Below Deck Mediterranean (2016–…): Season 1, Episode 5 - My Big Fat Greek Threesome - full transcript
- Previously on
"Below Deck Med."...
- There's feeding going on here.
- Thanks for looking out.
- Do you got a little something
- for Bryan?
- Yeah.
- Bryan's definitely my type.
- He's a little surfer boy.
- He's fit.
- No, I just
- think you can do it.
- Thanks, Mr. Robinson.
- I think Tiffany's
- really cute.
Yeah, she's weird, but she's
smart, and I like that.
I haven't met
anyone like you.
- We got a lot of sháá
to take care of.
- Okay.
- Explained to you
- in every single fáááing way
We possibly could
why that's not okay,
and now you went and did it
behind our backs.
- Now you've got two strikes
- against you.
Three, you're definitely
out of here.
Hannah's sweet,
but the chief stew and chef
is the hardest
relationship to work.
- I don't know.
I haven't decided yet.
- I'm going to bed.
- Me, too, let's go.
Get in there.
- [laughs]
[foghorn blows]
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
- Let's go to my mattress.
- All right. It's all good.
- Sexual love is in the air.
You're absolutely crazy.
- [laughs]
- What the fááá?
- Oh, fááá.
- All right, listen,
I'm not in fáááing high school.
Get the fááá out of here,
both of you, all right?
I'm serious.
- Yeah, I'm fáááing serious.
- Okay.
- Get the fááá out of here.
This isn't a fáááing
frat house,
I don't' want to be
part of his good time.
I don't want to be
in the room with his good time.
I just think he should
bugger off and go
and good-time somewhere else.
- You too, bro.
♪ ♪
- Oof.
- Nice.
- What are you doing
- in my dungeon?
- I'm trying
- to find my underwear.
Oh, here we go.
- I know that Bryan's
- a frat boy,
And flirting is
what they're good at.
- Want to trade massages?
- Yeah, sure.
- Hey, Tiffany, um,
both of you,
can I just say something?
I think I overreacted,
- and I shouldn't of sworn
- and yelled and...
- Oh, no, no, no.
- I could've handled it better.
- Totally chill, brother.
- Look, water
- under the bridge, okay?
- Yeah, absolutely.
- I... you know,
It's just kind of...
- There's
- a lot nicer places to go.
- Promise you.
- Yeah, I agree.
- Hint, hint,
hot tub, double beds.
- I don't want
- to clean those places.
- Just not in that little hovel
that I happen to share.
I'm a big believer in sex.
- If anyone's gonna get it
- on with Tiffany,
It's gonna be me,
really, isn't it?
- Cheers, Ben.
- So did you guys
do any thing last night.
- You just make
- out or anything?
- We just started snuggling
- and like, getting comfortable,
And then Ben came in.
- Damn it.
- I know. It's okay.
There's one thing I got.
Time.
♪ ♪
- Bryan. Bryan. You, Hannah,
and Ben to the bridge.
♪ ♪
Looks like what we have here
is a one-day charter.
- That's perfect.
- Kenny and Brian
are best friends.
Apparently these guys
are Oklahoma millionaires.
- Obviously they're going to be
- used to the five-star treatment.
- I don't know much
- about Oklahoma.
I saw the Broadway.
That's about it.
- So we've got a beach picnic.
Big water sports people.
Snorkel and play
with water toys.
- Awesome.
- "A country-themed dance party
With line dancing
and two-stepping."
- I'm sure
- you're really familiar
With all of that.
- Oh, yeah.
- It would be cool
- if we could get, like,
A big thing of...
- What?
- A hay bale.
- A hay bale, yeah.
- What is it?
Hays of bale?
- Oh, I'm going
- here already.
- Nice.
- Thanks a bunch.
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
- Thanks, Captain.
- We have the preference sheet.
- Dump it out on me, baby.
Let's see it.
- Millionaires from Oklahoma.
- [gasps]
- Has his own plane.
- Yeah, yeah, they're rich,
and they want to have
a country themed dance party.
- Oh.
- Bow-ba-ba-bow-ba-
ba-bow-ba-ba.
- They're gonna
- be expecting topnotch service.
- Exactly.
- Yeah.
- We learned a lot
- from our last charter.
- This charter, let's
- have a good one,
So watch your step Danny.
- You know?
- I got you,
- And I'm gonna
- do good for you guys.
- Daniel's on very,
- very thin ice.
- If he doesn't flip the script
- and start acting the way
That I want him to,
he could be fired real quick.
- So yeah, that's it,
- y'all.
- Sounds good.
- Let's do it, baby.
♪ ♪
- I've got a five... four feta
- and five simi.
- Is that enough?
- Huh?
- I've got...
What are you laughing at?
- I thought you said "semi."
You did?
[laughing]
- How old are you?
Seriously.
- Two?
- Ben definitely gives off
mixed messages.
- If you like me, then you just
- need to say it,
Otherwise just be honest
instead of playing
games like in school.
- 13?
- Old enough to get a semi.
13, yeah, there you go.
- Gross.
- Ugh.
[laughs]
- How's it going?
- Hi.
- The windows look great,
- but let's see
- If we can't do it faster.
- Cool?
- Okay.
- All right, thank you.
Daniel-son, did you see
the spots on the stairs
I was talking about right here?
- Okay, all the way... almost
- all the way down the stairs.
- Then look at on top here?
- Yeah.
- And there's this.
And I specifically
pointed that out.
- I need to get
- on Bryan's good side.
I just got
to be that "yes" man.
- See these railings?
- Had to hit them again.
They're super salty, dude.
- [sighs]
- It sucks so bad.
♪ ♪
- Can you pass me
the honey, honey?
- Tiff and I, we're just kind
of going with the flow,
and if we have an opportunity
to take it to the next level,
I don't think I'd stop.
- Hey, can you hand me
- a little spoon?
- Oh, Jesus.
- Tiff.
- Captains are supposed
- to work inside.
- You're not a captain,
- are you?
[upbeat banjo music]
- Deck crew,
- we have provisions.
- Hello.
These our hay bales?
- Bobby. Bobby.
- It's Julia.
- I just love the way
she says my name.
- Oh, my God.
- Go ahead.
- Julia could tell me
- to scrub toilets all day
Long with that accent,
and I'm on it.
They weren't joking.
- No, Hannah's on it.
- About to have a ho
down over here.
- All crew.
- All crew.
Heads up. No smoking
on the aft deck.
There's hay on the aft deck.
- Oh, my Lord.
This is gonna make a mess.
- Thank you so much.
Aah!
My hay's here.
- Your hay is here.
- How fáááing cool is that?
- I'm not looking forward
- to the clean up.
- Now we just need to learn
- how to line dance.
- Hey, baby.
- You got sháá all over you now.
- It's all good, brother.
- I'm trying with him,
but at the same time,
my bank account
is running low
on patience with Danny.
- We need cowboy hats.
- I'll work something out.
♪ ♪
[rock music]
- Okay, looking good.
Looking good.
- You want me to start detailing
the windows on the bridge deck?
- I think Jen
- already did that.
- Did you, Jen?
- Sure.
- I think Jen's come
- pretty far.
She's picking up the slack
that we're missing from Daniel,
and I appreciate her attitude.
Good, good, good.
Thank you.
- Julia and Tiffany,
can I have a minute?
So basically
what we're gonna do,
Julia and me
on the beach picnic,
and then you here
pulling every thing
for dinner tonight
with the decorations
which it can be very obvious
it's a country theme.
I've been sipping rosé
in the south of France
for the past five years,
so I must admit, not a lot
of experience in country,
so I'm gonna turn to Tiffany
on this one 'cause
she seems
a bit country bumpkin.
- What about
- doing the placemats out of hay,
Like scatter them about?
No?
- I'll figure something out.
- Yeah?
- Yeah, and what
are we wearing tonight?
- There's nothing more country
- than Daisy Dukes in my eyes.
- And what are we doing
- around the bottom half?
- Daisy Dukes.
- What are they?
- Short-shorts.
- Jean shorts?
- Like denim shorts.
- Really?
- I don't want to be
- in short-shorts
- In front of the...
- Do you know what I mean?
And them creeping,
it's... Ugh.
- Okay, but let's try
and pull it out of a hat.
- All crew.
- All crew.
- Guests arriving. Make sure
- you're in your whites please.
♪ ♪
- Clip this on your back.
♪ ♪
- Okay, gang,
they're walking on the boat.
And here we go.
- Coming up.
- Your head is not
- where it needs to be.
- You got your tampon
- up your pussy right now, bro.
Take it out.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Okay, gang,
- they're walking on the boat.
- Looks like three levels
- of party.
- I know nothing about Oklahoma,
but I'm guessing they speak
kind of slow like this.
- Greetings.
- How're you doing?
- Welcome aboard. Mark Howard.
- Captain.
- Nice to meet you.
- Bryan.
