Below Deck Mediterranean (2016–…): Season 4, Episode 10 - Docked and Loaded - full transcript

Captain Sandy continues her on-going battle with Sirocco's anchors, while Joao and Travis continue their deep dive to set the anchors free. Baseball star, Johnny Damon along with his family...

- Previously on
"below deck med"...

- Oh, my god,
what are you wearing?

- I like that we're just
the most disgusting version

of ourselves and
we still like each other?

- Date night.
- Date night, baby.

- Johnny damon is a legendary
baseball player, now retired.

- Hi, johnny. Colin.
- Colin, how are you?

I'm johnny.

- If I can please
the queen of versailles,

I can please an
american baseball player.

- Okay.

At the end of the day,
it's anastasia's galley.

- June, June, hannah.

Oh, dude, come on.

- Where...I can't think.

- Again. It's stuck, cap.

- Have fun in monaco.

- We definitely have
something on our chain.

- I can jump in and scuba dive.

- Go in.

It's a risk to send
travis and joao in the water.

One slip could be
the end of their life.

- Like, what the [bleep]?

- Our goal is to tie a line onto
the old anchor chain, lift it,

lower our anchor
so it swings free.

Then raise our anchor up
into the pocket

and then drop the old chain.

Sounds easy, right?

- Thank you.

- Looks so cute.

- Is that a banana
in that pocket

or are you just happy
to see me?

- See ya.

- So where's the anchor sitting?

- Captain sandy, captain sandy.

- Great. Thank you.

- Raise both sides
until it stops.

Lower the anchor...
- Five meters even.

- Yes.

- If this doesn't work and
the crew can't get the chain

off the other anchor,
which was left by someone else,

then I have no other choice
but to drop and leave my anchor.

So if you don't
have your anchor,

you can't enter a port.
That's illegal.

I do not want to kill
my charter season.

I do not want
to leave my anchor.

- Please...

- All right, we're here.
- A party!

Uh-oh, stay away,
stay away from shopping.

- So monaco is this little
country on the french riviera.

It is just lush.

It's like where the rich
of the rich live.

Like, you have to be
a millionaire to live there.

- Oh, my goodness.
- Oh, it's gorgeous.

- Last night, I had some
issues with temperature

which really sucks.

- I'm sorry.
I have to...

- Get yours a bit
cooked as well?

Can I get this cooked
a little bit more?

- I can't control
the food arrives hot

from the galley to the table.

So I'm not gonna let
johnny damon and his friends

tell me that I'm a sh--
cook because of it.

- What are you gonna do for
dinner? Italian?

- Yeah.

- So take your time,
whatever you want.

June and I will just hang
around until you guys

are finished exploring.
- All right.

- I'm not really hungry,
but do you want to eat?

- Yeah.

- I'm thinking of just letting
go of the anchor first

with just the hope
that it drops.

- ----Ing dope idea because
our lines,

it'll... It'll come off, right?

- You try. Try.

- Oh, I needed this.

- Bonjour.
Do you do takeaway?

- Yes.
- Okay.

- Can we see a menu?

- Thank you.

- You're like finally.

Do you feel like
you've settled in yet?

- I feel comfortable
with the guys, kind of.

Like colin I think,
is very sweet.

- He's such a sweetie.

- Cleaning cabins
like a third stew.

- You did it!


- A little bit of struggle,
that one.

- Yeah.

It's nice me and joao

can put our differences aside.

But just 'cause
we work well together

doesn't mean we're best mates.

- Well done!

Hey, hannah, our chain
is off the bottom.

Our anchor's in the pocket,
so we're gonna go to monaco.

- Copy, copy.

- Hey, colin.

- Copy that.

- He got sick really,
really suddenly

and then he just
passed away, yeah.

- I'm so sorry.

- I'm thinking about
what's going on,

but I'm like also needing
to be strong for my mom.

I don't have my dad, you know,

who always said
stick up for yourself.

Never let anyone treat you
with disrespect and everything.

So it's hard not having
anyone that really pushes you.

- Well, I'm real sorry
about your dad, girl.

- I'm sorry about your brother.
- It sucks.

- It does, yeah.

- Oh, thank you very much.
- Thank you so much.

- He's trying to beat us.

- You okay?
- Yeah.

- Just tired?

- I've been up since four.
- You didn't get down?

- I went from four and then
I did this anchor sh--.

I was like, cool.

I gotta cook all the meals
and sh-- for the day

and then be on deck all day.

I just get tired
so I [bleep] off.

And I'll just express how
I feel about everything.

- Yes.

