Beverly Hills, 90210 (1990–2000): Season 6, Episode 12 - Breast Side Up - full transcript

I still wish you were coming
to New York with me

for the holiday.

Next time.

I've got a whole family
waiting to meet you, you know.

Well, you weren't in any rush
to introduce us last summer.

Yeah, well,

a lot's happened
since last summer.

Mmm...

All right, Keats,
this is your last chance

to blow off your family
and stay here

for a real
Walsh Thanksgiving.



Brandon, you know I can't.

I mean, believe me,
I wish I could,

but I haven't seen my
grandparents in over a year.

Yeah, but you're gonna
miss out on my famous

bourbon sweet potatoes.

Famous, huh?

World-famous.

Hmm. Since when do you cook?

Since tomorrow.

So, tell me something.

How am I supposed
to feel about the fact

that you're spending
Thanksgiving with Brandon?

What are you talking about?

You know what
I'm talking about.



You're worried
about Brandon now

after all this time?

It's not that weird.

I mean, I'm a little
jealous, that's all.

And he gets to be
with you, I don't.

Snap out of it.

- Snap out of it?
- Mm-hmm.

Absolutely, okay?

I've got to ask you something.

What?

Is, um, Kelly gonna be
around this weekend?

Well, I think so.

She's coming over
for Thanksgiving dinner.

Oh.

- Oh?
- It's just that

I wish she weren't,
that's all.

Susan, how many times
do I have to tell you,

you got nothing to worry about.

So then why am I so worried?

I don't know, have I ever
given you reason to worry?

Oh, so, what, now I'm paranoid?

Well...

Mmm.

Feel any better?

Yeah.

I'm really gonna miss you.

Me, too.

I cannot believe we waited
till the last minute to do this.

Everyone waits till
the last minute, don't they?

Let's hope not... otherwise,
we'll be here forever.

Okay, the plan is, we meet at
the checkout in half an hour.

You think we're gonna
be done in 30 minutes?

Absolutely.

It was sweet of you
to invite me along, Valerie.

Of course!
You're David's mother...

I couldn't let you
spend Thanksgiving alone.

Well, don't forget,

it won't be Thanksgiving
without my Jell-O mold.

Yeah, it's in the
shape of a turkey,

with cranberries for eyes.

Hey, don't make fun of my mold.

You loved it
when you were a kid.

Hey, it was always
good for a laugh.

David!

All right, everybody got
their shopping lists?

- Got it.
- Let's do it.

Register three now open,
no waiting.

Attention shoppers, check out
our fresh-baked pumpkin pies,

just in time for the holiday.

We need a clean-up
on aisle seven.

I need a price check

on a 24-ounce bag
of fresh cranberries.

What's that?

A little bourbon
for your bourbon sweet potatoes.

The recipe only calls
for half a cup.

Yeah, but what's the sense
of going to all that trouble

if you're gonna have
a sober souffl?, huh?

He's right.

Sober souffl?.

Clare, everyone's almost
done... will you hurry up?

Okay, help me decide...
what do you think, red or white?

That's easy...
red for the dark meat

and white for the white meat.

No, no, not for tonight...

for my father's cocktail
party, remember?

That's easy... eggheads
like to sip sherry.

They're not eggheads.

They're the senior faculty

for the most prestigious
university in this state.

Oh, boy, I don't know if I can
stand the excitement, Clare.

Fine, then don't come.

It's not like I'm dying
to introduce you

to my father anyway.

Are you ashamed of me?

Yeah.

Kidding.

Besides, you're the one making
a big deal out of this, not me.

What if I brought
my report card?

I'm sure my father's
already seen it.

Oh, Brandon, come
here, come here.

Wouldn't this be nice
on the table?

Some irises, some lilies.

Sure.

That should about
do it, huh?

You know, you have
a knack for that.

- What's that?
- Making things pretty.

Thanks.

It's gonna be a great
Thanksgiving, don't you think?

You're feeling a little
empty, aren't you?

