Big City Greens (2018–…): Season 1, Episode 4 - Cricketsitter/Backflip Bill - full transcript

♪♪[whistling]

♪♪

♪ One, two, three, four ♪

♪ La la la la,
la la la la ♪

♪♪

♪ La la la la ♪

♪♪[whistling]

[hen clucks]

[Bill] You're going
to the doctor

for a checkup,
and that's that!

[Gramma]
I ain't goin'!



I don't need
some snake-oil salesman

rubbing cream on me
and giving me funny pills!

No, Ma, that's not
what doctors are like today.

They're nice! You'll even
get a lollypop. It's fun!

And that's when they
stick you with the leeches!

No sirree, there'll be
no doctors today!

Not over my healthy body!

-[grunts]
-But, Gramma,
if you're so healthy,

why do you groan
when you stand up?

I ain't groaning,
I'm growling!

-[protesting]
-Well, off to the doctor's!

Oh, right,
my two kids!

Can't leave 'em
at home alone.

I guess I gotta
call a sitter.



Aw, Dad, you don't
need a sitter.

We can be
our own babysitter!

You can trust us.
Ooh, aah.

Forgot I had a bunch
of rusty nails in my pocket.

-Uh, Tilly.
-Yes, Papa?

Watch Cricket and make sure
nothing bad happens.

I need you to be
the big sister today.

I'm counting on you, honey.

-[gasps]
-What? Aw!

Of course
you'd pick Tilly.

Always doing
what she's told, meh meh meh.

You will not be
disappointed, Papa.

I promise I'll be the best
babysitter there ever was!

I can't imagine
you letting me down.

-[protesting]
-All right, be good.

Please be good.
Just please.

Bye, Papa!
Don't you worry about nothin'.

Hello, sister.

Hello, Cricket.

Are you ready to have
a nice quiet time?

I am not!

With Dad and Gramma
out of the house,

it's the perfect time
for me to scratch

a few items
off my bucket list!

Bucket list? I guess
it's never too soon

to start preparing
for your passing.

What? No, Tilly, that's dark.

It's a list of everything
you can do in or with a bucket.

Bucket skateboarding.
Bucket boxing.

Bucket fireworks
explosion extravaganza?

I don't know
about this, Cricket.

I wouldn't want
to break Papa's trust.

Cricket?

Don't you think this list
is a bit reckless?

Of course it's reckless!

Why do you think
we're doing it now?

If Dad were here,
he'd never let us play

something like
bucket-head bowling!

Uh, this seems like
the opposite of what Papa--

[grunting]

This does not bode well
for my babysitting career.

[laughs] Whee!

Cricket! I must respectfully
request that you stop!

-[laughing]
-Cricket!

Can't hear ya
'cause I'm not listening!

Aah! Wah!

Whoa.

Cricket, I am putting
my foot down.

You gotta listen to me!

If stuff's all messed up
when Papa gets back,

he won't see me
as the responsible
young woman I am!

Wait, where'd you go?

Can't hear ya!

Doing number 14
on the list.

-Wah!
-[car alarm blaring]

Oh, Cricket! I gotta get him
to listen to me.

What should I do, Saxon?

If I can't get
a handle on Cricket,

I'm gonna let Papa down.
He'll never trust me again!

I'll get... [swallows]

the disappointed face.

Yeah, that's the one.

Oh, it's uncanny.

But how do I get
Cricket to listen?

-[in Saxon's voice] Scare him!
-Scare him? Explain.

[in Saxon's voice]
Remember when the cat

got himself stuck
in the dishwasher?

He sure learned
his lesson!

Nothing scares Dirtbag
more than a dirty dish.

-[yowls]
-[crashing]

I see. I gotta make him
scared of his bucket list.

Bucket windmill ride,
all right!

Aw. Come on,
you dang wind.

Propel me to fun!

[huffing]

[Cricket] Ah, I'm tired.

All right, Miss Brenda,

we're gonna give Cricket
a little spook,

just enough
to get him to listen.

