Bewitched (1964–1972): Season 3, Episode 13 - My Friend Ben - full transcript
Samantha is having troubles fixing her lamp. In an effort to help, a visiting Aunt Clara tries to conjure up an electrician to fix the lamp for Samantha. Aunt Clara does achieve her goal, but the electrician she conjures up probably can't help: Benjamin Franklin. Beyond the issues of Aunt Clara having problems remembering the incantation to send him back and Samantha and Darrin trying to hide Franklin from visitors such as Gladys Kravitz and Larry Tate, the latter who believes he's Darrin's campaign idea for Franklin Electronics, Samantha can't help but enjoy the sense of wonderment in Franklin's face when he learns of what his many inventions have resulted in. Against Darrin's advice, Samantha and Aunt Clara want to take him around town so that he can see the state of his inventions first hand. But as Franklin manages to experiment on his own, he gets into trouble in the form of a grand theft charge. Samantha and Darrin have to decide whether to keep Franklin around for his scheduled court date in four weeks time, or send him back regardless. Aunt Clara may have some say in the matter.
Oh, dear.
No. Not fair.
[Clattering]
[Clattering Continues]
Oh, dear.
Aunt Clara! Easy.
I'm sorry, Samantha.
I'm sorry. I thought I was
popping into the kitchen.
Don't worry about a thing.
You only missed by a few feet.
Oh, yes. Oh, it's
distressing. What?
It's distressing. What?
Oh, dear. You know, I
used to pop in on the dime.
Hmm. Oh, but when you get old,
you know, the, uh, equipment...
The navigation equipment...
You know, it's not what
it was. Oh, oh! Yes, well.
Yeah, so I see. Come
on in. Come on in.
You come in and
sit down. [Chuckling]
There you go. Oh, go on, go on.
Do just what you
were doing. [Chuckles]
What are you doing?
Trying to fix this lamp, but I
think I've got it wired wrong.
Oh, dear. Now do be careful.
Electricity is a
very tricky thing,
with all the watts and the
ohms and the... and the...
- [Laughs]
- I'll call an electrician.
Oh, no. Don't
bother, Aunt Clara.
Darrin will look at it
when he gets home.
I'm gonna go take a look
at Tabatha. You just relax.
Wait till you see
how she's grown. Yes.
Yes. No bother.
No bother at all.
Hark ye, hark ye,
ye witches who live in lamps,
ye powers of watts
and "oomphs" and amps,
wizards of AC/DC transmission,
send me... an electrician.
- [Chuckles]
- [Screams]
It worked!
Benjamin Franklin at
your service, madam.
Oh! [Chuckles]
Samantha, the
electrician's arrived.
Uh, here's the
lamp, Mr. Franklin.
Madam, who are you? What
manner of contraption is that?
[Sighs] It's an ordinary
lamp, and we want you to fix it.
Excuse me, madam. Who are you?
Who are you?
Benjamin Franklin,
madam, at your service, but...
Benjamin Franklin?
Aunt Clara, what have you done?
Ladies, I fear you
have the advantage.
You seem to recognize me,
yet I don't know
you or where I am...
or, for that matter,
how I came to be here.
Are you really
Benjamin Franklin?
Madam, although a prudent
man should be miserly...
with those things he
holds to be certain,
I can assure you
that I am indeed he!
Uh, Samantha, you know,
electricians cost $7.50 an hour.
Aunt Clara. Aunt Clara, do
you know what you've done?
You've brought back Benjamin
Franklin... the famous one.
Now, all he did
was experiment with
electricity. He wouldn't
know how to fix a lamp.
He wouldn't know
how to fix a lamp?
Shocking.
Um, uh, Mr. Franklin.
I'm Samantha Stephens,
and this is my Aunt Clara.
Enchanté, Madame.
[Speaking French]
Oh, merci! [Speaking French]
What did he say? Eh,
what did you say, I mean?
Oh, "We're pleased to meet
each other" in French, Aunt Clara.
You see, in Mr. Franklin's time,
people often spoke French...
when they wanted
to be very polite.
In my time, madam?
In my time? How come you...
How come you to say my time as if
it were far-removed from your own?
Forgive me, but I am perplexed.
Well, I don't blame you.
Forgive us.
Um, Mr. Franklin,
this is 20th century America.
But that's impossible.
It's against the laws of nature!
Want to see a calendar?
And yet I confess...
I find myself in
strange surroundings,
the room filled with devices
I've never seen before.
Can it be...
Is it possible that modern
science has advanced so far...
as to be capable of transporting a
man from one century to another?
Well, yes, I suppose
you could put it that way.
That's fantastic...
Absolutely fantastic.
You mentioned the
word electricity earlier.
I'm... I'm curious.
