Bunheads (2012–2013): Season 1, Episode 2 - For Fanny - full transcript

No! The audition for "Chicago"!

10:00 sharp.!

- I can't believe it.
- I'm finally gonna get to really dance again.

No. She's not right.

- Marry me.
- Oh, Hubbell. No.

Hubbell: I live in this beautiful town
called Paradise.

It's right on the coast.

- Mom.
- Yes. Mom.

Wait, you live with your
mother like a serial killer?

I know exactly what you want.

You want to live an unexpected life.



- And I intend to give you exactly that.
- Wow.

This won't last. She's a Vegas girl.
Hubbell will bore her.

Michelle: She has a dance studio
in the back.

Her whole life is here.
You didn't tell me any of that.

- So we heard you're a dancer.
- I trained at A.B.T.

- Do you love him?
- I think I could fall in love with him.

- Truly, what's the matter?
- Hubbell.

We went driving

looking for the two of you.

It just came out of nowhere.

I'm so sorry.

♪ Imagine no one knows

♪ seeing what they can't see ♪

♪ projector writes the epitaph ♪



♪ bigger than TV

♪ flowers up

♪ everything but not enough ♪

♪ flowers up

♪ everything but not enough ♪

♪ LA LA LA LA

♪ LA LA LA LA LA LA

♪ LA LA LA LA

♪ LA LA LA LA LA LA

♪ LA LA LA LA

♪ LA LA LA LA LA LA

♪ LA LA LA LA

♪ LA LA LA LA LA LA

♪ LA LA LA LA.

( Theme music playing )

Bunheads 1x02 - For Fanny
Original air date June 18, 2012

Sasha: I don't know.

Either path is fraught with peril.

I know that if I ask for a car

for my birthday, I'll get it.

- How do you know?
- I know.

I walked in on a really weird
fight they were having

involving the guy who did our
landscaping and a fondue pot.

- Weird.
- So weird.

Anyhow, the minute they saw me
they totally clammed up.

Which translates to busted,

which translates to guilt,

which translates to Beamer.

However, I know that if I ask them

for the car and then I receive said car

I'm then indebted to them for the car,

which means the next time
one of them asks,

"does this outfit make me look fat"?

I'm gonna have to look.

I don't know. How bad is the bus?

Are you even listening to me?

Car, birthday, fondue pot,

am I fat, quandary.

- What are you doing?
- Reading the paper.

- Who does that?
- I'm going to see my grandpa tonight

and he likes me to read the paper to him.

So read it to him then.

I always pre-read it

and circle the articles I think he'll like

because time is an issue
at his age and he gets really upset

if he falls asleep before
I get to Gail Collins.

The class is out there, ladies.

From our ballet teacher.

Anything involving bats, helmets, rackets,

goal lines, shin guards,
personal fouls or high fives

could cause injury and
jeopardize our dance careers.

- Basically anything that happens out there
is out. - Plus I have cramps.

Why don't you just use an iPad?

Tried to. He couldn't
grasp the concept of it.

He just got angry and thought
I was making everything up.

Ugh, the old.

Promise you'll put a pillow over my face

- when I turn 60?
- Will do.

- Did you hear?
- Hear what?

Ginny Thompson! Oh, jeez.

- The announcement.
- Oh, you mean the one

that went "blarsh ment
hucckles flaus ushconment"?

- Yes, that's the one.
- Then yes, we heard it.

Want to know what it said?

Something to do with pink slime?

Hubbell was in a car accident last night.

- Madame Fanny's Hubbell?
- Yep.

- Bad?
- Yep.

- And?
- And... he's...

What, he's what?

- You know.
- I don't know.

- I don't know what that look means.
- Melanie!

- I don't know what that look means either.
- Think.

Focus. Follow the information

to its obvious conclusion.

Hubbell, accident, two weird looks?

Oh.

Wow.

Wow.

- I need a tent.
- You...

I've called three different tent
companies, but they're not open yet.

You'd think there'd be
one 24-hour tent company

somewhere in the world
if for no other reason,

just for novelty's sake.

What do you need a tent for?

For the memorial.

The...

I don't do funerals.

There's no celebration, no ode to life.

Life is everything.
And life goes on, you know.

Buddhists believe
that everyone comes back.

Doesn't that feat alone
deserve a really great party?

Of course it does.

It's going to be a traditional
Buddhist ceremony.