- Ken.
- Nice to meet you, Ken.
- I'm Amber.
- Hi, Amber.
- Nice to meet you.
- Julia. Nice to meet you.
- "I like waffles and bacon."
Like, it's kind of like that.
- Well, welcome
- aboard the "Ionian Princess."
- Hannah's gonna take you
- around the yacht,
- And we'll get you taken care of.
- Sounds great.
♪ ♪
- Okay,
- so this is our sundeck.
- Beautiful.
- Got a Jacuzzi.
- Have to use that later.
- Yeah.
- Pretty amazing.
- Look at this thing.
It's a fáááing tank.
Yep, I got it.
- This is the main saloon.
- Oh, this is gorgeous.
- How long
- have you been stewing?
- Six years.
- Like babysitting?
- We're not babysitting
Russian billionaires.
- Best thing that's coming
out of Russia is strippers.
♪ ♪
- So we'll start
- in the master.
- Better go check out
- the bathroom.
- Yeah, 'cause
- that's what matters.
- Wow.
- It's beautiful. See the swan?
- Yeah.
- If you need any thing,
- just come find me.
- Okay. All right.
- Okay?
- Once everybody's in position,
- let me know.
- Cap, we're ready to go.
- Bobby, you can release lines
- whenever you're ready.
♪ ♪
Bowline line one is in.
- Bow to port.
- Jen, slack this spring.
Beautiful.
- Number two bowlines
- are pulled in.
- Okay, Captain,
- all lines are free.
♪ ♪
- Okay, gentlemen
and ladies, good job.
- Bobby, you just want to help
hold both of the lines here?
- You can throw some of them
- in the locker.
- What's going on with this one?
This is Danny's?
- Yeah.
- What the fááá is this?
It's just like, "Oh, my God,
are you kidding me?"
♪ ♪
- Hi.
- How you going?
- About time for a drink.
- Ooh.
- What kind
- of vodkas do you have?
- We have vanilla, citron,
mandarin, and pear.
- Can I have a mandarin
on the rocks?
- I'll have pear.
- Sure.
- Okay, thank you.
- Pleasure.
♪ ♪
- Bobs,
you make me smile.
- I'm glad.
- Then I'm doing my job.
- You do.
At home I've got a brother,
and my best friend is a guy,
and I have a laugh with anyone.
Little ones.
- I don't know.
- Bobby is just my mate.
- He's just a 6'4" girlfriend,
- you know?
[laughs]
Pretty hard, right?
- Yeah.
I don't want to, like,
getting them up
so I can get under the couch,
but they've ordered
a pear vodka.
- How're you gonna...
- Move them outside?
- If you went up and go,
- "Oh, my God,
We just spotted some dolphins.
Come outside," and then I
quickly go under the couch.
- So it's cabinet number four,
- pear vodka?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
- Boom.
- [whispers]
- Number four, pear vodka.
Guys, I think I actually just
saw a dolphin out here.
Do you want to come see
if we can spot one?
- Where?
- Up here.
- One, two, three, four.
- I think I saw one up here.
- Pear vodka.
Pear vodka.
- I'm, like,
- such a dolphin lover,
So I just freak out
every time.
- Hannah. Hannah.
I got the pear vodka.
- Disappeared.
A little white lie
never hurt anyone.
I'm gonna go grab your drinks.
♪ ♪
- Anchor's ready to drop.
- Copy that, Bobby.
Get this tender off
so we can maneuver.
- Have you been on a boat
- with a slide?
- I have not. No, not yet.
- Daniel. Jen.
- Can you please go
- to the swim platform
- And pull in the tender
- so we can anchor?
- Copy that.
- Are you seeing
any of the stews?
- Not yet.
- No, no, no.
- Daniel, do you copy?
- I got in trouble
- on my last charter.
- Uh-oh.
- We had eight
- Tilted Kilt girls on board.
- All right,
- I'm gonna go down there.
- Okay.
- I'll let you know
- when it's off.
- Danny, Bryan is calling you.
- Get over here.
- You need any thing,
- just holler.
- I'll be... I'll help
- you guys out, all right?
- Thank you.
- Appreciate it.
- Untie it from the bottom.
- Daniel,
- when I ask you something,
- Can you just please say,
- "Copy. Got you."
- I didn't hear you.
- I said, "Daniel,
- Please let me know
- when the tender's away."
- Got you.
- Get off your ass
and get sháá done.
- What's up?
- What happened?
- Well, you know, I'm not
- getting any confirmation.
- You can only go so far
with constructive criticism
until it's then like,
"Are you getting it or not?"
- In the fire department,
- there can be weak links,
But everyone has some thing
that they excel at,
- but Danny doesn't excel
- at all.
- Jen's been doing a lot better.
- Yeah.
- Like, her stock's going up
- for sure.
- Bryan. Bryan.
The tender's released.
- That's what we're looking for.
- Thank you.
- Okay, Captain, let us know when
- you're ready for us to drop.
- Okay, Bryan,
- go ahead and let go of port.
♪ ♪
- Okay, let's lock it off there
- and see what we get.
♪ ♪
- Copy that.
- We're locked off.
- Good teamwork.
- Boom.
♪ ♪
- Okay, Captain,
- we're gonna start dropping
The little tender
and the two jet skis.
- Get it, girl.
- Here, Jen, you got it?
- I got it.
- I got it.
- Okay, cool.
- Hannah. Hannah.
- The water toys
- are ready for the guests.
- Okay, copy that.
Hi, how you going?
- Good.
- I just wanted to check
- what time you guys
Would like lunch today.
- Yes.
- Okay, the jet skis
are ready for you.
- Perfect.
- Bryan. Hannah.
We've got just over an hour
to set up the beach picnic.
- Let's start loading up
- the tender
- With all the beach gear.
- You got it.
♪ ♪
- While we're doing lunch,
pull every thing for dinner.
- Just make sure
- the pantry's clear
- And that all the fridges
- are stocked.
With stewardesses that have
been a little slow off the bat,
- it's good to kind
- of build confidence and get them
To be doing more
integrated jobs around the boat,
so I'm gonna try
this approach with Tiffany
and keep my fingers crossed.
- Lunch about 2:30,
- 3:00, okay?
- We'll have to see.
I just can't see them
eating in an hour.
- What do you want me to say?
- Beach picnics
are really tough.
It affects everyone,
therefore there's a very
stressful energy on the boat.
- Are you okay with 2:30
or 3:00 for lunch?
- I'm working on it, babe.
- And girls,
We've got to go
so quickly, okay?
- Yeah.
- Have fun, boys.
- Throttle.
- Reverse.
♪ ♪
- Okay, let's go.
- Looks awesome, guys.
- Thank you.
- Okay, Bobby, I'm gonna need
- you to wear your bathing suit.
- You're gonna get wet, dude.
- I'll go now.
- Okay, I'm gonna have to manage
- and drive the boat,
- And Daniel, you're gonna have
- to hand him the stuff,
- And Jen, I'm gonna
- have you stay here
- And just look out
- for the guests.
- Cool.
- Anything else, guys?
- Can you take that crew
- quarters out of here please?
- I'm just jammed in here, man.
- Thanks, Danny.
- Anything else, man?
- Oh, no, you're good.
- Thanks a lot.
- Appreciate it, man.
- All right, no problem, buddy.
- No problem.
Bobby. Bobby, take one.
- Take it downstairs.
- Dude, you have two hands.
- You're going downstairs, bro.
- What the fááá?
- That's not being lazy.
That's teamwork.
- Really?
- It is team...
I just asked you to hand...
- What is your problem
- today, Bobby?
- I've been working
- all day today, bro.
Don't give me that sháá.
- I'm a team player,
and I don't want to see
anybody fail on my team,
- but you got to get
- your job right first
- Before you try
- and help somebody else's.
- Daniel, you ready?
- Ready.
- Got it?
- Yep. Got it.
- There's really nothing better
than just laying in the sun.
- I know.
- Dude, all we're worried about
- Right now is lunch.
- That's not true.
Mister Ben says,
- "Please get this out of my way,
- this whole thing."
- Okay, so you know
- what you've got to do?
- What are you even doing in
- the galley in the first place?
- Grabbing this.
- This is more important,
not our crew lunch.
Don't come at me
about teamwork.
- And if you want to
- talk to me, give me
- Constructive criticism
- opposed to yelling at me.
- You don't take
- constructive criticism!
- That doesn't
- solve any thing.
That solves nothing.
- Yelling solves
- fáááing nothing.
- Then why don't you take
- some constructive criticism?
- Let's sit down and talk.
- Talk to me like a man.
- You don't take it.
- I do take it.
- I am talking
- to you like a fáááing man.
- I do take it.
- Actually I'm talking to you
- Like you're a little boy
- 'cause that's what you are.
- Man, you got your tampon
- up your pussy right now, bro.
- Take it out.
- Really, bro?
- Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
- Whoa, calm down.
Calm the fááá down.
- Coming up...
- Ten more seconds
- of whatever you got.
- Whoo! Yay.
- Let's fáááing go.
- Finishing strong.
- Whoo!
- No, no, no, no.
- Shut your mouth
- when I'm talking to you.
- No.
- I'm not gonna shut my mouth.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
- Talk to me like a man.
- You don't take it.
- I do take it.
- Actually I'm talking to you
- like you're a little boy
'cause that's what you are.
- Man, you got your tampon
- up your pussy right now, bro.
- Take it out.
- Really, bro?
- Whoa, calm down. Calm down.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey.
- Calm the fááá down.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Hey, hey, stop.
Hey, be cool. Be cool.
- You want to fáááing
- talk sháá, boy?
- Dude.
- What are you thinking?
- I'll show you a fáááing man.
- What are you thinking, Daniel,
- pushing Bobby like that?
What are you thinking?
- The bigger they are,
- the harder they fall.
Remember that.
- Get off this boat
- right now, boy.
- Just 'cause you're big,
- I ain't scared.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey.
- Square up to me up here, boy!
- I ain't scared, bro.
- This is not the time
- and place, all right?
- You know what?
- I'm gonna switch you guys out.
- Jen, sorry,
- I need you here ASAP.
- Hey, come here.
Hold this line.
- It's all right, Bobby.
- Relax.
- Get the fááá out of here.
- Fááá him.
- That was bad. Bad, bad, bad.
[upbeat music]
- What do you
- like with your Jack?
Ginger, Coke?
- Ice.
- Yeah.
♪ ♪
- Bobby, you all right?
- Yeah.
- Whoo.
- That's really disgusting.
- He's a fáááing idiot.
- You want a lift?
- Yeah, please.
- Go ahead. Grab her.
- One, two, three.
- All right, bro,
- I'll be in touch, all right?
- I can't wait
- for the beach party.
- And then tonight,
theme party.
♪ ♪
- Tiffany, did you to cut up
lemons and limes this morning.
- I did not have a chance.
- Plates, bowls, cutlery,
- done wine glasses,
Done salt and pepper.
- Condiments must've
- been all that.
- It'll be a fun day.
♪ ♪
- Okay, let's go.
- All good, brother?
- We'll talk about this later.
- Ugh. There's so much drama
- today on deck.
- Hey?
- Daniel stepped to Bobby.
- [laughs]
That's ridiculous.
- Hey.
- What's up, man?
- How are you doing?
- Dude, I need some advice
or something, I don't know.
- Okay.
Do you want to go outside?
- Can we?
- I would love to.
I feel it's my duty
to look after Danny
and try and give him
sound advice
'cause I think
he's a sweet boy, you know,
- and he's obviously
- just very emotional.
- As I'm walking downstairs,
- Bobby's in front of me,
- And the plates
- are kind of heavy,
- And I'm like,
- "Hey, Bobby, come on.
- Help me out.
- Teamwork here,"
- And he's like, "Don't talk
- to me about teamwork!"
- Next thing you know, we're on
- this boat yelling at each other,
- And he's talking about teamwork
- this, teamwork that, you know?
- Yeah, but you saying, "Oh,
come on, it's teamwork, man,"
- you know,
- that's a jabby little comment,
- And you didn't get away with it,
- and he got
Right up in your grill, right?
- Yeah.
- You need to stroke his ego
- a little bit,
And he deserves it
because you did
let everyone down, right?
- Yeah.
Ben talks to me.
It's constructive criticism
in a nice manner.
- You need to drop your ego
and don't be
a chippy little bastard,
all right?
You're quite lucky
to be here, all right?
- I know, man.
- All right, so just suck it up.
- Aah!
Go faster.
- I hate beach picnics.
♪ ♪
- So did you hear
the Danny drama yet?
- No, but I'm really interested
- to hear it,
Just not right now.
- Oh.
- Look at that.
- Look at that.
- Yep.
- That's all goat sháá,
- isn't it?
- "Ionian Princess."
"Ionian Princess." Hannah.
We are ready on the beach
to receive the guests.
- Copy that.
- Whoo-hoo.
- The guests are on their way.
♪ ♪
- Hey, will you carry me?
[laughter]
- Jen, let's go back to
- the boat for our lunch break.
- Got it.
- Beautiful.
- I never had a meal
with a backdrop like this.
I just want to say I love you.
All: Cheers.
♪ ♪
- Ooh, it smells bad.
Uh-oh. That's not good.
- What happened, baby?
- I popped a fuse in the dryer.
A lot of my girlfriends,
they call me their boyfriend
because I fix every thing
for them. I'm very handy.
I grew up with my dad
and he's an electrician.
- I would much rather
- go to Home Depot
Than a Macy's any day.
All crew. All crew.
Does anyone know where
the breakers are
for the washers and dryers?
- Who's asking for that?
- Tiffany. Who else?
- Tiffany. Tiffany.
- Hannah.
Can you just do your job
and stop fáááing around?
- Oh, well.
- Where's the porta-potty at,
- right?
[laughter]
- You're looking at it.
- Lots of water.
- It's all gonna go
- to the same place.
- Right?
- Crazy old baby.
- He's a bad mate.
- I'm not looking.
- On this yacht, it's like,
my life has gone like, "Whoosh."
- If I go up
- to the Captain right now and go,
"There was an altercation.
Daniel pushed Bobby."
- You don't have to go
to the Captain and say all that.
- This is something between...
- You don't get to tell me what
- I have and have not
- to do, dude.
- I'm not telling you.
- I'm not telling you what to do,
- But we can handle
- this man to man.
- I'm not here
- to hold his hand.
He's one year younger than me
and he acts like he's
20 years younger than me.
- Pear shots?
- Kenny, do want to get some?
- Oh, yeah.
- Never gonna turn down
- getting some.
- [laughter]
- There you go.
- To rattlesnakes and condoms.
Two things I don't fááá with.
[laughter]
♪ ♪
- Just to confirm,
- guests are done with the beach,
- And we can pack up
- and come back to the boat.
- Okay, Hannah, sit tight.
Daniel, let's go.
♪ ♪
- Up.
Ninja.
- [screams]
- Oh, God!
- Whoo!
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
- We did it.
♪ ♪
- Did we have a good close look
- at the beach?
- We didn't leave any thing?
- Policed the beach good?
- Uh, yeah.
- We didn't leave any trash?
- I did a nice walk
- and so did Hannah.
- Okay, good.
- I'm gonna go upstairs.
- I'll be right back.
- All right.
- I don't need
- to involve the captain
- In my management style,
- you know?
- If I go crawling to the captain,
- "Oh, what should I do about,
- You know, the two guys that kind
- of don't like each other?"
You know, that's weak sauce.
I'm not about that weak sauce.
- I want you guys
- to hash this out right now.
- All right, I'm gonna walk away.
- All right.
- Cool.
- All right, see you, guys.
- All right, Danny.
- First off,
I'm gonna apologize.
- No, I'll apologize first.
I blew up at you.
You know, I know Ben
asked you to help out,
but you got to watch
your tone, man.
- You told me to take a tampon
- out of my ass.
- Out of nowhere.
- [laughs]
- It's not funny.
- It was pretty funny.
- No, it wasn't funny.
- But I apologize for that.
- Okay.
- I apologize for that.
- And don't say "a big tree
will fall hard," okay?
- Listen, man...
- It's true, though.
- Big tree, you know?
- Fááá.
Are you kidding me right now?
- Did you really
- just say that to me?
- Little boys fall hard...
- No, brother.
- So you better
- watch your mouth.
- My man,
- don't get it twisted.
But listen, seriously,
I want to be cool.
I don't want to fight no more.
You're my roommate,
but you're also my teammate,
and all this we need to squash.
- All right, well, prove it.
In the fire service,
trust is a huge thing.
- If somebody's gonna
- turn their back on you
- And lie to you, how am I gonna
- trust him in a fire?
How am I gonna trust Danny,
you know, docking a boat?
I can squash it for now,
- but I've got not
- a doubt in my mind
- That he's gonna
- be a dumbass later
And screw something up.
- That's hashed out.
- Cool.
- Let's get to work.
- Dinner's at 8:30.
Tiffany, have you done
the dinner check list?
- I have not yet.
- 8:30?
- 8:30.
- 8:30 dinner?
Oh, my God.
- [gasps]
- [gasps]
- [chuckles]
- The anger.
The anger.
Oh, gosh.
- Coming up...
- I love you so much.
- Hey, guys, I am out.
Enjoy your night, guys.
- The guests are having
a threesome up there,
and Danny is watching.
[upbeat music]
- Did you see what we're
- on on percentage-wise?
- They'll both need charging.
- Sweet. Yep.
- Where are they eating?
- Outside, right?
- Up on aft, yeah.
