Blindspotting (2021–2023): Season 2, Episode 5 - Karate Kiss - full transcript

This is Dante Bosco,
and you wouldn't believe

what happened last week
on Blindspotting.

Whoo!

Yo, who's Mustafa?

I was married in Bali.

I became a stepmom
to his daughter, Tiarre.

And we was a family.

You said that he didn't
double down for you.

It seems unhealthy.

Well, I don't think
that healthy

is your area
of expertise lately.



-I'm Ashley.
-I'm Teena.

My husband's doing
a bid out there.

Same.

It all goes downhill
from here.

But I just wanted some of my
own time with my son.

Can you just back off?

Oh, my God. What a bitch.

These are my tax returns
since 2010.

I don't have any before this,

but I think
the statute's passed.

And they can't come after us

for some shit I did in 1998.

Uh, Mom...

-Okay, this is--
-It has to be you.



Trish can't handle
the paperwork.

I'm not saying
you have to take over.

I just want to catch you up
on the house,

my life insurance, my will.

These are my passwords
for my laptop,

my phone, my e-banking logins.

Oh, Mom,
why are your online passwords

on a piece of paper?

Security.

That's not how that works.

This is a little crazy.

I'm in prison.

I can't even keep
this stuff here.

I know.
I just want you to be familiar,

so you can be the point person
if something happens.

You know who would make
a great point person?

Ashley.

She's gonna know
about all this anyway.

We don't keep secrets
from each other.

I mean,
why don't you just cut out

the incarcerated middleman here

and just go right to her,
please?

We're on a little bit
of thin ice, the two of us.

One wrong word,
and I'm in danger

of catching frostbite
in the living room.

Frostbite? Really?

I just don't want her
making decisions for me.

Okay.

Did something happen?

Do you want me to talk to her
about it?

No. No, no, no, no.

I just want to enjoy
my visit with my son.

It's never long enough.

Well, why don't you come
to one of the weekend

family visit things?

Great. Yes.

Okay, good. Yeah.

Talk to, uh, Ashley about it.
She'll set it up.

Just tell her you wanna come
the next time.

Sure.

Okay.

Let's talk
about something else.

- Anything else.
- Great.

Um, how is Nancy?

Oh.

You won't believe what she
has fucked around and done.

Damn, Mama.

You was watching
the Santeria documentaries

again, wasn't you?

Funny.

You having a chill night in?

No, I'm going to Luka's
with Ashley.

Uh, why you got your old
keyboard in the kitchen?

You should make it
a fancy night out.

Get all dressed up,
and put on that nude lipstick

you just bought--you know,
that nice kind of rouge colour.

The rouge colour?

- Mama--
- Yeah.

No.

Why? What for?

It is Luka's.

Well, you never know

who you might bump into.

I'm only going 'cause
that fucking Teena girl--

yeah.

She invited Ash.

And you know Ash been on one,
drinking and shit,

so I'm just going
to babysit her.

I tried.

Oh. Uh-uh. Uh-uh.

Don't try to beat me
to the door.

That's what it is.
You got a new man coming.

Okay.

Yeah, let me see
where y'all going.

♪♪ On the telephone ♪♪

Mustafa.

Hi.

-Bye.
-Bye.

Take care of my baby.

- Take care, Mama.
- Mama!

What...

♪♪ That woman's love ♪♪

♪♪ Hey, that woman's love ♪♪

♪♪ Helps me find my way
Back home ♪♪

♪♪ Help a man find
His way back home ♪♪

So when's y'all's
next family visit?

Actually, they gave us
another slot for next weekend.

Can't believe we got
a second one so quick.

Do those say Oakland?

Yup.

I like these.

Thank you.

God, I haven't been here
in so long.

My squad used to come here
all the time.

Well, it's easy, cheap,

and the niggas
are always thirsty,

so we will never be.

Fuck, it's cold out here.

I was just trying to be cute.

You really don't get out much,
do you?

Yeah, well,
I spent 12 years with a man

whose coat I could just steal.

Mm. True.

Damn,
of course Janelle is bailing.

