Big City Greens (2018–…): Season 1, Episode 7 - Gridlocked/Mama Bird - full transcript

Bill takes the family on a road trip, only to wind up in a traffic jam. Tilly finds a bird's nest and cares for the eggs, hoping the chicks will imprint on her.

[theme music playing]

One, two!
One, two, three, four!

♪ La la la la la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la la ♪

[chicken squawks]

Ah, nothin' like a nice walk
to clear my head.

Maybe not as relaxin'
as back home,

but I can just pretend
I'm in the country.

I got a little nature.

Ahh! Tree.


Yeah, and put pepperoni
on it!

Slather it in cheese!

Hey, buddy!
Wanna buy a beard?

Uh, no, thanks.

Probably a good decision.

Hey! Your electric guitar
is so loud,

I can't hear
my electric guitar!

-Oh, yeah?!

-[both shredding]

[all blabbing]

Yeah! Teenagers!

Huh?! What?!



Aah! Aah!




This guy's
got the right idea.

Hey, everyone!
We're takin' a day trip
to the country,

so get in the truck
right now!

[all] Yay!


No, Ma, you're not
gettin' a shotgun.

Fine, but I'm
sittin' up front.

Ah! Can't wait to get
back to the country.

Calm and quiet,
wide open spaces,

and views as far
as the eye can see.

Everything this city
doesn't have.

Well, we better
get there soon.

Gettin' jittery!

Might need to kick
a seat!


Don't fret, Cricket.

There's plenty of fun
to be had on the road.

Oh, my!
Do you see that?

All these cars have
happy little faces
on their butts.

Oh, no!
Except for that one!

It's so dirty,
it just wants to be clean.

"Wash me, Tilly!

You gotta wash me!"

Oh, if I could.

I know what will
help pass the time.

Some good old-fashioned tunes.

-♪ They see me funkin' ♪

-♪ Fun fun fun ♪

I'm sick of all these
new-fangled jumpin' jams!

I want a song like me--
and oldie, but a goody.

Ugh! So bored!

Need entertainment!

Hey, mister,
honk your horn!

[chuckles] Okay.
No harm in that.

[horn blares]

Aah! Gee! City drivers
are so aggressive!

[Cricket] All right!
A second truck!

Gimme some sweet honkage!


Why isn't he honkin'?

Come on, buddy,
gimme that toot toot.

Oh, so that's how it's
gonna be, huh?

I'm gonna get a honk outta you
whether you like it or not!

Unh! Unh!

[grumbling gibberish]

Honk. That. Horn!

-[brakes screech]

-Aw, great!
-What's goin' on, Dad?

Why did we stop?

Everyone stopped.

It's bumper to bumper
out there!

We're totally gridlocked!

We're like sardines
crammed in here!

These cement walls
are so high,

I can barely breathe!

[Tilly] Hey, Papa,
I got an idea.

Since we're stopped,
why don't we get
out of the car?

We could, you know,
stretch out legs,

catch our breath,

wash a stranger's car.

Uh, not a bad idea, Tilly.

-Ah! Oh, geez.

Okay, no problem.

-Excuse me, Papa!

Aah! Mom!

Sorry, sorry.
Let me just-- [grunts]

There we go. [sighs]

Oh, man, things
were just gettin' good.

Now we're stuck here,
and I'm more bored than ever.

-[tap tap]

Oh, my gosh!
He's got a hook hand?!

Aah! He's comin' over here?

W-w-why's he doin' that?


Hey, there, little guy.

I'm gonna make you
into the happy car
you were meant to be.

There we go!


"I'm so filthy, Tilly!
I'm cryin'!

I'm cryin'
dirty, muddy tears!"

Oh, no!
He's gettin' even sadder!

What do I do?

Whew! Finally!

A little breathin' room.

Hey! Stretchin' your legs?

Mind if I join?

Cool! Highway party!

I got chips!

Yeah, sounds great!

[all conversing]

-[dance music playing]
-Aw, yeah!

Turn up
the traffic jams!

-♪ Everybody join the party ♪
-Ooh! Hey!

Ohh! I'm sick of all these cars
and people and noise!

Time to find out what's
causin' all this traffic

once and for all!

Nnh! Why won't he leave?

What does
this guy want from me?

[laughing maniacally]


I wonder if he heard that?



Let's see here.

