C.H.U.E.C.O. (2023–…): Season 1, Episode 11 - Episode #1.11 - full transcript
♪ Chueco ♪
(theme music plays)
"SAUSAGE-WICH WITH CHUECO-CHURRI"
And I got out of the taxi in Argentina.
But in my dream,
it was a place I didn't know,
and nothing happened...
So I started walking and saw the shops,
and there was nothing weird.
I looked up, and nothing, nothing.
Did you lose something, Martin?
My interest.
That's rude, guys.
I always listen to you
when you're talking.
We haven't talked in half an hour.
-Ha! Do you have anything to say?
-Yes.
-About my dream?
-No!
Anything new with you?
Yes, we need money.
You were in Argentina,
nothing happened, great story.
What you give us per week isn't enough.
We need more.
Seventeen percent more, free of taxes.
I need a new effects pedal for my guitar.
Don't you think you play
with enough defects as it is?
(chuckles)
I need to update the Mortal Battle
Intruder Cosmic Revenge of the Universe.
Eh?
I have version 3.24
and now there's a 3.25!
And what's the difference?
You can change the color
of the jacket sleeves.
Essential, right?
I just want tickets for the Royal Ballet.
No! No, no, no, no.
You ask for more and more,
and that's not okay.
It's important we talk
about money in this house,
because money is an element
you need to learn to manage.
Learn from Chueco.
He lives in the jungle with no money,
and it's better.
Yes, but you can't climb trees.
You'd be lion's dessert in five minutes.
This reminds me of another dream.
I was walking in the jungle...
(all groan)
Here's the juice.
(all cheering)
-Hurray!
-Yummy, yummy.
Hey, I'm talking here.
Too bad. I'm here now, Chuequito.
Let's try this...
Mmm! Amanda, please, this is so tender.
I don't like it.
You haven't even tried it.
I don't have to.
The plating is so poor,
and it's not original at all.
I think you go straight
to the elimination round.
Your only idea of cooking
is poking a stick in an anthill.
Yes, my favorite dish. Delicious!
Your food lacks soul.
Why doesn't he cook?
We'll see how many spoons of soul
he adds to the dishes.
Do you want to bet
I cook way better than you?
Sure.
I was talking to the kids
about the dark side of money.
Something that will never happen
at Juan Gustozzi's house
is betting.
-A thousand pesos.
-Deal!
(yawning)
I need a shower.
-(metal clanking)
-(gasps)
Wake up!
I can't start my morning like this.
I know what I'll cook today
to win Amanda's bet.
An Argentinian barbecue.
And my day is getting better.
Tell me more.
If I say Argentinian,
who am I talking about?
My great friend, Juan "Che" Gustozzi.
I can't start a fire.
How come you can't start a fire
if you're Argentinian?
It's as if you didn't like tango.
I don't like tango.
It's as if you told me
you didn't like soccer.
What?
But... You're a disgrace for Argentina!
I'm sorry, country, I'm sorry.
(humming)
(scat singing)
And this...
Mmm!
It's missing something.
Toothpaste! Yes.
This will serve a double purpose.
It provides seasoning
and prevents cavities.
You're a genius, Chueco.
How beautiful!
(chuckles) Bravo, geniuses.
You look like two Homo sapiens
discovering fire.
-And you look like...
-What?
You... you... look like...
I'm terrible with comparisons.
-JUAN: Chueco!
-CHUECO: I quit.
JUAN: I've got a solution.
We'd bet 1,000, now we'll bet 2,000.
Close it at three.
Done.
What's going on here?
What do you have there?
I found the solution
to our problems online.
A bottle, newspaper,
you put it there, take out the bottle,
we light a match...
Voilà!
That's ridiculous.
Anyone can post anything online.
There's fire.
Bravo, Juancito!
♪ Here's the salt ♪
What's wrong? That smell?
Chueco...
-Four thousand.
-Deal.
Let me see the recipes. Ouch! It's hot.
Sure, typical of cheap brands.
(Delfina sniffs) What's that?
That's gross, Dad.
Don't say that to your dad.
What matters is what's on the inside.
Delfi, go to the kitchen
and make some salad.
-Why me?
-It's tradition.
It's like asking why Santa Claus
wears a jacket on Christmas
and baby Jesus only a diaper.