- Which I usually would just
hold in just like, deal with it.

To be honest, me and hannah
are pretty much just friends.

If the opportunity arise
that me and hannah

ended up shagging,
I'd be into it.

[ laughs ]

- okay, I need the anchor team.

- Cheers.
- Cheerio.

- Good chat, mate.
Oh, there you are.

- Did you have a nice
boat ride, colin?

- Fantastic.

- Anchor down, anchor down.

- Medium stay, 11:00.

Can she hear me?
Can you hear me?

- Okay, we're good.
I'm happy.

- It's funny how people
can be from such

different walks of life
but have so much in common.

Like jack's the first guy
that I've gone on a date with

who is like really
similar to me.

- That's so good.

Let's find a spot and lay down.
- Yeah, sure.

- Yeah.

- I'm gonna take
this belt off.

- Wow.

Holy crap.

Hmm, serious weather, man.

I looked at the weather two
hours ago, and it was okay.

Now I look at it
and it says

it's gonna start
blowing around midnight.

Hello, this is captain sandy
from motor yacht sirocco.

Do you have any slips available?

Eta will be 1900 hours.

If I choose to stay and
we're in sh-- weather

and everyone's
in fear for their life,

you're a bad captain.

- Oh, your phone's ringing.

- Is it? Oh.

- Hello?
- Hi, aesha.

- Hi, captain.

- I need you guys back
on the boat immediately.

The weather's coming
in really fast.

- I'll round them up.
- Okay, thanks.

- All right.
Thank you, captain.

The weather is getting
really ----ing bad.

And she's like
we need to go right now.

- Deck crew, deck crew, bring
the guests back immediately.

Weather system's coming
in a lot quicker.

The swell has already picked up.

I need to leave
before it gets worse.

And the only slip available at
this point is st. Tropez

and it's three hours away.

You need to go fast.
- Copy that.

- There's a big
weather system coming in

and we need
to leave immediately.

- Can you control
the weather, please? Jesus!

- Coming up...

- Oh!
- Waa, waa, waa!

- I mean, I just...
- This is not happening!

- May I say...
- Don't...

- Yes!

- Deck crew, deck crew,

I need you to bring
the guests back immediately.

Weather system's
coming in a lot quicker.

- Copy that.

- We have to get to st. Tropez
before seven p.M.

If we don't make it there,
they're gonna close the harbor.

We're gonna lose our slip.

- Are we all
getting on this one?

- Yes, you're gonna be on here.
- Okay.

- Take care.

- Come on!
Let's see that arm, johnny!

- Come on, let's go!

- Hi. Did you have fun?

- What'd you find on the radar?

- All right, so we feel so bad.
- Uh-oh.

- The weather, the rocking
and the rolling...

- Oh, no!
We're having a great time.

- We're gonna take you
to st. Tropez.

- Awesome.
- Woo!

- Let's do this.

- How was monaco?
- Monaco was fabulous.

- Yes?
- Ooh!

- All right.

- We'll do dinner
onboard at eight.

- Got that right.
- Colin! Come and do this!

Kick it in, kick it in.

Keep going, keep going.

- Keep going!
- Keep going!

Yeah, it's good. Sweet.

- Good?
- Yeah.

- Swim platform is closed, cap.

- Haul the anchor quickly!
We're behind schedule.

I've never missed
a docking before,

but right now I have no idea
if I'm gonna make it.

- Anchor's home, anchor's home.

- Get a beer can opener.

We'll show you how to do it
in the united states.

- The united states of america!

- 'merica!
- 'merica!

- Oh! That was you!

[ laughs ]
I didn't even do that!

- There you go.
- Thank you so much.

- You're welcome.

- What are you doing for dinner?

- Caprese salad,
eggplant rolatini

and affogato for dessert.

- You forgot dessert?
What'd you say?

- Affogato.
- Affogato?

- Affogato.

If I can cook
crossing the north sea

with a six-meter swell,

literally clipped
in to the galley,

I think I can handle a
little swell on a motor yacht.

I ----ing love pesto.

- So they are all up
on the top deck.

- Okay.

- They're drinking
st. Tropez blondes.

Dinner's at eight and
we'll do white wine glasses.

Those ones we don't
have too many of,

so it's kind of better
to use the... Not these.

You know, the ones like this?
That go like that?

- Yeah.
- The ones down here.

- Yeah...Uh, yeah.

- Yeah?
Do you remember or no?

- What are you talking about?
Wait. The big ones?

The bigger ones?
- Yes. Okay.

Oh, my god.

- These are mine!

- You want to look
at your cards or...

