Betty (2020–…): Season 1, Episode 1 - Betty - full transcript

[bright tone]

[traffic sounds]

[camera shutter clicking]

♪ I know you've been ♪

♪ I know you've been ♪

♪ I know you've been ♪

♪ I know you've been ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Baby ♪

[siren wailing]

♪ You don't ♪



♪ ♪

♪ Babe ♪

♪ On me ♪

♪ I know you've been ♪

Yo, what's up?

Um, are you there yet?
I'm almost at the spot.

Yes, I'm on my way.

She's not even close
to being ready, Kirt.

- Oh, my gosh, shut up.
- Look at her.

Yes, I am.

Seriously, Janay?

Yo, what's up, Donald? What's up?

What up, Kirt?

Oh, I made snacks.



- I made oatmeal raisins.
- Boo.

Yo, you got drinks, right?

Yeah, I got drinks.

I don't know if
people are gonna come.

I'm kind of nervous.

We gonna be good. It's gonna be lit.

- [horns honking]
- What the fuck?

Are you okay?

Yeah, I'm okay.

Just come, bro. You're taking mad long.

All right, bye. Bye.

♪ ♪

Okay, Donald, time to go.

All right, I'm leaving.

♪ ♪

I'm already gone. I left.

- Come on, seriously!
- Okay!

I have to go.

♪ ♪

♪ Babe ♪

♪ Babe ♪

♪ I know ♪

♪ Babe ♪

♪ ♪

Wow!

- Fucking late, bitch.
- Sorry. I'm sorry.

It's mad crowded.

We could've gone
somewhere less extra.

I know, but girls are gonna
come, bro, I'm telling you.

Yo, I told you to
make the post last week.

This is why.

But time is an
illusion, anyways, dude.

I keep telling you
that. It doesn't matter.

Well, you wanna know
what ain't an illusion?

- What?
- Ain't no one here.

None of the girls.

There's a girl
sitting right there, bro.

- She got a board.
- Yo!

Yo!

Yo, are you here for the girl sesh?

I guess.

See, I told you, word of mouth!

You know the new word of
mouth is the Internet, right?

Right, she said the Internet
was the new word of mouth!

Oh, my God! Whatever,
she's still here.

- I told you.
- My name...

- I told you.
- My name is Janay.

- And this is Kirt.
- Hey, I'm Kirt.

Hi, I'm Honeybear.

That name's pretty sweet.

Why?

Because honey is sweet, duh.

Okay, you got a camera.

What you be filming?

Everything.

- So you wanna use it?
- Yeah.

- This is hilarious.
- What's so funny?

Bring it back, bring it back.

[laughs]

- Yo!
- Yo!

Yo, thanks for coming
through to the sesh.

Huh?

Um, the all-girls skate session

that we posted on Instagram.

Oh, no. I don't know about that.

Uh, what's it about?

Yeah, Camille, see what it's about.

Let's skate with them.

- What the fuck is your problem?
- All right, guys!

Sorry, I... I guess I don't follow you.

It's all good.

Look, well, if you wanna
skate with us, we'll be around.

Okay?

And I got some
Arizona if you want some.

All right, cool.

We have snacks.

You know, we can play
S-K-A-T-E, whatever.

Yeah, we can play S-K-A-T-E.

[laughter]

[upbeat percussive music]

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

- [laughter]
- Yo, you okay?

♪ I know you want to ♪

♪ ♪

♪ I know you want to ♪

♪ Why are you so scared? ♪

♪ ♪

♪ I know you want to ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

[thunder cracks]

What the fuck? Yo,
get in Mama's Deli!

Come on.

♪ ♪

[indistinct chatter]

♪ ♪

- [indistinct chatter]
- Next. Stop hitting...

Wait, wait, wait, that's not your bag.

Wait, wait motherfuckers.
Don't jump, don't snatch.

- How much you said it was?
- $1,000.

But I don't have any money.

Because I like you,
I'm gonna give you

a tab today, no problem.

$1,000, now let's go.

- Thank you.
- $1,000, guys.

Let me get a bacon, egg, and cheese,

extra crispy, please.

- Philip!
- Yo.

You going to the Winter Bowl?

Yeah, man, I just
ordered, though, man.

If you wanna, so just meet us there.

Yeah, man, no doubt.

Wait, wait, Camille,
let me get that backpack.

All my shit's in there.

Uh, I think I forgot it at the park.

Man, what the fuck?

Shit!