What do you mean, empty?

You know what
I'm talking about.

Behind all the big talk

about this being our first
Thanksgiving on our own,

you miss your family, right?

Yeah.

But you're here.

Yes, I am.

It'll be fun.

You'll see.

Thanks.

We better hurry up...
it's getting late.

I know, and I still have
to go home and change first.

Hi. So, we'll drop all this
stuff off at your place.

And I'm sorry we can't
hang out with you guys today.

Oh, I know.

You sure you don't want us
to come along for moral support?

No, it's just a deposition.

Oh, I forgot
the chopped walnuts.

Oh, I'll get them.
Back in a sec.

He's hiding it well,
but he's pretty upset.

He's got to be... his
entire football career

- could be on the line.
- I know.

Look, you guys, do me a favor.

Promise me that
after the deposition today,

no one will mention Ray Pruit
or the case the entire weekend.

You got it.

Okay. Well, I better
go rescue Joe.

He may know how
to throw a football,

but he knows nothing
about chopped nuts.

I can't believe Ray
is going through with this.

Well, I guess with some
people you never know

what's really going
on inside them.

You don't even know
the half of it.

Yeah, I do.

Valerie told me
about Palm Springs.

Donna didn't want anybody to
know what happened between them,

and now it's all gonna
come out in open court.

Well, we've just got
one problem... convincing Valerie

to let us eat dinner
in front of the television.

- Steve! - Aw, come on, Val,
otherwise what good is it

- not having my mother around?
- You hear that?

I, for one, can't digest my food
without the Dallas Cowboys.

Listen, we are sitting
at the dining room table

and have a proper meal
like civilized people.

- Right, Sheila? - Well, Valerie
does have a point.

A woman after
my very own heart.

Guys, I'm not
with these two, really.

Well, don't set a place for me.

I'm gonna watch the game...
all the games.

That's my girl.

- Traitor.
- Guys,

Nat just called... pies
are ready at the Pit.

- Who wants to pick 'em up?
- I'll go.

- I'll come with you.
- Okay.

Well, what do you
think of those two?

I don't know, should I
be thinking something?

Well, they're good friends.

Yeah.

Who almost got engaged
six months ago.

So, how's life, Brandon?

What kind of question is that?

You see me almost every day.

I know.

Are you still feeling
weird about Dylan?

Yeah, a little.

Maybe he'll send us
a postcard someday.

He will when he's ready.

I have to ask you something.

And... don't take this
the wrong way.

If you don't want
to talk about it,

I'll understand, but...

Was Susan...

did she feel...

uncomfortable about you and me
spending the holiday together?

Um, 'cause... Colin did,

and I just told him that
he was being... paranoid,

and that he didn't have
anything to worry about.

Well, that's exactly
what I told Susan.

- Good.
- Good.

David, can't you see
I'm... busy here?

I'm just trying to
organize everything.

Silver, you don't have

to alphabetize
all the canned goods.

Maybe I can just

- offer a suggestion or two?
- Sure.

Are you planning to cook

breast-side-up or
breast-side-down?

I haven't really
thought about it.

Well, most people roast
breast-side-up,

but that dries the bird out.

If you want the white meat
especially tender,

I recommend breast-side-down.

Well, I'll take that
into consideration.

Uh, Mom, I think we can
handle everything from here.

Oh, I'm sure you can.

I just wanted to help
to get things started.

David, can I see you outside?

I know, I know.
What do you want me to do?

She's just trying
to be helpful.

This is supposed to be
our chance

to make Thanksgiving together.

Friends. No parents.

And now she's taking over.

Why don't you just let her help?

It might make it
a little easier.

I don't want it to be easy,
I want to do it myself.

So, what do you
want me to do?

Just try and keep her
out of my hair, okay?

And stop alphabetizing

- the canned goods.
- Okay.

Look, I just want you to know
I really appreciate this.

It... means a lot to her.

I know.

I'll try and be nice.