- Would not cut the mustard.

Throw it at someone's head.

- They need to realize
like they're still

in a professional environment.

Stop smooching with your
boyfriend and get back to work.

- [bleep]. She's right.

- You don't go into an office

and just see people randomly
making out in the corridors.

So do it in your cabin.

- Oh, isn't it so nice to have
smooches during the workday?

- There's something
jumping in the water here.

- That's a whale.

- All crew, all crew,
we have whales ahead of us.

- There he goes.

- Can we slow down?

- No. I have a
schedule to keep.

- Oh, my god!

- Good one!

You're just winning me
over today.

[ laughs ]

- okay to come on bridge?
- Yes, of course.

They're gonna close the port
and I won't be able to get in.

We need to be in st. Tropez
in like an hour.

- No, we do and you will.

Then I'll be up all night
driving around in circles.

[ chuckles ]

- ben, will you fix my dress?
- Sure.

[ mumbles ]

- you guys wanna see
my [bleep] ring?

- Oh, what a beautiful moon.

- Spread some of these.

- Hey, joao, I'm gonna be on the
starboard wing to start with.

- Copy.

We are clearing the breakwater
on our port side at 10.

Docking stern two.

This is my first time
and I'm nervous.

Because the difference
between a meter and none

are million dollar mistakes.

- Looking good on your bow
in the port here, sa-- captain.

Eight meters and closing on
our port quarter, and...

- And 20 to the black boat.

- 20 to the black boats
off our starboard quarter.

- Look how tight.
- Yeah, seriously.

- Travis, I'm going to
need you to tell me

on the starboard bow just this.

- Yeah, copy.

- Oh, this is gonna be
a squeeze and a half.

- Five and closing
on your starboard bow.

- Can I swing the bow
to starboard?

- You wanna come
a little bit more astern

before you can swing.

- We're not going there.
- Is she getting in there?

- Hell, no.

- Can I start swinging now?

- You're gonna be super tight.

- Joao, can I swing now?

- If she threads that needle,
that's gonna be impressive.

- [bleep].
This is tight.

- Where's joao?

- We're not going there.
- Is she getting in there?

- Hell, no.
- [bleep]. This is tight.

- Jack, do you want
to take that side?

- Can I swing now?

- Yeah, you can swing.
You're good.

- Yes, you are cleared to swing.
Cleared to swing.

- You're gonna drop
the port anchor.

- Copy. Tell me when.

- Drop it now.

I can't see my starboard bow,
just for the record.

- We will need to come two
meters to port to be aligned.

- She's on the bottom,

and you've got 15 on
your starboard bow,

- here we go!
We're going in!

- Look, we got a crowd.

- Are we clear off
the black boat?

How many meters clear?
- Yeah. Two.

- We have two meters
on our starboard side.

And we have one meter
on our port.

Can we give a slight
kick to port?

That's perfect.
- One!

- We have one meter either side.

This line is perfect.

Watch the fenders
don't touch.

Could we have a slight
kick to port?

- We have five meters
to the dock.

Five meters to the dock.
Throw the line across.

We are two meters to the dock.
We could go one more meter.

That'd be perfect.

Spin it around
a few times there!

Could you hold, captain sandy?
- You got here, joao!

- We are secure on the stern.

Tighten up a little bit on
the anchor would be perfect.

- Well done, everyone.

Our first time docking like this
together, you were amazing.

- Hi. Is hussein still captain?

Okay. It was a while ago
I worked on it.

- Hey, captain,
that was cool, ma'am.

- That was awesome.
- Pretty cool.

- That was super tight, eh?
- That was tight.

- What an absolute boss.

- My butt was puckered up and
I didn't have the control!

- Seriously!

- You did an amazing job.
- Thank you, captain.

- Every word I listened
to was precise, calm...

- Thank you so much.
- Yeah.

- I'm really proud.
That was awesome.

Everyone pulled up.

I feel fantastic. Thank you.

- I'm proud of you.
- Thank you.

Thank you so much.

- What I want, though...
I want an ice cream.

I'm gonna go get one.
- Okay.

- You can be seated for dinner
whenever you're ready.

[ giggles ]

- our usual position?

- Caprese salad with pesto?
- Yep.

- This caprese salad
looks pretty,

but pretty food don't fill up
an american baseball player.

Are they ready after that one?
- Yes, ma'am.

- I don't want to push anastasia
to the point where she starts

going out of her comfort zone
and ----ing up food.

- To start with,
you have a

deconstructed caprese
salad with pesto.

Bon appetit!
- What does deconstructed mean?

