Big City Greens (2018–…): Season 2, Episode 24 - Mages & Mazes/Okay Karaoke - full transcript

Remy invites Cricket, Tilly and Kiki to play a fantasy role playing game, but his overzealous rules lead to a disagreement. When the Greens and Remy go out for karaoke, Tilly struggles to decide which type of music best suits her.

- [buzzing]
- [distant singing]

The Green family
singing karaoke?

This will certainly be
a delight.

I can't wait to sing,
and by sing, I mean,

make fart noises into the mic.
Like so...

- [deep inhale]
- No, Cricket.

Remy, I'm a little surprised
you wanted to join us.

- Do you like singing?
- Uh-huh!

I sometimes sneak out of
choir lessons and come here

to practice my
ecclesiastical songs, instead.

Naughty, Remy.

Wow, I can't wait sing.

I'm itchin' for that limelight!

Well, Ma,
we gotta wait our turn.

I got the programmer!

I had to fight someone! Had to
pull out the ol' chompers.

So, who's ready to pick a song?

Whoa! Hold on there,
little guru.

Picking a karaoke song
is no careless task.

Uh, who are you?

Why, I'm Kara Karaoke.

And I own this
little slice of Shangri-la.

Karaoke is one of the purest
forms of self-expression.

It fosters a sense of
community and belonging.

So, dear family, choose wisely

and find where you belong!

Find where I belong?
Oh, my, my, my, my...

Uh-oh. I'm hearing some

-, my...
- [Nancy] Till?

Sorry, Mama, I'm just feeling

an awful lot of pressure
to find my perfect song.

There are just so many options.

Do I belong in pop?
Hip hop? Medieval folk rock?

What if there's nothing
that represents me?

[gasps] This is
quite the ordeal for Tilly!

Picking a song should be fun.

[gasps] I know!
We'll help you find one.

Here, I'll go first
to show you how I'd do it.

Oh! This one's
one of my favorites!

It reminds me of an old flame.

Which one is he... Oh, Bill.

-Hello, I'm Bill Green,

and I'm going to sing a song.

♪ I will always remember when

♪ You and I'd meet up again

♪ A flash of red
Ready for adventure ♪

♪ I love the times
When we're together ♪

♪ 'Cause there's one thing
A man can never give up ♪

♪ And that's the burnin' love
for his red pickup ♪

Oh, Bill!

♪ You'll always be
My number one ♪

♪ When we're together
We have fun ♪

♪ Through the rain, the dirt,
The snow, the muck ♪

♪ I can never give up
My pick-up truck ♪

♪ Carried lumber
With no complainin' ♪

♪ V-8 engine
Never strainin' ♪

♪ If I was to somehow
Up and quit you ♪

♪ I guarantee
I won't forget you ♪

♪ You'll always be
My number one ♪

♪ When we're together
We have fun ♪

♪ Through the rain, the dirt,
The snow, the muck ♪

♪ I can never give up
My pickup truck. ♪

- [applause]
- Thank you, everybody!

Very passionate, Mr. Green!

Yeah, you usually break
into tears during the bridge.

Aw, thanks guys.
But how about you, Tilly?

Think you might wanna
try a song like that?

Papa, your song
was a perfect fit for you,

but I'm not sure
it's a song for Tilly.

Well, when I'm having trouble
figuring stuff out

or I'm feeling
all pent up inside,

I like to do something
with a little attitude.

[hard rock music playing]


♪ Oh, authority is not for me
This I know is true! ♪

♪ I'll push a door
That says to pull ♪

♪ Don't tell me what to do!

- ♪ So, back off! Back up!
- ♪ Back off! Back up!

♪ Time to move
And pack it up ♪

- ♪ Check in! Check out!
- ♪ Check in! Check out!

♪ Raise your voice
It's time to shout! ♪


♪ So don't listen
To your teachers ♪

♪ Or the TV weatherman

♪ Your response to everyone

♪ Is to kick them in the can!