She came back from Bali
100 years old.

Okay, well, fuck her.

You got me, and I do go out.

So just do as I do, bitch.

A'ight.

There that nigga is.
Come on.

- Huh?
- DNAS! Hey!

- Hey, what's good?
- Hey, what's up, Teena?

Hey, can we slide in?

All right, but I don't want
no shit tonight, Teena.

Nigga, come on.

I don't want you gigging
on the bar.

All right.

All right, come on.

-What?
-What?

Sorry, y'all.

Gentrifiers last.

-Let's go.
-Okay.

Eh-eh-eh.

You thought
you about to get in here.

Go back.

Why are you here, Staf?

I came to surprise you.

Okay, and what would lead
you to believe that I

wanted you to surprise me?

You've been texting me
for weeks.

You've been telling me
you miss me.

You send nudies.

What about my booty says,

"Fly your ass
halfway across the world"?

I mean, have you seen it?

Stop.

What it was saying was,
keep your lonely ass in Bali

and never forget how
good you had it...

and that I'm doing
better than you.

I mean, it was nice,
how we were texting, right?

Yeah.

So maybe we can enjoy
each other while I'm here.

See how that feels?

The fuck?

Not keeping up with your
martial arts training, I see.

Shut up.

I wasn't ready, obviously.

These right here...

best green tea candy in Bali.

I missed these.

I missed you.

Um...

What's all this about, huh?

'Cause you ain't staying here.

This is my Airbnb.

You lying.

Stafa.

Shots all night.

Ooh! Yikes. Okay.

So anyway, bitch,
what I was saying--

can we get two more? Mm-hmm.

I was running at Dolores,
and this bitch

thinks that she can pass me up.

I'ma start placing
the 200, bitch.

Let me tell you right now.

We like three snakes
in the Garden of Eden.

Okay, sir, now you know
that makes no fucking sense.

Just stop. Okay.

It wouldn't be proper
of me to pass you by

without a proper hello.

Not proper at all.

-We're married.
-Hell, yeah!

No, not to each other.

-Stop. Stop.
-Oh.

They here?

Hey, yo, uh, Pops.

Listen up now, man.

Yeah, come on, man.
Leave them be.

Damn.

Sorry, young blood.

Sorry, pale young blood.

I didn't realise
they was yours.

Carry on.

So I guess you owe me
a drink now, huh?

Wait, what was that?

I said, you owe me a drink.

I let you say you could pull
me, so where's my drink?

All right, come on,
I got you.

Okay. Go ahead.

-No. Oh.
-Oh.

Hi.

-Oh.
-Ah... hello.

Hey, listen, um, look,
my friend dragged me here.

He wants to make sure
I have some fun,

but I'm not great at this.

Can I buy you a drink?

Please?

Sure. A Beautiful.

Yes, you are.

No, I'm talking
about the drink.

-The what now?
-The- the drink?

A Beautiful?

Two parts Hennessy, one part
Grand Marnier, in a snifter.

-All right.
-Warmed up.

-You got it.
-And- and a cherry, please.

Hey, can I get a Beautiful?

With a-with a cherry.

- Oh, yay. Yay.
- Yay.

No, you did not.

She's too young to be
bringing boys home anyway.

-Oh, my God.
-I had to at least scare him,

you know.

How was I supposed to know

he didn't know
how to land properly?

Staf, oh, my God.

Ah, he'll be fine...

in a few weeks.

Uh-uh. Uh-uh.

-Ah, look at Ti.
-Aw.

I miss Tiarre so much.

She still talks
about you all the time.

I don't get you, Staf.

I was there.

I was so ready
to make a life with you.

Janelle, my daughter
barely got to know

her mother before she died.

I wasn't asking you
to let me replace her mother.

I was asking for you to make
a new space for me.

I was asking you to fight
for me in your life, for us.

I-

-Janelle.
-Don't.

Your form was a bit wilder, no?

No.

My parries are fine, strong.

Nah, it felt sluggish, slow...

like you haven't been training.

Oh, well,
big surprise there, huh?

