Bewitched (1964–1972): Season 5, Episode 12 - Weep No More My Willow - full transcript
Mrs. Kravitz has circulated a petition demanding that the Stephenses chop down the sickly willow tree in their front yard. Samantha refuses as the tree has sentimental value since it was a gift from Darrin. Samantha has tried almost everything to restore it back to health, including her own witchcraft, to no avail. So she calls in the last resort: Dr. Bombay. His spell seems to be doing the trick. After Dr. Bombay leaves, Samantha believes she got caught in the downfall of the spell. The incantation contained the phrase "weep and weep and weep" which has led to Samantha weeping uncontrollably whenever she is downwind from the tree. News of Samantha's weeping gets back to Darrin, who believes it is solely about her sadness over the tree. However, both Mrs. Kravitz and Larry believe Samantha's weeping is due to the Stephens' marriage being in trouble since they both saw Darrin with their overly affectionate new female neighbor. While Mrs. Kravitz and Larry's misunderstanding continues, Samantha tries to conjure up Dr. Bombay to remedy her situation. That may be easier said than done as Dr. Bombay's work on the tree was his first such and therefore purely an experiment.
There you are, sweetheart.
Your favourite:
Scrambled eggs and chicken livers.
That's what I like,
wild shouts of approval.
For Preparing HAND-LETTERED
Advertising DISPLAY HEADINGS
- Tasty?
- Great, honey. Best you ever made.
Don't mind me, sweetheart.
Just keep on reading.
I'd forgotten what you looked like.
I'm sorry, honey.
But I have a very important meeting
on this Stewart presentation...
at noon today, so would you mind
changing it back?
Come in, Mrs. Kravitz.
I have here a little petition
signed by a few neighbours.
- Petition?
- Mrs. Stephens knew...
we filed it with
the commissioner a week ago.
Talk about the population explosion.
"To the Commissioner
of Public Streets and Highways.
We, the undersigned,
do hereby petition...
for the immediate removal
of the willow tree...
that stands on the property...
of Darrin
and Samantha Stephens...
said tree being a menace
to the community."
No one is going
to cut down my tree.
It was my very own
Mother's Day present from Darrin...
the day Tabitha was born.
Honey, I know how you feel.
I tell you what.
I'll chop it down
and make it into a bookcase...
so we'll have it forever.
Just a little joke
to break the tension.
The only reason I came over
was to suggest that...
well, relationship-wise,
with the neighbourhood...
it might be better
if you did it voluntarily.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
They are not going
to cut down my tree.
It can be saved.
Mr. Stephens?
Hi. I'm your new neighbour.
I'm Elaine Hanson.
How do you do?
I'm Darrin Stephens.
Abner?
Darrin Stephens is talking
to a strange woman.
So, what? I'm listening to one.
Would you drive me into the city?
My car is being worked on,
and I can pick it up this morning.
Certainly. Hop right in.
From Tripoli to Timbuktu
I beg, I plead, I beseech of you
A moment longer do not stay
Come to me, come to me
Dr. Bombay
All right, child. Open your eyes,
stick out your tongue.
No, don't. It's rude.
Oh, thank heaven
you're here, Dr. Bombay.
Heaven had nothing to do with it,
you naughty witch.
Do you realise you've zapped me out
of an ostrich race in Australia...
just as I was crossing
the finishing line?
- I apologise.
- Doesn't really matter.
I was coming in last.
Now what's the emergency?
That is.
My mother did not send
her boy to medical school...
to play wet nurse to a willow.
Well, at least
it won't talk back to you.
Please, Dr. Bombay. I tried a tree
surgeon and he couldn't do anything...
and I even tried some
of my own, you know...
and that didn't do any good.
Then I thought of the most brilliant
scientific mind of the age.
- Thank you.
- But he died a year ago...
so I decided to call you.
That's hardly a diplomatic remark.
It was meant to be a challenge.
Then I accept it.
Abner?
Now Mrs. Stephens
is talking to a strange man.
Why can't you get your nose
out of that dumb book?
I want to see how it ends.
It's about the Civil War.
The North won.
Thank you, Gladys.
If I were a woodpecker,
I'd picket your house.
Well, I suggest
the merciful thing to do...
is to burn the tree
in the nearest fireplace.
No. I want it saved.
It was my very own
Mother's Day present.
I can argue with anything
but the illogical sentiment of women.
Let's have a go at it.
I've got to find out
what's going on over there.
I know!
I'll take Mrs. Stephens
some of my brownies.
