Beverly Hills, 90210 (1990–2000): Season 3, Episode 7 - Song of Myself - full transcript

As the gang of West Beverly begins its senior year, Andrea accuses the new reading teacher and Blaze faculty advisor, Gil Meyers, of sexism when he names Brandon the new editor of the school paper. Meanwhile, David discovers that his summer fling Nikki, is a transfer sophomore student and Donna's new friend. Brenda and Steve become "senior buddies" to two freshmen who are Sue Scanlon, the late Scott's younger sister who has two personalities, and Herbert, an intellectual type. Also, Kelly continues to be uncomfortable and jealous about seeing Dylan with Brenda.

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Am I the only person
that missed this place?

What, Brandon,
are you crazy, man?

We only got 15
minutes of freedom left.

Enjoy yourself.

One day, we'll all look back

and wish that we could start
high school all over again.



Yeah, you speak for yourself.

Look, all I know is that
for the last three years,

I've been working and
studying my butt off.

This year,
something's got to give.

I got to have some fun.

I thought that's what
we've been doing.

Mmm.

How long do you think
those two can really last?

I don't know. I'm not
an astrologer, Donna.

Actually though, some
people do wind up

marrying their high
school sweethearts.

Yeah, I guess so.

Good morning, West Beverly.

This is your
conscience speaking.



Now, the administration
has asked me to inform

all new and transferred
students to report to the main quad

where you'll be teamed
up with your senior buddies.

There, they'll be able to answer

all those burning
questions you may have,

like, where exactly is
the main quad anyway?

Nikki. David.

You told me you were the
school DJ, but what a setup.

So what are you doing here?

I transferred.

This has got to be the coolest
place in the entire school.

Well, I thought you were
going back to San Francisco.

I did.

But things got
really hairy at home,

so I convinced my
folks to let me move

down to La La Land
and live with my aunt.

That's great.

Listen, uh,

I'd love to hang out,

but I've got to go
meet my senior buddy.

Hope it's not as
geeky as it sounds.

We ever look that young?

I can't believe I'm
actually doing this.

Steve, since when did you
get a dose of school spirit?

Oh, I didn't. I just
needed something

to write on my
college application.

Figures.

Besides, I just
might be paired up

with some fine
postpubescent feline.

Hello.

Are you Steve Sanders?

At your service.

Are you my new buddy?

No.

That lost little kid
right over there is.

I'm out of this.

Too late for that.

Steve Sanders.

I found you.

Herbert Little, your
freshman buddy.

Well, let's get
one thing straight.

You're not my
little buddy, Hubert.

Herbert.

Fine.

I'm only doing this because it
looks good on my transcripts.

So if you stay out of my
hair, don't embarrass me,

we'll get along just fine.

Got it, Hubert? Herbert.

Whatever.

Are you Susie?

Uh, yes.

Hi. Brenda Walsh.
I'm your senior buddy.

I'm here to answer
any and every question

you may have about
good old West Beverly.

Uh, great.

Um, where's the bathroom?

Is everything okay
in there, Susie?

Yeah, everything's fine. Thanks.

So, anyway, like I was saying,
when I first transferred here,

my friends thought being a
cheerleader was really uncool.

So I didn't go out
for the pep squad,

even though it was something
that I really wanted to do.

Just remember, the key to
being happy in this school

is to forget about
everybody else

and just be your own person.

So what were you saying
about the pep squad?

There you are.

I was about to give up on you.

Sorry, Chief. I was
gonna call you last night,

but it got a little late.

Likely story.

Come here.

I want to show you
what I did so far.

I set up some assignments.

Oh, wait till you hear this.

We have a new faculty advisor.

What happened to Miss McCormick?

She's seven months pregnant.

I didn't know she was married.

She's not.

Ah. Oh.

So tell me,

should we run a story on it,

or is that a little too
tabloid for The Blaze?

Listen, Andrea, that's
kind of what I came here

to talk to you about.