I'm not doing anything.
Me either.
The bet was that you would prepare
the food, Chueco.
You know what? I don't care.
I can handle everything by myself.
Juancito, the salad.
Okay, okay, okay.
Concentration, patience, and sensitivity.
Those are the virtues of a good cook.
If you pay attention,
you feel it in your skin.
You feel it!
I feel a smell of charred tire.
It's burning! It's burning, it's burning.
Do something!
Water! Water, water...
I want to show you
the future of Argentinian cuisine.
"Sausage-wich with Chueco-churri."
The future of cuisine is a hot dog?
That's right, a sausage.
A sausage sandwich.
And? And?
Mmm! (chuckles)
Delicious.
The only good thing is the sauce.
It's got something like...
It reminds me of something.
So? Who won the bet? Who won? Who won?
What? Are you all crazy?
And the sausage-wich?
And the Chueco-churri?
Chueco! Be a good loser.
How can I be a good loser
if I didn't lose?
Amanda won, pay up.
Chueco makes a fuss, Dad will pay.
-Thank you, Juan.
-The hero.
I'm a little short. There, 1,000 pesos.
-But it's 4,000.
-Yes.
You and I are having a chat.
-Do you want me to make something quick?
-Yes!
(in-game sounds playing over console)
Chueco, Chueco, Chueco!
You'll never guess
what happened at school.
Your school blew up?
No...
-Even better!
-What?
Your sausage-wich was terrible,
so I hid mine in my bag.
I go to school, open it,
one of my mates sees it,
takes it, and tries it.
Oh, no! Hospital. Food poisoning.
Did he have his stomach pumped?
What happened?
On the contrary.
Chueco-churri is the most delicious thing
he's ever tasted.
I told you so!
And he bought it.
What? With money?
As if it was a trade
for an object or service?
Just like that.
And he said if I brought more
in the afternoon,
he and his friends would buy them.
(chuckles)
My sausage-wiches are great!
Let's see if Amanda can sell her food. No...
Amanda cooks and that's it.
She cooks because she's being paid,
but she doesn't sell.
She gets paid, totally different.
What are you doing?
-Huh?
-Is everything okay?
Yes, sure,
everything is absolutely wonderful.
-And that?
-Synthetic fur.
I bought it with your money.
Furry. You want to look like me.
(Amanda scoffs)
If I wanted to look like you,
I would have bought it
dirty, ugly, and half-price.
Ah!
Excuse me, I have to go tidy up
and clean the mess you left.
(sniffs) What's that smell?
Have you been cooking?
No, no, no.
A meteorite just fell.
It must be that, excuse me.
It doesn't smell like meteorite.
Forty for you, forty for me.
(gasps)
It's the first time I've sold something.
Forty in a day? Unbelievable.
My friends asked me to bring
more yesterday, go figure.
We said we wouldn't.
Sure, sure. I told my friends
it was just today.
-Stop it, don't insist.
-I didn't say anything.
Okay, fine.
But, for the record, it's against my will.
And mine too.
-Last one.
-Done.
(Chueco chuckles)
Last what?
Is there anything we need to know?
If we tell you
a way we found to make money,
will you help us get rid
of Juan and Amanda?
(relaxing music plays)
Okay, here we go.
How are babies made?
Well...
-When two people love each other...
-Wait.
I haven't finished.
What's the meaning of life?
Does power corrupt people?
Is jealousy the end of love?
Is progress destroying the planet?
Sweet or savory?
What comes after death?
Voilà!
You look super cute!
Really?
You think so?
This is the Amanda that was asleep,
but she's awake now.
Can you hear that?
It's your heart talking.
No, it's arrhythmia.
I have to see the heart doctor.
(stammering)
Sweet.
And?
And savory.
Look at me, and Sofía is coming.
-S-Sofía?
-Yes, your dad invited her.
But I left the door open.
The door open?
(humming)
Chueco. Chueco.
Delfina is trying to tell us something.
Maybe she wants a sausage-wich?
I don't think so.
She's pointing at the door.
She wants to eat a sausage-wich
outside, that's obvious.
Outdoors, with a sausage-wich, a great...
(gasps)
(both screaming)
-Sofi, are you feeling better?
-Yes.
-I remember.
-What?
The chimp. I saw the chimp.
Yes, Chueco, he's here.
