forfeit this.
Hey, hope I didn't get too rough out there.
No, not at all, Charles.
That's all you came up with,
one Saturday night special?
I thought this guy
was moving them in by the truckload.
What can I tell you?
At least we got something.
Yeah. What I got is a detective
gimping around on a case.
When the DA sees it, he's gonna laugh
in my face, that's what I got.
Come on.
- Be honest. This kid any good or what?
- Yes, sir. He's good.
Been on the job for two weeks,
you got nothing.
Sir, Stephens is terrific out there.
We would have never requested him from
the Anti-Crime Unit if we didn't think so.
I don't know,
these Anti-Crime guys make me nervous.
All the time out in the street,
all the time looking for action.
(SCATTING)
I think they're all a little crazy.
So did you get sprung already?
How's that shoulder?
What shoulder?
I'll take some aspirin, it'll be fine.
All right, what's the next step, team?
Let's line it up.
Okay, our next step is,
our boy here dives back out on the streets,
and we'll see what he comes up with.
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
- I have the new lottery tickets.
- PETRIE: All right.
Feeling lucky.
ISBECKI: Did you buy them
at the candy store?
No, I got them at the liquor store
around the corner.
I told you to buy them at the candy store.
They advanced someone 200 bucks
there last week.
What difference does it make?
We're not going to win anyway.
You're putting out
a negative vibe, La Guardia.
What are you talking about?
We're going to win.
Yeah. So next week,
we'll buy them at the candy store.
- I'll take the first five, if it's all right.
- No!
Three is my lucky number.
I wanted every third one.
- Nobody's going to win.
- Come on, Petrie.
- Can I buy your third one?
- On the phone, Chris. I'm on the phone.
Could I look at the numbers, please,
before I choose?
- Now, Paul, please, I just want to...
- It doesn't matter.
He didn't buy them at the candy store.
We could have 65.
- And this one.
- Will you? Come on.
Just give me five here.
La Guardia, just cut out the third one
on every card for me and I...
You have five.
Mary Beth, you have five, and I have five.
Would you give...
- I'm telling you it doesn't matter, okay?
- Forget it.
I just wanted to look
at all the numbers first.
If it actually mattered,
I'd say something to help you out.
(MUTTERING)
Come on.
(MUTTERING)
(GROANING)
I told him to buy at the candy store.
Where you going?
- To buy some gum.
- Look at your tickets first.
Patience, my friend.
I'll look when I feel the time is right.
What the hell is this? He picks them first,
and he waits till the last to look at them.
Yes! Yes! Yes!
- What?
- Are you all right?
- What happened?
- We've got... We won 1,000 bucks.
$1,000? What's six into $1,000?
About $160 apiece.
I told you not to rush me.
I'm sorry. You were right.
You were absolutely right.
Thank you.
- Where is it? Where is it? Where is it?
- There.
Oh, we won!
See, I told you not to rush me, didn't I?
It'll come to no good.
- Hi, Mommy.
- LACEY: Hiya.
- Did you do your homework, yet?
- I don't have any.
- What's in the bag?
- Dinner. Where's your brother?
He has intramurals.
What's intramurals?
- Hey.
- Hiya, babe.
- What you got?
- Chili.
Oh, good,
because it's always better the second day.
I got artichokes. I got real butter.
I got fillet mignon
cut to order, 1.5 inches thick.
I got a little bottle of
Petite something or other from California,
imported directly for you.
What the heck did you do?
Hit the numbers?
I hate artichokes.
How do you know
you hate artichokes when...
You never tried them, see...
If you do them real salty...
- The lottery pool.
- Yeah. $166.67.
- And a chance at the grand prize.
- What's that?
BOTH: $1 million!
One and six zeroes, 1,000,000.
Now go in the other room, write it down.
One and six zeroes.
Honey, honey. You're gonna
get a hernia here. Don't lift...
I should get lucky more often, huh?
(CAGNEY MOANING)
Oh, yeah.
How much more do you want me
to work on this shoulder, dearie?
$166 worth.
