Breaking Bad (2008–2013): Season 1, Episode 3 - ...And the Bag's in the River - full transcript
Walt is struggling to decide if it's best to kill Krazy-8 or let him go.
[♪♪♪]
[GRUNTS]
[COUGHS]
WALT:
Let's break it down.
Hydrogen.
What does that give us?
By mole,
we're looking at 63 percent.
Sixty-three? Wow.
Mm-hm.
That is a big bite.
My next step's gotta be oxygen.
Oxygen, 26 percent.
Twenty-six.
There you have your water.
Carbon, 9 percent.
Carbon, 9.
For a total of 98 percent.
Right.
WOMAN:
Nitrogen, 1.25 percent.
WALTER:
One-point-two-five.
WOMAN:
That brings you
to 99 and a quarter.
Which only leaves you
with the trace elements
down where
the magic happens.
Oh, wait a minute. What about
calcium? Calcium's not a trace.
WALTER:
Got a whole skeleton
to account for.
WOMAN: You would think, right?
WALTER: Right.
WOMAN:
Calcium.
Calcium's only 0.25 percent.
What? That low?
Uh-huh. Mm-hm.
Seriously?
Damn, I never
would've thought that.
Okay, so where does iron fit in?
Iron.
WOMAN:
Wow, okay,
0.00004 percent.
What? You can't have
hemoglobin without iron.
Apparently, it don't take much.
No doubt. Go figure.
WALTER:
Ah, sodium.
WOMAN: Sodium, 0.04.
[COUGHING]
WOMAN:
Phosphorus, 0.19.
WALTER:
Point-one-nine.
There we go.
So the whole thing
adds up to...
99.888042 percent.
We are 0.111958 percent
shy.
Supposedly that's everything.
Yeah?
Mm-hm.
I don't know,
it just...
It just...
It seems like something's
missing, doesn't it?
WALTER:
There's got to be more
to a human being than that.
[COUGHING]
[FLUSHES]
[♪♪♪]
I hate these shoes.
Shoes make me look like
I should be changing bedpans,
like I should be
squeaking around
bringing soup to some
disgusting old person,
then take the bus home
to my 16 cats.
Then why are you
wearing them?
I like the support. My arches
happen to be extremely arch-y.
[PHONE RINGING]
Yo, what's up?
Hey, can you call me, like,
in two minutes?
Thanks, bye.
I gotta go take this.
Ooh. Female?
Louis.
Not like it's any
of your business, though.
Just be quick about it.
No.
Oh, and, um,
please don't say, "Yo."
You can't know
how much I hate that.
You missed a spot, right there.
Should you be up
on that ladder?
You're more than welcome
to take over for me up here.
I don't see why you don't get
Walt to do it.
Yeah,
there's an idea.
So um, I'm, uh, I'm working
on this new short story
and there's this stoner
character in it
and I'm trying to... um...
Well, you know, actually,
let me back up.
Um, you, uh,
you smoked your fair share
of pot in college,
didn't you?
I mean,
you at least tried it.
Come on.
I perhaps tried it. Why?
Do you remember it
having an effect on your mood?
Like,
changing it in any major way?
It made me more serious.
Really?
Because I mostly remember
it made me lightheaded,
that's about it.
I was just
wondering if...
If it maybe could, um...
Um, you know,
it's just a character thing
I'm stuck on. Never mind.
Walter, Jr.'s on pot?
What? No.
No. No.
What would make you even...?
Where's he getting it from?
Marie.
Seriously. Is it this Louis person?
What are you gonna do
about this?
Marie,
you need to look me in the eye.
I am strictly asking
about a story that I'm writing,
that's all.
Right hand to God,
Walter Jr. Is not on pot,
certainly not as far
as I know.
Not as far as you know?
Marie.
[♪♪♪]
[TOILET FLUSHES]
Hey, look at me.
Hey, turn around
and look at me.
This... This here.
I wouldn't do this
to my worst enemy.
[COUGHING]
This is degrading.
I'm sorry.
You hope I'll make it easy
and just drop dead, don't you?
But I won't.
So either kill me,
or let me go.
[COUGHING]
You don't have it in you,
Walter.
[COUGHING]
How do you know my name?
Jesse.
He told Emilio and me.
I came by
to sell your meth.
So, what, did you
threaten him, huh?
Did you beat it out of him?
Not even close.
What else did he tell you?
Pretty much everything
he could think of.
You were his high-school
teacher.
One time you taught
about carbon dioxide
by making grape soda
in class.
You have a son
who's retarded,
or in a wheelchair
or something.
It shouldn't come across
as some news flash.
That partner of yours,
he's got a big mouth.
Walter,
I don't know what you think
you're doing here,
but trust me,
this line of work
doesn't suit you.
So I should just let you go,
then?
Just unlock you
and adiós, huh?
I don't see
what real choice you have.
If it's between that
and cold-blooded murder.
Besides...
your real problem's
sitting upstairs.
