Big City Greens (2018–…): Season 3, Episode 6 - Trivia Night/Big Trouble - full transcript

Cricket wants to prove to his family that he isn't dumb during trivia night at the café. Tilly gets punished for the first time and decides to break bad.

(theme music playing)

SINGER: ♪ One, two ♪

♪ La, la, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, la, la ♪

Good evening, everyone!

And welcome to Gloria
Plus Green Cafe's

first-ever trivia night!

(cheering)

Wow, it appears
we'll be facing the entire

neighborhood in this
intellectual blood-sport.

No sweat.
Our competition's a bunch



of empty-headed know-nothin's.

If only your brain were
as wrinkly as your face.

You wanna catch these hands,
you smooth-brained ingrate?

Can we not, Ma?

Trash-talking aside,
I agree with Alice.

The Green family makes
a killer trivia team.

Bill knows science
from working on the farm.

Tilly's a well-read
expert in literature.

And Gramma's a history buff
after living so long.

(makes sound)

And I used to be a roadie,

so I've got music covered.

Plus you got me.

Oh, Cricket.



Yes, we sure do, kiddo.

We sure do.

All right. Let's see
what category I can take.

Hmm. Oh, perfect.
"Geo-graffie!"

Guess that's me.

Geography is a bit
of a tough one, brother.

You sure you got it?

Don't worry. I'm a whiz at math.

Okay. First question,

who wrote the classic
novel Little Women?

-(buzz)
-Louisa May Alcott.

And the first question
of the night goes to the Greens.

-(cheering)
-Very good.

Moving right along.
During what month

-does the winter solstice occur?
-(buzzer buzzing)

December. It's the month
with the least daylight.

Correct. Looks like
the Greens are on a roll.

Wow. Great job, Mr. Green.

Looks like they're the team
to beat, huh, Mr. Grigorian?

All right.
Next category is geography.

Here we go.

What is the capital of Mexico?

-(buzz)
-The answer is "M."

Come again?

The capital is the first letter,

therefore the capital
of Mexico is M.

-(sighs)
-No, no, no.

It's Mexico City.

And right you are, Remy.

Cricket, wow, just wow.

-Dang, I was real close.
-Hey, son.

What if you let us handle
the geography questions?

But that's my category.
If I can't do that,

how will I help the team?

Well, you could press
the buzzer.

-Oh, yeah!
-That's a great idea.

Nobody's faster than
you, Cricket!

(excited gasp)
Wait a minute.

Y'all think I'm dumb
or something?

-No, not at all!
-Absolutely not.

The nerve! Look, I admit,

I'm not the sharpest spoon
in the bucket,

but I've got some
real smarts in my noggin!

Hey, it's all right, kiddo!

I'm sure a question
you know will pop up!

But for now,
just focus on the buzzer, okay?

I know I know stuff.

I just gotta look deep
inside my mind and find it!

Huh?

Ahh! I'm inside my head!

And this must be
my dadgum brain!

Wheeee!

Cricket, what are you doing
with that--

-Cricket!
-(laughing)

It looks like
it's getting pretty full.

Should we send the signal?

Nah, just schedule it for later.

(upbeat music playing)

I'll never
get sick of this song.

This place is amazing!

But how am I gonna find--
ah, excuse me.

Can I get some help?

Buzz off. Can't you see I'm--

it's the boss!

-I never thought I'd see you.
-Wow!

-He's here!
-He visits us!

Hi. What the heck are you guys?

We're your Brain-Crickets!
"Brickets" for short.

You think it, we make it happen!

How can I be of service?

Well, I need to go
see all my knowledge.

Sure thing.

Follow me right this way.

Welcome to your knowledge bank!

That's a lotta knowledge!

And you're adding
to it every day! Oh.

Here's some new knowledge now!

Blegh! What are those?

Factoids!

Each one is a little fact
you've learned.

"M" is not the capital
of Mexico!

Hey, that's right.
Because I learned...