Even though you want
to kill her, right?

Sorry to interrupt, but where
do you keep the mixing bowls?

Top shelf.

Thanks.

What?

Okay, you got it.
Hello!

We got pies, we got apple,
we got pumpkin, we got peach.

And Nat says to cook
the turkey breast-side up.

Well, I planned to, but David's
mother says breast-side down.

Can't we just
shove her in the oven?

I'm sorry, do I sense
a little tension here?

You know, I'm trying,
Brandon, but it's not easy.

I mean, she actually made
David go back to the store

because she didn't like the
brand of margarine I bought.

Hmm.

So, where's Sanders?

He and Clare left
for the faculty party.

She was practically
dragging him.

I'll get it.

Hello?

Oh, hey, Colin.

How's the big apple?

Yeah, she's right here.

I'll, um...

I'll take it
in the living room.

Hold on.

Well, it must be nice
for you guys.

- What?
- Well, being able to hang out

again together without
your new significant others

looking over your shoulder.

You know, Val...

you have a dirty mind.

I didn't mean it like that.

Maybe you have the dirty mind.

Oh, I don't think so.

Hi, Bruce.

Hey, how're you two holding up?

Well, I'm a little nervous.

Don't be.

Just answer the questions
truthfully,

we'll get you out of here
before you know it.

Well, I don't understand how Joe
can be in so much trouble

when he was just protecting me.

I mean, is that
against the law?

You let me worry
about the law, okay?

You just tell them what
happened on Halloween night.

And give yes or no answers.

If you can't remember the exact
details about something,

you just say,
"I don't remember."

Okay.

Hey, listen, after
you're done here,

why don't we go
over to Brandon's?

Valerie said they'd
be cooking all night.

I can't, there's something
I have to take care of.

What?

It's a surprise.

But trust me, if it works out,

you're gonna have the happy
birthday after all.

Sounds good to me.

We're ready to go, Mr. Paxton?

Yes, ma'am.

Let's get this thing over with.

Have a seat here, Joe.

Before we begin, would you
state your full name, please.

Donna Marie Martin.

Would you raise your right hand.

Do you swear to tell the truth,
the whole truth

and nothing but the truth,

- so help you God?
- I do.

I just have
a few questions,

Ms. Martin.

On the night of
October 31, 1995,

an argument took place

at your home, correct?

Yes.

And during that argument,

did you see Mr. Bradley
strike Mr. Pruit?

Yes.

How many times?

I don't remember.

More than once?

Yes.

Did Mr. Pruit
strike Mr. Bradley?

No, but you don't understand.

Please, just answer
the questions.

Did Mr. Pruit
strike Mr. Bradley?

No.

The next time you saw Mr. Pruit

was there any evidence of
the altercation you witnessed?

Yes.

And what was that?

Ray's left arm was in a brace.

Thank you, Ms. Martin.

That pretty much covers it.

Donna...

Don't talk to me.

Come on, Mr. Pruit.

Save it for court.

Well, I'm glad to see not
everyone's drinking sherry.

I actually see
a beer bottle or two.

- Clare!
- Dad, hi.

This is, uh, Steve Sanders.

- This is my dad.
- Nice to see you.

I'm hearing a lot about you,
young man.

Oh, really?

Don't believe
everything Clare says.

Actually, not from Clare,

from John Bardwell.

Isn't he your
academic advisor?

Yeah.

One of my very best friends.

He's here tonight.

- Excuse me, sweetheart.
- Good.

I'm outta here.

Steve, wait.

- What's wrong?
- Are you kidding?

Mr. Bardwell's the guy
who found out

I cheated on
my math placement tests.

He probably told
your father everything.

Mr. Sanders.

What a pleasant surprise.

Yes, it is.

- Hello, Clare.
- Hi.

How's the remedial math going?

- Fine.
- Good, good.

What brings you
to this gathering?

Well, actually,
Clare and I are dating.

Oh, that's right.

Arnold mentioned it.

