Bewitched (1964–1972): Season 7, Episode 15 - Mary, the Good Fairy - full transcript
When Mary the Good Fairy, an old friend of Samantha's, visits Tabitha, Samantha gives her a bit too much brandy and she has to take her place.
[♪]
Hi, sweetheart. You're home early.
Hi.
I had to pick this up.
What is it?
It's a Reducealator.
A...? A what-alator?
Reducealator.
It's a prototype for
a brand-new product.
And I've gotta come up
with a mind-blowing ad campaign
by the day after tomorrow.
How's it work?
Well, I'll tell you what.
I'll demonstrate it
for you. Don't go away.
[♪]
Mommy, Mommy!
It's almost out. Look.
Who tied the string onto it?
Sidney. He was gonna pull it,
but I didn't trust him.
You pull it, Mommy.
Oh... Uh...
You've gotta be brave,
Mommy. Come on.
Oh, okay. R-ready?
One, two...
I can't do it.
Maybe you better
close your eyes.
Yeah. Oh...
Oh, okay.
One, two... DARRIN: Okay, Sam.
Ooh!
It's out, Mommy.
It's out.
Look, Daddy.
Hey. How
about that?
How about that?
Can I go over and show Sidney?
Sidney?
Uh, y-you remember.
Mrs. Kravitz's nephew.
He's here visiting again.
Please?
All right, sweetheart,
but come right back.
[♪]
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
How does it look?
Well, I-I'm sorry, sweetheart,
but it does take a bit
of getting used to.
The great thing about it
is it's completely portable.
Women can wear it
while doing the housework.
Oh.
You can...
whittle away
the pounds as you go.
Hey! You want a good
slogan for it?
What?
"Whittle while
you work."
"Whittle while you work?"
I think it's cute.
"Whittle while you work?"
Forget it.
[NARRATOR READING
On-SCREEN TEXT]
[♪]
[♪]
[♪]
Mommy, Mommy.
I'm never gonna play
with Sidney again.
Well, what did he do now?
He says there's no such thing
as the Good Fairy.
He says it's the parents
who put the money
under your pillow.
That isn't true, is it, Daddy?
Well, uh, actually, uh...
Isn't it getting
awfully hot in here?
Not for mothers.
Well, no wonder.
Heh.
I-I left this on high.
I'd better get out
of this contraption.
[♪]
Is Sidney right?
Do mommies put the money
under your pillow?
Come here, sweetheart.
Tabitha, actually,
you're both right.
It's all a matter of believing.
If you really believe
and want the Good Fairy
to come, she will.
Otherwise, mommies
and daddies do her job.
Oh, goody.
That means the Good Fairy
is coming here tonight.
Right. Now,
you run up
and get ready for your bath.
Okay.
[SPANKS LIGHTLY]
Good night, Daddy.
Good night, honey.
Sam.
[SIGHS]
Do you think it's a good idea
to fill her head with
all that nonsense?
What nonsense?
About the Good Fairy.
Well, for your information,
it is not nonsense.
What?
No, I happen to know
the Good Fairy personally.
Her name's Mary.
You mean, she's a witch?
No.
She's a good fairy.
Y-you... You mean, with, uh...?
With wings and a magic wand
and the...?
The whole works?
Of course.
You're not putting me on?
Witch's honor.
A simple "I swear" will do.
I swear.
[♪]
Sam.
Uh, did you just hear something?
Yes. I heard you
wake me up.
[YAWNS] I must have
been dreaming.
[GRUNTS]
As long as I'm up...
I think I'll go downstairs
and get myself a glass of milk.
You want anything?
Yes. I wanna go
back to sleep.
Now, be quiet, and don't
wake up the kids.
[♪]
Ow!
Shh.
[GROANING]
Shh!
[DOOR CLOSES]
Shh.
Sam?
[GRUNTS]
Shh.
Sam.
SAMANTHA:
Now, what is it?
We have... company.
Oh! Oh, Mary.
Oh, Samantha.
Oh, brother.
I knew it was a witch's house,
but I had no idea it was yours.
[GIGGLES]
Oh, uh...
Uh, ours.
Uh, this is my husband, Darrin.
Oh.
