Buffy the Vampire Slayer (1996–2003): Season 3, Episode 17 - Enemies - full transcript

As Faith attempts to seduce Angel and steal his soul, the Mayor summons a dark-magic demon to finish the job.

Previously on
Buffy the vampire slayer...

I'm faith.

I'm gonna go out
on a limb

and say there's a
new slayer in town.

Gee, if doing violence
to vampires upsets you,

I think you're
in the wrong line of work.

Yeah, or maybe you like
it a little too much.

Faith, no!

You killed a man.
I don't care.

She's unstable, Buffy.

Guess that means
you have a job opening.



Well.

Well.

That was... Very...

Artistic.

Yeah.

It wasn't what
I expected.

I've never
actually seen...

Well, from the title,

I thought it
was about food.

Well, there was food.

Right. Th-the scene
with the... Food.

So, feel like getting
some hot chocolate

or some cold shower?

I'm sorry.



I wanted to take you out
somewhere fun.

It's been a long time since
I've been to the movies.

They've changed.

A little scary.

And a little not,
which is also scary.

I'm sorry.

I just don't like getting
you worked up like that.

We can't actually do
any of those things.

You'd lose your soul,

and besides, I don't
even own a kimono.

Buffy, you don't have
to worry about me.

I just don't like
to rub your nose in it.

Suddenly wondering where
that expression comes from.

Look, I don't need to see
movies to get worked up.

Just being around you
does that just fine.

It doesn't mean that
I'm gonna lose control,

or that I'm gonna be
frustrated around you.

It feels nice just to feel.

It doesn't drive you
crazy when we're close?

Watch this.

See?

Safe as houses.

Check out
the lust bunnies.

Patrol?

Council has you back
on active duty?

Finally. They want
us down by Mercer.

OK.

Good night.

I'll see you soon.

Don't worry, big guy.

Just keeping her warm
for you.

I gotta tell you, b.

The willpower thing?
Nice job.

Thanks. What?

The "close but no cigar"
deal with angel.

I don't know if I could
handle, you know,

the way you're
not handling it.

Faith, when it comes to angel,
do me a favor. Duck!

Ow! What are you, nuts?

Going around
punching people?

People?

So what, I'm a demon.
That makes it OK?

Hold it! Whoa!

Stake me now

and you'll never find out
what I got for you.

Huh? Think about it.

Demon seeks slayers.
Highly unusual?

Talk fast.

How'd you like
to get your hands

on the books of ascension,
huh?

Never heard of them.

Books of ascension...
Very powerful works,

and I'm not talking
about the prose.

They deal
with some dark stuff,

and the mayor,
he would hate it

if somebody got ahold of them
before he... well, you know.

Don't know.
Before he what?

Hey, hey, read 'em
and weep.

That's all I got to say.

Tomorrow I get the books.

Meet me here,
and if the price is right,

well, I give the books
to you.

Not really looking
to trade with a demon.

And if this were still
a barter economy,

that would be a problem.
I want cash, Princess.

5 large for the whole set.

So you can buy...
I'm guessing here...

Some skin care
products?

Plane ticket out
of the hellmouth

before it's adios,
slayer loco.

So, 5 g's?
What do you say?

I think "die, fiend,"
sums it up,

wouldn't you say?

Oh, let him go.

I don't think he falls into the
deadly threat to humanity category.

A demon's a demon.

I'd like to know more about
these books of ascension.

Anything that would pin the
mayor down would be great.

Yeah... It'd be great.

And what exactly did
this demon look like?

Demonic.

Ah. And you say he has

the books of ascension,
or will soon,

and he was, what,
willing to sell them?

That's what I said.

Hmm.

You know what I wish?

I wish you'd pull
your hair back.

I know, I know, fashion
isn't exactly my thing,

but gosh darn it, you know,
you've got such a nice face.

I can't understand
why you hide it.

Yeah. Sure.

Whatever.

It's just a matter
of time

before this demon guy's
gonna spill.

Then Buffy
and the super friends...

You worry too much
for a girl your age.

That's unnecessary stress.

Luckily, I've got
just the thing.

There you go.

Now, first you load up
on calcium,

then find this demon,
kill the heck out of him,

and bring the books to me.

And if Buffy gets
to him first?

Oh, well, frankly, I don't
like to think about that.

I like good, positive,
up thoughts.

If you fail me in that way,

well, you know, replacing Mr.
Trick was chore enough.

Oh, come on, don't worry.
Drink up.

There's nothing uncool about
healthy teeth and bones.