Yeah.
This better be good. This better be good.
Because they got the turkey plate special
over at Clearing's today.
It's good. It's good.
Stephens has turned
the beginnings of a lead.
We want to follow up on it.
- Well?
- Tell him.
Okay, I've been working on a waitress
over at the Coco Club.
There's a history of guns
coming out of that place, sir.
And drugs and hot goods, all kinds of stuff.
You're going to buy me lunch.
She overheard a couple of clowns talking
about a load of Saturday night specials.
We think that they might be
part of a shipment
that was ripped off a couple of weeks ago
from a manufacturer down in Kentucky.
SAMUELS: You been working her long?
Six, seven months now. Yeah.
I met her in connection
with a dope collar last August.
I think she's solid.
It's gonna pay off.
There's a lot of weapons
coming into town, sir.
- You read about it every day now.
- Is that a fact, Lacey?
Well, it's good work. Go for it.
Go for it, Stephens.
Yes, sir. We'll get 'em.
- He's a good kid.
- Yeah.
Sincere.
What do you two think?
I'm a jerk or what?
I've been riding you people
because I want those guns off the street
as bad as you do.
Now, will you let me get out of here?
May I see you two for a second?
Sure.
What are you doing?
You're the only two who use this place.
Who are we going to walk in on?
All right. What? What?
- Well, I don't want to look at that.
- Turn to page 26.
What, are you broadening your horizons?
"Meet Dirk, the hunk next door"?
- Look at the picture.
- No.
- Oh, my God.
- What?
It's Stephens.
- Look.
- What?
- Well, that man has a mustache.
- It's him.
It's him in a gay magazine.
How many people saw that?
Found it lying face up in the men's room.
And I heard
they found another one over in uniforms.
I just thought
you two would want to know
- all hell is about to break loose.
- Yeah.
(EXCLAIMS)
- What do you mean by that?
- Nothing.
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
All your money in the bag.
(SCREAMS)
(GUN FIRNG)
(SCREAMS)
Sounds to me like it was
the O.K. Corral in there.
- I can't believe this.
- It's a crime to carry an unlicensed...
- It's a crime to protect myself?
- ...handgun in New York.
It's a crime not to let
the place where I work get robbed?
- CAGNEY: Wait a minute.
- Why don't you just let me ask
the questions?
This will go a lot faster, all right.
I've had this pistol for years.
I have a license to prove it.
- Did you ever have the right...
- Sir, this is a license
to keep it in your home.
It's not a permit to carry it on the street.
- You guys believe this?
- This it?
Smith & Wesson, Colt,
and two pieces of garbage.
- What'd you two think, you're in Vietnam?
- Oh, that's funny.
I live there, white meat, you don't.
The guy whose gun blew up,
I heard he might lose an eye.
Good.
- Gotta lose them both.
- I can't believe you said that.
All heart, this one.
You figure these guns might have
something to do with your case?
I don't know. Stephens took
the serial numbers upstairs to check them
with the guns that were stolen
from Kentucky.
Stephens.
- Yeah.
- Thanks.
CAGNEY: All right. Now try to be specific...
You could be in a lot of trouble.
I could just lock you up.
Hey. Listen, man.
I'm not going to be able to pick you
up tonight. Can we meet at the gym?
Look, I don't think I can make it.
Something came up.
- Got a winner, right here.
- Be right back, stay here.
I checked these serial numbers.
Gun number 43229.
Taken from the hot sweaty palms
of one Frederico Uribe.
- Nice one.
- Terrific.
All right, look, you fade.
The two of us will talk to him.
Go on, go. Thank you.
LACEY: Where did you get the gun,
Freddie?
I didn't get it nowhere.
You had it in your possession,
you got it somewhere.
What is this?
How come I'm so popular all of a sudden?
Hey.
- Hey, that scumball didn't croak, did he?
- All of a sudden, you care?
Answer me!
I got it from under the counter, all right?
She's not asking you that.
She's asking you where you bought it!
- Nowhere, it ain't my gun.
- Yes?
