Below Deck Mediterranean (2016–…): Season 7, Episode 1 - Episode #7.1 - full transcript

[cannon fires]


That goes off every day.

It gives me a heart attack.

This is my first time
ever in Malta.

This season for me,
it's a new place,

a new boat,
with new department heads.

- Oh!
- Oh, no!

You gotta manage
this deck, okay?

I don't wanna be the bosun.

Challenge accepted.

- Welcome.
- Hello, guys! Hi.

Our goal is to make this
your home away from home.


Déjà vu.

Oh, my God.

I want this uniform
to work, please.

Should we get naked first?

I was this ****ing
close to her vagina.

I was just, like, okay.

As a chief stew,
when sh... hits the fan,

the best thing to do
is feed them alcohol.

Happy birthday!

Is this my sister?
Is this my twin?

We're like twins, almost.

Bring me a naked man,
and bring him to me now.

- Oh, my God.
- Wow.

I love pressure,
thrive under pressure.

Absolutely love it.

Look what our deckhand brought.


We're gonna drink!

Where's Raygan?

She's dancing her butt off.

I am not openly looking
for a boat romance,

but Storm is looking
nice at this point.

I've never had flings
with guests before.

Kiss, kiss, kiss!

We're not!

Bullsh..., babe.

No, we're not dating.

What's going on here?

The chief stew and the chef
have to work well together.

It permeates through the boat.

- One second.
- No, don't touch me.

You're second stew,
I'm a second stew.

You are also responsible.

Three meters, getting close.

That is not three meters.

One meter... she's gonna hit it,

We're gonna hit, we're gonna

Oh sh...

Hit ahead, hit ahead.

I've never hit anything
in my career, ever.


I'm not driving with
you guys as a team.

It sounds like you
don't wanna be here.

That's literally
what I'm saying.

Look, I think you should go now.

She can deal with you.
Look at your attitude.

You've been abusing
me for so long,

and I've held it.

Okay. Well, I'm off.

Oh sh...

- All crew, all crew, hang on.
- [alarm blares]

Hold everything, hold... oh!

Are we crashing?
What's happening?

Oh! I twisted my ankle.

Oh sh...

Oh, my God,
we are so ****ed.

****ing hell!

Season 07 Episode 01

Episode Title: "Episode # 7.1"
Aired on: July 11, 2022.


Malta is a small country
off the coast of Sicily.

It has so many
different influences...

Arabic, Italian, Spanish.

It's a little piece
of paradise

that hasn't been discovered
by the super yacht industry.

Oh, my gosh, this boat.



The galley, the wheelhouse.

Hi, welcome.

Oh, my gosh, hello,
how are you?

I'm okay, good, how are you?

- I'm Natasha, nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you, welcome.

Oh, thank you.

I love that you have
a lot of experience.

Ah, oh, you've seen my CV.

Yeah, so you're good, like,

managing the personalities
and the meltdowns?


I've been in yachting
for almost 10 years now.

I'm definitely a lead
by example kinda girl.

That sounds super cringe.

So, these are your stews, okay?

You pick who's your second.

Since we have five men
and three women on the crew,

there will need to
be one coed bunk.

It's okay with management,
so we're good there.

So, we have female bosun.

Yeah, that's good.

- Well, thank you.
- Welcome.

Big boat. It's amazing.

I really should change.

So new.

I'll take this cabin.


- Hi!
- Hi, I'm Raygan.

Welcome aboard.

You know, honestly, it's always
nice to have women on deck.

- I think it's...
- I know.

Yeah. These are your deck crew.

It would have been great
to have Malia back,

but right now she's chief
officer on another vessel.

To be able to give
this opportunity to

the female on deck
is incredible,

because someone gave
me the opportunity.

So, I wanna be able
to extend that forward.

- Welcome aboard. Thank you.
- Thank you so much.


Ah, it's Dave.



Home sweet home.

- Ah!
- Oh, what the [bleep]!

All right!

- Are you all right?
- How you doing?

- Nice to see you.
- What's going on?

Did I scare you?

Yeah, I was so scared.

Just did a month charter
with Natasha.

We're good friends.

Pretty busy.


She's good at her job,
she's super cool.


How many bags did you have?

Just two.

Well, welcome.

See what there is around.

- Lovely.
- Hello?

It's so light!

I wanna stay here.

- Hi.
- Dave.

- Dave, nice to meet you.
- Pleasure.

- Welcome.
- Just bumped into Tash.

So, you guys worked together?

We just recently
worked together, yeah.

- Yeah, she sang your praise.
- Well, she's pretty good, too.

I've worked on yachts
for eight years.

I was a yacht chef
before I had

my own restaurant in
the southwest of France.

Super proud of it,
but it's super difficult

to make a success of it.

Hey, you're impressive,
with your gold medal.

I don't have it anymore.

I should have brought
it with me.


I won British ski championships
in freestyle skiing in 2014.

A little skydiving,
climbed Everest.

I've cheated death so
many times, it's a joke.

- Thank you so much.
- All right, welcome aboard.

- I'm looking for the bosun.
- Hi, I'm here.

- You're the bosun?
- Yeah, I am, yeah.

- Hi, Bosun.
- Hi there. What's your name?

