Below Deck Mediterranean (2016–…): Season 2, Episode 13 - Stew the Right Thing - full transcript

Bugsy's frustration with Hannah reaches critical mass when she calls Hannah out. On the final charter of the season, a former guest returns, this time flanked by six beautiful women who ...

- Previously on

- Previously on
"Below Deck Med"...

[solemn music]

- She told me that
she's not into him whatsoever.

I got all the texts to prove it.

We met before we even
got on the boat.

- Wow.

- We tried to keep
it hush, hush.

♪ ♪

- Yeah.

- Bugs, would you like to do
lead service with these guys?

- I don't mind.
- Can you go and unpack

the starboard forward
cabin for me?

- It's kind of annoying
that, like

we're doing the majority
of the work--

- Oh, you're only
noticing this now?

- You are looking at
the new lead deckhand, Malia.

- I got f---ed out
of something for nothing.

- Let it go!

You can't become
a leader by being a dick.

- Cheers.
both: Cheers!

- You know that Malia's getting
just stupid jealous, right?

- Yeah, I see that.

[lively electronic music]

- [laughs]

- Oh, God, here we go.

- What is going on?

♪ ♪

[foghorns blare]

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

[techno music]

- Yikes.
- Later, skater.

- That a girl.
Get it on you.

- He's like, "Yeah, I know,
you're special.

"But not at all.
You're not f---ing special.

You're disgusting."
- He said that to you?

- Oh, yeah, and I was like,

"You, of all people,
are sucking up to Hannah."

- Why do you care about that?
Wes likes you so much.

- I know.
- If you wanna kiss Wes,

you get the f--- there.


- There were so many
red flags with Adam.

I was so stupid bringing it on.

[hip-hop music]

F--- you, Adam.

Like, this girl's going
for the good guy,

and he totally deserves it.

♪ ♪

- You know what I love
about you?

You've got a good f---ing
sense of humor.

- Okay.
- [laughs]

- One more time for
the cheap seats in the back.

- Is this the Jager Bomb
coming out? [laughs]

Oh, careful.
Whoa, easy, easy, easy.

- Ooh, sh--.
- What the f--- was that?

That a girl. There you go.
- Thank you.

- What Adam and Hannah do,
I could f---ing care less.

- Yeah.
- Wes, we gotta go.

- Where's Adam and Hannah?

- You know where the bar's at.

[playful instrumental music]

- Grey Goose.


- Eww, barf.

Who came up
with that cocktail?

- And f--- you.
- Hm.

- I'm pretty cooked.
- [blows raspberries]

- Oh, Wes, you might not wanna--
- [laughs]

- So where's my popcorn?

- Right up your bum.
- [laughs] Whoo!

- Holy cannoli.

- Yay!
- Hi!

- Everyone thinks you guys
are hooking up, by the way.

- So mission accomplished?

- Just go with it,
just go with it.

- We've already done
our jobs here, I think.

- Make our f---ing drinks.
- Bing bong.

- But didn't--no, no.
I'm sorry.

I can't, I can't

No, no.

I wanna put her to bed,
not take her to bed.

I think the mess
has already been made.

Big difference.

- No.
- You could always--

- [indistinct]
- [laughs]

- What do you want from me?
- Jeez.

- Oh, God! Woman down!
- [groans]

- Oh, my God.
- Hannah, Hannah, are you okay?

- Hey, you alright?
- Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

- Come here. Are you okay?
- Hannah!

- Jeez, Hannah.
- Hannah, what the f--- is that?

I give that an eight.
- That was too much for me.

- Are you gonna make it
in bed okay?

Get to sleep.

Sleep it off...
- Yeah, of course.

[upbeat music]

- You're running away also?

- I'm just taking
the garbage out.

- Sold out to Hannah, huh?

- Yeah, I went for you.
Big mistake.

- You know, you don't have
to be such an asshole

to prove your point.
- Yeah, I think I do.

I finally clicked with Hannah.
We find common ground,

and Malia could not
hate it more.

- Adam, I've never said
anything against you.

I think you're a great guy.
- So why all of this?

Making out with
half the f---ing crew?

Yes, you do.
- Made out with half the crew,

Adam? It was you and Wes.

- You're a liar,
and you blew it.

- And I blew it?
- Go ahead.

You can have her, dude.
It's all good.

- Adam...

- Later, skater.

- You okay?
- No, I'm good.

[solemn music]

♪ ♪

- Okay, night, guys.
Sleep well.

♪ ♪

- [burps]

- [laughs]

- Okay,
you're welcome to get up.

- [indistinct]

- If you fall
out of there, dude.


- Super sneaky.

- I'm gonna sleep
in the crew mess. Night.

♪ ♪

- What are you doing?
- I'm not sleeping in my cabin.

Have you seen the movement
going on in my cabin?

