Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1996–2003): Season 7, Episode 22 - Chosen - full transcript

Previously on
Buffy the vampire slayer.

There's only one thing
I've ever been sure of-you.

You're the one, Buffy.

- Trying to turn a bunch
of little girls into an army?

They're potential slayers.

We're dealing with a big bad that
can be any dead person it wants.

Where are we going?

Dearest dawn.
What's this?

Don't be angry with Xander.

- This isn't the place
for either of you.

A scythe forged in secrecy
for one like you.



Does this mean I can win?

I was kind of hoping
it would go this way.

Hey.

At least you could tell me
you're glad to see me.

That bitch.

Well, I guess that qualifies as
"happy to see me."

Angel, what are you
doing h-

don't even.
I just want to bask.

Okay, I'm basked.
What are you doing here?

Not saving a damsel in distress,
that's for sure.

Well, you know me.
Not much with the "damseling."

- Got your share of distress though.
- You heard?

I got coverage
on the whole thing.

It's very gripping.
It needs a third act.



- You have to leave L.A.
- it's the first, right?

The first evil?

The power that tried to
convince me to kill myself?

Yeah. It's gotten a little
more ambitious since then.

- It's raising an army.
- Yeah, well, it failed once, and I'm here to tell you-

are you ready
to finish this, bitch?

Okay. How many times
do I have to kill you?

- Ballpark figure?
- You understand nothing.

You think you have
power over me?

Stupid girl!
You'll never stop me.

You don't have the-

who does nowadays?

Okay. Now I'm pissed.
Where is he?

He had to split.

Yeah.
She needs you real bad.

I'll have the guys go through that,
see if there's anything new.

- Reliable source?
- Not remotely.

Mmm. Any port
in an apocalypse.

I, uh, brought
somethin' else as well.

I can already tell you I have
nothing that goes with that.

- It's not for you.
- Explainy?

I don't know everything. It's very
powerful and probably very dangerous.

Has a purifying power or cleansing
power-possibly scrubbing bubbles.

The translation is, uh-ugh.

Anyway, it bestows strength to
the right person who wears it.

- And the right person is?
- Someone ensouled.

But stronger than human.
A champion. It isn't me.

- Or me.
- No.

I don't know nearly enough about
this to risk you wearing it.

Besides, you got
that real cool...

Ax thing goin' for you.

So you're gonna
be with me in this?

Shoulder to shoulder.
I'm yours.

No.

- "No" what?
- No.

You're not gonna be
in this fight.

- Why the hell not?
- Because I can't risk you.

- You need me in this.
- No, I need you gone.

Why?

If I lose, if this thing
gets past sunnydale...

Then it's days, maybe hours,
before the rest of the world goes.

- I need a second front, and I need you to run it.
- Okay.

That's one reason.
What's the other?

There is no other.

Is it spike?

You're not tellin' me somethin'.

The scent-
I remember it pretty well.

You vampires.

Anybody ever you the whole smelling
people thing's a little gross?

- Is he your boyfriend?
- Is that your business?

You in love with him?

Okay, maybe
I'm out of line...

But this is kind of
a curve ball for me.

I mean, we are talkin'
about spike here.

It's different.
He's different.

- He has a soul now.
- Oh.

- Well-
- what?

That's great.
Everyone's got a soul now.

- He'll make a difference.
- You know, I started it-

the whole "having a soul"-

before it was all
the cool new thing.

Oh, my god.
Are you 12?

I'm gettin' the brush-off
for captain peroxide.

It doesn't necessarily bring out
the champion in me.

You're not getting
the brush-off.

Are you just gonna come here and go all
Dawson on me every time I have a boyfriend?

- Aha! Boyfriend!
- He's not.

But...

He is in my heart.

That'll end well.

What was the highlight
of our relationship?

When you broke up with me
or when I killed you?

I'm well aware of my
stellar history with guys.

And, no, I don't see...

Fat grandchildren
in the offing with spike.

And I don't think that
really matters right now.

You know, in the midst
of all this... insanity...

A couple of things are actually
starting to make sense.