-Jason, Jason. Hi, how are you?

I'm one of your deckhands.

Oh, great, you're nice
and tall, so that's good.

Yeah. So, I will go change
into this, I'm assuming?

Yeah, exactly, yeah, yeah.

So, just one of these two.

All right, I'll just go
with this one, then.

- Go for it.
- Quite spacious.

Oh, my God, I love your toes.

- Thanks, man.
- That's epic.


- Hi, how are you?
- Hi, I'm Tasha.

Natalya, nice to meet you.

I'm so excited.

Is this, like, my sister?
Is this my twin, like...

We're like twins,
almost, yeah.

- You ready?
- I'm ready. New season.

Oh sh...

- Welcome back to the Med.
- Thank you!


Holy sh...,
this thing is heavy.

Oh, the crew mess.

It's nice, hey?

I can't be looking this Goddamn
good and carry this big-ass bag.

How long you been doing this?

I've been yachting for,
like, over 12 years now.

Is that a Canadian accent?

Yeah, oh.

I was born in Essex, and
I moved from England

to Turkey when I was 12
because my parents

How long you been in Turkey?

I've been in Turkey
for 17 years.

Being in Turkey, I've calmed
down a little bit,

because, obviously,
it's a Muslim country.

- So, where are you from?
- Indiana.

Yeah, okay.

Two more left.

Damn, this is classy.

- Hello?
- What?

This is happening.
Hi... hey!

Hi, I'm Tasha, nice to meet you.

Damn, girl, like, one more look.

You look hell a...

- I'm so excited to be a stew.
- You look so good, yeah.

- Hi, Natalya.
- Hi, Natalya.

- Oh, fantastic.
- So, we're a team... dream team.

- Already happening.
- Yes.

Port aft.

- They're quite spacious.
- No, they're not bad, eh?

[phone ringing]

Hi, Mzi!

Hey, Captain Sandy, how are you?

It's so good to see your face.

You know, I saw a lot of
potential and growth in Mzi.

You got it, Mzi.

Nice work.
Anchor down.

To bring him back and
to watch him flourish

will be an
incredible feeling.

Thanks for referring
your friend Storm, too.

Okay, yeah.

So, talk to me,
what's going on?

Do you know what time tomorrow
you'll be released?


All right, you'll come
join us by tender.

- Yeah.
- Okay. Awesome. All right.

Well, that's a bummer.

- So, the cabin situation...
- Sure.

...there's an uneven amount
of guys and girls.

The chef, Dave, or
one of the deckhands,

would share a cabin
with one of us.

Yeah, why not?

I don't care who I share with.



- We're roomies?
- We're roomies.

I already know Dave,
we're really good mates.

So, rather that than share
with someone I don't know,

and then potentially not
get along with them.

And I feel like
it's easier now, hopefully.

It's cool.

[bleep] I don't know
what to say.

Oh, so you're sharing a cabin?


Or shared cabin experiences.

Oh, Kyle.

All crew, all crew, meet me in
the main salon for our welcome.

The cool thing about
motor yacht Home, it's a hybrid.

It's really futuristic looking.

Everything's white,
stainless, ultra-modern.

First boat like this
I've ever run.

Okay. Welcome, everyone.

We have two crew members that
are still in quarantine

until tomorrow,
probably around 9:00,

and it's gonna be challenging,

because the reality is we
pick up charter tomorrow.

And the turnaround time,
the provisioning,

the cleaning the vessel,

it's a disaster.

Coming up...

ing hell! Oh, my God.

Are we crashing?
What's happening?

We have two crew members
that are still in quarantine

until tomorrow,
probably around 9:00.

It's gonna be challenging,

because the reality is we pick
up charter tomorrow.

And provisioning,
the cleaning the vessel...

it's a disaster.

We have 24 hours.

There's teaks
that need cleaning,

there's chrome
that needs shining.

Not having two deckhands,

just being me and
Jason, this is bad.

I like to run a
boat where we help each other,

so I'm there for you.

I got a floor thing...
I don't wanna see dirty floors.

The deck is responsible
for the crew mess.

And, you know, we're adults.

I expect you to act like that.

So, hate comments...
I won't tolerate it.

Sexual harassment,
I will not tolerate it.

If you fall in love, that's
not sexual harassment, right?

So, now I wanted to introduce
our chief officer, Ray.

- Hi, Ray.
- And Carlos, the chief engineer.

- Hello, Carlos.
- Thank you so much.

- Thank you.
- Thank you.

It's been a while since I've
had all new department heads.

The chain that
is wrapped around the anchor,

I would have dropped that first.

I didn't like the way you're
speaking to everyone, you know?

I just give the guests
what they ask for

on their preference sheets.

What's that,
a resting bitch face?

Ooh, Adam.

How are they gonna
handle the pressure?

Can they lead?
It's critical.

You're in charge of lives,
you're in charge of hospitality.

There's no room for error.

Let's just get started,
then, shall we?

Can we have an interior meeting?

Sounds great.

So, just maybe a wipe-down?

Yeah. Be right back.


[lighter clicks]

I've worked on boats
right up until 107 meters.

I had 10 stews under me.

Me, in the past, I've worked
for people who'd be screaming,

swearing at me,

and I don't like to
be surrounded by negativity.