♪ ♪

- That's f---ed up,
plan and simple.

That is why she got
the position.

Do you guys really think
this is professional?

You're kicking Bugs
out of her room.

That's real professional.
- Bugs, sleep in your bed.

- Yeah, Bugs'll.

♪ ♪

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Yep.
[both laugh]

- Tags!
- [chuckles]

Oh, doggone, oh.

♪ ♪

- [giggles]
Don't make me laugh.

I'm just so over
everything, Sandy.

- How can I help?

- I'm done with Hannah's
management skills.

Just nothing runs smoothly,
you know what I mean?

I'm just tired of feeling
like I'm doing everything,

like, everything.

Hannah hasn't really
helped with much.

She's been absolutely
lazy all season.

- Can we send somebody
to check on Hannah

just to make sure she's okay?
- She's my cabin mate,

so she's good, she's good.
- She's okay?

♪ ♪

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- I like the gold.
- I love that.

- You can always count on Bugs.

- Hannah's not set one table
this entire season,

not one table.

- So you're not feeling

and you're doing all the work.
- I don't wanna claim that,

but that's how I feel.

- I would wanna have
a sit-down with Hannah.

- But right at the end
of the season?

- You were really great
at managing your emotions,

so I would hate to see something
trigger it during the charter.

- I just never should've taken
the second stew position,

and that's me speaking honestly.

- I want all the crew to feel
like they can talk to me,

but that doesn't mean
I'm gonna solve their problem.

This is for her to figure out.

All right, honey,
enjoy your day.

- Thank you, you too.

I'll bring your laundry up
when it's done.

♪ ♪

- All righty, Malia,
I've got a list over here

for you to run through
for the day.

We're just gonna start off
with a normal wash-down,

full wash-down, including
a very strong vinegar solution

for doing the hull, with
the blue paints and everything.

My rule's always been,
never hook up with the crew.

If you can think of anything
else, add it to the list.

Being on a boat, you may think
it's unprofessional,

but that's where I live too.
That's my house.

So if I kiss Malia
when no guests are around,

and it's not in front
of the captain's face,

what's wrong with that?

I've got you.
- [laughs]

- Oh, hi.
- Oh, hi.

- How's your bum feel?
- Sore.

- [laughs]
- Sore, sore, sore.

Let's try this again.

- Ooh, you sure
you wanna do that?

[both laugh]

- I don't even remember
coming back to the boat, like...

- When you started slurring
a little bit, I was like,

"Okay, this girl needs
to go to bed."


- Thanks for looking
after me last night. [laughs]

- It was no big deal.

♪ ♪

- Hannah, Adam, and Wes,

meet me in the crew mess
for a preference sheet meeting.

♪ ♪

It's our last charter.
- Thank God.

- Hannah,
what do you think of this?

- Yeah.

- Jerry is a repeat
charter client.

- You might wanna give him
some Dramamine.

Either that or we're gonna have
to shoot him with a flare gun.

- Angie!
- Yes.

- At the end of the night,
we want milkshakes.

- Sure.

- Jerry will be bringing
his good friend, Dean,

a former NFL kicker,

along with some
other lucky ladies.

- Paula's pretty.

- He likes Italian food.

- Favorite's milkshakes.
- "I don't do salads."


My kinda guy.
- "Yes, I've requested

water toys,
if weather permits.

- Here we go.

- Give us a moment, Bobby.
- Mm-hm.

The last time,
it was a bunch of dudes.

- I know, right?
- She looks pretty.

- Oh, Bobby.
- And he's distracted.

- He definitely had some drinks,
and he gets loud and obnoxious,

and just made it
a real pain in the ass for us.

- Hey, listen,
in the yacht world,

we don't get to pick
our clients, they pick us,

so if the guest
is high maintenance,

we provide more maintenance.

- This charter'll be good, bro.
It's our last one.

♪ ♪

- We really need her help today.
We could get so much more done

if we all put in
the same amount of work.

- Oh, I'm sick of
the whole hierarchy thing

being pulled all the time.

- Those flowers should just go
on the bridge deck aft table.

- Oh, right, there we go.
I'll tell Bobby.

He's up there now.
- Thanks, Wes.

- And I should have said
something earlier.

- Just, as third stew,

I really don't have a place
to say anything.

- You do though.
- Of course.

- I want you to stand up
for yourself.

- Okay, yeah.
- Lauren's a people pleaser.

She's scared of Hannah.

and as much as I don't really
enjoy confrontation that much,

she needs to know my feelings.

Okay, let's do this.

- This is terrible--

[upbeat music]

- Bobby and Max, can you guys
meet me on the front deck?

- Copy that.

- All right, well,
I thought about last night.

[smooth jazz music]

- That's real professional.

- I wanna be known first
as a deckhand,

second as... a girl.