- Fuck, um...
- Go fucking get it, then.

Run! Come on.

Fuck, she always do this shit.

Yo, you didn't have
to bug out like that.

- Okay, now get out.
- She left my shit!

Get out my store, please.

How would you feel
if she left your shit?

When I say out, out!

- I got a sandwich.
- Out!

That's it, done.

[car horns honking]

- It's not there?
- Dude...

Dude, my whole life is in there.

My whole life's in there too;

my phone, my wallet, my ID.

My wallet, my keys,
and my Winter Bowl key.

Fucking shit, Camille!

Yo, who steals a backpack
from a skate park anyway?

Like, go steal a briefcase or something.

You said your phone was in there?

- Yeah.
- No, I still got my

phone on me, thank God.

Use his phone, then.
Use Find my iPhone.

- Can't.
- [chuckles]

Are you for real?

I don't trust the government. You do?

Hey, Camille, that's
your name, right?

Look, if you want, you can use the app.

I have it on my phone.

This sucks!

I can't even get into
Winter Bowl without my key.

Yeah, well, welcome to
every day of our lives.

What the fuck is
that supposed to mean?

Do you know one
girl that's got a key?

You don't. Neither do I.

Whatever...

It's working!

Philip, look.

Yo, what are we waiting
for? Let's go catch that bitch.

And then once we catch them,

you can get us into Winter Bowl, deal?

- Fine, come on, let's go.
- Yeah, okay, let's go.

[upbeat dramatic music]

♪ ♪

Oh, shit, look!

- Yo, Farouk!
- Yo, 'Rouk!

Yo, it's Farouk Farouk!

[laughs] What up?

Kirt the Squirt, what up?

Yo, don't call me that, bro.

Okay, Janay, hi. How are you?

- Philip, what's up, buddy?
- What's up, my buddy?

The hell you guys up to, man?

It looks like you're on
some kind of fucking mission.

Dude, you don't even know.
All my shits got jacked.

- What?
- Everything!

Somebody fucking jacked you?

No, not like that.

Like, his shit was in Camille's bag

and it got lifted from the park earlier.

Oh, shit.

You happen to see anyone

walk by with, like, a yellow backpack?

What? Nah. Nah, and
I been here all day.

I got these streets on lock.

Yo, Farouk, who is that?

That's Indigo. You
know Indigo, right?

- I'm about to.
- Trying to smoke?

- I'm about to.
- Shit, I'm down too.

- Phillip.
- What?

- Are you serious?
- What... I need a break.

Look, my socks are still wet.

I still never got my damn sandwich.

We need to regroup, Camille.

- Regroup?
- Yes.

We haven't even grouped yet.

Listen, Camille, I
need to go get high,

so I'm gonna go do that.

Excuse me.

- Hi, Indigo.
- Hey.

- Um, can I hit that?
- Sure.

Thanks. My name is Kirt.

Yo, smoke it in the
car. What are you doing?

Get in the car.

You know what?

You... you can go if
you want, it's fine.

What? No. What? I'm not done here yet.

Honeybear, we're gonna just
leave our stuff in the car.

Can you watch it for us?

'Cause I don't trust

these stoned-ass fools right now.

Yeah, I got you.

Wait, you guys aren't coming?

Um, I'm gonna be on,
uh, street patrol duty!

I'll be watching.

Camille, my backpack!

Yo, you know I never
fucking lose anything.

Like, that's some weird shit!

I'm known for not losing shit,

but I'm here losing shit.

Plus, I'm starving.

Like, this shit... This whole situation,

it's just hard, man.

How is it hard, bro?

You're just sitting
in a van, getting high.

Whatever. Whatever.

Wait...

Yo, Farouk, what are these
foo-ass Supreme shirts?

Yo, don't worry about it, buddy.

That's easy money right there.

Hey, don't touch the merchandise, man.

Farouk, what kind of
weed is this by the way?

Chill out back there, Snoop Dogg.

Man, you never buy shit.

Fuck, it's the free kind, man.

- This shit different.
- Pass it, dude.

Yo, what are you doing back there, man?

You eating it?

Still don't get why you
got these bum-ass T-shirts...

Yo, stop touching my shit.
Don't open it. Don't open it.

- You're lowering the value.
- Let me see, bro.

You got so many. They're
all fake anyway, son.

- [laughter]
- This costs like $2 to make.

Now you fucking with my money, man.

Oh, Supreme, oh...

Wait, look! There it is!

- Stop!
- Hey, fucking thief!