Dignified, spiritual,

not sappy.

We'll need candles and incense,

and a beautiful Book for people
to write their thoughts in.

I think it's going to rain tomorrow,

so I'll have to have it on Sunday,

though I wonder if
there's a religious conflict

in having it on a Sunday. Oh well.

Jesus will just have to share.

Well, he's put up with worse, so.

Of course we could do Monday in a pinch.

- Monday?
- Do you want coffee?

- I...
- People are going to bring food.

Casseroles, lasagna, ham.

Someone always brings a ham.

What they should really bring

is some valium and a shrink.

( Laughs )

Gallows humor.

We need flowers,

tons of flowers,

roses, tulips, pansies, violets.

Oh!

Lilies! Lilies everywhere!

Is it lily season here?
Well, it's lily season somewhere.

I need to make a list of guests,

and we need a band.

Maybe Juliana can play
something on the cello.

I wonder if it's going to rain on Monday.

She hates to play in the rain.

Plus, rain and a memorial

is such a cliched combination.

- What are you doing?
- I don't know.

- Tin foil!
- Aah!

I need tin foil and toilet paper.

Oh God. All those people,

one guest bathroom.

Don't think about it, Fanny.

Just lie back and think of England.

I blame you.

Me too.

Senor Dawson...
( Speaking Spanish )

- Sorry.
-En espanol,senor Dawson.

Lo siento, senora Yockey.

Excuse me, miss Yockey?

Yes?

En espanol, senora Yockey.

( Sighs )
( Chuckles )

( Speaks Spanish )

What do you need?

I don't know if you've
heard the tragic news,

but the son of our beloved ballet teacher,

Fanny Flowers, was in a terrible
car accident last night.

I did hear. I'm so sorry.

Madame Fanny's been like
a surrogate mother to us.

All of us.

Especially Boo.

I don't know if she's heard.

The P.A. system
in this school is so sub-par.

Public schools... sad.

Anyhow,

I just think Boo would maybe
take it a little better

if her friends broke it to her first.

If it's okay.

Oh, of course.

I understand.

Boo?

Come here.

Bring your things.

- Come on, Boo.
- What's going on?

Why are you doing that?

- Did you hear?
- Hear what?

Hubbell was in a car accident last night

- and...
- And he's what?

See, she doesn't get the look either.

He's...

Oh my God. He's dead?

Oh, come on!
I just gave you that exact same look.

This is terrible.

I know it is. So bad.

Let's go.

- Where?
- Bus stop.

- What?
- Shh.

- Keep walking.
- We can't.

"Vengeance Walking"'s at 12:00 and 2:30.

- We're going to a movie?
- Everyone grieves

in their own way. Head down, look sad.

- Popcorn's on me.
- I don't understand.

I gave her the exact same look.

You have other gifts. Go.

Fanny: Well, I am planning
a memorial service.

For tomorrow, hopefully.

I understand that, but...

is there any other color I can get it in?

Fine. Goodbye. Well, it's official.

The people in the tent-rental
industry are very unpleasant.

The only company

that can get me a tent
to hold 100 people by Sunday

said all of their tents are white canvas.

White canvas.

No one in the world wanted pink or blue?

I asked them how much to dye a tent

and they laughed at me. Like I'm Ellen.

You have 100 people coming?

More. I went over the invite list

and realized I forgot to
invite the garden club.

Who do you know in the garden club?

I'm inviting most of the town
and they are in the town,

so that brings the head count up by 20.

Maybe I should forget a tent
and think about a theater.

I'll put that on the possible list.

Oh, here. I printed up a list

of Buddhist memorial
traditions off the Internet.

There are some chants you should learn.

Ah. Finally a chance to use

my high school Tibetan.

I remember years ago

when the husband of a friend of mine died.

My entire wiccan group

went down to the ocean at midnight,

sang a song,

threw our clothes off,

joined hands

and ran into the sea.

It was really beautiful.

There will be kids there.

They can wear floaties.

You were in a wiccan group?

Well, I was living in Vancouver.

I didn't ski, so.

Traditionally, everyone should wear

white robes and headbands.

We'll look like a cult.

Or a karate class.

Maybe instead of headbands,

everyone could wear a scarf?

Or a cape.

I love capes.

Who doesn't love a cape?

Where are we gonna get all those capes?

We can cut up that tent.

( Girls chattering )

Sasha: Boo! We're late!