And the guy thing-

I always figured there was
something wrong with me...

You know, because I
couldn't make it work.

Maybe I'm not supposed to.

Because you're the slayer.

Because-

okay.
I'm cookie dough.

I'm not done baking.

I'm not finished becoming...

Whoever the hell it is
I'm gonna turn out to be.

I make it through this
and the next thing...

And the next thing, and...

Maybe one day I turn around
and realize I'm ready.

I'm cookies.

And then, you know,
if I want someone to eat-

or enjoy warm, delicious...

Cookie me, then...

That's fine.

That'll be then...

When I'm done.

Any thoughts on
who might enjoy-

do I have to go
with the cookie analogy?

I'm not really thinking
that far ahead.

That's kind of the point.

I'll go start workin'
on the second front.

Make sure I don't
have to use it.

Angel?

I do...

Sometimes think
that far ahead.

Sometimes is something.

Be a long time coming.

Years, if ever.

I ain't gettin' any older.

- Ow.
- Dumbass.

Don't look at me. This is a summers' thing.
It's all very violent.

If you get killed,
I'm telling.

Did you find out anything
about the scythe?

It slices, dices,
and makes julienne preacher.

- Caleb?
- I cut him in half.

- All right!
- He had that coming.

Hey, party in my eye socket,
and everyone's invited.

Sometimes
I shouldn't say words.

So, where's tall,
dark and forehead?

Let me guess.
You can smell him?

Yeah. That, and I also used my
enhanced vampire eyeballs...

To watch you
kissing him.

It was... a hello.

Most people don't use
their tongues to say hello.

Or I guess they do, but-

there were no tongues.
Besides, he's gone.

Oh, just popped by
for a quickie then?

Good. Good. I haven't had quite enough
jealous vampire crap for one night.

He wears lifts, you know.

You know, one of these days I'm just gonna put
you two in a room and let you rassle it out.

- No problem at this end.
- Hmm.

There could be oil
of some kind involved.

- Where's the trinket?
- The "who-ket"?

The pretty necklace your sweetie-bear
gave you. The one with all the power.

I believe it's mine now.

- How do you figure?
- Someone with a soul, but more than human.

Angel meant to wear it. That
means I'm the qualified party.

It's volatile.
We don't know-

you'll be needing someone strong to bear it
then. You plannin' on givin' it to Andrew?

Angel said the amulet was meant
to be worn by a champion.

Been called a lot
of things in my time.

Faith still has my room.

Well, you're not stayin' here.

You can't buy me off with
shiny beads and sweet talk.

You got angel breath.

I'm not gonna just let you whack me
back and forth like a rubber ball.

I've got my pride, you know?

I understand.

Clearly you don't, 'cause the whole "havin'
my pride" thing was just a smoke screen.

Oh, thank god.

I don't know what I would have done
if you'd have gone up those stairs.

Pretty, ain't it?

- You're not him.
- No, you killed him, right and proper.

Terrible loss.
This man was my good right arm.

Course, it don't
pain me too much.

Don't need an arm.
Got an army.

An army of vampires.
However will I fight-

every day
our numbers swell.

But then you do have
an army of your own.

Some 30-odd pimply-faced girls, don't
know the pointy end of a stake.

- Maybe I should call this off.
- You ever considered a cool name?

I mean, since you're incorporeal
and basically powerless.

How about the taunter?
Strikes fear in the heart of-

I will overrun this earth.

And when my army outnumbers
the humans on this earth...

The scales will tip,
and I will be made flesh.

Talk on.
I'm not afraid of you.

Then why aren't you asleep
in your dead lover's arms?

'Cause he can't help you.

Nor faith.
Nor your friends.

Certainly not your
wanna-slay brigade.

None of those girlies will ever
know real power unless you're dead.

Now, you know the drill.

Into every generation,
a slayer is born.

One girl
in all the world.

She alone will have
the strength and skill to-

there's that word again.

What you are.
How you'll die-

alone.

Where's your snappy comeback?

You're right.

Hmm.
Not your best.

I'm drowning in cool whip.

Weird dream.

Buffy.