You know,
your biggest concern is

if I can keep it professional

without being biased
towards Wes,

and so I think,
if you guys would give me

the opportunity
to show that I can...

- Of course.
You do kick ass

and take names
and do really well.

- Yeah, thank you.
Hopefully, after this talk,

the whole lead deckhand thing
is put to bed,

because if it gets
brought up one more time,

I'm gonna freak out.

Don't give me any more sh--.

- Oh, that's gonna happen.
- Not yet.

- I'm cracking down, boys.
- I still need a hug.

I really appreciate the fact
that Malia came to us.

To me, that shows
that she respects Max and I

as coworkers and friends
and a team.

- All crew, all crew, guests
will be here in 20 minutes.

Let's get into our whites.

[electronic music]

♪ ♪

- Hannah, Hannah, Bugs.

- Go ahead.
- Could I just have a chat

to you before charter?
- Yeah.

- That would be great,
thank you.

[tense music]

I just wanna talk to you

before we go into
our final charter...

- Mm-hm.
- Because I'm feeling, like,

extremely frustrated
from the season.

I feel like I should have come
to you a lot earlier about it,

and it's my mistake
I didn't,

but what I wanted to say
was that I feel this season,

you've been a lousy chief stew.

- Coming up...

- I matched on Tinder

with the charter guest
that's coming.

- Going on a date, Bobby?

- And later...

- Are you gonna say
something to Wes?

- I can't let her
get away with all that.

Dude, the texts go on
and on and on,

days and days and days.

[solemn music]

♪ ♪

- I'm feeling, like, extremely
frustrated from the season,

and I feel this season,
you've been a lousy chief stew.

I just feel like in the interim,
we're not really a team,

and I don't feel like
you're pulling your weight.

- Okay.
- When you are bad at your job,

and you need to be called out,

it's kind of terrifying having
to confront someone about that.

I was really enjoying working
with you in the beginning,

and I don't know
what's happened.

- Yes, you know exactly
what's happened.

- What's that?
- You broke my trust.

They've been messaging
since charter.

- Well, that's when
I lost complete respect.

I mean, you don't hook up
with a charter guest.

- I didn't hook up with him.
- You told me you did.

- He kissed me,
and I pushed him off.

Good night. Jason?

[smooching and moaning]

Oh, my God.

- I mean,
I've got my own opinion on it,

so I just wanted to say

that I really am looking forward

to this last charter,

and, hopefully, we can knock it
out of the ballpark.

- Knock it out of the ballpark.

- Yeah, exactly.

- Okay.
- Okay, thank you.

Do you have anything
you wanna say to me?

- No.
- Okay, thank you.

- Absolutely nothing.

How are you doing, Sandy?
- I'm okay.

- Bugs just had a chat with me
and said that she feels like

she's pulling more weight
than everyone else,

so I wanna try
and give her a break,

so are you happy for me
to do the late shift?

- You got it.
Do nights.

- Luckily for me,
Bugs doesn't pay my paycheck.

It's kind of just like,
"Shoo. Leave me be."

- You know what, that makes
a great chief stewardess.

- Yeah.

- You allow your second
to come to you,

and you're gonna
take up that slack.

- Yeah, exactly.

- That's why you're
a chief stewardess.

- Thanks, Sandy.

- Oh, wait.
This isn't real.

- What?

- I matched on Tinder with
the charter guest that's coming.

- Oh, yeah, boy.
- Stop it.

- She looks pretty.

- Show us the photos.

Yeah, I want to see
what she's like.

- So--
- Oh, my.

- Oh, my God.
She's a weapon, man.

- Wow.

- Get on, brother.

- And she's a charter guest?
That should be interesting.

- [laughs]
- Bugs, Bugs, Hannah?

Can you just pop to the main
saloon for me for one sec?

- Yeah, copy. What's up?

- I just wanted to give you
the heads up.

- Uh-huh.
- I do apologize if you feel

like you've been taking
on more work than everyone else,

so I'm gonna do lates
this charter--

- Okay.
- And you can go back on mids.

- Okay.
- Okay?

- That's got nothing to do with
it, but, yeah, that's fine.

I don't care
what shift Hannah's on.

She just needs to work
on that shift.

- Perfect.

Thank you.

- All crew, all crew,

guests will be arriving
in five minutes.

- Ah, one more time.

- [laughs]
- Look at the size of that boat.

- Six girls. Two guys.
solid ratio.

- [laughs]
- Hello.

- Hey, I'm your captain, Sandy.

- You're the captain?
- Yes.

- Not quite what I was
expecting, but even better.

- Jerry.
- My man.

- How you doing?
Good seeing you again.

- It's been a while.

- I know.
- Hi, Jerry.

- I remember you.
- I'm Bobby. Nice to meet you.

- Nice to meet you.
- Paula, to me, uh, I mean,

she definitely--uh...