Remy knows
the capital of Mexico!

Oh, man. I've gotta have
better stuff than that, right?

See, there's this trivia night
thing going on

and I've got
to impress my family

with some big brained knowledge.

Hmm. We're gonna need some help.

But I know just who to call.

Boss, meet the very first fact
you ever learned.

Dogs can't spit.

Oh, yeah.
I remember learning that.

Spitty's been here
longer than any of us.

You won't find a more
qualified brain guide.

Dogs can't spit.

You're saying my real smarts
are in "the vaults"?

Wait.
How can I understand you?

Dogs can't spit!

Oh! That makes
perfect sense!

Now, let's hit those vaults!

I've got to prove to my family
that I'm not dumb.

Speaking of which, boss,

I believe you're needed
back outside!

-(moan)
-GRAMMA: Cricket!

Cricket, I know this one!
Hit the buzzer!

-Cricket!
-Huh?

The answer is 1903!

Take that, you dirty witch!

(laughing)

What in the sam heck
are you doing over there, boy?

Don't be hard on Cricket.
He probably got confused!

Here, son,
this is the button part.

You gotta do this motion
on the top to--

I know how a dang
buzzer works, Dad!

I gotta find those smarts quick.

Guys! Come on.
We don't got time to waste.

Right. Spitty!

Dogs can't spit.

Whoa, so these are the vaults?

Dogs can't spit.

Okay, so each vault contains
specific knowledge,

but you're not sure which one
the real smarts are in?

Man, you guys
should label this stuff!

Dogs can't spit.

Don't sass me.

(upbeat music playing)

Waffles are just pancakes
with squares!

No matter how much you drink,

coffee foam doesn't fill you up!

Looks like this vault
is just facts about food.

(gasp) Is that Phoenix?

(heavy panting) Bark!

(gasp) Ahh,
get back, you monster!

(whimpers) Relish!

Relish!

The word "relish"

always calms Phoenix down.

Aww, this vault
is just Phoenix facts.

Swing and a miss!

(laughing)

What am I gonna do
with all these Croblins?

-(farts)
-Koo-koo-kachoo!

Funny, but not what
we're looking for.

Come on, Spitty.

Nostradamus!

Correct!

Latitude!

That's right!

The War of 1812!

Another for the Remingtons!

We're starting to lose our lead!

Well, we're trying
to give Cricket a chance,

but is he even with us?

Cricket! Cricket!

Ugh, we've checked
almost all of the vaults

and ain't found diddly-squat!

This has to be the one!

Please, please, please, please.

What the--

Bats hurt!

Lemon juice burns the eyes!

Wood hurts!

Marble hurts even more!

Corkboard ain't that bad!

Pain facts!

This room is dangerous.

Dogs can't spit!

The real smarts.

Spitty, ya found 'em.

Hey. You know what hurts?

(indistinct chatter)

(chomp)

Dogs! Can't! Spit!

Bats hurt. Bats hurt.

Spitty!

Dogs!

Can't!

Spit!

Spitty, no!

Whew. Spitty, your sacrifice

will not be in vain.

All righty. We're at the last
question of the night

and it's the bonus
mystery question!

That's worth five times
the amount of points!

-Mystery question?
-All right, Greens.

All hands on deck!
This could be for anyone!

Stay sharp, Cricket,
we might need you!

Not to worry, family,

I've finally found
my real smarts.

You had to find them?

I had to dig deep,

but finally I can unleash

all of my incredible knowledge.

Antarctica is cold.

Fourteen minus six is eight.

That's it?

That's all I have?

Ugh, never mind.

Where are you going, son?

Home. I'm no good to ya.

All I got in my head
is useless junk.

-Cricket.
-Don't beat yourself up, boy.

I mean it ain't like
you're Grigorian-level stupid.

That's it! Take this,
you putrid bowl of oatmeal!

-Whoa.
-Whoa.

Whoa.

Sorry about that.

