Big City Greens (2018–…): Season 1, Episode 2 - Cricket Versus/Blue Tater - full transcript

Cricket must wrestle a wild animal in order to prove himself worthy of the Green family name.


♪ One, two, three, four ♪

♪ La la la la,
la la la la ♪

♪ La la la la ♪


[hen clucks]

Today's the day!

Today's the day.

Today's the day!

Tilly, today's the day!

Ha ha ha ha ha!

Five more minutes.

Dad, wake up!

-Today's the day!

Today's the day!
Today's the day!


Today's the day.

-Today's the day!

[whispers] Gramma.
Today's the day.

Hee hee hee hee!

What's goin' on, Cricket?

I made y'all grits
this mornin' as a celebration

'cause today is the day
I earn the Green family name!

Ho ho! Right. The old
Green Family Rite of Passage.

For generations, each member
of our family has set off
on a quest

to wrestle the toughest,
meanest animal around

in order to truly earn
the Green family name.

As well as earn a place on
the Green Family Triumph Quilt.

Each patch represents a Green
defeating a vicious animal.

There's your sister
taming a wild horse.

Frederico was a good horse
of great moral character.

And here's your father
as a child

taming a hawk.

Ha! Nearly tore me in half.

Hey! Even Mom
has a patch.

Yep, somewhere between
the wedding and the honeymoon,

she wrestled a wolverine.

And now it's my turn.

I'm gonna wrestle
the wildest animal
this city's got.

[Gramma] Now, remember.

The rules state that you must
pin an animal

for the count of three
before the sun sets.

Do you have
what it takes, boy,

or are you all lip?

Get your sewin' fingers ready,

'cause today I'm becomin'
an official Green!


Yay! Ay-yi-yi!

Go git 'em, Cricket.

More for Tilly.

Cricket Green--

Well, just Cricket
until he earns his last name--

is a world-class
animal wrangler,

and a master of

[gags, spits]
Got dirt in my mouth.

Cricket roams the cityside
searching for the wild beast
he is destined to defeat.

Aha! I got you now!

My slippers!

-Realizing he's outmatched,

Cricket makes his escape.

You might want to get
a rabies shot.

[man] For the last time,

there is no dragon
at Food Dragon.

You can't hide him
from me forever!

Nope. No, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Ohh, man. This rite of passage
is pretty difficult in the city.

Never let your guard down!

Never let your guard down.

Hey, Gramma,

let's say I don't pin
an animal by sundown.

What happens then?

Well, then,

you wouldn't be
a Green anymore.

You'd have to change your name
to something stupid,

like Hawking or Einstein.

But that ain't gonna happen.
Is it?

Ha! You kiddin' me?
I just gotta find
new huntin' grounds.

That's the attitude.

Now put your clothes back on.
You look ridiculous.

The park
is a perfect place

to find a vicious
animal opponent.

All right, kiddo,
let's see what you've got.

[Cricket] Hmm, let's see here,
a couple of baby birds, nah,

swarm of ants, unh. Aha!

Okay, Buttercup.

♪ Yum-yum time ♪

♪ It's time for yum-yums ♪

♪ Get into your
big horse tum-tums ♪

Here's your chance, boy.

Strike while your prey
is distracted.


♪ It's time for yum-yums ♪

Hm. Mmm.


Careful, child!
Buttercup spooks easily!


Buttercup, remember
your training...!

What happened back there?

Just lost my grip.
Silky mane.

Well, hurry and find
something else.

Hmm. Hmm?

What about
that vicious creature?


Are you kiddin' me?

Wild animals
ain't on leashes!

-[squirrel chattering]

Aha! You're mine,
furry demon!

Hyaah! Yay! Grr! Grr!

One, two, three!

Hah! I-I did it.

I'm a Green.
Right, Gramma?

Oh, of course... Not!

[gasp] Hey!

If you think
pinning a squirrel

is an "accomplishment,"

when I completed
the Family Rite of Passage,

-I fought a bear!
-[bear roars]

-Bears are basically
real-life monsters.
- Exactly!

I don't know if there's
an animal in this city
that'll work, Gramma.

A true Green
is cunning and clever,

so figure something out!


If cunning and clever
is what Gramma wants,

then that's what she'll get.

[Tilly] Sing with me, Papa.

♪ 'Cause it's fun, fun, fun ♪

♪ Fun, fun, fun ♪

Yeah, okay, I'm gettin' it.

