CHiPs (1977–1983): Season 2, Episode 20 - Quarantine - full transcript

Look, uh, I missed part
of your conversation.

What part did you miss?

Everything after beunos días.

I told the driver that I was just giving
him a warning about his turn signals.

He insisted on explaining. He
said he's taking it to have them fixed.

It looked like you guys
were gonna go to blows.

Spanish people
tend to be animated.

They use gestures for
emphasis, punctuations.

Some gestures have
meanings by themselves.

I wonder if Berlitz offers a course
in, uh, gestures. A refresher course.

Oh, yeah, like, uh:



Uh-huh.

Vroom, vroom, vroom. Eh? Vroom.

Come on, Lori. You've
got us late already.

Slow down. I'm a drama
student, not a track star.

How could it take you one hour to
answer 10 simple true-or-false questions?

- I was prepared for multiple choice.
- Ooh...

Come on.

One of these days I'm gonna...

One of these...

Now, just get us to the
theater in time for the rehearsal.

- I will, I will.
- Okay.

- Can't think about anything else.
- Huh.

Aah! Forget about the
rehearsal, think about your driving.

Uh, you know how you
tend to startle easily?



Ha-ha. Yeah.

Well, it's kind of important
that you don't get jumpy now.

- Why?
- There's a kid in the back seat with a bomb.

- What does he want?
- I'll ask.

- Bakersfield.
- Whatever you say.

- Better head for Bakersfield.
- See if he knows which freeway's best.

- Oh. This has got my mind off the rehearsal.
- Mine too.

Look, there are two CHP
motorcycles on our tail.

Is that good?

- A hostage situation.
- Kid in the back seat's in control.

- Carjacking.
- I'll call it in, you hold the profile.

- What's he doing?
- He's just a kid, Lori, and I think he's sick.

Oh, no.

10-4.

Support units are on the way.

He wants to go to
Bakersfield. Which way?

- Bakersfield?
- Bakersfield.

Follow us.

- See you tomorrow, sarge.
- Hey, wait...

- Oh, I got time off coming.
- Wait a minute, Grossman.

- I think you owe the department time.
- Right here, sarge.

- Just relax a little.
- Supposed to be under control.

- Right here, let's go.
- What's going on here?

I caught them siphoning
gas out of a moped.

- A moped?
- We weren't going very far.

You know, I don't get it. He was
talking like a blue streak in the car.

Yeah, well, why did
you bring him here, huh?

I was taking them downtown to be
booked when my vehicle broke down.

- What did he write?
- "Why won't anybody listen to me?"

All right, all right. Everybody
out of the office, come on.

See that? He's a born leader.
You might make sergeant someday.

- Let's go. Come on.
- Out, come on.

How much longer can
we keep driving like this?

- How much gas have you got left?
- Over half a tank.

- I get over 27 miles to a gallon.
- Oh, that's great.

This is Bakersfield?

Couldn't have
said it better myself.

Listen, I'm gonna
cover the front.

Hey, relax, all right?

Hey, sarge!

It's all right.

Come on, now, take it easy.

Come on, now, it's okay. Look,
we're gonna try to help you.

Hey, take it easy, would you?

We're not going to hurt you.

Come on, just relax, son.

Easy.

Clear the area, we
have an emergency.

Here he comes.

Is it the bomb? We
wanted to see what...

Please, for your safety,
get this car out of here.

I hope the kid doesn't get in
trouble. He was kind of nice.

Easy.

It's okay.

Son, we don't wanna hurt you.

If you've got some sort of
problem, we'll help you work it out.

Medics are on the way.

The rest of the building's been evacuated.
I called the sheriff's bomb squad.

- It's okay.
- You stay here, kid. I'll get us an attorney.

It's okay, it's okay.

Grossman, if you don't
watch those prisoners...

I'm gonna consider an act
of violence on your person.

I don't think he understands
what we're saying.

Yeah, maybe. He hasn't said
a word since he's been in here.

He's got a right
to remain silent.

I don't think he can stand
on his legs very much longer.

Mr. Harris, I've been in touch with
the mayor personally on your case...

- Now's the time to lose your voice.
- I'm speaking to a client.

- Off the phone.
- I'll call you back.