We're not that late.

20 minutes. We are 20 minutes late.

Ow! Side cramp.

Rock in shoe.

Can't breathe. Breathing bad.

Slow down, you're killing your friends.

You don't want me to run to class,

next time tell me the real time.

- I did!
- You said it was 2:00. It was not 2:00!

It looked like 2:00.

Spots. Seeing spots.

It had not been 2:00 for an hour!

Oh, I think I'm gonna barf!

No you won't!

Not until we get inside.

- She's not even here.
- She's not?!

- I told you she wouldn't teach today.
- The day is not over yet.

- Oh, brother.
- We're going to hell.

- All of us.
- As long as I don't have to run there.

Madame Fanny's son dies and what do we do?

We watch Mark Wahlberg blow up France

- for two and a half hours.
- It was a long movie.

- Not my point, Melanie.
- Calm down.

What about a Mark Wahlberg movie
says "sorry for your loss"?

Nothing. We suck.

You suck, you suck, you suck.

I suck. We all suck.

But tell me how you really feel?

- We suck and we're going to hell.
- Wake up, Boo!

We live in hell.

The worst that can happen
is we go to carpinteria.

I'm getting dressed over there.

Do not follow me.

Boo.

Your dance space.

My dance space.

Any word from madame Fanny?

Nope. Nothing.

She's not gonna teach today.

I wouldn't want to teach either.

It's so weird, isn't it?

Yesterday he was here,

and today he's not.

Well, I heard they
found his shoe 30 feet away.

I heard they still haven't found his face.

Horrible.

We're horrible.

Everyone in this room is horrible.

I heard they had just had sex right before

he went out and...

- Give it up, Mel.
- Crap.

I wonder if that was the first
time they'd ever had sex.

I wonder if that was the first
time he'd ever had sex.

- That's probably what killed him.
- What are you talking about?

Okay, you're a virgin for 75 years

and then the first time you have sex,

you do it with a Las Vegas showgirl?

He couldn't handle it.

Dude drove right into a tree.

If an asteroid hit this place right now,

we absolutely had it coming.

When my grandmother died,
her spirit haunted our car.

- What?
- Yep.

Suddenly, the day after the funeral,

you couldn't start it is someone
was sitting in the passenger seat.

- Grandma really liked her passenger seat.
- What did you do?

- We sold the car.
- You sold your grandmother?

- And bought a ski-doo.
- Lightning hit our pool three years ago.

- Who died?
- No one.

We're talking death, Melanie.
Stay on topic.

Not enough "Hail Mary"s in the world.

I feel like we're missing
something special.

Something with flair.

( Cellphone rings )

Hello?

Yes.

I'm looking to have cocktail napkins made

with the Dalai Lama's face on them.

Does he ever not wear glasses?

Okay, she's acting crazy, right?

I don't know. Compared to what?

Not you, honey.

Oh. Then maybe.

She's in shock. She's in pain.

She hasn't talked about anything

but planning this memorial

since the accident happened.

When I picked her up
from the police station

she was wondering if
an evite was too informal.

It's denial.

The seven steps.

Dalai Lama cocktail napkins.

You go through a lot
of napkins at those things.

Well, that's basically done.

They just have to wire Tibet for
permission to use his likeness.

So where were we?

- Ah! Ice cream truck.
- Hey.

I just went out and got some bagels

if anyone's hungry.

No one eats carbs anymore.

Oh, okay.

Well, they're stale.

If that helps at all.
You know, all that chewing.

Helps burn some extra calories.

Is there anything I can do?

Nope.

So...

she's still here.

Wonder why.

- It just happened, Vi.
- I know.

But she really didn't know
him in the first place.

There's nothing here for her now.

She's awfully tall, isn't she?

- Was she ever a man?
- Why would you say that?

I don't know, I just think
the town could use

a woman who used to be a man,

to go with the republican

and the Liza Minnelli impersonator.

( Cellphone rings )

Hello?

Oh, it's the monk.

Yes, your holiness.

Thank you for calling me back.

- What are you doing?
- Cleaning up.

I'm cleaning up. Someone should clean up.

I could clean up.

Well, there's no point now.
It's almost done.

- Is there anything else I can do?
- No.

I didn't think anyone ate carbs anymore.

Yeah, well,

I'm thinking of singlehandedly
bringing them back.

You know, along with smoking, lead paint,

thalidomide, slip 'n slide.