No, no, I saw him
cooking and talking... there!
Cooking and talking?
No, Vicente was there.
Do you want a sausage-wich
with Chueco-churri?
No, no, no.
I saw him, it was the chimp.
He was cooking and talking, there...
Sofi, Sofi, my children are here.
Stop it. Breathe.
We calm down.
Chueco seems like a person.
His face makes you think he can talk.
Vicente is wearing that jacket
and he has a little chimp face, right?
You mixed up the images,
in a process called...
Agnosia.
Let's have some cheese and ham
and drink some wine.
Forget about it!
(grunts)
Sofi has just left.
-We were saved by a hair.
-No.
No, we weren't.
Do you see what you did? For some money.
What would have happened
if Sofía found out Chueco can talk?
-Look.
-What? What's this?
So you don't say I'm a bad loser.
Because I'm a very good loser.
If you make a contest of the best losers,
I'll win because I'll lose.
No laughter.
Okay, Chueco, I take it.
Anything to say, you three?
Sorry, Dad.
Sorry, Juan.
It's not about saying sorry,
it's about understanding
you did something wrong.
Is that clear?
Yes, Dad.
Yes, Juan.
Okay.
To show I forgive you...
Thank you, Juan, I'll go book the tickets.
Go.
What do I do with the rest?
That's the question.
(Juan clears throat)
Who needs a pedal?
-Okay.
-Thanks, Dad.
And let's see, the most difficult one.
Okay, for your...
For your...
Mortal Battle Intruder Cosmic Revenge
of the Universe Forever?
You can keep some.
I mean, for the toothpaste.
-Toothpaste for what?
-You'll see.
I hope you understood.
And no more Chueco-churri, sausage-wich...
I don't want to hear it ever again.
Okay? Let's relax.
Dinner is ready!
Yes! I'm hungry!
Let's all go have dinner.
With this, I'm going to open
my own chain of sausage-wiches...
♪ Chueco ♪
(theme music plays)
Wait, wait! Hey, hey, hey.
Delicious empanadas,
empana-Chueco Gustozzi!
(drumbeat)
Well, well...
-(glass shatters)
-No!
So, what happened?
(theme music plays)
Translated by: Ianina Antonetti
(theme music plays)
"SAUSAGE-WICH WITH CHUECO-CHURRI"
And I got out of the taxi in Argentina.
But in my dream,
it was a place I didn't know,
and nothing happened...
So I started walking and saw the shops,
and there was nothing weird.
I looked up, and nothing, nothing.
Did you lose something, Martin?
My interest.
That's rude, guys.
I always listen to you
when you're talking.
We haven't talked in half an hour.
-Ha! Do you have anything to say?
-Yes.
-About my dream?
-No!
Anything new with you?
Yes, we need money.
You were in Argentina,
nothing happened, great story.
What you give us per week isn't enough.
We need more.
Seventeen percent more, free of taxes.
I need a new effects pedal for my guitar.
Don't you think you play
with enough defects as it is?
(chuckles)
I need to update the Mortal Battle
Intruder Cosmic Revenge of the Universe.
Eh?
I have version 3.24
and now there's a 3.25!
And what's the difference?
You can change the color
of the jacket sleeves.
Essential, right?
I just want tickets for the Royal Ballet.
No! No, no, no, no.
You ask for more and more,
and that's not okay.
It's important we talk
about money in this house,
because money is an element
you need to learn to manage.
Learn from Chueco.
He lives in the jungle with no money,
and it's better.
Yes, but you can't climb trees.
You'd be lion's dessert in five minutes.
This reminds me of another dream.
I was walking in the jungle...
(all groan)
Here's the juice.
(all cheering)
-Hurray!
-Yummy, yummy.
Hey, I'm talking here.
Too bad. I'm here now, Chuequito.
Let's try this...
Mmm! Amanda, please, this is so tender.
I don't like it.
You haven't even tried it.
I don't have to.
The plating is so poor,
and it's not original at all.
I think you go straight
to the elimination round.
Your only idea of cooking
is poking a stick in an anthill.
Yes, my favorite dish. Delicious!
Your food lacks soul.
Why doesn't he cook?
We'll see how many spoons of soul
he adds to the dishes.
Do you want to bet
I cook way better than you?
Sure.