(screaming)

I knew I should've got
coffee foam insurance!

I can't open the door!

I never thought I'd suffer

such a foamy demise.

What do we do?

Well, it's just coffee foam.

We could probably eat
it because...

Coffee foam doesn't fill you up!

Coffee foam doesn't fill you up!

Everyone eat it! Eat the foam!

Come on, you guys! I can't help
y'all if you don't chill out!

Brett, try saying
the word "Relish."

It helps soothe my dog Phoenix!

Uh, okay. Relish, relish.

That worked? Thanks, Cricket!

That was really smart.

I can't get close enough
to unplug the foamer!

How do we shut it off?

Ahh! Huh?

Corkboard!
Mr. Remington,

I need you to throw me
into that corkboard!

I'm not about to throw a child.

-You'll get hurt!
-It's all right.

Corkboard don't hurt that bad.

Now quarterback me!

Oh, say less! Hike!

That only kind of hurt!

Now that really hurt.

We're free!

Hey.

(cheering)

Did we win? What's happening?

You saved us, Cricket.

Well, it's the least
a dummy could do.

-NANCY: Dummy?
-Cricket, you're not a dummy!

Thanks, Dad, but I couldn't
even answer one trivia question.

Son, there's all different
types of knowledge.

Some conventional.
Some more unique.

Without your special know-how,
we would've drowned in foam!

Well, koo-koo-kachoo.

I guess I'm smarter
than I thought!

Though I wish I could've gotten
at least one question right.

Oh, yeah,
what was the mystery question?

Oh, it was, "Name one
animal that can't spit."

Ah-ha-ha!

Dogs! Dogs can't spit!

Hey, yeah, that's correct!

-Woo-hoo!
-(cheering)

Dogs can't spit.

(dramatic music playing)

Oh, Tilly,
my sweet little angel.

A real beacon of goodness,
that one.

Welp, one out of two ain't bad.

Ah, nothing like
a freshly cleaned... house?

What in the--

Cricket!

MAN (on TV): New diet cheese
puffs are so light,

they'll make you Fly!

Yeah, right.

Whaa--miracles are real!

Wee--oh, hey, Dad.

I just finished cleaning
the whole house,

and then you go
and wreck the place?

What are you talkin' about?
I didn't do nothin'.

-I've heard that one before.
-Pardon me, Papa.

It was actually me
who was responsible.

I gave Melissa a mud bath
and then I brought her inside

for tap dance lessons.

I now realize I should
have swapped those two items

on our itinerary.

Tilly, you did this?

But--but I thought
you were an angel.

-I am!
-Cricket's always

the troublemaker.

I suppose I have no choice

but to send you
to your room, Cricket--

oops, reflex.

I meant, Cricket--darn it!

Come on, stop fighting it.

T--Till--Till--

Cricket! Cricket! Cricket! Gaah!

T--Tilly,
I just cleaned the house

and you know dirty animals
aren't allowed inside.

Therefore,
you're being punished.

I've never been punished before.

Now, go to your room.

I--aah.

BILL: I thought
you were an angel.

I'm shocked.
This is bad, Tilly.

Have I fallen from grace?

What does this mean?

Have I sunken deep

into a life of misdeeds?

I thought I was Papa's
perfect little angel.

But angels don't do bad things.

Angels don't disappoint
their Papas, do they?

No, no, they do not!

So, if I'm no longer an angel,

I'm... a bad kid.

That's right, Mr. Friggles.

Don't look away
from my twisted rebirth.

Tilly Green is an angel no more!

(laughing)

Okay, Tilly!

I think you served your time,

you can come out now!

This feels so wrong.

She'll be fine.
It builds character.

Yeah, Dad, this is
an important moment for Tilly!

It's the beginning
of her journey as a bad kid!

I gotta make sure
to document the very beginning

of Tilly's descent.

Now, if I know my Tilly,

she'll never do
anything bad again.

Sup, old man?

Wow.

Tilly, what happened
to my good little girl?