When my mum and dad got
divorced when I was six,

I felt like I was
a bit of a peacemaker.

So, it's important that I keep
feeling the happiness around.

I'd like to think I'm
an approachable person.

Jason, how you doing?

Obviously, I've seen your CVs.

To me, at the moment,
I don't think

there's any need for a rank,

because you're both
very experienced.

Yeah, honestly, I feel like
I do deserve my rank.


Going on four years
now of chief stew, so...

- So, what are your thoughts?
- ...we can be joint second.

So, that's where it is.

Ain't nobody winging
one bar here.

I'm a service queen
from the get-go.

So, extreme personality,
extreme service.

I have exactly 18 cousins that
I grew up with, you know?

I had to stand out, like,
hello, can you hear me?

And I think we
just rotate duties.

So maybe for this trip, Kyle,

do you wanna be on service
for this one, and do,

like, the late
shift, and then...

- Fantastic.
- Housekeeping, laundry?

You wanna be in housekeeping,
laundry, and then just

- chip in where you need?
- Yeah.

All crew, all crew.

- There it is.
- Sh...

You guys, you wanna
do, like, a train?

Oh, my God!


This is the most meat
I've ever handled.

Oh, boy.

Galley Tetris.

Ugh! Ah! Oh!

These are Sandy's.

Mega-yachts are a little
different than what I'm used to.

Yeah, like, up to 35 feet.

Most people's perception of me
without knowing me is incorrect.

Growing up in Indiana, I went to
Purdue in the middle of nowhere.

After college,
I got into commodity trading

for about 11 years.

After that company
got bought out,

I felt like a divorcee
and a new lease on life.

I sold all my stuff
and flew overseas.

I started painting my nails
probably a couple of years ago.

I grew my hair out on a bet.

It's ridiculous,
as you can see it.

But I'm one of the wild cards,
for sure.

Okay, so, I'm gonna
blade it all down.

Please fit.


Dave, Natasha, and Raygan,

meet me in the crew mess for our
first preference sheet meeting.


- Copy.
- Copy.

This is our first charter,
which is very exciting.

Billy Rodriguez is a
prestigious president

and cofounder of a Los Angeles
based advertising agency.

He and his fiancé and
co-primary, Chris Figueroa,

met in Japan and
will be celebrating

their anniversary
during their stay.


In addition to enjoying
a Japanese-themed evening,

these guests would also like to
invite a local drag performer...

- Oh, yes!
- Oh, that's pretty fun.

...for an all-out drag
night while on charter.

They expect to use all
available water toys.

Here's the bummer...
the slide's held up in customs,

so you will need to pull
out all stops on deck,

every available opportunity.

Lots of seafood,
lots of lobster.

Beets... "they taste like dirt."

Can't beet a root.

That's funny.

Our first charter
together, and...

- Yeah.
- ...hopefully, we kill it.

Since our crew members
are still in quarantine,

so I'm gonna have
Ray back there with you.

And then Carlos is gonna
be on the bow

to help us get off the dock.

Yeah, yeah, of course.

Getting off the dock,
being down two deckhands,

it's a safety issue.

These dolphins are
really close together.

They're steel, you wanna make
sure you don't hit them.

So, I have the chief officer

calling the distances because
deck needs that support.

- Thank you.
- Thank you.

Seeing as you guys
got the cabins,

you want me to go start on
all the foodie stuff?


Can I show you something?

Just go really fast.


Next cabin, here we go.

This actually is a workout,
like, spraying these bottles.

You are so disgusting,
but I like it.

I was recently just working in

the Kimberlys in Australia
as a sole stew.

It's very lonely.

You take on every single

service, laundry, nannying.

I was in the kitchen.

So, coming onto a
boat where there's,

like, eight crew, I'm, like,
super excited about it.

I'm going to bed.

Is that us finished another one?

The cabins are completely done.

We need to get to bed.

I'm losing my mind for real.

- Okay, bye.
- Love you guys.

You, too.

Shifting stuff around.

You'll be all right.

- Oh, my God.
- No, you're fine.

It's always gonna be that...
it's the first couple of days.

Tomorrow's another day, and
you get to some sleep today.

- We'll smash it out tomorrow.
- So hard.

You'll be all right.



Good night.


[alarm sounds]

[alarm sounds]


- Oh, Lord.
- Here you go.


Holy sh..., look at this galley.

He's incredible.

- Should we get started?
- I'm ready to go.

Oh my God!

Is this love?

Is this the start
of an early romance?

How long did
you work together for?

Just a month.

We were just, like...

We were like the
little Musketeers.

I've just been
through a break-up

right before
coming on this boat.

So, I'm focusing on me.

I'm not worrying
about someone else.

Let's just start carrying this
stuff out of the main salon.

Thanks for working so hard.

Oh, of course,
that's what we're here for.


Another delivery for you.

It looks light.

- What is it?
- I don't know.

It's a floating dock.

That goes under your


Okay, well [bleep].

I'll be back in two minutes.

I think all the door handles
are gonna need work as well.

Ah... oh.

Look at this kid,
all by himself.

Where's the bosun?

All right, I'm helping you.

You carried this by yourself?