Nothing I do is enough.

And let's be very clear.

I'm as sharp as ever.

You were always enough.
It wasn't that.

No? What was it, then?

I can't explain it.

But it just hurt the first time
she called you "Mom."

Well, I love her.

I can't help
how she felt about me.

I wasn't ready to hear her
call you that.

I'm sorry.

But I never thought you'd leave
us.

I had to leave.

You were shutting me out

and pretending
that you weren't.

Are you okay?

Oh. Okay.

So hold up.

What was your plan
with this grand gesture, huh?

-What?
-'Cause I noticed you

didn't bring Tiarre with you.

That means that you
came here to, what,

to fuck and then
disappear again,

or relive some shit
that I didn't already bury?

No, that's not it.
That's not-that's not true.

-No? No?
-"That's not true? No, no, no?"

-That's not true?
-That's not it.

Okay, then show me your visa.
Mm-hmm.

'Cause if you staying here
longer than 30 days,

you gonna need a visa, playboy.

Where that's at?

You're right.

I didn't come to Oakland
to move here.

I want you to come back
to Bali.

Be my wife again.

You said
I never fought for you.

Well, here I am.

I'm here to fight
for your love.

Bring it, then.

Hey. Y'all smoke?

Oh, yes, God, please.

I know it's a little fancy,
but--

No, I could do fancy.

I like nice things.

Shit, it's fucking cold
in here.

I got my jacket over there,
if you want to wear it.

Wh-what?

My jacket! It's over there.

Oh. Uh, nah.

Nah. I'm good.

All right.

Two more, please.

Whoo!

Girlfriend, girlfriend,
girlfriend, go.

Okay!

Hey, hey, let's go. Whoo!

Shots!

♪♪ Hyphy, hyphy,
Hyphy, hyphy ♪♪

♪♪ Came to get it popping ♪♪

♪♪ Like it's bubble wrap ♪♪

Actually, you know what?

Um, can I... can I get
your jacket?

Oh, okay.

Thanks!

♪ Been stealing
niggas' jackets since '99! ♪

The patriarchy owes us, okay?
It's a tax.

Oh.

Oh, you just going
to get on up, huh?

Not Nancy's stuff.
She'll kill me.

What?

Oh!

Fuck, it feels so good
to be out doing

some normal-ass shit, girl.

I needed this.

Oh, yeah, no, anytime.

♪♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, look ♪♪

Whoo! It burns!

Hey, man,
it's your boy Fabby Davis Jr.

of the Mack Pack, man.

You know what I'm saying?

And, uh, niggas be hating
on the Town, man.

So we can really show y'all
how that shit go, man.

Look.
♪♪ I got the North ♪♪

♪♪ Got the
East got the West with me ♪♪

♪♪ So I suggest you niggas
Don't mess with me ♪♪

♪♪ You need to be cool 'cause
you don't wanna squabble ♪♪

♪♪ 'Cause we could do
the fool ♪♪

♪♪ But you don't
want a problem ♪♪

♪♪ Put that on something
I put that on fathers ♪♪

♪♪ Put that on something
I put that on mamas ♪♪

♪♪ Put that on something
I put that on grandcitas ♪♪

♪♪ You run up on me,
Get your man beat up ♪♪

♪♪ Bushrod, Gaskill,
6-deuce, Goldenville ♪♪

Ah!

Come on.

Ladies first.

Bet.