How do you do?
How do you...?
Shh.
It's been ages.
Come on downstairs
and sit a while.
I would love to.
You know, the cold
bothers me more and more.
It seems to get into my bones.
How about a nice cup of tea?
I could certainly use
something to warm me up.
I don't know about tea though.
Uh, coffee?
Coffee doesn't agree with me.
How about a drop of brandy?
What's brandy?
It's a very good
warmer-upper.
Ooh! Well then,
that certainly
should agree with me.
Come on.
Are you happy, my dear?
Very.
You don't miss the old life?
SAMANTHA: Well, I-I
don't get a chance to.
The old life keeps
dropping in here
with amazing regularity.
Oh, how nice.
[CHUCKLES]
Here we are.
Thank you.
Mm-hm.
[SIGHING CONTENTEDLY]
What's this called?
Brandy?
Yes. How do you like it?
Very much.
Say when.
I hope you don't mind
my popping in on you
like this, Samantha.
But I really am so tired.
So I thought I would drop in
to a witch's house
and just rest up.
Oh, my goodness
gracious. Ha.
I forgot to say when.
Oh, well.
This has to keep me warm
all night long.
[♪]
[COOING]
Ooh. Ooh, ooh, ooh.
This is nice
and warming. Hah.
Uh... Uh, Mary, why don't you
let me fix you
a little something to eat?
How about a nice chicken
or roast beef sandwich?
I really should be going.
Roast beef?
I-it'll only take
a minute.
[BOTH CHUCKLE NERVOUSLY]
[GIGGLES]
Oh, well, I'll, uh,
just put this back.
Oh, here.
[♪]
You might as well
take the glass too.
It's so good.
[ADAM CRYING]
Oh, that's Adam.
I'll go up, Sam.
Excuse me.
SAMANTHA:
Here we are.
I really should be leaving.
I just dread going out
in that weather.
Although that brandy
really did warm me up.
Sam. Adam won't
go back to sleep
until Mommy kisses him
good night.
Oh, uh, e-excuse me.
[♪]
Uh, Sam.
How long is
she gonna hang around?
Well, I can't ask her to leave.
I can.
You be nice.
Okay. Okay.
Well, feeling
a little warmer now?
Except for my toes.
[LAUGHS]
Although I...
I really don't think
I should have any more
of that brandy.
As they say, if you're
going to fly, heh,
don't drink.
Hm?
It's a mortal joke.
Oh.
I like mortals.
They're... They're
so friendly.
You. You have been
very "hospid-ibidle."
Hospidib...
You're a good host.
It's my pleasure.
[LAUGHING]
Far be it for me
to spoil your pleasure.
Sure. Here.
Hm.
[COOING]
Hey! There
go my toes!
Whee!
Uh, h-how are
we doing?
You know, Samantha,
you are married
to a beautiful person.
A gorgeous, beautiful person.
I only wish I could get
a gorgeous hunk of mortal
like that for myself.
Uh... Uh, Mary, I think
you'd better sit down.
Nope! Just beginning to
feel the tips of my toes.
Watch this.
Stand back.
Stand back.
[♪]
[COOING]
Ooh.
Did you ever see me do
the White Swan?
[COOING]
Whee!
She's crocked.
Darrin!
The Good Fairy
doesn't get crocked.
Hey!
How'd she get so crocked
on just two drinks?
Mary, pull yourself together.
[COOING]
I-it's terribly late,
and you said you had a long
list of children to visit.
No. Not going out
in the cold.
B-but, Mary.
Y-you have to.
You're the Good Fairy.
All those children
are counting on you.
Now, you can't disappoint them.
Why not? What did
they ever do for me?
[GASPS]
She doesn't know
what she's saying.
Here's a list of the children.
Never forget you
for what you're doing.
What do you mean?
Doing what?
Oh. Well...
Well, you... You...
You don't think I'm gonna do it?
If you don't,
kindly tell me who.
[♪]
Well, well. Th...
That does it.
Darrin, I have no choice.
I-I have to substitute
for her.
Why?
Well, we're responsible
for her condition.
She didn't even know
what brandy was.
Someone's gotta make her rounds.
Mary. Uh, Mary,
wake up.