Picturing my face under there?

( Door opens )
- I don't understand.

No, literally I don't understand.

Could you put the interpreter back on?

Oh, thank God, yes.

As I was trying to tell the Lama

while I'm very grateful he agreed

to pray for Hubbell,

I was actually hoping he would do it here.

At the memorial on Monday.

Or Tuesday. We're flexible about the day.

Could you ask him again?

Because I already have a monk in Ireland

who said he'd pray from there.

But I was really looking for someone

to represent, as the kids say.

What if I throw in a trip to Disneyland?

Does he have a friend
who's not busy chanting

for the Japanese people?

All right. Thanks anyway.

What is it about these monks?

How hard is it to get on a plane?

Well, at least he said he'd pray for him.

- That's nice.
- He can say anything he wants.

He's on another continent.
How do I know he's really doing it?

- Well, he is a monk.
- So?

So he's a monk.

Their to-do list basically consists of

"pray" and...

you know, "pray."

I take my spirituality very seriously.

If I don't see it with my own
eyes, I don't believe it.

Amen.

I can't believe he's gone.

- Oh, Truly.
- I'm sorry.

Don't be sorry.

You loved him.

Well, I did. I did love him.

You two were magic together.

Soulmates.

When you would make pies...

Well, he made pies. I just ate them.

They were so good.

Just be happy you found each other.

And know that no matter what
happened between the two of you,

he loved you with all his heart.

Really? Right here.

True love never dies.

It just takes a break for a while.

Okay. Anyone need some help?

No? Great. Going for a walk.

Truly: I thought we would get married.

I just wanted to call you mom.

Oh, honey.

You don't need a ring to call me mom.

Oh my God!

Hey.

Hey.

You taking a walk?

I guess.

You want to walk my dog?

( Cellphone ringing )

( Beeps )

Talia: Oh, finally!

Hi, Talia.

I can't believe you waited so long

to call me. Come on, I'm dying.

Tell me everything.

Uh...

I want to take notes
to tell the girls later.

Okay. Go.

( Sighs ) Well, we got here,

I bought a dress,

went to a party,

fought with his mom,

had sex,

danced with his mom,

he got in a car accident
and now he's dead.

Talia?

Hmm?

- Say it.
- Nope.

- Say it.
- Nope.

Talia.

You have the worst luck with men!

Yep. There you go.

I've never seen anything like it.

- Let it out.
- It's like you're cursed.

Or jinxed or built your house

on an ancient Indian burial ground.

Okay, gotta go.

No, wait!

Hanging up.

( Beeps )

You want a bone?

( Cellphone rings )

You have teeth?

( Rings )

( Sighs )

Talia: You danced with his mother?

Bye.

That was Talia.
She's older than she looks,

pass it on.
( Rings )

I'm sorry.

I'm back. Do over?

Okay.

How are you?

I'm... lost.

Oh, honey.

No, I'm genuinely lost.

I have no idea where I am.

Michelle...

I have nowhere to sit down.

I have nowhere to sleep.

I have no clothes to change into.

Oh my God, I have no key to the house.

I don't even know if she'll let me in

when I get back. If I get back.

- Michelle...
- No, seriously, Talia.

They won't let me do anything.

They won't let me clean up
or make phone calls.

She's calling her mom

and I'm walking an old guy's dog.

And that's not a sexual euphemism.

And I don't even know
when the memorial service is.

( Tearfully )
And no one eats carbs anymore.

( Sighs )

How was the sex?

Talia...

It was really really good.

Take a load off, Annie.

- That a service dog?
- Like a marine?

Like a seeing-eye dog, that kind of thing?

Yeah. He is my service dog.

When I get really drunk and pass out
in the gutter, he is my pillow.

Okay.

What'll you have?

Well, what's not gross here?

Oh, wow.

Really tricky questions for 100, Alex.

Uh...

that has its moments.

Okay. I'll have that and a margarita.

Okay.

So.

- What kind of day you having?
- That kind.

Thought so.

You had that look in your eye.

- This your place?
- For 20 years.

Used to be a nice respectable surf bar,

but with this freakin' economy,

you wanna make ends meet,
now you gotta serve brunch!

Bleh! I hate brunch.

Pick a meal.

Oh, a girl after my own heart.

To time-specific eating habits.

Here here.

Nice dog.

- Thanks.
- What's his name?

- Don't know.
- Is he dead?

