Big City Greens (2018–…): Season 1, Episode 30 - Cricket's Place/Volunteer Tilly - full transcript

Remy and Cricket get their own apartment, but discover nonstop fun leads to chaos. Tilly volunteers at the animal shelter but doesn't want to part with any of the animals.

[theme song plays]

♪ One, two
One, two, three ♪


[Cricket narrating]
When you're a kid,

there's always
someone telling you
what you can and can't do.

-So many rules, so little fun.
-Wop, wop, wop-wop-wop...

You can't help but think
what it'd be like
living on your own.

Well, let me tell you the story
of how that dream

became my reality.

-[switch clicks]
-Hey, what gives?

Cricket, you've got
chores to do!

And I told you to stop
banging on those pipes!

Fine, fine.
Okay, Remy, what's next?

-Um, your chores.
-Wanna get a snack?

In case you forgot,

-I asked you to
paint the fence today.
-I didn't forget!

I had completely forgotten.

Luckily, I had an ace
up my sleeve.

Well, Dad,
what you forgot

is now that Mom's back,
I have two parents
instead of one.

So when one parent
tells me to do one thing,

I can simply ask
the other parent to--

-Nope. Do what your dad says.

Thanks, Nancy. Uh,
but what are you doin' here?

Tilly told me
you bought Choco Pops.

-Pop me, Tilly.
-With pleasure, Mama.

-Dad, I'll paint
the fence later.
-No, Cricket.

Under my roof,
you follow my rules,

and I'm telling you
to do it now!

Oh, yeah?
Hey, Dad, make me.

-Cricket, what are you doing?
-Say that again.

[slowly] Make... me.

[groans] He made me.

I hate being stuck
under Dad's thumb!

Yeah, adults
are the worst.

My bodyguard, Vasquez,
won't let me do
anything for myself!

I can brush
my own teeth!

I can pour my own water!

I can walk by myself!
Just let me grow up! [sobs]

I'm tired of being babied!

[Cricket narrating]
We both wanted freedom,
but we were just kids.

What could we do?
Little did we know,

opportunity was just
around the corner.

-I hope we get
a tenant soon, Dawn.
-You said it, Don.

Y'all got an apartment
for rent?

-Well, we'll take it!

How much money
do you have?
Forty cents?

Forty cents?
I wish!

Yeah, and all I have is
my pitiful weekly allowance.

-[cash register rings]
-It's a deal!

So Remy and I
pooled our resources
and started our new lives.

Let's see how Cricket's doing
with the fence.

Where is that boy?

Perhaps you should ask
one of the burly men

moving Cricket's things
out of the house.

Huh? Cricket,
what are you doing-- Oh!

Trying to get this dresser
through the door,

if Mike would tilt
his end this way!

Okay, that's
all of it, boss.

Wait. There's one more
piece of precious cargo.

Me! Let's go!

-Bye, old room. Bye, old man.

Vasquez, I'm moving out.

[gasps] Master Remy,
you're leaving me?

-Don't make it
harder than it is!
-But, Master Remy--

Cricket, you tell me
what the heck is going on
right now!

Tony, hold up.
Spin me.

Well, Dad,
I heard what you said.

As long as
I'm under your roof,

I have to follow your rules.

So I got my own roof.
Remy and I rented an apartment!

But kids can't rent

-Here's the keys to your new
apartment, boys!

Oh! But-- They--
What-- How--

There, there.
No need to get choked up.

You did a good job
raising me.

But now that job
is over. Bye!

-Farewell, brother.
-They grow up so fast.

this is not funny.

-Bye, bye!
-Smell ya later!

You come back home right now
and finish painting the fence!

Bill, wait.

I think we should just...
let him go?

What? Why?

Look, I ran away
when I was a kid,

and after a few hours,
I came running back home

with my tail
between my legs.

This is all part
of growing up.

He'll learn his lesson.
Also, he's right next door.

He'll be back.

[together] Whoa!

Remy? Remy?

I-Is this place
really ours?

Is this real?

Yeah, I...
I think so, Cricket!

Our very own apartment.