I just don't think
I'm gonna be able

to get up for working
on the paper this year.

Forget it, Brandon.

That is exactly what
you said last year.

Well, I'm serious, Andrea.

It's been two years;
it's getting tired already.

Yeah, and we're seniors.

This is our chance to
leave our mark. Exactly.

We're seniors. And I don't
want to have to work that hard.

Well, that's too bad.

I need you on staff, and
I'm not letting you quit.

You're not letting me?

No.

What are you gonna do, chain
me to my computer terminal?

Don't stop on my account.

You two were
definitely on a roll.

Are you Mr. Meyers?

This is true.

This is our new faculty advisor

and our AP English teacher.

This is also true.

Hi. I'm Andrea Zuckerman,

editor-in-chief.

And this is Brandon Walsh,

who has the crazy
idea that he's not

gonna be sports
editor this year.

That's because I'm not.

Don't worry. He'll come around.

You see what I
have to put up with?

If you're half as good
as Andrea thinks you are,

I just might have to
help her twist your arm.

Great.

Two against one.

Those are my
favorite kind of odds.

Mine, too.

Hi.

I didn't know you
were in this class.

Yo hablo Español
muy bien, chica.

I don't hablo at all.

Kelly, I tried to
call you last night.

I was home all night.

I hung up when David answered.

Oh, so that was you.

Yeah, he said he
got a heavy breather.

What'd you want?

I just, I thought
we should talk,

you know, before we walked
in here again for another year.

Don't sweat it.

Hi, guys.

Brenda, hi.

This is great.

The three of us are
finally in the same class.

Mr. Meyers. Mr. Meyers.

Hello, Andrea.

Hi. I just wanted to tell you,

I thought your class was
really terrific this morning.

Thanks. I'm trying.

I thought you might
want to take a look

at this preliminary report

that I worked up over
the weekend, you know,

summarizing my ideas how to
streamline the editorial process

so that, you know,
we can... Tell you what.

Why don't you bring that to
the organizational meeting

we're having after school today.

Oh. Okay, that's...
that's a good idea.

See ya.

Uh, just one other thing.

I, uh...

I want you to know
I really appreciate

your trying to help me
keep Brandon on the staff.

He seems like a good guy.

Ah, he's a great guy.

He's a terrific writer
with unlimited potential.

I can't imagine doing
The Blaze without him.

We'll see what we can do.

Just, you know, sometimes,

he can get a little lazy
if he's not pushed, but...

That's okay.

Human beings are
like that sometimes.

See ya.

Good-bye.

I can't wait for you to
meet this girl, David.

She's just the type of person

you can open up to
right away, you know?

I mean, we just have
so much in common.

That's great.

Sounds like you really
made a new friend.

Yeah, I really think I did.

We just clicked, you know?

Oh, there's my student buddy.

I want you to meet her.

Nikki, over here.

Hi.

Hi. Nikki, this is
my boyfriend, David.

David, this is who
I was talking about.

Hi. Uh, David?

Nice to meet you.

It's nice to meet you, too.

Bren, what do you say
we blow this pop stand

and find someplace else to eat?

I can't stand another
year of cafeteria food.

What'd you have in mind?

Well, I don't know.

Um, my place?

Yeah, right. I know how
much food is in your fridge.

Hey, nobody said anything
about having to eat.

I don't think so.

Not the first day
at school anyway.

Just a thought.

Well, hold that thought.

Hey, there's Kel.

Kelly!

Let her go, Bren.

Why?

I just want to have lunch alone.

Oh, that's sweet.

So fill out these cards

and let me know a
little bit about yourself.

And don't be shy because,
well, I'm easily impressed.

Nice to see you, Mr. Walsh.

Yeah, like I had a
choice in the matter.

But, more importantly,
I want to know

what you want to do
on the paper this term

so that you don't keel
over from terminal boredom.

This guy is sharp.

What a great way
to boost morale.