[slow, dreamy music]


- Welcome to
motor yacht "Sirocco."

- All right.
- Hannah's gonna show you

through the boat,

and after that we're
gonna get underway.

- Want us to take our shoes off?
- Please.

- Oh, my God, I wore
the stupidest socks today.


- Well, if I remember correctly,

this will be one of your
favorite spots, the bar.

- Every one of those girls
is gorgeous.

- That girl's ass
is definitely fake.

- Oh, you probably
won't be worrying about

if it's fake or not
when it's in his face.


- So this is the master suite.

Through here we've got a nice,
big walk in wardrobe.

- Ooh.
- This is awesome.

- Any of you guys want
to get right in here,

you're welcome to.

- So it's very standard
in the industry

for owners or charter guests
to bring on girls.

There was one time a yachtie
escort tried to get me fired,

but she didn't quite realize
that I deal

with this man's wife
and children.

He's really not going to be
picking you over me.

I'll take you down and show you
the rest of the cabins.

- Oh, look, you guys
are all in the basement.

This is an African safari room.

- It is, isn't it?

- Oh, God, sorry.

- Yeah, we did.
- That's okay.

I think they went that way.

- So the three rooms
are all queens.

- Yes. If you guys work out
what cabins you're in,

then we can
sort out the luggage

and get it sent
down here for you.

- Okay, yeah.

- And let me top off that
empty glass of yours.

- Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
I want a milkshake.

- Deck crew, deck crew.
Okay, change into reds.

♪ ♪

- Stay there.

- Full of nonsense.

It's like we've got
a restraining order.

- Bart, Bart. When you can
will you start the mains?

- Yes, start up
the main engines, Bart.

♪ ♪

- All right, Captain, we're good
to go at your command.

- One last time.

- I'd like to go bow to stern.

- All clear.

- All lines are in.
You're free to move at will.

♪ ♪

- Dean, what's wrong
with this picture right now?

- I feel like this is a beauty
contest, and we're the judges.

- Yes.

- [laughs]
- Let's play that game again.

- The heads up one?
- Yeah, I love it.

- Let's check out her Instagram.

- That's her?
- Mm-hmm.

- Damn, she's pretty.
- I think the only position now

Bobby wants to be in instead
of lead deckhand is horizontal.

- Those are fake.
- I don't think

there's anything
real about that girl,

including her nose, her lips--

- Yeah, it's--
- Her hair.

- Wes, drop
the starboard anchor.

[chains rattling]

- All right, Cap, that's
five shackles on starboard.

- All right, we're good.

♪ ♪

- Do you need anything
to the bin, Adam? No?

- I'm good, thanks.

- Seven years on,
I've earned my dues.

I don't need to clean
toilets anymore.

'Cause I did it for six years.

If she wants to see me
grafting hard,

then I will graft hard

just to get under her skin
that little bit more.

- Plane diving. Plane dive.
Nose dive. Sky dive.

[bell dings, girls laugh]

[pepper mill grinding]

- We're so close.

If I can just keep my head
out of the clouds,

the Wes and Malia clouds,

I'll probably be able
to get through this.

- Honking, talking and--
- Twerking.

- Twerking.

- Are we ready to be seated?

- Yes.
- Come on, girls. All right.

- So I'll grab that.

[all gasp]

- [laughs]

- Come on.

- Are you okay?

- One of the legs
is a little short.

- I was gonna
pick up the--this.

- Are you ready?
- Yes.

- Drunk girls on a boat, yeah.

♪ ♪

- Okay, so this here
is a tuna poke,

and then we're got
a Mediterranean salad,

and a pasta salad with lemon.

- Good food, good meat,
good Lord, let's eat.

- When do the milkshakes
come, Hannah?

- Whenever you want them, Jerry.

- Could I have
a chocolate milkshake?

- You can have whatever
you want, princess.

- Thank you.

I would like
a chocolate milkshake, please.

- Hey, you need me
to get in there?

- Yeah, go on in, boy.

- Hey, that's why we make
a good team.

- [laughs]

- I don't want the crew
to think

I'm just this crazy,
aggressive man.

Like, no.

I just genuinely liked someone

and was told
that they liked me back.

Like, I can't get it
out of my mind.

All I can think about
is I got played.

I got played hard.

- Coming up...

- I woke up today
feeling stupid

about this whole
f---ing Malia thing.

- The texting.

- The texting was like
minutes after

this little session
in the wheelhouse.


- You ate all your food.

- We didn't do much damage
on this, did we?

- No, I wasn't
crazy about it.

I don't like raw fish.

I don't like
salad-based products.

I don't like
mayonnaise-based products.

- [whispers indistinctly]
- What's that?

- What's up?

- This isn't for me.

- Oh, God.

Well, what do you feel like?

- Um... so she wants
some peanut butter toast.

- For you?