[♪♪♪]
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
Occupied.
Hey, yo, I'm trying to pinch one
off in here.
Just give me some privacy,
would you?
Okay.
What the hell, man?
What are you doing, man?
You asshole. What...?
You told him my name.
Says who, him?
My name, where I work.
You told him about my son.
Hey, don't touch me.
Damn junkie.
No, give me that. That's mine.
This is going down the toilet.
Watch it go.
No, that's worth 40 grand,
you stupid shit.
It's worth nothing
when you smoke it all.
Get off the toilet.
Get off the toilet!
No.
Get off the toilet.
Stop it.
[TOILET FLUSHING]
No. No way.
[COUGHING]
No.
No, no, no.
Jesse, where the hell
do you think you're going?
Back off, man. Jesus.
We've got work to do.
No, no.
You... You got work to do.
I did my part.
You mean that obscenity I spent
the last two hours cleaning up?
That is your contribution?
Kiss my pink ass, man.
I didn't ask for any of this.
How am I supposed
to live here now, huh?
My whole house smells like
toe cheese and dry cleaning.
Because you didn't follow
my instructions.
Oh, well, heil Hitler,
bitch.
And let me tell you
something else.
We flipped a coin,
okay?
You and me. You and me.
Coin flip is sacred.
Your job is waiting for you
in that basement,
as per the coin.
Fucking do it, already.
That's what she said.
Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah, I think
we have some of those.
Yeah, you'll have
to try them on.
Hello?
Seven and a half, maybe.
I don't know.
Excuse me.
Do you have these in black?
Uh-uh.
Anyways,
so like I was saying,
I went to the party the other
night. Yeah, Tony was there.
[PHONE RINGING]
Whatever.
Hey, where have you been?
I called you two hours ago.
HANK:
Sorry, baby, I'm, uh,
kind of busy here. What's up?
Well, kind of a lot, actually,
and it's a delicate subject.
So I need you to focus, and...
Hey, sit down! Sit down!
Damn it, Hank.
I'm sorry, babe, I'm just
in the middle of something here.
Get...
Sit down! Sit your ass down,
comprende? You too, sit down!
[SPEAKING SPANISH]
Shit.
I'm back, babe. What's up?
Walter Jr.
Yeah, what about him?
Marijuana. He's smoking it.
Bullshit.
Excuse me, his own mother
seems to think so.
Skyler told you that?
She inferred it.
She inferred it, huh?
She strongly inferred it.
Like, "Doctor, my friend
suffers from
erectile dysfunction."
Please, come on.
All right.
I want you to talk to him.
Walt should talk to him.
Hell, Skyler, better yet.
She'll kick his butt
up and down the block.
I think it ought to be you.
You know, tell him
some horror stories.
Maybe show him
some autopsy pictures.
An autopsy of a pot overdose?
Come on.
I don't know, baby,
it's just that, you know,
I figure his dad should be the
one doing this thing,
don't you think?
Hank, he respects you.
Yeah, all right.
Well, listen, I mean,
I'll swing by their place
after work.
Good. Scare him straight.
Yeah, yeah.
Hey, where's my sugar?
Hm. Muah.
SALESWOMAN:
Excuse me, ma'am.
Ma'am, you need to be wearing
footies before you try those on.
I'm extremely clean.
Yeah, well,
I'd really appreciate it.
Hey, sorry about that.
Yeah, I'll check.
SALESWOMAN:
You know, I hid a pair for you
last week, gray ones.
My manager found them and we
put them back on the floor.
I know.
[SASHA DOBSON'S
"WITHOUT YOU" PLAYING]
[AMBULANCE SIREN WAILING]
[CAR HORN HONKING]
Hey.
I'm going.
HANK: What do you think?
WALT JR: About what?
This look like
a nice place?
No, not really.
Think you'd like
to live here?
No.
Sure about that?
Yeah, pretty sure.
I thought we were going to
Cold Stone Creamery.
Yeah, yeah, well,
we took a little detour.
Figure we'll come
over here and check
out how the other half lives.
This here is what we call
the Crystal Palace.
You know who lives
in the palace? Meth-heads.
Nasty, skeevy meth-heads
who'd sell their grandma's
coochie for a hit.
[CHUCKLES]
Oh, you think that's funny?
That's funny, huh? Yeah.
Let me tell you something.
Every one of these
miserable wastes of skin
got started how?
Hm?
How do you think they started?
I don't know.
What do you think it was
they were all doing
before they graduated
to shooting meth
in their dicks?
A gateway drug.
That's what we call it.
Dollars to doughnuts,
and I shit you not,
that gateway drug was
marijuana, every time.
You understand?
Um, yeah.
So why are you
telling me this?
Because I love you,
you little bastard.
And, hey, I was young once,
you know.
The world's a messed-up place,
you know.
You know, just this, uh,
one time, you know...
Hey! Hey! Hey, you!
Yeah, you, princess.
Get over here.