- Hold the bag!
- Give the bag back!

- What?
- Wait, this isn't it.

What?

Look, sorry, just kidding.
Um, don't do drugs!

Yeah. Stay in school.

Oh, suck my dick!

[laughter]

- Listening?
- Yes.

All right, this right here is...

- 30, 30 pack.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You bring me back 1,000 for that.

Wait... wait, no, no.

You bring back 1,500 for that.

- Mm
-hmm.

Right? Wait...

Call it a G and a half.

Yeah, pretty sure 1,500, buddy.

You don't even know what
the fuck you're talking about.

- That could be true, but...
- [laughs]

Just bring back the
money. Is this shit lit?

Yo, where the fuck is PJ?

- Who?
- PJ!

Trying to get this fucking sh-money.

- Sh-money?
- Sh-money.

- Bread, the dope, the dinner roll.
- Yeah, I get it, buddy.

Oh... [laughs]

Hey, Indigo.

Hey.

Have you ever skated before?

Nah.

Well, maybe I could
teach you how sometime.

- [snorts]
- [laughter]

What the fuck are you laughing at?

I teach women how to skateboard.

Yeah, if y'all think that's
funny, y'all got a problem.

Whoa, whoa.

Uh, I think we're laughing because

it seemed like Kirt was
trying to get with Indigo.

- Yeah.
- Well, I wasn't.

It's not my fault if my "let's skate"

and my "let's smash"
vibes got some overlap.

Well, I don't know about skating,

'cause, like, I'm into chill shit.

But it is chill. It's so fun.

Nah.

I don't want a bunch of...
I don't need a bunch of guys

- watching me fall on my ass all day.
- But that's the thing.

Skateboarding is not about
landing tricks all the time,

that's why girls are so intimidated,

they think that's what
they need to do, like...

it's just about having fun,

it doesn't matter how
many tricks you have.

Yeah, but it helps. It helps a lot.

Yo, don't listen to him, though.

He's a boy, he doesn't count.

She's not wrong, though.

Society's getting to that
place, you know what I mean?

- Word.
- Wait, what place?

See? Exactly.

You're onto something,
buddy. I like that.

- Word?
- Yeah.

♪ I love bad bitches
that's my fuckin' problem ♪

♪ And yeah, I like to fuck,
I got a fuckin' problem ♪

♪ I love bad bitches
that's my fuckin' problem ♪

♪ And yeah, I like to fuck,
I got a fuckin' problem ♪

♪ I love bad bitches
that's my fuckin' problem ♪

♪ And yeah, I like to fuck,
I got a fuckin' problem ♪

♪ If findin' somebody real
is your fuckin' problem ♪

♪ Bring your girls to the crib ♪

♪ Maybe we can solve it, hey ♪

♪ Hold up, bitches simmer down ♪

♪ Takin' hella long,
bitch, give it to me now ♪

♪ Make that thing pop
like a semi or a nine ♪

♪ Ooh, baby, like it raw
with the shimmy, shimmy ya ♪

♪ Huh? ASAP get like me ♪

I just, like, sat down.

'Cause I told you, felt like
a bullet was in my chest.

♪ ♪

That girl hurt my heart, man.

She hurt my heart.

♪ And fuckin' bitches,
she rollin' Swishers ♪

♪ Brought her bitches,
I brought my niggas ♪

♪ They gettin' bent
up off the liquor ♪

Over there.

- Right here, right?
- Yeah, yeah.

♪ But least a nigga nigga rich ♪

♪ I be fuckin' broads
like I be fuckin' bored ♪

You see anything?

No, it's definitely not here.

♪ I love bad bitches
that's my fuckin' problem ♪

♪ And yeah, I like to fuck,
I got a fuckin' problem ♪

♪ I love bad bitches
that's my fuckin' problem ♪

♪ And yeah, I like to fuck,
I got a fuckin' problem ♪

♪ I love bad bitches
that's my fuckin' problem ♪

♪ And yeah, I like to fuck,
I got a fuckin' problem ♪

♪ If findin' somebody real
is your fuckin' problem ♪

♪ Bring your girls to the
crib maybe we can solve it ♪

♪ Oh, I know you love
it when this beat is on ♪

♪ Make you think about
all of the niggas ♪

♪ You been leadin' on,
make me think about ♪

♪ All of the rappers
I've been feedin' on ♪

♪ Got a feelin'
that's the same dudes ♪

♪ That we speakin' on, oh, word ♪

Oh, look. Over here, over here.

