Below Deck Mediterranean (2016–…): Season 4, Episode 6 - Knot Today, Anchors - full transcript

With Anastasia filling the role as Temp Chef and Lead Deckhand Travis helping as her sous chef, the exhausted crew continues to work a person down in each department. Teenage ...

- Previously on
"below deck med"...

I was just like "lovely".

[ laughs ]

- I need a chef
with more experience,

so I have to let you go.

Do you think you could
fill in as chef?

- I would be more than
happy to step up.

- I've heard someone in
the deck crew cooks.

- Thank you for your help
in the galley.

- Everybody realizes now
how ----ed we are.

- I'm so scared.

- Daniel and sheree funsch

and their 17-year-old daughter
who is a recording artist.

- Daniel and sheree would
like a rap party dinner.

- These are good to go.
- It's so good.

- Amazing.
- You're killing it, dude.

- I wish it was a chef killing
it and not my third stew.

- You know what you're doing.

I would like to head
across the bay.

I'm gonna move the vessel

because the client's
making a music video

and the backdrop is great
across the harbor.

- I'm so tired.
We're all working our asses off.

It's just too much.

- Captain, some of the anchor
is on deck.

Oh, [bleep].

- Holy sh--.
Can you not see that?

- Oh, my god.
What did you--

can you not see that from...

- No, I can't.
- Look.

You bent this whole thing.

- Oh, [bleep].

- Yeah.

Hey, joao, come back.
We have a situation.

- Copy.

- I can't believe
I just did that.

- Don't know what's happening,
but it's a bit tense.

And I'm glad I'm not
the one who's causing it.

- Come on.

- What are you doing there?

- Chopping
french fries for lunch.

- Yum.

We've lost travis and
anastasia to the galley.

So now I'm the one
down in the cabins

where anastasia should be.

It's like opposite day
for grownups.

- Do you have iced tea?

- Yeah.
- Perfect.

- You wanna hand me your lines?

- Yeah.

- What's happening,

- Straight ----ed.
- Okay.

Oh, jesus.

- This is a huge problem.

Colin? What was going
through his brain?

Seriously, he should know
by now.

It's the second season.

- Travis, travis, travis...
- What's happening?

I can help
you make lunch.

- Thank you.

- Oh, my gosh.
Thank you so much.

- You're welcome.

- Get the remote.
Slowly let it out that way.


Let's put it on slow
speed there, bud.

Otherwise, I might lose
my fingers and the rest of me.

You're dealing
with a 500 kg anchor

and a 500 kg chain.

Ready? Stop.
Okay, go.

That chain starts going
and it rushes down.

Picks up too much speed,
you lose your legs.

Now go one small one.
- Watch your hands.

- Stop, stop!
You go slowly?

- Yep, yep.

Okay, stop.

- You got a bigger glass.

- She makes a
great bloody mary.

- Do you want anything
for breakfast, aesha?

- Oh, my god, are you serious?

Oh, you make
my fanny tingle.

[ laughs ]

- ? lamour ?

- you have a look over.
I'll look in here.

- You clear down there?

- Yeah. Start picking.

- You got your
little shoes on today.

- I just put them on
because my feet

started stinging
for some reason.

- Yeah.
Mine are getting sore.

- Anchor's in the pocket.

- Colin, jump in the tender and
I'm gonna keep joao onboard.

- Copy that.

- Gonna release
this one quick.

- Are you ready to go, colin?

- Come on, you [bleep]!
- Have you ever driven?

- Oh, that's why.
All right.

Cap, I am clear on the tender.
I am clear on the tender.

I'm off to a fantastic day.

- Well, proceed
across the channel.

- Oh, we're moving now.
- Yeah.

- Duh.

- Coming.

- Hey, joao, can you get the
port anchor ready to drop?

- Copy. I'm prepping
port anchor now.

- Anchor down.
We're going five in the water.

- We moved the boat four meters

for a good background
for this pop singer.

That's ridiculous.

- Is it stuck?

- No, no, it's not stuck.
It's open.

- Oh, is it loose?
Okay, I'll back down.

- I have yellow at
the water line, captain.

- All right, great.
I'm gonna back down.

- Have you got dijon mayonnaise
up in this bitch?

- No.

- It was a shackle d.
You sure it's not stuck?

It should be pouring out.
- Yeah, it all seems clear.

[ chain clanging ]

- every captain's nightmare is
exactly what I have on sirocco.

What was that?

