Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1996–2003): Season 3, Episode 7 - Revelations - full transcript

If I could walk

Oh

You kow I'd ever lie

Oz! Hey! Have a seat...

Except. We don't have any seats.

It's ok.
I'll just scrunch in.

Xander.

Why are you giving me
a lap dance?

What?
I just like you.

Willow:
And that's very beautiful.

I think it's great
when two people like two people



and want to be close to them
instead of anyone else.

Hear. Hear!

Yeah. Well put.
Hey. Can I snag a sip?

- Sure.
- Yeah. You got it.

[Room Applauds]

Thank you!

Thank you.
We're here through Saturday.

Enjoy the veal.

Why are you guys so hyper?

Hey! Speaking of people and things
they do that aren't like usual.

anyone notice Buffy
acting sort of different?

Let's see. Uh.
killing zombies...

uh. Torching
sewer monsters...

uh. No. That's pretty much
the. Uh. Same old Buffster.



Well. I just mean. You know.
she's off by herself a lot more.

and she's kind of...
distracted.

Think maybe she
has a new honey?

A boyfriend?

Why wouldn't she tell us?

Excuse me?

When your last steady
killed half the class.

then your rebound guy sends you
a dump-o-gram? It makes a girl shy.

But we're the best of
Buffy's bestest buds.

She'd tell us.

Tell you what?

About your new boyfriend.
who we made up... unless we didn't?

This was a topic of discussion?

Well. Raised.
but never discussed.

So. Are you dating
somebody or not?

I wouldn't use
the word "dating."

but I am going out
with somebody...

Tonight.
as a matter of fact.

Really? Who?

Yo. What's up?
Hey. Time to motorvate.

Really. We're just
good friends.

[Grunting]

Synchronized slaying.

New Olympic category?

What do you think?

Woman: Sloppy.

You telegraph punches.
leave blind sides open and.

for a school-night slaying.
take entirely too much time.

Which one of you is Faith?

Depends.
Who the hell are you?

Gwendolyn Post. Mrs.
Your new watcher.

Faith:
I'm telling you.

I don't need a new watcher.
No offense. Lady.

I just have this problem
with authority figures.

They end up kind of dead.

Duly noted. And fortunately.
it's not up to you.

Mr. Giles. Where do you keep
the rest of your books?

I... I'm sorry. The rest?

Yes. The actual library.

Oh. I see.

I can assure you. Mrs. Post.

this is the finest occult
reference collection...

...this side of
the Atlantic. I'm sure.

Do you have Hume's
Paraormal Ecyclopedia?

The labyrinth maps of Malta?

It's on order.

Well. I suppose that you have

Sir Robert Kane's
Twilight Compedium?

Oh!

Yes. I... Yes.

Yes. I do.

Yes. Of course you do.

I have been sent by the Council

for a very important reason.

Faith needs a watcher.

I am to act in that capacity
and report back.

Excuse me. Mary Poppins.
you don't seem to be listening...

Faith. If the Council feels that
you need closer observation.

then... we will all.
of course. Cooperate.

The Council wishes me to report

on the entire situation here.

including you.

Hmm. Academic probation's
not so funny today. Huh. Giles?

Mrs. Post: The fact is.
there is talk in the Council

that you have become
a bit too... American.

- Me?
- Him?

A demon named Lagos is
coming here to the Hellmouth.

Mr. Giles. An illustration
of Lagos. If you please.

Oh. Uh... yes. Uh...

Perhaps later.

Lagos seeks
the Glove of Myhnegon.

No record of this glove's
full power exists.

But we do know it is highly
dangerous and must not fall
into the hands of a demon.

Lagos must be stopped.

What do you propose?

Well. If it's not
too radical a suggestion.

I thought
we might kill him.

I suggest two slayers
at full strength

for a coordinated hunt.

We believe the glove to be buried
in a tomb somewhere.

so Lagos will be headed
for the cemetery.