And you say
this demon wanted cash.

That's very unusual.

Demons after money.

Whatever happened to the
still-beating heart of a virgin?

No one has any
standards anymore.

Well, he said the books
were worth the price.

What's this ascension mean?

I'm not sure.

No, not really a common term
in demonology.

Ooh, ooh!
The Merenshtadt text!

I think in the section
on genocide,

they mention ascension.

Well, we have a winner.

And more importantly,
2 losers.

Where did you find
that volume?

In the top of
your book cabinet

with the stuff you
try to keep hidden.

Hidden? Are there
any engravings

I should know about?

Frolicking nymphs
of some kind?

No. Just magic secrets Giles
doesn't think I'm ready for.

Giles: Um... ah, yes.
Yes, here we are.

There's a reference here

to the journal
of Desmond Kane,

pastor of a town
called Sharpsville.

"May 26, 1723.

"Tomorrow is
the ascension.

God help us all."

It was the last
anyone heard.

Of Kane?

Of Sharpsville.

The town more
or less disappeared.

So ascension possibly
not a love-in.

I think you should meet
with this demon, Buffy.

Yeah? Anybody got $5,000?

I have something
important to ask you.

Xander:
Important?

Let's start calculating
those odds, people.

What are you doing
Friday night?

Uh... Uh...

As always, my sacred duty
as a watcher

prevents me from... Why?

I have a paper
to write for English,

and you're English,
so I thought... What?

Is it so wrong
to be getting

an insider's
perspective?

I study best in a good
restaurant...

Around eightish?
Think it over?

And on the day the words "flimsy
excuse" were redefined,

we stood in awe
and watched.

Wesley: Right.

Books of ascension,
mayor, slaughter...

Tell you what.

Why don't we try
to find this demon

sooner rather
than later,

perhaps persuade him to lend
us the books free of charge?

I think faith might be useful
in that persuasion part.

I imagine so.

Where is faith, anyway?

Hey, slayer.

I wasn't expecting company.

Give me a minute,

and I'll have the place
tidied up for you.

You got the books?

Well, that depends.

You got my money?

You're tough
in negotiations,

and I respect that.

Check 'em out.

Now, that is quality
merchandise.

That's worth
5 grand, easy.

Books of ascension.

Mm-hmm. Original
editions and everything.

Great condition.

OK, it's a little worn
on one spine,

some slight foxing,
but otherwise perfect.

Now, the 5 grand, it's,
you know, negotiable.

I don't like to haggle.

Faith.

Angel...

I got nowhere else to go.

Look, I hate asking for help,
but I'm asking,

'cause I'm in trouble,
like the real bad kind.

It's OK.

No, it's a couple county lines
over from OK, believe me.

I believe you.
Look, just talk.

Come on.

Start from the beginning.

Mind if I skip past

the "mom never
loved me" part

and get right to it?

I'm scaring myself.

I know the feeling.

That's why I came
to you.

I don't wanna get
all 12-steppy,

but remember
when you told me

that killing people'd make me
feel like some kind of god?

I think I just
came down to earth.

It's not human, if that's
what you're thinking,

not that that makes
me feel any better

or this guy
any less dead.

Faith, you need help.
You can't do this alone.

I know. For real now,
I'm scared...

Scared of what I am,
what I'm turning into...

Cold-blooded, straight-up
killer... Like you.

Not like me.
I didn't have a choice,

but you do.

Look, you can stop this.

Believe me, I don't wanna end up
the way everybody said I would...

Dead or alone or a loser.

You don't have to.

I don't know.

Maybe it's too late
for me.

It's not.

Angel, I'm so scared.

It's all right. Shh.
It's OK.

Whoa.

Whoa, faith. I...

Look, I can be here
for you,

but not like that,
all right?

I'm with Buffy.

Buffy, yeah.

I didn't mean it like that.

Maybe I did,
but I wouldn't press it.

You love her, don't you?

I love her.

Good for you.

The two of you,
you're lucky.

We friends?

We're friends.

Then I'm lucky, too.

I better go.

Where?

I need to cool down...

Spend some time alone.

Don't worry about me.

You've been a big help. Just
knowing somebody cares.

Hey, I know I shouldn't
be asking this, but...

Do you think if things
were different,

that things between you and
me'd be different, too?

We'll never know.

Right.

How could we?

Take care of yourself.

Faith: Lifetime
of practice.

Faith: It's not like
I wasn't trying, OK?

There's no need
to convince me.

I'm sure you gave it
your level best.