- Oh, sh--.
Look at that, bro.

This is what happens when you
drop two anchors in the water

and the boat starts
spinning around.

Anchors begin to intertwine
all the time.

- I will not allow
the anchors to beat me.

I ----ing hate the anchors.

It's such a ----ing nightmare.

I'm so over it.

- Four in the water, cap.
Four in the water.

- Did you hear that?
- What?

- Captain sandy was just like,

"I hate these ----ing anchors.

This is such a
----ing nightmare."

- doesn't look like
you're moving, cap.

You may be tight.

- Okay. Mark it down.
We're good.

- Oh, look, it's jack.

- Oh, he's denying me.

- What's up?

- I'm just waiting for my
----ing recipe to load.

That sounds really kinky.
- Yes, I do.

[ laughs ]
I'm pretty close.

- I do actually think travis
is adorable.

But I'm just not in a place

where I want to date
someone onboard.

It was exhausting last year.

- Hannah, are you okay?
- It's anxiety, sandy.

When I fall in love with men,
I go away from them.

- It's just not worth it.

- I've got it now.
- Oh, you do?

- Yeah.
- You got it?

- So it takes two people to
do the anchor, apparently.

- It's such a nightmare,
these anchors.

They're just too small.
- That's a fact.

- I've never seen one
of those on a yacht.

It's crazy.

- ? bonjour ?

- okay. You ready
to try?

- Yes, okay.

You okay?
- Yeah, I'm good.

- Try to get some shots
before I crash!

- You ready to hear the song
over and over again?

- Ready when you are.

- ? ash b ?

? I woke up, like,
good morning ?

? time to get to the day ?

? work like... ?

? wake up, wake up
good morning ?

? good morning, good morning,
good morning ?

- looks cool!

- ? I got nothing to prove ?

? but I still work
like I do ?

- jack, jack? Colin.
Are you checking out the slide?

- Yeah, slide's set up, bro.

- Okay, cool.
Thanks, bud.

- You got my radio, bro?

- Yeah. I think
it's on the bridge.

- You didn't tie the slide
on at all, eh?

- Yeah, two lines,
that one and the black one

on the other side.

- This one was off and this one
here you need to tie it up, eh?

- It is on the other side.

- It doesn't matter.
If it comes off, it comes off.

- Mate, it is tied.

- ----Ing, no.

- Do you think I just do these
like giant -----off burgers?

- Yeah.
- One pound [bleep].

- Nuke.

- Deck crew, deck crew,
just so you know,

we've got two of the girls
heading to the bow.

- Copy.

- I mean, I take me time
with everything.

What's the rush?
The world's goin' nowhere.

- Can I take the
cover off for you?

There you go.
- Thank you.

- I'm gonna get a light
reflector 'cause you're backlit.

Could somebody help me hold
something while I film?

- Sure, sure.

- Oh, my god,
these ----ing stairs

are killing me today.

- Hold this here.

I'm gonna tell you when
you're not in the frame.

Feels great having assistants.

- ? every day ain't sunny ?

? I'ma keep on
working like I'm struggling ?

? I woke up, like,
good morning ?

- I feel like her fluffer,
the reflecting mirror.

- I like the arms out too.

- A fluffer is like
they prep like the actor

or something, right?

Isn't that...

- That's so cool.

- Oh!

I thought it was like a
general term in the movie biz.

I should stop saying that.

Nailed it.
- You just have a pure talent.

You're born with it.

- Back flip getting better?

- [bleep] off.
When was I moody?

- how do you think...

Yeah, it's tied on one side.

If the wind blows,
it ----s off

the other side, obviously.

You're an engineer.
Surely, you should know that.

- If you're clever,
you'd ----ing tie

the slide on, wouldn't you?

- Mate...

If he worked as much
as he ran his mouth,

I mean, that mouth
does overtime.

And it's always bitching
about something.

It's starting
to irritate me now.

- Coming up...

- Deck crew, could somebody come
and help me run plates, please?

Are any of you guys copying me?

- Now I'm getting mad.

Get up in the galley... Now.

- Do they all eat beef?

- No.
- Except for one.

- The dingo ate the baby?

[ laughing ]

- so what are the chances
that jack

actually takes you seriously?

If anything goes wrong,
it's on me...

- Right, right, right.

To hire a good yacht chef,

oftentimes I have them
cook me a meal.

But when you don't
have that luxury,

you have to take
everybody's word for it.