- If you need one of the girls
In the next half an hour,
they can give you a hand.
- Yeah, can you grab Danny?
Appreciate it.
- Danny. Danny.
- Hannah.
Could you give Ben a hand
in the galley please?
- Should I go help out Ben,
or should I go replace Bobby?
- I'll spell Bobby.
- Yeah?
- Mm-hmm.
- Be right on up.
- A little bit under the gun.
- What's up, my main man?
- Hey, bub, got some
serious work to be doing.
- Okay.
- Danny clearly needs
A lot of help,
and I reckon he should just
be in the galley.
It's a safe place,
and it could help the boat.
- Danny,
- when you're helping out Ben,
Just stay out of the way.
- When there's no room,
- it's like, "Ack!"
- No worries.
♪ ♪
- Where's Daniel?
- He's in the galley.
- That's what he wants to do.
- He doesn't want
- to be a deckhand.
- Is he helping?
- Yeah, I just saw him.
- Okay.
- Daniel's kind of like
- a little ant
That's stuck in your shoe.
He's just so annoying,
and if he can help Ben out,
- at least I don't have
- to deal with him.
- Jen, I'm gonna leave you
- to clean this up
- Just so these guys
- could lift the hay bales.
- I don't want you
- to get all hayed up.
- Yeah.
♪ ♪
- Tiff, does she want
the bales... hale... Bay...
Fáááing hay on there,
or does she want it up here?
- Just spread some out
on that dance floor,
and then one,
like, in the middle.
- Yeah. Tiff's taking charge
with setting the table.
You know, she's American.
- They're American,
- and she knows what they want.
Do you think more candles?
- I think we're good.
- I don't want to light
- the whole boat on fire just yet.
♪ ♪
- Giddy up, boy. Whoo!
- What do you got to damn do?
- All we need's the General Lee.
- But I like it.
- Yep.
- Yee-haw.
- Miss Hannah?
- Hello.
- How are you going?
- It's good.
- Hey, can I talk with you
- for a sec?
- Of course you can.
- Here's what I was thinking.
Are we doing dancing?
What's...
- Oh, yeah.
- Okay.
I would like the staff
to come and join us as well.
- Perfect.
- And we have a $200 prize...
- Mm-hmm.
- So it's well worth
the embarrassment.
- In my five years
in yachting,
- I've learned that
- if the charter guests say
- "dance, puppet,"
- you have to dance.
Okay, my pleasure.
It's just a bit more literal.
- All crew.
- All crew.
The guests have requested
everyone for the dancing
after dinner on the sky deck.
Thank you.
- Hey, big guy,
let's get you
to do something cool.
- All right.
- I'm gonna go get changed,
- And then you
- go an get changed,
- Then Tiffany goes
- and gets changed, okay?
- Yeah.
- Nice one, Danny, good job.
♪ ♪
- Looking real good.
- I should probably
- fry it more, right?
- Not too much more.
♪ ♪
- Look at Jen's face.
- She's like, "I'm so glad
- I don't work in the interior."
- No, it's nice.
- I've got the girls
- in Daisy Dukes.
We've borrowed the boys' tops.
- Yachting never ceases
- to amaze me.
- This may be one of the top
ten things I might regret doing.
- Oh, my God.
I don't regret seeing you.
- Bloody Hell.
- What?
- They fit so perfectly tonight.
Oh, my God,
she is ridiculously hot.
- What?
- [laughs]
- Yippee-kay-a.
- Yippee-kay-a is right.
- Five-star luxury yachting,
country ho down.
Don't really line up,
but we're gonna make it happen.
- They're gonna love this.
♪ ♪
- It's so cute.
- You look so wonderful, girl.
- Oh, thank you.
So are you guys
ready for dinner?
- Yeah, I say
- let's go to the table.
- Yeah?
- Ben, Ben, Ben.
Service is about to start.
- How cute is that?
- Whoo!
- I keep tripping on that thing.
- So you can just smash out
the cabins with Tiffany,
and I can do service alone.
- What is that?
- Tomago.
Wasabi cured flying fish roe.
I have one dinner
to wow the Oklahomians,
and I'm gonna go with Asian.
- All right, that's ready.
- It's colorful,
And hopefully for them,
it would be adventurous
and expand their horizon.
- This is beef fillet.
- Oh.
- Fillet?
With Tomago and cherry tomatoes.
- What's that green?
- It looks like masago.
- Oh.
- Rice with stir
fried vegetables.
It's a Southern country theme,
not southern tip of Japan,
so I'm really hoping
that they like it.
- It almost tastes
like there's soy sauce.
- Kind of warm.
- Go ahead and say it.
- This is amazing.
- It's delicious.
- Oh, my gosh.
- This has been a fun charter,
- but it's a lot of work.
- Yeah.
- I haven't got yelled at yet.
I think it'll be
tomorrow or tonight.
- Oh, yeah.
- Are we done?
- Mm-hmm.
- Prepare for some wild
and crazy sháá.
- I'm gonna go and round up
- the troops for this dance off.
Maybe these people from Oklahoma
- aren't actually as conservative
- as I first thought.
- Whoo!
- Birthday in the bag.
- All crew. All crew.
Whoever wants
to win $200 dancing,
- just head to the sky deck.
- Whoo!
- Let's see some
- Daisy Dukes shaking.
- All right, let's do it.
- So who's first?
- Bobby is first.
- Oh!
- Growing up,
- my parents owned a dance studio,
And I dabbled in dancing.
- Get on the hay, honey.
- I'm dead sober.
- There's no way I'm gonna
- be able to pull out
Any moves tonight.
- Bobby the beefcake.
- Ow!
[cheering]
- Ten more seconds
of whatever you got.
- Come on, man.
- Oh
- Whoo! Good job.
- Bobby the beefcake deckhand.
- Daniel's next.
Let's go, Daniel.
- Whoo!
[cheering]
- Yee-haw.
- Whoo.
- We got to get a girl now.
- Tiffany?
- Tiffany, you're up.
- You're up.
- Fááá it.
Let's see what I got.
- Whoo!
- Oh!
- Oh, yeah.
- Oh, my...
- Oh, there we go.
- She's dropping it.
- Let's go, Tiff.
- Wow.
[cheering]
- This is why I don't dance.
[laughter]
[all chanting] Hannah. Hannah.
Hannah. Hannah. Hannah.
- I spent so much
of my time
when you should be having fun
- working my way
- up the career ladder,
So now I try to have fun
as much as possible.
- Whoo!
- Yeah, baby, whoo!
- [cheering]
- Boom, boom, boom, boom.
- Whoo!
- Oh, she finishes strong!
- She just slut dropped.
- Oh, my God.
- I can't do this.
I can't do this.
- I'm a stewardess.
That is my job.
- You know, I can't perform
- like a monkey.
That's not what I do.
[cheering]
- Hannah Australia
for first place. 200 bucks.
- Thanks, honey.
- You're welcome.
- I need the dollar bills
to put down my... You know?
All: Oh!
- Make it rain, girl.
♪ ♪
- Okay, I'm going to bed.
- All right.
- Don't stay up too late.
- Have a good night.
- I'll see you tomorrow.
- Oh, this is Southside shuffle.
- I know.
- I'm like, "What are you doing?"
- Yeah, because I'm drunk.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
- Yeah, you all pass me
- the chicken wing.
- Whoo.
- Let me try it.
I can't get it.
Three, four, five.
- Then you go up.
- Okay?
Two, three, four.
One... One more time.
- There you go!
- You got it now.
[country music]
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
- I appreciate that.
- Awesome.
- Come on, Daniel.
- One more time.
♪ ♪
- Guys, I'm gonna leave
your shots here, okay?
- When you've been in yachting
- for as long as I have,
You definitely learn
when to take your leave.
- ♪ I will sex you up ♪
- I love you so much.
- All right, guys,
- I am out.
- Enjoy your night, guys.
- Thanks, Daniel.
- Thank you, guys.
- Thank you for being so great.
Appreciate it.
- Danny just went through this
- on the last charter.
He doesn't learn.
It's like "Dumb and Dumber"
in one person.
- That's having someone's back.
Ben gave it to Hannah.
- Ben actually knows
- what's going on.
- He's been in yachting
- long enough,
- And he knows that Danny's
- in the wrong,
- So for him
- to take Danny's side
And not back me, it's actually
like a personal insult.
- Why are you...
- Coming up...
- I've given you so many
fáááing second chances.
It's ridiculous.
- You're here to do the job
- that I'm telling you to do.
You're here to work for me.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Oh, I'm gonna
- have to flip you.
- [squeals]
[laughs]
- We got to keep
- it professional, all right?
- Ooh,
- do I get a spanking?
[laughs]
♪ ♪
- I wasn't actually
rude to her, was I?
- I mean,
- like I didn't swear or...
I didn't call her a name
or nothing like that, right?
- Not that I recall.
- Yeah, exactly.