I dealt with some of the
natural phenomena of electricity.
I... I wonder, did
anything come of it?
Electricity, Mr. Franklin.
But that's... that's astounding!
It's astounding!
Oh, it does work. It works!
Oh, there were those in my day who
would have clapped me in the stocks...
for dealing with
witchcraft. [Chuckles]
Oh, d... Oh. Well, I remember...
Aunt Clara, let's get Mr. Franklin
some coffee from the kitchen.
Oh, don't trouble
yourself, ladies.
Although, if you should
happen to have a tankard of ale...
[Chuckles] Why, Mr. Franklin,
somehow I never thought
of you as a drinking man.
Well, drinking doesn't improve
our faculties, it's true, but it helps.
[Giggles]
Come on, Aunt Clara.
Aunt Clara, you
have to get rid of him...
Nicely, of course.
Now, Samantha, he hasn't
fixed the lamp, you know.
Aunt Clara, he isn't
an ordinary electrician.
He's Benjamin Franklin,
and he doesn't belong here.
Well, um, I
suppose you're right.
[Chuckles] Yes,
I've done it again.
Hmm? I've gone and
witched the whole thing up.
Oh, no, no, you haven't at all.
It was just a little
mistake in judgment.
As a matter of fact, I'm rather impressed
that you were able to get him here.
It was a bit of the
old Clara, wasn't it?
[Both Chuckling] Oh, yes, you
can still teach me a thing or two.
And I'm sure you can
get rid of him just as easily.
Well, I don't know.
It's much harder to reverse the
spell, you know. Ah, yes, I know.
Well, Aunt Clara, you just
stay in here and concentrate.
I'll go outside and
entertain Mr. Franklin.
[Mumbles] Concentrate.
Ooh, forgot. One
tankard of ale coming up.
[Darrin] Hi, honey.
[Door Closes]
Hi.
Well, that's a fine way to greet a
husband after a hard day at work.
Well, what's that? Oh...
And who is that?
This is a tankard of ale.
Sam, who is he?
What have you done?
Well...
Saman... Samantha...
Oh, he's still here.
I thought I had it. Oh.
Mr. Stephens, I presume.
I'm proud to make the acquaintance
of such a charming lady's husband...
and an enlightened
gentleman of the 20th century.
I thought I'd sent him back. I
might have known. Samantha!
Uh, darling, dinner will
be ready in about an hour.
Why don't you just relax and have a
nice chatty evening with Benjamin Franklin?
Benjamin Franklin?
That's right.
[All Chuckling]
At the risk of your thinking
me a vain and foolish old man,
can you tell me... has
anything happened to the...
To the innovations that
I... I began in Philadelphia?
Well, as you can see, electricity
has caught on pretty well.
- Oh, we showed him that
first thing.
- Yes!
[Franklin] Oh, yes, and I
am delighted, of course.
Although, I'm still very
much in the dark about light.
He hasn't fixed the
lamp yet, you know.
Uh, when I was in Philadelphia,
I began... I began an
experiment of lending books...
which I called
the public library.
- Every city has one.
- [Samantha] New York City
alone has over 50 branches.
Oh, Mr. Franklin, so many of your
inventions have become household words,
well, it's hard to tell you
how important they are.
The public library,
the fire department,
the rocking chair, bifocals.
Uh, M-M-M-Mr. Franklin,
uh, did you start
the fire engine?
I started the fire
department, madam, yes.
- Oh.
- Darrin!
I have a wonderful idea.
Instead of trying to tell all of this to
Mr. Franklin, why don't we show him?
Tomorrow, Aunt Clara and I
can take him on a tour of the town.
Well, that's a splendid
idea, madam. Sam, no.
- Oh.
- N-N-Now, Darrin,
I think it would be
much simpler, you know.
Have you two taken
leave of your senses?
In case you've forgotten, Mr. Franklin
did not exactly get here by bus!
But, Darrin, no one has to know how
he got here. He could... [Doorbell Rings]
Stay right where
you are. I'll get that.
Darrin? Larry!
[Larry] Am I too early?
[Darrin] Early? For what?
For anything. I'm
just dropping in.
T-Tonight? Yeah.
How'd you guess?
- Well, Larry, as a matter of fact...
- Still at dinner, huh?
That's all right. I'll just
have a drink while you finish.
Hi, Larry. My, it's
nice to see you.
You two finish dinner. I
know my way to the bar.
Why don't you have a drink
with Larry? I'll clear off the table.
Well, the electricity comes
from outside, you know.
Isn't that so, Samantha?
Oh, uh, Larry, you
know my Aunt Clara.
And this is Aunt Clara's friend,
who's a friend of Aunt Clara's.
Aunt Clara.
Uh, costume party.
- We're going
to a costume party.
- Oh, Tate.