- I'm looking forward
to getting a chef.

I want anastasia back.

- I miss you.

Hey, for tonight
for this rap party?

- Yes?

- It might be fun if
we get the crew to do like

a bit of a dance...
- Yeah.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah,
that would be amazing.

- I also have t-shirts
for everybody and hats.

- That'd be cool.
- Okay.

- Okay. I'll speak to you
after lunch, okay?

- Yeah, thank you.
- Perfect.

- Trav, trav, colin.

- Hey, bro.
You need me?

- Would you mind helping
tie up the tender?

- Yeah, I'll be there
in a second, mate.

- That's sweet.

- Anastasia? Anastasia?
I'm going to seat the guests.

- Copy.

- Oh, yum.

- Deck crew, deck crew,
can I please get a runner?

- Yeah, I'm coming up, mate.
No worries.

I like working the galley, but
I'm not just in the galley.

I'm meant to be on deck as well,

like, [bleep], this is hectic.

- Nice, man.
- Thank you.

- Oh!

- Beautiful, hannah, beautiful.
- Oh, good.

- Okay, anastasia, we're
good to go for the food.

- Great. I'm gonna
start running.

Here we go.

My biggest fear is failing.

[ gasping ]
- oh, my gosh!

- I think the person
who puts the most pressure

on me is definitely myself.

I'll just let you know
what's on the burger.

It's a truffle aioli
with arugula,

white cheddar cheese,
caramelized onions and tomato.

- I have to take
a picture of this.

- Enjoy, guys.

- Oh, wow, this is so amazing.

- That girl does everything
right in the kitchen.

- She's amazing.
- Ooh, ooh!

- Yum.

- How's it goin' in the galley?

- I'm ----ing tired, man.

- Any deck crew on board?
- Yeah.

- Do you know the food
in the bosun's locker?

- No, I can't remember it,
to be honest.

- Okay. Copy.

- What? She wants something
from the bosun's locker?

I know what it all is.

Just think, you got
one life haven't you?

You may as well push it,
see what you can get away with.

- Is that a layer?
- Uh-huh.

I have pink, purple, blue.
- A unicorn cake.

- I'm gonna make her the best
unicorn cake she's ever had.

This is the type of
cake people write songs about.

- That's awesome.
- Mm-hmm.

- So what's the plan?

- I think we should
go down the slide?

- Yes.
- Hell, yeah.

- Let's go.

- Ready? Let's go!

[ shrieks ]

[ laughs ]

- look at this!
It looks like his underwear!

Man bods are awesome!

- So tonight for the rap party,

we're gonna do like a little
coordinated dance for it.

- Cool!
- Oh...

- Joao's gonna be the lead.

- All right!
- They're having a blast!

- This is not that good.

Not great.

- Good?

- I think it's
a little too sweet.

- Mom?

- Question for you, mom.

This is my butter
cream frosting.

It's like a
really nice consistency,

but it's too sweet.
What do I do?

My mom was the head pastry chef
for the president of georgia.

She worked in five-star hotels
and makes beautiful desserts.

My birthday cakes were insane.

I remember being five years old

and all the other kids
were like, "cake!"

and I was like,
"don't touch the cake!

It's beautiful!"

- okay, and then add
it into what I have?

- Yeah. Add it to
what you have.

- All right. Love you. Bye.
- Bye, honey.

- How's your icing going?

- It's coming.
You want to try it?

- Sure.
- It's butter cream.

- Mm.

- It's good?
- Mm-hmm.

I'm ready.
- Cool.

- We have ashley brenton

- Cool. We're thinking about 7
or 7:15 to learn the dance.

- Okay.

- Oh, that looks amazing.
- Thank you.

- All crew, all crew,
meet me on the bow

in five minutes
to practice the dance.

- Copy.

- Okay, guys. Thanks for
coming to my dance studio.

- I'm so excited!

- Today we're gonna be
learning "say the word"

by ashley brenton.

Okay, so the first move
is like a hug

and then like a boom, boom.

And then another one,
boom, boom.

And then we got some, you know,
some "say the word"...

? say the word ?

- and the word is sh--.

- Everything's in three,
guys, okay?

Pay attention!

Boom, boom, hug, boom, boom.

"say the word".

The word!

One, two, three,

arms, one, two,

pose, two, three!

- Growing up, I did dancing
for 14 years.

I did modern jazz

and then, for a couple years,
I added on ballet.

But it was just
so slow and boring,

I had to stop it again.