♪ Have a fuckin' read-along,
ain't a fuckin' sing-along ♪

♪ Unless you brought
the weed along ♪

There's just so many people and...

♪ Then just drop down
and get your eagle on ♪

♪ Or we can stare up at the
stars and put the Beatles on ♪

Wait, have you seen
a yellow backpack?

Uh... okay, just come, come.

♪ ♪

It's in the mall
somewhere, it just keeps...

The dot's just over the mall.

♪ ♪

That way. That way. That way.

Oh, God, why's there so many things?

Oh...

What are you doing? Stop!

Pay attention!

[groans]

Sorry, have you seen,
um, a yellow backpack?

[slow music]

♪ ♪

- You already have glasses.
- Now we're real cops.

- Wait!
- What?

- It's in the mall!
- [laughing]

[sighs]

Do you know where this bag is?

Do you guys... do you guys
know where this bag is?

It's, like, yellow like you.

- Wait, oh, shit.
- What?

It's moving out of the
mall. It's moving out.

Out of the mall?

Excuse me, young lady,

could you help me with the key?

Sorry, we're in a rush right now.

Of course, sir, no problem.

That's so nice. Thank you.

Surprise rain today.

- Yep.
- Yeah.

You girls coming from high school?

- No, we're not.
- Oh.

No.

This has to be the right
key, it's the last one.

Well, I tried every key.

Maybe I put them in the wrong way.

- Okay, here you go.
- Thank you.

Put this foot on
the board right here.

Right here.

- Hold me, though.
- No, you got it, you got it.

- Okay, okay.
- And the other foot, yeah.

- Okay.
- And now spread your legs apart.

And bend your knees.

- Bend your knees.
- Okay.

Bend them more. Yeah.

- Okay.
- Now I'm gonna push you, okay?

- Oh, God.
- I'm gonna push you.

- Okay.
- Yeah!

No, no, no. I don't know if I can...

- I'm gonna let go now.
- No!

Bend your knees! Bend your knees!

Oh, shit. Oh, shit.

[laughter]

Shit. I'm doing it! [laughing]

Hold up... one second.

- What's good?
- Where the fuck you been at?

- We've been waiting on you mad long.
- You know the train.

PJ and the fucking train, yeah, yeah.

- What do you need?
- Uh, let me just get two.

That's it?

You know, my pockets is
not doing so good these days.

You look like a fucking cowboy.

I was just in Arizona,
I was with my grandpa.

You know, I had to change the steeze up.

That's cute, I'm into it.

- Thank you.
- I'm a fan.

Actually, let me get two more.

Ah, that's what I like to hear.

- I'll help your pockets out.
- That's two hundo.

Man, this weed shit get
more expensive every day.

Always.

Thank you.

No problem. You skate now?

- Yeah, it's whatever.
- Be safe, yo.

- Yeah, see you later.
- All right.

Why you looking at me like that?

Hey, Tony Hawk, guess what?

Nobody holds their trucks
on their skateboard!

How the fuck do I hold it?

You acting mad cool, you just...

[laughing]

Hold it like this, like you?

Mm, I'm Kirt.

How I hold my skateboard.

Ah, ah.

This is my purse.

- [laughs]
- It's my new purse.

Do you love it? It's cute, right?

[laughter]

Oh, look, look!

I guess they didn't change
the doorknob after all.

Thank you girls so much.

Here's a butterscotch.

Oh, it's okay. We're... we're good.

For the pretty ladies.

Thank you.

[chuckles]

Okay. Oh, Lord. We're leaving now.

- [chuckles]
- Okay.

I love you.

What the fuck was that?

I don't know.

I have no idea.

He was mad... He
was like coming at you.

- I know!
- He thought you were cute.

He thought you were cute.

Why you still have it in your hand?

Throw that out.

It probably has, like, razor
blades in it or something.

I know.

[groans] That stuff is so creepy, man.

Gosh.

It reminds me of, like, when I would

take the bus to school

and there was this one bus driver

who would just always say things like,

"Oh, you're getting
prettier and prettier.

Ew!

Oh, if you were
just ten years older."

All that bullshit.

- Did you tell your parents?
- No, I... no.

Why not?

I don't know, I... I didn't
want to get him in trouble

and... I guess I was just...

I just thought he was
being nice, you know?

[sighs] That's why we have boards,

so we don't have to take the bus.

We don't need to talk to anybody.

Just hop on our board, we're out.