Why? What did she ever do to you?
Weeping willow, black with blight
I command with all my might
Let your sap run free and right
And with every wayward breeze
Which within your branches leap
You will weep and weep and weep
Water the patient daily...
keep the neighbourhood pets
away from it and pray.
You know, I think
it's looking better already.
Oh, Dr. Bombay.
I don't know how to thank you.
It really is looking better.
Or is it?
I don't know what's
the matter with me.
I must be over...
wrought?
"And with every wayward breeze...
that within your branches leap...
you will weep and weep
and weep."
Oh, good grief! I must have
gotten caught in the fallout.
Dr. Bombay, I think
you've made a terrible mistake.
I brought you some brownies.
I know when I get upset,
they act like tranquilizers.
Well, thank you
very much, Mrs. Kravitz...
but I'm not upset.
Don't be brave. A sick tree
can take a lot out of a person.
By the way, who was...
that gentleman
I saw you talking to outside?
That was no gentleman.
That was my tree doctor.
He's gonna save my willow.
I wish I had known. My petunia
plant is developing a fungus.
What a shame!
Look, Mrs. Stephens, I'm not
the smartest person on the block...
but I can see you're very upset
about something.
Well, actually...
I am upset about my tree.
Look, Mrs. Stephens,
I wasn't born yesterday.
That's not tree crying.
That kind of crying
only comes from a broken heart.
Is there something wrong
between you and Mr. Stephens?
Of course not, Mrs. Kravitz.
Why, Darrin and I
are a divinely happy couple.
Sure you are.
Well, I'll be running along now. Bye!
Thanks for the brownies.
"And with every wayward breeze,
you will weep and weep and weep."
Thank you, Mr. Stephens.
You're a sweetheart.
Ciao.
"Fair and sunny all day...
with gusty winds
up to 25 miles an hour."
You sure know how to hurt a witch.
From Tripoli to Timbuktu
I beg, I plead, I beseech of you
A moment longer do not stay
Come to me, come to me
Dr. Bombay
It's terrific, Darrin.
Stewart will be wild about this stuff.
Thanks, Larry.
- Yes?
- Mr. Stephens?
A Mrs. Kravitz is calling.
Mrs. Kravitz? Put her on.
Yes, Mrs. Kravitz?
I got only one word to say
to you, you beast. Don't do it.
Mrs. Kravitz, what are you
talking about?
I am talking about a certain
beautiful young brunette...
that you've been
carrying on with.
Mrs. Kravitz,
I can't talk to you now...
but everything at our house
is beautiful.
That's why Mrs. Stephens
is crying her poor eyes out, huh?
Mrs. Kravitz,
I'm sure you're exaggerating.
If I'm exaggerating, may I...
Mrs. Kravitz, I can't talk to you now.
I've got to get back to work. Good-bye.
Trouble at home?
Seems that Sam's all upset over
that tree business I told you about.
- Hello.
- Oh, hi, sweetheart. How is everything?
Oh, nothing.
Except maybe I'm getting
a little cold.
See?
Sweetheart, are you crying?
No! No, of course not.
Why would you say that?
You're all upset over
your willow tree, aren't you?
- Yes, that's it.
- It's all right.
I'll get you another tree.
How about a beautiful magnolia?
Sam, I'm coming right home.
Sweetheart, don't do that.
Are you sure
you'll be all right?
Yes.
Yes, I'm feeling much better. Yes.
Well, then, okay...
but I'll see you soon, honey. Bye.
You did something naughty, Darrin.
Larry, knock it off.
She's upset about our willow tree.
Sure. Who is she?
Who is who?
Who is that cute little chick you drove
up to the office with, that who.
That was our neighbour.
I just dropped her off.
You son of a gun.
The quiet ones are always the worst.
Who is she?
Larry, there are some things that are
personal between a husband and wife.
Now let's just drop it.
Okay, it's dropped.
- It's serious, isn't it?
- Larry.
- You know how I know it's serious?
- How?
- You don't want to talk about it.
- Larry.
Darrin, have I ever poked my nose
into your personal business?
- Yes.
- Right. What's a best friend for?
A best friend is a guy who, when
his best friend says, "butt out"...
he butts out.
Okay, until you come
to your senses...
I resign as your best friend.
- Anything else?
- No.
Then I'll see you later,
when Stewart gets here.
No, you won't.
Something came up, so I can't be
with you on the Stewart presentation.
You'll have to handle it yourself.
