Benson (1979–1986): Season 1, Episode 12 - Taylor's Bid - full transcript
Taylor runs for public office.
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
(DOG BARKING)
(EXCLAIMING)
What was that?
Almost two points.
Pick that up.
Pardon me, Kraus, I
have trouble with my ears.
I hear everything you say.
Good, then why don't you pick
that up and put it in the basket?
Why don't you get on that
broom and fly out of here?
Good morning.
What's going on, Benson?
My aim is poor and so
is Kraus's personality.
Is this the problem?
There.
Can we be friends?
What and ruin a
beautiful relationship?
You know, Benson,
personally I feel that
you and I can develop
a long and
meaningful association.
Oh, really?
Can we do it by phone?
Oh, that is funny. I like that.
So, what's this
lottery for anyway?
Fresh air fund. Mmm-hmm.
If you win first
prize, you get a car.
Then you can sell the
car and buy gas for it.
I already have a car, honey.
Second prize is
a trip to Hawaii.
I've been to Hawaii.
I laid my towel on the beach
and went for a swim.
When I came back,
they'd built a
condominium on it.
I will buy the whole book.
It's $10.
Well, it's a very worthy cause.
Now, just think of it, Katie.
What would we
have without fresh air?
Gills.
God, you're funny.
What's with him?
He's being awfully nice today.
He must want something from us.
Whatever it is, he
ain't getting it from me.
Good morning, everybody.
ALL: Morning, Governor.
Would you like a cup of coffee?
Yes, thank you.
Goodness gracious, sakes alive.
Governor, watch your language.
There are ladies present.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I can't help it.
It's that Representative Hofer.
That old fogey has
done it to me again.
First, he blocked my reform
legislation in committee.
Then he led the fight against
my Environmental Protection Act.
Now this. What's he done?
He died.
Will the man stop at nothing?
Well, I have to call a
special election to fill his seat
and guess who's going to run?
ALL: Taylor.
He told you?
In so many strokes.
Well, I know this must
be a terrible shock to you.
Words fail me.
Me, too. He's such a help
to me in so many ways.
What'll I do without him?
Better.
Taylor had a way of... of
making the most difficult issues
acceptable to the public.
I don't know how he did it.
He lied.
And in respect to
the financial
indebtedness of this project,
additional monies can be
allocated from the general fund
pursuant to the instructions received
from the state comptroller's office
and additional taxation
will not be required.
What do you have so far?
Writer's cramp.
Governor, you're going twice
as fast as you normally do.
Well, I have twice as
much work as I normally do.
Have you received the
reply from Senator Douglas?
I haven't even typed
up the request. Why not?
You just dictated it.
(KNOCK ON DOOR)
Come in.
Hi, Governor.
I found the notes from your dinner
meeting with Councilman Van Platt.
Oh, you're a lifesaver.
Where were they?
Now the proposal was written
on the back of this coaster
which I found in the left
pocket of your grey suit.
The counterproposal was
written on the back of this napkin
which I found in the left-hand
pocket of your raincoat.
Now this is a
pocket-size notebook,
a present from me.
Thank you, Benson. Benson. Huh?
I've got a problem.
What is it? Taylor.
He's coming back.
No.
Then what's the problem?
Oh, well, it's not
actually a problem.
Well, see, the problem...
Taylor's coming over today
for the Governor's
endorsement in this election.
Now, the Governor doesn't feel
he can endorse any one
candidate until after the primary.
That's the problem.
Good afternoon, everybody.
Taylor, come in. How's
the campaign going?
Ah, it just couldn't
be better. Good.
But I'm going to need a little help
from each and every one of you.
Sorry, I left my wallet
in my other pants.
Taylor, it isn't easy
for me to say this...
Uh, in all fairness, sir,
I think I should tell you,
I'm taking Marcy with me as
my administrative assistant.
Your what?
Congratulations.
It's a big step up for her.
Taylor, could I say
something about this?
I can handle this, Marcy.
And based on your record, sir,
I know you wouldn't want to stand in
the way of a woman's advancement.
How about a woman's consent?
Taylor, you and I never even
discussed my going to work for you.