In any event,

I read the first four issues of
last year's paper over lunch,

and, well, found it to be
eminently more digestible

than the mystery meat they
were serving in the cafeteria.

You guys did good work.

I was very impressed.

But I know you can
do better, a lot better.

Now, with regards
to the layout...

Excuse me, Mr. Meyers?

Uh, what specifically
didn't you like about it?

Don't get me wrong.
It was very readable.

I just think the layout could
use a little more graphics,

and the editorial style
could be a little more precise.

Well, what you didn't know is

that 70% of the staff
was new last fall,

so I'm sure when you read
what we did in the spring,

you'll see why the Blaze went
on to win a Quill and Scroll Award.

I'm well aware of your
accomplishments, Andrea.

Ahn-drea.

Andrea.

Clearly, you're
a first-rate editor,

and since this is my first day,

I don't want to
ruffle any feathers.

But that doesn't mean

there's no room for
improvement, does it?

No.

Good.

Now, moving right along,

does anyone have any questions?

Yes?

Are you married?

Andrea, if he didn't like you,

why did he say you were
a first-class editor, huh?

It's just a vibe I'm
getting from him, that's all.

What are you so insecure about?

I don't know.

I just feel like all day

I've been saying the
wrong thing to him.

Well, maybe you
have a crush on him.

What was the name of that
drama teacher you went out with?

Will you get your mind out of
the gutter, please? I'm serious.

I have to find a way to show him

how much passion I
have for the newspaper,

how committed I am.

Will you relax?

Once Meyers finds out what
a great journalist you are,

he'll be kissing the
ground you walk on.

Yeah.

Ready for the burgers, honey?

Forget about the burgers.

I can't even get
the coals started.

What's the matter,
Dad? Lost your touch.

Well, I'm lost
without lighter fluid.

We may be saving
the ozone layer,

but we're going
to die of starvation.

Come on, Jim. I mean,

I'm not a Boy Scout,
but I can start a barbecue.

This is not just any
barbecue, Dylan.

It's a smoke 'n bake.

Oh, that's right.
It's not just a grill.

It's a mira-grill.

Hey, it's tricky, okay?

You're right, Dad.

Come on, papa-san.

Let me show you how you
do this fire-starting thing.

Be my guest.

Well, it's simple aerodynamics.

Oh, I see, I see, I see, I see.

What a difference
a summer makes.

I told you, all Dad needed

was some time to
get used to Dylan.

Yeah. Like, two years.

Brandon, what you're
seeing is male bonding

at its very best.

A fire is involved.

Cindy, you, uh... you
got any newspaper?

Sure, Dylan.

Come here.

Every time I turn around,

I see him hugging
her or kissing her.

I don't know if I'm
going to make it

through a whole year of this.

Kel, can I ask you
something, and I really

don't mean to be getting
too personal or anything?

What?

Are you in love with
Dylan or something?

No!

I just can't stand

being in every class
with him and Brenda.

That's all.

Yeah, well, you're worried
about surviving a year.

I may not last a week.

Why?

Remember Nikki, that girl

who I messed around
with this summer?

Well, she just

transferred to West Beverly,

and guess who her
new senior buddy is?

Uh-oh.

Yeah, when the three
of us are together,

she acts like she's
never met me.

When we're alone, she's
clearly coming on to me.

You're right.

You're probably not going to
make it through a whole week.

So, what do I do?

Come clean. That's
your only choice.

♪ You're the one
who's in control now... ♪

You really think honesty
is the best policy?

Absolutely.

It's better that Donna find
out from you than from Nikki.

Oh, okay, Kel.

You're the expert.

♪ Come out from under there ♪

♪ Show us your beauty... ♪

You're a teacher's
dream, Zuckerman.

Mr. Meyers!

What are you doing
at the public library

on the first night of school?

Well, like you
said in class today,

reading a good book
is like doing aerobics

for the imagination.

Let me ask your
opinion about something.

Brandon Walsh.