There is more than one

in Sunnydale.

I see. How many?

Uh. 12. within the city limits.

Well. We'll just have to
take them one at a time.

Anything in your books
that might pinpoint

the exact location of
the tomb would be useful.

But then. We cannot
ask for miracles.

We will begin
tomorrow at sunset.

Faith...
with me. Please.

That was bracing.

Interesting lady.

Can we kill her?

I think the Council
might frown upon that.

Well... how do you feel
about a spot of training?

Uhh...
I got to go.

Big night for us slayer types.

People to see...
demons to kill.

Better hurry before somebody
figures out what we're doing.

What are we doing?

Training.

And almost kissing.

Sorry.

It's just...
old habit.

Bad. Bad habit...
to be broken.

It's hard.

It's not hard.
Cold turkey.

That's the key to quitting.

You think they make
a patch for this?

You have to go.

I really do.

I'm going to try and vent
a little hormonal angst

by going out there
and killing a Lagos.

whatever that is.

Lagos?

Some demon looking for some
all-powerful thingamabob.

and I got to stop him before
he unleashes unholy havoc.

and it's another
Tuesday night in Sunnydale.

Be careful.

Oh. This is intolerable.

There's not a word here
about Lagos or the glove.

We don't have time
for this near-missing.

Just find out all you can
about the demon...

its strengths. Its weaknesses.
its places of origin...

and most importantly. What it plans
to do with this blasted glove.

Hey. You're not
the watcher of me.

Then go home. But if you
choose to stay. Then work.

Ugh...

It's late. I'm tired.

What does he want
from us. Anyway?

The number of
a qualified surgeon

to remove the British flag
from his butt?

My eyes are all blurry.

Ohh...

Oh. Stop.

Right.

Stop means no...

and no means no. So. Um...

stop.

Willow. Xander. You can stop
your. Uh. Studying.

I've got what I need.

What have you got?

Uh. The probable location
of the Glove of Myhnegon.

It's housed in
the Von Hauptman family crypt.

Yeah. That's that big one
over at the Restfield Cemetery.

Yeah. Well.
that's great. Giles.

How'd you find it?

I looked.

Where's Buffy at?

Uh. I'm not sure.

Well. I'll go check out
this crypt.

Tell her heads-up
if she stops by.

Yes. By all means. Go.

And I'll just keep studying.

I think we're on the verge
of a big Lagos breakthrough.

No. I'd say we're done.

Ronnie. Deadbeat.

Steve. Klepto.

Kenny... drummer.

Eventually. I just had to face up
to my destiny as a loser magnet.

Now it's strictly
get some. Get gone.

You can't trust guys.

You can trust some guys.

Really.
I've read about them.

Yeah.
So. What about you?

You mean like.
me and guys me?

Hmm. Not much
to tell these days.

Yeah. But you
got to have stories.

I mean. I've had
my share of losers.

but you... you boinked
the undead.

What was that like?

Life with Angel's...
was complicated.

It's still a little hard
for me to talk about.

Well. Try.

Look. Faith.

all the Angel issues are
still kind of with me.

so if you don't mind.
i'd rather not.

Yeah...

Yeah. Whatever.

You know what?
We're 0 for 6 tonight.

Why don't we just
blow this off?

I am kind of beat...

But Shady Hill's pretty close.

I'll swing through it.
It's on my way anyway.

Alone? I don't know if I'd...

I got Miss Priss
on my back now.

I don't need
another baby-sitter.

I'll holler
if I'm having any fun.

OK.

Later.

Thanks.

[Rustling. Scraping]

Son of a bitch.
It's my lucky day.

Uh!

[Grunting]

Rrrahh!

Uh!

Ohh...

Rrrahh!

Hey. Giles.
here's a nifty idea.

Why don't I alleviate my guilt
by going out and getting myself
really. Really killed?

Oh. God...

Buffy...

What am I doing?

What are you doing?

- I don't know.
- Shame on you!