Fine, Marcy, you want to
stand on formality, you've got it.
Would you like to
come to work for me?
No.
I'm perfectly happy
where I am. Thank you.
Okay, fine, I can accept that.
Loser.
Taylor, about my
endorsement of you,
I've given this
a lot of thought.
Yes, well, so have I, sir,
and, frankly, your popularity
in this particular district, it's...
It's virtually non-existent,
to put it kindly,
and your endorsement
could hurt me.
Then by all means,
give it to him.
You mean you don't
want my endorsement?
Oh, no, absolutely not.
Oh, this was easier
than I thought.
Governor, you're
due at the capitol
and I've got two hours'
worth of typing to do.
Oh, we've got to
get those letters out.
Listen, if it would help any,
I'll just sign the
bottom of the page
and you can type down to there.
And if there's any left over,
I'll just make it a P.S.
See you, Taylor.
Benson, my friend,
I would like you to be a
spokesman for my campaign.
Oh, really?
Yes, it is an opportunity for
you to show some leadership.
I see. To influence people.
Mmm-hmm.
And would these people
happen to be black?
Well, now that you mention it,
almost 20% of the district
is of the black persuasion.
Persuasion.
Well, yes.
Well, actually, what I meant
to say was black, um, um...
People?
Black people.
Black people.
I like that. I'm
going to use it.
I like that. I'm
going to use it.
You want me to think
that isn't the old maid
because it looks
like it is the old maid.
Pick, pick.
(SCREAMS)
It is the old maid.
Never use reverse
psychology on anyone under 10.
I'll remember that,
Minnesota Shrimp.
Good night, Benson.
Good night, sugar.
Governor. What now?
Hello.
Oh, right. Hello.
Getting your own coffee now?
Well, why not? I've got to do
everything else for myself now.
Well, you don't have to.
Find somebody to replace Taylor.
Well, the party actually
recommended somebody,
but he was indicted yesterday.
Sir, take a breather.
Oh, I don't have time.
Then take a breath.
Here, have a seat.
Oh, that feels good.
Why are you doing this?
You just told me to.
No, I mean, why are you
rushing around like this?
Are you gonna just
do it until you drop?
Could I answer that
with a little story?
I'd prefer a yes or no.
One summer vacation,
I took a job that
nobody else wanted.
I worked in an amusement
park pitch-ball concession.
Whenever the ball
would hit the bull's-eye,
Bloopo the clown fell
into a tank of water.
Bloopo the clown.
Mmm-hmm.
I was Bloopo.
Mmm-hmm.
You would be surprised
how many people throw well.
But no matter how many times
I was knocked into
that tank of water,
I always dragged
myself back up again.
Do you know why?
No, I can't imagine.
Because there was
no other Bloopo.
If I didn't do it, who would?
That is exactly the reason
I am working so hard today.
Well, if this job gets
to be too much for you,
you can always go back
to being Bloopo the clown.
Oh, I'm sure they have
somebody else by now.
Hello, Benson. How are you?
What are you doing here?
Oh, I was just in the
neighborhood and I, uh...
Have you made up your mind?
Yeah.
I can't help you, Taylor.
What?
Oh, I see.
You're going to support Davis.
I haven't decided.
But you're not gonna support me.
That I've decided.
Why not?
Well, because I've thought
about it and in my opinion
there are at least
two other people
who are better
qualified for the job.
(EXCLAIMING)
You drive a hard
bargain, Benson.
All right, what is
it that you want?
A clear conscience.
All right, all kidding aside,
with your help,
the black people's vote is mine.
Now, just think of it,
you could make the difference.
No, I can't.
No, you mean, you won't.
No, I mean, I can't.
I don't have any influence.
Why should people listen to me?
Maybe if you got Muhammad
Ali or somebody like that.
But you put me on the platform
and all you're going to get
is a big round of ho-hum.
Benson.
You've gotta help me.
I don't know any other blacks.
I mean, where I went to school
there were no blacks.
Look, these are just
a few small favors
and you will be repaid in time.
All right, maybe
this is a bit much,
but surely you'll appear with me
when I address the
N.A.A.C.P. chapter.