Forgive me.

-[slap]
-[moos]

I think I feel
a breeze start-- aah!

See, Cricket,
if you'd have listened to me,

you would not be spinning
in terror!

[screaming]

[gasps]

[grunting down the tree]

[clang]

[gasps] Cricket!

Oh, Cricket!
Oh, my gosh!

Talk to me, Cricket!
Are you okay?

Eh, I'm okay.
I'm all right.

Mm! I'm fine!

Huh? Oh, that's funny.

I meant to raise
both my arms.

Aah!

Your arm!

I know earlier
I said I was fine,

but I think I am
very much not fine!

I'm so sorry, Cricket.

No. I'm the one
who's sorry.

I should've listened to you.

You were right all along.

You were so right,
it's almost like... you knew.

-[swallows]
-You knew that I need help!

Listenin' is not
my strong suit,

so from now on I'm gonna
listen to whatever you say!

It don't matter.

When Papa finds out
you're hurt,

I'm gonna be
in so much trouble!

No. I'll be in trouble.

I'll tell Dad that this
was not your fault.

Yeah? I mean, no.

I'm gonna get us
both out of this mess...

regardless
of whose fault it is.

I don't deserve you.

Eh... um...

There! That's about as good
as a doctor could do.

Papa will never know.

Wow! Pretty sturdy
for a mud cast.

I think everything's
gonna be A-okay!

[both screaming]

Okay, this isn't working.

Maybe we need to take you
to a real doctor.

But that's where Dad
and Gramma are!

I'll get
in trouble for sure.

Hmm... No!

We won't get in trouble
if they can't recognize us.

[doctor] I've never seen
anything like this before.

For a woman of your age,
why, you're as fit as a fiddle!

What? I mean,
that's good news, I guess.

Hah! Told you
I was healthy.

Truly remarkable!
Do you mind if I--

-[shatters]
-Amazing.

What's your secret?

My secret's minding
my own business!

Fair enough! I'm not worried
about you at all!

However, you, sir...

-[quavers] Me?
-Yes, you!

I'm much more worried
about you.

Signs of little sleep,

overworked,
clearly stressed.

I'm afraid we're going to have
to run some tests right away.

Ha-ha!

Eh, are you sure this'll work?

I thought you said
you'd listen to me.

Now, stick to the plan!

There's a 45-minute wait.

This brave soldier
will be dead in 45 minutes!

His wounds
need attention now!

-What happened?
-Uh...

-He's real hurt. See?
-[screams]

We're losing him!

Oh, my.
Right this way, please.

[both gasp]

How's your zinc intake?

I... five zincs a day?

Don't lie to me.

Eh, no! Cricket, move!

-Aah!
-Huh?

Hmm.

[quavers]

Thank you for your service.

Eyesight deteriorating.

The doctor
will see you now!

Wow. You just keep doing
favor after favor for me.

Right this way, please.

I'll never forget this day!

[sighs]

[whirs]

Cheese!

When's the camera flash?

Yup, that's definitely
a dislocated shoulder.

Oh, no!
That sounds serious!

Aw, relax,
it's no big deal.

We just need
to pop your shoulder
back into place,

and you'll be
just fine.

Hear that, Tilly?
I'm gonna be A-okay!

Oh, thank goodness!

So he's not gonna die!

He must've taken
a pretty hard hit.

-What happened?
-Huh?

Well, I guess
I can tell you,

but this is one
of those doctor-patient
confidentiality type things.

So, I was supposed
to look after Cricket,

but he kept
doing crazy stuff.

So I had to scare him
a little bit,

but instead he got hurt
and it's all my fault,

and I'm so overwhelmed
that I might fall asleep.

[snoring]

What? Wake up!

Oh! Wow, it makes me
feel so much better

to get that off my chest.

-What?
-Cricket?

-[glass squeaking]
-No! No, no, no!

You weren't supposed
to hear that!

I thought you were
looking after me,

but you were only
looking after yourself!