I can do things
for myself now!

I can pour my own wa-wa!

That's right, Remy.

And what I want to do
is no chores.

Ever. At all.

-Mmm, okay!

From now on, we live life
however we want!

Whoa! Oof!

Huh. Maybe we should get
some chairs or something.

Did someone order
20 beanbag chairs?

[gasps] You didn't!

And I'm just
getting started!

[Cricket narrating]
We were in paradise!

We had everything
we had wanted and more.

There was no doubt about it.
Me and Remy

were livin' the dream.

[both laughing] Whoa!

-Night, Remy!
-Night, Cricket!

[Cricket claps]

-I can't sleep.
-Me neither!

Let's party!

-[doorbell rings]
-We be here.

-Let's party!

[dance music plays]

-Bup, bup!
Don't forget the cherry.

-Lookin' good, Weezie.
-Snap 'em up, snap 'em in.


-Cricket, old buddy,
this is the life.

-[doorbell rings]
-Ooh, another partygoer.

You're just in time!

Let me show you
around the place.

Hey, there!
Having fun yet?

All right.
Oh, lookin' good.

Here's Santos manning
the tattoo station.

-They're mostly temporary.

Here's the piñata.

Whoa. Sorry, little dude.

No worries, my man.

Anything goes
at my place.

Let me try.

Whoa, cool!

Cricket, do you know
any of these people?

Hey, great party!

-Thanks, Ron.
-Who's Ron?

He's Ron Jr.'s dad.

-Ron Jr.?

That's great,
but I'm just here
to relay a message.

Papa wants to know
when you'll be home.

What? I'm not coming home.
This is paradise!

Well, I'll let Papa know.

Tilly, wait! Stay with us.
You'll be free here!

Does Dad's place have a...
whack-a-mole machine?

No, we have real moles
infesting Papa's garden.

You know that. However,
there are warm meals and hugs

and a nice, clean,
cozy bed.

Our house may not be

but I wouldn't want
to live anywhere else.

Well, I choose paradise.

Splish me, baby! Whoo!

I'll never forget those days.

I wish they could've
lasted forever.

Wow! What a night!

-Remy, wake up.

Day two of your
new life awaits.


Can you bring me
my morning milk?

Get your own
dang milk, Remy.
You're your own man now.

Oh, right. Wow.

Maybe we should
clean up today.

Ooh, that sounds like
chore talk.

Maybe I need
to remind you

that I ain't never
doin' chores, ever!

-Come back here
and paint the fence!

Yeah, no, I'm definitely
not doing any chores.

[chuckles] Okay! More things
for me to do myself. I guess.

[groans] Nancy said Cricket
would've come back by now.

I'd better call her.

-Hey, I'm actually
already here.

Well, I'm getting

It's been a full day,
and Cricket's still
in the apartment.

Yeah. He's lasted way longer
than I thought he would.

Well, what should I do now?
Just keep waiting him out?

What if I never see
my boy again?

Bill, relax.
It'll turn out fine,
I promise.

Oh, I hope so, Nancy.

-I hope so.
-[tapping on pipe]

Oh, Cricket,
this is crazy!

All of our furniture is broken,
and there's trash everywhere!

Well, Remy, it sounds like
now you've got even more stuff

to do by yourself,
just like you wanted.

When I said I wanted
to do things myself,

this wasn't what
I had in mind.

Aah! Ants?
Why are there ants?

That's ant corner.

♪ We don't go to ant corner ♪

-[Mr. Grigorian]
Stop that racket!

My kitty is trying
to enjoy

-his daytime soaps!

-You ain't the boss of me!
I'm a free man!
-Be quiet!

Uh, Cricket, I don't think
you should do that.

Why not? There's no rules
against it! Remember?

We're free!
Aah! Aah! Aah!

Oh, shutter butters!
Now there's a leak?

I... I can't take this.
I can't live like this anymore.

Vasquez, come get me.
I want to go home.

Aw, Remy, come on.
You know you'll be back.

This is freedom!

If this is freedom,

then I think I prefer
to be locked up.

Master Remy,
I have arrived!