- Yeah.
- Man, you're strong.

- Did you tuck?
- So, yeah.

What do you mean? It's all out.

- All jokes aside...
- Yeah.

...I came out last year, March.

No, you didn't!

Bible. I'm being serious.

In South Africa, it's not
really a popular thing,

to be homosexual, and especially
going to an all-boys' school.

I always had to hide away
who I was, being gay.

The longest relationship
I've had was 12 years.

It was always kept a secret,

and keeping that all
inside damaged me a lot.

But I'd like to make humor
out of a situation

that's uncomfortable,
and through that humor,

I attract people more
to my personality

and make them forget,
you know what,

don't look at him as the
gay guy in front of me.

I see a funny guy
in front of me.

So, I'm nearly 30, and
I really wanna have kids.

I really wanna get
married one day.

- Yeah.
- Obviously, no rush on that.

Do you want me to put
the condoms on your bed?

Safety first.

Is it an arrival cocktail?

It's a blue raspberry shot,
with a Jolly Rancher in it.

I've always been massive
into doing courses.

I've done language courses,
floristry, beauty, bar tending.

Learning how to flair.

I tried to do flair in a boat
and I dropped the bottle

on the floor and
it smashed everywhere.

So, ever since then,
I never attempt it on a boat.

Yeah, I've got
my blue vibe going on.

Quick, what are we doing?

We're gonna move the upstairs
provisions to a hallway.

We need to get these boxes
out of sight of the guests.

Guys, this is ****ing insane,
and I'm overwhelmed.

So it's a matter of the case
is where you find a hole,

fill it with something,
you know?

All crew, all crew,
in your whites.

Guest arrival at 12:00.

Time to get dressed.

Lord, have mercy on my soul.

So, if I walk through the boat
it's gonna be fine, right?

I'm hoping to God.

Okay, ready for the charter.

Good job.

All crew, all crew,
the guests are arriving.

Meet on the dock.

Lord, have mercy.

And then we need, like,
a little plate.


Shots, shots, shots.

- Hi, everyone.
- Welcome! Hi!

How are you, I'm your captain.

- Nice to meet you.
- Chris.

Welcome aboard.

Hi, I'm Raygan,
nice to meet you.

- That dress, I love it!
- Thank you!

Thank you, I'm Kyle,
nice to meet you.

Welcome to Motor Yacht Home.

Thank you.

So, our goal is to make it your
home and the best holiday ever.


We're gonna get off the dock and

we're gonna head out as soon
as we get your luggage on board.

Natasha is gonna
show you around the boat.

- Hello!
- Wonderful, thank you.

So, if we can invite you to
place your shoes in this basket.

Oh, sure.

Let's get the luggage.

We have some blue
Jolly Rancher shots here.


It's quite heavy.

Oh, mother... er.

Just to let you know.

- Cheers.
- Yes!

That was good.


I'm definitely
starting with that.

So, would you like
to commence the tour?


So, this is bridge deck aft,

where you'll probably
have most of your meals.

Can you grab this one?

Oh, my God.

We have the sundeck,

and the Jacuzzi.

This is what
I'm super excited about.

Lots of alcohol as well.

What are you trying to suggest?

Here, we have
the main salon.


There's one suitcase left.

I can't carry that,
it's too heavy.

****ing hell.

This is your team.

Like, you... like, help.

Oh, my ****ing God.

So, now we can go
and see the cabins.

Don't we need to jump on
the beds in your room, Billy?


Oh, those are gonna get
enough action already.


- Wait, is this the master?
- Yeah.

See, it's very luminous.

- Yes.
- I guess it'll do.

So, this is the VIP suite.

- Ooh!
- Oh.

And then the other cabins
are kind of very similar.

Captain, Captain, Raygan,
all luggage on board.

I'm getting the passerelle in.

Thank you. Nice work.

It's 1:15 at the moment.

Is there any particular time
you'd like to have lunch?

Three... 3:00.

You're gonna have a
fabulous Italian lunch.

- Yay!
- Thank you.

So, yeah.

Where's it going?


Ah, that wind.

We need to change into our polo.

We're ready to depart.

Destination is Amir bay.

You could let
go of the bowlines,

start freeing up
the stern lines.

- Natalya.
- Yes?

- Natasha.
- It's so confusing.

And you guys look alike.

You're gorgeous brunettes,
and Natalya and Natasha.

- We're like the twins.
- And, like...

- Yay!
-'s not fair.

All crew, all crew,
we have permission to depart.

Quick, quick, quick,
because we...

Oh, quick.

The stern lines are
ready to let go.

Okay, hold it there.

In this marina,
the current really

pushes the vessel to starboard.

Very good, very good.

Guys, we're off the dock.

And these dolphins,
unlike last season,

they don't pull them
apart for me.

They're really close together.

I mean, they're really
close together.

Raygan, just watch that
buoy on the port side.

It's coming down now,
eight meters and holding.

We can steer to port.

Eight meters and holding,
very good.

Amazing, thank you.

- Slow and easy wins the race.
- Yeah.

It's pretty cool,
coming though that.

Awesome, actually.


Why am I waiting in a line to
take a picture with my fiancé?

So, we're doing this
super starter,

bread, a few
different types.