It's my boss's gun.
Hey, look, he keeps it under the counter
so we can stop scumballs, all right?
Maybe we oughta run this by the feds?
We don't want to step on anybody's toes.
Well, maybe we ought to
run it by Samuels first.
Hope he had a good lunch.
Petrie, can you take this guy?
Hey, "take this guy"? What are you
talking about? Take me where?
Hey, you got to be kidding me.
Hey, I'm serious. I'm going to get
the ACLU on you two.
- Damn it. I tried to stop that scumball...
- LACEY: Sir.
We got back the rundown
on the serial numbers.
The gun used by that clerk
is part of the Kentucky shipment.
- Found out where he got it?
- It belonged to the store's owner.
Now, if we could find out where he got it,
we could be under the whole thing.
Fine.
- Great, let's get Stephens and get on it.
- No, no. Hold it, hold it a second.
Close the door.
Have you heard about Stephens?
We heard.
Yeah, word's gone out. Everybody
has heard about that photo spread.
Just a matter of time
till they pull his past.
So, whatever you're doing, hurry it up.
Isn't this getting a little out of proportion?
So he did a little modeling, so what?
It's not just a little modeling.
It's a gay magazine.
It's posing in the nude. It's porn.
Sir, Charlie Stephens wasn't on the cover.
I mean somebody went to the newsstand
and flipped through the pages, bought it.
Somebody male.
Do you ever wonder who?
CAGNEY: Has he actually been charged
with anything yet?
We are talking about serious misconduct.
He's not gonna get
the benefit of the doubt.
So, all I'm saying to you two is,
if you can use him, do not waste any time.
Okay?
- Okay.
- Yes, sir.
So get on with it.
I'll have to talk it over, yes.
Give me your number, I'll call you back.
Yeah. Thank you very much.
Listen up, please.
I just got a phone call.
Some guy found out
we made the grand prize drawing.
- He offered to buy our lottery ticket.
- For how much?
$10,000.
Maybe he knows something
we don't know.
Maybe the odds are better than we think.
This guy could work for a syndicate.
They could be buying up dozens
of New York State lottery tickets.
- This guy offered how much?
- $10,000.
- I think we ought to sell.
- I think I have to think it over.
I think we all should.
Let's wait a day or two, discuss it.
- Maybe we'll get a better offer, huh?
- We'll never get a better offer.
How many tickets in the pool?
I don't know.
Somebody ought to check that out.
Yeah. Someone ought to
check out the odds. La Guardia?
LA GUARDIA: I'll do it.
And then we'll have a discussion.
Friday morning, 10:00,
- we'll put it to a vote.
- Yes.
$10,000!
- So what do you think?
- We're not going to talk about it.
Why not?
Because you're going to
try to convince me,
and I don't want to be convinced
until I'm sure what I want to do.
What are you talking about?
The ticket,
we are not going to talk about it.
Fine. I was talking about Stephens.
Oh.
Well, what do you think?
You think he knows?
How can he not?
- You think he's gay?
- It doesn't make any difference.
Well, I didn't ask you
if it made any difference,
I asked you what you thought.
None of my business.
LACEY: Sir, Frederico Uribe has made
a statement that the gun belonged to you.
Watch the glass there, huh?
I don't want no scratch marks on it.
You charging me with something?
Well, we'd appreciate
your cooperation in this.
What we want to know
is where that gun came from.
You're dropping the charges
against Freddie?
We may not be able to ignore
those charges, sir.
He did fire the gun.
What do you expect him to do?
Sit there and get shot?
Freddie is a boy with a future.
And Freddie is the one
who could have had his face blown off
instead of the kid
who was robbing your store.
What kind of world is this, huh?
Where boys like Freddie... Where heroes
have to be made to feel ashamed.
Mr. Enriquez,
we can arrest you for possession
of an illegal handgun,
and we will if you don't tell us
where you got that weapon.
Arrest me, I'll die a martyr.
Look, maybe we can work something out.
We might be able to get some immunity.
I don't know.
Freddie, too?
We'll see.