I would like it to be a matter of record
that my communication has been restricted.

Like your freedom of movement.
It's called being in custody.

May I ask what I'm being charged with? You
are familiar with the rights of citizens?

Look, this is no time for games.

If that kid pops that bomb out
there, we're all former citizens.

Imminent danger does not reduce
the significance of the individual.

It's precisely during those
times of stress, ladies and...

I liked you better
when you wrote notes.

I tell you, that
routine's getting to him.

Jon.

This way, doctor.

- What's the problem?
- Sick kid. We don't know what he's got.

I think he's got a bomb.

Leave it alone. That's
for the bomb squad.

- Why don't you get a cushion for the bomb?
- I repeat, don't touch it.

We may have something
worse here than a ticking bomb.

I've got the feeling I'm not gonna
like what you're gonna say next, right?

This boy has symptoms of any
number of epidemic diseases.

Seaman's clothing, no labels,
obviously Asian. Know who he is?

Any idea where he came from?

Harbor Freeway, northbound.

Can this corridor be closed off?

Good. Seal the
entrance at the other end.

Is there any other way
out of this immediate area?

Well, the, uh, bomb might just blow
a doorway through the wall for you.

- Restricting contamination comes first.
- Sounds like a quarantine.

Right. This area is
under quarantine...

until we can determine which
disease we're dealing with.

I was about to leave,
so I guess I'll be going.

- Uh, you will be staying.
- Well...

Nobody's leaving, nothing.

- I got this appointment.
- Uh, what you got is this quarantine.

- Careful.
- Watch out for that bomb.

Be careful, okay?

How did he get here?

Commandeered a car with a
pipe bomb. We led him here.

Hey, the girls in the car
might know something.

- Hey, sarge.
- Yeah.

- I could go ask the girls.
- Look, Grossman, live with it.

We'll send in everything
you need. Cots, food...

Cots? I've gotta be
out of here at 5:00.

- It could be two weeks.
- Two weeks?

- Epidemiology is similar to scrub typhus.
- Except for the subcutaneous hemorrhaging.

Missed that.

Come on.

Doctor.

This may be a deadly
epidemic situation.

The boy's clothing suggests that
he's recently arrived in the country.

Illegally, no doubt.

And that opens up
endless possibilities.

We must know where he's
been in the last few weeks.

Well, how's that gonna help?

Many diseases are
endemic to specific areas.

Uh, valley fever to California's central
valleys, typhus and cholera to parts of Asia.

Don't forget the Philly Killer.
- Back.

Legionnaire's disease
is another possibility.

Knowing where he's been will
give us an idea of what to look for.

If you should find someone...

anyone who has had any contact
with that boy, notify me immediately.

And, uh, may I remind you...

the security of this quarantine
is your responsibility.

Doctor, I categorically
assure you, I understand.

Sarge, I hate to
be a nag, but...

Grossman, where's
with the bomb squad?

I guess they have to clear their
action with the Health Department.

Look, I want that thing
neutralized right away.

Yes, sir.

Sindy, uh, see if these
doors can be locked.

Look, uh, we can block off some of these
corridors by moving some filing cabinets in.

All right. SINDY: Okay.

Baker, come here
and give me a hand.

Martin Huntley, please,
with the bomb squad.

That's right, bomb squad.

Martin.

Yeah, this is Artie Grossman.

Grossman. At Central.

Right. Listen, Martin,
I called you about...

Martin, hold on one second.

Just cancel the call, Martin.
There's been some mistake.

Harlan, can't you read? There's
a quarantine sign in the hall.

Posted way above eye level.
The law prescribes eye level.

- I've already had the measles anyway.
- No, Harlan.

- Mumps?
- Uh-uh.

Chickenpox?

I've had all my shots.

You're in the lifeboat, Harlan.

- Too late, huh?
- Right.

- How did you know that wasn't a bomb?
- Bomb?

Hey, sarge, look at this.

Which disease could it be, huh?

Bubonic plague.

Cholera, typhoid.

All right.

How will it hit us?
Give me the worst.

Initially, a loss of appetite.

Then, a ravenous
hunger for spicy foods.

Gradually, an aversion to
fruit salad, chicken soup, Jell-O.