Larry Tate. Costume party, huh?
Oh, wait a minute. Don't
tell me. Let me guess.
Thomas Jefferson.
Uh, no, sir. Mr. Jefferson
was much taller.
My name is Benjamin
Franklin. [Larry] Of course.
I should have gotten it.
Those little square glasses.
Yes, they're called
bifocals. I invented them.
You see, one can look through
the top part or the bottom...
Hold it. You're not going
to any costume party.
- We're not?
- Darrin, you sly dog.
No wonder you didn't
want to let me in the
door. You want to
spring it at the meeting.
What are you talking about?
- Sam, you've got
a sneaky husband.
- Oh?
[Larry] Brilliant,
but sneaky. Oh.
We've been racking our brains
for just the right approach...
to the Franklin
Electronics account.
You know, something socko,
original. And here it is. Franklin himself!
I don't believe I
understand, sir.
You wish me to lend my
name to a commercial venture?
Terrific, terrific.
Just the right quality.
Integrity, honesty.
Let's hear some more.
And this time, sprinkle in a few thees and
thous. You know, for the old-world flavor.
Aunt Clara, why don't you show
Mr. Franklin how the telephone works?
Wonderful gadget, the
telephone. Works by electricity.
Yes. Well, just come this way.
Yes, uh, thank you.
Oh, come on, Darrin. You don't
need to keep up the act with me.
I'm convinced. Just wait till
Bernie Franklin hears about this.
He'll be tickled pink. Larry, I
don't think it's such a hot idea.
It's a question
of... [Door Closes]
Sam, they're going outside!
Uh, Aunt Clara has a cold. She
can't go out without her sweater!
Abner, there's something
funny going on over there!
Something funny "ha-ha," or something
funny "you're seeing things again"?
- [Scoffs]
- Mr. Franklin! Aunt Clara!
Don't you think we
ought to go inside?
It's getting a little
chilly out here.
Mrs. Stephens!
Yoo-hoo, Mrs. Stephens!
Yoo-hoo! Yoo-hoo!
That lady seems to be
hailing you, madam. Yoo-hoo!
Mrs. Stephens.
Uh, Mrs. Stephens,
I wonder whether
I could borrow...
Hello! My name is Kravitz.
Gladys Kravitz. Enchanté,
Madame. My name is...
Uh, Mrs. Kravitz, you
know my Aunt Clara.
They're going to a costume
party. Costume party?
How come she isn't dressed?
Oh, but I am. I'm going as a witch.
Uh, Mrs. Kravitz, what is
it you wanted to borrow?
Well, just a... Mrs.
Kravitz. Good night, Sam.
Clara. Oh, and good night, Ben.
You son of a gun.
Ben! Benjamin Franklin.
I was right. I was right.
Oh, Mrs. Kra...
Funny frog. That's a
funny frog. It's a green frog.
You know what his
name is? Fergis?
Funny frog. Fergis frog. How
can you talk with your hand... Yeah.
Well, for the guy who said,
"Early to bed, early to rise...
makes a man healthy, wealthy and
wise," Mr. Franklin sure can sleep.
[Chuckles] If you just traveled
two centuries, you'd be sleepy too.
Well, you better not let him sleep
too long. You've got a lot to see.
And while you're sightseeing,
keep trying to make Aunt Clara...
remember that spell to
send him back, please!
Don't worry, darling. And
you call me every half hour.
Shall we synchronize
our watches? Mm-mmm.
We are synchronized. Oh!
See you tonight. Bye, darling.
Bye-bye, Daddy. S-S-Samantha.
Bye-bye, Daddy. Samantha.
Oh, he's gone.
Mr. Franklin. He's gone.
Oh, Aunt Clara, you mean you
remembered the spell? Oh, no, no, no.
No, he's gone. He isn't here.
W-W-W-W-W-W-What I
mean to say, he's not here, but...
[Stammering] There.
"Not wishing to be the
source of domestic discord,
[Gasps] "I've decided to
see a bit of the city myself.
With kindest
regards, B. Franklin."
[Aunt Clara] Oh! Oh,
Aunt Clara, that's terrible!
It is. I'll get a babysitter.
Yes. Oh, dear. Come on, Tabatha.
Well, there's the electric
company, the phone company...
and three fire stations,
and still no sign of him.
Oh, dear. Don't you think
you should phone Darrin?
Oh, no. No, no, Aunt Clara.
No sense in him worrying too.
I have an idea. Let's
try the public library.
Come on, mister. Let us in on
the gag. What are you advertising?
I'm merely waiting, sir,
for the library to open.
In those weirdo rags?
Which, by your sundial, sir,
should be in exactly 10 minutes.
Aw, come on, buddy
boy. Stop puttin' us on.