- I haven't seen that side
- of you yet, man, so...
- Well, it's just
- the threesome thing
- I thought was
- a bit farfetched.
- Well, where is...
- Where was the threesome?
- Okay,
she came down and said,
- "The guests are
- having a threesome up there,
And Danny's watching."
That's what she said.
- Dude, no, no.
They're in the Jacuzzi,
- and I was talking to Kenny
- and...
- So why the hell
did she say that?
- I don't know.
- So how much have you
- cussed us so far?
- Oh, not at all.
- It's actually
- cleaning up pretty easy.
You guys have a good time
last night?
- Oh, my, yeah.
- We're just...
- We're all close, you know?
- Yep.
- Right, no kidding.
After doing this once,
you know, it's like,
- we're gonna do this again.
- Yeah.
[both laugh]
- Pretty wild.
- Yeah.
- [laughs]
- Yeah.
♪ ♪
- Stupidity in its finest
last night.
- Oh, what a night.
♪ ♪
'Cause apparently
Daniel saw it.
- I mean,
- I wouldn't put it past them.
- Like, they're pretty comfortable
- with each other.
- Yesterday
just wound everyone up.
- Yeah.
- Now, that was the finale.
You know what I mean?
Just when you think
it's all over, boom.
[both laugh]
♪ ♪
- Feeling better?
- It's just a bit
- too much, right?
- Yeah.
- After he spoke
- to me like that,
- Speaking out
- for the junior deckhand
Over your chief stew, no.
♪ ♪
- I was told that Hannah
went off on you last night.
What was she giving
you crap for?
- She was saying
that I shouldn't be upstairs
speaking to the guests.
- However, one of the guests
- really wanted to speak to me.
- And what was he talking to you
- about that was so important?
- No, he was just sharing...
- For him to get out
and stop enjoying his night
to speak with you?
- He was just
sharing me his life story.
- I'm extremely annoyed.
- I don't think it's right at all.
He should know better.
- No one else thinks
- this is right,
And ultimately
this is bizarre.
- This is, again, something that
- we've addressed before, right?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Okay, Cap, go ahead.
- On our way.
- I'm coming.
- We'll talk about this later.
- Okay, yeah.
[whirring]
- Clearing all the way home.
- Anchor's in the pocket.
- Roger that.
- So what's the situation?
- All right,
- so we're doing that.
Mascarpone capers
and smoke salmon please.
- Smoke salmon and capers.
All: Yes.
[laughter]
- Guess we're gonna have
- to own it
In a certain way, right?
- Can we just please talk
- about it when the guests
- Are off 'cause...
- I just want to finish this up.
- Yeah, I know, babe.
Just know that, you know,
I'm not at all cross with you.
- I was just...
- You have no right to...
- Let's talk
- about it after, okay?
Please. Thank you.
- Yeah.
- Deck crew,
- let's do this now.
- Captain, no vessels
- approaching from the stern.
- We're wide open.
- Copy that. Thank you.
- All set?
- All set.
♪ ♪
[indistinct radio chatter]
- Got to tight them up.
Lock them off.
- All right.
- All right.
- Thank you.
- It was a lot of fun with you.
- It was really great.
- Thank you.
- Great time.
- Nice meeting you.
- At the end of the day,
- it's always about the tip,
And I'm gonna do my best
to make sure
that they have
an amazing time,
but it's hard to do that
without me getting in trouble.
- Thank you so much, and I have
something for you here.
- Oh, thank you very much.
We really appreciate it.
- Guys, thank you.
- Thank you, Kenny.
- All right.
- Enjoy the rest.
- Safe travels.
- All right.
- Bye, everybody.
- Thank you, guys.
- Bye-bye, you guys.
- Should we go strip beds?
- Let's strip.
♪ ♪
- Hey, Hannah?
- Mm-hmm.
- Can we step outside
- for a quick second?
- Yeah, sure.
- I want to talk about last
night 'cause it got real heated
- there in the kitchen.
- Mm-hmm.
- When what was going on
- in the Jacuzzi,
- Standing next
- to the guests and chatting
- And taking
- the main charter guests
Away from his guests,
that is affecting the guests.
- I... I did not take anyone
from anywhere.
He told me,
"Daniel, can I please
speak to you over here?"
He wanted to speak to me.
- He basically
- doesn't have boundaries,
- And he's a freaking
- eight-year old stuck
In a nine-year-old's body.
- And it would be very rude for
- me to excuse myself
In that moment in time.
- Well, that's your opinion.
- Yeah, you weren't there
for the conversation,
- so I understand.
- Yeah.
- No, because I don't have
- those conversations with guests
Because it's not professional.
- They keep saying
- "level of professionalism."
There has not been
one charter guest that says,
"Why are you talking to me?
Dude, stay away from me."
- No, they welcome it.
- They want it.
Hannah's wrong.
She's wrong.
I don't want to fight.
I just want to be cool.
- I want to do my job,
- and I want to help you
Do your job better.
- I... I don't need your help
- to do my job better.
- Okay, then that's fine.
- That really pissed me off.
I'm not gonna get told
by the junior deckhand
how to do my job.
He was so cocky because
he thinks Ben's got his back
so he's untouchable now.
- That's all I'm saying.
- You do your job.
I see that.
- Yeah.
- All crew. All crew.
- Can we get together
- at rear mess
For the post-charter meeting.
Thank you.
- Oh, yeah.
- Hey, Captain.
- Hi, gang, how's it going?
Great charter, you guys.
- I think that these guys
- are really gonna remember this
For a long time.
- Nothing happened on this charter
- that was negative.
- There's just no denying
- that everybody worked together
And really pulled off
a great charter for these guys.
- I think, to be honest,
- Captain Mark
Is playing this really well.
- The best thing
- you can do some times
Is leave the children
to work out their own issues.
- Stack.
- Man.
- Whoo.
- So there's 18,000 Euros here.
That's $20,000 U.S.
That's 1,500 Euros apiece.
- Yay!
- We got it.
- Danny, good job this weekend.
- Thank you, Captain.
I'm connecting with the guests,
- and I'm crossing
- this line of professionalism,
- But yet,
- the charter guests,
- They recognize
- that we're doing a good job.
- Meeting adjourned.
- Thanks much.
- All right.
- Whoo.
- Knocked it out of the park.
♪ ♪
- I got my dancing shoes
- on tonight.
- Yay.
♪ ♪
- All right,
- this is it, I guess.
- Wait, what is this,
a house of mirrors?
- I'll do a vodka soda lime.
- Tiff,
- I'm gonna order for you.
- Can I please have vodka
- cranberry?
- Passion fruit lime,
and lime again,
then passion fruit.
- Cheers.
- After this,
- smoking one more cigarette,
And then I go back.
- Bryan, may I join you
- for that?
- Absolutely.
- I think my actions
have been underappreciated,
and I want to correct that.
- Daniel. Daniel.
- Yeah.
- Let me stop you right there...
- Okay.
- 'Cause I know
- where you're going.
Do you know what the best thing
about five-star service is?
Is that you don't breach
that difference
between service and friendship.
You just don't.
I've given you so many
fáááing second chances.
It's ridiculous.
We're here to
roll their towels.
We're here to wipe off
their wet spots,
and that's it, okay?
You're here to do the job
that I'm telling you to do.
Every time you go
to take a fáááing piss,
- you come and ask me.
- Seriously.
You understand that?
You're here to work for me.
- Next on
"Below Deck Med."...
- I was like, "Oh,
- he's actually not a bad kisser.
Let's do this again."
- Ooh!
- Ben. Ben. Hannah.
- Just to confirm, we've got
- the main course coming.
Is that right?
- No, I thought we cleared it
- that I was just gonna do
Two courses, right?
- Oh, fááá.
I'll wait.
- All crew. All crew.
- We just received
- a Mayday call from a vessel.
- They are taking on water.
- They are requesting assistance.
- Okay, copy that.
- Watch out. Watch out.
- Back up. Back up.
- They've got to get out.
- They're going down.
- For more on
- "Below Deck Med.,"
"Below Deck Med."...
- There's feeding going on here.
- Thanks for looking out.
- Do you got a little something
- for Bryan?
- Yeah.
- Bryan's definitely my type.
- He's a little surfer boy.
- He's fit.
- No, I just
- think you can do it.
- Thanks, Mr. Robinson.
- I think Tiffany's
- really cute.
Yeah, she's weird, but she's
smart, and I like that.
I haven't met
anyone like you.
- We got a lot of sháá
to take care of.
- Okay.
- Explained to you
- in every single fáááing way
We possibly could
why that's not okay,
and now you went and did it
behind our backs.
- Now you've got two strikes
- against you.
Three, you're definitely
out of here.
Hannah's sweet,
but the chief stew and chef
is the hardest
relationship to work.
- I don't know.
I haven't decided yet.
- I'm going to bed.