Oh. God. I...

I don't even know
why I came back here.

It's good you did.

I think I have
what you're looking for.

Great. Just. Wherever
this was gift-wrapped.

remind me
not to shop there.

Glove of Myhnegon.

The world's ugliest
fashion accessory.

No. Don't.

Once you put it on.
the glove can never be removed.

So... no touching.

Kind of like us.

You hold on to it. I'll... I'll
tell Giles in the morning.

At least he'll be happy.

Ah! Yes. There we are.

There's
a wood engraving. See?

The Glove of Myhnegon.

Yes. Engraved by
Father Theodore of Wolsham.

Yes.

Based. I believe.

on very sketchy and
unreliable folk legends.

The pictures are fun
to look at. Mr. Giles.

but one really ought to read
the nice words as well.

Ah... yes.

Some tea. Perhaps?

I know that you must
find me tiresome.

but it's insidious. Really.

A person slips up on
the little things.

And soon everything has gone
to hell in a handbasket.

For example...
Buffy. Your slayer...

Mrs. Post...
I can assure you

that Buffy is both
dedicated and industrious.

and I am in complete
control of my slayer.

[Door Rattles]

Giles!
We have a big problem.

It's Buffy.

Will you excuse us?

[Whispering]

Would you like
some assistance?

Thank you.

That won't be necessary.

Lagos is out of luck.

I got the magic mitten thingy.

What's with
all the tragedy masks?

What's with
all the tragedy masks?

Better take a seat. Buffy.

What's going on?

We know Angel is alive.

Xander saw you with him.

It would appear that you've been
hiding him and that you lied to us.

Willow: Nobody's here
to blame you. Buffy.

But this is serious.
You need help.

It's not what you think.

Hope not.

Because I think you're
harboring a vicious killer.

Willow: This isn't
about attacking Buffy.

Remember.
"l" statements only...

"I feel angry."
"I feel worried."

Cordelia: Fine.

Here's one...
I feel worried...

about me!

Last time around. Angel
barely laid a hand on Buffy.

He was way more interested
in killing her friends.

But he's better now.

Better for how long. Buffy?

I mean. Did you even
think about that?

What is this.
Demons Anonymous?

I don't need
an intervention. Here.

Oh. Don't you?

You must've known
it was wrong seeing Angel

or you wouldn't have
hidden it from all of us.

I was going
to tell you. I was.

It was just that I...
I didn't know why he came back.

I just wanted to wait...

For what?
For Angel to go psycho again

the next time
you give him a happy?

I'm not going to...

We're not together like that.

But you were kissing him.

You were spying on me?

What gives you the right?

Cordelia: What gives you
the right to suck face

with your demon lover again?

It was an accident.

What. You just tripped
and fell on his lips?

It was wrong. OK?
I know that.

and I know that
it can't happen again.

But you guys
have to believe me.

I would never
put you in any danger.

If I thought for a second

that Angel was
going to hurt anyone...

...you would stop him.

Like you did last time
with Ms. Calendar.

Willow: Buffy.

I feel that
when it comes to Angel.

you can't see straight.

And that's why we're... we're all
going to help you face this.

But he's better now.
I swear.

Look. You guys. He's the one
that found the Glove of Myhnegon.

He's keeping it safe for us
in the mansion.

Right! Great plan.

Leave tons of firepower
with a scary guy.

and leave us
to clean up the mess.

You would just love an excuse
to hurt him. Wouldn't you?

I don't need an excuse.

I think lots of dead people
actually constitutes a reason.

Right.
This is all nobility.

This has nothing to do
with jealousy.

Hello?
Miss Not-Over-Yourself-Yet?

Don't you start with me.

Giles. No one's doing
the "l" statements.

That's enough! Everybody.

Now Buffy knows our concerns.

and her actions.
however ill-advised.

can be understood.

Our... priority right now

is to retrieve
the Glove of Myhnegon

and try to destroy it.