- I'll have
a strawberry milkshake, yeah.

- Okay.
- Okay, cool.

- Primary charter guest
wants a strawberry milkshake,

and another girl
wants peanut butter toast

and a chocolate milkshake.

- Okay.

- Adam really hasn't looked
at the preference sheet,

but at the same time, my heart's
kind of breaking for him

because Malia has done
a number on him,

so the last thing
he needs is me coming in

and giving him a hard time.

- Look what's
coming there, princess.

- [gasps]
Thank you so much.

- Oh, this is good.

Mm-hmm. Wow.

I don't know about yours,
but mine's really good.

- Do you want some?

- I want to see you guys
both sip on the straws

at the same time.

- Cheers.
- That's beautiful.

That's a beautiful milkshake.

- That's really tasty, actually.
- Yep.

- Recovery?

- He said it tastes delicious.
- Excellent.

From hero to zero,
then from zero to hero, huh?

- If I fall in the ocean,
that's okay.

- Well, you never know
what's in there.

Could be a shark.

- There are no sharks
in this ocean.

- Are you sure?
- We don't know.

- You never know.

- Where did Bobby go?

♪ ♪

- I like it.

- Oh, thank you.

- It's a little chilly out.

- I would love to get on top
of that mountain and just yodel.

- Hey, Bobby!
- Hey!

So I got something to tell you.

- What's that?

- I matched with
one of the girls

on a dating site
the other night.

- No way. Which one?

- Paula.

- Oh, my goodness.
- [laughs]

- Wow, that's funny.

Oh, you guys, you guys,

you guys,
here's what we're gonna do.

let's set up a little
private table out here.

When dinner time comes,
I'm gonna go, "Paula, come here.

Your Tinder date
is waiting for you,"

and then bring you out here.


Yes, we are gonna
so do that.

We'll see if you can close
the deal this time.

- Here's the challenge.

Whoever can go up there and kiss
her first, wins 100 bucks.

- No.

- He wins.

He has got way more
game than you do.

- Ha-ha!


- Bobby, you have five hours
to get ready, you better start.

- Oh, I know,
I got to look pretty.

- Bugs, Bugs, Hannah.

I'm just gonna turn
over this laundry.

If you need me to come up,
just let me know.

- Oh, okay, perfect.

I'm not gonna complain

because Hannah's
finally working,

but where were you
five charters ago?

Where were you the whole season?

- Hey, can we be cool
these last three days, please?


It's okay, I'm just
making sure you're okay.

- Yeah, I'm fine.
- I want things to be cool.

- There's seriously, like,
48 hours left.

- Yeah.

- There's nothing
we could really do

to ruin this
at this point.

I couldn't possibly
be more hurt.

I'm having a hard time

why I owe Malia
any amount of respect.

I appreciate you
saying something.

- Do you guys want a shot?
- I do.

- Here comes Jerry.

- Open sesame.

- You press the button,

Push it again.
Oh, there you go.

- I was like,

"Open sesame."
- Oh, you guys--

You guys haven't got
your bathing suits on yet?

- We were waiting for you.
- You guys going in the hot tub?

- Cheers.

♪ ♪

- [laughs]

- There you go.

- Look at that bum.

- Here we are.

I used to be a cheerleader
in the NFL.

I've seen many old dudes
hit on young women.

- Ese, you need to take
a Boomerang of me.

- Tell me when.
- [grunts]

- These women, they're just here
to party on a yacht

and take tons of selfies.

Yeah, free trip to Croatia.

- Malia...

- Okay.

- Okay.

- I got slapped
this morning.

I got told I haven't been
pulling my weight,

and I'm a bad chief stew.

- By whom?
- Bugs.

- Like that was necessary.
- Yeah.

I think she, like,
kind of doesn't understand.

I know she's been
a chief stew before,

but doing these charters
back to back to back to back,

there is a lot of stuff
that I have to do, like,

on my phone,
and with provisions,

and organizing stuff
and everything so.

- Or you're playing
travel agent.

You're doing something
for the crew.

- Yeah, exactly.
I haven't really had

any complaints from the guests,
which are really--

or Sandy.


It's just weird.

- Anyway.

- You okay, babe?

You're awfully quiet.
- Yeah.

I woke up today
feeling stupid

about this whole
f---ing Malia thing.

- Don't you think she should be
the one that's feeling stupid?

- As it turns out,
minutes after

this little make-out session
in the wheelhouse,

Malia and I were doing
some pretty heavy texting.

I mean, we were communicating.

- To be making out with Wes,

and literally,
minutes later be texting Adam,

and then trying to make out like
Adam's the one that's crazy?

She's fricking taking it
to the next level.

- You read some of this stuff,
and it's like serious

potential relationship talk.

- The texting?
- Oh, yeah.

Talking about the future

and "I miss you,"
and I mean, strong words.