-[song playing]
-Ah! [grumbles]

[male DJ]
Welcome back, listeners.

We're taking
your song requests,
so call in now!

Don't mind if I do.

Hello, caller,
you're on the line.

[Gramma] You been playin'
trash all day!

You better play
a song I like,

or I'm comin' down there
and causin' a ruckus!

Is that what you want, boy?

A ruckus?!
I ain't above it!

Whoa-ho! We got
a feisty one here.

Reminds me of my mother.

I could never please
my mother.

Which is why I'm gonna
find that perfect song
you've been craving.

Sound good, Mom?

Uh-- uh, I mean, ma'am?

Yeah, whatever,
just make it snappy.

Okay, Mommy, I love you!


These napkins and Papa's
proof of insurance
aren't workin'.

You're still filthy.

[fire truck honking]

Why isn't anyone

Don't they know
it's lunchtime?!

Aw, somebody's
a grumpy bear today.

You need to take a walk?


Oh. That'll do nicely.

[on bullhorn]
Everyone remain calm!

I just found out
this megaphone

can do a robot voice.
Beep! Boop!

Excuse me, officer,
what's goin' on here?

[feedback squeals]

Oh, I'm sorry. Well...

we have received reports
that there is an animal loose

on the highway!

It's bad.

So just go back
to your car and wait.

This whole situation
will be over in a matter
of several hours!

Pardon me, officer,

but I'm gonna take care
of this myself.

Well, okay.

Wow, I've never met
such a brave and stupid man.

Skittish city folk.

Blockin' up
the whole dang highway.

Probably just a squirrel
or some...


[ominous music playing]

Well, maybe
a really big squirrel. Eee!

What was that?

I know you're out there,

and I don't care
how big a beast you are!

I'm not lettin' you
or anything else

stop me from gettin'
out of this city!

Ohh! It's
a majestic young buck!

What's a gentle creature
like you doin' out here?

What's that little guy up to?

Is he about to...?

Yep, he's chargin' at me.


Aah! Aah! Aaah!



Hmm! Just gotta stay hidden.

That maniac could be anywhere.


Honk honk!

He's got my scent!

Stop followin' me!

Come here!


All locked! Aha!

[bouncy song on radio]
♪ Fun fun fun fun ♪

♪ Fun fun fun fun ♪

♪ Fun fun fun fun ♪

♪ Fun fun fun fun ♪

♪ Fun fun fun fun
Fun fun ♪

Gotta be faster than that

to catch ol' Cricket Green!






What's gotten into that thing?



Aw, poor guy.

[strained grunt]

Hey, hey, hey,
it's okay, little guy.

I get what
you're goin' through.

Surrounded on all sides,

no space to run around.

It's enough to drive
a guy crazy.

You know,
we're not that different.

We both want to be
somewhere else.

But for now,
we're right here,

so let's calm down,

take a few breaths...

There we go.

And try to appreciate
where you're at.

Sometimes you might
surprise yourself.

-♪ So if things
are feelin' low ♪

♪ And your life is all askew ♪

♪ Just climb the tallest hill
you find ♪

♪ And change
your point of view ♪

♪ It's true ♪

Now that's music.

Aaah! Gramma!
Gramma! Aaah!

Ah! Now, this is relaxing.

I think I even hear
a babblin' brook.

Okay, Mr. Car!
Bath time!

You've done it, Tilly!

I'm finally clean enough to--

[sinister tone]
take over the human race!"

Okay, have fun.

Car washes for everyone!



You gonna gut me
'cause I wanted you to
honk your horn?

Huh?! Well, fine!

Just make it quick!

Huh? What are you
talkin' about?

I just wanted to tell you
that my horn doesn't work.


That's why I was takin'
you back to my truck,
to show ya.


Sorry if I startled you.

I'm not great with people.

Probably because I spend
most of my life
in a tiny box.

Ha ha ha! Pfft!

Well, that makes sense,
I guess.

Anyway, thanks
for not bein' a murderer.

No problem!

I guess you can say
hooks can be deceiving.


[both laughing]

Yep! Okay!

See ya later! Yeesh.

[laughing hysterically]

Attention! I have
an important announcement!

I found a bag of gorp!

If you'd like some,
let me know!


You tamed the beast!




Okay, little guy.
Let's get you home.

Cricket! Tilly!
We're leavin'!

Okay, everyone,
problem solved!