What are you pitchin', huh?
A new movie or somethin'?
Hey, I know. Shampoo. [Laughing]
Aw, leave the old guy alone. Oh, what's
buggin' you, buster? You got a gripe?
Young man, in the
sense that one may learn...
a good deal about a
man by his clothing,
I am, in fact,
advertising myself,
in the same sense that
you, by your appearance,
proclaim what you are.
By your clothes and countenance,
I take you to be advertising...
dirt, slovenliness and a
dislike for soap and water.
Your demeanor proclaims your
insolence and your disrespect.
And by your speech, I suspect
that you are advertising...
rudeness, vulgarity and an
ignorance for the English language.
Good day, sir. Hey, the old
man can take care of himself.
I'm from the Morning Gazette. I
wonder if I could ask you a few questions.
Hello, Mr. Franklin. My, I
certainly am glad we found you.
You needn't have bothered,
Mrs. Stephens. Oh, no bother at all.
But I do think we should be running
along. We've got lots of things to see.
Franklin, huh?
- How long
has he been like this?
- Oh, about 200 years.
Give or take a few. Come along.
It's marvelous,
simply marvelous.
What a contraption! I should
imagine it's very efficient too.
Oh, well, this one must
be at least 35 years old.
The ones they
use now are inside.
Would you like to inspect this
one further? Oh, indeed I would!
Good. Well, I'll be right
back. I wanna call Darrin. Yes.
Larry, it's just not
dignified. That's all.
What could be more dignified than
a man playing Benjamin Franklin...
pitching transistor radios?
The Franklin Electronics people
were ecstatic. You told them?
Of course! [Phone Ringing]
Hello.
Oh, hello, Sam. How's it going?
Don't you worry, darling.
Everything is going beautifully.
And Mr. Franklin is
very grateful to all of us.
And this machine operates
on the same principle...
as these other conveyances
I see moving about?
Yes, yes, you
see, it's automatic.
And there's a button
you press to start it.
Oh, yes. This button here?
[Engine Starts] [Gasps]
Oh, dear! Oh, dear!
Well... This is very exciting,
but how does one turn it off?
[Stammering] I-I-If you... What?
Well, um, don't you
think you've seen enough?
Don't forget. Aunt Clara has some
memory work to do this afternoon.
I seem to be moving. Where's the
braking device? Th-Th-The pedal.
Press the pedal!
[Siren Wailing] [Yelling]
Oh, there must be a spell
for this. There must be a spell!
M-Mr. Franklin, come back!
[Car Horns Honking]
Oh, oh! Listen! Oh!
[Giggles] We'll be home in
about an hour. [Horns Honking]
S-S-Samantha! Oh, Samantha!
[Stammering] The fire engine!
Well, what happened, Aunt Clara?
H-H-He... I'm telling you. What?
Oh! Oh, my goodness!
Oh, my goodness.
Sam? Sam?
Oh! Oh!
Aunt Clara... Aunt
Clara, go home.
And, please, try and
remember that spell.
Yes, yes. I-I-I
will. I-I-I will, I will.
[Gasps]
Mr. Franklin? Mr. Franklin,
are you all right?
Right this way, lady.
I, uh... I am unhurt, madam.
Hey, mister, where's the fire?
Oh, um, Officer, I'm
Samantha Stephens.
And I'm sure I can explain
everything. Well, fine.
Why don't you do it
down at the station house?
This gentleman, whoever
he is, is under arrest.
Right this way, sir.
What a story! "Ben
Franklin Steals Fire Engine."
Aunt Clara, now you
remember that spell.
Right? You'll remember
that spell at once.
Right. Oh.
What spell?
What you're
supposed to remember.
Oh, dear. I'm the
dumbest witch of all.
Oh.
This has all the trappings of
some kind of publicity stunt.
The idea that a name
like Benjamin Franklin...
should be involved in
this kind of proceeding.
As to whether the name
Benjamin Franklin is involved or not,
Your Honor, I believe
I'm the best judge of that.
[Scoffs]
The charge is grand theft,
and bail is set at $1,000.
I'll, uh, put up
bail, Your Honor.
Your Honor, could you
tell us when the trial will be?
Oh, in about four weeks.
[Darrin] Four weeks!
Um... Your Honor, due to the
advanced age of the defendant,
couldn't we have the
trial a little sooner?
- How old are you?
- Two hundred and sixty.
Four weeks. You
can pay the clerk.
We... We should have
protested more vigorously.
The Constitution guarantees to
every citizen the right to a speedy trial.
Oh, don't you worry, Mr. Franklin.
You won't have to stand trial.
Oh, wait a minute, Sam.
We can't send him back now.
If he doesn't appear in court
in four weeks, I'll lose $1,000.
I understand, of course.