Okay, cool.
When you come back,

can you bring
some toilet paper?
We're out.

I'm not coming back!
Vasquez, home!

-Homeward bound.
-Fine! Go!

I don't need you.
I just need... I just need...

this... apartment.

[narrating] Now, I know
what you're thinking.

Things were lookin'
pretty bad.

So I dealt with it
the only way I knew how.

[inhales deeply]
I'm throwing another party!

-[exclaiming, cheering]

Maybe he can
make it on his own.

Your boy's
all grown up, Bill.

[all] Whoo-hoo!
We're here for the par... ty.

Close the door!
You're letting out the pool!

Ew! Cricket,
what happened?

The "cool" party
is now the "pool" party!

Is that sewer water?

No, no, no,
it's just dirty water.

[all exclaiming]

Hey, wait.
Where are you guys going?

Ron! Ron Jr.!
Not you guys too!

Party on, right, Rons?

No, not this time, dude.

No! Come back! Guys!

[gasping, shouting]

Huh? Anoosh, run!

-What have you done?
-What would I do now?

Was I destined
to live out my days

as a humble street urchin?

-[people laughing]

[laughing continues]

Who wants
an ice-cream sundae?

-Yes, please!

-Here ya go, Papa.
-Thanks, sweetie.

Here ya go, son. Oh.

I... I don't think I'm hungry
for ice cream anymore.

-All right. Your loss.
-More for Tilly!

-[all chuckling]
-I'll diet tomorrow.

I gotta try to do something
to get that boy back.

[Bill's voice]
My dearest son,
If you come home,

I'm prepared to offer you

a 50% reduction
in chores.

Just please come home.
Your father...


Your friend, Dad.


Huh. Must be
the moles again. [gasps]

What are you doing?

Couldn't stand to see
this old thing go unpainted.

I mean, I don't want my home
to be a big, old eyesore.

Your... home?

[clears throat]
Your home?

I thought your fancy
new apartment was your home.

Yeah, well, I thought
I could maybe...

have my old room back?

Assuming you didn't, like,
rent it out or something.

Oh, I tried,
believe me.

-Oh, yeah.

Got... lots of offers.

Eh, you're joking.

Glad to have you back, son.

-Hey, what's this paper
in your pocket?
-Huh? Nothing!

So, that's how I learned that
being on your own as a kid

ain't all
it's cracked up to be.

I hope you
learned something.

I didn't even
ask you anything.
You just started talking!


[chickens clucking]

Eat up,
my feathery friends.

Oh, and don't think
I forgot about you, Herbert.

-Oh, hi, Brett.
-Hey ya, Tilly. Whoa!

Well, hello there.
Oh, my.

Man, Tilly, you really have
a way with animals.

That's because I see animals for
who they really are-- people.

You know, I work
at an animal shelter.

You could come down
and volunteer sometime.

You'd get to hang out
with the animals all day

and play with the animals
and feed the animals

-and take care of the animals.
-[gasps] Heaven does exist.

-Yes! Yes! I volunteer
to be a volunteer!
-That's cool.

-There's nothing good on.

Today in world news,

for the first time ever,
nothing happened.

Welcome to
the Chart Channel.

Uh, what up, and welcome back
to the Prank Tank!

Yep, this is what
we're watchin'.

It's me, your boy, Duncan.

For today's
wacky prank, we filled
Principal Johnson's car

with Splish brand soda!

-[air horns blaring]
-Let's check it out.

[humming tune]
What the...

Oh, come on.
What is that, soda?

-Welcome to the Prank Tank!

They got him good.

Oh, man,
I want to prank someone.

-Me too. But who?
-[Bill] Oh, no.

Gosh darn it, Bill.
Did you just nail

your shirt to the fence again?

[exclaiming excitedly]

-I didn't know anyone
was calling today.

Green residence,
Bill Green speaking.

[Cricket's voice, disguised]
Hello, I'm from the Department
of Lost and Found.

-Are you missing anything?
-I don't think so.

What about your butt?

-My butt?
-Yeah, could you do me
a favor and check?