- That wasn't on beat at all.
The song's in four-four.

- Everything is, but
I'm counting it to three.

- Because if you keep
doing threes

on like a four beat measure,

you're gonna be like off
with like the actual beat.

I'm just saying.
I'm a music nerd.

- No, no.

- Colin, you go up
and do it for us.

- You need to start
the pause first

or make the pause at the end.

- So the pause should be
at the end like...

- So that's what you
want, yeah, yeah.

One, two, three...
- Pause.

- One, two, three, rest,

one, two, three, rest...

One, two, three...

I've gotta show off my skills.

- That was awesome!
- It fills the measures.

- It fits way better.
You are so right.

Don't look, dan!

- Cheerio!

- That looks nice, travis.

- Yeah.
Simple as [bleep].

- A little bit more, joao!

You're good, chief!

- So three courses?
- Uh-huh.

- Cauliflower bisque
with garlic croutons,

filet mignon with
red wine shallot sauce.

So far, the guests
love the food, thank god.

But I need to make sure

their last meal leaves
a good impression.

- Thanks, darlin'.
- Thank you.

- Do you guys want to sit here
and here, and I'll sit here?

- I don't know.

- Ready?
- Ready.

- I'm hungry.

- Deck crew, deck crew,
could somebody come

and help me run plates, please?

- Okay, got it. Excellent.

- That's quite a lot.
You know all this?

- Nah, it's only four steps.
It's not that long.

- Uh, deck crew, deck crew,
any of you guys copying me?

- What do you need?

- I just need some help
running plates, please.

- I will get them.

What are they doing?
Why don't they answer?

- That was for us, eh?

- All right. Coming up.
I didn't hear my radio go.

- You need more than one, right?
- Yeah.

- More guys?
- You got another coming?

- Now I'm getting mad.
Seriously, we're short-staffed.

This crew needs to step it up.

There's a job to be done still.

Whosever on deck, carry a radio.
And get up in the galley...Now.

- Coming up...

- Okay, let's go.
- Boom!

- I'm so ----ing tired
and exhausted

and sick of doing
this sh--.

[ gasps ]
- hit it!

- Can I get a runner, please?

- ----Ing hell.

Oh, you're not even dressed.
Okay, I'll take 'em.

- Oh, thank you.
- You are welcome.

- Mm!
- I'm not a good food runner.

- Here you go.

This is cauliflower bisque
with garlic croutons.

- Thank you so much.
- You are welcome.

- Oh, that's good.
- I'm into it.

- Actually, this is really good.
- Love it!

- Hannah's an absolute honey.

Like I didn't really
notice her that much

in the start of
the whole season.

But check her out
in little pencil skirts.

Like it.

- Gonna start plating.

- Filet mignon with
the red wine shallots.

- All right, I'm gonna
go for it.

- Okay.

- Colin, do you
want to come with me?

- Yeah, sure.
- [bleep].

- How is that, guys?

- Probably the best
cauliflower I've had.

- Yes?
- Yes.

- Are you still
snackin' or what?

Oh, well, you're done.

- Look at colin!
He's just like he's...

- A handsome son of a gun,
isn't he?

- Oh, stop it!
- Multi-talented.

- He's a good-looking
son of a gun.

- Anastasia, anastasia,
all cleared.

- Copy.

- Anastasia has not only
impressed me and the guests.

I think she's
impressed herself.

Because I don't actually know
if she knew how good she was

before she was kind of
pushed into this situation.

- All right.
Ready, guys?

Let's go for it.
- Daughter gets the chicken.

- Yes.
- Piscetarian gets the salmon.

- Daughter.

- Oh, thank you.
That looks beautiful.

- You are welcome.

So for your main course
this evening,

you have a filet mignon
with baby carrots,

cheddar mashed potato,
horseradish foam

and it's a red wine shallot

And for yourself,

you have salmon and
we've given you chicken.

- Thank you so much.
- Thank you.

- Bon appetit!
- This looks so good.

- Lovely.
No one's talking...

- So good.
No one's talking.

We're so quiet right now.
- Awesome.

- They are loving it.

- Oh!

- Too aggressive. Hold.
- Oh, too aggressive.

- Boys, boys,
can you get changed

into your little
t-shirts, please?

- Copy.

- I think this little
outfit suits me.

- Okay, all crew, all crew,
into the main salon, please?

- I need to sit down.
- That's great.