[CAR HORN HONKING]
Hey, don't make me
get out of the car.
Check this out.
HANK:
See what
I'm talking about.
Hey, I ain't holding, okay?
Did I say you could open your mouth?
And hands off the car.
Other side. Go around the other
side, talk to my friend here.
What's your name,
sweetheart?
Wendy.
HANK: Wendy, huh?
How much you charge
for a windy, Wendy?
I ain't doing him, he's a kid.
Jesus, was that my question?
Don't think so hard,
it's gonna hurt your brain.
Are you on the pipe
or on the needle?
Nothing. Neither.
Yeah, yeah.
Show us your teeth, huh?
Come on, Wendy,
let's see those pearly whites.
Oh, God. See that?
Pipe, definitely.
Bigtime, bigtime on the pipe.
You got something
you wanna ask Wendy?
Um, no, not really.
You ever smoke anything else,
Wendy?
Sausages don't count.
[LAUGHS]
Ahem. Seriously,
tell my friend here
how you got started.
Probably used to be, what,
like a Girl Scout
or probably sang
in the church choir?
What are you, like,
handicapped?
He broke his leg
playing football.
He's a QB.
Got an arm like a howitzer.
So tell me, Wendy,
you smoke pot?
Why, you got some?
All right, hoof it, get lost.
Get out of here.
Hey, fair warning,
next time I'm gonna bust you.
So, what do you think?
Cool.
JESSE:
Shut the door.
Shut the door.
Lock it.
Lock it, lock it.
Who the hell was that?
Cop and some
football player
messing with me.
JESSE:
They ask about me, huh?
No,
I think they just wanted pot.
JESSE:
Right there.
HOOKER:
Shit, left my root beer.
[♪♪♪]
[BEEPING]
SKYLER: Hello?
Hey, sweetie, it's me.
Listen, I'm so sorry.
The time, it just, ha...
It just... It completely
got away from me.
I'm just, ha... uh...
My fault, my fault.
Bogdan just kept me here late,
you know, doing some inventory,
and I, um, l... I should've just...
You know, you're right.
L-I gotta learn to say,
you know, "No."
But, um...
Sky? You there?
You're at the car wash?
Yeah.
I seriously doubt that,
since you quit two weeks ago.
I called Bogdan,
looking for you.
Quite an earful he gave me.
Listen...
Listen, I'll come home
and we'll talk about it.
I don't think so, Walt.
Honey...
Wherever you are,
why don't you just
stay there tonight?
Skyler? Skyler?
Skyler?
KRAZY-8:
Walter?
Hello?
Hey, I'm kind of hungry
down here.
[♪♪♪]
[COUGHING]
[WALTER COUGHING]
[COUGHING]
Oh.
Come on.
[COUGHING]
Damn.
I didn't think
you were coming back.
[GROANS]
[COUGHING]
How long was I out?
Ten, 15 minutes?
I've never seen someone
knock themselves out
just by coughing.
You breathe in the same shit
you used on me?
I've got lung cancer.
[COUGHING]
I'll go make you
another sandwich.
WALTER:
It's safe.
There's no poison.
Because that would be
the way to do it,
if you're gonna do it.
I suppose it would.
I mean,
you being a chemist
and all.
So that name...
Krazy-8.
Do I really
have to call you that?
I mean, no offense,
but don't you have a real name?
Domingo.
That's "Sunday," right?
I'd rather call you that,
if you don't mind.
Whatever.
I can't say
I ever liked it much.
[COUGHS]
So, Domingo,
you from around town here
or someplace else?
Hey, Walter?
You getting to know me
is not gonna make it easier
for you to kill me.
Not that I mind, you understand?
You know, you keep telling me
that I don't have it in me.
Well, maybe.
But maybe not.
I sure as hell am looking for
any reason not to.
I mean, any good reason at all.
Sell me.
Tell me what it is.
I guess I'd start off by
promising that if you let me go
I won't come after you,
that you'd be safe.
I guess I'd say
what happened between us
never happened.
And what's best for both parties
is we forget all about it.
But you know that
anybody in my situation
would make promises
like that.
And, in my case,
they happen to be true.
You'll never know for sure.
So, what else can I tell you?
I don't know.
But you've gotta convince me.
And you're going nowhere
until you do.
Hey, yeah. Yeah.
I'm from here in town,
man.
ABQ, born and bred.
Never left.
Studied Business Administration
over at UNM,
got my degree.
Really?
Does that, uh, come in handy
in the drug trade?
It doesn't hurt.
I was gonna study
music originally.
Maybe even try out
for Oberlin and Berklee.
My pops talked me
out of it.
Said there was
no money in it
unless I wind up
some bullshit rock star,
and I didn't have
a snowball chance of that.
What does your dad do?
He owns Tampico Furniture
over on Menaul.
Wait a minute,
I know that place.
Wait a minute. That's...
That's that... That, uh...
They used to have those...
Those late-night...