Hey, we'll see.
Look, I don't know the guy's name,
but I'll show you where he's at.
ENRIQUEZ: That's the guy.
LACEY: The cab driver?
Yeah.
- The one pulling out.
- That's him. He didn't see us, did he?
LACEY: No.
And I have the license plate.
Thank you.
Now, here is our boy. Vincent Scafali.
It's not going to be hard
to make contact with him.
Right time, right place. No sweat.
I'd say the sooner the better.
Any particular reason?
Well, we're trying to work together here,
Charlie, and...
We should say what's on our mind, right?
I'm listening.
There's a magazine going around
the department.
A lot of people have looked at it.
Yeah, it's me. So what?
Look, will you lighten up?
We're on your side.
What side is that?
What's the next question here?
- Am I a fag?
- Hey, now, come on.
We'll forget about it for now.
We'll talk about it later.
I've been not talking about it all day.
I've been getting the looks
and the whispers and the looks away.
Why are you so surprised?
This sort of thing
reflects on the department.
That's the way the brass looks at it.
Check out your options, Charlie.
The thing is not going away.
Thanks, I appreciate the advice.
Until I hear any different,
I've got a job to do. Are you with me?
Are you with me?
Come on, let's figure it out.
STEPHENS: Pull over here.
Hey, baby, yo, over here.
Gee, you kept me waiting half an hour.
- Easy baby, easy. You had a busy day?
- Yeah.
Driver, just drive around the block.
- You're $20 short here.
- Well, I couldn't get to the bank.
You know I don't cut up a gram.
And you know that I'm good for it.
So, come on. Come on.
Today has not exactly been
my day at the beach.
All right. All right.
Being as it's you.
Hey, what are friends for? Here you go.
LACEY: Driver, would you stop here?
- Listen, there's something else.
- Yeah?
Eli, you know, my Eli.
Well, he's in trouble,
and he wants something for protection.
Buy him a dog.
Well, he needs a right-away gun,
and I told him I'd ask you.
How much is he willing to pay?
- I don't know. Fifty, 60 bucks.
- Fifty, 60 bucks.
Okay, okay, I'll see what I can do, all right?
- You keep in touch.
- Yeah.
Well, you know I'll do that.
- Let's go.
- Sure. Hey, could I have one of those?
Thank you.
Well.
He's nothing if he's not honest.
Can't bust him for it. Give him 50 bucks,
he gives you the directions.
Yeah, we gotta find him
in the same place with the gun.
- And up the ante.
- We will. We'll get him.
Wait till I get the pipe back on.
You can wash it off.
- Hey.
- Oh. All right.
For better, for worse.
For richer, for poorer.
Yeah, how about richer?
- We got an offer on the ticket today.
- No kidding, huh? How much?
$10,000, that's $1,666.67.
That's not so bad.
What are you guys gonna do?
Well, we have to vote.
We could really use that $1,600,
you and I, huh?
Yeah.
Hey, listen, if you win the big banana,
how much is that worth? $1 million, right?
It's $160,000 each, yeah.
Long odds, but a hell of a payoff.
Well, we got bills, you know.
We got... Harv Jr.'s orthodontist
is coming around again.
Ever get the feeling
we spend most of our time
making payments
on that guy's second Cadillac?
$1,600 is $1,600.
$160,000 is a new way of life.
Hey, Dirk, there's someone here
you might wanna meet.
Hey.
Yeah, Sid.
Hey, Beck. Beck!
Hey, Isbecki,
what the hell was that all about?
What?
That little dance there
in and out of the john.
What do you think,
I'm gonna hold your hand or something?
Hey.
- What?
- What are you, paranoid or something?
You're scared to be seen with me.
You're afraid people are going to think
you're a fruit.
Hey, you're the one with the problem.
I don't get my jollies flashing other boys.
LA GUARDIA: All right.
What's the matter with you two now?
PETRIE: Victor, what are you doing?
This is crazy. Come on.
- Break it up, now. Come on, now.
- I thought you two were friends.
Hey, you got a problem, man.