Abner, Ben Franklin!
There he is! Come
quick! Come quick!
Although it grieves me to impose
upon your hospitality this way.
We're delighted to have you. As long
as you don't cause any more trouble.
Where is he? Mr. Franklin?
Mr. Franklin! Oh, no!
Ben Franklin?
Where's Ben Franklin?
[Gasps] He... He
was... He was...
[Screams]
Oh, I remembered! I remembered!
Aunt Clara, Aunt Clara,
you've got to bring him back,
or we're out $1,000!
[Stammering] What?
Now she remembers.
No. Not fair.
[Clattering]
[Clattering Continues]
Oh, dear.
Aunt Clara! Easy.
I'm sorry, Samantha.
I'm sorry. I thought I was
popping into the kitchen.
Don't worry about a thing.
You only missed by a few feet.
Oh, yes. Oh, it's
distressing. What?
It's distressing. What?
Oh, dear. You know, I
used to pop in on the dime.
Hmm. Oh, but when you get old,
you know, the, uh, equipment...
The navigation equipment...
You know, it's not what
it was. Oh, oh! Yes, well.
Yeah, so I see. Come
on in. Come on in.
You come in and
sit down. [Chuckling]
There you go. Oh, go on, go on.
Do just what you
were doing. [Chuckles]
What are you doing?
Trying to fix this lamp, but I
think I've got it wired wrong.
Oh, dear. Now do be careful.
Electricity is a
very tricky thing,
with all the watts and the
ohms and the... and the...
- [Laughs]
- I'll call an electrician.
Oh, no. Don't
bother, Aunt Clara.
Darrin will look at it
when he gets home.
I'm gonna go take a look
at Tabatha. You just relax.
Wait till you see
how she's grown. Yes.
Yes. No bother.
No bother at all.
Hark ye, hark ye,
ye witches who live in lamps,
ye powers of watts
and "oomphs" and amps,
wizards of AC/DC transmission,
send me... an electrician.
- [Chuckles]
- [Screams]
It worked!
Benjamin Franklin at
your service, madam.
Oh! [Chuckles]
Samantha, the
electrician's arrived.
Uh, here's the
lamp, Mr. Franklin.
Madam, who are you? What
manner of contraption is that?
[Sighs] It's an ordinary
lamp, and we want you to fix it.
Excuse me, madam. Who are you?
Who are you?
Benjamin Franklin,
madam, at your service, but...
Benjamin Franklin?
Aunt Clara, what have you done?
Ladies, I fear you
have the advantage.
You seem to recognize me,
yet I don't know
you or where I am...
or, for that matter,
how I came to be here.
Are you really
Benjamin Franklin?
Madam, although a prudent
man should be miserly...
with those things he
holds to be certain,
I can assure you
that I am indeed he!
Uh, Samantha, you know,
electricians cost $7.50 an hour.
Aunt Clara. Aunt Clara, do
you know what you've done?
You've brought back Benjamin
Franklin... the famous one.
Now, all he did
was experiment with
electricity. He wouldn't
know how to fix a lamp.
He wouldn't know
how to fix a lamp?
Shocking.
Um, uh, Mr. Franklin.
I'm Samantha Stephens,
and this is my Aunt Clara.
Enchanté, Madame.
[Speaking French]
Oh, merci! [Speaking French]
What did he say? Eh,
what did you say, I mean?
Oh, "We're pleased to meet
each other" in French, Aunt Clara.
You see, in Mr. Franklin's time,
people often spoke French...
when they wanted
to be very polite.
In my time, madam?
In my time? How come you...
How come you to say my time as if
it were far-removed from your own?
Forgive me, but I am perplexed.
Well, I don't blame you.
Forgive us.
Um, Mr. Franklin,
this is 20th century America.
But that's impossible.
It's against the laws of nature!
Want to see a calendar?
And yet I confess...
I find myself in
strange surroundings,
the room filled with devices
I've never seen before.
Can it be...
Is it possible that modern
science has advanced so far...
as to be capable of transporting a
man from one century to another?
Well, yes, I suppose
you could put it that way.
That's fantastic...
Absolutely fantastic.
You mentioned the
word electricity earlier.
I'm... I'm curious.
I dealt with some of the
natural phenomena of electricity.
I... I wonder, did
anything come of it?
Electricity, Mr. Franklin.
But that's... that's astounding!
It's astounding!
Oh, it does work. It works!
Oh, there were those in my day who
would have clapped me in the stocks...
for dealing with
witchcraft. [Chuckles]
Oh, d... Oh. Well, I remember...
Aunt Clara, let's get Mr. Franklin
some coffee from the kitchen.
Oh, don't trouble
yourself, ladies.
Although, if you should
happen to have a tankard of ale...