Well, for God's sakes, Benson,
you don't have to say anything.
All you have to do is stand
next to me, maybe give me a hug.
How does that sound?
Unpleasant.
Benson, it is not my fault
where I lived when I was a kid
there were no black people.
And what about now?
You're not a kid anymore.
Well, I... I...
Well, Taylor, for whatever it's
worth, you're the perfect politician.
Can I quote you on that?
Being a politician isn't enough.
In order to represent the people,
you've gotta be one of them.
What are you saying,
that I'm not a person?
In a word, yes.
All right, Benson.
You have had your opportunity
and you blew it.
I was gonna take you with me,
right up to the top,
but you have shown
yourself for what you are.
Selfish and rude
and not too bright.
Are you through?
No, but you are.
Benson, don't underestimate me.
Taylor, that isn't possible.
I'm calling from the
governor's office.
He'd like the results
as soon as possible.
Yes, I'll hold.
I hate to admit this, but I
have mixed feelings about this.
A secret part of me is
hoping that Taylor doesn't win.
I could really use
his help around here.
Here are the returns.
Yeah, what was that
figure for Harlan? Uh-huh.
Davidson?
Okay, Jacobs.
Yeah, got it. Now, go on.
Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Gee, your handwriting's
worse than mine.
That's shorthand.
Those are the final returns?
Okay, thank you.
How'd he do?
He lost.
He lost.
He came in sixth.
How could he?
There were only five candidates.
There was a large write-in
for "none of the above."
Well, I'm gonna get my coat.
I think we should all go over to
Taylor's campaign headquarters
and let him know that
he's still wanted back here.
Well, I don't think he's gonna
want to come back here, sir.
Well, of course he will.
He's a politician.
What else is he qualified to do?
He'd make a hell of a Bloopo.
I can't believe
that no one is here.
It's over, Kraus.
You can go now.
Oh, no, you hired me
to cater for three hours.
Forget it. Just go home.
Free food und still you
can't get anyone to come.
Hi, Taylor.
Oh, Miss Kraus. How
nice of you to be here.
He paid me to be here.
Hello, Taylor.
Well, I'm not surprised
to see you here, Benson.
Are you here to kick
me while I'm down?
No, I can wait till
you're feeling better.
We just wanted to
come and join your party.
Well, this is it.
Whoopee.
Everybody left when the votes
from the first precinct came in,
and I didn't have any.
Taylor, this is
your first time out.
Yeah, the people just didn't
get a chance to know you.
My grandmother
lives in that precinct.
Sir, I think we ought
to get out of here.
I think Taylor wants
to be left alone.
Oh, we can't leave
him now, Benson.
He'll get the idea
nobody likes him.
I think the cat's
out of the bag, sir.
I called up the newspapers
to give them my
concession speech.
They hung up on me.
I'd like to hear it.
So would I, Taylor.
I'll be in the car.
No, wait, he writes
wonderful speeches.
Friends, family,
loyal supporters,
and the morbidly curious.
The results are in and
the voters have spoken.
But what do they know?
The time has come to close ranks
and forget our differences.
Let us forget the hopes
that we had for the future.
We must abandon the dreams.
It was a small dream.
I wanted to be somebody
that people looked up to.
Oh, Taylor.
The time has come
(BLUBBERING) to give up.
Come on, Taylor, a lot of great
politicians lost their first election.
It's not the end of the world.
Believe it or not,
you've still got
a lot of people
who care about you
and you've got a great job, man.
Let's go home.
And it is all your fault.
If you had gotten behind
me, just gotten behind me,
it would have been a
whole different story.
Oh, Taylor, the black vote didn't
make the difference, you know that.
Your old job's waiting for
you. We want you back.
Sir, there is absolutely
no way in the world
that I would consider
coming back to work
as long as that man
is still in the house.
How could he say that?
There is no excuse
for that behavior.
Well, I know he's upset because
the voters didn't choose him,
but what does that prove?
It proves the system works.
I don't know how much
more of this I can take.
What is it, Marcy?
The Governor.
I know what you
mean. He's overworked.
Well, he's taking
it all out on me.