Well, I guess
opposites do attract.

Oh, excuse me,

I see someone
I must say hello to.

Bye.

Did you hear that?

He practically insulted me
right to my face.

He did not.

"Opposites attract"?

What do you think that means?

Why are you so down on yourself?

Why shouldn't I be?

I've been a classic
underachiever

my entire academic life.

You know, I may be a C student,
but I'm no dummy

and I'm sick of these people
thinking that I am.

Who, who's calling
you a dummy here?

All these people.

You called these people
eggheads this morning.

Why all of sudden do you care
what they think of you?

- I don't get it.
- You know what,

I wouldn't expect you
to understand, Clare.

They know you're a genius, okay?

Why don't you go mingle
with the high-brows.

I'll be right here.

Great.

Donna Martin.
I'm a friend of Steve Young's.

He's appearing on NFL Live
tonight.

Sorry, Miss.

Nobody cleared you.

I can't let you in.

Well, could you call upstairs
to Mr. Young's agent?

His name's Leigh Steinberg.

I know.

Look, I just really need
to talk to him.

Well, I'm sorry, but
the taping's over, Miss.

I'm sure Mr. Steinberg
and Mr. Young have already left.

Great.

Oh, my God.

"Sports Agent."

That's gotta be him.

What are you doing?

Mr. Steinberg, stop, please.

- What's the problem?
- Are you Leigh Steinberg?

- Steve Young's agent?
- Yes.

I'm sorry, Mr. Steinberg.

We'll have this under
control in just a moment.

Look, Mr. Steinberg,
you don't know who I am,

but I'm Donna Martin.
John Martin's daughter.

The heart surgeon, he did
your father's bypass?

- Right.
- Look, if I could just have

one minute of your time,
please?

Come on, little lady,
get back in your car.

It's all right.

Talk to me.

What's the problem?

Okay.
Thank you.

Joe Bradley's my boyfriend,
you might've heard of him.

The C.U. quarterback?

Yes, that's him.

Anyway, tomorrow's
Joe's birthday

and nothing would
make him happier

than if Steve Young
could come to the house.

Well, I mean, it's not his
house, it's my friend's house,

'cause that's where we'll be.

You know, just to wish
him happy birthday.

I mean, Steve Young
is Joe's hero.

I mean he would just be so
excited to meet him in person.

Look, Mr. Steinberg,

in the name of love
and football,

could you please help make my
boyfriend's dreams come true,

please?

More.

You know, I take it back.

You never should have come.

You could've sat and eaten
your pistachios at home.

Clare, I've got nothing to say
to these people,

and they have nothing
to say to me.

Stop sitting here like
such a wallflower, Sanders.

You haven't spoken
to a soul all evening.

Let me introduce you
to the faculty.

Oh, great.

Elmo, my dear, you may
have won a Pulitzer,

but the comparison
is to Shakespearean comedy.

Wrong. Helen,
would you trust me?

It's French farce.

Feydeau in his purest form.

Stop bickering, Pickering.

I want to introduce you
to some friends of mine.

This is Clare Arnold,
Steve Sanders.

Elmo Pickering and
this is Helen Kincaid,

esteemed professors
of English literature.

Nice to meet you both.

Actually, I took your course,
Professor Kincaid.

It was, it was great.

Then perhaps you can
help settle this score.

In analyzing the roots

of contemporary American
television comedy,

Professor Pickering
cites Feydeau.

I say Shakespeare.

What do you think?

Sorry, not my field.

Well, you know,
my mom always used to say

that her show reminded her
of the works of Noel Coward.

A comedy of manners.

I don't mean to pry,
but who is your mother?

Samantha Sanders,
maybe you've heard of her?

Of course!

The Hart/ey House.

One of my favorites.

Are you putting me
on, Mr. Bardwell?

No, no, not at all.

Your mother is a comic genius.

You don't happen to have
any old scripts lying around?

Sure, every one of 'em.
Bound.

They're in my mom's library.