Is he motivated?

Without a doubt.

Do you think he's a leader?

Everybody likes him.

I know he's popular.

What I want to
know... Is he a leader?

Could be.

I think he's a little bored
being the sports editor.

To say the least.

You know, I think if
you gave him more,

if you challenged him,

he could really
rise to the occasion.

That's exactly
what I had in mind.

Really? What were you thinking?

I was thinking that he has
a chance to be a real star,

but he needs a
swift kick in the butt.

And since you've done
it for the last two years,

I was thinking we make
him the next editor-in-chief.

And you could be the
woman behind the man.

What do you think?

Yeah.

Well, if you ever
need a ride home,

I've got a 'Vette that...

Excuse me, Steve.

This'll just take a minute.

Make it quick, Hubert.

Herbert.

Oh, uh, where's
the computer lab?

Building C.

Second door on your right.

Just follow the dweeb droppings.

Now, where were we?

Sorry.

No harm, no foul.

♪ There's a time and a
place for your vision... ♪

Can I come in?

Yeah, sure.

Uh...

Listen, David,

I've been thinking about
how I handled things

with Donna yesterday.

I mean, I could have just said

I bumped into you at the
beach club this summer,

but I didn't want to lie to her.

I mean I like you.

And I like Donna.

So I really don't want
things to get... sticky.

Me either.

So, are you going to tell her?

Well, yeah, absolutely...

I just haven't
found the right time.

Well, just don't
wait too long, okay?

You're right.

I'll tell her tonight.

Good.

♪ ...And you better be ready ♪

♪ 'Cause you never
know when it will be ♪

♪ Close your eyes
and your heart... ♪

In the "Song of Myself,"

Whitman wrote, "I am
the poet of the body,

"I am the poet of the soul...

"I am the poet of the
woman the same as the man.

"And I say it is as great to
be a woman as to be a man."

Whitman wrote
that 150 years ago.

Talk about being
on the cutting edge...

We'll get into
more of it tomorrow.

Uh, Brandon, Andrea...

stick around for
a minute, will ya?

Had to get me back
into the newspaper game,

didn't you?

Have any idea
what this is about?

I have a vague idea.

So, are you about ready

to let him in on
our little secret?

Whenever you are.

What?

You two ganging up on me again?

Since no one else volunteered,

Andrea and I have decided

that you are the best
person at this school

to become the next
editor-in-chief of the Blaze.

It's a joke, right?

Nope.

You had something
to do with this?

Congratulations, Chief.

Oh.

I'm really sorry.

We've got to stop
meeting like this.

I think that one's mine.

Oh, here you go.

Thanks.

Mr. Meyers... Mr. Meyers.

Brandon, I've got
to level with you.

Every time someone
calls me Mr. Meyers

I keep looking
around for my father.

So when we're out of class,

why don't you call me Gil...

especially now since
you're the big kahuna.

Actually, that's what I
wanted to talk to you about.

Don't tell me you're
getting cold feet already.

No, no, no, I just, uh,

I need to get something
straight in my own head.

Can we go talk for a minute?

Sure.

So Andrea was okay

with me taking over the paper?

She was your biggest booster.

She's behind you 100%.

Well, to be honest
with you, Gil,

in my humble opinion,

she's the one who
deserves the job.

She's done it for
the last two years.

The poor girl needs a
break, for God's sakes.

Well, granted,
Andrea is intense,

but... it's like the
Blaze is her entire life.

My point exactly.

Listen, I'm really flattered

that you have that
much confidence in me,

but I've always been
more of a team player.

But eventually every
player's got to step up

to the plate, don't they?

Yeah, but it's my senior year.

I, I wanted to just kick
back and cruise, you know?

And what...

"party, radical, dude?"

Is that what we're
talking about?

'Cause if we are,
I can totally relate.

You're talking to the
original couch potato.

The thought of reading

for my own pleasure was
completely foreign to me

till I was a senior
in high school,

and then everything changed.