I just don't understand what
that boy could be thinking.

Try Buffy summers,

like in a big, fat,
one-track way.

Hey, come on!
Don't be discouraged.

You're a bright,
young, energetic girl

with a whole life ahead
of her,

and I won't tolerate
brooding.

So you couldn't give him that
one moment of true happiness.

I was thinking more along the
lines of a long weekend, but OK.

And he spurned your advances.
So be it.

There's more than
one way to skin a cat,

and I happen to know
that's factually true.

We wanna take
angel's soul away.

If we can't do it
by giving him happiness,

well, by golly,
we'll just have to do it

in the most painful way
imaginable.

Find anything?

A six-course banquet
of nothing

with a scoop of sod all
as a palette cleanser.

I've had no better luck.

There must be something about
this ascension somewhere.

Perhaps I should
contact the council,

maybe run
a search through...

No, I don't...

It should be I that...

The council isn't entirely aware
that I'm letting you work for me.

Uh... With me.

I don't think they'd be very happy at the
idea of the two of us collaborating.

Well, I wasn't about to burst into
glorious song about it myself.

Why don't you call them?

I think the most
expedient plan

would be to find these books
of ascension themselves.

Buffy, you and faith must
find this demon, and soon.

I'll go back to the scene,
see if I can track him.

Wait for faith.

That could be hours.

The girl makes Godot
look punctual.

I'll just go myself.

Buffy, this is a job
for the both of you.

This demon could be anywhere.

If these books are as important as
he says, he has good reason to hide.

Finding him's going
to be extremely difficult.

Found your demon.

Fashion tip, Wes.

Mouth looks better
closed.

Got the address.

I beat it out of Willie
the snitch personally.

You beat up Willie?

Sure.

Well, actually
let's just say

I applied some pressure,
or more accurately,

that I asked politely,
and then...

OK, I bribed him.

How much?

28 bucks.
Does the council reimburse

for that kind of stuff?

Did you get a receipt?

Damn!

I know this.

It's down
by the bus station.

Not the nicest part
of town.

Again, see?
No standards.

Any self-respecting
demon

should be living in a pit
of filth or a nice crypt.

I'll remember
to mention that.

Mention what?

Where we going,
girlfriend?

Actually, I can handle
this one solo.

Why should you get
to have all the fun?

Share, share,
that's fair, right?

Right. Found our demon.

Oh. Well, let's go
look him up.

Is it me, or did it just
get really cold in here?

Faith, careful.

Right.

Missed you last night.

Yeah, I was patrolling.

No shortage of scum you gotta
watch in sunnydale, right?

So I've heard.

Looks like somebody
got here first.

Bettin' they got the books, too.
Some hit.

This wasn't just a hit.

This is somebody's idea
of a party.

Maybe the guy
put up a fight.

We gotta get going.

Come on. Nothing
we can do here now.

You coming?

Mint?

Didn't think so.

Well, scheduling a man
of your talents

is quite the chore,
I'll tell you.

Between the chanting
and the sacrifice,

my golf game is shot.

But here... You are.

You know why
I've summoned you.

Can you do it?

Need anything from me?

You're not much of a
people person, are you?

You have risked great danger
in calling on me.

The deadliest magics
are needed

to rob this creature
of its soul.

Big job, all right.

And so it shall be done.

Oh, that's just swell.

Listen, are you sure
you don't want any?

'Cause they're
low-calorie. Heh heh.

OK.

Are you OK?

You seem a little
on edge.

Is there anything
that's wrong?

It's nothing.

It's nothing.

All right, all right.

Stop with the third degree.

It's faith.

What about her?

I went to angel's
last night,

and faith was there.

They looked sort of...

Intimate.

No way. I know what
you're thinking,

and no way!

You're right.
Faith would never do that.

Faith would
totally do that.

Faith was built
to do that.

She's the
"do that" girl.

Comfort, remember?
Comfort here.

I mean, please.

Does angel come up to faith's
standards for a guy?

Let's see.
Is he breathing?

Actually, no.

But, Buffy, angel...

There's no way he
would ever do that.

You're the only thing
in the world to him.

Sometimes I wonder.

Angel and faith
have a lot in common...

And there's so much
he doesn't tell me.

But it's so clear,

the way he feels
about you.

Buffy, I, too,
know the love

of a taciturn man,

and you have to look
at their actions.

I was.

Well, what did he say?

Say? You mean when I straightforwardly
asked him what was going on?

So you bailed?

I couldn't.
I mean, not then...