No.
Mary, please.
Uh, just so we can
make the switch.
Okay.
[♪]
Beautiful.
Samantha, you look
absolutely, eh...
Well? How do
I look?
If anyone had ever told me
that someday I'd be married
to the Good Fairy,
I'd have punched them
right in the mouth.
[GIGGLES]
H-how about a little kiss
on the cheek instead?
[LAUGHS]
[♪]
Well, I guess I'd better give
these wings a trial run.
Why do you need the wings?
Uh, can't you just?
The Good Fairy is not a witch.
And for the time being,
I happen to be the Good Fairy.
She doesn't have
the powers to fly.
That's why they gave her wings.
Who gave her wings?
Whoever gives out the wings.
Sorry I asked.
So... as long as I have
these wings on me,
witchery is out.
Yeah?
It's almost worth it.
[♪]
Tsk.
Abner? Abner!
Oh, what is it?
There's a mosquito
in Sidney's room.
Well, as long as
it doesn't bite Sidney,
it's got nothing to worry about.
[CRICKETS CHIRPING]
Abner.
Abner, wake up.
Oh, what is it now?
Oh! You should
see this!
I-it... It's
Mrs. Stephens.
She's got this, uh, flimsy
little thing on, like...
Like a ballet dancer.
A-and she's got these fake wings
in the back, and...
Abner! They're not
fake wings!
She's flying!
Gladys, if you wake
me up once more,
you'll be flying too.
[♪]
[♪]
Oh, Samantha.
Oh.
H-how did you do?
Oh, fine.
Except I am exhausted.
Well, now you have some idea
of what I go through.
Did you have
any trouble sleeping?
It's the first
good night's sleep
I've had in centuries.
Do you have any idea
what a relief it is
not to sleep on your wings?
Yeah, I can imagine.
[♪]
[GRUNTS]
[MOANING]
Oh, what a luxury.
Huh.
Can't do this with wings either.
Mary, I have to get my family up
and start the day,
so come on, let's change back.
Well, c...
Hurry up, Mary.
I have a lot to do.
[♪]
Um...
Samantha...
I've been collecting teeth
and giving out coins
for centuries.
I'm sick of it.
If I never see
another kid's tooth
for the rest of my life,
I'll be delighted.
Uh... Well, what
are you saying?
Don't you think I'm entitled
to a little vacation?
Well, sure, but I'm...
Well, I'm taking one.
At least for a while.
And in the meantime, you're it.
But, well, you...
You can't do this.
I-I have responsibilities.
I-I have a husband and children.
Sure. And now that I've
unloaded this dumb job,
maybe I'll get a crack at
some of the goodies too.
[IRRITATED]
You have no right to do this.
Maybe your husband has a friend?
Mary!
[♪]
Sam?
What?
What? What?
What's all the trouble?
Trouble?
Mm-hm. Oh, no. No... No trouble.
Well, look, Sam, I'd like...
[MOANS]
What is she doing?
Scratching her back.
[SIGHS]
Uh... Uh, look, Sam,
I'd like to get to the office
a little early this morning, so
uh, would you mind, uh,
getting out of that rig
and making some breakfast?
Oh, well, I-if
you're in a hurry,
I won't take the time to change.
Uh, look, Sam...
if it's all the same to you,
I'd rather you shed
those wings right now.
Now?
Y-you mean this minute?
Mommy, Mommy.
Mommy, when did you
get to be the Good Fairy?
Very recently.
Wow. Wait till
I tell Sidney.
Tab... Tabitha,
for the time being,
I think we ought to keep this
a family secret.
Gee whiz. Everything good
that happens here is a secret.
Oh, well, I'm sorry about that.
You run out on the patio and
play. I'll get you breakfast.
Okay.
[♪]
Okay, Sam.
What is it you're
trying not to tell me?
Maybe you'd rather
hear it after breakfast.
Uh, if it's bad news, it'll
sit better on an empty stomach.
Well, um...
Mary is being very obstinate.
She doesn't wanna be
the Good Fairy anymore.
B-but you're a witch.
Uh, slap a spell on her.
Boil up a potion.
Fire a two-broom salute.
Darrin, there is nothing
I can do about it.