- Don't know.
- Right on.

- I'm just walking him.
- Why?

Old guy asked me to.
Couldn't think of a reason to say no.

- You like dogs?
- Not particularly.

That could be your reason.

Where were you an hour ago?

- What's your name?
- Sophie Tucker.

Nice to meet you, Sophie. I'm Rico.

So you new in town?

Yep. Just got here yesterday.

Moving to a new town
on a Thursday... ballsy!

Yeah. I came here with my husband.

He lives here with his mother.

Well, he lived here with his mother.

Lived?

Past tense?

Junior college.

- Wait, you're that girl.
- I'm sorry?

You're the sex at the party girl.

Yeah. I am that girl.

Dude.

Tough break.

Rico!

Man, that thing in the kitchen.

What thing?

- You know, the thing!
- The fryer?

Yeah, the fryer.

- The fryer.
- What about it?

There's a sound.

A frying sound?

Man, I don't know about kitchens

and the things in kitchens.

Sophie Tucker, this is my wife Nina.

My name's not really Soph...

She's the sex at the party girl.

Whoa.

Dude.

Tough break.

( Cellphone ringing )

- Hello?
- Thought she'd have bigger boobs.

- What is that smell?
- It's the thing, man.

Oh man.

Oh, uh, I think you have the wrong...

Oh. Well, I don't know if we've hired

a sitar player for the memorial yet.

You'll have to talk to Fanny about that.

I don't know what's wrong
with her voicemail, so, I...

No, I don't need to hear you.

No, I really don't need to hear...

Well, you're very good.

Yes. Your mother is wrong.

Hey, how did you get my number?

Thank God I found you.

I forgot to ask Fanny
something very important,

and by the time I got back to her house

she had started her 16 hours
of meditative silence.

Is that yours?

Uh, yes. I'm gonna have to call you back.

Fanny asked me to do
a life-sized sculpture

of Hubbell.

To have on the deck at the memorial.

I do found object sculptures.

I'm in galleries.

On deck? On deck of what?

We're not sure.

There's talk of the Intrepid.

What?

That sounds crazy to you too, right?

The aircraft carrier
Intrepid from the war?

She said she was getting
a great deal on it.

- Something about a coupon.
- A coupon for an aircraft carrier?

I don't know.

She was so screwy earlier.

Though, I mean,
who could blame her, right?

I wish she'd talk.

But you know Fanny.

Not really.

Anyway, Fanny asked me

to do a sculpture,
which of course I'll do.

But I only do nudes.

So I'm gonna need some input.

- What?
- Now...

judging by his general build,

I'm guessing

he looked something like this.

( Rings )
Hello?

It's Minka from Cozy Catering.

I'm trying to get some confirmation

concerning the memorial service menu.

What kind of confirmation?

Just that the head count is now 500.

- That's impossible.
- Because if it is,

I don't get my new shipment
of tomatoes until Wednesday.

I can't have those tarts made until
Thursday, Friday at the latest.

The memorial can't be Friday.

Oh, Friday would be better for me too.

Gives me more time to do the detail work.

I'm gonna have to call you back.

- I'm sorry, I have to go.
- Wait! Wait.

- What do you think?
- Aah! Jeez.

Aaah.
( Grunts )

( Shudders )
Am I at least

in the ballpark?
( Grimaces )

Hmm.

This is ridiculous.

Boo?

- No.
- She's not coming.

- No.
- Boo, she's not going to teach today, okay?

If you keep us here any longer,
at least demand a ransom.

If madame Fanny suddenly decides

that she wants to teach today,

we are going to be here for her to teach.

You know you're crazy, right?

- Hey.
- Nobody's leaving!

Okay.

I have to go to the bathroom.

Never mind.

Fanny?

Fanny! Fanny!

- What?
- Sorry to interrupt

the whole suffocating-yourself
with-a-pillow thing,

- but things are happening that need your
attention. - My God.

- You nearly gave me a heart attack.
- I asked nicely... twice.

- Nothing. - I am in
the middle of a 16-hour meditative silence,

which only works if you're silent.

Well, I either need to talk to you now

or get more minutes on my phone plan.

First of all, we hired a sitar player.

He's very good. He's got the whole opening

of "Dear Prudence" down cold.

The caterer wants to know if
the head count is really 500,

'cause if it is, there's a
problem with the tarts,

which would push the
memorial back till Friday

which is great for the
woman making a sculpture

of my husband's genitalia
out of old hubcaps.