Let's keep it movin'!

Well, it's been fun.

but it's time
for you to go back
where you belong.

All right, gang,
we're burnin' daylight.

Time to head home!

You sure, Dad?
You hardly got to spend
any time in the country.

Nah, I'm good.
I got what I was lookin' for.

Me, too.

My own personal DJ.

Now play it again!

Anything for you, Mother.

-♪ Life depends upon
your point of view ♪

-[all] Aww!
-[horns honking]

[both] Hole, hole, hole!

We're gonna dig
a big old hole!

I'll dig a hole
that'll fit my head.

And I'll become queen
of the mole people.

[both] Hole, hole,
hole, hole.

We'll dig a hole
that'll make us whole!

car alarm blares]

[man] Oh, great.
An axe in my car.

If it ain't one thing,
it's another.

Cricket, what is
wrong with you, boy?

I got holes
on the brain, Dad.

- Oh, no.
- Huh?

Look, Papa. This nest
fell out of the tree,

and there's
eggs in it.

Oh, careful, Tilly.
When baby birds hatch,

they think the first
creature they see
is their mama.


So if I was
the first thing they saw,

they would think
I was their mama?


Which is crazy,
so just leave it be.

Their mama could
come back any minute now

to check on her babies,

and those little chicks
will need their real mother,

not you, sweetie.

Okay, Papa.

Yeah, come on, Tilly.
We got holes to dig.

Don't think I forgot
about you, mister.

Don't worry, little babies.
I won't abandon you.

I'll be such a good mama.

You'll say, "Tiwwy,
Tiwwy, we wuv you so much,"

and I'll say, "Sorry.
I don't understand bird,

but I understand love."

Well, Dad says
no more shovels,

at least until I learn
to "act responsibly

around dangerous objects."
[blows raspberry]

Hey, didn't Dad say
to leave that nest alone?

Yes, but life does not
abide by the rules.

Just imagine
what it would be like

to have a bunch of
cute baby birds lovin' you.

Doesn't do much for me.
Actually sounds like
a lot of work.

Hush your mouth.

It's happenin'!

[shells cracking]



- [frantic chirping]
- Huh?

Oh, uh, hey,
little guys.

Welcome to the world.


No. Uh, come on.
Your mama's over here.

[chirping stops,

Hey, look, Tilly,
these little guys love me.

They're followin'
my every move.

No. No!

I'm your mama,
not Cricket.

Fine with me. I'll just be
their fun uncle. Funcle.

[making funny noises]

[happy chirping]

Knock it off, Cricket.

They're supposed
to love me,

and they will love me,

even if I gotta
make 'em love me.

[makes funny noise]

Come on, birdies.
If you think Cricket is fun,

wait until you hang out
with Mama.

Hey, I'll teach you a song.

It goes a little
something like this.

[inhales deeply]

♪ Hello, little babies ♪

♪ My pretty little birds ♪

♪ Are you ready to give Mama
those three magic words? ♪

♪ A little bit of love
is all I need now ♪

♪ Please, please,
just give your love to me ♪

♪ Why do you think I do this ♪

♪ Work myself into a sweat? ♪

♪ What part of "give me love"
do you not get? ♪

♪ I'm your one and only mama,
you know it's true ♪

♪ And I'm also
the only thing making sure ♪

♪ You don't die of
neglect, hypothermia,
scurvy disorientation ♪

♪ The governor and all other
manner of horrible afflictions ♪

♪ So if you ask me,
I'd say a little love is due ♪

Oh, stop it.
You're drowinin'
me in love.

I clean up their mess,
mush about their worms,

teach them songs,
but do they love me?

No. They love Cricket.

Maybe I can't
compete with Cricket.

At least, not in
my current state.

Tilly, I haven't seen you
all afternoon.

It's suppertime.

Is that you?

I'm sorry, Papa,
but I can't understand you.

I only speak bird now.


Tilly, I thought
we talked about this.

You were supposed
to leave those birds--



Come on. Eat up.

Well... [nervous chuckle]

I don't wanna
get in the way of...

whatever this is.


All right, everybody,
time for bed.

Good night, Michelle.

Good night, Julie.

Good night, Barnaby.

I won't be sleepin' though.

Instead, I'll be
singin' you my song,

and when you
sing it back to me,

then I'll know you love me.



- [chirping]
- Huh?