From Pakistan to Waterloo
I beg, I plead I beseech of you
A moment longer do not stay
Come to me, come to me
Dr. Bombay
From Pasadena, U.S.A.
To old Red China across the bay
A moment longer do not stay
Come to me, come to me
Dr. Bombay
- From Little Rock to Liverpool...
- Nag, nag, nag.
Where have you been, Dr. Bombay?
- Didn't you hear me?
- Of course I heard you.
I was surfing in the finals
at Makaha.
Came in second.
Would have won if I'd used a surfboard.
Well, what's the emergency
this time?
Your crabgrass developing
a case of the croup?
I'm the emergency.
Oh, dear. You must have
got caught in the fallout.
- That's what I thought.
- That's where I heard it.
Well, I never claimed
to be a tree doctor.
Never mind the apologies.
Do something!
Why didn't I listen to father
and become a psychiatrist?
Believe me, you meet
a saner group of people.
Oh, Dr. Bombay?
Don't you think something
a little tiny bit more appropriate?
That strange man is back,
talking to Mrs. Stephens.
I wonder what it would cost to build
an isolation booth in here?
Hark, ye wretched breezes blowing
Cease Samantha's tears
From flowing
Dry her eyes, awake or sleeping
And let laughter
Replace her weeping
- Has rather a nice lilt, don't you think?
- It's swell.
Wait a minute.
There's someone coming to see me...
that shouldn't see you.
Will you go away? But come back.
He disappeared.
Right before my eyes.
I'd give a fortune
to find out how he did it.
- Hi, Sam.
- Hi, Larry.
What brings you
to the neighbourhood?
Curiosity. Concern.
About what?
Now Mrs. Stephens
is talking to Mr. Stephens's boss.
Now Mrs. Stephens is laughing.
Wanna get it off your chest, Sam?
I don't know
what you're talking about.
Sam, I wasn't born yesterday.
I wasn't even born
the day before yesterday.
When it comes to marital problems,
I'm an old hand.
You know, Darrin was very upset
after he talked to you on the phone.
Yeah, well, he was worried because
I was upset about our willow tree.
Yes, that's what he told me, but I didn't
believe him, and now that I hear you...
laughing a little too loud,
I believe him even less.
Oh, you poor kid.
Stop trying to cover up.
I can tell your heart's broken.
Now come inside and let's see
if we can patch it up.
Now they're going into the house
together, and she's still laughing.
Don't you think it's peculiar?
First she's crying,
then she's laughing...
and now she's going into the house
with her husband's boss.
Don't interrupt him, Gladys.
His queen is in danger.
The marriage is in danger, Abner.
- Yes?
- It's Mrs. Kravitz again.
Get me an aspirin and put her on.
Yes, Mrs. Kravitz?
One word. If you want to save
your marriage, get home on the double.
- Yes?
- Mr. Stewart is here for your meeting.
Thank you.
Mr. Stewart.
Here's the presentation, Mr. Stewart.
I hope you like it.
Mr. Stephens.
Larry, I'm going
to tell you once more.
I am laughing
because I am relieved...
that my tree is better.
That tree looks pretty bad to me.
It looked worse yesterday.
Sam, Louise and I love you two.
Now, if there's anything we can...
Is it another woman?
Another man? Sam, stop it.
Sam, you're breaking my heart.
Oh, hi, Darrin.
What's so funny?
What's so funny?
There's nothing funny.
There's nothing funny.
Her laugh's contagious.
I think she's flipped her lid.
What are you doing here?
Trying to patch things up,
you rat.
Get down on your knees
and beg her forgiveness.
Take care, Sam.
Abner, Mr. Stephens's boss
is gone.
I saved a marriage.
Sam, you should have known better
than to send for that quack.
I wouldn't let that
witch doctor mow our lawn.
Well?
From Maine to California
Dr. Bombay, I warn you
I tried to find a little peace
on the ocean floor...
and between your cackling
and a glutinous shark...
You did it to her with one
of your quacky spells. Why?
Dear, boy, I cannot possibly give you
a medical education in five minutes.
In layman's terms,
I made a boo-boo.
How am I going to explain it
to Larry?
Never mind about that.
Make her stop.
It does get on one's nerves.
Spirit wind, blow and billow
Cure that sickly little willow
Then remove the laugh from Sam
And kindly take it on the lam
And speaking of taking
it on the lam...
Wait a minute.
I'm all right,
but what about my tree?
In a matter of moments
you will hardly recognise it.