- You have to put it together.
- I want a deconstructed mcdlt.

- I want to keep dinner
simple and familiar.

And italian food is something
I'm familiar with.

It kind of just shrinks
the room for error a bit.

With basil, can run.

- Fine.

This puppy?

- Don't tip the plate!
- I won't.

- Is this eggplant?
- Yes.

- Oh, boy...

- Oh, you don't like eggplant?

- I'll let you know afterwards.

- Okay. So your main course
is eggplant rollatini.

- You like it?

- Don't feel guilty
that our food was sh--ty.

- Small portions, though.

- I'm really proud of all
my dishes I put out today.

- June, June, hannah.

- I think she should
check her connection.

- We have checked her
connection many times, sandy.

Has anyone got eyes
on my third stewardess?

June, by any chance?

- Hannah, I'm in the laundry.

- Why don't you answer
your ----ing radio, then?

Honey, I don't know
what's going on...

- Hannah, I don't know.

I didn't hear you calling me.
I don't know.

- Let me have a look then.

- Do you want me to radio test?
- Yeah, please.

- Radio test June.

- Okay.

Maybe I can't understand
like my own name

if you guys say June.
- Okay.

- I just wish hannah
knew that I'm a nice girl.

I can even feel her eye roll.

Mm, whatever that face is.

I feel like I'm getting
bitched at, but I don't hear...

- Check, check,
check, check, check.

- Copy, copy, copy, copy, copy.

[ beatboxing ]

- I'm gonna ----ing murder
all of you. Stop!

- All of you, stop!
- That should work now.

- You gonna come up
and do your little speech?

- Yeah.

- What speech?
What are you gonna do?

- I just explain the dessert

and then let them
give me praise.

- She just does it
to feed her ego.

- Silly, silly woman...

- Can you guys run these?
And I'll come up with the shots.

- Looks like synchronized
swimming on land.

- I can do that!
And that too!

- Dessert time!
- Yeah.

- Woo!
- I'm on a super yacht!

- How was your dinner?

- Not as good as the way
you docked!

Let's give her
a round of applause.

- Let me tell you what you're
having for dessert tonight.

It's called affogato.
It's a classic italian dessert.

You pour in the espresso

and the shot of grand marnier
and you eat it like that.

Enjoy, guys!
- Just ignore him.

- Enjoy.

- ----Ing sandy, stealing
all my thunder.

- You're joking!

- Oh, very rich.

- Then it turns into soup.
- It has turned into soup.

- I like this.
- That's good, isn't it?

- What about this?
- Yeah.

That's actually
quite nice, you know.

It's gonna make
me glass dirty.

- I'm gonna knock you off at 10.
- Okay, sure.

- And give you eight
and a half hours tonight.

- Oh...

- Goodnight, June!
- Goodnight.

- How's it going?
- Fine.

- That didn't sound very upbeat.

- Why is that?

- It's just a vibe.

Like I'm not
enjoying this at all.

- What you need to do is
just go to sleep and reset.

And wake up in
your happiest mood.

Do you know what I mean?
- Yeah.

Thanks for your concern.

- Cool. I'll talk to you later.

- Okay. Don't say anything
'cause I can handle myself.

- I'm just concerned
about you, that's all.

- Don't be concerned and
go out and try to fix things.

- What do you mean?

I'm not trying...
What is there to fix?

- You'll find something
in your noggin to fix.

[ chuckles ]

- what do you mean?
Are you okay?

- This is my invisible curtain.
This conversation's done.

- What is going...

Can we talk now?

I can still see you.

Are you ready to come out?

See you later.
- Go away.

Being the new girl,
you don't know who to trust.

So I'm nervous that I gave him
a little too much information.

You ain't captain save-a-ho,
you know?

- No randoms on the boat!

- Oh, we got some!

- Hell, yeah!
- We have to check.

- Sweet dreams.
- See you in a bit.

- Sweet, bro.
- Peace out, brother.

- He told me the
gentleman next door...

- Yeah?

- Is saying that he wants
to come on our boat.

- ...?
- Correct! Yes!

- I wonder if he remembers me.

I worked for...
In my very, very first season.

Didn't particularly want to see
him when I was working for him.

So I certainly don't
want to see him now.

- This is...

- I'll never forget his son
came on who was four years old.

And I said, "you can't
wear your shoes on deck.

You know that."

and he goes, "they're not shoes.
They're tod's."

I'm like, "this little
----ing prick!"

- but where are y'all guys from?

- America.
- America.

- Oh!

- Colin, do you want
me to wake up joao?