He's finding fault
with everything I do.
What are you doing? Nothing.
Well, I'd be upset, too.
Hang in there, Marcy.
It won't last much longer.
I know, he has been
the same with me, too.
GOVERNOR: (SHOUTING)
Benson. Your turn.
Benson, what is this? Tuesday.
No, I mean this.
Would you explain this to me?
Well, what is it you
don't understand, sir?
Any of it. It looks like
a letter of resignation.
Yes, sir. I'm resigning.
Benson, you can't.
He can. He can.
Benson, I think you
owe me an explanation.
Well, Governor,
you heard Taylor.
If I stay, he won't come back.
Now let me get this straight.
Go ahead, I'll wait.
You're leaving,
because by leaving
you think Taylor will come
back because you aren't here
and I need him to run the state
more than I need you to run this house?
In a nutshell.
Benson, don't do this.
Leave him alone,
he's doing just fine.
No, but you're suggesting
that I can't run this
government without Taylor.
No, sir...
I will have you know
that this state is running
just as effectively
and just as efficiently
as the day Taylor left.
Governor, when's the last time
you had a good night's sleep?
In the service, when
I was on guard duty.
There, you see?
Running the state by yourself
is running you into the ground.
Oh, Benson, I can
get by without Taylor.
He just handled the
political side of my life.
You run my home.
Without the security of knowing that
you're here, I couldn't get anything done.
I feel very strongly about this.
I hate to say this, Benson.
If you ever try to quit on me
again, I'm gonna have to fire you!
(KNOCK ON DOOR)
Come in.
Hello, Taylor.
What are you doing here, Benson?
Waiting for you.
I ought to give you
a piece of my mind.
Sure you can spare it?
I have no time to
socialize, Benson.
I have a meeting with
the Governor at 3:00.
He's not coming.
I'm the one who
had Marcy call you.
You?
You have a lot of nerve, Benson.
Impersonating a governor
is a crime in this state.
I know, but he's gotten
away with it so far.
Taylor, come back.
Let's put our personal
differences aside.
The Governor needs
you, your job is here.
Nothing's changed.
Nothing has changed?
Benson, to be in politics,
people have to respect you.
Nobody voted for me.
I can't come back to this job.
There is not one
person in this house
that respects me.
People don't lose respect
for a man when he's down.
They lose it when
he refuses to get up.
And there is a
personality problem
here in the mansion, Benson,
in case you haven't noticed.
Everybody seems to dislike me.
I wouldn't say
everybody dislikes you.
Everybody likes me?
"Like" is a pretty strong word.
But you don't like me.
Yes, I don't like you.
Oh, well, there, you see?
Until now, I didn't hate you.
Oh, so now you hate me?
I hate what you're doing
to somebody I care about.
And there's nothing I can do
about it, except do what I'm doing.
Asking you to come back.
The Governor wants
me to come back, huh?
Yes, the Governor
wants you to come back.
He really wants me to come back?
What do you want,
a singing telegram?
And what about Marcy?
Does Marcy want me to come back?
(SIGHING)
Oh, Taylor, come back.
Thank you.
And what about Kraus?
What about Kraus?
You're right.
Well?
All right, I'm back.
Good, get to work!
You know, these last few weeks
have been very
difficult for me, Benson.
But now I...
I feel that somehow I've...
I've gained something.
Well, maybe you've
gained a little humility.
Exactly.
And now that I have
humility, I have everything.
Benson, some day I'll
be sitting in this chair.
If you do, you'll be
sitting in somebody's lap.
Now, remember,
when you bait the hook,
you have to make sure the
worm is on there real good.
Maybe I'll just watch.
Katie, run upstairs and
change, honey, so we can go.
Okay, but I'm not
touching any worms.
Well, how's the
picnic lunch coming?
Anything you catch, you clean.
Benson, I haven't
felt this good in weeks.
Neither have I.
Well, that's what I thought.
So why do you want to leave now?
I don't.
But this letter of resignation
was on my desk this morning.
Let me see that.
Well, this is my old letter.
Somebody taped it together.
Who would do that?
I thought it was worth a shot.