What happened?

My English teacher
gave me a book of poems

by Walt Whitman.

"It's only life...

with its immense
passion, pulse, and power."

You really think
I'm up for this?

Go for it, Brandon.

You want me to give a barbecue?

Dylan, you have that big house

and you never use it.

I don't know.

Hi, Brenda.

Hi, Sue.

Bren, you know that girl?

Yeah, that's my freshman buddy.

Mmm, what reform school
did she escape from?

Ha.

Ha.

Come on. A barbecue
is a great idea.

We'll have it this Friday night.

We'll invite everybody.

Donna, Kelly...
speaking of which...

Kelly wasn't in Spanish
class this morning.

Where is she?

Mrs. Teasley, I was wondering

if I could make a small
change in my schedule.

What did you
have in mind, Kelly?

Well, Donna was telling me

about this incredible
art class she's taking,

and I was wondering
if I can still get in.

I don't recall your ever
expressing any interest

in art before.

Oh, I know.

I just thought since it's
my senior year and all,

maybe it's time for me to
explore my creative side.

Try something new.

Well, there is
room in the class,

but you do realize
switching into art

will necessitate rearranging
your entire schedule.

Oh, really? That's too bad,

but if that's what
we've gotta do.

So, what are you
doing after school?

I told Nikki I'd drop her off
at the Beverly Center. Why?

Uh, well, what about
later on tonight?

Nikki's coming over for dinner.

I mean, you can
come, too, if you want.

No, that's okay.

David, what's wrong?

Is everything all right?

Yeah.

Everything's fine.

Okay.

Private Zuckerman
reporting for duty, sir.

Andrea, just in time.

Take a look at the new layout.

What do you think?

Why are you changing the layout?

Well, the old one's kind
of flat, don't you think?

No, I, uh, I liked it.

Mr. Meyers
thought it looked flat.

So what should I do?

Let's leave the
layout alone, okay?

Andrea's right.

Okay, Chief.

Listen, before I forget,
Meyers thought I should

take a look at
that report you did

on how to streamline the paper.

Oh, he did, did he?

Yeah.

Can I see you outside?

This is not going to work out.

What isn't?

Brandon, you're editor-in-chief.

It's your job to
streamline the paper.

I am merely one
of the foot soldiers.

And I am not gonna hand
over my ideas, which I stayed up

until 2:00 in the morning
to write, so that you

can take the credit.

Andrea, maybe
you're suffering from...

sleep deprivation
or something...

I don't know... 'cause I don't
know where this is coming from.

Gil merely told me
you'd written a report

that may be of some
assistance to me.

Now, if you don't want to
give it to me, it's no big deal.

Gil?

Well, I didn't realize you
guys became so chummy.

Look, Andrea, if you
wanted to be editor so badly,

why'd you back me for the job?

Excuse me.

What was I supposed to do?

Tell him you procrastinate,
that you're disorganized,

that you're not
nearly as qualified

to run The Blaze as I am?

Hold on a second.

No, that's the truth.

You do not have as
much experience as I have,

and you definitely don't
have the commitment!

I can do the job, Andrea,
just as well as you can.

Great.

Then why don't you do the
whole damn thing yourself.

Oh, that's just great, Andrea.

Walk away.

It's not my fault you're too
egotistical to deal with this!

You see, Silver?

This is what it means
to have a manager.

I put up my own bucks for these.

Well, that's great, but
who plays 45s anymore?

Get with the program, David.

I'm gonna put
these in jukeboxes.

I'm gonna have this puppy
playing in every diner in town.

But not here at the Pit, okay?

What are you talking about?
Of course here at the Pit.

Look, Nikki thinks
she's the first person

who heard this song,
and Donna thinks

she's the first person
who heard this song.

You told me I was the first
person who heard this song.

Well, I was excited
about it, okay?

Look, I don't care who was
the first person to hear this song.

It's going into Nat's jukebox.