- ♪ So, back off! Back up!
- ♪ Back off! Back up!

♪ Time to move
And pack it up ♪

- ♪ Check in! Check out!
- ♪ Check in! Check out!

♪ Tell 'em what
You're all about! ♪

♪ Back off! ♪

[continues note]


Thanks, everyone!

Hope you had
as much fun as I did!

- Whoa.
- Hey, y'all!

So, what did you think?

That song just makes me wanna

shove people around
and break stuff!

Son, she doesn't
actually want you to go out

and destroy things.
She was using metaphors.

Well, I thought
your explosive lyrics

were both thrilling
and profound, Mama.

But I can't help wonder
if my one true song

is still out there.

Well, you'll never find it

if you keep listening to
their awful music!

Oh, boy, here we go.

Everything new
sounds exactly the same!

Like garbage!

What happened to
the good ol' classics

everyone used to sing?

Like "Choo-choo Gotchu,"
or "Honeybee Mondays"?

- Are those real songs, Gramma?
- I don't know what that is.

I'll prove to y'all
they're classics for a reason!

Don't you worry, Tilly!
Gramma knows the song for you.

['30s music playing]

♪ When you're in a bind
And not sure what to do ♪

♪ You might be tempted
To try something new ♪

♪ But no, don't do it!
Stick with the classics ♪

♪ Yes, the classics
Are always fantastic! ♪

♪ Oh, when newness
comes a-knockin' ♪

♪ With that new type
Fast talkin' ♪

♪ You young folks
Might think I'm lame ♪

♪ But my answer
Is always the same ♪

♪ What do I think of new?

♪ Just ask my kazoo!

[playing kazoo to tune]

So, this is the stuff you like
once you're older, huh?


- [tooting]
- Come on, Tilly!

You know you wanna!

Tilly, don't you wanna go
up there with your Gramma?

This song is perfect for Gramma,

but again, I don't think
it works for me.

Eh, her loss.
Time for another kazoo solo!

Will Tilly ever find
where she belongs?

[Kara Karaoke]
Excuse me, child.

While you should not
choose your song in haste,

time would not
choose it for you.

So, in other words, please
hurry up and choose something

- so others can have a turn.
- I'm sorry, family.

I don't wanna be
a stick in the mud,

but the lyrics to my song
need to be just right.

Sister, sister, sister,
you're overthinking it.

And overthinking
is the devil's other name.

- Ain't that right, Remy?
- Yeah!

Just don't think about
the lyrics.

I don't know if I...
Oh, it's happening.

-♪ Uh, Cricket Green
-♪ Remy Remington

♪ There's a lot of
Big questions
That make us feel small ♪

♪ Why are we here?
What's the point of it all? ♪

♪ Tell us to
Look in our books ♪

♪ But to find the real answer
It's all about the hooks ♪

♪ Don't think
About the lyrics ♪

♪ Don't think about the beat

♪ Just shake that booty
And get on your feet ♪

♪ Just throw your hands up
And sway to this song ♪

♪ 'Cause when you're dancing
You can't be wrong ♪

♪ Whoa! Remy!

♪ It wasn't curiosity
That killed the cat ♪

♪ It was eighteen years
Of private education
Picture that ♪

- ♪ Thinking is dumb!
- ♪ Oh!

- ♪ Caring is dumb!
- ♪ Oh!

- ♪ Parents are dumb?
- ♪ Oh!

- ♪ Leave them behind?
- ♪ Oh!

-♪ Hitch a ride on a train
-♪ Oh!

- ♪ Become a carnie?
- ♪ Oh...

Uh, Cricket should we
really be saying all this?

Don't think, Remy!

♪ Don't think
About the lyrics ♪

♪ Don't think about this song

♪ 'Cause when you're dancing
you can't be wrong ♪

♪ Whoa!

[both panting]

- Bad message! Bad message!
- Whoo-hoo! All right!

- Wow, that was quite the...
- [horn toots]

Would you make
a song decision, already?