The stupid commercials.
That they had, yeah.
Yeah, that's him. Been doing
them for over 30 years.
Wait a minute.
How did it go? It was, uh...
Wait, wait, wait. It was...
[SINGING]
Don't let shopping
Strain your brain-o
Just sing this short refrain-o
Our furniture is bueno
Our furniture is bueno
Tampico is the name-o
Tampico is the name-o
[BOTH LAUGHING]
[COUGHING]
Pretty moronic.
But what can you do?
Well, it did tend
to stick in your head.
Did you write that? Being
the musician in the family.
Hell, no, man.
It was my crazy uncle Alex.
He sings it at bars,
trying to pick up on women.
His mind, it's like saying,
"Hey, I wrote
'Stairway to Heaven."'
Yeah, but at
Tampico Furniture, I...
I think when my son
was born
that we bought
his bassinet there.
Uh-uh.
We don't sell bassinets there.
It's more of a specialty item.
We did use to sell cribs.
A crib, then, okay. A crib.
Yeah. No, I remember that.
In fact, I remember
recognizing your dad
from those commercials.
Although he wasn't
anywhere near
as friendly in real life.
Yeah. No shit.
Did he, uh, try selling you
that extended warranty?
Yeah, he probably did.
And I was probably
dumb enough to buy it.
Yeah, that was his big thing.
You ask him
for a glass of water,
he'd tell you you need
an extended warranty on the ice.
Did you work there too?
Only my whole life.
Up until the day I said,
"Fuck you," and quit.
So, uh...
16 years ago,
how old would you have been?
If it was after school,
trust me, I was there.
Might have even helped
ring you up.
You and your extended
warranty on the crib.
[COUGHING]
Small world.
It is.
The paths we take, huh?
[MUTTERS INDISTINCTLY]
Jesse know
you've got cancer?
No one but you.
Not your family?
No.
Why not?
Not a conversation that I'm even
remotely ready to have.
That's why you're cooking meth?
You wanna leave money
for your family.
Hell, I mean,
I'll write you a check right now
if you let me go.
Like I said, Walter,
this line of work
doesn't suit you.
Get out before it's too late.
I don't know what to do.
Yeah.
You do.
I'll get the key.
[♪♪♪]
No.
Oh, no, no, no.
No. No. No, don't do this.
Don't do this.
Why are you doing this?
Why are you doing this?
[DOOR CREAKING]
[GRUNTS]
You're doing the right thing,
Walter.
Yeah?
Do you wanna?
[COUGHING]
So you're not angry?
What do you mean?
Angry at you?
No.
Live and let live, man.
That's very understanding.
Whatever, man.
I just wanna go home.
Yeah.
Me too.
Unlock me, Walter.
The moment I do...
are you gonna stick me
with that broken piece of plate?
[BOTH GRUNTING]
[YELLING]
[WALTER GRUNTING]
I'm sorry, I'm sorry,
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, I'm so sorry,
I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry.
[♪♪♪]
JESSE:
Hello?
Anybody down here?
[♪♪♪]
[CHATTERING]
WOMAN:
Everybody,
I need you all to take your seats.
Settle down, please. Thank you.
I understand
that Mr. White is feeling
a little under the weather
this morning.
So you folks
are going to have to be
making do with me today.
And we are going to be watching
a very interesting video
on carbon
Very important stuff.
GOMEZ:
So, what do you think?
HANK:
Ah, it's a cook site.
Gotta be.
Nobody came way the hell
out here just to buy.
Fire there could have started
by accident.
I don't think that was meant
to destroy evidence.
GOMEZ:
Got a couple of Dooley tracks
headed away, towards the road.
So, what, they're in
some kind of camper/lab?
They accidentally start a fire
and everybody FOs?
Yeah. Why not?
So why did that little
hair-gelled shit leave
his car?
Ay-yi-yi.
Gomey,
it's a culture in decline.
It's a rich
and vibrant culture.
It's a car that jumps
up and down.
What the hell?
You people used to be
conquistadors, for chrissake.
Smells like a Drakkar Noir
factory in here.
I already searched it.
HANK:
Yeah.
You're wasting your time.
Give it up.
If this here's a trap car,
it's gonna take more than your
dumb white ass to find it.
Oh, yeah? You are talking to
the trap-car master,
my friend.
I'm Rain Man counting
his toothpicks.
Yeah, you're like Rain Man.
Retarded.
[HANK LAUGHING]
HANK:
Yeah, baby.
[LAUGHING]
Hello, zippy.
Asshole.
Sort of looks like meth
but it's, uh,
it's too damn white.
You know what I'm thinking,
Gomey?
Yep.
Somebody croaked our snitch.
MAN:
Hey, agents.
You got something?
[♪♪♪]
WALTER:
I don't know. It just...
It just doesn't it seem like...
Something's missing?
What about the soul?
[CHUCKLES]
The soul.
There's nothing
but chemistry here.