I know I'm gonna have
to tell Donna about Nikki.

It's just things have
been going so great,

I don't want to ruin it.

So, who says tell
Donna anything?

Well, Kelly and Nikki said...

Kelly and Nikki, Nikki
and Schmikki, okay?

Look, Kelly is
Donna's best friend.

And Nikki, come on, she just
wants to break you guys up

so she could get to you.

So, what do you
think I should do?

Make Nikki a little side dish.

What, are you kidding?

I can't do that.

I don't even want to do that.

All right, but don't tell Donna.

She'll freak.

Well, what if Nikki tells Donna?

You know, the two of them
have gotten pretty tight.

David, let me tell you
three words of advice

that have always worked for me:

Deny, deny, deny.

All I can say is everybody
better be hungry.

You have a ton of food.

Yeah, I guess I better
learn to cook, too, huh?

What?

Brenda, I've never, ever
barbecued anything in my life.

I ordered room
service, remember?

Then what was the show
you put on for my father?

Oh, I was just trying
to be helpful, you know.

I can't cook.

Dylan, what are we gonna do?

This is gonna be
a total disaster.

No, it won't. I
mean, you'll help me,

won't you?

Dylan...

Won't you?

All right.

But the first thing
we better do,

if you're gonna have
a party, is clean up.

Okay, but, Bren, do we
got to do that right now?

What is this?

Looks like an earring.

I know it's an earring, Dylan.

Whose is it?

Must be my mother's.

Remember, I told you
she stopped by here

for a few days on her way to

a convergence retreat in Sedona.

Right.

Well, you better call her
and tell her that you found it.

Well, I will.

I didn't see you
in class yesterday.

What happened? Did you skip?

No.

Actually, I changed
my schedule around.

I wanted to take art with Donna.

No offense, Kel, I've known
you since kindergarten;

you couldn't draw a
straight line if you had a ruler.

Well, maybe it's time I learned.

Maybe.

This is yours, I think.

Oh, thank you.

I was looking for that.

Yeah, well, don't thank
me. Thank Brenda.

She's the one that found it.

You didn't tell her, did you?

No, I didn't tell her.

I said it was my mother's.

Guess I won't be wearing
those earrings anymore.

Kelly...

I didn't like 'em anyway.

Look, for what it's worth,

if you hadn't changed
your schedule, I would have.

That way, it'd be more
comfortable for everybody.

Dylan, I am not doing anything

to make things more
comfortable for everybody.

Just for me.

You and Brenda have each other.

And I don't begrudge you that,

but I don't have to
sit around and watch it

with a perpetual
lump in my throat.

So, are you coming to
the barbecue tonight?

Sure.

I can't believe Dylan's
being so sociable.

I'm telling you,
he's a changed man.

Mmm.

Oh, my God, hide me. Huh?

Hi, Brenda. Hi, Donna.

Hi. Hi, Sue.

Where you going?

Wherever they're taking me.

How do you know her?

That's Sue Scanlon.

Donna, I know who she is.

She's my freshman buddy.

She's also Scott's sister.

Scott Scanlon.

Wow, I can't believe I
didn't make the connection.

Yeah.

Well, my mom says the
family has really fallen apart

since Scott shot himself.

Mrs. Scanlon's always
been kind of weird though.

Like mother, like daughter.

Okay, that's it for today.

Andrea, could you stay
for a minute, please?

How come you've been shooting
me death rays for the last hour?

How come you haven't
called on me in the last hour?

Because I knew you
knew all the answers.

Listen, I was gonna wait
until the newspaper meeting

to tell you this, but I, uh,
might as well tell you now.

I'm resigning from The Blaze.

Why do you want to do that?

Because you ripped
me off, that's why.

I'm the one who saved the paper

when nobody
wanted to work on it.

I found new advertisers.
I recruited staff.

I updated the computer system.

I sacrificed my
nights and weekends.

And then you walk in,
and in one fell swoop,

you take the whole
thing away from me.