- So we'll line up like here
against the aft doors,

but before the stairs.

So we're gonna be
a little bit snug.

- Can we go over it really fast?

No, I'm just kidding.

- Okay, let's go.

- Home...
- Yeah, yeah.

- Oh, my god!

- This is sick!

- So we wanted
to say congratulations

on your music video.

This is your rap party and we've
got a little surprise for you.

- Hit it!

[ shrieks ]

- ? keep going until
you say the word ?

- oh my god!

- ? keep going until
you say the word ?

- I have no idea what
these dance moves are.

We're like doing like
the duck dance...Wait.

What's it called?
- Oh my god!

- Duh nu nu nu...

- ? keep going 'til
you say the word ?

- oh my god!
I love you guys!

Thank you so much!
- You're welcome.

- That's the sweetest
thing ever.

[ chattering ]

- oh, my god!

This is amazing!
That is so cool!

Oh, my god, this is
the cutest thing ever!

- Oh, my gosh!
- This is so good.

- Like that's amazing!

- My hat's off to you.

- I'm happy you guys are happy.

It feels so good that
ashley feels special.

And to be that person,
to be part of a crew

that made someone feel that way,

that's what makes this
job worth it...

And the money.

- Ash, was this
the best night ever?

- That was the sweetest thing

that anybody has
ever done for me.

- Okay, so I ate
the other piece.

- Sandy!

- Just kidding.
- Oh, okay.

- I'm gonna eat this, though.

This is your calling.
You're a chef.

- I do think I need
better knife skills.

I need to learn that.

- To witness this third
stewardess perform this,

I've never seen
that in my career.

I'm blown away.

- It's amazing how
like parents' skills

transfer down to their kids.
- Yeah.

- What did my parents give me?
- Sex jokes?

[ laughs ]

- uh, me.
- Can you go upstairs, please?

- Yeah, sure.

- It's all fun and games
until time to go to work.

- Okay, I'm gonna try this cake,
but that's it.


- Is it good?
- That is beautiful, honey.

- Okay, I'm ready to go under.

- Okay, guys. Nightie-night.
- Sweet dreams.

- Sweet.
Y'all good in here?

- Yeah. I'm gonna head off.


- Goodnight. Love you.
- Love you too, darling.

Have a good sleep.
- Thank you. You too.

[ sighs ]


- With a person down
in the interior,

you definitely feel it.

Like there is no way we will
survive the charter season.

Anastasia is a band-aid
to a problem.

We can't go on like this.

Oh, my ----ing god.

- Coming up...

- So, colin, if you do it again,
then that's your paycheck.

- Morning, my dude.

- Look who's up.
- I got food for the boys.

- Boys!

- I need to haul
the anchor right at 9:00.

- Okay.
- Look at this.

This is the most beautiful
thing I've ever seen.

- Between being on deck
and being in the galley,

I'm so ----ing tired
and exhausted

and sick of doing
this sh--.

- What do you think
about this proposition

since they're just getting up?

- If I cruise down
for like an hour now...

- Yes.

- I'll just go down now
and then...

- Sweet.
- Cheers, bud.

See you in a bit.

I can't wait to go back
to not working 140%.

- Good morning.
- Morning, captain.

- You ready?

You can start
hauling the anchor.

- Copy that.

- Slow it down before
it hits the top, eh?

- Yeah, yeah.

- That's anchor home.

- All right, I'm gonna
go to the buffet.

- Okay.

- Is there anyone
that could help me

bring the buffet stuff up?
- Yeah, I'm on my way.

- Hello there.
- Hello.

The plates are hot.
Don't burn yourself.

- I love how they
all help out.

- Do you like your pony?

- I like it, yeah.
It's really cute.

- Yum.
- This croissant is amazing.

- Oh, my god.

- Hi, chef!

- I have little smoothie bowls.

- Beautiful.
- Oh, my god, they're so pretty.

- They're mango banana
with toasted coconut.

- You're amazing.
- Oh, my god.

- Yeah, it's good.

- I miss being out on deck.

Being in the galley,
you literally don't go outside.

- I know. I know.

I'm gonna miss it.

- Thank you so much.
- Okay.

- All crew, all crew,
prepare for docking.

- I reckon you're
a ----ing stud muffin.

- Anastasia?
Have you seen my epaulettes?

- I have not.

- I've had other priorities
than ironing epaulettes.

- Do you reckon?
- Yeah.

- Light bulb.

Sandy, sandy, hannah.