[Chuckles] Why, Mr. Franklin,
somehow I never thought
of you as a drinking man.
Well, drinking doesn't improve
our faculties, it's true, but it helps.
[Giggles]
Come on, Aunt Clara.
Aunt Clara, you
have to get rid of him...
Nicely, of course.
Now, Samantha, he hasn't
fixed the lamp, you know.
Aunt Clara, he isn't
an ordinary electrician.
He's Benjamin Franklin,
and he doesn't belong here.
Well, um, I
suppose you're right.
[Chuckles] Yes,
I've done it again.
Hmm? I've gone and
witched the whole thing up.
Oh, no, no, you haven't at all.
It was just a little
mistake in judgment.
As a matter of fact, I'm rather impressed
that you were able to get him here.
It was a bit of the
old Clara, wasn't it?
[Both Chuckling] Oh, yes, you
can still teach me a thing or two.
And I'm sure you can
get rid of him just as easily.
Well, I don't know.
It's much harder to reverse the
spell, you know. Ah, yes, I know.
Well, Aunt Clara, you just
stay in here and concentrate.
I'll go outside and
entertain Mr. Franklin.
[Mumbles] Concentrate.
Ooh, forgot. One
tankard of ale coming up.
[Darrin] Hi, honey.
[Door Closes]
Hi.
Well, that's a fine way to greet a
husband after a hard day at work.
Well, what's that? Oh...
And who is that?
This is a tankard of ale.
Sam, who is he?
What have you done?
Well...
Saman... Samantha...
Oh, he's still here.
I thought I had it. Oh.
Mr. Stephens, I presume.
I'm proud to make the acquaintance
of such a charming lady's husband...
and an enlightened
gentleman of the 20th century.
I thought I'd sent him back. I
might have known. Samantha!
Uh, darling, dinner will
be ready in about an hour.
Why don't you just relax and have a
nice chatty evening with Benjamin Franklin?
Benjamin Franklin?
That's right.
[All Chuckling]
At the risk of your thinking
me a vain and foolish old man,
can you tell me... has
anything happened to the...
To the innovations that
I... I began in Philadelphia?
Well, as you can see, electricity
has caught on pretty well.
- Oh, we showed him that
first thing.
- Yes!
[Franklin] Oh, yes, and I
am delighted, of course.
Although, I'm still very
much in the dark about light.
He hasn't fixed the
lamp yet, you know.
Uh, when I was in Philadelphia,
I began... I began an
experiment of lending books...
which I called
the public library.
- Every city has one.
- [Samantha] New York City
alone has over 50 branches.
Oh, Mr. Franklin, so many of your
inventions have become household words,
well, it's hard to tell you
how important they are.
The public library,
the fire department,
the rocking chair, bifocals.
Uh, M-M-M-Mr. Franklin,
uh, did you start
the fire engine?
I started the fire
department, madam, yes.
- Oh.
- Darrin!
I have a wonderful idea.
Instead of trying to tell all of this to
Mr. Franklin, why don't we show him?
Tomorrow, Aunt Clara and I
can take him on a tour of the town.
Well, that's a splendid
idea, madam. Sam, no.
- Oh.
- N-N-Now, Darrin,
I think it would be
much simpler, you know.
Have you two taken
leave of your senses?
In case you've forgotten, Mr. Franklin
did not exactly get here by bus!
But, Darrin, no one has to know how
he got here. He could... [Doorbell Rings]
Stay right where
you are. I'll get that.
Darrin? Larry!
[Larry] Am I too early?
[Darrin] Early? For what?
For anything. I'm
just dropping in.
T-Tonight? Yeah.
How'd you guess?
- Well, Larry, as a matter of fact...
- Still at dinner, huh?
That's all right. I'll just
have a drink while you finish.
Hi, Larry. My, it's
nice to see you.
You two finish dinner. I
know my way to the bar.
Why don't you have a drink
with Larry? I'll clear off the table.
Well, the electricity comes
from outside, you know.
Isn't that so, Samantha?
Oh, uh, Larry, you
know my Aunt Clara.
And this is Aunt Clara's friend,
who's a friend of Aunt Clara's.
Aunt Clara.
Uh, costume party.
- We're going
to a costume party.
- Oh, Tate.
Larry Tate. Costume party, huh?
Oh, wait a minute. Don't
tell me. Let me guess.
Thomas Jefferson.
Uh, no, sir. Mr. Jefferson
was much taller.
My name is Benjamin
Franklin. [Larry] Of course.
I should have gotten it.
Those little square glasses.
Yes, they're called
bifocals. I invented them.
You see, one can look through
the top part or the bottom...
Hold it. You're not going
to any costume party.
- We're not?
- Darrin, you sly dog.
No wonder you didn't
want to let me in the
door. You want to
spring it at the meeting.