The Tilly you once knew is gone.

-Wow.
-This can't be happening.

My good baby.

-(blubbering)
-This is so funny.

Oh, my gosh.
Tilly, Tilly, Tilly!

Do something bad!
Do something bad!

No! Do not encourage this!

First, I'm gonna drink
this milk.

Oh! Well, in that case,
you better grab a--

But I'm not gonna grab a cup!

But that's so unsanitary!

Now, I'm gonna scratch
all my bug bites!

But that only makes
them itchier!

Tilly!
Where are you going?

-Out.
-Where?

To a little place called Nunya.

It's in the business district.

Okay. So that's Nunya
in the business district.

Nunya business?

That does it.
There go your extended

TV privileges, young lady.

Do you hear me?

I can't believe
this is happening.

Listen, we all knew
that if one of us

were to snap one day,
it would be Tilly.

-It's always the quiet ones.
-I'm sorry.

Tilly had
"extended TV privileges?"

Well, yeah. I give Tilly
rewards for good behavior.

At least I used to.

You mean being "good"

comes with perks?

So that's why people do it!

(sighs) I guess
I better figure out

what I'm gonna do
when Tilly gets home.

Rewards for good behavior, huh?

(chuckles)

-(bell rings)
-Whoa!

Who are you
and what do you want?

Relax, Andromeda.

It's me, Tilly.

I'm just bad now.

And you're gonna be bad with me.

I've never been
peer-pressured before.

I'd be honored!

TILLY: We shall become
the baddest,

most feared group of bad girls,

and Saxon, in Big City.

We are The Monarch Butterflies!

Why are we called
The Monarch Butterflies?

Because they're
poisonous to birds.

-Oh.
-Now listen up, ladies.

Here's what we need to do.

One surefire way to be bad

is to lie.

I said I wanted bangs.

Excuse me.

I just have to say,

your haircut looks very cool.

No, it doesn't!

You're a liar!

Sure am. And lying is bad.

But, you know,
hearing someone say that

has really boosted
my confidence!

Now I feel like
I can take on the world!

Thanks, little girl!

TILLY: Another way to be bad
is to make mayhem.

I just know today
is gonna be a good day.

Ugh! Oh, no!

Mayhem made.

(gasp)

Are you... okay?

You saved me.

Listen, I know we just met,
but will you marry me?

-Yes.
-What?

But aren't you upset?

You just stepped on my gum!

None of this would've
happened without you.

Here's an invite.

It's a June wedding.

Wow, Tilly, you've changed

several people's lives
for the better!

I'm confused,

are we still pretending
to be bad?

I'm not pretending!

The good Tilly is gone.

This is who I am now.

-I have to do something bigger.
-Bigger? Like what?

Something that only the most
rotten of apples would do.

Steal.

Here you go, Gramma.
Brought you some tea!

Precooled, of course.

Oh, aren't you sweet.

And I love that triple-braided

double basket weave.

It's elegant and modern.

Oh, thank you.

Here, come and snuggle
with your Gramma.

Now that's a good boy.

So this is what
it's like to be good.

Man alive,
I've been missin' out.

What? What is this?

The boy is being a perfect
little sweetheart,

-that's what.
-It's true, father.

Need I remind you
of earlier

when I was falsely accused

of getting mud in the house?

Key words being
"false" and "-ly!"

Yeah, Bill, Cricket's
helping out, actin' polite.

He even bathed
for the first time in days.

-Weeks!
-The boy deserves

some positive reinforcement.

Just look at him!

I guess everything
going on with you kids

has me all topsy-turvy.
You're right, Cricket.

I should've trusted you before
and I should trust you now.

You're free to do whatever
you want the rest of the day.

Whatever I want?

Hey, welcome to Sip 'N Snak.

Be cool!

Can I help you find anything?

-We're just browsing!
-Uh-huh.

(goat beats)

Tilly, you can't steal,
it's bad.

-This isn't like you.
-Well, get used to it.