♪♪ Real high ♪♪

♪♪ These niggas
Wanna speak down on me ♪♪

♪♪ I'ma slay 'em with my fire ♪♪

♪♪ With my fire, my fire ♪♪

♪♪ Hot like lava,
what do you desire ♪♪

♪♪ I'm on fire ♪♪

♪♪ You you can't can't
trust me bitch ♪♪

♪♪ I'm about my dollar ♪♪

♪♪ That's the reason
Why I'm rich ♪♪

♪♪ They try to slander
My name ♪♪

♪♪ But I won't let 'em
Get this close ♪♪

♪♪ Oh, Lord, oh ♪♪

♪♪ Listen to me ♪♪

♪♪ Listen to my story,
Story, story, story ♪♪

♪♪ I kept it a flamma ♪♪

♪♪ And I ride with my banga ♪♪

♪♪ I was thugging,
Twisting my fingers ♪♪

♪♪ All my niggas,
They so dangerous ♪♪

♪♪ Can't ride with us ♪♪

♪♪ We're taking flights ♪♪

♪♪ If I say jump,
Would you do it? ♪♪

♪♪ What would it take
You to prove it? ♪♪

♪♪ Fuck it, I might
Pull up with a choppa ♪♪

♪♪ And chop your partner
Like steak and lobster ♪♪

♪♪ Pull up with a thermometer ♪♪

♪♪ Extended clip
Like a helicopter ♪♪

♪♪ We can get hekka traffic ♪♪

♪♪ While traveling through
Africa ♪♪

♪♪ Faker den
I thought you was ♪♪

♪♪ I thought you was
A conqueror ♪♪

♪♪ Fucking up your faculties
Actually causing casualties ♪♪

♪♪ But everybody dies, B
I'ma hustle ♪♪

♪♪ It reminds me of a nigga in
The '90s ♪♪

♪♪ With a mack on my lap ♪♪

♪♪ Slander my name ♪♪

♪♪ But I
Won't let 'em get this close.

♪♪ Oh, Lord ♪♪

♪♪ Oh, listen, listen to me ♪♪

♪♪ Listen to my story,
Story, story, story ♪♪

♪♪ Oh ah ♪♪

Stop it.

We love each other.
We can do this.

Don't do that stuff.
Don't try to read me, okay?

I ain't seen you
in almost a year.

What kind of form is that?

Town.

Town?

Oakland. My true form, okay?

I had to come home.

I was scared.

I needed to be with my family.

Titi misses you.

I miss you.

I wasn't ready
for her to call you Mom

because it felt like it was...

erasing something about her,

something about me.

When you left,
there was this love,

this great indescribable love
that I lost,

and Tiarre lost it too.

We've lost so much already.

I can't lose you too.

We are family.

No shit, Staf.

Why you didn't just text that?

Because I feel
like the delivery is key.

♪ I hope I don't go back ♪

♪ To slanging yayo ♪

♪ Slanging yayo ♪

♪ To get my mail, oh ♪

♪ I hope I don't go back ♪

♪ To slanging yayo ♪

♪ Slanging yayo ♪

♪ To get my mail, oh ♪

You learned
my favourite E-40 song?

♪ Been a hustler since birth ♪

♪ Mama selling dinners
For the church ♪

♪ Red-handed, caught me
Stealing money out of purse ♪

♪ Got branded, permanent
Whip scars on my back ♪

♪ I used to get beat
With racing car tracks ♪

♪ But now me got wealth,
Holding a conference call ♪

♪ In my hands-free
Car telephone ♪

♪ Looking like I'm talking
to myself ♪

♪ Shooting the breeze,
Cutting it up real tough ♪

♪ Like chopping it up
Like a true businessman ♪

♪ Talking about, by the way,
B, what we doing this week ♪

♪ On SoundScan? ♪

♪ I hope I don't go back

♪ To slanging yayo ♪

♪ Slanging yayo ♪

♪ To get my mail, yo ♪

♪ Ooh ♪

I love you, Staf.

I love you more.

Oh.

No, no, no, no, no.

Go away.

Hey, but I thought that--

Move!

Hey. But... But...

Oh, time to go, bitch.

- Get up!
- What?

- Wait, wait?
- Wait, no, call me!

- What the fuck?
- This bad. This bad.

696--

Get the fuck off me, bitch!

I'm trying to help you.

What are you talking
about?

Handle
your Saturday night nigga,

and I'll handle mine, okay?

I have a husband,
and so do you.

Where? Where is he?

Chri-Chris? Chris?

Chri--oh, that's right.

He's doing ten years
in prison, Ashley.

That's not funny, Teena.

"That's not funny, Teena."

So this is what you do
on the weekends, huh?

I brought you here to get
your mind

off of the truth, okay?