Also, the traditional
Buddhist mariachi band

you wanted is on tour in Bolivia
till fall, so what do you think?

Make it a Halloween theme?
Everyone can come in costume?

Everything's so jammed in here,

how can you find anything?

- The ham's right there.
- I see the ham.

Your daughter Truly handled the
fridge so I can't help you with that.

What do you want me to tell the caterer?

- I'll handle it.
- What do you want me

- to tell the mariachi band?
- I will handle it.

Where the hell did you get a
coupon to rent the Intrepid?

- Just let me handle it.
- And that would be great!

Except that you're not handling it.

And everyone is calling me and I
have no idea what to tell them.

( Phone rings )
( Groans )

( Beeps )
Yeah?

She's right here. It's for you.

Can I tell her what this is regarding?

Ringling Brothers says you can use

their tent on their down day, but
you have to go to Sacramento.

Yeah, I'm sorry.
That's not gonna work for us.

The voice of reason has just
reentered the building.

Thank you for the call though.

- What are you doing?
- I'm cutting the crazy quotient in half.

You have no right to cancel my tent.

500 people? Really, Fanny?

Are there even 500 people in this town?

- I'm calling that guy back.
- This is getting completely out of hand.

We cannot wait till 2014
to have this memorial.

It has to be now.
Tomorrow, like you planned originally

when it was supposed to be a
traditional Buddhist ceremony,

even though to my knowledge
Hubbell wasn't a Buddhist.

None of this is your concern.

I am going through this too, Fanny.

I came here. I gave up my life.

Oh, what a sacrifice that must have been.

No more getting paid in poker chips?

- I am his wife.
- And I am his mother!

And I have been his mother for 48 years.

And now I have to figure out
the proper way

to say goodbye to my son.

And if that includes
mariachi bands or circus tents

or fireworks or the damn Rockettes,

then it is for me to decide.

Because my heart is
completely broken forever.

And when your heart
is completely broken forever,

you get to do whatever you want,

no matter how crazy it seems to the woman

who was his wife for 24 hours.

I don't know what you want me to do.

I don't want you to do anything.

Ever.

That's it.

Hey. Hey, nobody leaves!

( Door opens )

Why aren't we doing anything?

- What?
- We should do something!

- Sasha, I..
- Madame Fanny is just sitting there alone

and sad and you're just sitting here

and we're just sitting in the studio
and no one is doing anything!

All day long we've done nothing.

Well, Boo lost her mind
and we went to a movie,

but other than that, nothing!

- Someone should do something!
- What?

I don't know.

Something.

Okay.

Where is everybody?

You're kidding, right?

You left.

And when you left, everybody left.

Well, did you try to stop them?

Did I?

Do you... I've been...

( sighs )

You're going to take 10
years off of my life.

How many chairs do you guys have here?
Is this it?

Oh, there's some in the boys'
dressing room, I think.

- What is she doing here?
Michelle: - She's looking for chairs

for people to sit on. Dog ears.

Okay, we're gonna need to
scrounge up some more seating.

Are there stools or I don't know,

short tables anywhere around here?

( Sniffles )

What's the matter?

Mark Wahlberg.

- I know.
- In France.

I'm behind here, what happened
to Mark Wahlberg in France?

Russian mobs, lots of guns.

Salma Hayek in a bra.

Is that sad? Because millions
of men would disagree with you.

We went to a movie.

Okay.

Today. We went to a movie today.

We... skipped school

and we went to a movie today.

Boo didn't want to and we all ignored her.

And we made her go.

- It's okay.
- It's not okay.

You don't even like Mark Wahlberg!

"The Departed" wasn't bad.

- We're going to hell.
- No, we're not.

- You said we were!
- I know, but I'm not like

the final word or anything.

- Hey.
- I'm sorry.

I'm sorry too.

I didn't mean to scare you guys with hell.

It's okay.

That's what hell is for.

( Sobbing )

They were fine when I left.

Okay, you guys. Look at me.

I don't need apologies.

God knows I cut school many a time

for incredibly dubious reasons.

And with me, nuns were involved,

so when you talk about hell,

I got a two bedroom penthouse
with a spa tub reserved there,

so cocktails at 6:00!

( Sobbing )

There's no crying in baseball!

Or ballet.