You oughta see a shrink.
STEPHENS: Schmuck!
Those pictures were taken five years ago,
before I ever became a cop!
I did it because I needed the money.
I had no idea that they would ever end up
in any kind of a magazine at all.
And for the record, I am not gay.
I was not then, and I am not now.
Samuels, get them out of here.
SAMUELS: Hey,
what's all the commotion here?
All right. Just a little horsing around.
You know, Lieutenant,
when the rat's away, the cats will play.
What are you, Richard Pryor?
How close are you two
to collaring that gun dealer?
CAGNEY: We're getting closer.
Stephens is just...
I don't wanna hear it about Stephens.
You two wanna make that collar,
you better do it yourselves.
What does that mean?
That means that
Stephens is about to become a memory.
IAD just put out papers on him.
They're gonna call him in.
Well, that's to be expected.
That doesn't necessarily mean
he's gonna get canned.
Wake up, will you?
Now, don't push too hard.
We don't wanna scare him off.
No, I gotta take this to the wall.
I may not get another chance here.
You know that.
- If he cuts and runs, so be it.
- I don't know.
We're never gonna bring this guy down
if we don't do it now.
Just be careful.
If you need us, we'll be right here.
You'll be the first to know.
Well, you're not hard to find.
- What've you got, a beef?
- No, no complaints.
Fact is, I could use
some more of the same.
- How many are we talking about?
- Fifty.
Fifty?
SCAFALI: What you gonna do
with that many pieces?
STEPHENS: They're a hot item.
I don't think I need the competition.
Why don't you think of it
as going into a new market?
What are you gonna do with them?
Where they gonna end up?
Hey, does Macy's tell Gimbles?
I need $1,000 upfront.
I'll take the delivery first.
No, I don't deliver.
That's my edge on the game.
Okay, I'll pass.
Wait a second. Wait a second.
Sit down. Sit down.
Sit.
Tell you what.
You be here tomorrow at 3:00.
You bring the money with you.
I'll take you to the warehouse.
Okay.
- He did good.
- Yeah.
Look, you've been suspended.
We're sorry.
Okay.
Lieutenant Samuels really tried for you...
Listen, I talked to Scafali,
I managed to put him off.
The shipment came in, over 100 pieces.
Did you requisition the buy money?
- LACEY: Yeah, but so what?
- Then we got him.
- We don't have anybody.
- I thought you were with me.
Do you have any idea how many
regulations we've been breaking?
So, you're just gonna stand by
and let those guns go out into the street?
Oh, I understand.
You don't wanna work with a fag.
Time come for me to back you up,
I might get all hysterical and...
Oh, don't pull that crud with us.
Come on, we've gone to the wall for you...
How many gays do you think
are on the police department?
I have no idea. Plenty, I'm sure.
- I'm not gay, you know.
- We heard.
- From who?
- From you, in the squad room.
If we make this collar,
nobody's gonna care
how many regulations we broke.
If.
You're asking a lot, Charlie.
- LACEY: You're suspended.
- Up to you.
Either way I'm getting this guy.
Christine, if this thing goes sour,
we could get suspended, too.
Mary Beth, come on.
- What if one of us gets hurt?
- We could always get hurt.
Technically, they could say
it was not in the line of duty.
And then there go
the medical payments, right?
Nobody is going to get hurt.
But what if he hurts someone?
He is suspended now.
He's not even a cop, anymore.
Mary Beth, would you just trust me?
I'd just like to know why Charlie's so hot
to go through with this thing.
Well, he wants to tag the dealer.
- He wants to stop the guns.
- And?
And maybe pull himself out of the line
of departmental fire.
You don't suppose
he's trying to prove something, do you?
I'm Detective Lacey.
We requisitioned $1,000 yesterday.
- Case number 40725.
- Just a sec.
No money.
Well, look, we're in a real rush here.
How fast can we get it?
- Case number 40725, right?
- Right, yeah.
Filing officers, Cagney,
Lacey, Stephens, right?
Officer Stephens has been suspended.