I put on this goofy hat
to sing some Ska!

Does that little girl
have the programmer?

I've been waiting to
make my Broadway debut!

We wanna sing our duet!

I wanna sing my
wickity-wickity-wack rap!

Skrra! My dad's droppin' bars!

[crowd complaining]

- Hey!
- Back off!


I have just hit my limit.

- Hey, pick a song, already!
- Tilly!

[slams, locks]

Well, Tilly, the road of
indecision has brought us here.

All alone,
hiding from an angry mob...

on a toilet.

Why are you
doing this to yourself?

There are literally thousands
of songs to choose from.

All you need to do is...
pick... one...

Ugh! Or maybe
I should just resign myself

to living in this bathroom
for the rest of my life.

Tilly? I'm sure anything
you sing will be great.

You don't understand!
I know it's silly, but...

I just wanted to find a way
to truly express myself.

You all got to sing songs
that were perfect for you,

but no matter how hard I look,

I just can't find a song
that's me.

Maybe I'll never find
where I belong.

- But...
- Dad, lemme try talking to her.

[clears throat]

the reason you
can't make a decision

is 'cause your perfect song
doesn't exist.

Dang it, Cricket, we're
trying to help your sister!

- [door opens]
- Wait! That's it!

I can't find my perfect song

because it doesn't exist!

Mwah! Thank you, brother!

Wait, hold on, I...

And that's how you do it.

here's the song programmer.

So, you finally picked a song?

What's goin' on?

- [feedback]
- [deep breath]

[a cappella]
♪ I am Tilly Green

♪ And I thought there was
No song for me ♪

♪ Kept looking for something
pre-written ♪

♪ A mold that I could fit in

What song is this?

I think she's making up her own.

♪ But in all the tunes
That I perused ♪

♪ Nothing felt Tilly true

♪ I didn't think
I was such a puzzle ♪

♪ All I wanted was
Something playful ♪

♪ With just a hint
Of trouble! ♪

♪ So, if you feel you're wrong
and don't belong ♪

♪ Just do your own thing
And say so long ♪

♪ Yeah, that's what I'm doing
When I sing this song! ♪

♪ Yeah, it feels so good
To sing my song! ♪

♪ If you're a fish
Out of water ♪

♪ Maybe ya gotta dig
Your own lake ♪

♪ If you can't find
The right color ♪

♪ You just gotta mix
Your own paint ♪

♪ Doesn't matter
If you're different ♪

♪ So long as what you do
Is right for you ♪

♪ Your uniqueness
Is a treasure ♪

♪ Sharing differences
Brings us together, ooh ♪

♪ If you feel you're wrong
And don't belong ♪

♪ Just do your own thing
And say so long ♪

♪ Yeah, that's what I'm doing
As I make up this song! ♪

♪ Yeah, it feels so good

♪ To sing along

[just Tilly]
♪ To Tilly's song!

[cheers and applause]

So, sweetie, how do you feel?

Like I belong.

Aww, Tilly!

Well done, my child.

By looking within yourself,

you were able to find
your true song.

Well, thank you very much!

Hey, since Tilly won
at karaoke, or whatever,

do we get a prize, or something?

There never was a prize.

Your satisfaction
with expressing your soul

should be its own reward.

Since when is satisfaction
a reward?

At least give me
a bad t-shirt I'll never wear!

I think it's time
we call it a night, brother.

Will the next performer
come to the mic, please?

[ska music playing]

♪ I got sweat in my eyes ♪

♪ Lost a bet and
Got bit by a hundred flies ♪

♪ I fell out a big old tree ♪

♪ Hit every branch and
Scraped up both my knees ♪

♪ I got chased by dogs
Licked by a frog ♪

♪ Got a rash on my legs ♪

♪ Dropped a dozen eggs ♪

♪ I got splinters ♪

♪ In seven of ten ♪

♪ And tomorrow
I'll do it all again ♪