♪ Fun, fun, fun, fun ♪

Oh, yeah!


fellow Greens.

What happened?

Oh, nothin'...

if you think
fightin' a lion is nothin'.

A lion?!

Did you die?

It was crazy.

A vicious lion
escaped from the zoo

and was running
down the street

biting chunks of people
right off!

I knew destiny brought me
and this lion together
for a reason: to fight!

I jumped right at him,
but he swiped at my face,

so I threw him down
and I put him in a headlock!

So, I suppose that wraps up
my Family Rite of Passage.

Oh, really?

I didn't hear any news
about an escaped lion.

Uh, you probably
didn't hear about it
'cause, uh, well,

the police wanted to keep
the whole thing quiet.

That so?

What'd his breath smell like?

How many claws did he have?

Uh, well, I--


Oh, jeez, Ma!

Oh, relax, Bill,
it's just ketchup!

This boy had you tangled
in a twisted web of lies!

All right, you caught me!
I've tried and tried

to complete this stupid
Family Rite of Passage,
and it's impossible!

I'm done!

Ya quittin'?
Greens don't give up!

Then I guess I'm not a Green!


♪ Fun, fun, fun, fun,
fun, fun, fun, fun-- ♪

Did I misread the room?




So, uh, Cricket,

would you like some
green bean casserole?

This casserole

is a family recipe
for Greens only!

What?! But green bean
casserole's my favorite!

Don't worry. You can have
all the canned corn you want.

You serious?
Canned corn is the worst!

Come on, Ma,
let the boy eat
what he wants, huh?

Fine! I'll just add it
to his room and board tab.

I gotta pay rent now?
How the heck and I
supposed to do that?!

You'll just have
to get a job.

There's always more room
in the coal mines.

This is ridiculous!
I'm outta here!

Just 'cause you didn't eat it

don't mean I won't
charge you for it!

[door opens, slams shut]

More for Tilly.

Stupid Gramma.

Stupid Green Rite of Passage.

If I'm not a Green...

then what am I?

[Bill] Aw, Ma, why are you bein'
so hard on the boy?

He's your grandson.

Can't you be
a little easier on him?

No! This is important, Bill.

Every Green has done it.

What would my grandmother say

if a Green didn't go through
the Rite of Passage?

She wrestled five boars!

Five boars!

Psssh. Ten boars ain't
as scary as you, Gramma.

Wait a minute.


Alice Delores Green!

Hmph. I ain't got the time
for a no-grit non-Green quitter.

Listen, I thought
I couldn't do this

because there weren't
any ferocious animals
in the city,

but I was wrong.

The meanest,
most vicious creature

was right in front of me
this whole time.

I challenge you
to wrestle me

for my Green Family
Rite of Passage!

Hee hee!

Well, all right.

Congratulations on finding
a worthy opponent.

But you still gotta pin me
by sundown!

-[joints cracking]

Bring it on, ya old boot!

[both groaning]



Aah! Blech!


Aha! Yah!

[both shouting, grunting]

Is that all you got?


Aren't you just a cutie?



-[feedback squeals]


Got your wooden leg!

I could beat you
with no limbs!

[both shouting, grunting]


-Stop fighting!
-You don't have to do this!

I'll put you
on the quilt myself!

Don't get involved!

I'm wrestling the toughest beast
in the city!



[both] Cricket!


Had enough?

Cricket, you can't beat Gramma,
and you know it.

Just end this foolishness!

You're right, Dad.

I can't beat Gramma.

-And I don't need to!

All this time I was trying
to get on this quilt

because that's how things
are done in this family.

But I don't care if you
don't consider me a Green,

'cause I feel like a Green.

I know I'm a Green.

And that's something no one
can ever take away from me.

Boy, I'm proud of you.

It takes real grit
to stand up to family--


Never let your guard down!

Aah! Are you crazy?

Papa, start the count.

One, two,


Admit it, Gramma.
You're pinned!

Uh, I'm pinned.

I knew you had it in you...

Cricket Green.

Now git offa me!

I am Cricket Green!


Aw, glad to see you two
are gettin' along again.


Round two!

[both shouting, grunting]


Okay, okay, okay, wait.

One more time,
all of nothin'.

If you say so,

but my lucky coin
always comes up heads.

Tails, tails, tails,
tails, tails, tails!

Heads again?!

It's just not your day,

Eh, well, a bet's a bet.

-[brakes screech]
-[Irish music playing]

Taco the mornin' to ya!

Whazza whazza,
who's that?