Just for something super cute,

how do you feel
about doing departure

in the ab shirts for them?

- I love it.

I think it's a great idea.

- Okay, perfect.
- What the [bleep]?

[ laughing ]

- it's just 'cause
I can't find my epaulettes.

- You can't find
your epaulettes.

- We are 5-0 to the breakwater
on our starboard side.

All traffic clear of our stern.

- Switching to the port wing.

- Eight meters off the dock.
Send lines now.

- Monsieur.

- Well done, everyone.

- Putting my bras away,
you know.

- Ah, there's my
----ing shirt.

Okay, everyone.

Change back into
their epaulettes.

- That's what I thought.

- My tetris
skills are insane.

Oh, yeah.

- They're all wearing
ashley brenton shirts?

- Look at this.
This is so cute.

- There is nothing to say...

Except you guys are just...

- Thanks for coming.
Hope you had a good time.

- So grateful.

- Thanks for everything
and thank you for the food.

- Thank you so much
for your awesome food.

Nice to meet you.
- You're so welcome.

- Yay.
- You're the best.

- Captain sandy, what can I say?

You guys were so honest and
sincere how you received us.

Chef, you killed it.
- Thank you.

- So I'm just gonna say
thank you very, very much.

Really, this is a nice chunker
for you this time for the crew.

- Thank you!
- We love you!

- We love you all.
Thank you.

- Bye.
- Thank you.

- You guys are the best.
- Oh, they're so lovely.

- Let's turn the boat around

and then we'll meet in the main
salon for the trip memo.

- Well done, guys.
- Charter three down.

- Another one bites
the dust, boys.

- I reckon that was
a massive tip.

- You haven't had a massive tip
in a while then, I presume?

- Hey-oh!
- [ laughs ]

- all crew, all crew,

meet me in the main salon
in five minutes.

- Copy. Meeting time!

- So, colin, next time
maybe when you do the anchor,

you can move a fender, you
could see the chain piling up.

- Oh, [bleep] me.

- You're not in trouble.

But if you do it again,
then that's your paycheck...

I'm kidding.

Sort of.

Anyway, this charter
went off so well.

I love that the team
came together.

You did an amazing job.
- Thank you.

- You are definitely a chef.

So, because we did
such a fabulous job,

this is the biggest tip we've
ever gotten in the med ever.

- What?

- $27,000.

- What?
- Whoa!

- Now remember,
we're one crew down.

- Yes!

Oh, my god,
this is so much money.

- $2,330.

- I just want to lay naked
in my cabin

and have hannah ----ing spread
the money all over me.

- Cheers to you guys.
Thank you.

- Cheers.

- You know what, for that tip,
[bleep] it,

we don't need a chef.

[ laughs ]
- awesome. Thank you.

- Well done, everyone!

- Uh, where in the [bleep]
is my headband?

- Anastasia, can you
please come to the bridge?

Anastasia, to the bridge,

- Copy.

- Okay, so I asked you
to be the chef

when we were in the weeds
and you stepped in.

And when I see what you have
been doing, it's phenomenal.

- Thank you.

- I have a new chef ready to go,

but you can see we got
the biggest tip ever.

And I'm sure the food might have
had something to do with it.

There is not a question
in my mind

that you can do this as a chef.

- Okay.

- So my question is,
do you want to remain a chef

or do you want to go back
to being third stew?

- So my question is, do
you want to remain a chef

and do you think
you can do this?

Or do you want to go back
to being third stew?

- I want to continue as a chef.

[ chuckles ]
- I'm glad you said that.

Your automatic answer
is an answer for me.

I'm gonna stick
with anastasia.

I trust her, I've witnessed
what she can do.

And she has the right attitude.

I'm glad you said yes to this.
I really am.

I think you got this.

Why wouldn't I
want to propel someone

from a third stewardess
to the galley?

Let's do this.
Let's see your potential.

- Thank you, captain sandy.

- I'm gonna pay attention if
you're not owning that galley.

You're not a third stew,
you are a chef.

- I'll try and remember that.
- Okay.

- So before, we just needed
somebody to cook the food

and that happened to be me.

But now I'm the ----ing chef.


- Honestly, we just got the best
----ing tip we've ever got.

[ cell phone rings ]

[ woman speaking french ]

- bon jour.
This is captain sandy

from motor yacht sirocco.

I'm looking for a third stew.

- Honestly, we have like
such a team this year.

