Boris (2007–2010): Season 1, Episode 5 - A + B = C - full transcript

Doctor Cane, Lopez has arrived!

Lopez

Do you like "Lebeche"?

"Lebeche" is a production of the channel

and it's a good product

Lopez, "Lebeche" is very bad

I get it

So tell me Lopez, why my daughter

that she is a very intelligent person

does not miss a chapter of "Lebeche"?
eleven
00:00:44,091 --> 00:00:45,562
Now let me work

when you have understood, call!



Ok, Doctor!

And this you call me order, Giovanni!
fifteen
00:01:48,084 --> 00:01:50,476
What? The coffee maker is not good
on the nightstand?

If you didn't want to be noticed

you shouldn't have worn that hat

Yes, you speak
look what haircut you have!

So you know what I told him?
twenty
00:02:00,178 --> 00:02:01,916
Ask your grandmother for the recipe for the soup ...
twenty-one
00:02:03,881 --> 00:02:05,901
I know you have those damn bastards!

I know what it was!
2. 3
00:02:12,961 --> 00:02:14,446
The great comedy!

[HOUSE OF THE SCRIPT WORKERS]

Yes, yes, I understand, okay, yes!

Very bad news

was Lopez

They want the comic subplot

I call my agent!

I charge double for comedy!



Martellone

Martellone, what is your role, Martellone?

The notary
3. 4
00:02:49,698 --> 00:02:51,345
They have decided that he has to be a comic character

Funny? How can a notary be a comic character?

He is the character that at all
he is closer to death!

Let's go

Have you ever seen Martellone?

Yes, I have seen it once in theater!

AND? It's fun?

What a joke!

He has come out like this

What a joke!

People had fun
Four. Five
00:03:26,801 --> 00:03:30,567
I love it ... "What a joke!"

What a ...

We only needed Martellone!

Also I do not understand what there is

of fun in "The eyes of the heart"
fifty
00:03:41,819 --> 00:03:43,934
rapes, betrayals, one who copulates with another

and then he finds out who is his sister

it's anything but comical!

Channel orders

Have the sentences also changed?

Let me see

The notary, if I am not mistaken,

just to sign the agreement!

No, no, the phrases are the same

only now he's a comic character

You see? The scriptwriters have put it
right in the dimension

During the act of sale,
despite the seriousness of his profession

the notary turns out
immediately very nice

They don't feel like doing anything these, huh!

Yes, hope that the worst has been done here

look look,

I have it! The comic scene I have found!

She is great

Stanis enters

and improvise

I can not believe it

This totally ruins our day

Stanis who improvises no!

He improvises something funny and funny!

Call Lopez!

[WAGE SCRIPT WORKERS PER WEEK 3500e EACH ONE]

Improvise? Like a fish in water!

Hey, I don't need that ... I would need more hugs

It is as little Italian as a thing, Wilma!

But I have said:you make me clear,
let it be noticed, at the head

"Stanis La Rochelle text collaboration!"

I do not want it! Give it to someone else!

As?

Come on, please, I'm with you
talking about my heart!

I'm telling you about my heart

No, I no longer do free charity, is that clear?

I do not want it

In South Africa? With that heat?

I don't love her Mauro, she doesn't want to say anything
give it to someone!

Ask for a million euros

I said:and ask him for a million euros!

Who cares! But do you hear me when I speak?

Goodbye Wilma!

What the hell of answers do you give me?

You do me the courtesy, please, go ask Arianna

or to the production or to someone

a secluded place for Stanis

where i can concentrate

above all far from the people who shout on the phone!

And what does it mean? You are my man please!

Hey, I'm working, we'll talk later!

What a bore this!

What a pain in the ass!

I tell him that I need it and what do I do?

he gives me a gift!

So you haven't understood

I don't need your gift, I need you!

What has he given you?

Also the least original gift there is

typical redneck

That is?

A smart!

Do you know what I told him?

Give it to the first person to pass
that damn smart!

What area does your boyfriend live in?

Yes, I leave the pizza here in case you need it!

You know what? "The eyes of the heart 2"

is different from "The eyes of the heart 1"

Oh yeah?
-Yes

You see? So far we have dug into the human soul

We have dug into the heart of things you see

but we have not been able
to smile about all this

Once in a while people want to laugh too!

And you called Martellone?

Hi, I'm Biascica, delighted!

I've seen her at the Margherita theater

Martellone, delighted, thank you!

how is that?

What a joke!
-What a joke!

Here it is!

Master, it is an honor to work with you!

Don't overdo it, come on!

True true!
-How are you?

Well thank goodness I can't complain!

Caffe

Oh, how delicious!

a nice coffee!

Well then we toast

We toast ... with coffee, okay!

To "The eyes of the heart 2"!

in the eyes ... there is a nice affinity!
-Yeah

Cin cin!

I come down from home and I realize that the car

I had not taken it!