Well, do you think...

No, I couldn't ask.

Do you want to look
at one of them?

They're just collecting dust.

- I'd be honored.
- You know, I...

I hate to blow my own horn,

but I contributed a lot of
story ideas to that show.

You know, to give
it youth appeal.

Steve, you were, like,
ten years old.

Shut up.

Steve, what I would really love,

is if you'd come
to one of my seminars

as a guest speaker.

You know, sort of
an insider's view.

Well, yeah, I'm an insider.

I'd love to.

Well, how're we doing?

Great, Dad.

The party is far less dull
this year, Arnold.

Thanks to Mr. Sanders.

Oh, please.

Really?

Well, if you don't mind,

I'd like to steal you
away for a few minutes.

There's a grad student
from Stanford

I'd love to attract
to your program.

Oh, okay.

Nice to meet you, Steve.

The pleasure was all mine.

Hey, don't forget,
call my office.

I certainly will.

You know, Steve,

I don't think you need to worry
about your math grades too much.

You're going to do fine.

Oh, yeah, you think so?

You have a way with people.

In other words,
you're a good B.S.'er.

Mr. Bardwell.

And sometimes that's more
important than anything else.

I'm proud to be your advisor.

If you need anything,
you come see me.

Thanks, thanks a lot.

What was that for?

My favorite egghead.

Let's go find another Laureate.

Hey. How did it go
at the lawyer's?

Terrible.

I think I just
made things worse.

I do not want

to talk about the case anymore.

I think I just
may have saved Joe's birthday.

- What did you do?
- Well, Steve Young

may actually show up
at Brandon's tomorrow afternoon.

Wow! But what if he doesn't?
Do you have a Plan B?

Yup. And it's going to be part
of Joe's birthday present

even if I get Steve Young.

What is it?

Well, I've decided
to sleep with Joe.

- Donna.
- What?

I'm almost 21 years old.

What am I waiting for?

Especially since now I know

my mom didn't give
it a second thought.

Yeah, but this is
your life, not your mom's.

Don't do anything
you're going to regret.

Not doing it is what I regret.

Joe's a great guy.

I don't want to lose him.

Just make sure
you don't lose everything

you've always believed in.

Brandon!

Brandon!

What?

- It's 9:00.!
- So?

So why didn't you wake me?

Why don't you relax?!

How can I relax?

The turkey will
never be done in time!

Sheila?

Morning, honey.

Come over here.

Looks good, doesn't it?

Breast-side down.

Yeah. Yeah, I see.

You don't mind, do you?

I came over at 7:00
this morning,

and Brandon let me in.

You were still sound asleep.

And, after all your hard work,

I didn't have
the heart to wake you,

so I thought I'd better
get the turkey started.

- Oh.
- And I made the stuffing,

I've shelled the peas,
and the Jell-O mold

is setting as we speak.

So is there anything left
for me to do?

Uh... You can get dressed.

Yeah. Yeah, okay.

Oh. What time are we eating
this feast of yours?

I figure the bird
will be done just in time

for the kickoff
of the Dallas game.

You know, I thought

I could pull this whole thing
off myself.

I was a complete failure.

No, you weren't.

I just came along
and organized things.

No. You came over
and saved the day.

Valerie, maybe
cooking's not your thing,

but, in case
you haven't noticed,

you make my son very happy.

You think so?

I know so.

Morning.

Listen, Kel, I thought about

what we talked about yesterday.

- And?
- And...

are condoms really safe?

Not as safe as not doing it.

What? So it's all right
for you, but not for me?

No. How well
do you really know Joe?

Do you know that he's not
sleeping with someone else?

That's mean.

No. I'm just saying

that you barely know him.

You should give it a little time

before you jump
in the sack with him.

Oh...! Morning.

Oh, good. She's up.

Why don't you ask
Clare for advice?

She's just a wealth
of information.

- What?
- Safe sex,

birth control. You know.
The major questions of the '90s.