What are you talking about?
- Sam, you've got
a sneaky husband.
- Oh?
[Larry] Brilliant,
but sneaky. Oh.
We've been racking our brains
for just the right approach...
to the Franklin
Electronics account.
You know, something socko,
original. And here it is. Franklin himself!
I don't believe I
understand, sir.
You wish me to lend my
name to a commercial venture?
Terrific, terrific.
Just the right quality.
Integrity, honesty.
Let's hear some more.
And this time, sprinkle in a few thees and
thous. You know, for the old-world flavor.
Aunt Clara, why don't you show
Mr. Franklin how the telephone works?
Wonderful gadget, the
telephone. Works by electricity.
Yes. Well, just come this way.
Yes, uh, thank you.
Oh, come on, Darrin. You don't
need to keep up the act with me.
I'm convinced. Just wait till
Bernie Franklin hears about this.
He'll be tickled pink. Larry, I
don't think it's such a hot idea.
It's a question
of... [Door Closes]
Sam, they're going outside!
Uh, Aunt Clara has a cold. She
can't go out without her sweater!
Abner, there's something
funny going on over there!
Something funny "ha-ha," or something
funny "you're seeing things again"?
- [Scoffs]
- Mr. Franklin! Aunt Clara!
Don't you think we
ought to go inside?
It's getting a little
chilly out here.
Mrs. Stephens!
Yoo-hoo, Mrs. Stephens!
Yoo-hoo! Yoo-hoo!
That lady seems to be
hailing you, madam. Yoo-hoo!
Mrs. Stephens.
Uh, Mrs. Stephens,
I wonder whether
I could borrow...
Hello! My name is Kravitz.
Gladys Kravitz. Enchanté,
Madame. My name is...
Uh, Mrs. Kravitz, you
know my Aunt Clara.
They're going to a costume
party. Costume party?
How come she isn't dressed?
Oh, but I am. I'm going as a witch.
Uh, Mrs. Kravitz, what is
it you wanted to borrow?
Well, just a... Mrs.
Kravitz. Good night, Sam.
Clara. Oh, and good night, Ben.
You son of a gun.
Ben! Benjamin Franklin.
I was right. I was right.
Oh, Mrs. Kra...
Funny frog. That's a
funny frog. It's a green frog.
You know what his
name is? Fergis?
Funny frog. Fergis frog. How
can you talk with your hand... Yeah.
Well, for the guy who said,
"Early to bed, early to rise...
makes a man healthy, wealthy and
wise," Mr. Franklin sure can sleep.
[Chuckles] If you just traveled
two centuries, you'd be sleepy too.
Well, you better not let him sleep
too long. You've got a lot to see.
And while you're sightseeing,
keep trying to make Aunt Clara...
remember that spell to
send him back, please!
Don't worry, darling. And
you call me every half hour.
Shall we synchronize
our watches? Mm-mmm.
We are synchronized. Oh!
See you tonight. Bye, darling.
Bye-bye, Daddy. S-S-Samantha.
Bye-bye, Daddy. Samantha.
Oh, he's gone.
Mr. Franklin. He's gone.
Oh, Aunt Clara, you mean you
remembered the spell? Oh, no, no, no.
No, he's gone. He isn't here.
W-W-W-W-W-W-What I
mean to say, he's not here, but...
[Stammering] There.
"Not wishing to be the
source of domestic discord,
[Gasps] "I've decided to
see a bit of the city myself.
With kindest
regards, B. Franklin."
[Aunt Clara] Oh! Oh,
Aunt Clara, that's terrible!
It is. I'll get a babysitter.
Yes. Oh, dear. Come on, Tabatha.
Well, there's the electric
company, the phone company...
and three fire stations,
and still no sign of him.
Oh, dear. Don't you think
you should phone Darrin?
Oh, no. No, no, Aunt Clara.
No sense in him worrying too.
I have an idea. Let's
try the public library.
Come on, mister. Let us in on
the gag. What are you advertising?
I'm merely waiting, sir,
for the library to open.
In those weirdo rags?
Which, by your sundial, sir,
should be in exactly 10 minutes.
Aw, come on, buddy
boy. Stop puttin' us on.
What are you pitchin', huh?
A new movie or somethin'?
Hey, I know. Shampoo. [Laughing]
Aw, leave the old guy alone. Oh, what's
buggin' you, buster? You got a gripe?
Young man, in the
sense that one may learn...
a good deal about a
man by his clothing,
I am, in fact,
advertising myself,
in the same sense that
you, by your appearance,
proclaim what you are.
By your clothes and countenance,
I take you to be advertising...
dirt, slovenliness and a
dislike for soap and water.
Your demeanor proclaims your
insolence and your disrespect.