This is the baby right here.
Forget the saw. The axe will do it.
Don't you lay an axe
on that tree.
Oh. Sorry, lady,
but that's a court order.
This is only from a municipal court.
We'll take it to the Supreme Court.
Lady, the tree is dead.
Not legally.
Not as long as there's an ounce of sap
flowing through its trunk.
Lady, if there's an ounce of sap...
flowing through its trunk,
I'll drink it.
Now stand back, please.
Lady.
Look!
Would you like your sap
on the rocks, or with soda?
Charlie, did you see that?
No, I didn't see anything.
Let's get out of here.
Your favourite:
Scrambled eggs and chicken livers.
That's what I like,
wild shouts of approval.
For Preparing HAND-LETTERED
Advertising DISPLAY HEADINGS
- Tasty?
- Great, honey. Best you ever made.
Don't mind me, sweetheart.
Just keep on reading.
I'd forgotten what you looked like.
I'm sorry, honey.
But I have a very important meeting
on this Stewart presentation...
at noon today, so would you mind
changing it back?
Come in, Mrs. Kravitz.
I have here a little petition
signed by a few neighbours.
- Petition?
- Mrs. Stephens knew...
we filed it with
the commissioner a week ago.
Talk about the population explosion.
"To the Commissioner
of Public Streets and Highways.
We, the undersigned,
do hereby petition...
for the immediate removal
of the willow tree...
that stands on the property...
of Darrin
and Samantha Stephens...
said tree being a menace
to the community."
No one is going
to cut down my tree.
It was my very own
Mother's Day present from Darrin...
the day Tabitha was born.
Honey, I know how you feel.
I tell you what.
I'll chop it down
and make it into a bookcase...
so we'll have it forever.
Just a little joke
to break the tension.
The only reason I came over
was to suggest that...
well, relationship-wise,
with the neighbourhood...
it might be better
if you did it voluntarily.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
They are not going
to cut down my tree.
It can be saved.
Mr. Stephens?
Hi. I'm your new neighbour.
I'm Elaine Hanson.
How do you do?
I'm Darrin Stephens.
Abner?
Darrin Stephens is talking
to a strange woman.
So, what? I'm listening to one.
Would you drive me into the city?
My car is being worked on,
and I can pick it up this morning.
Certainly. Hop right in.
From Tripoli to Timbuktu
I beg, I plead, I beseech of you
A moment longer do not stay
Come to me, come to me
Dr. Bombay
All right, child. Open your eyes,
stick out your tongue.
No, don't. It's rude.
Oh, thank heaven
you're here, Dr. Bombay.
Heaven had nothing to do with it,
you naughty witch.
Do you realise you've zapped me out
of an ostrich race in Australia...
just as I was crossing
the finishing line?
- I apologise.
- Doesn't really matter.
I was coming in last.
Now what's the emergency?
That is.
My mother did not send
her boy to medical school...
to play wet nurse to a willow.
Well, at least
it won't talk back to you.
Please, Dr. Bombay. I tried a tree
surgeon and he couldn't do anything...
and I even tried some
of my own, you know...
and that didn't do any good.
Then I thought of the most brilliant
scientific mind of the age.
- Thank you.
- But he died a year ago...
so I decided to call you.
That's hardly a diplomatic remark.
It was meant to be a challenge.
Then I accept it.
Abner?
Now Mrs. Stephens
is talking to a strange man.
Why can't you get your nose
out of that dumb book?
I want to see how it ends.
It's about the Civil War.
The North won.
Thank you, Gladys.
If I were a woodpecker,
I'd picket your house.
Well, I suggest
the merciful thing to do...
is to burn the tree
in the nearest fireplace.
No. I want it saved.
It was my very own
Mother's Day present.
I can argue with anything
but the illogical sentiment of women.
Let's have a go at it.
I've got to find out
what's going on over there.
I know!
I'll take Mrs. Stephens
some of my brownies.
Why? What did she ever do to you?
Weeping willow, black with blight
I command with all my might
Let your sap run free and right
And with every wayward breeze
Which within your branches leap
You will weep and weep and weep
Water the patient daily...
keep the neighbourhood pets
away from it and pray.
You know, I think
it's looking better already.
Oh, Dr. Bombay.
I don't know how to thank you.
It really is looking better.
Or is it?
I don't know what's
the matter with me.
I must be over...
wrought?
"And with every wayward breeze...
that within your branches leap...
you will weep and weep
and weep."