- Me, too, let's go.
Get in there.
- [laughs]
[foghorn blows]
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
♪ ♪
- Let's go to my mattress.
- All right. It's all good.
- Sexual love is in the air.
You're absolutely crazy.
- [laughs]
- What the fááá?
- Oh, fááá.
- All right, listen,
I'm not in fáááing high school.
Get the fááá out of here,
both of you, all right?
I'm serious.
- Yeah, I'm fáááing serious.
- Okay.
- Get the fááá out of here.
This isn't a fáááing
frat house,
I don't' want to be
part of his good time.
I don't want to be
in the room with his good time.
I just think he should
bugger off and go
and good-time somewhere else.
- You too, bro.
♪ ♪
- Oof.
- Nice.
- What are you doing
- in my dungeon?
- I'm trying
- to find my underwear.
Oh, here we go.
- I know that Bryan's
- a frat boy,
And flirting is
what they're good at.
- Want to trade massages?
- Yeah, sure.
- Hey, Tiffany, um,
both of you,
can I just say something?
I think I overreacted,
- and I shouldn't of sworn
- and yelled and...
- Oh, no, no, no.
- I could've handled it better.
- Totally chill, brother.
- Look, water
- under the bridge, okay?
- Yeah, absolutely.
- I... you know,
It's just kind of...
- There's
- a lot nicer places to go.
- Promise you.
- Yeah, I agree.
- Hint, hint,
hot tub, double beds.
- I don't want
- to clean those places.
- Just not in that little hovel
that I happen to share.
I'm a big believer in sex.
- If anyone's gonna get it
- on with Tiffany,
It's gonna be me,
really, isn't it?
- Cheers, Ben.
- So did you guys
do any thing last night.
- You just make
- out or anything?
- We just started snuggling
- and like, getting comfortable,
And then Ben came in.
- Damn it.
- I know. It's okay.
There's one thing I got.
Time.
♪ ♪
- Bryan. Bryan. You, Hannah,
and Ben to the bridge.
♪ ♪
Looks like what we have here
is a one-day charter.
- That's perfect.
- Kenny and Brian
are best friends.
Apparently these guys
are Oklahoma millionaires.
- Obviously they're going to be
- used to the five-star treatment.
- I don't know much
- about Oklahoma.
I saw the Broadway.
That's about it.
- So we've got a beach picnic.
Big water sports people.
Snorkel and play
with water toys.
- Awesome.
- "A country-themed dance party
With line dancing
and two-stepping."
- I'm sure
- you're really familiar
With all of that.
- Oh, yeah.
- It would be cool
- if we could get, like,
A big thing of...
- What?
- A hay bale.
- A hay bale, yeah.
- What is it?
Hays of bale?
- Oh, I'm going
- here already.
- Nice.
- Thanks a bunch.
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
- Thanks, Captain.
- We have the preference sheet.
- Dump it out on me, baby.
Let's see it.
- Millionaires from Oklahoma.
- [gasps]
- Has his own plane.
- Yeah, yeah, they're rich,
and they want to have
a country themed dance party.
- Oh.
- Bow-ba-ba-bow-ba-
ba-bow-ba-ba.
- They're gonna
- be expecting topnotch service.
- Exactly.
- Yeah.
- We learned a lot
- from our last charter.
- This charter, let's
- have a good one,
So watch your step Danny.
- You know?
- I got you,
- And I'm gonna
- do good for you guys.
- Daniel's on very,
- very thin ice.
- If he doesn't flip the script
- and start acting the way
That I want him to,
he could be fired real quick.
- So yeah, that's it,
- y'all.
- Sounds good.
- Let's do it, baby.
♪ ♪
- I've got a five... four feta
- and five simi.
- Is that enough?
- Huh?
- I've got...
What are you laughing at?
- I thought you said "semi."
You did?
[laughing]
- How old are you?
Seriously.
- Two?
- Ben definitely gives off
mixed messages.
- If you like me, then you just
- need to say it,
Otherwise just be honest
instead of playing
games like in school.
- 13?
- Old enough to get a semi.
13, yeah, there you go.
- Gross.
- Ugh.
[laughs]
- How's it going?
- Hi.
- The windows look great,
- but let's see
- If we can't do it faster.
- Cool?
- Okay.
- All right, thank you.
Daniel-son, did you see
the spots on the stairs
I was talking about right here?
- Okay, all the way... almost
- all the way down the stairs.
- Then look at on top here?
- Yeah.
- And there's this.
And I specifically
pointed that out.
- I need to get
- on Bryan's good side.
I just got
to be that "yes" man.
- See these railings?
- Had to hit them again.
They're super salty, dude.
- [sighs]
- It sucks so bad.
♪ ♪
- Can you pass me
the honey, honey?
- Tiff and I, we're just kind
of going with the flow,
and if we have an opportunity
to take it to the next level,
I don't think I'd stop.
- Hey, can you hand me
- a little spoon?
- Oh, Jesus.
- Tiff.
- Captains are supposed
- to work inside.
- You're not a captain,
- are you?
[upbeat banjo music]
- Deck crew,
- we have provisions.
- Hello.
These our hay bales?
- Bobby. Bobby.
- It's Julia.
- I just love the way
she says my name.
- Oh, my God.
- Go ahead.
- Julia could tell me
- to scrub toilets all day
Long with that accent,
and I'm on it.
They weren't joking.
- No, Hannah's on it.
- About to have a ho
down over here.
- All crew.
- All crew.
Heads up. No smoking
on the aft deck.
There's hay on the aft deck.
- Oh, my Lord.
This is gonna make a mess.
- Thank you so much.
Aah!
My hay's here.
- Your hay is here.
- How fáááing cool is that?
- I'm not looking forward
- to the clean up.
- Now we just need to learn
- how to line dance.
- Hey, baby.
- You got sháá all over you now.
- It's all good, brother.
- I'm trying with him,
but at the same time,
my bank account
is running low
on patience with Danny.
- We need cowboy hats.
- I'll work something out.
♪ ♪
[rock music]
- Okay, looking good.
Looking good.
- You want me to start detailing
the windows on the bridge deck?
- I think Jen
- already did that.
- Did you, Jen?
- Sure.
- I think Jen's come
- pretty far.
She's picking up the slack
that we're missing from Daniel,
and I appreciate her attitude.
Good, good, good.
Thank you.
- Julia and Tiffany,
can I have a minute?
So basically
what we're gonna do,
Julia and me
on the beach picnic,
and then you here
pulling every thing
for dinner tonight
with the decorations
which it can be very obvious
it's a country theme.
I've been sipping rosé
in the south of France
for the past five years,
so I must admit, not a lot
of experience in country,
so I'm gonna turn to Tiffany
on this one 'cause
she seems
a bit country bumpkin.
- What about
- doing the placemats out of hay,
Like scatter them about?
No?
- I'll figure something out.
- Yeah?
- Yeah, and what
are we wearing tonight?
- There's nothing more country
- than Daisy Dukes in my eyes.
- And what are we doing
- around the bottom half?
- Daisy Dukes.
- What are they?
- Short-shorts.
- Jean shorts?
- Like denim shorts.
- Really?
- I don't want to be
- in short-shorts
- In front of the...
- Do you know what I mean?
And them creeping,
it's... Ugh.
- Okay, but let's try
and pull it out of a hat.
- All crew.
- All crew.
- Guests arriving. Make sure
- you're in your whites please.
♪ ♪
- Clip this on your back.
♪ ♪
- Okay, gang,
they're walking on the boat.
And here we go.
- Coming up.
- Your head is not
- where it needs to be.
- You got your tampon
- up your pussy right now, bro.
Take it out.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Okay, gang,
- they're walking on the boat.
- Looks like three levels
- of party.
- I know nothing about Oklahoma,
but I'm guessing they speak
kind of slow like this.
- Greetings.
- How're you doing?
- Welcome aboard. Mark Howard.
- Captain.
- Nice to meet you.
- Bryan.
- Ken.
- Nice to meet you, Ken.
- I'm Amber.
- Hi, Amber.
- Nice to meet you.
- Julia. Nice to meet you.
- "I like waffles and bacon."
Like, it's kind of like that.
- Well, welcome
- aboard the "Ionian Princess."
- Hannah's gonna take you
- around the yacht,
- And we'll get you taken care of.
- Sounds great.
♪ ♪
- Okay,
- so this is our sundeck.
- Beautiful.
- Got a Jacuzzi.
- Have to use that later.
- Yeah.
- Pretty amazing.
- Look at this thing.
It's a fáááing tank.
Yep, I got it.
- This is the main saloon.
- Oh, this is gorgeous.
- How long
- have you been stewing?
- Six years.
- Like babysitting?
- We're not babysitting
Russian billionaires.
- Best thing that's coming
out of Russia is strippers.
♪ ♪
- So we'll start
- in the master.
- Better go check out
- the bathroom.