- Is there something wrong?
- No.

Yeah.

I just realized something.

Something that really
never occurred to me before.

We're gonna win.

What do you think?

That depends.

Are you in any way...
Kidding?

You don't think
it's a good idea?

- It's pretty radical, b.
- It's a lot more than that.

Buffy, what you said, it-it flies in
the face of everything we've ever-

every generation has ever done
in the fight against evil.

I think it's bloody brilliant.

- You mean that?
- If you want my opinion.

- Really do.
- Whoa.

Hey. Not to-to poop
on the party here...

But I'm the guy that's gonna
have to pull this thing off.

It is beaucoup de mojo.

This goes beyond anything
I've ever done.

It's a total loss of control...

And not in a nice, wholesome, "my girlfriend
has a pierced tongue" kind of way.

I wouldn't ask if I didn't
think you could do it.

I-I-I'm not sure
that I'm stable enough.

You can do this, Willow.
We'll get the coven...

On the line, and-and we'll
find out how they can help.

Oh!

Pierced tongue.

- Dawn needs to do a research thing.
- Yes, you do.

It's cool.
Watcher junior to the library.

I'll go dig up my sources-
quite literally, actually.

- Come on.
- The only two people I have to speak to are dead.

Let's go assemble
Cannon fodder.

That's not what we're
callin' 'em, sweetie.

Not to their faces.
What, am I insensitive?

I hate this.

I hate being here.

I hate that you
have to be here.

I hate that there's evil...

And that I was chosen
to fight it.

I wish a whole lot of the time
that I hadn't been.

I know a lot of you wish
I hadn't been either.

This isn't about wishes.

This is about choices.

I believe
we can beat this evil.

Not when it comes. Not when
its army is ready. Now.

Tomorrow morning,
I'm opening the seal.

I'm going down into the hellmouth, and
I am finishing this once and for all.

Right now you're asking yourself
what makes this different.

What makes us anything more than a bunch
of girls being picked off one by one?

It's true. None of you have the
power that faith and I do.

So here's the part
where you make a choice.

It's one hell
of a risky idea.

Buffy's wacky that way.

Yeah. There's one more vent
right by the stairs.

If we block that,
they got no sewer access.

That should drive them straight
up into the school proper.

- That's assuming they get past us.
- Which, no offense, I am.

Come on. You gotta have
a little faith.

I think I've had
my share, thanks.

Well, I trundled right
into that one, didn't I?

Look, I'm sorry if it seemed like I
was blowing you off the other day.

I was just trying to,
you know, blow you off.

Yeah, you know what? I figured
that one out all by myself.

It's nothin' personal. It's just,
after I get bouncy with a guy...

There's not that much more
I need to know about him.

- That's bleak.
- The way of the world.

That's good to know, 'cause for a
second there, I thought it was more...

Defensive, isolationist
slayer crap.

And he comes out swingin'.

Faith, there's a whole world out there
that you don't even know about.

And a lot of the men in it
are pretty decent guys.

They'd surprise you.

A guy looks at me, let's just
say his priorities shift.

- Oh, why? Because you're so hot?
- It is what it is, yo.

Oh, please. I am so much
prettier than you are.

Oh, and, uh,
for the record...

Our little encounter
didn't exactly change my world.

You're trippin'.
That was rock 'em, sock 'em.

Oh, no, no, no. It was-it was-
it was nice enough, you know...

And-and you're-
you're very, um, mmm, enthused.

And I think with a little
more experience, you-

- dude, I got mad skills.
- Yeah, of course. Let's finish up.

Oh, hell with that.
We're goin' again, baby.

- You're gonna learn a little respect here, pal.
- Faith-

make me a deal, all right?

We live through this, you give
me the chance to surprise you.

What will be
the surprise?

You do know the meaning
of the word, right?

Fine. Deal.

Good enough.

- No way you're prettier than me.
- Little bit, yeah.

I really wish she hadn't
said that about me.

What?
The thing Buffy said?

I think it's true.

I'll be with you
to keep you grounded.

Yeah, well, you might have to keep me
"stab-ded" if I go to the bad place.