And by your speech, I suspect
that you are advertising...
rudeness, vulgarity and an
ignorance for the English language.
Good day, sir. Hey, the old
man can take care of himself.
I'm from the Morning Gazette. I
wonder if I could ask you a few questions.
Hello, Mr. Franklin. My, I
certainly am glad we found you.
You needn't have bothered,
Mrs. Stephens. Oh, no bother at all.
But I do think we should be running
along. We've got lots of things to see.
Franklin, huh?
- How long
has he been like this?
- Oh, about 200 years.
Give or take a few. Come along.
It's marvelous,
simply marvelous.
What a contraption! I should
imagine it's very efficient too.
Oh, well, this one must
be at least 35 years old.
The ones they
use now are inside.
Would you like to inspect this
one further? Oh, indeed I would!
Good. Well, I'll be right
back. I wanna call Darrin. Yes.
Larry, it's just not
dignified. That's all.
What could be more dignified than
a man playing Benjamin Franklin...
pitching transistor radios?
The Franklin Electronics people
were ecstatic. You told them?
Of course! [Phone Ringing]
Hello.
Oh, hello, Sam. How's it going?
Don't you worry, darling.
Everything is going beautifully.
And Mr. Franklin is
very grateful to all of us.
And this machine operates
on the same principle...
as these other conveyances
I see moving about?
Yes, yes, you
see, it's automatic.
And there's a button
you press to start it.
Oh, yes. This button here?
[Engine Starts] [Gasps]
Oh, dear! Oh, dear!
Well... This is very exciting,
but how does one turn it off?
[Stammering] I-I-If you... What?
Well, um, don't you
think you've seen enough?
Don't forget. Aunt Clara has some
memory work to do this afternoon.
I seem to be moving. Where's the
braking device? Th-Th-The pedal.
Press the pedal!
[Siren Wailing] [Yelling]
Oh, there must be a spell
for this. There must be a spell!
M-Mr. Franklin, come back!
[Car Horns Honking]
Oh, oh! Listen! Oh!
[Giggles] We'll be home in
about an hour. [Horns Honking]
S-S-Samantha! Oh, Samantha!
[Stammering] The fire engine!
Well, what happened, Aunt Clara?
H-H-He... I'm telling you. What?
Oh! Oh, my goodness!
Oh, my goodness.
Sam? Sam?
Oh! Oh!
Aunt Clara... Aunt
Clara, go home.
And, please, try and
remember that spell.
Yes, yes. I-I-I
will. I-I-I will, I will.
[Gasps]
Mr. Franklin? Mr. Franklin,
are you all right?
Right this way, lady.
I, uh... I am unhurt, madam.
Hey, mister, where's the fire?
Oh, um, Officer, I'm
Samantha Stephens.
And I'm sure I can explain
everything. Well, fine.
Why don't you do it
down at the station house?
This gentleman, whoever
he is, is under arrest.
Right this way, sir.
What a story! "Ben
Franklin Steals Fire Engine."
Aunt Clara, now you
remember that spell.
Right? You'll remember
that spell at once.
Right. Oh.
What spell?
What you're
supposed to remember.
Oh, dear. I'm the
dumbest witch of all.
Oh.
This has all the trappings of
some kind of publicity stunt.
The idea that a name
like Benjamin Franklin...
should be involved in
this kind of proceeding.
As to whether the name
Benjamin Franklin is involved or not,
Your Honor, I believe
I'm the best judge of that.
[Scoffs]
The charge is grand theft,
and bail is set at $1,000.
I'll, uh, put up
bail, Your Honor.
Your Honor, could you
tell us when the trial will be?
Oh, in about four weeks.
[Darrin] Four weeks!
Um... Your Honor, due to the
advanced age of the defendant,
couldn't we have the
trial a little sooner?
- How old are you?
- Two hundred and sixty.
Four weeks. You
can pay the clerk.
We... We should have
protested more vigorously.
The Constitution guarantees to
every citizen the right to a speedy trial.
Oh, don't you worry, Mr. Franklin.
You won't have to stand trial.
Oh, wait a minute, Sam.
We can't send him back now.
If he doesn't appear in court
in four weeks, I'll lose $1,000.
I understand, of course.
Abner, Ben Franklin!
There he is! Come
quick! Come quick!
Although it grieves me to impose
upon your hospitality this way.
We're delighted to have you. As long
as you don't cause any more trouble.
Where is he? Mr. Franklin?
Mr. Franklin! Oh, no!
Ben Franklin?
Where's Ben Franklin?
[Gasps] He... He
was... He was...
[Screams]
Oh, I remembered! I remembered!
Aunt Clara, Aunt Clara,
you've got to bring him back,
or we're out $1,000!
[Stammering] What?
Now she remembers.