Oh, good grief! I must have
gotten caught in the fallout.
Dr. Bombay, I think
you've made a terrible mistake.
I brought you some brownies.
I know when I get upset,
they act like tranquilizers.
Well, thank you
very much, Mrs. Kravitz...
but I'm not upset.
Don't be brave. A sick tree
can take a lot out of a person.
By the way, who was...
that gentleman
I saw you talking to outside?
That was no gentleman.
That was my tree doctor.
He's gonna save my willow.
I wish I had known. My petunia
plant is developing a fungus.
What a shame!
Look, Mrs. Stephens, I'm not
the smartest person on the block...
but I can see you're very upset
about something.
Well, actually...
I am upset about my tree.
Look, Mrs. Stephens,
I wasn't born yesterday.
That's not tree crying.
That kind of crying
only comes from a broken heart.
Is there something wrong
between you and Mr. Stephens?
Of course not, Mrs. Kravitz.
Why, Darrin and I
are a divinely happy couple.
Sure you are.
Well, I'll be running along now. Bye!
Thanks for the brownies.
"And with every wayward breeze,
you will weep and weep and weep."
Thank you, Mr. Stephens.
You're a sweetheart.
Ciao.
"Fair and sunny all day...
with gusty winds
up to 25 miles an hour."
You sure know how to hurt a witch.
From Tripoli to Timbuktu
I beg, I plead, I beseech of you
A moment longer do not stay
Come to me, come to me
Dr. Bombay
It's terrific, Darrin.
Stewart will be wild about this stuff.
Thanks, Larry.
- Yes?
- Mr. Stephens?
A Mrs. Kravitz is calling.
Mrs. Kravitz? Put her on.
Yes, Mrs. Kravitz?
I got only one word to say
to you, you beast. Don't do it.
Mrs. Kravitz, what are you
talking about?
I am talking about a certain
beautiful young brunette...
that you've been
carrying on with.
Mrs. Kravitz,
I can't talk to you now...
but everything at our house
is beautiful.
That's why Mrs. Stephens
is crying her poor eyes out, huh?
Mrs. Kravitz,
I'm sure you're exaggerating.
If I'm exaggerating, may I...
Mrs. Kravitz, I can't talk to you now.
I've got to get back to work. Good-bye.
Trouble at home?
Seems that Sam's all upset over
that tree business I told you about.
- Hello.
- Oh, hi, sweetheart. How is everything?
Oh, nothing.
Except maybe I'm getting
a little cold.
See?
Sweetheart, are you crying?
No! No, of course not.
Why would you say that?
You're all upset over
your willow tree, aren't you?
- Yes, that's it.
- It's all right.
I'll get you another tree.
How about a beautiful magnolia?
Sam, I'm coming right home.
Sweetheart, don't do that.
Are you sure
you'll be all right?
Yes.
Yes, I'm feeling much better. Yes.
Well, then, okay...
but I'll see you soon, honey. Bye.
You did something naughty, Darrin.
Larry, knock it off.
She's upset about our willow tree.
Sure. Who is she?
Who is who?
Who is that cute little chick you drove
up to the office with, that who.
That was our neighbour.
I just dropped her off.
You son of a gun.
The quiet ones are always the worst.
Who is she?
Larry, there are some things that are
personal between a husband and wife.
Now let's just drop it.
Okay, it's dropped.
- It's serious, isn't it?
- Larry.
- You know how I know it's serious?
- How?
- You don't want to talk about it.
- Larry.
Darrin, have I ever poked my nose
into your personal business?
- Yes.
- Right. What's a best friend for?
A best friend is a guy who, when
his best friend says, "butt out"...
he butts out.
Okay, until you come
to your senses...
I resign as your best friend.
- Anything else?
- No.
Then I'll see you later,
when Stewart gets here.
No, you won't.
Something came up, so I can't be
with you on the Stewart presentation.
You'll have to handle it yourself.
From Pakistan to Waterloo
I beg, I plead I beseech of you
A moment longer do not stay
Come to me, come to me
Dr. Bombay
From Pasadena, U.S.A.
To old Red China across the bay
A moment longer do not stay
Come to me, come to me
Dr. Bombay
- From Little Rock to Liverpool...
- Nag, nag, nag.
Where have you been, Dr. Bombay?
- Didn't you hear me?
- Of course I heard you.
I was surfing in the finals
at Makaha.
Came in second.
Would have won if I'd used a surfboard.
Well, what's the emergency
this time?
Your crabgrass developing
a case of the croup?