NARRATOR: Benson is videotaped
before a studio audience.
(DOG BARKING)
(EXCLAIMING)
What was that?
Almost two points.
Pick that up.
Pardon me, Kraus, I
have trouble with my ears.
I hear everything you say.
Good, then why don't you pick
that up and put it in the basket?
Why don't you get on that
broom and fly out of here?
Good morning.
What's going on, Benson?
My aim is poor and so
is Kraus's personality.
Is this the problem?
There.
Can we be friends?
What and ruin a
beautiful relationship?
You know, Benson,
personally I feel that
you and I can develop
a long and
meaningful association.
Oh, really?
Can we do it by phone?
Oh, that is funny. I like that.
So, what's this
lottery for anyway?
Fresh air fund. Mmm-hmm.
If you win first
prize, you get a car.
Then you can sell the
car and buy gas for it.
I already have a car, honey.
Second prize is
a trip to Hawaii.
I've been to Hawaii.
I laid my towel on the beach
and went for a swim.
When I came back,
they'd built a
condominium on it.
I will buy the whole book.
It's $10.
Well, it's a very worthy cause.
Now, just think of it, Katie.
What would we
have without fresh air?
Gills.
God, you're funny.
What's with him?
He's being awfully nice today.
He must want something from us.
Whatever it is, he
ain't getting it from me.
Good morning, everybody.
ALL: Morning, Governor.
Would you like a cup of coffee?
Yes, thank you.
Goodness gracious, sakes alive.
Governor, watch your language.
There are ladies present.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I can't help it.
It's that Representative Hofer.
That old fogey has
done it to me again.
First, he blocked my reform
legislation in committee.
Then he led the fight against
my Environmental Protection Act.
Now this. What's he done?
He died.
Will the man stop at nothing?
Well, I have to call a
special election to fill his seat
and guess who's going to run?
ALL: Taylor.
He told you?
In so many strokes.
Well, I know this must
be a terrible shock to you.
Words fail me.
Me, too. He's such a help
to me in so many ways.
What'll I do without him?
Better.
Taylor had a way of... of
making the most difficult issues
acceptable to the public.
I don't know how he did it.
He lied.
And in respect to
the financial
indebtedness of this project,
additional monies can be
allocated from the general fund
pursuant to the instructions received
from the state comptroller's office
and additional taxation
will not be required.
What do you have so far?
Writer's cramp.
Governor, you're going twice
as fast as you normally do.
Well, I have twice as
much work as I normally do.
Have you received the
reply from Senator Douglas?
I haven't even typed
up the request. Why not?
You just dictated it.
(KNOCK ON DOOR)
Come in.
Hi, Governor.
I found the notes from your dinner
meeting with Councilman Van Platt.
Oh, you're a lifesaver.
Where were they?
Now the proposal was written
on the back of this coaster
which I found in the left
pocket of your grey suit.
The counterproposal was
written on the back of this napkin
which I found in the left-hand
pocket of your raincoat.
Now this is a
pocket-size notebook,
a present from me.
Thank you, Benson. Benson. Huh?
I've got a problem.
What is it? Taylor.
He's coming back.
No.
Then what's the problem?
Oh, well, it's not
actually a problem.
Well, see, the problem...
Taylor's coming over today
for the Governor's
endorsement in this election.
Now, the Governor doesn't feel
he can endorse any one
candidate until after the primary.
That's the problem.
Good afternoon, everybody.
Taylor, come in. How's
the campaign going?
Ah, it just couldn't
be better. Good.
But I'm going to need a little help
from each and every one of you.
Sorry, I left my wallet
in my other pants.
Taylor, it isn't easy
for me to say this...
Uh, in all fairness, sir,
I think I should tell you,
I'm taking Marcy with me as
my administrative assistant.
Your what?
Congratulations.
It's a big step up for her.
Taylor, could I say
something about this?
I can handle this, Marcy.
And based on your record, sir,
I know you wouldn't want to stand in
the way of a woman's advancement.
How about a woman's consent?
Taylor, you and I never even
discussed my going to work for you.
Fine, Marcy, you want to
stand on formality, you've got it.