Shame on you!

Oh, that hurt real bad,

but it was worth it
to make a point!

Hey! You need to give
that arm some rest.

-Don't you want it to heal?
-Are you kidding me?

This here's my evidence!

-Dad!
-Cricket, no!

-Get back here!
-Dad! Dad! Dad!

You'll never guess
what Tilly did!

No, Papa,
don't listen to him!

[bystanders] Huh?

-[panting] Dad?
-Does my eye look funny?

Uh, not Dad.

[grunting] Dad?

Uh, we're
on our lunch break!

Not Dad.

Dad?

Hello.
Whoopsie!

Not Dad.

Dad! Dad! [gasps]

There you are!

Dad! Tilly broke me!
Tilly broke me!

-Cricket!!!
-Aah!

Haven't you
hurt me enough?

Cricket, no!

Just wait till Dad
hears about this!

Huh?

Fixed? Aw.

Dad will never believe me
without proof.

You mean you're
not gonna tell Papa?

Tell him what,
that perfect little Tilly

turned my arm into a noodle
and conspired to hide it?

Yeah, right. No way
he'll believe me now.

Congratulations, sister,
your reputation is safe.

Papa, I gotta
tell you something.

Cricket got hurt,
and it's all my fault.

I wanted to impress
you so badly

that I put my brother
in danger,

and nothing's worth that.

I'm no babysitter.

I'm a baby-breaker,

so give me
the sterndest, harshest,

most disappointed
face you got,

'cause I deserve it!

[sobs] Papa?

Papa, oh, my gosh!
He's dead!

The truth killed him!

Oh, no, he's not dead.

He just passed out
at the first sight of a needle.

He let out
quite the scream.

What did he say?

"Mummy, mummy, save me.

I'm a big baby." Hmm.

Well, any-hoonahs,

I need you
in Room Four stat.

One word--
hemorrhoids.

Whew! That was close.

Tilly, I can't believe
you were gonna take

the blame
for both of us.

I gotta say, you ain't
a great babysitter...

-Aw...
-But you're a great sister.

Aw!

Well, at least
you got a lollypop.

They were out
of lollypops!

My, you big baby.

Dad and Gramma!
How are we gonna
beat 'em home?

-[moos]
-Huh?

Miss Brenda!

Hmm. Wanna check one more thing
off your bucket list?

[gasps]

-Whoo! Yeah!
-[moos]

Hey, Dad, I got
the tool you wanted!

Uh, thanks, Cricket.

Now, pay attention, kids.

Water heaters
can be tricky things.

Of course, this thing is hot,
so you gotta be real--

-[nut groaning]
-[Bill groaning]

Speak up, Dad!
I can't hear ya!

-[sizzling]
-Aah!

Oh!

[Cricket]
Oh, my gosh, Dad!

[laughs] Don't worry, Cricket.
I'm fine!

Nah, I was talking
about this.

Dad, is this you?

[chuckles] Yup.

I did gymnastics
as a kid.

They used to call me
Backflip Bill.

Boy, that sure was fun.

[Tilly] "Bill's
Power Ballad Mix"?

This'll spice up
my morning routine!

This stuff is great!

How come you keep it
all hidden down here?

Well, I was
really looking forward
to my first big competition,

but I ended up
not competing.

That is so sad.

What happened?

It's not important.

That's stuff's
all in the past.

It was just a silly
childhood dream.

But I'll always wonder
what would've happened

if I'd gone through
with it.

Maybe I could've placed,

or even won.

Ah! I've moved on.

[low] Doesn't sound like
he's moved on to me.

Papa, if you don't
follow your dreams,

regrets follow you.

I read
that somewhere.

Look, kids, I don't want
to say any more about it.

I'll say more about it!

I tried to coach
that boy.

We trained
for hours on end,

but he just couldn't hack it
as a gymnast!

Well, I guess
that's true.

See? He can't even hack it
in this argument!

[humming]

[grunts angrily]

♪ Doo-doo doo-doo ♪

-Naysayer!
-Huh?