Those are the
symptoms of the disease?

No. A reaction to the county
hospital food we'll be getting.

What kind of attorney
are you supposed to be?

Civil attorney, actually. I specialize
in corporate business, tax shelters...

Tax shelters? Don't move.

I had an appointment today
at 5:30 with my taxman.

I'm out of luck now.

But...

here's my basic problem.

These are my
itemized deductions.

Question. Can I deduct wear and tear
on my shoes worn to and from work?

Ah... Ah-ha.

Mm. Ah...

Hmm.

Um, Artie, do you realize who
you're asking tax advice from?

Yeah, and he found
a $200 deduction.

I don't get the explanation,
but it looks good.

Um...

- When you get the details of that deduct...
- Yeah, I'll let you know.

Hey, where do you
think you're going?

Hey, counselor, tell them
I gotta go to the bathroom.

- My client...
- I heard him.

Okay. But hurry back.

And remember, there's
more to this than escaping.

You're both potential
plague-carriers.

If I don't get to the
bathroom, I'm a potential...

All right, all right, go.

Now, about my
tax situation, sir.

Please, you'll have to
make an appointment.

Okay. Thanks,
doc. Keep in touch.

Well, the boy's still in a coma.

They can't begin treatment
until they identify the disease.

They said it would be a lot easier if
we could find out where he came from.

We may not be
in bad shape at all.

The photograph.
Notice the family.

Notice the tractor-trailer rig.

Now, the boy could be
connected either with the family...

or he could be connected
with the tractor-trailer rig.

And not only did he use that
phony bomb as a defense...

he used it as a hiding
place for his valuables.

And what were those valuables? A
little bit of money and a photograph.

The vital clue is
the photograph.

Two weeks. This
could take two weeks.

Hey, sarge, look. Everyone carries
around pictures of someone they love.

- Everyone.
- I never carried a picture in my life.

Hey, get back in there
where you belong, huh?

You know, it's logical the people in the
photo could tell us something about the kid.

As for the truck, the DMV could list
some license numbers that could fit.

We can read all but two of them.

You'll be making a lot of phone
calls, checking out possibles.

But there might be
something there. Run with it.

Excuse me.

Sergeant Getraer.

Uh, nothing on the kid yet,
captain. We're clutching at straws.

Yeah.

Did you hear that?

What we call a systemized
search, he calls clutching at straws.

Nobody's always wrong.

Those people posing in front of the
restaurant, maybe that's a connection.

I can read something
on that building though.

- Yeah, there's four letters.
- It says "food."

Sorry.

I've been meaning to ask,
how come you're on the inside...

and Ponch is on the outside?

I got to the back
door before he did.

I don't feel comfortable
with this honor system.

Good. That means
you have a conscience.

I don't understand this
quarantine deal either.

Oh, that's like medical
maximum security.

Max security?

Boy, I'd be something if I
busted out of here, wouldn't I?

Hey, what are you
two cooking up?

I'm counseling my client. It's
a privileged communication.

You know, who would have figured it? Two
and a half million trucks in California.

Yeah, but the computer's
cut it down to a few thousand.

I think we better stick to
our original hunch. The photo.

Yep.

It's all we've got.

- That's a felony.
- It's an adjustment. We're all out of change.

Look, you'll never
get it open that way.

Oh, well, I won't, huh?

- No, you won't.
- Okay.

- Look, you have a coat hanger?
- A what?

- A coat hanger. A coat hanger?
- Yeah.

- What are you gonna do, pick the lock?
- What do you think, I'm an amateur?

Hold that. Got it hard?

Wanna move the machine out a
little, Harlan, please? Thank you.

- How far?
- Just keep going.

Now, you wanna tilt it a little? A
little more, a little more. A little more.

Okay, now tilt it towards
me. You got it? More.

More. Over, over, over. Okay.

Okay. A little more.

Okay.

When I count to three
give the machine one kick.

- Okay?
- Mm-hm.

One, two, three.

Oh, Wiley's just helping
Harlan adjust the machine.

Yeah, nobody has any change.

Well, uh, have him adjust a Choco-Nuts
bar and some Cheezies for me, huh, Harlan?

You know, the doctor says we're
gonna be here for about two weeks.