You think you know someone.

- Well, I'm sorry you had
a sh-- time.

- I know. It sucks.

- [whispers] Two more days.
- Yeah, I know.


- Coming up...

- I can if you want.
- Really?

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- This is gonna be so good.

- You stand over here.

When I come out, you walk
over here with a candle.

- No, decorate this
little table all romantic.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Decorate that little table.

- All right.

♪ ♪

- What are you doing
for the main then?

- I was gonna do bass.

They've got--pretty much
every person wrote bass.

This lady'll
have chicken instead.

- Okay.
- Hey, Paula.

Can I talk to you
for a sec?

Come here.

Oh, I mean, out here.

- Well, hello.
- Hi.

- This is Bobby.
You matched on Tinder.


And if this is a big hit,
Captain Sandy

is capable of performing
a marriage right on the boat.

- Oh, God.

- So enjoy your little date.

- This is actually
really cool, Jerry.

Awkward, but cool.

- Well, I didn't know
you were on the boat.

- That was the last thing
I was expecting.

- Me too.

- Bobby is like--

[mouths words]

- What's the story
here with everybody?

- Me and Elisa
live together in Australia.

- And what brought you
to Australia, school?

- University, yes.

- Cool. Little smarty pants.

- [laughs]
- Not this guy.

When I got out of high school,
I went straight to fire school.

I was a fireman.
I was a fireman for ten years,

and then a friend of mine
was like,

"You should try yachting
and try this for a while."

- And here you are, and match
people on Tinder in it?

- Yeah.
- That sounds like fun.

- Oh, my God.

- What do you say we go
to the table,

and let's sit down for dinner.
Let's go!

- Are we missing one?
- We are.

She's on a Tinder date.

- Bobby, Bobby.
- Go ahead.

- Do you want me to bring
you out some game?

Or are you all right?
- I think I'm doing all right.

- And remember,
don't look at her breasts.

- Bobby, the guests
are all seated for dinner,

so wrap it up.

- Your dinner is ready,

so we should reconvene
this a little later maybe?

- Okay.
- All right?

- Okay, sounds good.

- I'm sorry I was keeping
you guys from all the fun here.

- Well, you guys
enjoy your dinner.

- Okay, I'm just gonna
do wine service.

- Okay.

- Did he take you for
a tour of the crew cabin?

No, he didn't?

- Do you get one later?
- Maybe.

- You can roll.

- So for the starter tonight,
we have pan seared jumbo shrimp

with walnut romesco
and fresh oregano.

- This food is delicious.
- It is.

- It's amazing.
- This one looks heavy, bro.

- You got it, Wes.

- I'd like to thank you all for
coming on my little adventure.

all: Cheers.

- Cheers.
Thanks for the invite.

This has been
a really wonderful trip.

- That you eat with a fork?
- That's not soup.

It's just a purée.

- I popped one down anyway.

- Just in case
they want to drink it.

I've noticed that Hannah
has been stepping up a lot.

I think Bugsy
confronting Hannah,

although she won't admit it,

definitely made her
try to prove herself

a little more this charter.

- That one's ready.
That one's ready.

This one's ready.

- For your second course,
we have caramelized asparagus

with yellow carrot
on an asparagus puree. Enjoy.

- This tastes good.

- I like the carrot.
- Very good.

- I'm so happy
there's one day left.

It's very interesting
that I've been taken off lates

and put back on middles
because Hannah said,

"You think I'm not doing enough?
I'm gonna do lates."

- You can go back on mids.

- Okay.
- Okay?

- That's got nothing to do
with it, but, yeah, that's fine.

- Yeah, she was doing lates

and she still wasn't
doing anything.

- Yeah, it's ridiculous.

- I think Hannah uses her rank
to delegate

and get away from
doing things that,

you know, normally a chief stew
would share in.

- We've got two days left.

That is not enough time
to redeem yourself.

- She's lazy.

- I need a transfusion.

- Paula's liking this dish.

What do you like better,
the dish or Bobby?

- That's a hard question.
- That's a hard question?

Who else is on Tinder
in Croatia?

- Is Bugs in cabins?
- Yes.

- Yeah.
Doesn't surprise me.

- Oh, hey, Bugs.

- Hi, Adam. How's it going?

- Feel like I haven't seen you
in forever.

- [laughs]
"Forever and a day."

- You might get a good night's
sleep tonight, Adam.

That would be unusual.
- [laughs]

- I'll take
another beer, please.

- Perfect.

- I have to go
take a study break.

- Oh, that's right.
You have to go do your thing.

- Yeah.
- You gonna help her?

- Yeah, and go help her
by sleeping next to her.

I'm out!

- What are you guys doing?

- We are looking
for the other girls.

- Yeah, thank you for
your awesome service tonight.

- It's a pleasure, Jerry.

- He's like so obsessed with me.
- You off to bed?