Would you like to
come to work for me?
No.
I'm perfectly happy
where I am. Thank you.
Okay, fine, I can accept that.
Loser.
Taylor, about my
endorsement of you,
I've given this
a lot of thought.
Yes, well, so have I, sir,
and, frankly, your popularity
in this particular district, it's...
It's virtually non-existent,
to put it kindly,
and your endorsement
could hurt me.
Then by all means,
give it to him.
You mean you don't
want my endorsement?
Oh, no, absolutely not.
Oh, this was easier
than I thought.
Governor, you're
due at the capitol
and I've got two hours'
worth of typing to do.
Oh, we've got to
get those letters out.
Listen, if it would help any,
I'll just sign the
bottom of the page
and you can type down to there.
And if there's any left over,
I'll just make it a P.S.
See you, Taylor.
Benson, my friend,
I would like you to be a
spokesman for my campaign.
Oh, really?
Yes, it is an opportunity for
you to show some leadership.
I see. To influence people.
Mmm-hmm.
And would these people
happen to be black?
Well, now that you mention it,
almost 20% of the district
is of the black persuasion.
Persuasion.
Well, yes.
Well, actually, what I meant
to say was black, um, um...
People?
Black people.
Black people.
I like that. I'm
going to use it.
I like that. I'm
going to use it.
You want me to think
that isn't the old maid
because it looks
like it is the old maid.
Pick, pick.
(SCREAMS)
It is the old maid.
Never use reverse
psychology on anyone under 10.
I'll remember that,
Minnesota Shrimp.
Good night, Benson.
Good night, sugar.
Governor. What now?
Hello.
Oh, right. Hello.
Getting your own coffee now?
Well, why not? I've got to do
everything else for myself now.
Well, you don't have to.
Find somebody to replace Taylor.
Well, the party actually
recommended somebody,
but he was indicted yesterday.
Sir, take a breather.
Oh, I don't have time.
Then take a breath.
Here, have a seat.
Oh, that feels good.
Why are you doing this?
You just told me to.
No, I mean, why are you
rushing around like this?
Are you gonna just
do it until you drop?
Could I answer that
with a little story?
I'd prefer a yes or no.
One summer vacation,
I took a job that
nobody else wanted.
I worked in an amusement
park pitch-ball concession.
Whenever the ball
would hit the bull's-eye,
Bloopo the clown fell
into a tank of water.
Bloopo the clown.
Mmm-hmm.
I was Bloopo.
Mmm-hmm.
You would be surprised
how many people throw well.
But no matter how many times
I was knocked into
that tank of water,
I always dragged
myself back up again.
Do you know why?
No, I can't imagine.
Because there was
no other Bloopo.
If I didn't do it, who would?
That is exactly the reason
I am working so hard today.
Well, if this job gets
to be too much for you,
you can always go back
to being Bloopo the clown.
Oh, I'm sure they have
somebody else by now.
Hello, Benson. How are you?
What are you doing here?
Oh, I was just in the
neighborhood and I, uh...
Have you made up your mind?
Yeah.
I can't help you, Taylor.
What?
Oh, I see.
You're going to support Davis.
I haven't decided.
But you're not gonna support me.
That I've decided.
Why not?
Well, because I've thought
about it and in my opinion
there are at least
two other people
who are better
qualified for the job.
(EXCLAIMING)
You drive a hard
bargain, Benson.
All right, what is
it that you want?
A clear conscience.
All right, all kidding aside,
with your help,
the black people's vote is mine.
Now, just think of it,
you could make the difference.
No, I can't.
No, you mean, you won't.
No, I mean, I can't.
I don't have any influence.
Why should people listen to me?
Maybe if you got Muhammad
Ali or somebody like that.
But you put me on the platform
and all you're going to get
is a big round of ho-hum.
Benson.
You've gotta help me.
I don't know any other blacks.
I mean, where I went to school
there were no blacks.
Look, these are just
a few small favors
and you will be repaid in time.
All right, maybe
this is a bit much,
but surely you'll appear with me
when I address the
N.A.A.C.P. chapter.
Well, for God's sakes, Benson,
you don't have to say anything.