Hey, enough.

Stop with the crazy.
Go talk to angel.

But I just...

No. Go. I give you
leave to go.

Thank you.

Faith.

Hey.

Sorry to bust in uninvited.

What do you want?

Look, I'm not so good
at apologies,

mostly 'cause I think
the world's out to screw me,

so I'm generally
more owed than owing.

But I've been thinking
about last night,

and I want you to know
I'm really sorry.

It's all right, faith.

No, it's not all right.

Yeah, I was freaked.
I needed somebody,

but you're with Buffy.
I should know better.

OK.

You don't trust me.

It's not that.

Hey, no problem.
Join the club.

Look, faith...

Look, I know what you're
going through, all right?

I know how hard it can be.

It's important that you have
somebody who's been there, OK,

who understands what
you're going through...

And I wanna trust you.

Chump.

Yaa shaytann, inna nafsak
laa tatba'uk ba'd.

Yaa rufukayl Al-'azim,
shattit nafsah fii anhaa'i...

Faith!

I wanted to do this
the old-fashioned way,

but hey, your loss.

I got some tricks
Buffy don't know yet.

You don't have to do this.

I know, but it's fun.

Now relax.
It'll all be over soon.

No!

Yaa ruuh idhhabii!
Yaa nafs idhhabii!

Utrukii ayyaah wa-'trukiih
nahruuman wa-najisan!

Thanks... So much.

It's good to have the taste
of a slayer back in my mouth.

It's like cigarettes,
you know?

Just when I thought
I'd quit.

No, really.
Don't get up.

Ohh... It's good to be
back in sunnydale.

Nice climate...

Plenty to eat...

No tortured humanity
to hold me down.

But you know
what bothers me?

You don't seem to be getting
the big picture here, faith.

Now, I don't know why
you turned me,

but let me tell ya...

I'm just glad you did.

I got my reasons.

Let me guess. You summoned back
the true angelus because...

You need a new boy toy.

Sorry.
Doesn't work that way.

You wanna be smart,
you listen to me.

Funny thing about vampires,
faith...

We don't establish meaningful
dialogue with slayers.

Not how Buffy tells it.

Heh heh heh. I should've known
you'd like it on top.

You wanna listen,
or you wanna die?

Heh heh. As long as you're there,
I mostly want you to wriggle.

But I'm listening.

Last time you got like this,

Buffy kicked your ass
all the way back to hell.

Do you wanna
do better this time?

Still listening.

Good boy.

Now, all you gotta do
is play nice and call truce,

and I'll hook you up with
the real power in this town.

Interested?

Very.

Then get ready
to meet the new boss.

Wesley: Our enemy has us
at a disadvantage.

We seem consistently
to be one step behind him.

Now he has
the books of ascension.

We must take
definitive action.

You have
the greatest voice.

Have you ever thought about
doing books on tape?

Way to focus, c.C.

Yes, let's try
to stay on track.

We need everyone working together here.
Where's angel?

I don't know.

I went to the mansion,
but he wasn't there.

And faith?

She's missing, too.

Which means nothing.
Two unconnected events.

What should we do?

Buffy, I think you should try to
retrieve the books of ascension.

Check out
the mayor's office.

But be damn careful. Do
not confront the mayor.

We don't know
a thing about him.

I'll go home
and stock up on weapons.

Slip into something a little
more break-and-enterish.

Right. Willow,

how far did you get
with the mayor's files?

Excuse me.

I believe Wesley
is running this meeting.

It's, uh, it's quite
all right. Willow?

It's all bad news.

By the time I got through
the encryptions,

the files were empty.

I guess
he saw me coming.

What about
the hall of records?

Go to the source.

Good idea. There must be
information on the mayor there.

Wesley, why don't you
take the group

and start looking?

Right.

I'm in
Wesley's group.

There is
just the one group.

Yes, and I am in it.

Anyone mind
if I skip the trip?

I'm gonna cruise town,
keep my ear to the ground.

And I think 5's a crowd.

It really is.

I'll drive.

They liked your plan.

Anyone finds anything,
check in with me.

Be careful.

So... Can I keep him?

Let's just take things
step by step for a moment.

Now, then, angelus...
May I call you angel?

Well, actually, I'm thinking
more along the lines

of you calling me master.

Ahh. You know, angelus,
attitude may get you attention,

but courtesy wins respect.

Heh heh. I am the one responsible
for your "new" attitude.

That's why I'm here.

No trouble with the transition?
No side effects?