[MOTOR WHIRRING LOUDLY]
Skyler?
There's something
I have to tell you.
[♪♪♪]
[GRUNTS]
[COUGHS]
WALT:
Let's break it down.
Hydrogen.
What does that give us?
By mole,
we're looking at 63 percent.
Sixty-three? Wow.
Mm-hm.
That is a big bite.
My next step's gotta be oxygen.
Oxygen, 26 percent.
Twenty-six.
There you have your water.
Carbon, 9 percent.
Carbon, 9.
For a total of 98 percent.
Right.
WOMAN:
Nitrogen, 1.25 percent.
WALTER:
One-point-two-five.
WOMAN:
That brings you
to 99 and a quarter.
Which only leaves you
with the trace elements
down where
the magic happens.
Oh, wait a minute. What about
calcium? Calcium's not a trace.
WALTER:
Got a whole skeleton
to account for.
WOMAN: You would think, right?
WALTER: Right.
WOMAN:
Calcium.
Calcium's only 0.25 percent.
What? That low?
Uh-huh. Mm-hm.
Seriously?
Damn, I never
would've thought that.
Okay, so where does iron fit in?
Iron.
WOMAN:
Wow, okay,
0.00004 percent.
What? You can't have
hemoglobin without iron.
Apparently, it don't take much.
No doubt. Go figure.
WALTER:
Ah, sodium.
WOMAN: Sodium, 0.04.
[COUGHING]
WOMAN:
Phosphorus, 0.19.
WALTER:
Point-one-nine.
There we go.
So the whole thing
adds up to...
99.888042 percent.
We are 0.111958 percent
shy.
Supposedly that's everything.
Yeah?
Mm-hm.
I don't know,
it just...
It just...
It seems like something's
missing, doesn't it?
WALTER:
There's got to be more
to a human being than that.
[COUGHING]
[FLUSHES]
[♪♪♪]
I hate these shoes.
Shoes make me look like
I should be changing bedpans,
like I should be
squeaking around
bringing soup to some
disgusting old person,
then take the bus home
to my 16 cats.
Then why are you
wearing them?
I like the support. My arches
happen to be extremely arch-y.
[PHONE RINGING]
Yo, what's up?
Hey, can you call me, like,
in two minutes?
Thanks, bye.
I gotta go take this.
Ooh. Female?
Louis.
Not like it's any
of your business, though.
Just be quick about it.
No.
Oh, and, um,
please don't say, "Yo."
You can't know
how much I hate that.
You missed a spot, right there.
Should you be up
on that ladder?
You're more than welcome
to take over for me up here.
I don't see why you don't get
Walt to do it.
Yeah,
there's an idea.
So um, I'm, uh, I'm working
on this new short story
and there's this stoner
character in it
and I'm trying to... um...
Well, you know, actually,
let me back up.
Um, you, uh,
you smoked your fair share
of pot in college,
didn't you?
I mean,
you at least tried it.
Come on.
I perhaps tried it. Why?
Do you remember it
having an effect on your mood?
Like,
changing it in any major way?
It made me more serious.
Really?
Because I mostly remember
it made me lightheaded,
that's about it.
I was just
wondering if...
If it maybe could, um...
Um, you know,
it's just a character thing
I'm stuck on. Never mind.
Walter, Jr.'s on pot?
What? No.
No. No.
What would make you even...?
Where's he getting it from?
Marie.
Seriously. Is it this Louis person?
What are you gonna do
about this?
Marie,
you need to look me in the eye.
I am strictly asking
about a story that I'm writing,
that's all.
Right hand to God,
Walter Jr. Is not on pot,
certainly not as far
as I know.
Not as far as you know?
Marie.
[♪♪♪]
[TOILET FLUSHES]
Hey, look at me.
Hey, turn around
and look at me.
This... This here.
I wouldn't do this
to my worst enemy.
[COUGHING]
This is degrading.
I'm sorry.
You hope I'll make it easy
and just drop dead, don't you?
But I won't.
So either kill me,
or let me go.
[COUGHING]
You don't have it in you,
Walter.
[COUGHING]
How do you know my name?
Jesse.
He told Emilio and me.
I came by
to sell your meth.
So, what, did you
threaten him, huh?
Did you beat it out of him?
Not even close.
What else did he tell you?
Pretty much everything
he could think of.
You were his high-school
teacher.
One time you taught
about carbon dioxide
by making grape soda
in class.
You have a son
who's retarded,
or in a wheelchair
or something.
It shouldn't come across
as some news flash.
That partner of yours,
he's got a big mouth.
Walter,
I don't know what you think
you're doing here,
but trust me,
this line of work
doesn't suit you.
So I should just let you go,
then?
Just unlock you
and adiós, huh?
I don't see
what real choice you have.
If it's between that
and cold-blooded murder.
Besides...
your real problem's
sitting upstairs.
[♪♪♪]
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
Occupied.
Hey, yo, I'm trying to pinch one
off in here.