Naysayer!
Naysayer! Naysayer!

You must've not been
a very good coach.

Dad obviously
loves the sport.

He's brimming with passion.

Anyone could coach
such a willing athlete.

You're just
a big old naysayer.

You can believe
what you want,

but your dad
is uncoachable!

Oh, yeah? I'll coach him
and prove you wrong.

You'll see! My dad's gonna be
a kick-butt gymnast!

[Cricket] You ready, Dad?

Uh, I'm not sure
about this, Cricket.

Come on, Dad.

It's time
to get gym-nasty.

Maybe we should
just go home.

Well, do you or don't you
want to achieve
your childhood dream?

All right, all right.

Hey, hey, can you believe
this thing still fits?

And they say miracles
don't happen anymore.

Yep, I still got it.

[gurgling]

I'm just gonna take a moment
to erase that from my memory.

Done.

Well, would you
look at this!

I can't believe I'm getting
back on the old horse--

pommel horse, that is!
[chuckles]

Enough
with the gym jokes!

Let's see
what you've got!

Here's Bill Green

stepping up to the line,

ready to relive
his childhood dream.

[joints crack]

Can he do it?

Are you--
you talking to me?

I'm talking to everyone.

Ah! Whoa! Oh! Oh...

Ouchy-wawa.

Dad, are you okay?

This was a bad idea.

Maybe your gramma's right.

No, she's not!

You're just
a little rusty.

That's natural.

Don't even think
about Gramma.

This is about you
and your childhood dream.

Just relax and have fun.

Ah! Thanks, son.

Just have fun.

[grunts]

Hey!

I'm really doing it!

That's fantastic!

[gurgling]

What a rush!

It's all coming
back to me!

Wow, holy cow!

In my whole life,

I never seen a guy
move like that.

It's impressive,
inspiring!

Mira, you gotta sign him up

for this afternoon's
gymnastics competition.

A gymnastics competition?
Did you hear that, Dad?

It must be destiny!

I mean,
what are the chances?

Actually, we do
this every week!

Hah! Could you
hush up?

Aw, what the heck.
Sounds like fun!

I can't believe
what I'm seeing here today.

This could be the start
of a comeback

for old Backflip Bill.

Uh, I have to go.

That's okay.
We've gotta cut
to commercial anyways.

[beeping]

[phone ringing]

If you're selling,
I ain't buying!

Remember how you said
Dad was uncoachable?

Is that you, boy?

Well, you're wrong!

So come on down
to the rec center

and see how wrong
you are!

-All right!
-[chuckles]

Got her good.

[applause]

Wow, the competition's
pretty good. Uh...

[laughing] Could--
could someone help me?

Aah! Oof!

If I'm gonna prove
Gramma wrong,

I've gotta take
my coaching up a notch.

No more Mr. Nice Cricket.

Whoo-whee!
Rings are hard!

Come on, Dad, you can do
better than that!

I'll sure try.
Thanks, son!

[Gramma] Out of my way!

I need a front-row seat!

[Bill] Hey, Cricket,
look over here!

[grunting]

-Stick the landing!
-Wha? Uhh! Oh!

Ha! Almost had it!

[moans]

-Huh!
-[chuckles]

Hey, what are you doing
sitting around?
Get back to it!

You got it, Coach!

Awfully pleased for someone
with such sloppy form!

Huh? What? Uhh!

Oops, silly me!

Come on, Dad, focus!

[groaning]

Do it again!

Uh...

Is that all you got?!

[quavers]

Hey, son, do you think
we could ease up a bit?

No way. I won't settle for
anything less than first place!

First place? I thought
we were just here
to have fun.

Fun?! Sure,
we'll have lots of fun,

if you think
it's fun to lose!

[echoing]
...fun to lose!

Stop it, Ma!

-[bystanders] Huh?
-What? Ma?

[gasps] Oh!

Wait, come back, Dad!

Where you going?

He quit! I knew
this would happen.