I will follow
a preference sheet,

but I don't follow recipes.

If I'm creating, I know
that I need sour,

bitter, sweet,
texture, and earth.

I'm always
bouncing ideas myself,

and it's almost like just
throwing a ball against a wall.

It's like, right, can
I do this?

Catch it... yes, I can do that.

Can I do that?

No, I can't do it,
I've dropped it.

Just shut my eyes, and
I can envision the plate.

This one's empty, completely.

I guess I'll just wait for
everyone else to get theirs.

- I'm totally kidding.
- Sorry.

I mean, kinda serious.


Yeah, I would do it,
but I've been lifting

a little more
than everyone else.

I'll act like
you didn't say that.

They're amazing.

I've tried to bite my tongue
while I'm busting my butt.

I stand by my work ethic,

and it's just easier to just
take it on the chin, say "Copy."

Okay, so I'll meet you
in the crew mess.

All crew, all crew,
our ETA is 30 minutes.

Oh, hey, how cute.

Can we just look at the
birds' nests for a second?

Thank God we have Natasha.

Oh, I passed the hunger phase.

I like how you have
all the energy,

now that you're not
lifting the heavy stuff.

"I can't lift this bag,
it's too heavy."

Well, tough sh... lift it...
well, lift it.

Tough sh...
Tough sh..., lift it.

You'll figure it out.

There's only one of me.

Coming up...

There's cinnamon.

I'm, like, certain...

The primary would like to
see his preference sheet.


He's had one drink too many.

All crew, our ETA to our
destination is 20 minutes.


How are you looking on time?

Yeah, I'm ready.

RPMs, 1600.

So, we have the family-style
buffet of Italian food.

Yay! Ooh.

Could I offer
the wine list for anyone?

- I'm okay.
- Okay.

Set the anchor at the waterline.


Anchor is on waterline.

Go to three shackles.

Oh [bleep].

Okay, great.
Do your thing, girl.

Should I go with two?

Yeah, you can take these two.

Looks beautiful.

You look beautiful.


I knew there was
a romance going on.

Love is in the air.

No, you look beautiful, too.

Hot soup, coming through.

You look super.

- Ladies first.
- Yum!


Thank you.

Natalya, start working around
the cabins, unpacking.

Copy that.

Oh, this is really good.

Is it delicious, babe?

- It's delicious.
- It's very good.



- It's very peppery.
- Bless you.

- Beautiful.
- Hey.

The cheese is good.


We have the grilled octopus.

Oh, my goodness, look at that.

Raygan, Raygan,
you're gonna need

to put the toys in the water.

Get the toys ready, she said.


One of the things I think
the crew will find difficult

is all the water toys being
in the hull of the boat.

Everything's done on the bow.

Just grab all what you can
and bring it to the aft.

The guests don't have to see
the behind-the-scenes work.

Just like at a resort,

they step outside,
there's all the water toys.

It's magic.


I really like
the mozzarella.

How do you eat seafood
without, like, lemon?

That looks absolutely beautiful.

And then I've got
some sea bass...

Holy sh..., all right. well, and some Linguini.


Okay, we have 12-hour-braised
beef cheeks.


All right [bleep]
I'm running out of room.

This is so good.

- Mm.
- It is so good.

There's cinnamon.

I'm, like, 137 percent certain

I put no cinnamon on
my preference sheet.

Are there any of this
without cinnamon?

Well, I can go enquire for you.

Okay. It's like my
kryptonite, yeah.

Good to know. There's some
things I need to know.

Well, it was on
the preference sheet, so.

These are things I need to know

next time I read
the preference sheet.

I'm sorry, I'm the bearer
of bad news.

Oh, God.

He's just asking do we have any
of the beef without cinnamon in.

- Yes.
- Okay.

When have you ever cooked
beef with cinnamon?

Since when do people
don't like cinnamon?

That's all guests' luggage
packed into their cabins.

Can you please pass me
primary's preference sheet?

So, here we have the arrabbiata.

This is a lot of food
for eight people.


Primary would like to
see his preference sheet.


I just wanna make sure
I didn't say no cinnamon.

On dietary restrictions,
you've got none here,

but is that no cinnamon?

Oh, I can't believe
I did not put that there.

Cinnamon... I can never spell
that... cinnaminaminaminum.

Synonym... cinna-synonym...

I... I cannot pronounce
the word "cinnanym."

I also can't say "ambulance."

Ambulance, ambulance,
abliance. Ambliance.

I've always said "ambliance."

Cinnanynom... see,
I can't. I can't.

Okay. Cinnamon-free.

They are very picky, yes.

The first lunch is
super important.

- The cinnamon-free?
- Yes, yes, yes.

- Yeah?
- Here, right here.

There's no bloody ground
cinnamon on the beef cheek,

it's just cinnamon sticks.

It's like an aromatic flavor.

You can't please everyone,

but I don't wanna fail, so...

If you don't like it,
I'm gonna keep going

until you do like it,

I think it was cooked in the
same thing with the cinnamon.


God, everything's
just crazy, I swear.

I feel like we should be
in the water.

We should all switch
into our swimwear.

- Is it soft?
- Oh, it's beautiful.

- Yeah?
- Uh-huh.

Holy sh...