Sam, this is the most
ridiculous thing
that's ever happened to us.
It's preposterous.
Why are you so uptight?
I'm the one that's stuck
with these dumb wings.
Furthermore, you are
just as much to blame as I am.
Well, Sam, I'm sorry.
I-I didn't mean to
yell at you.
But you've got to admit
that this...
Don't do that!
I... I beg
your pardon?
Those wings are very delicate.
You've got to be gentle
with them.
Suppose a man wants to hug you?
What do you do?
Nothing. Now you know why
they call me the Good Fairy.
Terrific.
Sam, what are we going to do?
You can't hide out forever.
Suppose somebody
sees those wings.
Well... you've always said
that I'm an angel.
Now I'll look the part.
That's something I've always
admired in you, Sam:
The way you can smile
in the face of...
disaster.
[CLEARS THROAT]
[COOS]
A little chill in the air
this morning, isn't there?
[♪]
[DOORBELL RINGS]
It's the Kravitzes.
And Sidney.
Sam, quick, you better duck.
And take the Good Fairy
with you.
Come on, Mary.
Come on.
No. I'm not the Good Fairy
anymore.
I'm staying right here
to meet the people.
Oh!
Tell them she's my aunt,
and get rid of them
as fast as you can.
[♪]
Hi.
Hi, Mr. Stephens.
Can Sidney play with Tabitha?
Sure. Uh, she hasn't
had breakfast yet, but...
Oh, that's wonderful.
Sidney, you just got
an invitation to breakfast.
What do you say?
What are you having?
You'll eat what you get,
you little...
Uh, Tabitha's out on the patio.
Oh, ha-ha, I didn't
know you had company.
Uh, this is
Mrs. Stephens' Aunt Mary.
Mr. and Mrs. Kravitz.
How do you do?
ABNER:
How do you do?
How do you do?
Uh, where's
Mrs. Stephens?
Or, uh, isn't she back yet?
Uh, back? From where?
Wherever she was going
when I saw her last night.
In that funny costume
with the wings.
Wings? Uh, did
she say "wings"?
Now you know what
I have to go through.
And I saw her fly
right up in the air.
W-was this late at night?
Very late.
Well, then that explains it.
GLADYS:
Explains what?
How come you saw
what you thought you saw.
Uh, things look very deceptive
in the moonlight.
Exactly what I told her.
That's interesting...
because the moon
wasn't out last night.
Sure. It took one look
at you and went back in.
Listen, if Sidney bugs you,
don't hesitate to
get rid of him.
I don't care how
you get rid of him,
just don't send him back to us.
Don't worry about it.
Come on.
[♪]
Sam?
Samantha, this is
getting impossible.
I'd finally gotten used to
being married to a witch,
but I never promised to love,
honor and obey the Good Fairy.
Now, don't you
worry, sweetheart.
I'll have a talk with Mary.
Mary.
Mary?
Mary?
Mary?
Where'd she go?
I don't know. I was busy
with the Kravitzes.
Oh-oh. Y-you
check the patio,
I'll go upstairs.
[♪]
Mary?
Tabs, have you seen the Good...?
Have you seen Mary?
Yes, just a few minutes ago.
She said she was gonna
take a little walk
to warm up her toes.
What?!
She went out the back gate.
Oh, no.
Mary. Mary?
Your father gets excited
a lot, doesn't he?
Only when the Good Fairy
is here.
[♪]
Calm down?
With the Good Fairy wandering
around the neighborhood?
And with those cold toes,
it won't be very long
before she gets a loose tongue,
and we'll be on television
from coast to coast.
Not to mention pole to pole.
Sweetheart, I'm sorry
I can't help you look for her.
You can help by keeping
away from the window.
[♪]
TABITHA: You come in here,
and I'll prove it to you.
Boy, your whole family
is freaked out.
I think I'd better go home.
I think my Aunt Gladys
wants me now.
Uh... Uh... W...
Wait a minute, Sidney.
Uh, what do you think of this
for a Halloween costume?
You're gonna wear it
for Halloween?
Well, I thought I might.
What do you think?
I think you're too old
to go out on Halloween.
Thanks, Sidney.
I needed that.