- Good call.
- Okay.

- Joao, joao, hanna.
- Go ahead.

- Yeah, can you come up, please?
There's a guy on the boat.

- He was just shaking my hand.
- Yeah, I know.

Actually, we're closing up.
Were closed up as well now.

- Someone invited him on.

Just maybe go out and be
like, "hey, what's up?"

get the [bleep] off
in a nice way.

- Oh, joao, you look so cute
in those pajamas!

I need to put my pyjammies....

- Hey, that's your boat?

- No. That one.
- This one.

- We should drink on that.

- Okay. I'm gonna quickly
make this professional.

- What's the boat worth?
- Let's go over and see it.

- Hey, go check out his boat
and then come back.

- Is that a super yacht or
is that like a petite yacht?

- Awesome! Let's go!
- Hey, listen! Listen!

I am the person
that's in charge

and I say no.

- I'm not really a lady.
I'm not.

- I'm confused.
- Don't get confused.

I'm not a lady.

He's not ----ing
going anywhere.

- Tomorrow I will.
I'm not messing with her.

- Okay, may I ask you...
- Listen!

Waa, waa, waa, waa, waa!
Not happening!

- May I just...
- Yeah!

- Go check out his boat
and then come back.

- Nope.

He's not ----ing
going anywhere.

- Tomorrow I will.
I'm not messing with her.

- So may I ask you...

- Listen!
Waa, waa, waa, waa!

Not happening!

- May I...
- Don't...!

- Yeah! Woo!

- What did I say?
He's not ----ing going!

- Time to go.
- You're done!

- I'm gonna have to ask you
very nicely to leave.

Thank you.

May I please escort you
to your boat?

- They're not arresting him,
are they?

- Take work out of it.

The second a man
is physical with a woman,

that's it for me.

- Don't! Stop it!

- You wanna come have a drink?

- Do you want me to come
off the boat right now?

Because I will!

I ----ing rule this boat
and you ----ing

don't [bleep] with me, okay?

- ...Escalate the issue.

If you don't mind.

- I ----ing make
this sh-- happen

and you don't
----ing touch me.

- Can we please
just like chill?

- All right.

- These people
need to understand

that this is not disneyland.

This is st. Tropez and we
don't act like that here.

Can you just bring
the passenger rail up, please?

- I have a 357 for a reason.

- Drunk billionaires, you know,

people who are
fighting each other,

it's something that
I really didn't sign up for.

- You all right?
- Yes.

- Bedtime!
- We've seen enough.

- Goodnight, guys.
- All right, john, cheers.

- He must be working out.

- You okay? Sleep time?

- Mama's tired.

- Ow! It got me!

- I'm sorry.

Orange juice does that
to people sometimes.

It's dangerous.

I'm usually a little awkward
when I'm around beautiful women.

And, you know, talking to June,
I am the most awkward.

Maybe that's just
part of my charm.

I don't know.

- Good morning.
- Morning.

Heard about your...Bear hug.

- It was only a bear hug.

Getting windy, eh?

- Getting.

- Hot. That plate is hot.

- Good morning.
- Morning.

- I heard you guys
had an eventful night,

but joao took care of it.
- Yes, he did.

- Boy, he was a monster.
- Joao was...

- I've got hot frittata, guys!
- All right!

- Sound's amazing.
Go enjoy your breakfast.

- Thank you.

- I don't want the chef's
food to get cold.

- Everybody's up?

- It's delicious.
- Liked that quiche.

It was excellent.

- That's the waves,
nine knots, but look.

Here it's worse.

60 knots of wind.
Holy crap.

You know, we have
weather coming in.

When the wind kicks up,
you guys should be heightened.

- Okay.
- Okay?

- Okay.

- When weather's like this,

I need my deckhands
on deck, period.

We need to be ready for
anything at a moment's notice.

And right now, it's important
that I don't miss

this window of weather

or we're gonna be stuck
in st. Tropez.

And I'm gonna miss my turnaround

and our pickup for
the next charter.

- Uh-oh.

- You're absolutely
gonna kill me.

- What's going on?
- We have to leave.

- We have to leave. Okay.
- Yeah.

Because they're gonna
close the port

and I won't be able to get in.

- Fine by me.
- Thank you.

All crew, all crew,
we are ready to depart.

- Who ----ing knows, honey.
Mine is not to question why.

- So what do you wanna
do for meals today?

Because you just
finished breakfast.

- Five or six?
- Sounds good.

- Joao, I'm gonna be
on the port wing.

- Copy that.
This is a charter from hell.