Now. All of you.
back to classes.

Thanks for the bail in there.

I know this is
a lot to absorb.

but Angel did find the glove.
and that was a good...

Be quiet.

I won't remind you
that the fate of the world

often lies with the slayer.

What would be the point?

Nor shall I remind you that
you've jeopardized the lives

of all that you hold dear

by harboring
a known murderer.

But sadly. I must remind you
that Angel tortured me...

for hours...
for pleasure.

You should have told me
he was alive. You didn't.

You have no respect for me
or the job I perform.

[Knock On Door]

[Knock On Door]

A word of advice?

Vampires rarely knock.

Especially in daylight.

Oh. Right.

So... this is your home.

Yeah. The decorator
actually just left.

Faith...

do you know who
the Spartans were?

Wild stab.
A bunch of guys from Spart?

They were the fiercest warriors
known to ancient Greece.

And they lived in quarters very much
like these. Do you know why?

Because a true fighter
needs nothing else.

I'm going to be very hard
on you. Faith.

I will not brook insolence
or laziness.

And I will not allow blunders
like last night's attack.

You will probably hate me
a great deal of the time.

You think?

But I will make you
a better slayer.

and that will keep you alive.

You have to trust
that I am right.

God only knows what Mr. Giles
has been filling your head with.

Giles is OK.

His methods are
unfathomable to me.

I find him entirely confounding.

But that is not important. Let him
have his games and secret meetings.

What meetings?

Oh. I don't know. Something
with Buffy and her friends.

Oh. Right.

I guess that
doesn't include me.

And why does he let her socialize
so much? It hardly seems...

No matter.

Would you like to do
some training?

Training?

As in kicking and punching
and stabbing?

Yes. That's the idea.

I'm your girl.

[School Bell Rigs]

Hey.

Hey.

So on a scale of
one to a million.

how much are you
hating me right now?

Zero.

You were scared. You kept
a secret. You know?

It's OK.
Secrets aren't bad.

They're normal.
Better than normal.

They're good.
Secrets are good.

Must be a reason why
we keep them. Right?

Yeah. I guess.

So. Are you going to
The Bronze tonight. Or...

are you gonna sneak away
for a not-so-secret rendezvous

with Angel?

None of the above.

I'm gonna try and kill
this Lagos guy.

Peace offering to Giles.

Well. Angel has
the glove now. Right?

Yep. But Lagos
doesn't know that.

I figure sooner or later he's
bound to show up at that crypt

Iooking for it.

Ah. But instead he finds Buffy
in a not-so-good mood.

That's my brilliant plan.

You look pissed.

Rough day.

Tell me about it.

Rather just shoot.

Don't think I don't know
what you and your pals

were talking about
behind my back today.

[Strikes Ball]

Yeah? And what was that?

More about this glove deal
than you're saying.

The Glove of Myhnegon? Right.

How'd you like a hit
of some real news:

Angel's still alive.

[Strikes Ball]

The vampire.

Back in town.
Saw him myself.

Toting the popular
and famous glove.

Angel.

[Strikes Ball]

Guy like that.
with that kind of glove...

could kill a whole
mess of people.

Said the same thing
to Buffy myself.

Weird how she didn't
seem to care.

Buffy knew he was alive.

I can't believe her.

She says he's clean.

Well. I say we can't
afford to find out.

I say I deal with this
problem right now.

I say I slay.

Can I come?

You wanted to see me.
Mr. Giles?

Yes. I do apologize
for bringing you in

at this late hour.

Please. A good watcher must be awake
and alert at all hours.

Would you like some tea?

God. Yes. Please.

I'm completely knackered.

I spent the afternoon
training with Faith.

She doesn't lack for energy.

She's your first slayer.
I take it?

If you're questioning
my qualifications...

No. I'm not.

I have the utmost respect
for your methods...

in my own American way.

I also have the glove.

Not actually on me.
but I believe it's safe.