I mean, why so long?

Well, with a disease
which can't be identified...

Excuse me.
- -a tissue sample...

is cultured in a petri dish...

away from a victim's antibodies.

See, some bacteria
grow at such a slow rate...

that other faster-growing organisms
around them tend to obscure them.

It takes two weeks to
develop an identifiable culture...

with nearly every epi...

Excuse me.

It wasn't a yes or no question.

Okay, thank you.

Ah.

That, uh, guy you brought in with
Wiley, his name is probably Bill Conner.

He's from the Westwood
Veterans' Hospital.

Psychiatric section, right?

Mm-hm.

He's walking around with
several distinct personalities...

each one independent
of the other.

Well, why don't you explain
how that works, Grossie?

No.

Well, the strange part about
it is, they want him back.

He keeps up the
patients' morale.

I see how he could relate
to a variety of people.

So there's this naked
biker club, see, ha-ha-ha...

dancing around at the side of the
road, and this sheriff's sedan pulls up.

I don't mean to interrupt...

but, uh, there are some people
who are worried about you, Bill.

Bill?

Mm-hm.

You're Bill Conner.

Your friends at the
V.A. hospital called.

Dr. Ansgar said he'll be very
happy when you come back.

Usually when this
happens, I'm in trouble.

- Am I in trouble?
- No. No, I don't think so, Bill.

Wiley.

- Ah, Grossman.
- Come on.

In here.

Grossman.

Oh, I'd jump at the
chance, sarge, but I couldn't.

- Obviously.
- I'm claustrophobic.

Look, you take over here, Jon.
I'll alert the rest of the building.

Okay, give me a boost.

- I'll get you a flashlight, Sindy.
- Great.

- You sure?
- Oh, come on, we're wasting time.

All right.

Three. Oops.

Here you go, Sindy.
You got it? SINDY: Got it.

Thanks, guys.

- Yeah, Ponch.
- I'll check the roof.

- Make sure he doesn't get out that way.
- Might alert people in other offices.

Right, will do. Oh, hey, by the
way, you having fun in there?

You don't know
what you're missing.

Okay.

Not a sound.

Hey, the food's here.

Bill. Bill.

- You talking to me?
- Yeah.

Lefty.

Ah.

Lefty.

You know, copper, I feel
responsible for the kid making a break.

Uh, well...

why don't you do
something for him, Lefty?

Yeah, he'll listen to you.

You know, I think a few
well-chosen words from you...

the kid would turn
himself around.

I'll do it.

Good boy.

Ooh.

There are vegetables in these
containers I've never even seen before.

Mm, hospital dieticians
disguise things no one likes.

Undercover vegetables?

It's sort of like a freeway.

Restricted one-way channel, off-ramps,
fleeing citizen, pursuing CHP officer.

Hey, Wiley, there's no way out.

You're in a one-way duct.

You lose again.

You're supposed to
say, "You're under arrest."

Well, you've been under arrest.
Now you're a recaptured escapee.

- I was looking for some fresh air.
- Really? Follow me.

That way.

Come on.

Hey, Conner.

You see how I shook
them up? I had them going.

Yeah, kid, you're
a real Houdini.

What did you get out of it?

I got satisfaction.

Oh. Try to spend it.

Look, it was something.
What am I supposed to do?

Look, there's only one
way to beat the system.

Yeah?

You gotta pretend to go along
with it. Fake it, you understand?

Big deal. I thought I was
gonna learn something.

Hey, if you don't have
the guts for it, kid, say so.

- Hey, I got all kind of guts.
- Then pay attention.

You gotta pretend morning, noon
and night that you're shaping up.

When you're alone, even.

You gotta fake it
and keep faking it.

Come to think of it,
you may have to stop...

and remind yourself once in
a while that you're still a crook.

How long do I have
to keep this up?

Till it becomes a habit.

Till every cop in this town
starts believing you're Tom Mix.

Who's Tom Mix?

Never mind. Forget
it. A good guy.

What if I start
believing this myself?

Sorry, kid. That's a
chance you'll have to take.

Are you sure this is okay? I
don't wanna get into more trouble.

We're gonna pay for all this stuff.
You're not gonna get in trouble.

You're good with your hands.
You'd be good with motorcycles.