Miles doesn't belong
to you anymore.

He belongs to them.

You can't stand here
and tell me

that you don't see
that fucking shit.

Nothing is ever the fucking
same after this shit, Ashley.

You are just like me.

You know what the fuck
we're doing here.

You think I didn't
see you in there

kissing that pale-ass nigga?

Come on girl.

You came out here in that tight
ass dress

thought you weren't gonna get
any attention.

I know what you want.

I know that you want this.

You wanted hin to come and feel
up on you, didn't you?

Bitch!

Get off.

Shit.

What the fuck?

Get off of me!

Ow.

Oh, shit.

Fuck.

It fucking burns.

You wanna go to Caribbean City?

What? Why? Now?

Well, bitch, my night's
not over.

-We just fought.
-So?

-"So?"
-So friends fight, okay?

Now I know I gotta back up

if I'ma roast you or something.

Girl, I gotta go home.

You sure?

Yeah, I'm sure.

Okay.

Yikes.

Right there.

Hey.

I know you think
I don't miss him.

But I do.

Every fucking day.

You didn't see anything.

Okay?

Night, Ash.

♪ This is the ballad
Of the broken ♪

♪ Eulogy of the bruised
That spews unspoken ♪

♪ on a poorly-lit corner of West
Oakland, ♪

♪ Where new whites drive by
On fixed-gear bikes ♪

♪ And old town shit dies
By the light ♪

♪ Of another liquor
Store closing ♪

♪ And I am a vagabond
of afterthoughts ♪

♪ Manic in the pageantry of an
Impossible plastic posture ♪

♪ Pressured by a rotting
Precedent of my Babylon ♪

♪ So before you begin,
Let me remind you ♪

♪ These motherfuckers wish I
Was who they never could be ♪

♪ Wish they did what it does
While I do it begrudgingly ♪

♪ I am most in the mud ♪

♪ It's made thick in my blood ♪

♪ And I misstep occasionally ♪

♪ So fucking what? ♪

♪ So fucking what? ♪

Fuck!

♪ I trip right on the gun ♪

♪ Fuck, I mixed lights
With the rum ♪

♪ And flew a bit too
Tight to the Sun ♪

♪ A Bay girl gets
No license to run ♪

♪ I got to be dirty as
A Magdalene ♪

♪ And holy to these-
Holy to these- ♪

♪ Holy to these niggas
as a nun-as a nun ♪

♪ And down like a clown,
No matter the sentence sung ♪

♪ Or grip on my lungs-
grip on my lungs- ♪

♪ Grip on my lungs ♪

♪ But what if I'm coming
Undone? ♪

♪ What if-what if-what if
They got me coming undone? ♪

Fuck, I'm not the one.

I'm not the fucking one.

Nelle.

Okay, I'm coming.

Shit, knocking on my--

shit, Ash, you okay?

You look cute but fucked up.

Yes.

Ooh, girl, is that Mustafa?

Mm-hmm.

He looks
more handsome in person.

I like the facial hair.

Okay. All right.

Why don't you come on inside?

No, no, no, no, no.

I want to...

-What? You what?
-mm...

I just came to say
that I love you, Janelle.

And I love you so much.

Oh.

Oh.

Okay.

I love you too.

Uh-huh.

Girl, he's cute.

Mm-hmm.

You should hold onto him
real tight.

He is fine, ain't he?

Yeah.

Oh, I'm-I'm sorry.

Yeah.

I shouldn't be here.

Okay, um, just act like...

act like I wasn't here.

I'm a magic-I'm a magician.

Shh.

Shh, okay.

Please text me
when you get home.

Okay.

Mm-mm.

She seems nice.

Mm-hmm.

And has a great eye
for how handsome I am.

Shut up.

Give me my blunt.

Hey, party girl.

Wild night?

Huh?

Oh. Um, yeah.

Is Sean asleep?

Out like an adorable log.

It looks like you lost
an earring.

-Honey, are you--
-I can't.

Um... I can't be around you
right now, Rainey.

I'm sorry.

Good night.

And frostbite.