I've never worked with a crew

that's like come together
like we have.

- That's really great.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Hannah, hannah, can you
come to the bridge, please?

- Copy, copy.

- Huh?

- Is this one of those
"I just gave you

really good news and now I'm
gonna give you some bad news"?

- No, I actually have good news.
- Oh.

- Well, I think it's good news.

Because she did a great job,
I think she's gotta be the chef.

I have a third stew
ready to come onboard

that has experience.
- Okay.

- I'm actually gonna put travis
in the galley with her.

He's great in the galley.
We're gonna be fine.

- Okay.
- It's gonna be fine.

- I don't think anastasia should
have been given the chef job.

Not because
she's not a good chef.

Because she doesn't
have the experience

and this is not cadet camp.

She can't come
into a chef position

and try and learn
while she's doing it.

- Go drink your second
glass of champagne.

- Thank you.

- All crew, all crew, we have an
official announcement to make.

The chef that was acting chef
is now the full-time chef.

And we have travis staying in
the galley to help her do that.

- [bleep].
Oh, [bleep] me.

- I'm gonna keep travis
in the galley.

He's doing a great job.
He's managing really well.

And the deck department is okay.

- Yeah, baby!

- Let's go put on bikinis!

- [bleep].
- Are you nervous?

Anastasia's good.
I don't think she's good enough.

- She's not a superstar, no.
- Yeah.

- She's also had travis.
Can she do both jobs?

Because I'm getting my
----ing deckhand back.

We've had one deckhand leave us
and go into the galley.

We have one deckhand
who can hardly work.

We have basically
two of us

on deck who are willing
and able to do the work.

We're five steps back.

Anastasia thought with her ego
when she took the position.

- And also, in a purely
selfish way,

this is the first time
I've had a strong team.

And I want to keep
my strong team, okay?

Because at the end of the day,
it's all about me.

- All crew, all crew,
I'm going into town.

- Okay. Enjoy.

- Yeah, yeah.

Accident like not doing your
----ing job right accident.

- Hello, ladies.
- Hello, chica bonita.

- I got my two ho's
right next to me.

The charter agent just messaged
me the provisioning list.

- I now have
a very big responsibility.

I would be lying
if I said

that I feel 100% confident
about it, because I don't.

But I gotta fake it
till I make it.

I gotta pretend like I have
the biggest balls on the boat.

- You guys just do your
provision thing.

I'll just lie here.
- Okay.

----Ing hell.

- Jack, I think your services
are needed on the bow.

- [bleep] that.
Don't go to the bow.

- No.

- Oh, this is lovely!
Do you need a hand, girls?

- No, we're good, thanks.

- Colin said
you needed me up here

to help you clean
and stuff like that.

- And we've lost jack.

- Is he lost in
the realm of hineys?

- Yes.

- Jack, jack, do you want
to finish as early as you can?

Or are you gonna stay
until eight?

I bet he doesn't even
have his ----ing radio.


- At least you know, if
you dangle a butt in his face,

he'll do whatever you
want him to.

- If you dangle anything but
work in his face, he'll do it.

We're down with one of our
strongest crew members on deck.

You know, now we're three.
We need to pick up more slack.

We don't need someone
giving us extra slack.

I've never had to deal
with someone

who just doesn't want to work.

- Say, have you seen--

- oh!

- Oh, my god!
Thank you so much.

- Oh, my god!

We love you!

- What he lacks in work ethic,
he makes up for in humor.

- We're almost done here.

I'm gonna get jack to
wash the bridge forward.

Then we can go on break.

What are you doing, bud?
- What?

- What are you doing?
- Taking the hose down.

- We're gonna have an issue.

- Well, we still got
work to do, bud.

- Just work, just work, just
work until we're finished.

- From top to bottom,
we'll accomplish what we can.

I want to do bridge forward and
I want to do the stern and...

- It's not up to you
to decide...

- ...Whether you're
----ing finished or not.

Do you understand that?

- It is not up to you.
No, it's not.

- It's not up to you.
For ----'s sake.

Why is it so difficult?

Hey, I think I finished.

- It's not up to you
to decide

whether you ----ing
finished or not.

It is not up to you.
No, it's not.

- Okay, I'll give you a time.

When we finish at seven,
then we're done.

- We finish at seven,
we finish at seven.

I haven't got a
problem with that.

- For ----'s sake.
Why is it so difficult?

- What was he doing?
- He's got a beer in his hand.