NARRATOR: Don't miss "Mary, the
Good Fairy, Strikes Again."
Next week on Bewitched.
[♪]
Hi, sweetheart. You're home early.
Hi.
I had to pick this up.
What is it?
It's a Reducealator.
A...? A what-alator?
Reducealator.
It's a prototype for
a brand-new product.
And I've gotta come up
with a mind-blowing ad campaign
by the day after tomorrow.
How's it work?
Well, I'll tell you what.
I'll demonstrate it
for you. Don't go away.
[♪]
Mommy, Mommy!
It's almost out. Look.
Who tied the string onto it?
Sidney. He was gonna pull it,
but I didn't trust him.
You pull it, Mommy.
Oh... Uh...
You've gotta be brave,
Mommy. Come on.
Oh, okay. R-ready?
One, two...
I can't do it.
Maybe you better
close your eyes.
Yeah. Oh...
Oh, okay.
One, two... DARRIN: Okay, Sam.
Ooh!
It's out, Mommy.
It's out.
Look, Daddy.
Hey. How
about that?
How about that?
Can I go over and show Sidney?
Sidney?
Uh, y-you remember.
Mrs. Kravitz's nephew.
He's here visiting again.
Please?
All right, sweetheart,
but come right back.
[♪]
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
How does it look?
Well, I-I'm sorry, sweetheart,
but it does take a bit
of getting used to.
The great thing about it
is it's completely portable.
Women can wear it
while doing the housework.
Oh.
You can...
whittle away
the pounds as you go.
Hey! You want a good
slogan for it?
What?
"Whittle while
you work."
"Whittle while you work?"
I think it's cute.
"Whittle while you work?"
Forget it.
[NARRATOR READING
On-SCREEN TEXT]
[♪]
[♪]
[♪]
Mommy, Mommy.
I'm never gonna play
with Sidney again.
Well, what did he do now?
He says there's no such thing
as the Good Fairy.
He says it's the parents
who put the money
under your pillow.
That isn't true, is it, Daddy?
Well, uh, actually, uh...
Isn't it getting
awfully hot in here?
Not for mothers.
Well, no wonder.
Heh.
I-I left this on high.
I'd better get out
of this contraption.
[♪]
Is Sidney right?
Do mommies put the money
under your pillow?
Come here, sweetheart.
Tabitha, actually,
you're both right.
It's all a matter of believing.
If you really believe
and want the Good Fairy
to come, she will.
Otherwise, mommies
and daddies do her job.
Oh, goody.
That means the Good Fairy
is coming here tonight.
Right. Now,
you run up
and get ready for your bath.
Okay.
[SPANKS LIGHTLY]
Good night, Daddy.
Good night, honey.
Sam.
[SIGHS]
Do you think it's a good idea
to fill her head with
all that nonsense?
What nonsense?
About the Good Fairy.
Well, for your information,
it is not nonsense.
What?
No, I happen to know
the Good Fairy personally.
Her name's Mary.
You mean, she's a witch?
No.
She's a good fairy.
Y-you... You mean, with, uh...?
With wings and a magic wand
and the...?
The whole works?
Of course.
You're not putting me on?
Witch's honor.
A simple "I swear" will do.
I swear.
[♪]
Sam.
Uh, did you just hear something?
Yes. I heard you
wake me up.
[YAWNS] I must have
been dreaming.
[GRUNTS]
As long as I'm up...
I think I'll go downstairs
and get myself a glass of milk.
You want anything?
Yes. I wanna go
back to sleep.
Now, be quiet, and don't
wake up the kids.
[♪]
Ow!
Shh.
[GROANING]
Shh!
[DOOR CLOSES]
Shh.
Sam?
[GRUNTS]
Shh.
Sam.
SAMANTHA:
Now, what is it?
We have... company.
Oh! Oh, Mary.
Oh, Samantha.
Oh, brother.
I knew it was a witch's house,
but I had no idea it was yours.
[GIGGLES]
Oh, uh...
Uh, ours.
Uh, this is my husband, Darrin.
Oh.
How do you do?
How do you...?
Shh.
It's been ages.
Come on downstairs
and sit a while.
I would love to.