Just give me some privacy,
would you?
Okay.
What the hell, man?
What are you doing, man?
You asshole. What...?
You told him my name.
Says who, him?
My name, where I work.
You told him about my son.
Hey, don't touch me.
Damn junkie.
No, give me that. That's mine.
This is going down the toilet.
Watch it go.
No, that's worth 40 grand,
you stupid shit.
It's worth nothing
when you smoke it all.
Get off the toilet.
Get off the toilet!
No.
Get off the toilet.
Stop it.
[TOILET FLUSHING]
No. No way.
[COUGHING]
No.
No, no, no.
Jesse, where the hell
do you think you're going?
Back off, man. Jesus.
We've got work to do.
No, no.
You... You got work to do.
I did my part.
You mean that obscenity I spent
the last two hours cleaning up?
That is your contribution?
Kiss my pink ass, man.
I didn't ask for any of this.
How am I supposed
to live here now, huh?
My whole house smells like
toe cheese and dry cleaning.
Because you didn't follow
my instructions.
Oh, well, heil Hitler,
bitch.
And let me tell you
something else.
We flipped a coin,
okay?
You and me. You and me.
Coin flip is sacred.
Your job is waiting for you
in that basement,
as per the coin.
Fucking do it, already.
That's what she said.
Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah, I think
we have some of those.
Yeah, you'll have
to try them on.
Hello?
Seven and a half, maybe.
I don't know.
Excuse me.
Do you have these in black?
Uh-uh.
Anyways,
so like I was saying,
I went to the party the other
night. Yeah, Tony was there.
[PHONE RINGING]
Whatever.
Hey, where have you been?
I called you two hours ago.
HANK:
Sorry, baby, I'm, uh,
kind of busy here. What's up?
Well, kind of a lot, actually,
and it's a delicate subject.
So I need you to focus, and...
Hey, sit down! Sit down!
Damn it, Hank.
I'm sorry, babe, I'm just
in the middle of something here.
Get...
Sit down! Sit your ass down,
comprende? You too, sit down!
[SPEAKING SPANISH]
Shit.
I'm back, babe. What's up?
Walter Jr.
Yeah, what about him?
Marijuana. He's smoking it.
Bullshit.
Excuse me, his own mother
seems to think so.
Skyler told you that?
She inferred it.
She inferred it, huh?
She strongly inferred it.
Like, "Doctor, my friend
suffers from
erectile dysfunction."
Please, come on.
All right.
I want you to talk to him.
Walt should talk to him.
Hell, Skyler, better yet.
She'll kick his butt
up and down the block.
I think it ought to be you.
You know, tell him
some horror stories.
Maybe show him
some autopsy pictures.
An autopsy of a pot overdose?
Come on.
I don't know, baby,
it's just that, you know,
I figure his dad should be the
one doing this thing,
don't you think?
Hank, he respects you.
Yeah, all right.
Well, listen, I mean,
I'll swing by their place
after work.
Good. Scare him straight.
Yeah, yeah.
Hey, where's my sugar?
Hm. Muah.
SALESWOMAN:
Excuse me, ma'am.
Ma'am, you need to be wearing
footies before you try those on.
I'm extremely clean.
Yeah, well,
I'd really appreciate it.
Hey, sorry about that.
Yeah, I'll check.
SALESWOMAN:
You know, I hid a pair for you
last week, gray ones.
My manager found them and we
put them back on the floor.
I know.
[SASHA DOBSON'S
"WITHOUT YOU" PLAYING]
[AMBULANCE SIREN WAILING]
[CAR HORN HONKING]
Hey.
I'm going.
HANK: What do you think?
WALT JR: About what?
This look like
a nice place?
No, not really.
Think you'd like
to live here?
No.
Sure about that?
Yeah, pretty sure.
I thought we were going to
Cold Stone Creamery.
Yeah, yeah, well,
we took a little detour.
Figure we'll come
over here and check
out how the other half lives.
This here is what we call
the Crystal Palace.
You know who lives
in the palace? Meth-heads.
Nasty, skeevy meth-heads
who'd sell their grandma's
coochie for a hit.
[CHUCKLES]
Oh, you think that's funny?
That's funny, huh? Yeah.
Let me tell you something.
Every one of these
miserable wastes of skin
got started how?
Hm?
How do you think they started?
I don't know.
What do you think it was
they were all doing
before they graduated
to shooting meth
in their dicks?
A gateway drug.
That's what we call it.
Dollars to doughnuts,
and I shit you not,
that gateway drug was
marijuana, every time.
You understand?
Um, yeah.
So why are you
telling me this?
Because I love you,
you little bastard.
And, hey, I was young once,
you know.
The world's a messed-up place,
you know.
You know, just this, uh,
one time, you know...
Hey! Hey! Hey, you!
Yeah, you, princess.
Get over here.
[CAR HORN HONKING]
Hey, don't make me
get out of the car.
Check this out.