My God, Andrea.

I had no idea you felt this way.

Why didn't you
just say something?

Because I wanted you to like me.

I do like you.

But not as much
as you like Brandon.

You know why I put
Brandon in charge.

He's the kind of guy
who needs a push.

We talked about this.

Now, that doesn't mean
I don't think you're terrific.

But don't you think it's time

you learned how
to be a team player?

You're not always gonna
be number one, you know.

And sometimes,
overachievers like you

have to get past their own egos

and learn how to
accept disappointment.

That is so bogus.

If I were a guy, you would be
congratulating me on my ambition

instead of calling
me an overachiever.

You're teaching the male

how to be a leader and the
female how to be a team player.

If you're implying
that I'm sexist,

you are dead wrong.

Oh, really?

Why is it we call
a male assertive

and a female pushy?

Why is a guy tough
and a girl a bitch?

What would Walt
Whitman say about that...

Gil?

I love that art class.

Oh, me, too.

Mrs. Signorelli is great.

You know, I have that same top?

God, we do have a lot in common.

Art, clothes...

And our incredible
taste in guys.

Oh. David is cute, isn't he?

The best.

Listen, Donna, I am so
glad you're okay with all this.

I have to admit I
was real nervous

about David telling you.

What are you talking about?

He didn't tell you?

He promised me
he'd tell you last night.

Well, he didn't.

But I have this feeling
that somebody better.

Donna, please, believe
me, nothing happened.

It's just, when you were
in Paris this summer,

and I came here to
Beverly Hills to visit my aunt,

I met David at the beach club.

So if nothing happened,

why'd you pretend like
you hadn't met him before?

I didn't know if you knew, and
I wasn't sure how you'd take it.

Well, would you mind telling
me just how far things went?

Did you sleep with him, Nikki?

Donna, no!

Please, it was
nothing like that.

We met, we listened to music.

And we just kissed. That's all.

Oh.

So I'm supposed to feel relieved

because all you did was kiss?

That's all we do.

Well, I want you
to know something.

When it came down
to really fooling around,

David told me about you
and said that he couldn't.

If you never want
to talk to me again,

I understand.

But don't blame David, please.

He's such a great guy.

Yeah.

A great guy who somehow
forgot to tell his girlfriend

about the fling he
had this summer.

Donna, don't get mad at him.

No.

I'm not gonna get mad.

I'm gonna get even.

Man.

Hey, what's going on?

They won't give me my books.

Just a little healthy hazing.

Here, Hubert.

What's your problem, Sanders?

Look, Miller.

You can pick on all
the freshmen you want.

Just not my freshman, okay?

You know this nerd?

Yeah, I do.

Now beat it, kid.

Thank you, sir.

You really are a
nerd, aren't you?

Don't call me "sir."

Fine.

As long as you
don't call me Hubert.

Let's go, Herbert.

Don't you think it's about
time we introduced ourselves?

Hi, I'm Nikki Witt.

Brandon Walsh.

Well, maybe we'll run into
each other again sometime.

Maybe.

Sue.

Oh, don't mind me.

I'm just doing my
daily "makeover" again.

Time to turn back

into little Susie Sunshine.

Hey, I know from experience

what it's like pretending
to be somebody you're not.

Yeah, well, it beats
hassling with my mother.

You think so?

You don't know my mother.

Yes, I do...

and I knew your brother, too.

Before or after he shot himself?

Actually, I didn't
know Scott that well.

But I was at his
birthday party that night,

and I was there

when David Silver
buried a time capsule

in Scott's memory.

And I can be there for
you, too, if you want.

Why?

Because you say
you were Scott's friend

or because you
feel sorry for me?

Because you're my
freshman buddy...

and I hate to see
you working so hard

just to earn a bad reputation.

Look, I don't care what you or
anybody else thinks about me.

Well, obviously, you care

about what your mother thinks.