You're sayin' I might
have to kill you.

- I am.
- Bite me!

I will.
I mean, I do... mean it.

The darkest place I've ever been-
this is what lies beyond that.

- This is too important for me-
- Buffy believes in you.

You know Buffy?
Sweet girl. Not that bright.

Hey, I'm the first one to call her
out when she's not making sense.

In fact, this may have
escaped your keen notice...

But I'm...
Kind of a brat.

I've always sort of
gotten my way.

So you're gonna make it through
this, no matter how dark it gets.

Because now...

You're my way.

I'd better
go over this again.

I-I-I'm all turned around.
Y-you're here, yeah?

By the pillar, yeah.
Protecting this area.

That puts me over by the door.
Demons around the perimeter.

Right.
I open the door.

"You go through the door and are
confronted by trogdor the burninator."

Oh, bugger it.
A fight.

Adios to five hit points.
"Trogdor has badly wounded you."

Wait a minute. What about
my, uh, "bag of illusions"?

Illusions against a burninator?

Silly, silly British man.

I invoke a time flux
on trogdor.

- Step down, girlfriend. You can't
just... ninth-level sorcerer...

And I carry
the emerald chalice.

Trogdor is frozen in time.
Deal with it.

Smackdown on red riding hood.
This could get ugly.

How could it possibly get uglier? I used
to be a highly respected watcher...

And now I'm a wounded dwarf with
the mystical strength of a doily.

I just wish
I could sleep.

What kind of person could sleep
on a night like this?

Only the crazy ones.

Welcome to sunnydale high.

There's no running in the halls,
no yelling, no gum chewing.

Apart from that,
there's only one rule.

- If they move, kill them.
- Okay. Potentials in the basement.

Follow faith and spike.

If you have to go to the
bathroom, it's to your left.

If you don't have to go to the bathroom,
picture what you're about to face.

Better to go now.

- Willow, my office is straight through there.
- It's right over the seal.

- I'll start getting you set up.
- Thanks.

Okay. Civilians.
If the vampires get upstairs...

We have three areas they can get through to
another building and then down into the sewers-

down the hall in the atrium...

The north hall here,
and the primary target:

Through the lounge, straight
to the science building.

Now, odds are
most of them will head there.

Teams of two then. I suggest
you and I take the lounge.

- I concur.
- Xander, I want you with dawn.

- I concur.
- We'll check out the atrium.

So that leaves me and the dungeon
master in the north hall?

- We will defend it with our very lives.
- Yes.

We will defend it
with his very life.

- And don't be afraid to use him as a human shield.
- Good. Yes. Thanks.

I just want to say
how proud I am to die...

For this very special
cause with you guys.

There's some, um-

there's some people
I'd like to thank...

Both good and evil,
uh-

a shout-out to
my brother Tucker...

Who gave me the inspiration
to summon demons...

- And also... nobody
cares, you little monkey.

I'm gonna check out
our field of engagement.

- Dawn-
- no.

Anything you say is gonna
sound like good-bye.

- So, what do you guys want to do tomorrow?
- Nothing strenuous.

Well, mini-golf is always the
first thing that comes to mind.

I think we can do
better than that.

I was thinking
about shopping...

- As per usual.
- Oh, there's an Arden b. In the new mall.

I could use a few items.

Are we gonna discuss this? Save
the world or go to the mall?

- I'm having a wicked shoe craving.
- Aren't you on the patch?

- Those never work.
- Here I am, invisible to the eye.

See, I need a new look.
It's this whole eye patch thing.

Oh! You could go with the
full black secret-agent look.

Or the puffy shirt,
the pirate slash-

the earth
is definitely doomed.

You first, b.

They should be in place.

Okay.
Magic time.

You ready to-
kill me?

Starting to be.

Good. Fun.

Great.

Brace yourself.

Come on, red.

Make it happen.

Not to be a buzz kill, luv...

But my fabulous accessory isn't
exactly tingling with power.

- I'm not worried.
- I'm getting zero juice here.

- And I look like Elizabeth Taylor.
- Cheer up, Liz.