I was talking to the kids
about the dark side of money.
Something that will never happen
at Juan Gustozzi's house
is betting.
-A thousand pesos.
-Deal!
(yawning)
I need a shower.
-(metal clanking)
-(gasps)
Wake up!
I can't start my morning like this.
I know what I'll cook today
to win Amanda's bet.
An Argentinian barbecue.
And my day is getting better.
Tell me more.
If I say Argentinian,
who am I talking about?
My great friend, Juan "Che" Gustozzi.
I can't start a fire.
How come you can't start a fire
if you're Argentinian?
It's as if you didn't like tango.
I don't like tango.
It's as if you told me
you didn't like soccer.
What?
But... You're a disgrace for Argentina!
I'm sorry, country, I'm sorry.
(humming)
(scat singing)
And this...
Mmm!
It's missing something.
Toothpaste! Yes.
This will serve a double purpose.
It provides seasoning
and prevents cavities.
You're a genius, Chueco.
How beautiful!
(chuckles) Bravo, geniuses.
You look like two Homo sapiens
discovering fire.
-And you look like...
-What?
You... you... look like...
I'm terrible with comparisons.
-JUAN: Chueco!
-CHUECO: I quit.
JUAN: I've got a solution.
We'd bet 1,000, now we'll bet 2,000.
Close it at three.
Done.
What's going on here?
What do you have there?
I found the solution
to our problems online.
A bottle, newspaper,
you put it there, take out the bottle,
we light a match...
Voilà!
That's ridiculous.
Anyone can post anything online.
There's fire.
Bravo, Juancito!
♪ Here's the salt ♪
What's wrong? That smell?
Chueco...
-Four thousand.
-Deal.
Let me see the recipes. Ouch! It's hot.
Sure, typical of cheap brands.
(Delfina sniffs) What's that?
That's gross, Dad.
Don't say that to your dad.
What matters is what's on the inside.
Delfi, go to the kitchen
and make some salad.
-Why me?
-It's tradition.
It's like asking why Santa Claus
wears a jacket on Christmas
and baby Jesus only a diaper.
I'm not doing anything.
Me either.
The bet was that you would prepare
the food, Chueco.
You know what? I don't care.
I can handle everything by myself.
Juancito, the salad.
Okay, okay, okay.
Concentration, patience, and sensitivity.
Those are the virtues of a good cook.
If you pay attention,
you feel it in your skin.
You feel it!
I feel a smell of charred tire.
It's burning! It's burning, it's burning.
Do something!
Water! Water, water...
I want to show you
the future of Argentinian cuisine.
"Sausage-wich with Chueco-churri."
The future of cuisine is a hot dog?
That's right, a sausage.
A sausage sandwich.
And? And?
Mmm! (chuckles)
Delicious.
The only good thing is the sauce.
It's got something like...
It reminds me of something.
So? Who won the bet? Who won? Who won?
What? Are you all crazy?
And the sausage-wich?
And the Chueco-churri?
Chueco! Be a good loser.
How can I be a good loser
if I didn't lose?
Amanda won, pay up.
Chueco makes a fuss, Dad will pay.
-Thank you, Juan.
-The hero.
I'm a little short. There, 1,000 pesos.
-But it's 4,000.
-Yes.
You and I are having a chat.
-Do you want me to make something quick?
-Yes!
(in-game sounds playing over console)
Chueco, Chueco, Chueco!
You'll never guess
what happened at school.
Your school blew up?
No...
-Even better!
-What?
Your sausage-wich was terrible,
so I hid mine in my bag.
I go to school, open it,
one of my mates sees it,
takes it, and tries it.
Oh, no! Hospital. Food poisoning.
Did he have his stomach pumped?
What happened?
On the contrary.
Chueco-churri is the most delicious thing
he's ever tasted.
I told you so!
And he bought it.
What? With money?
As if it was a trade
for an object or service?
Just like that.
And he said if I brought more
in the afternoon,
he and his friends would buy them.
(chuckles)
My sausage-wiches are great!
Let's see if Amanda can sell her food. No...
Amanda cooks and that's it.
She cooks because she's being paid,
but she doesn't sell.
She gets paid, totally different.
What are you doing?
-Huh?
-Is everything okay?
Yes, sure,
everything is absolutely wonderful.
-And that?