Isn't it a little early
in the morning for this?

- Definitely.
- You know what?

Forget it. Forget I brought
the whole thing up.

You know what?

How was your father's
cocktail party last night? Hmm?

Good. Steve was a hit.

My father fell in love with him,

and I think I did, too.

Is that possible?

Sure.

Here we go.

Mmm! Gobble, gobble, gobble!

Val, that looks incredible.

Well, I didn't do a thing.

We owe it all to your mother.

Except for Brandon's
famous sweet potatoes.

Which none of you

are having without me
seeing some I.D. first,

so cough 'em up, kids.

Listen, guys, I just want
to apologize for yesterday.

You guys can eat

turkey in the living room,

and watch football all day long.

- That's my girl!
- Cowboys!

Hold on, big guy.

Aren't you forgetting
about something?

Yeah. Beer's in the fridge.

No. I've got a beer.
It's Thanksgiving.

Shouldn't someone say grace?

All righty, then.

I'll say it.

Rub-a-dub-dub,
thanks for the grub.

Yay, God!

- Dig in.
- Steve. Steve,

I don't think that's exactly
what Joe had in mind.

Joe, you want to give it a shot?

Thanks.

Thank you, God, for
your bountiful blessings,

and for our warm beds at night,

for the secure roof
over our heads,

for our loving friends,
and to our nurturing families.

Whatever the path
you've chosen for us,

help us to be
sure-footed upon it. Amen.

- Amen.
- Amen. - Amen.

That was beautiful.

Thanks. My dad used
to say that before every meal.

Oh, we forgot something.

Happy birthday.

Happy birthday!

Thank you very much.

Okay, let's eat.

Oh, guys, don't forget,

Nat's expecting us all

over at the Peach Pit
for the homeless thing.

If I'm doing dishes over there,
I'm not doing dishes over here.

You didn't tell me about this.

What?

About feeding the homeless.

Well, we do it every year.

It's kind of a tradition.

Oh. I see.

Ma, you don't have to go

if it's going to
make you uncomfortable.

No. I want to.

If it wasn't for you,
I'd still be one of them.

Yeah. Well, you've come
a long way since then.

I know.

And I'm eternally grateful.

What time is Steve Young
supposed to show up?

His, uh... his agent
said about 1:00.

It's almost 2:00.

Yeah. I know.

Oh. I'll get it.

Where are those potatoes,
Brandon?

Hello. Happy Thanksgiving.

Oh, hi, Susan.

Yeah, he's right here.
Hold on.

Kelly, you've got to try
some of my sweet potatoes.

Oh, I'm getting drunk
just smelling them.

Uh... Brandon?

- Yeah?
- It's Susan.

Uh... Tell her I'll
take it upstairs.

He'll be right there.

I'm going to put you on hold,
okay?

You okay?

Why wouldn't I be?

I was just trying to be nice.

Do me a favor.

Don't try so hard.

On replay, you can see

why Emmett Smith
picked up that first down.

He's got Moose Johnson
and Big Nate Newton clearing...

Oh, the game is on!

What is it about turkey
that makes you so tired?

Technically,
it's the tryptophan.

It's a natural relaxer.

I'm going to
overload on it, then.

Listen, I hate to
not eat and run but,

if I ever expect to get back
into that starting lineup,

I better make an appearance
at the team dinner tonight.

No. Can't you wait
another half hour?

I'll come back.
Promise.

It'll be too late.

Too late for what?

What's going on?

Nothing. Just some lame idea

I had for your birthday
that didn't work out.

Don't worry. It's the
thought that counts.

I can tell by your face

that it must have
been a great thought.

Come on.

It's just that
I'm a Christmas baby,

so I know how lousy it can be

to have your birthday
on a holiday.

I just thought you
deserved something special.

I've already got
something special.

I've got you.

Excuse me. Anyone here

- named Joe Bradley?
- That's me.

Joe, heads up. This is for you.

Oh, my God!

Steve Young!