- Yeah, 'cause
- that's what matters.
- Wow.
- It's beautiful. See the swan?
- Yeah.
- If you need any thing,
- just come find me.
- Okay. All right.
- Okay?
- Once everybody's in position,
- let me know.
- Cap, we're ready to go.
- Bobby, you can release lines
- whenever you're ready.
♪ ♪
Bowline line one is in.
- Bow to port.
- Jen, slack this spring.
Beautiful.
- Number two bowlines
- are pulled in.
- Okay, Captain,
- all lines are free.
♪ ♪
- Okay, gentlemen
and ladies, good job.
- Bobby, you just want to help
hold both of the lines here?
- You can throw some of them
- in the locker.
- What's going on with this one?
This is Danny's?
- Yeah.
- What the fááá is this?
It's just like, "Oh, my God,
are you kidding me?"
♪ ♪
- Hi.
- How you going?
- About time for a drink.
- Ooh.
- What kind
- of vodkas do you have?
- We have vanilla, citron,
mandarin, and pear.
- Can I have a mandarin
on the rocks?
- I'll have pear.
- Sure.
- Okay, thank you.
- Pleasure.
♪ ♪
- Bobs,
you make me smile.
- I'm glad.
- Then I'm doing my job.
- You do.
At home I've got a brother,
and my best friend is a guy,
and I have a laugh with anyone.
Little ones.
- I don't know.
- Bobby is just my mate.
- He's just a 6'4" girlfriend,
- you know?
[laughs]
Pretty hard, right?
- Yeah.
I don't want to, like,
getting them up
so I can get under the couch,
but they've ordered
a pear vodka.
- How're you gonna...
- Move them outside?
- If you went up and go,
- "Oh, my God,
We just spotted some dolphins.
Come outside," and then I
quickly go under the couch.
- So it's cabinet number four,
- pear vodka?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
- Boom.
- [whispers]
- Number four, pear vodka.
Guys, I think I actually just
saw a dolphin out here.
Do you want to come see
if we can spot one?
- Where?
- Up here.
- One, two, three, four.
- I think I saw one up here.
- Pear vodka.
Pear vodka.
- I'm, like,
- such a dolphin lover,
So I just freak out
every time.
- Hannah. Hannah.
I got the pear vodka.
- Disappeared.
A little white lie
never hurt anyone.
I'm gonna go grab your drinks.
♪ ♪
- Anchor's ready to drop.
- Copy that, Bobby.
Get this tender off
so we can maneuver.
- Have you been on a boat
- with a slide?
- I have not. No, not yet.
- Daniel. Jen.
- Can you please go
- to the swim platform
- And pull in the tender
- so we can anchor?
- Copy that.
- Are you seeing
any of the stews?
- Not yet.
- No, no, no.
- Daniel, do you copy?
- I got in trouble
- on my last charter.
- Uh-oh.
- We had eight
- Tilted Kilt girls on board.
- All right,
- I'm gonna go down there.
- Okay.
- I'll let you know
- when it's off.
- Danny, Bryan is calling you.
- Get over here.
- You need any thing,
- just holler.
- I'll be... I'll help
- you guys out, all right?
- Thank you.
- Appreciate it.
- Untie it from the bottom.
- Daniel,
- when I ask you something,
- Can you just please say,
- "Copy. Got you."
- I didn't hear you.
- I said, "Daniel,
- Please let me know
- when the tender's away."
- Got you.
- Get off your ass
and get sháá done.
- What's up?
- What happened?
- Well, you know, I'm not
- getting any confirmation.
- You can only go so far
with constructive criticism
until it's then like,
"Are you getting it or not?"
- In the fire department,
- there can be weak links,
But everyone has some thing
that they excel at,
- but Danny doesn't excel
- at all.
- Jen's been doing a lot better.
- Yeah.
- Like, her stock's going up
- for sure.
- Bryan. Bryan.
The tender's released.
- That's what we're looking for.
- Thank you.
- Okay, Captain, let us know when
- you're ready for us to drop.
- Okay, Bryan,
- go ahead and let go of port.
♪ ♪
- Okay, let's lock it off there
- and see what we get.
♪ ♪
- Copy that.
- We're locked off.
- Good teamwork.
- Boom.
♪ ♪
- Okay, Captain,
- we're gonna start dropping
The little tender
and the two jet skis.
- Get it, girl.
- Here, Jen, you got it?
- I got it.
- I got it.
- Okay, cool.
- Hannah. Hannah.
- The water toys
- are ready for the guests.
- Okay, copy that.
Hi, how you going?
- Good.
- I just wanted to check
- what time you guys
Would like lunch today.
- Yes.
- Okay, the jet skis
are ready for you.
- Perfect.
- Bryan. Hannah.
We've got just over an hour
to set up the beach picnic.
- Let's start loading up
- the tender
- With all the beach gear.
- You got it.
♪ ♪
- While we're doing lunch,
pull every thing for dinner.
- Just make sure
- the pantry's clear
- And that all the fridges
- are stocked.
With stewardesses that have
been a little slow off the bat,
- it's good to kind
- of build confidence and get them
To be doing more
integrated jobs around the boat,
so I'm gonna try
this approach with Tiffany
and keep my fingers crossed.
- Lunch about 2:30,
- 3:00, okay?
- We'll have to see.
I just can't see them
eating in an hour.
- What do you want me to say?
- Beach picnics
are really tough.
It affects everyone,
therefore there's a very
stressful energy on the boat.
- Are you okay with 2:30
or 3:00 for lunch?
- I'm working on it, babe.
- And girls,
We've got to go
so quickly, okay?
- Yeah.
- Have fun, boys.
- Throttle.
- Reverse.
♪ ♪
- Okay, let's go.
- Looks awesome, guys.
- Thank you.
- Okay, Bobby, I'm gonna need
- you to wear your bathing suit.
- You're gonna get wet, dude.
- I'll go now.
- Okay, I'm gonna have to manage
- and drive the boat,
- And Daniel, you're gonna have
- to hand him the stuff,
- And Jen, I'm gonna
- have you stay here
- And just look out
- for the guests.
- Cool.
- Anything else, guys?
- Can you take that crew
- quarters out of here please?
- I'm just jammed in here, man.
- Thanks, Danny.
- Anything else, man?
- Oh, no, you're good.
- Thanks a lot.
- Appreciate it, man.
- All right, no problem, buddy.
- No problem.
Bobby. Bobby, take one.
- Take it downstairs.
- Dude, you have two hands.
- You're going downstairs, bro.
- What the fááá?
- That's not being lazy.
That's teamwork.
- Really?
- It is team...
I just asked you to hand...
- What is your problem
- today, Bobby?
- I've been working
- all day today, bro.
Don't give me that sháá.
- I'm a team player,
and I don't want to see
anybody fail on my team,
- but you got to get
- your job right first
- Before you try
- and help somebody else's.
- Daniel, you ready?
- Ready.
- Got it?
- Yep. Got it.
- There's really nothing better
than just laying in the sun.
- I know.
- Dude, all we're worried about
- Right now is lunch.
- That's not true.
Mister Ben says,
- "Please get this out of my way,
- this whole thing."
- Okay, so you know
- what you've got to do?
- What are you even doing in
- the galley in the first place?
- Grabbing this.
- This is more important,
not our crew lunch.
Don't come at me
about teamwork.
- And if you want to
- talk to me, give me
- Constructive criticism
- opposed to yelling at me.
- You don't take
- constructive criticism!
- That doesn't
- solve any thing.
That solves nothing.
- Yelling solves
- fáááing nothing.
- Then why don't you take
- some constructive criticism?
- Let's sit down and talk.
- Talk to me like a man.
- You don't take it.
- I do take it.
- I am talking
- to you like a fáááing man.
- I do take it.
- Actually I'm talking to you
- Like you're a little boy
- 'cause that's what you are.
- Man, you got your tampon
- up your pussy right now, bro.
- Take it out.
- Really, bro?
- Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
- Whoa, calm down.
Calm the fááá down.
- Coming up...
- Ten more seconds
- of whatever you got.
- Whoo! Yay.
- Let's fáááing go.
- Finishing strong.
- Whoo!
- No, no, no, no.
- Shut your mouth
- when I'm talking to you.
- No.
- I'm not gonna shut my mouth.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
- Talk to me like a man.
- You don't take it.
- I do take it.
- Actually I'm talking to you
- like you're a little boy
'cause that's what you are.
- Man, you got your tampon
- up your pussy right now, bro.
- Take it out.
- Really, bro?
- Whoa, calm down. Calm down.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey.
- Calm the fááá down.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Hey, hey, stop.
Hey, be cool. Be cool.
- You want to fáááing
- talk sháá, boy?
- Dude.
- What are you thinking?
- I'll show you a fáááing man.
- What are you thinking, Daniel,
- pushing Bobby like that?
What are you thinking?