- The last name on there should be Isbecki.
- That's what I thought.
You're gonna need
new paperwork for that.
The Stephens appropriation is void.
You gotta be kidding here.
- Sorry. Out of my hands.
- Forget it.
You here again?
- I got a plan.
- What?
We front the money ourselves.
- Five hundred bucks apiece?
- You got $500.
It's not whether I've got it.
It's whether I wanna keep it.
So we arrest Scafali,
we'll get the money back.
Well, I'm not so sure
that we can arrest Scafali.
Why not?
Because I don't think that
Charlie Stephens is exactly in top form.
Are you gonna start now?
I'm just saying
he's under a lot of pressure, that's all.
He's got something to prove, right?
You're the one
who came up with that one.
Well, maybe his judgment is off.
Well, mine isn't off and neither is yours.
Come on, Mary Beth,
this is the easiest collar we ever made.
Christine, I just don't like to run
into these things the way that you do.
But we're not running in, we're crawling.
I cannot take this money
without talking to Harvey first.
- Can you call him?
- End of discussion.
What are you talking about?
The banks are still open.
I don't want to talk about it.
My lips are sealed.
Don't ask me about it again.
- Oh, would you stop being hysterical?
- Leave it alone. I'll think it over.
Hey, come on,
I'm not making an issue out of money.
If you need it, take it.
Well, I just want you to know
that something could go wrong.
Hey, babe, anything goes wrong,
it's not the money I care about.
What about you?
Not any more dangerous
than it was before.
Hell, 500 bucks isn't much to gamble
to get 100 guns off the street.
Hey, come on.
Is he gonna take his shirt off again?
- Harv.
- What?
They voted to keep the ticket today.
Oh, yeah? You too?
We could have really used the $1,600, huh?
We could use $160,000 even more.
Yeah, I voted to keep the ticket, too.
You did?
Hey, if we win,
maybe we can go to Hawaii, huh?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Maybe I could meet him.
- That'd be nice.
- Nice.
- Harv, don't do that. I hate being...
I hate to be tickled, Harv. I hate it.
It's like...
Honey, I hate this, you know it.
You know I do.
- Just wanted to say good night.
- Good night.
Well, how come you're
all the time staying late?
I'm working.
Catching up, you know how it is.
- You mind if I join you?
- Sure.
Why not?
You're off duty. I'm off duty.
- Go ahead.
- Thank you.
So...
Lieutenant, how's it going?
How's it going?
I'm not too crazy about the place
that I'm living in now.
- You know Thelma and I...
- Yeah, I heard.
Well, maybe if we win the lottery,
I can move.
Maybe I win a lottery,
she's gonna want me to come back home.
Maybe.
Not that she's a gold digger or nothing.
Mind you,
she probably would have been
if she had the imagination.
That's all right, go ahead.
- You always lived alone?
- Yeah, yeah, I like it.
Most of the time, I do.
- What are you gonna do with your money?
- What money?
- The lottery.
- Oh, yeah. I don't know.
I never even really think about it much.
Relax, probably. You know.
Take a cab a couple more times
than I would normally.
Look only on the left-hand side
of the menu if I'm buying myself dinner.
Big dreams.
- I just wanna win.
- Yeah.
I like to win.
I know you do.
- Here's the money.
- Please don't lose it.
STEPHENS: What, are you kidding?
Come on. You've been suspended.
They took away your gun.
I don't want you
going in there with nothing.
No. No.
- How you reading me?
- Reading you.
Hey, we've been down this street
two times already.
The meter ain't running.
What are you looking at?
SCAFALI: I'm just watching what's behind.
So, will you relax?
- You'd better drop over.
- Yeah.
CAGNEY: Get the damn bus out of there.
LACEY: What, do you work for the city,
or what is this?
Where is he? You see him?
I got him. He's on the right, by the corner.
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
What the heck!
Hey, you wanna get away from here?
Give us a break. What are you...
Would you get out of here?
- Hey, buster.
- We're gonna lose him now.
Oh, come on. Oh, give me a break.