HANK:
See what
I'm talking about.
Hey, I ain't holding, okay?
Did I say you could open your mouth?
And hands off the car.
Other side. Go around the other
side, talk to my friend here.
What's your name,
sweetheart?
Wendy.
HANK: Wendy, huh?
How much you charge
for a windy, Wendy?
I ain't doing him, he's a kid.
Jesus, was that my question?
Don't think so hard,
it's gonna hurt your brain.
Are you on the pipe
or on the needle?
Nothing. Neither.
Yeah, yeah.
Show us your teeth, huh?
Come on, Wendy,
let's see those pearly whites.
Oh, God. See that?
Pipe, definitely.
Bigtime, bigtime on the pipe.
You got something
you wanna ask Wendy?
Um, no, not really.
You ever smoke anything else,
Wendy?
Sausages don't count.
[LAUGHS]
Ahem. Seriously,
tell my friend here
how you got started.
Probably used to be, what,
like a Girl Scout
or probably sang
in the church choir?
What are you, like,
handicapped?
He broke his leg
playing football.
He's a QB.
Got an arm like a howitzer.
So tell me, Wendy,
you smoke pot?
Why, you got some?
All right, hoof it, get lost.
Get out of here.
Hey, fair warning,
next time I'm gonna bust you.
So, what do you think?
Cool.
JESSE:
Shut the door.
Shut the door.
Lock it.
Lock it, lock it.
Who the hell was that?
Cop and some
football player
messing with me.
JESSE:
They ask about me, huh?
No,
I think they just wanted pot.
JESSE:
Right there.
HOOKER:
Shit, left my root beer.
[♪♪♪]
[BEEPING]
SKYLER: Hello?
Hey, sweetie, it's me.
Listen, I'm so sorry.
The time, it just, ha...
It just... It completely
got away from me.
I'm just, ha... uh...
My fault, my fault.
Bogdan just kept me here late,
you know, doing some inventory,
and I, um, l... I should've just...
You know, you're right.
L-I gotta learn to say,
you know, "No."
But, um...
Sky? You there?
You're at the car wash?
Yeah.
I seriously doubt that,
since you quit two weeks ago.
I called Bogdan,
looking for you.
Quite an earful he gave me.
Listen...
Listen, I'll come home
and we'll talk about it.
I don't think so, Walt.
Honey...
Wherever you are,
why don't you just
stay there tonight?
Skyler? Skyler?
Skyler?
KRAZY-8:
Walter?
Hello?
Hey, I'm kind of hungry
down here.
[♪♪♪]
[COUGHING]
[WALTER COUGHING]
[COUGHING]
Oh.
Come on.
[COUGHING]
Damn.
I didn't think
you were coming back.
[GROANS]
[COUGHING]
How long was I out?
Ten, 15 minutes?
I've never seen someone
knock themselves out
just by coughing.
You breathe in the same shit
you used on me?
I've got lung cancer.
[COUGHING]
I'll go make you
another sandwich.
WALTER:
It's safe.
There's no poison.
Because that would be
the way to do it,
if you're gonna do it.
I suppose it would.
I mean,
you being a chemist
and all.
So that name...
Krazy-8.
Do I really
have to call you that?
I mean, no offense,
but don't you have a real name?
Domingo.
That's "Sunday," right?
I'd rather call you that,
if you don't mind.
Whatever.
I can't say
I ever liked it much.
[COUGHS]
So, Domingo,
you from around town here
or someplace else?
Hey, Walter?
You getting to know me
is not gonna make it easier
for you to kill me.
Not that I mind, you understand?
You know, you keep telling me
that I don't have it in me.
Well, maybe.
But maybe not.
I sure as hell am looking for
any reason not to.
I mean, any good reason at all.
Sell me.
Tell me what it is.
I guess I'd start off by
promising that if you let me go
I won't come after you,
that you'd be safe.
I guess I'd say
what happened between us
never happened.
And what's best for both parties
is we forget all about it.
But you know that
anybody in my situation
would make promises
like that.
And, in my case,
they happen to be true.
You'll never know for sure.
So, what else can I tell you?
I don't know.
But you've gotta convince me.
And you're going nowhere
until you do.
Hey, yeah. Yeah.
I'm from here in town,
man.
ABQ, born and bred.
Never left.
Studied Business Administration
over at UNM,
got my degree.
Really?
Does that, uh, come in handy
in the drug trade?
It doesn't hurt.
I was gonna study
music originally.
Maybe even try out
for Oberlin and Berklee.
My pops talked me
out of it.
Said there was
no money in it
unless I wind up
some bullshit rock star,
and I didn't have
a snowball chance of that.
What does your dad do?
He owns Tampico Furniture
over on Menaul.
Wait a minute,
I know that place.
Wait a minute. That's...
That's that... That, uh...
They used to have those...
Those late-night...
The stupid commercials.
That they had, yeah.
Yeah, that's him. Been doing
them for over 30 years.