We're fighting with the weather,
we're fighting with the anchor.

We're fighting with
the owner of the boat next door.

- Bye!
He's a wimp.

- If it's not one thing,
it's another.

Stern lines are all clear.

We are two meters from the dock.

Anchor's up.
Anchor is up.

- I need distances, joao.

- We've got eight meters
on the starboard side,

eight meters on the port side.

Five meters from our
port beam.

- 10 on the bow.

- Can I swing the stern
to starboard?

- How many meters from
the ground line there?

- Seven.

- Clear to swing
the stern to starboard.

- I'd be so nervous
trying to do this.

- 15 off your bow.

We have eight meters from our
port quarter.

- That looks good.

- Well done, everyone.
You guys did a great job.

Thank you.
- Thank you.

- Guess I should
put my swimsuit on.

- Swimsuit time.

- Are we going home,
captain sandy?

Back into port?
- Yes.

- Today?

- It's supposed
to get nasty tonight.

So we're probably gonna
go straight to our slip.

- All right, colly wolly!
We're gonna go home.

- June, June, aesha.
- Huh?

- Yeah?
- I'm right here.

- Okay. Let me
turn the iron off.

- Okay. So I spoke
to the guests.

We're just gonna do one meal.

- One meal?
- Yes.

I reckon dinner around five.

- Weird, but okay.
- Okay?

- Yes.

- Aw, thank you.

- You've got your
fenders for there, yes?

- Yeah. I'm taking
one down there.

- Are those crisps
gonna go flying?

- I think to carry them,

you should carry them with
this over it.

- Yes.

- Boat hauls ass, man.

- I would totally go in that.

Woo! Ride this pony!

- How many knots are we going?

- 17 and a half.

- And what's top speed?
- Probably like 20 knots.

- Are you gonna go throw up?
- No.

- We're gonna get this.
Go get your deck ready.

- All right.
- Thank you.

Deck crew, deck crew,
prepare for docking.

- That line will be
the first one on.

We are 10 from breakwater
to port quarter.

How's your train skills?

- Nearly as good as
my haircut.

- We are at three meters on
our port quarter

and we have one meter
left to get to the dock.

Send it.
Stern line is going on now.

That's perfect as we are.

- Bit more.

- Everyone did an amazing job.
- Cool, man.

- Deck crew, deck crew, hannah.

Can you pick up some
provisioning for me, please?

- Copy for deck crew.
- Thank you.

- Oh...

- What?
- They're alive!

So I didn't realize
the lobsters were alive

and I don't wanna kill them.

- Coming up...

- June, sandy.

Communication is my pet peeve.

You must listen
and answer hannah.

- Of course, and I...

- You're gonna feel
the wrath of me.

- Babe, can you at least
put a shirt on for dinner?

[ laughs ]

- so I didn't realize
the lobsters were alive.

- Do you want me
to kill them for you?

- Yeah.

- I don't think it's hard
to cook meat as a vegan.

But these lobsters,
having to ----ing murder them,

can't deal with it!

Put a knife
through their head...

- Yep.

- Come down and
I need them cut...

- In half all the way down...
- Yeah.

- To the end of the tail, yeah?
- Yes.

- Cool.

- I feel so sad for them.

[ gags ]

- I can clean them out for you.
I don't mind.

- Okay. Can you?
- Yeah.

In zimbabwe, we're primitive.

We kill our food,
we eat our food

and we respect
where it's come from.

That one's fred,
that one's chris, that one...

- Stop.

- I gotta go put a shirt on.
- I'm hungry.

- Joao did.

All right, I'm going
to the cabins.

- Okay, thank you.
- Getting hangry.

- Mm, look at that!

Come here and sit on my lap!

- Anastasia, anastasia, hannah.
I'm seating guests.

- Copy.

- Have you tasted it?
- No, dude.

Rich people want to ----ing
eat that fancy sh--,

be my guest.

I'm disgusted
by my entire dinner.

- That's encouraging.
- Yes.

Get 'em out of my sight.

- Oh, my god.

- Your first course
is sea urchin uni

on a bed of cucumber noodles.

- So you don't eat
the outside, right?

- No, you don't eat
the black part.

- That's cucumber.

- I'm good.
- I'm good.

Woo! That was a tough one.

Who put this on
their preference?

- What's for the next course?

- Why aren't these stupid
burners working?

- That was awesome.

- We didn't come here
to be like normal.

- June, June, hannah.

June, June, June,
June, June, hannah.

June, June, hannah.


- Hey, hannah.

- Are you hearing my radio?

- I forgot to put it back in,
so is this not...