Holy Montana moles.

Did my hard work
finally pay off?

Do you finally
love me, little bird?

Come here and give
Mama a... huh?

Good morning!

[loud yawn]

Oh, good morning, Jimmy.

I call this one Jimmy.
I call 'em all Jimmy.

But his name is Barnaby.

[happy chirping]


I'm a chick magnet.
Get it?

Taking care of baby
birds sure is fun,
huh, Tilly?

That's it!
I have done everything

a good mama does
and more.

I smothered them
with love,

and I got worm guts
stuck in my teeth.

What is the point
of givin' love

if you don't
get any back?!

Sorry, what did you
say, Tilly?

I couldn't hear you
over all these love chirps.

ungrateful children.

What? You can't just leave.
You said you'd take care of 'em.

I don't care
what I said then.

This is what
I'm doin' now.

But I can't
take care of 'em.

I'm just their funcle.
The funcle!

Here's your order,

an empty cup,

and a fistful
of creamers.

Your service will not
be forgotten.

So... where's
your brother?

Oh, he's home
with the little ones.

They're no longer
my concern.

Little ones?

Okay. Well, um,
if there's nothing else.

There's nothin' else
for me.

I gave 'em my time,

my mind, and my spirit.


Have you ever loved, Gloria?

I think
you've had enough.

I'll tell you
when I've had enough.

It's always something
with your family.

Come on, birds, eat
your gummi worms. Come on!

Hey, you, stop playin'
with dangerous objects.

Don't you know
you could get hurt?

[gasps] Oh, no.
Listen to me.

I'm turnin' into
my father.

- No!
- Huh?

I'm suddenly overcome
with a feelin' of... pride.


I can't take this.
I gotta get rid of these birds.

But how?

That's it.

All right, little guys.

Funcle Cricket
needs his space,

which means it's time
for you to learn to fly.

I put the mattress down there
as a safety precaution,

but I really need you guys
to nail this on the first try.

Now fly!
Fly far away!

I'm free.


[frantic chirping]

Ooh, whoops.
Uh, don't worry, guys.

Funcle Cricket's comin'.

Ah, dang it.

Hold on.
My dang overalls are stuck.

Hang on,
little birds.

Huh? Hey, wait.

Tilly, help.
I need your help.

I needn't concern myself.

They have chosen
not to want me.

The baby birds
are in the trash!


do something!

My babies are in trouble.

Huh? My skateboard!

Ah, a fellow believer
in the feudal bartering system.

A yellow light.

Mama always said
yellow means floor it!

Hey, whoa.
Careful with
the truck, man.

My mama didn't
raise no turtle.

She's my mom,
too, Jordan.

Oh, man, my bagel.

Oh! Which way?

That way.

We're full.
Start the compacter.

Oh, the truck.

Oh, no!


Baby birdies?

- [chirping]
- Michelle!

You're safe now.


Come here, you.

Barnaby. Barnaby?

Where could he be?

Oh, my little babies

♪ My pretty little birds ♪

♪ Are you ready
to come to Mama ♪

- [chirping]
- Barnaby!




Got it!


Don't worry, Tilly.
I'm comin'... oh.

Tilly, you okay?

You wouldn't
believe it, Cricket.

They learned
my song.

I just started singin',

and Barnaby
came right to it.

Oh, heh, sorry about that.

That's okay.
I love 'em,

but I'm not the one that
should be takin' care of 'em.

Oh, no, no,
no, Tilly.

And neither are you.

Well, it's been fun,
little guys,

but Papa was right.

I shouldn't have
moved your nest.

You need your real mama.

"We understand, Tiwwy.

This is for the best."



Look, Cricket,
it worked.

Their mama came back.

That sure is nice.

Can't wait till
our mom comes back.

Yeah, me, too.

Dad said
you ate worms.

That's so gross.

But what do
they taste like?

Kinda like
a caterpillar.

♪ I got sweat in my eye ♪

♪ Lost a bet and got
bit by 100 flies ♪

♪ And I fell out
a big old tree ♪

♪ Hit every branch has
scraped up both my knees ♪

♪ I got chased by a dog ♪

♪ Licked by a frog ♪

♪ Got a rash on my leg ♪

♪ Dropped a dozen eggs ♪

♪ I got splitters
at seven and ten ♪

♪ And tomorrow,
I'll do it all again ♪