Can you believe this?
- Hey, fella, have a heart!
- Nice work.
This is really great work. Thank...
You got any change?
- Nice work.
- Yeah, here.
- Wait a minute.
- What? I'm good for it.
Hey, thank you.
LACEY: Oh, Lord. It's over,
that's all. It's over.
STEPHENS: Where are we going?
SCAFALI: To the theater.
- To the theater?
- Come on, will you? Just come on.
(WOMAN LA UGHING)
(WOMAN SPEAKING SPANISH)
- What's she saying?
- Who knows?
It's the same in every language, man.
Is this a porno house?
SCAFALI: What the hell
did you think it was? Come on.
Wonderful. Wonderful.
A porno house in New York City.
Trust me, she says.
- That you, Vinny?
- SCAFALI: Yeah.
Okay, just checking.
Hey.
Hey, what's the name of this flick anyway?
MAN: Los Amores de Millicent.
Los Amores de Millicent?
- What does that mean?
- How the hell should I know?
Just find a newsstand, will you?
Anywhere.
- Why'd you wanna know that for?
- What?
The name of the movie.
I might wanna come back
and see the movie later.
Where is it?
All right, just cross your fingers
it's an exclusive engagement.
Los Amores... Los... Here it is.
- Oh, no. It's in three different theaters.
- Where?
Well, all right, two of them are uptown,
and one of them is near here. It's the...
- It's the Jewel Box Theater on the deuce.
- Let's go.
There's five in each can.
You get the 10 cans when I get the cash.
Grab this.
You take five cans. I'll grab five.
- Wanna check them all?
- No.
I trust you.
All right. Come on, let's go.
(POLICE SIREN WAILING)
Police!
(PEOPLE CHA TTERING ON SCREEN)
WOMAN: I like to mix it up.
Hey, watch it, buddy.
(SHUSHING)
Hey, what are you doing down there?
Degenerate.
CAGNEY: There he is.
LACEY: Stop running!
- Charlie! Charlie!
- Charlie!
We're here, man, we're here.
You, don't you move!
Don't you move, man. Don't breathe.
Don't you breathe. Turn over.
Turn over on your belly.
Okay. It's okay.
Now get your hand back here.
- Put your head down. Put your head down.
- Give it to me.
- It's over.
- Give me this.
Sign these.
They indicate that you have received
an official reprimand
for allowing a suspended officer
to participate in an arrest.
It will be on your record for a year.
If there are no further charges
of misconduct during this year,
- it will be absolved.
- The department's all heart.
In addition to that,
you will each have
four hours pay withheld.
Sir, what about our $500?
Oh, well, you see Accounting about that.
(EXHALES)
Hell of a collar.
It was Stephens' collar, sir.
He found it. He turned it out.
Yeah, well, the department knows that.
That's why he's only getting the hand-slap.
Six months suspension without pay?
That's a hell of a hand-slap, Lieutenant.
Thanks.
Hello.
- Hey, terrific collar.
- Thanks.
I just come by to pick up
some of my stuff, you know.
- Gonna be out of here for a while.
- I heard.
- Yeah, I'll see you around.
- Listen...
Are you gay or what?
I mean, I'd been remembering some stuff.
Like that time
we were at Alan's Gym together.
- You told me I had a great body.
- Yeah.
You told me I had a great body, too, Vic.
I don't remember that.
I'll see you around.
MALE ANNOUNCER: And now
the moment we've all been waiting for...
Okay. Okay, she's about to draw.
Hey, keep it down over there. Kaufman!
- OFFICER: Hey, I wanna watch, too.
- Shut up!
- I don't think that I can look at this.
- My God, you're pale.
Won't be long now.
Then we'll be riding on easy street.
We won't win. I never win anything.
I think I'm gonna throw up.
I'm not kidding.
MALE ANNOUNCER: The drum is open now.
He rummages around,
takes out a ticket, and the winner is...
What is the matter with you?
The love of money is the root of all evil.
Now pull yourself together.
Christine. You kidding?
(TOILET FLUSHING)