- Yeah.
- Okay.

You have a good sleep, hey?

- I will.

- Full moon in two days' time?

- So our last day on the boat
is a full moon.

- Yeah.

- People are gonna go crazy.

- People are already
going crazy.

It is a little hard
keeping my distance from Wes

and trying to not flirt,

because I don't want
to be unprofessional.

- How do you know what
your WhatsApp number is?

- That's your WhatsApp number.
- Okay.

- Why, who are you giving your

WhatsApp number
to, your Tinder date?

- She just asked for it.

- Texting on charter.


You know my opinion
on that.

I would feel like
a complete hypocrite

if I let this slide with Bobby
and not with Hannah.

This, again, is a big no-no.

- Can't beat 'em,
join 'em, right?



What's going on?

- Oh, God.
- What?

- She just said,
"Where's your room at?

Come to ours."
And then she sent me a picture.

Oh, my God, that's not fair.

- Bobby's been looking for love
this whole charter season,

and he's got nowhere.

Listen, you go to do
what you got to do.


[both laugh quietly]

- F---.

My will, my will's weak.

I must be frickin' strong.

- Listen to me, listen to me.
Serious talk.

All the sh--
we give Hannah for doing it,

for hooking up with Jason,

I will not give you
when you go down there

and meet Paula,
because that is worth it.

- Oh, sh--.

All right,
I'll be back.

- Make me proud.

- She is testing me.

- Coming up...

- I mean, read that.

3:45 a.m., that watch.

The girl is a f---ing liar.

[hip-hop music]

♪ ♪

- How are you guys doing?
It smells really good in here.

- Like food?
- No, it smells like--

beautiful ladies.

At this moment,
I really would like to do

some unprofessional things.

Well, I guess I'll just
wish you guys good night.

I think we got
a fun day tomorrow.

- [laughs]

- And it was really nice
meeting you.

Stay professional,
stay professional.

- Good night.

- Okay, I'll see you
in the morning. It will be fun.

- Okay, good night.

- Sleep tight.


Okay, I'm going to bed.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Good morning.

- Good morning, Sandy.

- Did you sleep?
- Oh, yeah.

- Apparently I was snoring.

- Oh, really?

- This is such
a yummy breakfast.

- Nice.
- I want to go on a hike.

- What's a hike mean?

- Like a walking adventure.

- Yeah, we might
get lost, though.

- How did it go with Paula?

- I don't want to hear it.

- [laughing]
And she--her friend's in bed.

I was standing there,
and I was f---ing,

it reeks of hot babes.

- [laughs]
- And--

- What about your date
last night?

- Yeah, he came to say
good night last night.

- Oh.

- It was pretty cute.

Girls: Aww.

- F---!
- [laughs]

- Are you captain
this morning, Hannah?

- Yes, I am.

- So is it supposed
to get sunny today?

- Partly sunny.

- We're off to a start.
Are we here till tomorrow?

- No, we can't stay here.

Unpredictable weather is part
of being in the Mediterranean.

So this afternoon
we have great weather,

so we're gonna go out
have some fun,

but we definitely have
to be back

at the dock
before the weather hits.

- Just round up the peeps?
- Sounds perfect.

- All right, thank you.
- Pleasure.

- Putting the toys in.

[mechanical whirring]

- [whistles]

[air hissing]

I think around 5:00 a.m.

- Do you need me
to arrange transport

to the airport for you?

- Yeah, it would be nice.
Yes, please.

- Yeah, of course.

- That would be great.
Thank you.

- All right, let's go.

- I can't believe
we're doing this.


- Oh!

- Oh, I landed on my ass.

- Soft landing, then.

- Come on. Girls on trampolines!
Let's go!

Up and down, up and down.

[girls laugh, scream]
- Ooh.

- All right, let's go for
the quick ski before lunch.

- Sounds good.

[engine purring]

♪ ♪

- [whispers]

Can I borrow a can opener?

- Maybe.

- Thank you.

- I don't know.


- Hey, what are you inside
for, huh?

- You'll never see, like,
a sad person on a Jet Ski.

- I can if you want.
- Really?

- Yeah.
Whatever they ask for,

I guess that's my job
to make it happen.

- We can go for a little drive.
- You got it.

- I'll wait for you.
- Okay.

[pan sizzling]

- Are we just about
to have lunch, Adam?

- That's a really good idea.

- Thanks, honey.

- I'm just gonna wipe this
and set the table.

- Do you know how hard
tomorrow's gonna be?

We've got guests leaving
at 4:00 tomorrow morning.

Your girl.

- Well, Bobby should
probably be on that.

- All righty. If you need me
I'll be in the bridge.

- Where are you going?

- I got sh-- to do.

It may look bad to other people,

but I really have been
wanting to meet a girl here,

and if it ends up
being this charter guest,

well, I'm gonna do it.