Plus, if you don't stop,

I'll start and I don't want to start.

You back?

You joining? You got phones?

Start dialing.

Okay.

I'm sorry for all the trouble,
the tarts sound lovely.

We're just going to postpone
the gathering for a while.

I don't really have the energy right now.

Thank you though.

Hello, Ravi?

It's Fanny Flowers.

Yes, I'm sorry, but there's been

a change of plans.

We won't need you at the memorial.

No, you are a very good sitar player.

It has nothing to do with your abilities.

We're just going to postpone...

That's not really necessary.
I've already heard you...

That was wonderful.

And if we were going to have a
memorial, you would definitely...

Well, have your mother call me.

( Knocks on door )
Ravi, I have to go.

Boo?

What are you...

Oh no. The class.

Oh my God, I forgot all about the class.

Yeah, we figured you did.

- I'm so sorry.
- It's okay.

We know you've got other things
to worry about right now.

Yes, but still, it's unforgivable.

Please apologize to the other kids for me?

- I will.
- Are they still there?

Oh no no. Everyone went home.

I was gonna lock up, but the sink
in the bathroom's running again

and I can't turn off the water.

That sink has been a problem
ever since I put it in.

Maybe if I tried a wrench?

That's all right, I'll take care of it.
You go on home.

But it's filling up.

I'll handle it.

Okay.

Um...

I'm sorry, madame Fanny.

Me too, Boo.

( Sighs )

Fanny: What's going on?

That's your seat.

I don't know you that well.

So I don't know what to say.

Sometimes it's better not to say anything.

Sometimes maybe

you just need to do something.

So, Fanny,

it's not the Intrepid.

But this is for you.

( Piano music playing )

♪ The sun come up

♪ it was blue and gold ♪

♪ the sun come up

♪ it was blue and gold ♪

♪ the sun come up

♪ it was blue and gold ♪

♪ ever since I put your picture... ♪

You did this?

I didn't do anything.

They did.

♪ I'm gonna love you

♪ till the wheels come off ♪

♪ oh

♪ yeah

( music continuing )

♪ I love you, baby

♪ and I always will

♪ ever since I put your picture ♪

♪ in a frame

♪ ever since I put your picture ♪

♪ in a frame

♪ mmm.

( People chattering )

- Bye-bye.
- Bye.

That was quite a dance.

They had some pretty good training.

They certainly did.

I liked the song.

Tom Waits.

I found it in Hubbell's CD player,

so I figured...

It's a very good song.

So...

how are you?

I think I stole a dog.

Jerry: Fanny!

Jerry!

Will you excuse me?

Sure.

Ginny: Michelle!

Well?

- Well, what?
- How was it?

- How'd we do?
- Who fell?

- Somebody fell.
- It sounded like Edgar.

He has a very distinctive thud.

- We sucked.
- I sucked.

- No one sucked.
- Someone sucked.

- Someone always sucks.
- No one sucked.

No one fell. You guys were perfect.

You melted my cold
frozen tundra of a heart.

- Do you think madame Fanny liked it?
- No. No, I don't.

Come on.

I think it was exactly was she needed.

Seriously.

You guys, you were truly great.

- It was fun. For funeral dancing, I mean.
- That sounds creepy.

Hey, let's go say hi to madame Fanny.

Yeah, go take your bows.

- You did good.
- Three hours of rehearsal, what do you expect?

So are you leaving now?

Not as long as the ham holds out.

No. I mean, are you leaving?

Oh.

I don't know.

Michelle, there's someone
I want you to meet.

This is Jerry Morton.

Jerry and Hubbell went to school together.

Michelle is Hubbell's wife.

- My daughter-in-law.
- It's nice to meet you, Jerry.

You too. Hubbell's been driving us crazy

at our poker game for a
year talking about you.

Really?

Yeah. He was insane about you.

Told us every little detail.

Shoe size nine, right?

- Wow.
- Oh, yeah.

When he met you, that was it.

I'm so sorry.

Thank you.

Well, I should get going.

If you need anything,
Fanny, anything at all.

I'll call you first thing.

And as soon as things settle down a bit,

you just stop by the office and
we'll... we'll get the paperwork done.

- Fanny can tell you where it is.
- Paperwork?

Just some signatures, no rush.

Signatures for what?

For the will transfer.

Well, I thought...

I thought he told you...

he called me on the way back from Vegas.

The land, the house...

he left everything to you.