Come check out
me lucky corned beef burritos

at today's
Food Truck Round-Up!

[tires screech]

What the-- Ooh!

What kind of
ice cream truck was that?

[Tilly] Cricket,
that was a food truck.

Food... truck?
Ya mean... ?

It's exactly
what you think it is.

Oh... my... gravy!


- Dad I have an idea!

-[plate shatters]
-Food trucks?

-Cricket, you just ate.

Think about it.

We got a garden full
of plants.

That's basically food.

And we got our truck.

That's basically a truck.

We should start
a food truck!

I can't believe
I'm sayin' this,

but that's
a great idea, son!

Potatoes are in season.

I could make french fries.

-I'm on it!

-Ooh! Hee hee hee!

Time for
a good old-fashioned

tater tug!

Come on!

[upbeat banjo music playing]

Hah! Ahh!



What the--


Hey, look
at this stupid blue potato.

Cricket, don't touch it!

And... boop.


What's the matter
with ya, boy?!

I don't know!
Lots of stuff, I guess!

Ain't ya ever heard
that curse

-of the blue tater?!
-[horror movie stinger]

-The curse of the blue tater

has haunted
country folk for years!

Whoever possesses
a blue tater

-is cursed!

Cursed with bad luck

-and misfortune!


It's done terrible,
terrible deeds

to everyone
who crosses its path.

[horses whinnying]

That spud is bad news,

You've brought
great misfortune
to us all!

Aw, don't be ridiculous,

It's just a potato.

But if it makes
you feel better,

there, gone forever.

What a nice day.


And that is the end
of th--

Aah! The tater!

Oh, no! It came back!

The curse is real?!

Of course it's real,
ya dingbat!

Mm mm mm...

What do we do?

How do you break the curse?

We need to perform
a special ritual.

I need snake venom,
dirt from a fresh grave,

and sour cream.

I have the first two
in my purse,

but your sister
keeps eatin'
all my sour cream,

which I need
for my taquitos!

What's that now?

Can't we just destroy it?

No! If you destroy it,

the curse is permanent!

You'll have bad luck
for the rest of your life!

-Hey, where'd it go?
-[gasp] It's gone!


Alrighty then.

Dad! Dad! Dad! Dad!

The b-buh-b-buh-b-blue

Oh, yeah! Heh heh.
Looks pretty stupid, huh?

-Don't touch it! It's cursed!

It'll melt your skin off!

And then your eyeballs
will fall out!

And then your blood
will curdle into cheese!

Aw, Gramma's been fillin'
your head with nonsense again.

There's no such thing
as bad luck.

Besides, I need every potato
available to make fries.


Aw, don't kiss it!!

Anyway, quit your worryin'.

And check out
the new and improved
Green family food truck!

It was easy.

Just put a bunch of our kitchen
appliances in my truck.

I even thought
of the perfect name for it.

"It's... French Fries."


Aw, ain't she pretty.

Yeah, she's pretty!
Pretty dangerous!

This whole thing
is a death trap!

This could fall
on someone!

-This could burn
someone's face off!

And this could, um...

get in your eyes
and sting 'em!

The curse is real!

Oh, for Pete's sake,
knock it off.

I need everyone's help today.

I don't wanna
hear one more word
about this curse business.

-But, Dad...
-Not. One.

Ma! Tilly! Time to go!

It's french fry time!


Tilly! Wait!

you're my favorite sibling.

I can't let you go
to the food trucks.

But I wanted to eat tacos
and smell the diesel.

Oh, sweet sister,
it's too perilous.

Hmm. I'll use
my lucky coin to guide me!

If it's heads I go,
tails I stay.

Guess I'm goin'.

Thank you for decidin'
my fate, lucky coin.

-All right, boy, listen up!

I got a plan.

Once we're at
the Food Truck Round-Up,

I can get some sour cream
to complete the ritual.

But until then,
what do we do about the curse?

[horse whinnying]

Boy, it's up to you now
to protect this family.

-[engine starts]
-Now chop, chop!

Everybody in!

All right, everybody ready
for a safe and uneventful ride?

Uh, sure, I guess.

Food Truck Round-Up,
here we come!

Okay, just wait one second!

Are you buckled in?

-Is this tight enough?

Cricket, would you
sit down, please? Ooh!

Huh. Must have
put it in reverse.

Weird. I've never
done that before.

I can fix that later.

Not gonna
let this get us down!

The curse!

Ohhh whoa!