All righty.

- You going on a date, Bobby?

- Yeah, that's what I thought.

- Oh, boy.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Everybody fell asleep.


♪ ♪

- How was it?
- It was awesome.

- I'll take that from you.

- See you later.
- Whoa.

- Is that date number two?
Things are going well, bro.

- Date number two.
- Get on.

- Oh, them lips.

- Oh, f--- yeah.

♪ ♪

- All right, time
to bring up the transom door.

Last time, guys.
Let's not break anything.

- Whoo!
- All right, Cap,

transom is closed,
and the toys are loaded.

- Good job. Let's pull anchor
and get underway.

♪ ♪

Pull up the starboard
anchor, please.

- Shackle number two on deck.

[metallic clanking]

- Whoo!

Done with anchors.

♪ ♪

- All crew, all crew.

This is our last boat ride,
so I hope you get a visual.

- I feel like a war veteran
returning from World War ll.

- Are you getting hungry?
- Yeah, we're ready to eat.

- We're gonna be starting
without Paula.

- Okay, no problem.

- Waiting for Bob's girlfriend?

- No, we're gonna eat
without her, Jerry said.

- Well, she's probably
already eaten in the sea

with Bobby--his face.

- Did they make out?
- Yeah, and I can't believe

he would be,
like, a hypocrite about it.

- It's like he's never seen
a girl with a nice ass before.

Which he has.


How do you know,
Bugs, you saw?

- I might have played
a little trick on him.

- Hey, that's
all that matters.


- He's not the brightest crayon
in the box.

Mmm, chop salad.

- Those two can go.

- Tomato soup.

One with no mayo.

- The soup is so good.
I love it.

- So, like, I had to think
about what you said yesterday,

and it's really f---ing
annoying me.

I feel really bad
for both Wes and Adam

because I feel like Malia was
definitely leading them both on,

and that can really
mess with a guy's head.

- I can only imagine every
sneaky little corner they had,

you know, because that was me.

I was the one
sneaking around the corners

giving her kisses too.

- [sighs]

Are you gonna say
something to Wes?

- Yeah, I'm gonna have
to mention something.

I can't let her get away
with all that, you know?

- No.
- More importantly,

I can't let him--

- Get taken
for a ride like that.

- Yeah.

Even if the conversation
doesn't go well,

at least I can say my piece,
and I can sleep better at night

knowing that I tried to put
an end to someone's charade.

- Yeah.
- Yeah, I was engaged once,

and it--it didn't work out

because I was
never exposed to her family.

She was Middle Eastern,
and it was a cultural clash.

I was a secret,
and I'm a secret again,

and it's just eating me alive.

♪ ♪

- Last one for the season, bro.

All right, Cap, you've got
no traffic astern of you

or to your port side.

One meter till touching fenders
on starboard quarter.

- He's a cute little linesman,
isn't he?

- Hello.

- All right, Cap,
we've got all lines ashore

and tightened to the dock.

- Well done on the lines.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- If there are two sides
to the story,

then they both need to be said.

He doesn't know
the truth about her.

I've got four weeks'
worth of texts to prove it,

and I have a little bit
of an obligation,

at this point,

to make sure he finds out.

Hey, man.
It's been on my mind.

I mean, I'm sure you've noticed,
dude, I've been pretty blue.

- Yeah.
- Basically,

ever since our little scuffle
in Dubrovnik.

- Yeah.
- You know, while I apologize

and everything,
it's deeper than that.

I do wish you two the best

whatever happens.

Seriously, honest to God.

But that said,
you need to know

that the girl
is a f---ing liar.

The night that you two
did the wheelhouse thing,

I did some cross referencing.

Dude, she was minutes--
I mean, read that.

3:45 a.m., that watch.
I mean, this f---ing--

Dude, the texts go
on and on and on.

Days and days and days.

♪ ♪

- Next time on the season finale
of "Below Deck Mediterranean"...

- I'm tired of waiting
for these girls.

We're waiting for dinner,

Hannah, can you have the captain
come talk to me, please?

- You think you and Lauren
worked harder

than me this season?

- Yeah.

- Here we go again, drama.
- Lauren.

- Be honest about
what you've been saying.

- Let's be honest.

The only person I'm gonna talk
to after this charter is Hannah.

- And that's fine.
- Wes, before we go, man,

I just got to say
one last thing.

Malia and I had
a physical relationship.

- I knew Adam from before.

- Anything happen then?

- This is why you have
these boundaries.

You can't mix business
with pleasure.

I've had a lot of conversations
with a lot of people,

and they all keep trying to,
like, warn me this person's had,

like, two relationships
on the boat the whole time and--

- Well, I want to say sorry too.
Because it's--

either way,
you deserved better.

I guess no good-bye.

- It wasn't meant to be.

- F--- off.