Wait a minute.
How did it go? It was, uh...
Wait, wait, wait. It was...
[SINGING]
Don't let shopping
Strain your brain-o
Just sing this short refrain-o
Our furniture is bueno
Our furniture is bueno
Tampico is the name-o
Tampico is the name-o
[BOTH LAUGHING]
[COUGHING]
Pretty moronic.
But what can you do?
Well, it did tend
to stick in your head.
Did you write that? Being
the musician in the family.
Hell, no, man.
It was my crazy uncle Alex.
He sings it at bars,
trying to pick up on women.
His mind, it's like saying,
"Hey, I wrote
'Stairway to Heaven."'
Yeah, but at
Tampico Furniture, I...
I think when my son
was born
that we bought
his bassinet there.
Uh-uh.
We don't sell bassinets there.
It's more of a specialty item.
We did use to sell cribs.
A crib, then, okay. A crib.
Yeah. No, I remember that.
In fact, I remember
recognizing your dad
from those commercials.
Although he wasn't
anywhere near
as friendly in real life.
Yeah. No shit.
Did he, uh, try selling you
that extended warranty?
Yeah, he probably did.
And I was probably
dumb enough to buy it.
Yeah, that was his big thing.
You ask him
for a glass of water,
he'd tell you you need
an extended warranty on the ice.
Did you work there too?
Only my whole life.
Up until the day I said,
"Fuck you," and quit.
So, uh...
16 years ago,
how old would you have been?
If it was after school,
trust me, I was there.
Might have even helped
ring you up.
You and your extended
warranty on the crib.
[COUGHING]
Small world.
It is.
The paths we take, huh?
[MUTTERS INDISTINCTLY]
Jesse know
you've got cancer?
No one but you.
Not your family?
No.
Why not?
Not a conversation that I'm even
remotely ready to have.
That's why you're cooking meth?
You wanna leave money
for your family.
Hell, I mean,
I'll write you a check right now
if you let me go.
Like I said, Walter,
this line of work
doesn't suit you.
Get out before it's too late.
I don't know what to do.
Yeah.
You do.
I'll get the key.
[♪♪♪]
No.
Oh, no, no, no.
No. No. No, don't do this.
Don't do this.
Why are you doing this?
Why are you doing this?
[DOOR CREAKING]
[GRUNTS]
You're doing the right thing,
Walter.
Yeah?
Do you wanna?
[COUGHING]
So you're not angry?
What do you mean?
Angry at you?
No.
Live and let live, man.
That's very understanding.
Whatever, man.
I just wanna go home.
Yeah.
Me too.
Unlock me, Walter.
The moment I do...
are you gonna stick me
with that broken piece of plate?
[BOTH GRUNTING]
[YELLING]
[WALTER GRUNTING]
I'm sorry, I'm sorry,
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, I'm so sorry,
I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry.
[♪♪♪]
JESSE:
Hello?
Anybody down here?
[♪♪♪]
[CHATTERING]
WOMAN:
Everybody,
I need you all to take your seats.
Settle down, please. Thank you.
I understand
that Mr. White is feeling
a little under the weather
this morning.
So you folks
are going to have to be
making do with me today.
And we are going to be watching
a very interesting video
on carbon
Very important stuff.
GOMEZ:
So, what do you think?
HANK:
Ah, it's a cook site.
Gotta be.
Nobody came way the hell
out here just to buy.
Fire there could have started
by accident.
I don't think that was meant
to destroy evidence.
GOMEZ:
Got a couple of Dooley tracks
headed away, towards the road.
So, what, they're in
some kind of camper/lab?
They accidentally start a fire
and everybody FOs?
Yeah. Why not?
So why did that little
hair-gelled shit leave
his car?
Ay-yi-yi.
Gomey,
it's a culture in decline.
It's a rich
and vibrant culture.
It's a car that jumps
up and down.
What the hell?
You people used to be
conquistadors, for chrissake.
Smells like a Drakkar Noir
factory in here.
I already searched it.
HANK:
Yeah.
You're wasting your time.
Give it up.
If this here's a trap car,
it's gonna take more than your
dumb white ass to find it.
Oh, yeah? You are talking to
the trap-car master,
my friend.
I'm Rain Man counting
his toothpicks.
Yeah, you're like Rain Man.
Retarded.
[HANK LAUGHING]
HANK:
Yeah, baby.
[LAUGHING]
Hello, zippy.
Asshole.
Sort of looks like meth
but it's, uh,
it's too damn white.
You know what I'm thinking,
Gomey?
Yep.
Somebody croaked our snitch.
MAN:
Hey, agents.
You got something?
[♪♪♪]
WALTER:
I don't know. It just...
It just doesn't it seem like...
Something's missing?
What about the soul?
[CHUCKLES]
The soul.
There's nothing
but chemistry here.
[MOTOR WHIRRING LOUDLY]
Skyler?
There's something
I have to tell you.
[♪♪♪]