What a joke !!

One more time (again)

Listens!

What a joke!

Are you sure?

Sure, I wouldn't say something like that without being sure

It's wonderful news, right?

I know, I know, but I'm afraid
but I already feel

older, I suddenly feel different

I am not afraid, I am not afraid, I am not afraid ...

Hello It's Me

what if i told you i'm pregnant?

No

Yes

Ah ah

OK

agree

then I'll call you later

Bye

well, what does it say?

He says we make a calendar!

The first 9 months with the belly
and the rest with the child!

He was my agent!

Stanis, the production wanted to know

if this seemed good to you to concentrate

Yes, you can tell the production that it's alright

Hey, I want to hear
a little country music

can you get it for me?

fast

Sepia, sepia, come here?

Sit down

Hey, you know what it means to make people laugh?

Forget about your problems and messes

and be forced to make laugh

I think it is difficult

No, it is very simple

Because comedy is mathematical, huh!

That is?

Sepia, in the USA they apply some equations

to make people laugh, do you understand?

They use computer programs, look at me!

If A + b = C, C-B = A!

This is the comedy, understood?

Ah

Yes, but you will tell me, this can be done by everyone!

And here you are quite wrong, Sepia!

Because you need the right vibration!

Is it clear?

Yes
-Perfect

Now you get me country music

You call Mascellone and tell the production

that I need half an hour in here

only with him to tune in, right?

I go

go away

Ah, Stanis, his name is Martellone!

Yes, go!

Let's see, with sympathy and friendship Nando Martellone, eh?

I break when you say "What a joke!"

Thank you

but I don't know how to say it well as you say it

Do it a little

Let's see, it must be like the snorting of a horse

What a joke!

Great! Wait ... what a joke!

Forgive me, Mr. Martellone, Stanis asks yes

can reach it in the caravan

Yes I'm going!

Forgive me! Thank you

Host, that's good, I'm breaking!

For me the comic scene has to be done

differently than the others

with more rhythm, acting and camera movements

and then also the assembly

Of course, of course

Ah, I was told that Stanis
has freedom of improvisation

Yes Yes

Have you already rehearsed?

No not yet! Arianna do me a favor

go call Stanis and tell him to come over

So we rehearse the scene, eh, come on!

He asked for a half hour with Martellone

to "tune in"!

What?

He said so! Tune in!

Ok then we make the foreground
Corinna laughs

Okay, total Corinna is ready!

No, when I went to call her she was crying!

It's not possible!

Corinna,we are ready!

And I don't, okay?

Hey, you just have to make a very simple frame

you just have to laugh

is the reverse shot of the funny scene

that between Stanis and Martellone

Hey, I know what it is, just now I don't feel like laughing

so you record something else

Corinna, once in a while you could throw a cable

that always complicate things

Arianna, you are a bitch!

You are a bitch!

I don't want this!

How do you see it?

Look, very simple

You are the notary

I'm going to sign, okay?

Before signing

you and I stare into each other's eyes

AND?

I am already laughing, you know?

The potential it has,
I mean we stare at each other and go

yes yes, by God,

the important thing is to understand where it is

the conflict between the two characters, right?

Let's see, I'm the notary who wants to make you sign

and you, of course, are reticent

you if you want to tease me

and I lose control

it's funny in the sense that you tease me

and i make silly faces

No, no, it's fun because you put
silly faces makes you laugh

I don't understand how I make you laugh at this thing that you do

I find that math is missing

as an inexact equation

You have understood?

No

Come

What happens?

She is pregnant!

What do you say?

Already this morning when I saw her I thought

this one has a weird face
I think she is pregnant

then she confirmed it to me

No, come on, this is very serious!

You are Roman, right?
-Yes

So if you say something in roman
with the limp R it makes you laugh

for example "signature GioRgio"

GioRgio signs!

this is to die of laughter

I know but

Hello

How do you plan to do this scene?

We first thought of a small

pun that but we have ruled out!

I tell him "notice, I don't sign"

Notary, notice-I don't sign

Ah!

but this is not the famous to do, we discard it!

so you can see at what level we are!

Because honestly the scene does not seem to me

that lends itself a lot for comical movements

why?

Let's see, I have to make him sign the hesitation
-See, already this ...

yes, but there are no comic exits
-But why?

No, look, I understand you perfectly

Do not know where...

no guys i don't understand how
this little scene can be fun

It can not

Sirs, excuse me, but this is a potentially scene

very funny, but a lot

Gentlemen, it doesn't depend on what we say

it depends on how we say it

It depends on how we say it

Do not be me Italians that today we devastate

Come on Mascellone

Martellone! [Lit. Big hammer!]

We can find something else

Take advantage of this great body that you have, right?

I do not know what I can do?

Can I fart ?!

I dont know!

But I want to keep working

In fact nobody prevents you

and with the character how do I?