It's in a mansion
on Crawford Street.

A friend of Buffy's
is keeping it there.

We must get to it.

Immediately.

Hide it before
someone else finds it.

Or better still. Destroy it.

Destroy it?

I... I didn't think it
could be done either. But...

It involves transforming fire
into living flame

and immolating the glove.

It's complex. But...

I believe I have all
the necessary materials.

Well. I must say. Mr. Giles...

good show.

Good show indeed.

Um. Not to downplay
my own slaying abilities.

which in some circles
are considered formidable.

but shouldn't Faith be here?

I tried calling.
but no one was home.

Look. If you're feeling
any demon-o-phobia. Please...

splitting is
totally an option.

You're not the one
in trouble with Giles.

That's true.

How long do you think
he can stay angry at me. Anyway?

The emotional Marathon Man?

Yeah. I can't really blame him.

It's weird. Though.

Now that my secret...

Angel...
it's all out in the open...

I feel better.

Well. Sure you do.
This big burden's been lifted.

Keeping secrets
is a lot of work.

One could hypothetically
imagine.

You have no idea.

None whatsoever.

But... can I ask you a question?

When you were with Angel
and nobody knew about it.

did that make it feel.
you know. Sexier somehow?

Not really.

It's too much pressure.

After a while. It even
makes the fun parts...

not so fun.

Oh.

What makes you think all this
secret stuff is sexy. Anyway?

Nothing.
I'm just wondering.

Gotta keep asking
the big old questions

when you're blessed with this girl's
thirst for knowledge and...

OK. There's something
I have to tell you.

What?

OK. This will make me
feel better. Right?

You know. I always consider
myself a good person...

floss. Do my homework.
never cheat.

But lately. And please
don't judge me on this.

but I want you to be the first
to know that. That...

there's a demon behind you.

Ooohh!

[Growling]

Aaah!

Don't...

Huuarhhh!

Hyah! Hyah!

Ooh!

Now we're talking.

Hah!

Yes!

Sorry about that.

So. What were you saying?

Oh. I...

I opened my S.A.T. test
booklet 5 minutes early.

Just doesn't seem
important now. Does it?

Your secret's safe with me.

Come on.

Let's go bring Giles
some happiness.

Good old Sunnydale Library.

Fully equipped with reference
books. File cards...

and weapons.

Beauty.

I call crossbow.

You got it.

All right. Ready to go?

That I am.

[Moan]

Wait.

What?

Oh. My God. It's Giles!

Giles. Can you hear me?

What the hell happened?

Gee. Let me guess.

Stop. Hold it.
Just think a minute.

Yeah. I'm thinking. Thinking
Buffy's ex-meat did this.

It's not Angel's style.

The guy's a demon.
How much more proof do you need?

Bite marks would be nice.

Yeah. I have a medical emergency.
Sunnydale High.

Screw this waiting crap.

Faith. If we leave.
Giles could die.

Yeah. And he's going to have
a whole lot of company.

unless I do something permanent.

- Wait!
- For what?

You to grow a pair?

You handle the baby-sit.
and I'm gonna kill Angel.

Damn it!

[Speaks Latin]

Giles is gonna be psyched that
we showed up stuffy old Mrs. Post.

Oh. My God.

Sunnydale Medical...

What happened? Giles.

Blunt object head trauma.

Notify E. R...
we're bringing him in.

What happened?

No time for this.

Wait... Buffy. You must...

must destroy the glove.

You want him to live?
Get out of the way.

Use... living flame...

Paramedic: Move!

What happened?

Your boyfriend's
not as cured as you thought.

What makes you think that Angel
had anything to do with this?

We saw what you saw.

So you just assume?

I didn't. Faith did.

What did you tell her?

Only what everyone knows.

She's a big girl.
Came to her own conclusions.

How much of a head start
does she have?

10 minutes.

Go through Giles' research.

Figure out how to destroy
the glove.

Shut up and help me.

What do you want?