Gotta keep my eyes peeled
for any danger.

Oh, no, a pothole!

-Look out!
-What are you--


Cricket, we been through
this a hundred times.

When I'm drivin',

-ya don't grab the wheel!
-[horn honking]

All right, not too bad.

We can still make it
to the Round-up.

Aah! Aw, what now?!

Okay, that's it
for the knives.

What's this here now?

-Too dangerous!
-[bottles break]


For safety, Dad.

We can't predict
when bad luck will strike,

but if we stay on guard
for the rest of our lives--

That's it, boy!

-Come on!
-Give it here!


Oh oh oh oh oh!

Whoa! Unh!

Aw! My delicious
homemade honey mustard.

[pigeons squawking]

Ow! Ooh! Aah!


Ah, no! No, no, no, no!

-Hey, shoo!

Leave this man alone!

Whew! Thanks, officer.

No problem! I noticed you
were in a no-parking zone.

Here's your ticket!

[furious grumbling]

[dramatic music playing]

The curse is real!

Oh, my gosh! I'm cursed!
I'm cursed!

the Food Truck Round-up!

My life is being destroyed
by an evil potato!

Aw, man,
I made Dad go crazy.


All this happened
because I'm cursed.

It's that tater's fault!

Oh, no, that's
not true, Cricket.

This is all your fault.

Thanks, Tilly,
that's really understand--
Wait. Come again?

Cricket, why did Papa hit
the porch with the truck?

-The tater!

It's 'cause
you distracted him.

And why did we hit
the telephone pole?

-The tater!
-No, that was you, too.

And who wrestled with Papa,

got him covered in sauce,

attacked by pigeons,
and in trouble
with the law?

That darn-- Hmm.

I guess that was me, too.

Cricket, we aren't
controlled by luck.

For instance,
you know my lucky coin

that always comes up heads?

I just glued
two pennies together.

We make our own luck.

Okay, maybe you're
on to somethin'.

Okay, potato,
what do you want from me?

Tell me what you want!


-You leave my dad alone!

I'll deal with you later,
tater. Hmm!

Hey! What are you doin'?!
Tryin' to upset the potato?!

You put too much
into this truck
for us to give up now!

Curse or no,
I ain't ready to quit!

But we can't fight
the curse!

Well, that's why
we don't fight back.

We'll push back.

[grunting] Get...



Aw, come on. You can't
push the truck by yourself.


Well, then
let's give him a hand.


Well, all right.

Ma, keep the truck
in neutral.

Yeah, yeah, I'm on it!

Let's do this!

[all grunting]

[inspiring music playing]

Come on!

[all grunting]

Should we help them?

They don't need us.

They're a family
workin' together.

They can overcome anything.

[all grunting]


[bike bell jingles]

-We made it to the top!

And, look, the Food Truck
Round-up is right there!

I guess it's all
downhill from here.


The truck!

Don't worry.
Gramma's steerin'.

No, I'm not.

I got out for the hug.

But I guess I missed it!


Guys, come on! Jump in!

[all screaming]


Whoa! The truck looks great!

[all] Oooh!


The truck! It flies?!

No! It fries!

It french fries!

[all] Whoa!

[all grunt]


Hey, look! We made it
to the Round-Up!

Our luck
really turned around!

Nah, we made our own luck.

You guys do french fries?

So cool. I love fries.

Can you feed me
some yummy fries?

Oh, uh, yes,
comin' right up, sir.

-[ominous music playing]
-Oh! Uh...

Cricket! Wait!

Unh! I stole
this sour cream!

We can remove the curse!

Don't destroy it,

or you'll be cursed
with bad luck forever!

It's just a potato,

soon to be a french fry.





Uh... [nervous laugh]


[peeler's blade rings]

That fry is blue!

Hey, cool! Must be
good luck or something.

I love
your perspective on life.

[all] Whew!

Hey! I want to try
a lucky blue fry!

Oh, yeah, sure,
of course!

[overlapping chatter]

Hey! Who took me
big old bucket
of sour cream?!

♪ I got sweat in my eyes ♪

♪ Lost a bet and got
Bit by a hundred flies ♪

♪ I fell out a big ol' tree ♪

♪ Hit every branch
And scraped up both my knees ♪

♪ I got chased by a dog ♪

♪ Bit by a frog
Got a rash on my leg ♪

♪ Dropped a dozen eggs ♪

♪ I got splinters
At seven and ten ♪

♪ And tomorrow
I'll do it all again ♪