Don't forget to try
the [bleep] bro.



My foot is stuck.

You know what,
why don't you go

talk to the guests and
see what they wanna do.

Can we play in the water today,
or is that not a thing?

What do they want to do?

Do you have the things that you
can, like, hold onto, and

- Seabob?
- Yeah, that.

No, that sounds like
way too much exercise.

Dude ****ing hell.

I want, like,
Sea-Doos or something.


Like, the little jet-ski things.

It's a big, massive jet-ski.

Do you think so?

Yeah, yeah, so, I'll just...

Okay, no problem.

She looked a
little apprehensive.

Who, her?

Yeah, a little.

No, she's always,
like, make sure.

I don't know,
I'm not sure she's my favorite.


We have to ride on the jet-ski
to go to the aft, yeah?


- Yeah.
- Really?

All right, I'll go change.

- Are you okay?
- Raygan is my enemy now.

I asked a simple question...


...and she's kinda,
like, stink-face.

Like, I don't need
stink-face, I just...

The charter guest has had,

one two drink,
five too many at this point.

He's gonna be
over dramatic about things,

but at the end of the day,
he's the charter guest.

I'm irritated with her.

Like, don't be unreasonable.

It must be very hard to get out.

Oh, it's too much,
nyah, nyah, nyah.

Rightfully so, right?

Yeah. Yeah, of course.

- Who's the bosun?
- Raygan.

That's it, yeah.

You're gonna be a stupid bitch
about it, I'm gonna show you.

Treat me like
I'm ****ing stupid.

Coming up...

I believe our deckhands
are arriving.

- Woohoo!
- Captain Sandy.

- Good to see you.
- How are you?

And later...

So, how long have you and
Chef been seeing each other?

I'm not seeing the chef.

There's nothing in the water.

Like, you're gonna
be a stupid bitch about it,

I'm gonna show you.

The guest is a bit impatient.


I'll go see him.

- Yeah. Yeah, of course.
- Yeah.

Treat me like
I'm ****ing stupid.

That's not fun.

So, you push the red
button to get on.

Hi, what's happening back here?

I... I'm a little
irritated with Raygan.

I know that I'm sounding
like a drama queen.

No, you're not.

I'm not trying to be
a drama queen.

You're not. You...

I have... I... on
our preference sheet it says,

"slide out at all times."

Can you show me
where the slide is?

I know. We don't have one.

Our slide is held in customs.

Oh. Well, there's that.
So, fine.

So, then, like, make up for it.

Listen, I would be
complaining, too.

I would be pissed.

We left the dock
without two crew members,

so the deck team is
really struggling.

I'm, like,
a customer service guy.

It's not that she's rude;
She's not warm and fuzzy.

I'm just, like...

Yeah, I am really sorry,

and you have every right
to sit here and tell me that.

I'll take care of it.

We're launching
the WaveRunners now.

But drinking and
WaveRunnering can't happen.

My crew can take you.

I'm ready with this.

You know, when I have a
client complaint, I shoulder it.

But my biggest concern
right now with Raygan is just

keep them occupied,
get the toys out.

So, you're gonna
take the guests,

because they can't ride
them on their own,

they've been drinking.

Knowing that they're
down two people,

we have to work
with what we have.

But that has to be communicated
and not blindside the client.

I'm gonna get changed.

Oh. No.

Oh, yeah? Why?

Sandy, you are a hands-on...

You know, and this
is how I started.


Oh, yeah, I just didn't
start driving a boat.

Kyle, I'm gonna have to love
and leave you,

because they want me to take
all of their, like,

two bags of laundry, then they
want me to press their outfits

for tonight, and then I've gotta
go do and unpack the master.


How you feeling, Dave?

The thought knowing that
I'm not gonna catch up

this whole trip is annoying
me a little bit.

Yeah, same.

It's a tough adjustment,
going from a bigger boat

to a smaller boat, just
because my job is to delegate.

So, to just go down
to two stews,

your job role slightly changes.

People say if you don't
laugh, you cry, right? But...

Start trying to help each other.


- We good to go?
- Yeah. You'll go with me?

- I suppose.
- Yeah.


So much clothing,
so little time.

That looks like so much fun!

Chris is with Raygan.

Billy hates Raygan, so it's
good they're not together.

Yeah. Exactly.

Do you want me to go and
start your menu again?

No, let's do French.

I'm like a dolphin.

A majestic one, too.

What time are we doing dinner?

You're a very good French chef.

Ah, merci.

The primary didn't really care
for lunch.

They were very particular
on the exact...

on everything they wanted.

Dinner is 9:00, 9:30.


It's not like I have
all day to prep,

and then on top of that I put
so much pressure on myself.

I mean, my mom and dad
didn't have any money,

so at the age of 13,
I just worked as much

as I could, washing pots
at a busy restaurant,

sweeping the floors,
all the sh... jobs.

The pressure is
high on this dinner.

I am afraid to fail.

Buffet for main or
just do all plated?

Well, let's do plated
and see what happens.

- Jason, you're the best.
- Ooh!

We've gotta set for
dinner and everything.

We need, like,
a few smaller ones.

The centerpiece was
not very grand today.

Two hours till dinner.



Okay, I'm here to help.