I know I'm not good.
So if I'm not bad,

then what am I?

You're, uh--you're on your own.

I can't do this!

-(sobbing)
-Hmph.

Well, I can do
bad all by myself.

I just need
to find somethin' small

that'll fit in my pocket.

(bell rings)

Hey!

I told you not to call me.

I'm supposed to be working.

I'm not interested
in any of your wares, goodbye!

Forgot my goat.

All right. This thing is hot.

Let's just lay low
and keep our cool.

(goat beats)

-Not speaking today.
-Yeah, huh.

Okay. You're almost
to your room,

no one is gonna find out.

-GLORIA: Hey, Tilly!
-Don't arrest me, officer.

Whoa, Tilly.
It's just me. Relax.

Cool outfit by the way.
Did you steal that

from a rock star's closet
or something?

Steal? Why would you
even think that, Gloria?

Okay.
Maybe the real thief here

is you after you stole
your brain

from the crazy store,
you ever think about that?

Phew. Look at yourself, Tilly.

You're mean to your family
and friends.

You're lyin', you're stealin'.

-(ominous heartbeat)
-Huh?

What... what is that?

What?

You're a bad person.

No, no. No,
I don't wanna be bad anymore!

It's too late.
You're already a bad girl!

No!

HEART CANDY DISPENSER:
It doesn't matter

what you tell yourself.

We all know what a rotten person

you've become on the inside.

Ba-ba-barracuda--
I'm sorry, boss.

I'm not on my phone. Huh?

I'm... I'm sorry.

Uhh.

It was me.

I stole
the candy heart dispenser

because I had
to prove I was bad!

But then, I got home
and it was just nightmares!

I deserve to be
thrown to the Big House.

Take me away.

Uh, thank you

for bringing this back, I guess.

Just don't do it again.

You should also probably go.

Okay.

GRAMMA: Hey, Bill.

You happen to see my--
what the--

how many times
do I gotta tell you?

If you're gonna
wallow in despair,

do it outta the way!

Sorry, Gramma.

I just don't know what to do.

I failed at being good,
so then I became bad.

But being bad doesn't feel good.

In fact, being bad
feels really bad,

and I'm not even good
at being bad!

I don't even know
who I am anymore.

Oh, one of those. Come here.

Looks like it's a busy day
for snuggling.

(dramatic music playing)

The world's full of a lot
of weird garbage, Tilly.

Right and wrong, good and bad,

it's all mixed together
and tough to tell apart.

But one mistake doesn't define
your whole identity.

Take your mom for instance!

She made tons of mistakes.

Does that make her a bad person?

Well, no.

And you know who else
has made mistakes?

All of these folks.

We've all screwed up
a bunch of times,

but that doesn't make
any of us bad people!

We're flawed
just like anyone else!

Oh, except that little
cutie on the end there.

She's perfect as she is.

And you're a good one
too, Tilly.

Don't you forget it.

Thanks, Gramma.

Tilly, I have something to say.

Don't worry, Papa.
I'm over my bad girl phase!

Oh, thank goodness.

Well, at least
until I hit adolescence.

-Then all bets are off.
-That's gonna be good.

Boy, it's hard for a parent
to keep up sometimes!

Just look at Cricket!

He's been such a good
kid all day!

Turns out,
the best part of being good

is earning your family's trust.

So you can get away
with doing bad stuff! Whoa!

I'm innocent. I swear.

Ah, forget it.
I'll see myself to my room.

SINGER: ♪ I got
sweat in my eyes ♪

♪ Lost a bet and got bit
by a hundred flies ♪

♪ I fell out a big ol' tree ♪

♪ Hit every branch
and scraped up both my knees ♪

♪ I got chased by dogs ♪

♪ Licked by a frog
Got a rash on my legs ♪

♪ Dropped a dozen eggs ♪

♪ I got splinters
in seven of ten ♪

♪ And tomorrow,
I'll do it all again ♪