You know, the cold
bothers me more and more.
It seems to get into my bones.
How about a nice cup of tea?
I could certainly use
something to warm me up.
I don't know about tea though.
Uh, coffee?
Coffee doesn't agree with me.
How about a drop of brandy?
What's brandy?
It's a very good
warmer-upper.
Ooh! Well then,
that certainly
should agree with me.
Come on.
Are you happy, my dear?
Very.
You don't miss the old life?
SAMANTHA: Well, I-I
don't get a chance to.
The old life keeps
dropping in here
with amazing regularity.
Oh, how nice.
[CHUCKLES]
Here we are.
Thank you.
Mm-hm.
[SIGHING CONTENTEDLY]
What's this called?
Brandy?
Yes. How do you like it?
Very much.
Say when.
I hope you don't mind
my popping in on you
like this, Samantha.
But I really am so tired.
So I thought I would drop in
to a witch's house
and just rest up.
Oh, my goodness
gracious. Ha.
I forgot to say when.
Oh, well.
This has to keep me warm
all night long.
[♪]
[COOING]
Ooh. Ooh, ooh, ooh.
This is nice
and warming. Hah.
Uh... Uh, Mary, why don't you
let me fix you
a little something to eat?
How about a nice chicken
or roast beef sandwich?
I really should be going.
Roast beef?
I-it'll only take
a minute.
[BOTH CHUCKLE NERVOUSLY]
[GIGGLES]
Oh, well, I'll, uh,
just put this back.
Oh, here.
[♪]
You might as well
take the glass too.
It's so good.
[ADAM CRYING]
Oh, that's Adam.
I'll go up, Sam.
Excuse me.
SAMANTHA:
Here we are.
I really should be leaving.
I just dread going out
in that weather.
Although that brandy
really did warm me up.
Sam. Adam won't
go back to sleep
until Mommy kisses him
good night.
Oh, uh, e-excuse me.
[♪]
Uh, Sam.
How long is
she gonna hang around?
Well, I can't ask her to leave.
I can.
You be nice.
Okay. Okay.
Well, feeling
a little warmer now?
Except for my toes.
[LAUGHS]
Although I...
I really don't think
I should have any more
of that brandy.
As they say, if you're
going to fly, heh,
don't drink.
Hm?
It's a mortal joke.
Oh.
I like mortals.
They're... They're
so friendly.
You. You have been
very "hospid-ibidle."
Hospidib...
You're a good host.
It's my pleasure.
[LAUGHING]
Far be it for me
to spoil your pleasure.
Sure. Here.
Hm.
[COOING]
Hey! There
go my toes!
Whee!
Uh, h-how are
we doing?
You know, Samantha,
you are married
to a beautiful person.
A gorgeous, beautiful person.
I only wish I could get
a gorgeous hunk of mortal
like that for myself.
Uh... Uh, Mary, I think
you'd better sit down.
Nope! Just beginning to
feel the tips of my toes.
Watch this.
Stand back.
Stand back.
[♪]
[COOING]
Ooh.
Did you ever see me do
the White Swan?
[COOING]
Whee!
She's crocked.
Darrin!
The Good Fairy
doesn't get crocked.
Hey!
How'd she get so crocked
on just two drinks?
Mary, pull yourself together.
[COOING]
I-it's terribly late,
and you said you had a long
list of children to visit.
No. Not going out
in the cold.
B-but, Mary.
Y-you have to.
You're the Good Fairy.
All those children
are counting on you.
Now, you can't disappoint them.
Why not? What did
they ever do for me?
[GASPS]
She doesn't know
what she's saying.
Here's a list of the children.
Never forget you
for what you're doing.
What do you mean?
Doing what?
Oh. Well...
Well, you... You...
You don't think I'm gonna do it?
If you don't,
kindly tell me who.
[♪]
Well, well. Th...
That does it.
Darrin, I have no choice.
I-I have to substitute
for her.
Why?
Well, we're responsible
for her condition.
She didn't even know
what brandy was.
Someone's gotta make her rounds.
Mary. Uh, Mary,
wake up.
No.
Mary, please.
Uh, just so we can
make the switch.
Okay.
[♪]
Beautiful.