All you have to do is stand
next to me, maybe give me a hug.
How does that sound?
Unpleasant.
Benson, it is not my fault
where I lived when I was a kid
there were no black people.
And what about now?
You're not a kid anymore.
Well, I... I...
Well, Taylor, for whatever it's
worth, you're the perfect politician.
Can I quote you on that?
Being a politician isn't enough.
In order to represent the people,
you've gotta be one of them.
What are you saying,
that I'm not a person?
In a word, yes.
All right, Benson.
You have had your opportunity
and you blew it.
I was gonna take you with me,
right up to the top,
but you have shown
yourself for what you are.
Selfish and rude
and not too bright.
Are you through?
No, but you are.
Benson, don't underestimate me.
Taylor, that isn't possible.
I'm calling from the
governor's office.
He'd like the results
as soon as possible.
Yes, I'll hold.
I hate to admit this, but I
have mixed feelings about this.
A secret part of me is
hoping that Taylor doesn't win.
I could really use
his help around here.
Here are the returns.
Yeah, what was that
figure for Harlan? Uh-huh.
Davidson?
Okay, Jacobs.
Yeah, got it. Now, go on.
Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Gee, your handwriting's
worse than mine.
That's shorthand.
Those are the final returns?
Okay, thank you.
How'd he do?
He lost.
He lost.
He came in sixth.
How could he?
There were only five candidates.
There was a large write-in
for "none of the above."
Well, I'm gonna get my coat.
I think we should all go over to
Taylor's campaign headquarters
and let him know that
he's still wanted back here.
Well, I don't think he's gonna
want to come back here, sir.
Well, of course he will.
He's a politician.
What else is he qualified to do?
He'd make a hell of a Bloopo.
I can't believe
that no one is here.
It's over, Kraus.
You can go now.
Oh, no, you hired me
to cater for three hours.
Forget it. Just go home.
Free food und still you
can't get anyone to come.
Hi, Taylor.
Oh, Miss Kraus. How
nice of you to be here.
He paid me to be here.
Hello, Taylor.
Well, I'm not surprised
to see you here, Benson.
Are you here to kick
me while I'm down?
No, I can wait till
you're feeling better.
We just wanted to
come and join your party.
Well, this is it.
Whoopee.
Everybody left when the votes
from the first precinct came in,
and I didn't have any.
Taylor, this is
your first time out.
Yeah, the people just didn't
get a chance to know you.
My grandmother
lives in that precinct.
Sir, I think we ought
to get out of here.
I think Taylor wants
to be left alone.
Oh, we can't leave
him now, Benson.
He'll get the idea
nobody likes him.
I think the cat's
out of the bag, sir.
I called up the newspapers
to give them my
concession speech.
They hung up on me.
I'd like to hear it.
So would I, Taylor.
I'll be in the car.
No, wait, he writes
wonderful speeches.
Friends, family,
loyal supporters,
and the morbidly curious.
The results are in and
the voters have spoken.
But what do they know?
The time has come to close ranks
and forget our differences.
Let us forget the hopes
that we had for the future.
We must abandon the dreams.
It was a small dream.
I wanted to be somebody
that people looked up to.
Oh, Taylor.
The time has come
(BLUBBERING) to give up.
Come on, Taylor, a lot of great
politicians lost their first election.
It's not the end of the world.
Believe it or not,
you've still got
a lot of people
who care about you
and you've got a great job, man.
Let's go home.
And it is all your fault.
If you had gotten behind
me, just gotten behind me,
it would have been a
whole different story.
Oh, Taylor, the black vote didn't
make the difference, you know that.
Your old job's waiting for
you. We want you back.
Sir, there is absolutely
no way in the world
that I would consider
coming back to work
as long as that man
is still in the house.
How could he say that?
There is no excuse
for that behavior.
Well, I know he's upset because
the voters didn't choose him,
but what does that prove?
It proves the system works.
I don't know how much
more of this I can take.
What is it, Marcy?
The Governor.
I know what you
mean. He's overworked.
Well, he's taking
it all out on me.
He's finding fault
with everything I do.