Hmm. Had a soul. Now I'm free.

That's terrific.
Poetic, too.

Not that I read much poetry.

Except for those little ones
in the reader's digest.

Some are quite catchy.

Hey, I don't mean
to rush things here,

but are you trying to get
to some kind of a point?

Heh. Kids today.
Rush, rush, rush.

The point, angel, is you're a very
powerful young man. Good for faith.

And there just may be a future
for you here in sunnydale.

I see you're admiring
my letter opener.

Actually, I was thinking of stabbing
you through the heart with it.

Please do.

Nice shot.

You see, I'm what
you might call...

Impervious.

Can't be killed or harmed
in any way.

And that's just
a cornerstone

in my plans for this
great town of ours.

Hmm. Can't be killed,

but you don't like germs.

Ew. Awful things.
Unsanitary.

But my question is, now that
faith has brought you back,

what are your intentions?

Well, gee, sir,

I thought I'd find that slayer
that's giving you so much trouble

and torture, maim,
and kill her.

Fine.

It's nice to see you're not
one of those slacker types

running around town today.

Heh heh heh heh.

Torture Buffy.

Killing her's fine,
just make it a slow one.

My favorite kind.

Wonderful. Wonderful.

We don't want a replacement
slayer anytime soon.

They can't all turn out
like my girl faith. Heh heh.

Have fun.

Let's do it.

Uh... Try to have her
home by 11:00.

She's not
a little girl anymore.

"I love when
you talk, Wesley.

I love when
you sing, Wesley."

Can you say the words
"jail bait," Wesley?

Limey bastard.

Hey, guys.
Man, where ya been?

You gotta find Buffy. She's going
to her place and stock up...

That guy
just bugs me.

Faith, angel.

Hi, Joyce.
Nice to see ya.

Is Buffy home?

Upstairs.

Please tell me it's not
some vampire thing.

The only vampire here
is me, Joyce.

Say... You change
your hair?

Highlights.

It's nice.

Knock, knock.

Where have you guys been?

Lookin' for you. Good thing
we found you before you left.

We got the books.

They're at the mansion.

We'd take 'em
to Giles ourselves,

but I think strength in numbers
is the way to go. Come on.

Let me get those for you.

OK, let's get the books
someplace safe.

Where are they?

Actually... We have a slight
change in plan, buff.

"Buff"?

You just called...

What's the matter
with you?

Nothing. Matter of fact,

I haven't felt this good
in a long time.

Angel?

You know, I never
properly thanked you

for sending me to hell.

No...

Yeah, and
I'm just wondering.

Where do I start?
Card? Fruit basket, huh?

Evisceration?
No.

Yeah, I know
what you're thinking.

Maybe there's still some
good deep down inside of me

that remembers
and loves you,

if only you could
reach me.

Then again,
we have reality.

I will kill you
before I let you touch me.

Faith, we need to get
out of here. Now.

Speak for yourself, b.

Me? I like it here.

One thing I learned
about Buffy...

She's so cute
when she's sleeping.

Hmm.

Hey, I know a way to make investigating
the mayor even more boring.

On second thought,
no, I don't.

Hey... Whoa.

Whoa. Big "hey, whoa."
Guys, check this out.

Wow. Like father, like son.

How about like exact same
guy like exact same guy?

Mayor Wilkins
is over 100 years old.

He's not human.

I, uh, hate to
spoil the mood,

but this is so much
worse than you think.

Xander,
what happened to you?

You know how some people
hate to say I told you so?

Not me. I told you so.

Angel's back,
in the really bad sense.

And, um, I told you so.

Angelus has turned?

Xander, this is terribly serious.
Are you sure?

Gee, let me think.

Kinda hard to tell.

Last thing I remember
is his fist.

We must contact Giles
immediately.

Good thinkin'.

Let's waste time
with a lively debate.

Leave Buffy alone,
see how dead she gets.

Slow down, Xander.
This isn't Wesley's fault.

Actually, it is.

Faith was
your responsibility.

Guess who's angel's
new playmate.

Faith and angel? Together?

Imagine
the possibilities.

Mornin', sleepyhead.

You know what
I just can't believe?

All of our time together,
we never tried chains.

Well, can't dwell
on the past.

Especially with the
future we have ahead.

Bondage looks good
on you, b.

The outfit's all wrong,
but hey...

You don't know
what you're doing.

Really? Weird, 'cause something
about all this just feels so right.

Maybe it's one of those
unhappy childhood things.

See, when I was a kid, I used
to beg my mom for a dog.