Samantha, you look
absolutely, eh...
Well? How do
I look?
If anyone had ever told me
that someday I'd be married
to the Good Fairy,
I'd have punched them
right in the mouth.
[GIGGLES]
H-how about a little kiss
on the cheek instead?
[LAUGHS]
[♪]
Well, I guess I'd better give
these wings a trial run.
Why do you need the wings?
Uh, can't you just?
The Good Fairy is not a witch.
And for the time being,
I happen to be the Good Fairy.
She doesn't have
the powers to fly.
That's why they gave her wings.
Who gave her wings?
Whoever gives out the wings.
Sorry I asked.
So... as long as I have
these wings on me,
witchery is out.
Yeah?
It's almost worth it.
[♪]
Tsk.
Abner? Abner!
Oh, what is it?
There's a mosquito
in Sidney's room.
Well, as long as
it doesn't bite Sidney,
it's got nothing to worry about.
[CRICKETS CHIRPING]
Abner.
Abner, wake up.
Oh, what is it now?
Oh! You should
see this!
I-it... It's
Mrs. Stephens.
She's got this, uh, flimsy
little thing on, like...
Like a ballet dancer.
A-and she's got these fake wings
in the back, and...
Abner! They're not
fake wings!
She's flying!
Gladys, if you wake
me up once more,
you'll be flying too.
[♪]
[♪]
Oh, Samantha.
Oh.
H-how did you do?
Oh, fine.
Except I am exhausted.
Well, now you have some idea
of what I go through.
Did you have
any trouble sleeping?
It's the first
good night's sleep
I've had in centuries.
Do you have any idea
what a relief it is
not to sleep on your wings?
Yeah, I can imagine.
[♪]
[GRUNTS]
[MOANING]
Oh, what a luxury.
Huh.
Can't do this with wings either.
Mary, I have to get my family up
and start the day,
so come on, let's change back.
Well, c...
Hurry up, Mary.
I have a lot to do.
[♪]
Um...
Samantha...
I've been collecting teeth
and giving out coins
for centuries.
I'm sick of it.
If I never see
another kid's tooth
for the rest of my life,
I'll be delighted.
Uh... Well, what
are you saying?
Don't you think I'm entitled
to a little vacation?
Well, sure, but I'm...
Well, I'm taking one.
At least for a while.
And in the meantime, you're it.
But, well, you...
You can't do this.
I-I have responsibilities.
I-I have a husband and children.
Sure. And now that I've
unloaded this dumb job,
maybe I'll get a crack at
some of the goodies too.
[IRRITATED]
You have no right to do this.
Maybe your husband has a friend?
Mary!
[♪]
Sam?
What?
What? What?
What's all the trouble?
Trouble?
Mm-hm. Oh, no. No... No trouble.
Well, look, Sam, I'd like...
[MOANS]
What is she doing?
Scratching her back.
[SIGHS]
Uh... Uh, look, Sam,
I'd like to get to the office
a little early this morning, so
uh, would you mind, uh,
getting out of that rig
and making some breakfast?
Oh, well, I-if
you're in a hurry,
I won't take the time to change.
Uh, look, Sam...
if it's all the same to you,
I'd rather you shed
those wings right now.
Now?
Y-you mean this minute?
Mommy, Mommy.
Mommy, when did you
get to be the Good Fairy?
Very recently.
Wow. Wait till
I tell Sidney.
Tab... Tabitha,
for the time being,
I think we ought to keep this
a family secret.
Gee whiz. Everything good
that happens here is a secret.
Oh, well, I'm sorry about that.
You run out on the patio and
play. I'll get you breakfast.
Okay.
[♪]
Okay, Sam.
What is it you're
trying not to tell me?
Maybe you'd rather
hear it after breakfast.
Uh, if it's bad news, it'll
sit better on an empty stomach.
Well, um...
Mary is being very obstinate.
She doesn't wanna be
the Good Fairy anymore.
B-but you're a witch.
Uh, slap a spell on her.
Boil up a potion.
Fire a two-broom salute.
Darrin, there is nothing
I can do about it.
Sam, this is the most
ridiculous thing
that's ever happened to us.
It's preposterous.
Why are you so uptight?