I told you
he couldn't hack it.

I was right, you were wrong.

That'll teach you
to doubt your gramma.

I don't understand.

I coached Dad
as hard as I could.

It's not like I gave up
on him like you did.

Gave up on him?
Is that what you think I did?

On the contrary...

I believed in Bill,
just like you.

I coached him day and night

to try and turn him
into a winner.

With his potential
and my lung capacity,

he could've won it all,

but how did he repay me?

By quitting right before
his first big meet.

I'm just gonna go out there
and have some fun!

Sure. You'll have
lots of fun, Billy Boy,

if you think
it's fun to lose!

Stop it, Ma! [crying]

Hmm.

So, you see?
He's a quitter.

Simple as that.

Oh, no.
What've I done?

[Tilly] Attention, everyone.

The gymnastics competition
will be starting

with the floor routine
in five minutes.

Excuse me, are you
supposed to be here?

That depends.
Are you supposed

to be standing
around lollygagging?

[chair squeaks]

Dad! Dad, where are you?

[grunts] Stupid... thing!

Come off!

Uh, hey, Dad.

Oh. Oh, uh, hey, son.

Can we talk
for a second?

Listen, big guy, sorry about
all the yelling and screaming.

In trying to prove
Gramma wrong,

I ended up making
the same mistake she did.

Just face it, Cricket,

I was never cut out
to be a gymnast.

That's not true.

You were oppressed
by coaches

who sucked the fun
out of your dream.

I was a bad coach,
so from now on,

I'm not your coach.

I'm your cheerleader!

And the only thing
I'm cheering for

is for you
to have fun out there.

Well, that means
a lot to me, Cricket.

I... I think
I'll give it another shot!

-[crowd cheering]
-[Tilly] And next up is...

Bill Green!

Bill Green!

Ah! Oh, my gosh! Ah!

There's a lot riding on this
for old Backflip Bill.

All he's got
is a heart full of hope...

and cholesterol.

That's so moving, Tilly!

You're really good at this.

Keep it professional,
Juan Pablo.

[sighs]

Go, Dad, go!

Go, Dad!
Go, Dad!

He's my dad.
He's my dad.

-He's my dad.
-Hmph!

He's big.
I love him...

♪♪

Whoa.

Whoa!

Bill sticks the landing!

Yeah, Dad!

It all comes down
to this last flip.

If he nails it,

he'll have the highest score
in the competition!

Wow!

-Magnificent!
-Oh, my stars!

-Unh!
-[crowd gasps]

[groans]

[person coughs]

Aw.

[Gramma] Yeah!

That's my Billy Boy!

-Whoo!
-Yeah, Dad, all right!

I believe in you. Whoo!

[crowd cheering]

I'm sure we're all thinking
the same thing, folks.

Is there even an award
high enough to award

such a stunning performance?

Wow, sixth place!

I'm real proud of you
for finally following through
on your dream, Dad,

even if you didn't
win the gold.

Nah, tungsten is

a much more practical metal
than gold, anyway.

Without it, we wouldn't
have light bulb filaments.

And then we wouldn't be
able to think of ideas.

Eh... right.

Anyway, now that I've

finally lived out
my gymnastics dreams,

I may need to retire.

My body is destroyed!

[laughing] Ow!

Hmm?

Good job out there, son!

-[squeaks]
-You finally done me proud.

Aw, gee,
thanks, Ma.

Uh, what part
did you like best?

Stop fishing
for compliments!

Hmm. Come on,
big guy.

Let's go get you
a milkshake.

♪ I got sweat in my eyes ♪

♪ Lost a bet
and got bit by 100 flies ♪

♪ I fell out a big old tree ♪

♪ Hit every branch and
scraped up both my knees ♪

♪ I got chased by a dog ♪

♪ Licked by a frog ♪

♪ Got a rash on my legs ♪

♪ Dropped a dozen eggs ♪

♪ I got splinters
at seven and ten ♪

♪ And tomorrow,
I'll do it all again ♪