Last time I checked.

Happy birthday, Joe.

How did you know
it was my birthday?

Some crazy woman

named Donna Martin jumped
in front of my agent's car,

and here I am.

How did you do this?

Oh, it's a long story.

You know, Joe, quarterbacks
have to stick together.

Oh! You guys, get out here!

Steve Young's here!

Oh, man!

Nice catch.

Oh, this is what I call
a great pickup game.

It's the fourth quarter,
last play of the game.

Young's on the 20.
Let's get ready to rumble!

Hut, hut!

Touchdown!

Perfect.

I can't believe you caught that!

Wish I could thread
the needle like that.

Aw, Joe, keep working
on it. You'll get it.

Steve, I can't
thank you enough.

You've made this
such a special day.

It was my pleasure to come.

Here.

Whoa! Nice ring.

Yeah, I got that
out of a cereal box.

What do you think?

Listen, Steve, take 'em
all the way this year, huh?

Yeah, hopefully.

That's the idea. Keep it going.

Hey, thanks.
It's been a lot of fun.

I've got to get back
to the airport,

but it was nice meeting you all.

- Thanks a lot.
- You're the king.

Hey, Joe, can
I see you for a second?

Sure.

Hey, I heard about you
getting benched last week,

and I read about your legal
trouble that you've been in.

Yeah, I might get
axed from the team.

Listen, you're a good kid,
and you should never give up,

but, you know,
guys like you and I,

we eat, drink
and sleep football

and, sooner or later,
it comes to an end,

and you never know
when that's going to be,

so take this
opportunity maybe

to figure out what you're going
to do for the rest of your life.

- Thanks.
- Yeah. You bet.

Hey, it's been fun.

- Happy birthday.
- Thanks a lot.

Hey, we'll see you
in the Hall of Fame.

You are amazing.

You know that?

Yeah, I know.

You know, I wish I could say
that after all these years

of doing this, that there were
fewer people that need it,

but we had a bigger turnout
this Thanksgiving than ever.

You're a good man, Nat.

- Hey, I'll take this.
- Thanks.

I am so stuffed.

I don't want to see another
turkey until Christmas.

Hi, guys.

Listen, I've made up my mind.

I'm going to go
through with it. Tonight.

Donna, that's a big decision,

but if you're really sure,
I'm happy for you.

I am sure.

I mean, Joe is such a wonderful
guy, don't you think?

Yeah. I got to know him
a lot better today.

And I changed my mind.

I think he's a good guy.

Thanks.

I'm kind of nervous though.

Everybody is.

But it's gonna be a
wonderful thing, you'll see.

Especially between two
people like you and Joe.

Yeah.

Hey, Kel.

Looks like the party's

almost over.
What're you gonna do?

Oh, I don't really feel
like going home.

Well, where do you want to go?

I don't know, we could
go someplace quiet and hang out.

Well, it just so happens I have
the house to myself tonight.

There's a horror marathon on TV.
What do you say?

Perfect.

I'll follow you.

Thanks for everything today.

I know my mom drove you nuts,
but you really made her day.

Well, if it wasn't for her,

we would have been
eating Chinese food.

Turn off the light.

What, are you actually planning
on staying here tonight?

It's okay, isn't it?

What, are you kidding?

Well, good, because I'm too
exhausted to drive home.

I thought you said
my bed was lumpy.

Well, it is,
but I'll manage.

Besides, I think Brandon

wants to have the house
to himself tonight.

Why?

Well, I think he wants
to spend some time alone.

You know, these
past couple days

we've had a house full
of people.

Or, maybe he doesn't plan on
spending the night alone.

What?

Oh, come on, Brandon and Kelly

have been circling each other

since Colin and Susan
left for New York.

Well, I haven't noticed.

I've been too busy worrying
about turkey and trimmings.

Do you think everybody
had fun today?

What, are you kidding, this was
the best Thanksgiving yet.

Good.

'Cause you guys
are my family now,

and I wanted my family
to have a good holiday.