I'm the one that's stuck
with these dumb wings.
Furthermore, you are
just as much to blame as I am.
Well, Sam, I'm sorry.
I-I didn't mean to
yell at you.
But you've got to admit
that this...
Don't do that!
I... I beg
your pardon?
Those wings are very delicate.
You've got to be gentle
with them.
Suppose a man wants to hug you?
What do you do?
Nothing. Now you know why
they call me the Good Fairy.
Terrific.
Sam, what are we going to do?
You can't hide out forever.
Suppose somebody
sees those wings.
Well... you've always said
that I'm an angel.
Now I'll look the part.
That's something I've always
admired in you, Sam:
The way you can smile
in the face of...
disaster.
[CLEARS THROAT]
[COOS]
A little chill in the air
this morning, isn't there?
[♪]
[DOORBELL RINGS]
It's the Kravitzes.
And Sidney.
Sam, quick, you better duck.
And take the Good Fairy
with you.
Come on, Mary.
Come on.
No. I'm not the Good Fairy
anymore.
I'm staying right here
to meet the people.
Oh!
Tell them she's my aunt,
and get rid of them
as fast as you can.
[♪]
Hi.
Hi, Mr. Stephens.
Can Sidney play with Tabitha?
Sure. Uh, she hasn't
had breakfast yet, but...
Oh, that's wonderful.
Sidney, you just got
an invitation to breakfast.
What do you say?
What are you having?
You'll eat what you get,
you little...
Uh, Tabitha's out on the patio.
Oh, ha-ha, I didn't
know you had company.
Uh, this is
Mrs. Stephens' Aunt Mary.
Mr. and Mrs. Kravitz.
How do you do?
ABNER:
How do you do?
How do you do?
Uh, where's
Mrs. Stephens?
Or, uh, isn't she back yet?
Uh, back? From where?
Wherever she was going
when I saw her last night.
In that funny costume
with the wings.
Wings? Uh, did
she say "wings"?
Now you know what
I have to go through.
And I saw her fly
right up in the air.
W-was this late at night?
Very late.
Well, then that explains it.
GLADYS:
Explains what?
How come you saw
what you thought you saw.
Uh, things look very deceptive
in the moonlight.
Exactly what I told her.
That's interesting...
because the moon
wasn't out last night.
Sure. It took one look
at you and went back in.
Listen, if Sidney bugs you,
don't hesitate to
get rid of him.
I don't care how
you get rid of him,
just don't send him back to us.
Don't worry about it.
Come on.
[♪]
Sam?
Samantha, this is
getting impossible.
I'd finally gotten used to
being married to a witch,
but I never promised to love,
honor and obey the Good Fairy.
Now, don't you
worry, sweetheart.
I'll have a talk with Mary.
Mary.
Mary?
Mary?
Mary?
Where'd she go?
I don't know. I was busy
with the Kravitzes.
Oh-oh. Y-you
check the patio,
I'll go upstairs.
[♪]
Mary?
Tabs, have you seen the Good...?
Have you seen Mary?
Yes, just a few minutes ago.
She said she was gonna
take a little walk
to warm up her toes.
What?!
She went out the back gate.
Oh, no.
Mary. Mary?
Your father gets excited
a lot, doesn't he?
Only when the Good Fairy
is here.
[♪]
Calm down?
With the Good Fairy wandering
around the neighborhood?
And with those cold toes,
it won't be very long
before she gets a loose tongue,
and we'll be on television
from coast to coast.
Not to mention pole to pole.
Sweetheart, I'm sorry
I can't help you look for her.
You can help by keeping
away from the window.
[♪]
TABITHA: You come in here,
and I'll prove it to you.
Boy, your whole family
is freaked out.
I think I'd better go home.
I think my Aunt Gladys
wants me now.
Uh... Uh... W...
Wait a minute, Sidney.
Uh, what do you think of this
for a Halloween costume?
You're gonna wear it
for Halloween?
Well, I thought I might.
What do you think?
I think you're too old
to go out on Halloween.
Thanks, Sidney.
I needed that.
NARRATOR: Don't miss "Mary, the
Good Fairy, Strikes Again."
Next week on Bewitched.
[♪]