Gwen Post.
Mr. Giles sent me.

What for?

To help you destroy the glove.

Is that the living flame?

Yes.

Look. I'm sorry to be so abrupt.

but Lagos is on his way here now.

If you're performing
the ritual incorrectly.

it will only make
the glove more powerful.

All right.

Good. Where is the glove?

It's in the trunk.

That's what I love
about this town.

Everyone's so helpful.

Bugger!

OK...

that hurt.

But it was supposed to kill you.

If you'd been human.
it would have.

But...

I believe this is your poison.

Aagh!

Ooahh!

Mrs. Post!

I can't believe how much
I'm gonna kill you.

You're not getting that glove.

You wanna bet?

Aah!

Oof!

What?

Xander:
Think we got it?

Well. It's either the catalyst
for living flame

or just some really
smelly sand.

We'll have to test this.

I'll double-check.

What?

I know what the glove does.

There's no time to test this.

I can't let you do it. Faith.

You're confused. Twinkie.
Let me clear you up.

Vampire. Slayer.
Dead vampire.

There's a lot that you don't
understand.

Mrs. Post: Faith...

she doesn't know.
She's blinded by love.

Faith. No.

Trust me.

Trust me.

Faith. We can figure this out...

Augh!

Ooh!

Ugh!

Aah!

Aah!

Unh!

Ugh!

Augh!

The glove!
It's in the trunk.

We'll get it.

Help Faith.

Aaagh!

What are you...
Stop! Guys. Listen!

Aagh!

Finally.

[Speaks Gaelic]

What's going on?

Faith. A word of advice.

You're an idiot.

[Speaks Gaelic]

[Speaks Gaelic]

[Speaks Gaelic]

Can you draw her fire?

You bet I can.

Go do it.

[Speaks Gaelic]

There's nothing you can
do to me now.

I have the glove.

With the glove comes the power.

I'm getting that.

[Screaming]

Cordelia:
So there's no more glove thingy?

Xander: No. Little living flame.
little mesquite...

Gone for good.

Sounds like we
missed a lot of fun.

Then we're telling it wrong.

What do you think Buffy
and Angel are gonna do?

Boy. Do I don't know.

Well. He saved me
from a horrible flamey death.

That sort of makes me
like him again.

Well. As long as she and Angel
don't get pelvic.

we'll be OK. I guess.

What are you guys
talking about?

Oddly enough.
your boyfriend. Again.

He's not my boyfriend.

Really. Truly. He's...

I don't know.

Are we cool?

Yeah.

Just seeing the two of you kissing
after everything that happened.

I leaned toward the postal.

But I trust you.

I don't.
Just for the record.

Let me guess.

Gwendolyn Post.
not a watcher.

Yes. She was.

She was kicked out by the Council
a couple of years ago

for misuses of dark power.

They swear there was a memo.

Well. I better go.
Little more damage control.

The whole Angel
thing is so weird.

Yes. Well. We'll have to see
how that unfolds. Won't we?

Man on TV:
Yes. Sir?

Second Man: Police officers.
My name's Friday...

[Knock On Door]

Come in.

Hey.

Called the police
just a little while ago.

Talked to a man down there.

I didn't get his name. Though.

The place looks nice.

Yeah. It's real Spartan.

Man on TV: Can you show us
where they broke in. Please?

How are you?

Five by five.

I'll interpret that as good.

Look. Gwendolyn Post...

whoever she may be.
had us all fooled.

Even Giles.

Yeah. Well. You can't trust people.

I should've learned that by now.

I realize this
is gonna sound funny

coming from someone that just spent
a lot of time kicking your face...

but you can trust me.

Is that right?

I know I kept secrets.

but I didn't have a choice.

I'm on your side.

I'm on my side.
and that's enough.

Not always.

Is that it?

Yeah. I guess.

All right.
Well. Then. I'll see you.

Buffy?

Yeah?

Nothing.

Grrr! Argh!