Also Doctor Giulia gets pregnant

Of course!

But pregnant doctors are never seen

Okay, what does it matter that they are not seen

the doctors also get pregnant

it is something biological

And for the scene of the shooting?

318
00:16:14,605 ​​--> 00:16:15,668
there are the doubles!

Hello

I'm almost ready!

No, do not worry

How are you?

Well a little like that

We talked about it?

Yes

I leave you alone

Let's see

I was wondering if we would have
to replace Corinna

as the protagonist of our series,

who would you think of?

Simple, I wouldn't think about it

since Corinna is the only reason

why we do all this!

And it can't be changed

But if she had to go, just in case

Put the case, she finds another job or gets pregnant

Why do you tell me "she gets pregnant"?
3. 4. 5
00:17:17,330 --> 00:17:18,257
Are you pregnant?

No, she is not pregnant, she said so!

No, you're hiding something from me, look how important this is

It is not unsolvable but yes
Corinna has become pregnant

you have to tell me now

We are ready!

Yes, yes, let's go!

We had a lot of fun

come on come on come on

makes me die laughing!

What do you know?

Nothing, I said so, calm down

is that...

she's pregnant, Diego!

This bitch got pregnant!

That she goes, it's not me!

I mean, you can't plan everything,
right Arianna?

I ask you because I would like to control everything

but you can't, things come like this

it is born

is that I would like that Mauro would be closer to me

Hey i think we should
be sure 1000 by 1000

Does it bother you to do the test again?

I really haven't done it yet!

What?

I mean, haven't you done the pregnancy test yet?

I don't need to do the test, I mean

a woman feels those things inside

She was dizzy, the other day I passed out in the gym

and I have hit my head and in this period

i feel so thoughtful

I'm ready for the scene

So are you ready?

I dress on a plate!

Renè says we're ready

Yeah you gotta get fast
a pregnancy test

Where?

Fast!

I go

Gentlemen, put on the belt that laughs a lot

Let's see guys, remind you that the notary

you have to turn out immediately
a very nice character, okay?

Is it true that Corinna is pregnant?

Who told you that?

I have heard it over there

No, no, it's not true!

Come on come on let's go

Delighted, Martellone!

Motor!

Congratulations, I have seen you in "Pinzimonio", you're great

Thank you!

The eyes of the heart 2

and action!

I beg you, sign

I do not know

I don't know, I have to think about it

please, it is very important that you do

I know

I have to think about it

here is the pen

I do not know i do not know

Mr. Notary, I am tormented

do not complicate the situation too much

no, no, I'm still quite tormented, Mr. Notary

I have understood, but firm!

I have to think

But you too ... sign!

Do you know what I'll do, Mr. Notary?

But that it does?

It's not possible

I let a coin choose!

No
-Yes

A simple little coin with all my destiny

in the hands of a coin, yeah!

And how?

Listen to me well, if it comes out expensive I won't sign,
If the cross comes out I will sign

Have we understood each other?

If it comes out expensive, I don't sign
-Nerd!

If tails ... I will sign!

Now I'm going to have a heart attack!

No, notary, calm down, it's simple

it is 50 and 50 notary

if tails, sign!

if it comes out expensive I will not sign

What has come out?

It is cross!

It is cross!

What a joke!

Stop

Martellone

what are you laughing at?

Martellone, we said nothing that is vulgar!

I beg your pardon, I know

but it was served to me on a silver platter!

No no it was good

but Renè let us free

we are fine-tuning,
we are trying to understand some things

you are stopping us all the time

Hey, I talked to the writers

this pregnant corinna thing

they have to know it too
-Yes

Stanis, but let's agree on things

You told me you were going to make the R limp

Okay, I haven't done the limp R,

but at least the phrases
we try to say what we have told ourselves

But don't stop us!

Gentlemen, we do one thing, we anticipate the pause

we do the scene later

I have to study it better

I can hear it, I have not seen it before

It's not worth it, it's a recorded rehearsal!

It's out of curiosity

One minute?

One minute!

I would be very happy for Corinna!

Even though she has to put down the role
and you lose your job?

I'd be glad anyway!

I have lost it!

Now she's going to give me a heart attack!

No, notary, calm down, it's simple

it is 50 and 50 notary

if tails, sign!

if it comes out expensive I will not sign

What has come out?

It is cross!

I mean, Corinna isn't pregnant ???

What a joke!

Oh well, thank God!

But do you know that this scene is not bad at all?

I've seen it over and over again, I like it!

Yes, you still have to bend the end a little

because it's a bit vulgar

but you just have to put "what a fortune"

that fits right in the lipstick

take some close-ups of Martellone

that he makes his funny faces

and you will see how we have opened the comic line!

AND?

I have lost the child!

Children? What a child?

As always you do not understand anything!

Lets go!

It is cross!

It is cross!

What a fortune!

No, the comic line, no! Please!

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