-Well, sure.
-[Cricket, Gramma snickering]

Everything seems to be in ord--
Wait a minute.

-Ha! We got you, Dad!
-[horn blares]

Oh. [chuckles]
I guess you did get me, huh?

Well, thanks for
the laugh, guys.

Think he'll fall
for another one?

Only one way
to find out.

Wow, Brett!
You volunteer here?

No, I get paid.
You volunteer.

Now, let me introduce you
to all the dudes.

-[dogs barking]
-Everyone, raise a paw

-for our newest volunteer,
Tilly Green!

They're wonderful!

Each one is absolutely

Whoa. Uh, uh, okay.

if everyone was adorable,
then no one would be.

And... Oh! [gasps]

Oh, my goodness.

Well, aren't you
a charming fellow?

I think I'll call you

And we will be
friends... forever.

-[squirrel chittering]
-[dogs barking]

[laughs] Oh, Ivanhoe,
you're so much fun.

Don't tell anyone...
[whispers] but you're
my favorite.

Wow, Tilly!
I'm impressed!

-You'll do great today
at the adoption fair.
-Adoption fair?

Our goal is to find the animals
loving homes

and, you know,
say goodbye forever.

Say goodbye forever?

Goodbye, Tilly!

[chuckles] Oh, no!

-[humming tune] Aah!

Bill, come outside!
I need your help.

Oh, gosh!
I'm coming!

Ma, I'm here!
What's wrong?

Son, I dropped my precious
war medal down the hose,

and I just can't
get it out.

Oh, well, let me
take a look at it.

All right. I just...

Keep lookin', Dad. It's gotta
be in there somewhere.


I don't think
it's in there, Ma.

Of course it ain't,
you fool!

-You just got pranked again!
-[horn blows]

[both laughing]

Ah, come on, Dad.

We're not laughing at you,
we're laughing with you.

But I'm not laughing.

I said, I...
Ah, forget it.

-Aw, she's so cute!
-Good boy!

So remember, Tilly,
it's up to you to
interview these folks

to determine what's best
for the animals.

Let's get
to the adoptions!

Well, if it's up to me...
then bring 'em on.

Oh, man, this guy
is so punk rock,

and we would love
to adopt him.

I'm sorry, but your lifestyle
is far too alternative.

Application rejected.

Ooh-hoo-hoo-hoo! I love
how much energy he has!

It's actually
nervous energy.

You make him nervous.

Daddy, I love how drooly
and huggable she is.

She's clearly allergic to you,
so you can't have her.

Aw, too bad.

Another adoptee
not up to snuff.

I guess no one's
getting adopted today.


[Gramma] Bill!
Bill, get in here!

What's this
giant cake for?

Cricket and I felt bad
about all the pranks,

so we baked you
this apology cake.

Wait. Is this
another prank?

Why don't you come closer
and see for yourself?

It's a large cake
that Cricket's
obviously hiding in.

-No, thank you.
-[horn blares]

-[both laughing]

[seethes] That's it!

I enjoy fun as much
as the next person.

But you know
what's really fun?
Trusting your family.

And now my fun is ruined.
The fun of trust. "Frust."

I'm gonna take a bath,
and I'm not coming out

until I can
"frust" you again.


-That really got to ya, huh?

I'm just bummed we didn't
set up any pranks
in the bathroom.

Well, how about we set up
a prank outside the bathroom.

[gasps] I'm proud
to call you Gramma.

excuse my temper,

but why in the heckity-heck
did you reject

every adoption
applicant today?

I'm sorry,
but they all stunk.

I just want to find
each animal the perfect
home that they deserve.

Okay. Then let me
introduce you to...

the perfect family.

-♪ Hello ♪
-♪ Hello ♪

-♪ Hello ♪
-♪ Hello ♪

We're the Bardekoff family!

Oh. Uh, okay.

Oh, my goodness!
Ivanhoe is so cute!

Okay, well, let's not
get ahead of ourselves.

First, I gotta ask y'all
a few questions.

We love questions!

What do you plan on
feeding this fine dog?