We get our deckhands tonight.

You gotta hold it
tight with two hands...

Yeah, yeah. it stops swinging.
Good job.

So, is all your stuff ready
for me to grab for pressing?

Yeah, it's just on one bed.

- Thank you.
- No problem, thank you.


Jesus Christ.

Think of the tip, just the tip.

Here's a delivery.

You wanna go rest until 12:00?

I can go help them, depending on
what time my anchor watch is.

I can do your 2:00,
so you'll get sleep,

which you do need, yeah?

- I'll just do the first one.
- Yeah.

Hi, friend.

Am I the only person
wearing a suit tonight?

- You are.
- You guys are trash.

How's it going?

They're coming.


That's mainly what
I'm concerned about, too.

Are we ready?

You're more than welcome
to move up.


Tash, Tash, we have the
guests sitting at the table.

Oh, it smells so good.

What's going on
with the provisioning.

It's just so disorganized.

Hey, Siri, change the
lights to not this.

- Thank you so much.
- You're welcome.

****ing good.

Tash, Tash, Dave,
make your way to the galley.

We need to run the food out.

- Yeah, of course.
- Let's go.

- Are you ready?
- Yeah.

Hey, guys, we're ready to go.

Oh, my God, I just wanna
jump in this bed.


Thank you.

So, here we have your
Wagyu beef steak,

served with wild mushrooms and
mashed potatoes... enjoy.

- Thank you, love.
- This is delicious.


It's cooked perfectly,
it's good.


So, it's a little more rare.

If we can just cook it just
a little bit more, thank you.

All right, yeah, gotcha.

I can't believe
I had to send that back.

Everything's perfect,
it's just Billy.

He's just asking if we can
go a tiny bit more

on the medium side.

Sorry, bud.

This is perfectly cooked.

It's Wagyu beef.

You could eat it raw.

Yeah, this is just ridiculous.

Oh [bleep].

Coming up...


All crew, all crew, hang on.

Are we crashing?
What's happening?

I think those are our deckhands.

I believe our deckhands
are arriving.

I cannot believe it.

Billy, did you already
finish yours?

Why don't you have a plate?

I had a plate,
and it was not medium.

Couldn't have been
better timing.

I take that back...

better timing would
have been yesterday.

Thank you.

- Yay!
- Hey, I know.

I'm so happy.

Thank you so much.

You are most welcome.

You wanna throw me the line?

- Mm. It is good, though.
- Whew.

Hello, it's so good to meet you.

Storm, welcome.

So stoked to finally be here.

Yeah, we're...
I'm really happy.

Hello, Captain Sandy.

- Hey, so good to see you.
- How are you?

- I'm so happy to have you back.
- Yeah, sorry we're late.

Literally feels like
breaking out of prison,

getting out of quarantine.

Since I worked on
Lady Michelle last year,

because of the pandemic,
it's just been such a struggle,

because South Africa's been

literally on every
country's red list.

So, I think I'm gonna have
to step it up

and hit it hard from
the ground, running,

just because it would seem
like we've just been chilling

in quarantine, but
quarantine ain't easy, either,

I can tell you
that much for free.

- This is Storm.
- Hey, dude.

- Storm.
- Pleasure to meet you.

- Mzi.
- Hi.

- Hi, I'm Raygan.
- Nice to meet you.

You like some more wine?

I'm good right now, thank you.


I'm gonna show you
what you're doing.

- Oh, yes, ma'am.
- Because he's on till midnight.

Oh, yes, of course.

So, I can tell Mzi, and
Mzi can relate it to you.

- Yeah.
- You wanna come with me?

Yeah, I'll do that. Okay.

This is your job tonight.

I really need this sorted,
because it's a safety issue.

Got it, thank you.



I can't hear you
through my placemat.

I've been sailing for
the past four years.

I'm a dirt bag pirate, basically.

Some people don't enjoy me,
but that's okay.

I think if everyone likes you,
you're doing something wrong.

Okay, well, I'll go
ahead and get changed.

I don't wear underpants, though.

I can't do with the door open.

- Oh, look, dessert.
- Ooh!


Thank you.

We've got a medley of
wild fruits,

hot chocolate fondue,
with vegan banana parfait.

- Thank you so much.
- Enjoy.

Now I'm done.

- It's very good.
- It's delicious.

It's really good.

Hi. I'm Natalya.

Sorry, I'm, like, a sweaty mess,

trying to get used
to everyone... Storm.

- Storm, nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you, yeah.

Oh, Storm is pretty fit.

So many new faces.

Okay, okay.

Kyle, drag queen I think's
about five minutes out.

So, we need to make it
a bit more of a vibe.

She's gonna do my face for fun.

- Quickly?
- Yeah.

Shall I come out dressed
as a man, then?

- One hundred percent.
- Okay.


Dave, am I all right to get
into some of your clothes?

Take what you want,
just take anything.


I'm just gonna make space
in the forepeak,

so we've got rubbish on one side
and provisions on another.

- It's only 11:00.
- Party, partying.

Make it filthy, bitch.

Today, we're using the
412 blend brush 77.

[bleep] me, brü.

Such a mess down there.

So, myself and Storm,
we've been childhood friends.

We used to play water polo
against each other.