- Please try and...
- I know, I know. I know, yeah.

I honestly truly to goodness

don't know what's
going on with my radio.

I have it in,
yes, maybe I'll drop it,

yeah, for sure.

But I don't know why I can't
hear it, but it sucks.

- These ----ing burners
are pieces of sh--.

- Yeah.

- And I can only cook
two at a time.

- Okay. Just start
eating without your friends.

- Just start eating, yeah.

they're gonna be cold.

- Okay.

This is definitely
the no-no on yachts.

Yes, there's an issue
with the burners.

But a super yacht chef would
know how to work around that.

And that's where
anastasia is lacking.

- Run 'em?
- Oh, no garlic butter?

- Oh, yeah, yeah, yes!

- Cool. Thank you.

- And then we'll put more
on the table.

- Oh, sh--.

- Oh!

- Fresh lobster!
- Lobster!

- But we can only cook
two at a time.

So I want you guys
to eat it hot.

- Fran is starving.
- Yes?

- Why don't you give
that to her?

- She's starving.
- You sure?

- Did you see her drool?

- I'm good.
- Yeah, yeah!

- Absolutely.

- We had guacamole.

- Listen, I had
a lot of guacamole.

- Really good.

- Wow, very good.

- Okay.

- This is a food that requires
licking your fingers.

- Yeah.

- And it has the garlic
which is my favorite.

- I just need it
cooked a little more?

- For real?
- Yeah.

- Who's next?

- No, here. I'll wait for randy.

- Can I just get it heated up
just a little bit more?

I'm more like medium.

- No problem.

- And then... Yeah.
Thank you so much.

- You like it chargrilled?

- Uh, the prime.

He just said he wants it
cooked a little bit more.

- How you doing, chica?

- Just want to get this out
and I just want to clean.

- Yeah, that's fair enough.

- I just wanted it
to be perfect.

- Yeah.

- You can run those two?

- Thank you so much.

- Start eating.
Eat, eat, eat.

- I need everything
like super warm, like hot...

- Like off the grill?

- Yeah. I can't eat this.

- How was it?

- I wasn't very happy with
how I was doing things.

I just felt really
like off, you know.

- There's no benefit
of walking out that way.

- Good as it gets?
- Yeah. We're good to stay here.

- Do you wanna [bleep]
off for a bit?

I can crack on doing all this.

- I just need to
sit down for a second.

- Yeah, just go now,

- oh, god, that was horrible.

I just... The lobster.
I can't do it.

- Yeah, it's very hard...

- The lobster really
----ing threw me off.

- Mm-hmm.

- I can't butcher animals.
- Yeah.

Killing animals is
something you need to be able

to do to be a chef.
- Yeah, 100%!

I'm like holy [bleep].

- Okay.

- I'm gonna start cleaning.
Oh, my god.

- Pretty sexy.

- Slap it! Slap it!

[ laugh ]

- [bleep], seriously.

- Hey, don't pitch it!

- I don't know what
to do with it!

- Bedtime!

- Goodnight, everyone!

- Colly wolly?

Are you okay
to do 12 'til 2?

That's right.

- Uh-huh.
- Cool man.

- I just wanted to say
that I rather envy you.

And I think that you're like...

This comes out strange.
But like...

- What's happening here?
- No, no, no.

I just literally just thought,

I'm gonna ----ing tell her

because people don't

They don't say this sh--
enough to each other.

I just feel like
you've used your time

really effectively
in your life.

I know you're
an intelligent strong woman

and I respect that a lot.

- Thank you.
I appreciate that.

It's been tough.

I'm just in my head a lot.

- I don't mean just
in cooking and sh--.

But it just seems like
you've done good things

with your life
and it's good.

- Thanks, man.
- You're welcome.

- I appreciate that a lot.
- You're welcome.

- I think she's just used
to like how we've been.

We're just struggling having
a new person coming in.

I'm really sorry.

I feel really bad.

- No, that's cool, but
just like, it's not necessary.

- Well, I'll never be
a dick to you.

- It's kind of like
a little too windy.

- Okay.

- June, June, sandy.

Hey, good morning.

- Good morning.
- Where's your radio?

- It's charging.

- The chairs
are around the...

Can you put them...
- Oh, yeah. I just vacuumed.

- Can you put those back in?

- Yeah.
- Okay. Thank you.

Can you do that now?
- Yeah, yeah.

- Okay, thank you.

If a crewmember doesn't answer
when you call them on a radio,

that's my pet peeve.

Is this yours?

- Yeah, I put it up
there this morning.