As the chef of
a five-star restaurant,

I'll prepare him only
the finest of canine cuisine.

Okay, but will you be able to
give Ivanhoe ample attention?

Oh, yes.
We home-school our children,

so we'll be there to
love him all the time.

-Will you give him walks?
-Morning, noon, and night.

-Any allergies?
-We're allergic to
not owning a dog!

-Y-Your vet?

-That'd be me!
-But-- But--

-will you love him
more than I do?
-Of course!


-Oh, my goodness!
-Little girl!

-Don't touch me.
-What'd I tell ya, Tilly?

They're perfect.

I guess they are.

All right, Bardekoffs,

Tilly will get you
all set up and ready to go.

I'll just go
spruce him up for ya.

-Wait here just a moment.

Oh. I thought you dudes
would've left by now.

Well, 240 minutes ago,

that little girl told us
she'd be just a minute.

Hmm. Tilly,
are you in here? What?

The dudes!
The dudes are gone!

Oh, geez!
What happened? Huh?

[Tilly's voice reading note]

[Brett] Tilly?

I said I'd give the animals
a home, and I did.

-[all barking]
-My home!



Uh, you will all get along,

-[panicked clucking]



[Tilly, Gramma snickering]

Dad, come quick!
I need you out here!

Uh, yeah,
I don't think so.

I ain't fallin'
for another prank.

Dang, he's getting

-What's that noise?

What the heck is that?

[gasps, exclaiming]

Come on, boy!
We gotta get away!

I-I can't!
It's too slippery!

[snuffling, sniffing]

It's searching for us.

-[pounding on door]
-Bill! Bill!

Dad, open the door!
There's a horrible
monster out here!

Oh, yeah. Sure.
I won't be fooled again.

-Dad, we're serious this time!
It's not a prank!
-We swear!

[humming tune]

Daddy, help me!

You're kin now.

You need to act
accordingly! [gasps]

-Oh, no!

When Miss Brenda's
she gets all kicky.

Don't worry!
I'll save you! Aah!


Wow! That was, like,
great timing!

Brett! Oh!

-Little dude-ette,
what is the deal?

I thought this would be
the perfect compromise.

The animals get a home,
and I don't have to say goodbye.

Look, Tilly, I know
it's hard to say goodbye,

but that's what's best
for these dudes.

Look around.
Would you really
approve this adoption?




No, I suppose not.

[sighs] Tilly Green,
your adoption application

has been officially...

I'm a failure.

Oh, come on, kid,
don't be so hard
on yourself.

Let's round up these animals
and take 'em back
to the shelter.

[gasps] Actually, Brett,
I may have a better idea.

Whoa! Hey!

Oh, my goodness!

-♪ Hello ♪
-♪ Hello ♪

-♪ Hello ♪
-♪ Hello ♪


I finally spruced him up
for y'all.

Sorry it took so long.

-Oh-ho-ho, Ivanhoe!
-Welcome to the family.

[all laughing]

You know, Brett,
It hurts to watch them go,

but it also feels
kind of nice.

Ah! You get it now.
You started off rough,

but now you've got the makings
of the perfect volunteer.

Ahh! Just what I needed.
Oh, my gosh!


You were telling
the truth?

Well, I hope you two
learned your lesson

and think twice about
pranking me again.

[coughs] learned.

Yeah, I uh,
can't move my body.

Oh, gosh, son.
Here, let me help you up.

Thanks, Dad. I... Yaah!

Ha, ha! You just got
pranked by your papa!

Okay. You next, Ma.

Ah, what the heck.

Okay, now Cricket again.
-[Cricket] Ugh, fine.

-[electricity zaps]
-[Bill laughs]

♪ I got sweat in my eyes ♪

♪ I lost a bet and got bit
By a hundred flies ♪

♪ And I fell out
A big, old tree ♪

♪ Hit every branch
And scraped up both my knees ♪

♪ A got chased by a dog
Bit by a frog ♪

♪ Got a rash on my legs
Dropped a dozen eggs ♪

♪ I got splinters
At seven and 10 ♪

♪ And tomorrow
I'll do it all again ♪