Well, you definitely
pulled it off.

Thanks.

You know, one more thing,

and this will be the perfect
Thanksgiving.

What would that be?

Make love to me?

There's nothing else
I'd rather do.

I cannot believe
you're eating more turkey

after what we finished today.

It's a Walsh tradition.

Turkey sandwiches at 11:00
on Thanksgiving night.

And turkey soup for a week.

Whatever.

Hey, bring it into
the living room.

Let's watch that movie.

Kel, um...

whatever happened between us?

That's a hard question.

I guess we should just chalk
it up to bad timing, huh?

Beyond that, it just
gets too complicated.

It was more than that.

I knew that if I made a choice
between you and Dylan,

it would've ruined
your friendship.

So you did the honorable thing.

Yep, but now Dylan's gone.

I noticed.

And I... have Colin.

And I have Susan.

And they have feelings, too.

So, I guess that means

that we're both going to do
the honorable thing, huh?

Would you have it any other way?

No.

Come on.

The Bride of
Frankenstein awaits.

You know, if we stay up
late watching a movie,

I'm not going to feel
much like driving home.

So can I crash here?

That's going to make it
a little more difficult

to do the honorable thing.

I'll sleep in Steve's room.

You better lock the door.

I'll take that as a compliment.

You should.

I've had the most
amazing few days.

I caught a pass
from Steve Young. Hello!

I traded quips with
Nobel prize winners.

Maybe I'm doing
something right.

You do a lot of things right.

- Oh, yeah?
- Mm-hmm.

Maybe it's time I started
demonstrating my finer things.

Wait a second, I want
to give you something.

What? And how many shots will
it take to get rid of it?

Put your hand out.

Okay, now this is something

that's very important
to me, okay?

But I want you to have it.

What is this?

Clare, you're not in a sorority.

It's not for a sorority.

It's my Phi Beta Kappa Key.

Honor society.

I want you to have it.

Well, I feel like that
scarecrow getting a diploma.

Usually I feel like
the flying monkey,

but today I guess I get
a brain, huh?

You have a brain.

And now you have
the key to prove it.

Thanks, Clare.

You earned it.

You really believe in me?

Yeah, I do.

This was definitely the best
birthday I've ever had.

Thank you.

Yeah, well, it's not over yet.

Joe, I want to be
with you tonight.

Wait a minute.

What?

I knew that I liked
you a lot, Donna.

But after today, after all
you've done for me...

I now know that
I'm crazy about you.

Good.

'Cause I'm crazy about you, too.

And that's why
I have to say this,

before we get any closer,
before this goes too far.

What?

What's the matter?

I haven't felt this way about
someone in a... a long time.

Maybe ever.

So why is that a problem?

Because, Donna, I, um...

Look Joe, whatever
it is I'll understand.

All right.

Then, I'll just come
right out with it.

Donna, I don't believe
in premarital sex.

What?

I know that sounds
incredibly square.

And, uh, you know,
if that's too much

for you to handle then,
then I totally understand.

Wait, let me get this straight,
you have no sexual history?

None to speak of.

You're not gonna believe this.

What?

Me either.

Me either, what?

Me either that I don't
have any sexual history.

I don't believe
in premarital sex.

But you just said...

I know, and I meant it.

I guess part of me just thought
that I might lose you

if I didn't sleep with you.

Donna,

that is the most

wonderful thing anyone
has ever said to me.

Hi.

Good morning.

I didn't know you were up.

I've been up for hours.

- I'm going to get the paper.
- Already got it.

And I have coffee.

Well, I hope it's strong.

I have two days
to finish all the work

I've been putting
off all weekend.

So when's Colin getting back?

Sunday.

How about Susan?

Same.

You know, sometimes...

I really hate being
such a good guy.

Well, this shouldn't
be one of those times.

We did the right thing, Brandon.

Yeah, I know.

What was that for?

Nothing.

Just for being you, that's all.

That's nice.