- It's charged.
- Oh, good.

- Listen.

You must listen
and answer hannah.

- Of course, and then...

- You're gonna feel
the wrath of me.

- Coming up...

- How was it?

- I guess their expectations
were a little higher.

- It wasn't five star.

- Promoting anastasia
may have been a mistake.

- You must listen
and answer hannah.

- Of course, and then...

- You're gonna feel
the wrath of me.

- But I promise to goodness,
nothing's coming through.

- We'll trade radios.
- Okay.

- That is gorgeous.
- Thank you.

- This radio, I have
absolutely no problem with.

- Okay.
- You're gonna be taking mine.

- All right.
For today.

- No, for the rest
of the season.

- Oh, thank you.
I appreciate it.

- And you better answer it.

- I've swept and everything

and I've just done the
scuppers down here.

- Oh, I've missed you.

[ chuckles ]

with jack at the moment,
I'm having so much fun with him.

And he's such a cool guy

and I want to
keep getting to know him.

But at the same time,
we haven't even banged yet.


- Good morning.
- Hello.

- How you doing?
- Kind of windy up here.

- Oh, we love it.

- Last night was
----ing annoying.

I am just completely rattled.

I just want the guests to have a
good meal and get off the boat.


- You guys be seated
whenever you like.

- Oh, thank you.
- Okay.

- Dust and salt,
so if you get that off,

then I'll be happy.
- Sweet.

- Let me show you.

Your hair's black,
but your tits are grey.

- Wow.
- Wow!

- Eggs benedict?

- I'm gonna start
passing these around.

- All right.
Let me pass myself one first.

- Okay.

- This plate is hot.

- What side am
I supposed to serve on?

[ laugh ]

- would anybody like anything
besides eggs benedict?

- Morning potatoes.
- Morning.

- You want potatoes?
- Do you have any potatoes?

- I can whip them up, but it's
gonna take about 10 or 15...

- High maintenance.
- I'll wait.

- Yes? Okay.
- High maintenance.

- You know, you can order
whatever eggs you want.

You know that, right?
- Oh, just found that out.

[ laughs ]
- really? No.

- Something I could have
learned three days ago!

- Is that what they wanted?
- I don't know.

- Well, they know
they can order...

- They've been told.

All right.
They've been told?

It's like, no,
we don't tell them.

We ask them.

This is a huge problem for me.

Because I don't want
you walking out...

- It's dirty.

- In front of the
guests like that.

We have uniforms
we have to wear.

- No, I'm just gonna
grab my dirty jacket.

- She's like it's gonna
take 15 or 20 minutes,

and he goes, "I'll wait.
I'll wait."

- they never say no,
so I've learned to cut through.

- Just drink a water.
- Potatoes!

- All right!
Wow, there it is.

- All his.

- What are you making
us for lunch?

- Um, a big old kick
in the ass.

- Man, they cannot wait.

- I'm over it.
I need you to go.

All right, guys.

- Yeah, I know.
Usually, like...

Just crack on.

Get into the routine.

- Still packing?

- All crew, all crew,
let's get into our whites.

- Got everything?

- Looking lovely, mate.

- Hey.
- Hi.

- Hi, cap!

- How was it?

- You want to really
know the truth?

- The only way we improve is if
the client tells us the truth.

- Let me speak with candor.

We've done yachts,
we've done trips.

France has some of
the best foods in the world.

It was good.
It wasn't five star.

So I was just surprised at that.

- So was it
the quality of the food?

- I have to eat food hot.

If not, then I won't eat it.

- When you're a yacht this big,
I guess their expectations

were a little higher.

Like it's if you
were eating

in one of the
best restaurants on shore.

- Yeah. Us americans are
used to big portions.

- I was expecting five star.
This is not five star.

- Maybe promoting anastasia
may have been a mistake.

- Next on "below deck med"...

- Oh, my god!

- Even for south of France,
it's pretty fancy.

- Where's the bathroom?
Sorry, ma'am.

- Suck my toe.

- What the [bleep] is going on?
Where's your ----ing shame?

- Vern is the director
of a highly successful

accounting firm.

- Hey, how you doing?
- Welcome.

- I'm vern.
- How could we not smile?

- Good to meet you.
- How is that?

- It tastes really great.

- There's a hair?

- Did the jet ski
really go over there?

What the [bleep]?

- Joao, if they ride
the jet skis

where they're not supposed to,
we load the jet skis.

I'm irritated.

Go after the jet ski.
Go now.

Joao needs to rein them in.
There's no control.

[ sirens ]
- it's the police!