If Willow's big spell
doesn't work...

It won't matter
what you wear.

I'm not worried.

- I'm not worried.
- Really?

- 'Cause I'm flashing back to Xander's whole bathroom speech.
- Buffy?

I'm not worried.

Long as Willow can work
her spell before they...

See us.

Willow?

Oh... my... goddess.

So here's the part
where you make a choice.

What if you could
have that power? Now?

In every generation,
one slayer is born...

Because a bunch of men who died thousands
of years ago made up that rule.

They were powerful men.
This woman...

- Is more powerful than all of them combined.
- Mmm.

So I say
we change the rule.

I say my power
should be our power.

Tomorrow, Willow will use
the essence of the scythe...

To change our destiny.

From now on,
every girl in the world...

Who might be a slayer...

Will be a slayer.

Every girl who could have the
power, will have the power.

Can stand up, will stand up.

Slayers.

Every one of us.

Make your choice.

Are you ready to be strong?

These guys are dust.

Willow?

You... are a goddess.

And you're a slayer.

Get this to Buffy.

Ha! That was nifty.

Buffy!

Catch!

I could get used to this.

They're leaving!
They're retreating!

I think they're coming.

Oh, god. I'm terrified.

I didn't think. I mean, I-I just
figured you'd be terrified...

And I would be
sarcastic about it.

Picture happy things.
A lake.

Candy canes.
Bunnies.

Bunnies.

Floppy, hoppy...
Bunnies.

I have swimmer's ear!

Buffy!

Look at this thing now.

I think it's-

keep the line together! Drive them
to the edge! We cannot let them-

Buffy!

Hold the line.

We call it the greenhouse effect.
Very dangerous.

Rona!

Oh, no. Ow.

Mommy, this mortal wound
is all itchy.

You pulled a nice trick.

You came pretty close
to smacking me down.

What more do you want?

I want you...

To get out of my face.

Oh, bollocks.

- Buffy!
- Spike!

Everybody out!
Now!

- I can feel it, Buffy.
- What?

My soul.

It's really there.

Kinda stings.

Get out of the way!

- What?
- Hurry up!

- The bus.
- Get 'em on the bus!

Everybody, this way!

Anya?

Anya?

- Go on, then.
- No. No, you've done enough. You could still-

no. You've beat them back.
It's for me to do the clean-up.

Buffy, come on!

Gotta move, lamb.

Think it's fair to say,
school's out for bloody summer.

- Spike-
- I mean it. I gotta do this.

I love you.

No, you don't.

But thanks for sayin' it.

Now, go!

I want to see how it ends.

Oh, it's okay.

Look at me!
This is nothing!

Stay awake!
This is nothing!

Why didn't I die?

Ease off.
We're clear.

I don't understand.
What did this?

Spike.

So did you see?

I-I was scared.
I'm sorry.

Did you see what happened?
I mean, was she-

she was incredible.

She died saving my life.

That's my girl.
Always doing the stupid thing.

It's not bad. You just sit here.

- I'll get someone-
- hey.

Did-
did we make it?

We made it.
We won.

Surprise.

Looks like the hellmouth is
officially closed for business.

There's another one in Cleveland,
not to spoil the moment.

We saved the world.

We changed the world.

I can feel them, Buffy.

All over.

Slayers are awakening
everywhere.

- We'll have to find them.
- We will.

Yes, because the mall
was actually in sunnydale...

So there's no hope
of going there tomorrow.

We destroyed the mall?
I fought on the wrong side.

All those shops gone-

the gap, Starbucks,
toys "r" us.

Who will remember all those landmarks
unless we tell the world about them?

We have a lot of work
ahead of us.

- Can I push him in?
- You've got my vote.

I just want to sleep, yo.
For, like, a week.

I guess we all could,
if we wanted to.

Yeah. The first
is scrunched, so-

what do you think
we should do, Buffy?

Yeah, you're not the one
and only chosen anymore.

Just gotta live like a person.
How's that feel?

Yeah, Buffy.
What are we gonna do now?

Grr! Arrgh!