What are you doing? Nothing.
Well, I'd be upset, too.
Hang in there, Marcy.
It won't last much longer.
I know, he has been
the same with me, too.
GOVERNOR: (SHOUTING)
Benson. Your turn.
Benson, what is this? Tuesday.
No, I mean this.
Would you explain this to me?
Well, what is it you
don't understand, sir?
Any of it. It looks like
a letter of resignation.
Yes, sir. I'm resigning.
Benson, you can't.
He can. He can.
Benson, I think you
owe me an explanation.
Well, Governor,
you heard Taylor.
If I stay, he won't come back.
Now let me get this straight.
Go ahead, I'll wait.
You're leaving,
because by leaving
you think Taylor will come
back because you aren't here
and I need him to run the state
more than I need you to run this house?
In a nutshell.
Benson, don't do this.
Leave him alone,
he's doing just fine.
No, but you're suggesting
that I can't run this
government without Taylor.
No, sir...
I will have you know
that this state is running
just as effectively
and just as efficiently
as the day Taylor left.
Governor, when's the last time
you had a good night's sleep?
In the service, when
I was on guard duty.
There, you see?
Running the state by yourself
is running you into the ground.
Oh, Benson, I can
get by without Taylor.
He just handled the
political side of my life.
You run my home.
Without the security of knowing that
you're here, I couldn't get anything done.
I feel very strongly about this.
I hate to say this, Benson.
If you ever try to quit on me
again, I'm gonna have to fire you!
(KNOCK ON DOOR)
Come in.
Hello, Taylor.
What are you doing here, Benson?
Waiting for you.
I ought to give you
a piece of my mind.
Sure you can spare it?
I have no time to
socialize, Benson.
I have a meeting with
the Governor at 3:00.
He's not coming.
I'm the one who
had Marcy call you.
You?
You have a lot of nerve, Benson.
Impersonating a governor
is a crime in this state.
I know, but he's gotten
away with it so far.
Taylor, come back.
Let's put our personal
differences aside.
The Governor needs
you, your job is here.
Nothing's changed.
Nothing has changed?
Benson, to be in politics,
people have to respect you.
Nobody voted for me.
I can't come back to this job.
There is not one
person in this house
that respects me.
People don't lose respect
for a man when he's down.
They lose it when
he refuses to get up.
And there is a
personality problem
here in the mansion, Benson,
in case you haven't noticed.
Everybody seems to dislike me.
I wouldn't say
everybody dislikes you.
Everybody likes me?
"Like" is a pretty strong word.
But you don't like me.
Yes, I don't like you.
Oh, well, there, you see?
Until now, I didn't hate you.
Oh, so now you hate me?
I hate what you're doing
to somebody I care about.
And there's nothing I can do
about it, except do what I'm doing.
Asking you to come back.
The Governor wants
me to come back, huh?
Yes, the Governor
wants you to come back.
He really wants me to come back?
What do you want,
a singing telegram?
And what about Marcy?
Does Marcy want me to come back?
(SIGHING)
Oh, Taylor, come back.
Thank you.
And what about Kraus?
What about Kraus?
You're right.
Well?
All right, I'm back.
Good, get to work!
You know, these last few weeks
have been very
difficult for me, Benson.
But now I...
I feel that somehow I've...
I've gained something.
Well, maybe you've
gained a little humility.
Exactly.
And now that I have
humility, I have everything.
Benson, some day I'll
be sitting in this chair.
If you do, you'll be
sitting in somebody's lap.
Now, remember,
when you bait the hook,
you have to make sure the
worm is on there real good.
Maybe I'll just watch.
Katie, run upstairs and
change, honey, so we can go.
Okay, but I'm not
touching any worms.
Well, how's the
picnic lunch coming?
Anything you catch, you clean.
Benson, I haven't
felt this good in weeks.
Neither have I.
Well, that's what I thought.
So why do you want to leave now?
I don't.
But this letter of resignation
was on my desk this morning.
Let me see that.
Well, this is my old letter.
Somebody taped it together.
Who would do that?
I thought it was worth a shot.
NARRATOR: Benson is videotaped
before a studio audience.