It takes a touch
just like you've got.

If I could just make a
contribution to society.

There's money in there.

Somebody ought to take
charge of it before it disappears.

They put the mashed
potatoes in gelatin molds.

Sunburst and floral patterns.

Hmm.

I'll have cream of
mushroom and bean.

And chicken noodle.

You know, a man wouldn't have
his family riding with him in his tractor.

Well, wait a minute.
Maybe it's not his truck.

Yeah, but, I mean,
Bakersfield, food...

Baker...

- Bakersfield truck stop.
- Bakersfield truck stop.

Yeah, that might be it.

Now, the CHP office in Bakersfield
would have a rundown on the truck stops.

- Get on it, Jon.
- Yeah, thanks. Excuse me.

- Because of the size of the jet?
- Good, yeah. You pick this up fast.

He could tell you a lot of things, too,
when he goes back to being a biker.

Oh...

Boy, our relief shift gets
relieved in a few minutes.

We got a psychological phenomenon
here. But it doesn't impress you at all.

No. Call me if he
does someone short.

Yes, sir, about that building,
uh, that I was talking to you about.

The building has a wide entrance
with "food" spelled out on it.

Uh-huh.

Yeah, well, do you
know the owner?

Okay, thanks. You
bet. I'll let you know.

- It's all yours.
- Right.

- Hello?
- Hello, Mr. Nesset?

I'm officer Sindy Cahill from
the Los Angeles CHP Central.

We're trying to establish the
identity of a boy you may know.

- He's about 14 years old.
- That's Lee. Is he all right?

Well, he has a fever, but
his condition is stable now.

Well, where's the hospital?
I'll leave right away.

We understand how you must feel,
but the doctors need information...

in order to diagnose the fever
properly. Where does Lee come from?

An orphanage in Pusan, Korea.

Look, we're adopting him, and, uh,
he was worried something was wrong.

It was taking so long.

He wrote to say he was gonna
visit his grandfather near Seoul...

and get over here on his own.

Well, call Dr. David Bosca.

Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, I got it. Right.

- Don't worry, I'll drive safely.
- Bye.

Where is Seoul, exactly?

On the 38th parallel. It's what
divides North and South Korea.

It's where most of the
Korean War was fought.

Ha-ha.

Boring. You know I let
you win that, don't you?

No, you didn't. I
won fair and square.

I just spoke with the doctor. The
boy's fine. He has Manchurian fever.

It can only be contracted
in three places in the world.

And one of those places is
just north of Seoul, Korea.

Now, it takes an intermediate
carrier or vector to spread...

and humans can't
act as carriers.

- So we can leave?
- No, we can leave.

The owner of the car Conner
was driving gave it to him to repair.

The moped owner
refuses to press charges.

- No holds on Wiley.
- Heh.

Harlan.

- Thanks a lot.
- No, keep it for a while.

Just drop it by next time you're around.
You might have some questions, huh?

Oh. You know, I was just
telling Ponch yesterday...

- these were the guys we could live with.
- Mm, we did.

- Oh, did we?
- I know.

- Jon.
- Yeah.

You got two days off.

I'll see you and Poncherello
day after tomorrow, huh?

All right. If I wake up by then.

Hey, partner, how does it
feel being locked out, huh?

- Come on, tell me about it.
- Later, huh? What happened to you?

Oh, well, as you know, I was on
the roof, remember? It's dirty up there.

Come on.

Look at me.

Hey.

Oh. Hi, remember us?
I'm Lori, she's Crystal.

- Of course.
- How you doing?

Uh, we were wondering, is
the little boy gonna be all right?

- Uh, yeah, he's gonna be fine.
- Did the bomb go off?

- No.
- Oh, that's neat.

- Well, it really wasn't a bomb.
- Well, what was it?

That's a long story, all right?

Yeah, and we have a couple days
off, so, uh, we could tell you about it...

if you have an evening free.

Super.

Well, why don't you come to the
show, and we'll have dinner after?

- Come to the show?
- We're both drama students at the college.

- We're both in a play.
- You'll love it.

- Sounds great, Jon.
- Yeah. What's the name of the play?

- Panic in the Streets.
- It's about a typhoid epidemic.