Didn't matter what kind.

I just wanted, you know,
something to love.

A dog's all I wanted.

Well, that and toys.

But mom was so busy,
you know,

enjoying the drinking and
passing out parts of life

that I never really
got what I wanted.

Until now.

Faith, listen to me
very closely.

Angel's a killer.

When he's done with me,
he'll turn on you.

She's right.

I probably will.

Yeah?

Huh.

Guess we'll just have to keep
you around a while, then.

Before we get started,

if you're a screamer,
feel free.

Why, faith?

What's in it for you?

What isn't?

You know, I come to
sunnydale, I'm a slayer,

I do my job kicking ass
better than anyone.

What do I hear about
everywhere I go?

Buffy.

So I slay, I behave,

I do the good little
girl routine,

and who does everybody
thank? Buffy.

That's not my fault.

Everyone always asks,

"why can't you
be more like Buffy?"

But did anyone ever ask if
you could be more like me?

I know I didn't.

You get the watcher,

you get the mom, you get
the little Scooby gang.

What do I get?
Jack squat.

This was supposed
to be my town.

Faith, listen to me.

Why? So you can impart
some special Buffy wisdom?

That it?

Do you think you're
better than me? Do you?

Say it. You think
you're better than me.

I am.

Always have been.

Um, maybe you
didn't notice.

Angel's with me.

And how did you
get him, faith?

Magic?

You cast some sort of spell?

Because in the real world,

angel would never touch you,
and we both know it.

You had to tie me up
to beat me.

There's a word for people
like you, faith.

Loser.

Uh-huh. You're just trying to
make me mad so I'll kill you.

But I'm too smart
for that.

Stick around.

For what? Your boss's
lame ascension?

Like I couldn't stop it.

You can't.

I will.

Keep dreaming. No one
can stop the ascension.

Mayor's got it wired, b.

He built this town
for demons to feed on,

and come graduation day,
he's gettin' paid.

I'll be sittin'
at his right hand.

Assuming he has hands
after the transformation.

I'm not too clear
on that part.

And all your little
lame-ass friends

are gonna be
kibbles and bits.

Think about that when your
boyfriend's cutting into you.

I never knew you had
so much rage in you.

What can I say?

I'm the world's best actor.

Second best.

Graduation day.

You think
we missed anything?

I think we know
everything she knows.

May I say something?

Psych.

You played me.
You played me!

What are you gonna do, b?
Kill me?

You become me.

You're not ready
for that.

Yet.

Are you OK?

The task is finished.

Yes. Thank you
for coming to me

and for that rather effective
light show you put on.

This restores the balance
between us, Rupert Giles.

My debt to you
is now repaid in full.

Do not call upon me again.

I shan't.

Peace with you.

And with you.

His debt to you is repaid?
What did you do?

I introduced him
to his wife.

Well, I, for one,
protest.

You've pitted slayer
against slayer

in a dangerous charade that
could've gotten them both killed.

Without informing me!

I'm telling the council.

I think you should.

We have a rogue slayer
on our hands.

I can't think of anything
more dangerous.

At least now we know.

And we know a little bit
more about the ascension.

Graduation day.

There's a big,
scary un-fun.

At least angel's
not bad, though.

That's good, right?

Yes. I feel so much better

knowing that he broke my face
in the "good" way.

It's a "good" bruise.

He was only acting, Xander.

It was just an act.

Mayor: Well, you win some,
you lose some.

From where I'm sitting, it's
batting average that counts.

So you lost
some friends.

I wouldn't exactly
call them friends.

What are you worried
about? Chin up.

You don't see me looking
disappointed, do ya?

Heck no. You know why?

Because I know you'll
always have me, faith.

I'm the best, the most important
friend you'll ever have.

Besides, once
the ascension starts,

the "in crowd" you're so
concerned about? Whoo!

They'll be lucky if there's enough
of them left to fill a pothole.

Promise.

Still unhappy?

Hmm.

Okeydoke.

I've got two words

that are gonna make
all the pain go away...

Miniature... Golf.

How you doin'?

Been better.

Not hard to believe.

You were a real soldier
last night, Buffy.

That's me.

One of the troops.

I know how hard
it was for you.

I really doubt that.

If there's anything I can
do to make it better...

Look, I know you only
did what I asked,

and we got what we wanted.

I never wanted it
to go that far.

I know that.

It's not even
a question of that.

It's just after...

I need a little bit
of a break.

Please?

You still my girl?

Always.

Grr! Arrgh!