Otherwise, you wouldn't bother

cleaning up your
act every afternoon.

She's going to learn the
truth eventually, you know.

You don't know what it's
like living in that house.

Look, if you want to
talk to a counselor,

I could give you
some people to call.

Thanks.

I just might take
you up on that.

Anytime.

How's it going?

I'm not a happy camper.

It could take me three weeks

just to get the budget in order.

Not to mention
assigning features,

selling ad space, paste-up.

I know.

It's a lot of responsibility.

What's the matter, Gil?

Are you feeling guilty about
ruining my carefree youth?

Guilty, yes.

But not about you.

It's about Andrea.

She really laid into me.

It's my fault.

How could I put
her in the tough spot

of having to choose
between her own ambitions

and her affections for you?

Do you think I'm sexist?

What's that got to do with this?

Everything.

I can't believe I
was so oblivious.

I've read all the
studies, Brandon...

about how teachers don't call
on teenage girls as much as guys

and that time and
time again they'll ignore

even the most talented
female student in favor of a boy.

I never thought I'd do it.

Listen...

I... I don't want to sound
like a quitter 'cause I'm not...

but if you want to give
the paper back to Andrea,

I'd understand.

I don't think that'd
be fair to either of you.

Yeah, maybe you're right.

How do we get out
of the doghouse?

I had a feeling
I'd find you here.

You wanna proof
our new masthead?

Brandon... No, Andrea,

just take a look
at it, would ya?

This says Brandon Walsh
and Andrea Zuckerman,

Co-editors-in-chief. Yup.

My first executive decision.

Look, I don't need your
pity, okay, Brandon?

Andrea, it's not pity.

The Blaze is your
paper. It's your passion.

Let me be your partner.

We make a good team, you and me.

You and I.

So are we partners or what?

Sounds good to me, Chief.

Co-chief.

So when do we start?

We start on Monday.

Tonight,

we party.

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Take it somewhere crazy... ♪

There's a Zen
thing with the, uh,

barbecue here, Steve.

You gotta become
one with the burger.

Yeah, well, those
burgers look like

they've become
one with the grill.

Hey, man, this spatula can
become one with your face.

Ooh. Ooh, come on.

I hate violence.

Dylan, hi.

Hey, Donna.

Nikki?

Brandon?

Do you two know each other?

Um, we've bumped into
each other a few times.

Yeah.

♪ You know where it's going ♪

♪ I'm following your lead ♪

♪ Slow down for the taking ♪

♪ Be just how you... ♪

Kelly, where've you been?

Oh, uh...

David couldn't
decide what to wear.

Uh, could you
excuse me a second?

Sure.

We need to talk.

Sure.

Alone.

Right.

David, I can't take it anymore.

You've got to tell Donna
about us right away.

Look, Nikki, there is no us.

But David, I want you.

I know, but you're
gonna have to get over it.

Look, I love Donna,

and I know I should
have told her, and I will.

But I've just gotta wait
for the right moment.

You've gotta stop.

Busted!

Donna...

I think he passed the test.

Yeah, good thing.

Wait, what's going on here?

Boyfriends are so hard

to train these
days, aren't they?

You mean you two
were in on this together?

Okay, you got me.

So, does that mean
you're not mad at me?

Mm-hmm.

Not anymore.

Look, I'm sorry. I love you.

You know that.

Yeah. I do.

Come here.

Sick... both of you.

Donna.

I've only got one
more question for you

and then we'll put this whole
"Senior Buddy" business

out of its misery.

Yeah, what do you want to know?

Does Brandon Walsh
have a girlfriend?

What's the matter, Kel?

Nothing.

I'm fine. Come on.

I know you better than that.

I'm just going through
a senior slump.

And it's only been half a week.

You know what I think?

What?

I think you're
lonely. That's all.

Hey, don't worry.

It'll be a great
year for both of us.

You'll see.

Yeah.

We'll find you a guy.

One as great as Dylan.

Thanks, Bren.