-Synthetic fur.
I bought it with your money.
Furry. You want to look like me.
(Amanda scoffs)
If I wanted to look like you,
I would have bought it
dirty, ugly, and half-price.
Ah!
Excuse me, I have to go tidy up
and clean the mess you left.
(sniffs) What's that smell?
Have you been cooking?
No, no, no.
A meteorite just fell.
It must be that, excuse me.
It doesn't smell like meteorite.
Forty for you, forty for me.
(gasps)
It's the first time I've sold something.
Forty in a day? Unbelievable.
My friends asked me to bring
more yesterday, go figure.
We said we wouldn't.
Sure, sure. I told my friends
it was just today.
-Stop it, don't insist.
-I didn't say anything.
Okay, fine.
But, for the record, it's against my will.
And mine too.
-Last one.
-Done.
(Chueco chuckles)
Last what?
Is there anything we need to know?
If we tell you
a way we found to make money,
will you help us get rid
of Juan and Amanda?
(relaxing music plays)
Okay, here we go.
How are babies made?
Well...
-When two people love each other...
-Wait.
I haven't finished.
What's the meaning of life?
Does power corrupt people?
Is jealousy the end of love?
Is progress destroying the planet?
Sweet or savory?
What comes after death?
Voilà!
You look super cute!
Really?
You think so?
This is the Amanda that was asleep,
but she's awake now.
Can you hear that?
It's your heart talking.
No, it's arrhythmia.
I have to see the heart doctor.
(stammering)
Sweet.
And?
And savory.
Look at me, and Sofía is coming.
-S-Sofía?
-Yes, your dad invited her.
But I left the door open.
The door open?
(humming)
Chueco. Chueco.
Delfina is trying to tell us something.
Maybe she wants a sausage-wich?
I don't think so.
She's pointing at the door.
She wants to eat a sausage-wich
outside, that's obvious.
Outdoors, with a sausage-wich, a great...
(gasps)
(both screaming)
-Sofi, are you feeling better?
-Yes.
-I remember.
-What?
The chimp. I saw the chimp.
Yes, Chueco, he's here.
No, no, I saw him
cooking and talking... there!
Cooking and talking?
No, Vicente was there.
Do you want a sausage-wich
with Chueco-churri?
No, no, no.
I saw him, it was the chimp.
He was cooking and talking, there...
Sofi, Sofi, my children are here.
Stop it. Breathe.
We calm down.
Chueco seems like a person.
His face makes you think he can talk.
Vicente is wearing that jacket
and he has a little chimp face, right?
You mixed up the images,
in a process called...
Agnosia.
Let's have some cheese and ham
and drink some wine.
Forget about it!
(grunts)
Sofi has just left.
-We were saved by a hair.
-No.
No, we weren't.
Do you see what you did? For some money.
What would have happened
if Sofía found out Chueco can talk?
-Look.
-What? What's this?
So you don't say I'm a bad loser.
Because I'm a very good loser.
If you make a contest of the best losers,
I'll win because I'll lose.
No laughter.
Okay, Chueco, I take it.
Anything to say, you three?
Sorry, Dad.
Sorry, Juan.
It's not about saying sorry,
it's about understanding
you did something wrong.
Is that clear?
Yes, Dad.
Yes, Juan.
Okay.
To show I forgive you...
Thank you, Juan, I'll go book the tickets.
Go.
What do I do with the rest?
That's the question.
(Juan clears throat)
Who needs a pedal?
-Okay.
-Thanks, Dad.
And let's see, the most difficult one.
Okay, for your...
For your...
Mortal Battle Intruder Cosmic Revenge
of the Universe Forever?
You can keep some.
I mean, for the toothpaste.
-Toothpaste for what?
-You'll see.
I hope you understood.
And no more Chueco-churri, sausage-wich...
I don't want to hear it ever again.
Okay? Let's relax.
Dinner is ready!
Yes! I'm hungry!
Let's all go have dinner.
With this, I'm going to open
my own chain of sausage-wiches...
♪ Chueco ♪
(theme music plays)
Wait, wait! Hey, hey, hey.
Delicious empanadas,
empana-Chueco Gustozzi!
(drumbeat)
Well, well...
-(glass shatters)
-No!
So, what happened?
(theme music plays)
Translated by: Ianina Antonetti