I'm the emergency.
Oh, dear. You must have
got caught in the fallout.
- That's what I thought.
- That's where I heard it.
Well, I never claimed
to be a tree doctor.
Never mind the apologies.
Do something!
Why didn't I listen to father
and become a psychiatrist?
Believe me, you meet
a saner group of people.
Oh, Dr. Bombay?
Don't you think something
a little tiny bit more appropriate?
That strange man is back,
talking to Mrs. Stephens.
I wonder what it would cost to build
an isolation booth in here?
Hark, ye wretched breezes blowing
Cease Samantha's tears
From flowing
Dry her eyes, awake or sleeping
And let laughter
Replace her weeping
- Has rather a nice lilt, don't you think?
- It's swell.
Wait a minute.
There's someone coming to see me...
that shouldn't see you.
Will you go away? But come back.
He disappeared.
Right before my eyes.
I'd give a fortune
to find out how he did it.
- Hi, Sam.
- Hi, Larry.
What brings you
to the neighbourhood?
Curiosity. Concern.
About what?
Now Mrs. Stephens
is talking to Mr. Stephens's boss.
Now Mrs. Stephens is laughing.
Wanna get it off your chest, Sam?
I don't know
what you're talking about.
Sam, I wasn't born yesterday.
I wasn't even born
the day before yesterday.
When it comes to marital problems,
I'm an old hand.
You know, Darrin was very upset
after he talked to you on the phone.
Yeah, well, he was worried because
I was upset about our willow tree.
Yes, that's what he told me, but I didn't
believe him, and now that I hear you...
laughing a little too loud,
I believe him even less.
Oh, you poor kid.
Stop trying to cover up.
I can tell your heart's broken.
Now come inside and let's see
if we can patch it up.
Now they're going into the house
together, and she's still laughing.
Don't you think it's peculiar?
First she's crying,
then she's laughing...
and now she's going into the house
with her husband's boss.
Don't interrupt him, Gladys.
His queen is in danger.
The marriage is in danger, Abner.
- Yes?
- It's Mrs. Kravitz again.
Get me an aspirin and put her on.
Yes, Mrs. Kravitz?
One word. If you want to save
your marriage, get home on the double.
- Yes?
- Mr. Stewart is here for your meeting.
Thank you.
Mr. Stewart.
Here's the presentation, Mr. Stewart.
I hope you like it.
Mr. Stephens.
Larry, I'm going
to tell you once more.
I am laughing
because I am relieved...
that my tree is better.
That tree looks pretty bad to me.
It looked worse yesterday.
Sam, Louise and I love you two.
Now, if there's anything we can...
Is it another woman?
Another man? Sam, stop it.
Sam, you're breaking my heart.
Oh, hi, Darrin.
What's so funny?
What's so funny?
There's nothing funny.
There's nothing funny.
Her laugh's contagious.
I think she's flipped her lid.
What are you doing here?
Trying to patch things up,
you rat.
Get down on your knees
and beg her forgiveness.
Take care, Sam.
Abner, Mr. Stephens's boss
is gone.
I saved a marriage.
Sam, you should have known better
than to send for that quack.
I wouldn't let that
witch doctor mow our lawn.
Well?
From Maine to California
Dr. Bombay, I warn you
I tried to find a little peace
on the ocean floor...
and between your cackling
and a glutinous shark...
You did it to her with one
of your quacky spells. Why?
Dear, boy, I cannot possibly give you
a medical education in five minutes.
In layman's terms,
I made a boo-boo.
How am I going to explain it
to Larry?
Never mind about that.
Make her stop.
It does get on one's nerves.
Spirit wind, blow and billow
Cure that sickly little willow
Then remove the laugh from Sam
And kindly take it on the lam
And speaking of taking
it on the lam...
Wait a minute.
I'm all right,
but what about my tree?
In a matter of moments
you will hardly recognise it.
This is the baby right here.
Forget the saw. The axe will do it.
Don't you lay an axe
on that tree.
Oh. Sorry, lady,
but that's a court order.
This is only from a municipal court.
We'll take it to the Supreme Court.
Lady, the tree is dead.
Not legally.
Not as long as there's an ounce of sap
flowing through its trunk.
Lady, if there's an ounce of sap...
flowing through its trunk,
I'll drink it.
Now stand back, please.
Lady.
Look!
Would you like your sap
on the rocks, or with soda?
Charlie, did you see that?
No, I didn't see anything.
Let's get out of here.