He's putting
the ----ing hose away.

If jack had any motivation
to be on deck,

I'd get more out of him
because he'd want to learn.

He doesn't want to learn.

He's here for the money
and a good time.

It's frustrating because
I know I can be a good leader

for the people who
want to be led, honestly.

- Will you do my butt?
- Yeah.

- Just don't get it
on my bikini.

- It feels like you
sh-- your pants

and I'm like rubbing
your poo into our skin.

- You look good
doing work, jack!

It's a nice change!

Obviously, I've pushed joao.

He's talking down to me.

But I've crossed the line,

so I'm not gonna keep crackin'
on and windin' him up.

- I heard him being like,
"I gotta wash all of this."

it's like, ugh.

- Joao, are we really
working until seven?

- No. When we rinse this,
we've finished.

- Oh, this is so comfy.

- Oh, you're doing good, boo.

- It's just like heaven.

- What ----ing sh-- did you
have to deal with today?

- It's wank.
Just write a ----ing list.

And then you guys know
what you're doing.

----Ing crazy, mate.

I'll write you a list
in a minute.

I'll back jack till I die.

I mean, I know that he
can be quite lazy at times.

But it's also mainly because
of how you speak to him.

If you [bleep] with jack,
he's like, "[bleep] you."

I absolutely understand that
because I'm the exact same way.

But anyway, like that's it.

Let's just have
a good night tonight.

- I think I might shower.
- Okay, baby.

- Ooh!

- I love the pockets.

- I'm so excited to go out.

I just really need
to blow off some steam.

I'm a ----ing chef now
and what do chef's do?

They ----ing drink.

- Okay, guys, let's go!

- Whee!

- Colin, come with us.
- I'll go with the ladies.

- Woo!

- Yeah, we're gonna
eat a colin sandwich!

- Yum, yum, yum, yum!

- Hey, guys, I just want
to say thanks so much.

- Cheers.

- You guys have
really been amazing.

- Thank you.
- Thank you, sir.

- I mean, this bag suits me,
to be honest.

- Really does.
It looks cute.

- You like it?
- I like it.

- In here.
- In here?

- The pint house, absolute
classic piss-fest.

- I'm going straight for a shot.
- You doing a shot, huh?

- One shot, one drink.

- Porn star martini, please.

- Thank you, miss lady.
- Yes!

Thank you so much.

- Right, cheers, everyone!

- To the best ----ing
tip of the season!


- To the vegan!
- To the chef!

- To one less crew member,
an extra tip!

- Yay!

- I'll make it work.

The thing is, like
people who've never been

in that position
don't understand.

Oh, you just cook.
It's like no.

It doesn't just
----ing happen.

It takes a lot of
----ing planning.

And 50% of that charter is what
I ----ing put on that plate.

- That's a lot.

- And like I stand,
and it's painful,

I didn't come here
to stand

in a ----ing galley
by myself all day.

- Right. That's not fair.

- I just feel like
I can't say no.

- [bleep], no.
That's bullsh--.

If you don't want to do it,
you say no.

- Say no?
- Yes.

You're employed
to be a third stew

and you're great at it.

You're great
at being a chef too.

But are you a seven-star chef?

Are you a michelin chef?
No, you're not.

- Read my face, dude.

Tell me I'm great.

- These charters that
we've been through?

Yes, absolutely.
- Where are you going?

Want me to come?
I'll come.

- I swear to [bleep],
I was just being honest.

Don't [bleep] me over.

- I think she's just upset at
this situation that's she's in.

- She has a say in
what she's doing.

- Next on "below deck med"...

- Looks like our new stew
is walking down the doc.

- Here we go.
Please don't suck.

- Who the [bleep] died
and made him moral police?

- Jackie siegel.

She and her husband were
featured in the documentary,

"the queen of versailles".

- Am I supposed to
like unpack myself?

Do you have mint jelly?

- Yeah, I'm sure we do.

- I don't know how
to make mint jelly.

I have no ----ing clue.

- Oh, my god!
- Whoa!

- What is that?

- Wipe off things together.

[ chuckles ]
- oh, yeah, sure.

- With travis, it's just fun,
light and playful.

- To the very top
of the mountain....

- Oh, my god,
you're bringing chairs too?

- Everything for you.
- Oh, my god,

I can't believe that.

- I'm dying...

- This is crazy.
Is the cutlery there?

- There's nothing in the van.

- ----Ing hell.

- Hannah, hannah, joao.