Yo, that is like the most
important shit, right, like...

- Water?
- What?

- No. Water?
- The most important shit.

- I don't even drink water.
- Ew.

How the fuck are you still alive?

- I just eat fruit, man.
- That's gross.

You don't need water. It's a myth.

Yes, you do!

No, all you have to
do is eat fruit, man.

Watermelon, hello.

You can't survive off of watermelon.

Yeah, watermelon and hot dogs, buddy.

But, no, for real,

you know what the most
important thing is?

- Family.
- No fucking way.

- What?
- What, you see the backpack?

- That's my fucking uncle.
- What? Where?

- What?
- Uncle Rick!

Yo, call me when you find my phone.

I'll be back.

What? He has his fucking phone.

Classic Phil, dude.

- Dumb-ass.
- He always does that shit.

He's so smacked.

Yeah, well...

Yo, yo, Kirt, Kirt. Look, look, look.

Look what I found.

- Why don't you drink water?
- That shit's gross.

Yo!

- What's wrong with you?
- What?

That's the guy who
took the fucking backpack!

What?

- What? For real?
- Yeah.

That is there, though.

We should go in the park.
We have to go in the park.

- [ringtone playing]
- Wait, hold on.

Kirt is calling me.

- Hello?
- Yo, Janay, you have no idea.

- Yeah?
- We found him!

What?

We know what the
motherfucker looks like!

Yo, let's go, let's go.

Yo! Yo!

Look at her camera.

We got the guy on her fucking camera.

What?

Oh, my God.

This motherfucker.

[indistinct chatter]

Yo, that's him! That's him!

Wait, Kirt, strategy!

Yo, give us the
backpack, you fucking thief.

[speaking Spanish]

No, don't not speak English, man.

We know you understand us!

[speaking Spanish]

Hey, hey!

[speaking Spanish]

- No!
- [speaking Spanish]

[both speaking Spanish]

Is everything there?

All right, what the fuck, bro?

There ain't nothing but
crap in that shit anyway.

- Fuck you, bitch!
We habla español too!

Fuck out of here.

Got it?

- We're good.
- [all cheering]

Fuck, yes! We did it!

Oh, my God...

Yo, you...

- Fuck, yeah, dude.
- Fuck, yeah.

Damn, we're like Dora
and the Explorers, dude.

- [sighs]
- Trying to take our backpack.

Damn, that shit took long enough.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- [laughs]

Yo, Indigo, hit me up on the Gram.

We should go skate.

I'm down.

- Oh, shit.
- What?

Oh, the keys are in my pocket.

Whoa, slow down. What's up, girls?

It's good, we have a key.

Oh, you have a key, that's cool.

- Is it yours?
- Well...

Well, I didn't think so.

Never seen none of you before.

It's Philip's and we're using it.

Yeah, she's cool. She can come in.

All right, you're good to go.

Skrrt.

I don't know about the rest of y'all.

Camille?

It's not my call.

What am I supposed to do?

What the fuck? Are you kidding me?

- Damn, that bitch is cold.
- What?

- [thunder cracks]
- What the fuck?

♪ Brings me spring ♪

♪ Don't care about nothing ♪

♪ She brings the rain ♪

♪ Oh, yeah, she brings the rain ♪

♪ In the dawn of the silvery day ♪

♪ Clouds seem to melt away ♪

♪ She brings the rain ♪

♪ Oh, yeah, she brings the rain ♪

♪ She brings the rain,
it feels like spring ♪

♪ Magic mushrooms out of dreams ♪

♪ She brings the rain ♪

♪ Oh, yeah, she brings the rain ♪

♪ ♪

♪ So mellow yellow,
gray disappears ♪

♪ Flying on the raven's wing ♪

♪ She brings the rain ♪

[bright tone]

- Yeah.
- Yes.

- Okay.
- Okay.

- I know what you're doing.
- I know what you're doing.

- I bet you won't do this.
- I bet you won't do this.

Yo!

- (GASPS)
- Is that Bambi's new video?

- Hi, Camille!
- Hey, what's up?

Yo, Honeybear! This is
Ash! Good news, she is gay!

It's okay, she's just shy.

INDIGO: I don't feel like having

a bunch of thirsty
skaters just looking at me.

I'm already over it.

Come on, I'ma teach you
how to go down this ramp.

What?!

- How close are you with Adam?
- Why?

- I need to talk to you.
- (STAMMERS) Whoa, watch out.

What the hell is going on?!