Mzi is my ****ing homie.

When I was 13, Storm looked
like an 18-year-old man,

and we were petrified of him,

he just had hair everywhere.

Obviously, our team
...ed his team up.

That same moustache he has
today, he's had since he was 13.

Got you.

- Damn!
- Boom, boom.

The drag queen is here.

I'm not gonna lie, I would
actually sit on your face.


My strong point
is theme parties.

My grandma would treat me and my
sister to trips to the theater,

and it just felt, like,
electric for me.

And to be able
to entertain guests

and make other people feel that
way is how I felt as a child

it's just magic.

Yay! Woo! Yes! Oh, my God!

Do you guys wanna
meet my best friend?

- Holy sh...
- Follow me!

- What is happening?
- I love this!



Work it, girl, work it!

Oh, my God!

Ah, ah, ah... oh, my God.


Woo! Jesus!

All right, bitch.

- Woohoo!
- Work it! Work!


That's amazing.
You're incredible.

Thank the Lord we could pull
tonight together.

Yeah! I love this!

I'm happy, like,
if they're happy.

Everyone say, "Drag queen!"

Drag queen!


This should be good.

- Mwah.
- Thank you.

Goodbye, thank you.


Holy sh...!

Do you want me to work 12:00
to 4:00 anchor watch?


You're gonna get
on deck for 7:00.


- See you tomorrow.
- Hasta la mañana.

- Night, guys.
- Good night.

All right, good night.

Good night, hon.

- Good night, Ryan.
- Good night.

So, how long have you and
Chef been seeing each other?

- I'm not seeing the chef.
- Bullsh..., babes.

You guys have this
beautiful connection.

We're not!

You're literally
smiling ear-to-ear.

Well, I don't... no, we're
not seeing each other.


I've had two very long-term
relationships on previous boats.

It was nice, because to share
your cabin with your partner,

you can really
blow off some steam,

and you can trust them not
to say anything to anyone.

If I saw him in a pub, I would
literally eat any meal he makes.

You know what I mean?

Oh! Including him.

He is the meal.

I don't like being single.

I get really lonely easily.

I know, I shouldn't
think like that.


Okay, I'm going.

Thanks so much for a great day.

Okay, cool.


Let's do this.

Wow, we will have a swell.

Good morning.

Okay, we're just finishing
the main deck,

just wiping the sides
and the deck.



- Morning.
- Want a coffee?

- I've got one over there.
- Oh.

- Good morning, everyone.
- Good morning.

Where's my anchor
watch schedule?

Every bosun has
a watch schedule.

This should have been
done on day one.

Raygan, Raygan, to the bridge.


I'm expected to see
your watch schedule

so I can approve
it to make sure

that I'm comfortable with
who you have on bridge watch.

So, where's your schedule?


For people's, like, where...
I need that, they need that.

Yeah, yeah, I'm gonna write it.

Getting up this morning,
and Mzi's getting up at 10:00.

We're gonna have break,

and have a talk then, so
I'll write it all down on break.

No, you need to do
that this morning.

Also, the tender should have
been in the water already.


The tender we're gonna drive...

I was just clean up just
quickly, doing the main deck.

We're just finishing
that quickly.

No, no, no,
you have two deckhands.

Toys, toys, toys.

- Yeah.
- It's a priority.


Tender, WaveRunners,
in the water.


My last boat that was in Italy,
it was a private as well,

so they're not
being so demanding,

so they've been quite relaxed.

So, this is the most
demanding charter experience

I've had in a long time.

- Tender in the water.
- Okay.

Before we leave.
And then your schedule.

Yeah, no problem.

I think they'll like that.

It looks nice.

We're gonna put
the tender in the water.

All right.

Carlos, Carlos, Raygan.

Yeah, go ahead for Carlos.

Yeah, I'm gonna need your help
for the tender, please.

Special with sausage.

- Yes, please. Thank you.
- You're welcome.

Do you like what you see?
You like these jugs?


Okay, so the bow's gonna
go towards the aft.

Jason, do you hear me?


Keep it tight.

- No, it's going...
- Not too tight.

You said it's going
to the ****ing aft.

I got it, just let it
swing around.

- Right, it's like...
- Huh?

...quit telling me to...
you can't...

Can you hold it tightly, Jason?


Hold it tight towards the boat.

- Okay, can I go?
- Okay, go now.

Yeah, have a little drive around

and see what the steering and
everything is like.


I'm gonna change.

Are they ready for us
in the water?

We're ready for the water.

Good morning, sweetheart.


Just let you know...



- Kyle?
- Hello, there.

Are you able to nip up
to bridge deck aft

and just get the table clear?

- Yeah.
- Thanks, hon.

I need every toy in the water.

They're burning up, they're
ready to get in the water.

Cool, cool, cool.

We just lost our stabilizers.

All crew, all crew,

we have some malfunctioning
of our stabilizers.

Oh sh...

Ah... I'm gonna fall.

- The boat's rocking!
- Are we crashing?

- What's happening?
- ... ****ing hell!

Oh, my God.

All crew, all crew, hang on.

Hold everything!

All crew, all crew, hang on.




Where are the life jackets?

- Oh, my God, oh, my God.
- Oh my God.