- The bigger they are,
- the harder they fall.
Remember that.
- Get off this boat
- right now, boy.
- Just 'cause you're big,
- I ain't scared.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey.
- Square up to me up here, boy!
- I ain't scared, bro.
- This is not the time
- and place, all right?
- You know what?
- I'm gonna switch you guys out.
- Jen, sorry,
- I need you here ASAP.
- Hey, come here.
Hold this line.
- It's all right, Bobby.
- Relax.
- Get the fááá out of here.
- Fááá him.
- That was bad. Bad, bad, bad.
[upbeat music]
- What do you
- like with your Jack?
Ginger, Coke?
- Ice.
- Yeah.
♪ ♪
- Bobby, you all right?
- Yeah.
- Whoo.
- That's really disgusting.
- He's a fáááing idiot.
- You want a lift?
- Yeah, please.
- Go ahead. Grab her.
- One, two, three.
- All right, bro,
- I'll be in touch, all right?
- I can't wait
- for the beach party.
- And then tonight,
theme party.
♪ ♪
- Tiffany, did you to cut up
lemons and limes this morning.
- I did not have a chance.
- Plates, bowls, cutlery,
- done wine glasses,
Done salt and pepper.
- Condiments must've
- been all that.
- It'll be a fun day.
♪ ♪
- Okay, let's go.
- All good, brother?
- We'll talk about this later.
- Ugh. There's so much drama
- today on deck.
- Hey?
- Daniel stepped to Bobby.
- [laughs]
That's ridiculous.
- Hey.
- What's up, man?
- How are you doing?
- Dude, I need some advice
or something, I don't know.
- Okay.
Do you want to go outside?
- Can we?
- I would love to.
I feel it's my duty
to look after Danny
and try and give him
sound advice
'cause I think
he's a sweet boy, you know,
- and he's obviously
- just very emotional.
- As I'm walking downstairs,
- Bobby's in front of me,
- And the plates
- are kind of heavy,
- And I'm like,
- "Hey, Bobby, come on.
- Help me out.
- Teamwork here,"
- And he's like, "Don't talk
- to me about teamwork!"
- Next thing you know, we're on
- this boat yelling at each other,
- And he's talking about teamwork
- this, teamwork that, you know?
- Yeah, but you saying, "Oh,
come on, it's teamwork, man,"
- you know,
- that's a jabby little comment,
- And you didn't get away with it,
- and he got
Right up in your grill, right?
- Yeah.
- You need to stroke his ego
- a little bit,
And he deserves it
because you did
let everyone down, right?
- Yeah.
Ben talks to me.
It's constructive criticism
in a nice manner.
- You need to drop your ego
and don't be
a chippy little bastard,
all right?
You're quite lucky
to be here, all right?
- I know, man.
- All right, so just suck it up.
- Aah!
Go faster.
- I hate beach picnics.
♪ ♪
- So did you hear
the Danny drama yet?
- No, but I'm really interested
- to hear it,
Just not right now.
- Oh.
- Look at that.
- Look at that.
- Yep.
- That's all goat sháá,
- isn't it?
- "Ionian Princess."
"Ionian Princess." Hannah.
We are ready on the beach
to receive the guests.
- Copy that.
- Whoo-hoo.
- The guests are on their way.
♪ ♪
- Hey, will you carry me?
[laughter]
- Jen, let's go back to
- the boat for our lunch break.
- Got it.
- Beautiful.
- I never had a meal
with a backdrop like this.
I just want to say I love you.
All: Cheers.
♪ ♪
- Ooh, it smells bad.
Uh-oh. That's not good.
- What happened, baby?
- I popped a fuse in the dryer.
A lot of my girlfriends,
they call me their boyfriend
because I fix every thing
for them. I'm very handy.
I grew up with my dad
and he's an electrician.
- I would much rather
- go to Home Depot
Than a Macy's any day.
All crew. All crew.
Does anyone know where
the breakers are
for the washers and dryers?
- Who's asking for that?
- Tiffany. Who else?
- Tiffany. Tiffany.
- Hannah.
Can you just do your job
and stop fáááing around?
- Oh, well.
- Where's the porta-potty at,
- right?
[laughter]
- You're looking at it.
- Lots of water.
- It's all gonna go
- to the same place.
- Right?
- Crazy old baby.
- He's a bad mate.
- I'm not looking.
- On this yacht, it's like,
my life has gone like, "Whoosh."
- If I go up
- to the Captain right now and go,
"There was an altercation.
Daniel pushed Bobby."
- You don't have to go
to the Captain and say all that.
- This is something between...
- You don't get to tell me what
- I have and have not
- to do, dude.
- I'm not telling you.
- I'm not telling you what to do,
- But we can handle
- this man to man.
- I'm not here
- to hold his hand.
He's one year younger than me
and he acts like he's
20 years younger than me.
- Pear shots?
- Kenny, do want to get some?
- Oh, yeah.
- Never gonna turn down
- getting some.
- [laughter]
- There you go.
- To rattlesnakes and condoms.
Two things I don't fááá with.
[laughter]
♪ ♪
- Just to confirm,
- guests are done with the beach,
- And we can pack up
- and come back to the boat.
- Okay, Hannah, sit tight.
Daniel, let's go.
♪ ♪
- Up.
Ninja.
- [screams]
- Oh, God!
- Whoo!
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
- We did it.
♪ ♪
- Did we have a good close look
- at the beach?
- We didn't leave any thing?
- Policed the beach good?
- Uh, yeah.
- We didn't leave any trash?
- I did a nice walk
- and so did Hannah.
- Okay, good.
- I'm gonna go upstairs.
- I'll be right back.
- All right.
- I don't need
- to involve the captain
- In my management style,
- you know?
- If I go crawling to the captain,
- "Oh, what should I do about,
- You know, the two guys that kind
- of don't like each other?"
You know, that's weak sauce.
I'm not about that weak sauce.
- I want you guys
- to hash this out right now.
- All right, I'm gonna walk away.
- All right.
- Cool.
- All right, see you, guys.
- All right, Danny.
- First off,
I'm gonna apologize.
- No, I'll apologize first.
I blew up at you.
You know, I know Ben
asked you to help out,
but you got to watch
your tone, man.
- You told me to take a tampon
- out of my ass.
- Out of nowhere.
- [laughs]
- It's not funny.
- It was pretty funny.
- No, it wasn't funny.
- But I apologize for that.
- Okay.
- I apologize for that.
- And don't say "a big tree
will fall hard," okay?
- Listen, man...
- It's true, though.
- Big tree, you know?
- Fááá.
Are you kidding me right now?
- Did you really
- just say that to me?
- Little boys fall hard...
- No, brother.
- So you better
- watch your mouth.
- My man,
- don't get it twisted.
But listen, seriously,
I want to be cool.
I don't want to fight no more.
You're my roommate,
but you're also my teammate,
and all this we need to squash.
- All right, well, prove it.
In the fire service,
trust is a huge thing.
- If somebody's gonna
- turn their back on you
- And lie to you, how am I gonna
- trust him in a fire?
How am I gonna trust Danny,
you know, docking a boat?
I can squash it for now,
- but I've got not
- a doubt in my mind
- That he's gonna
- be a dumbass later
And screw something up.
- That's hashed out.
- Cool.
- Let's get to work.
- Dinner's at 8:30.
Tiffany, have you done
the dinner check list?
- I have not yet.
- 8:30?
- 8:30.
- 8:30 dinner?
Oh, my God.
- [gasps]
- [gasps]
- [chuckles]
- The anger.
The anger.
Oh, gosh.
- Coming up...
- I love you so much.
- Hey, guys, I am out.
Enjoy your night, guys.
- The guests are having
a threesome up there,
and Danny is watching.
[upbeat music]
- Did you see what we're
- on on percentage-wise?
- They'll both need charging.
- Sweet. Yep.
- Where are they eating?
- Outside, right?
- Up on aft, yeah.
- If you need one of the girls
In the next half an hour,
they can give you a hand.
- Yeah, can you grab Danny?
Appreciate it.
- Danny. Danny.
- Hannah.
Could you give Ben a hand
in the galley please?
- Should I go help out Ben,
or should I go replace Bobby?
- I'll spell Bobby.
- Yeah?
- Mm-hmm.
- Be right on up.
- A little bit under the gun.
- What's up, my main man?
- Hey, bub, got some
serious work to be doing.
- Okay.
- Danny clearly needs
A lot of help,
and I reckon he should just
be in the galley.
It's a safe place,
and it could help the boat.
- Danny,
- when you're helping out Ben,
Just stay out of the way.
- When there's no room,
- it's like, "Ack!"
- No worries.
♪ ♪
- Where's Daniel?
- He's in the galley.
- That's what he wants to do.
- He doesn't want
- to be a deckhand.
- Is he helping?
- Yeah, I just saw him.
- Okay.
- Daniel's kind of like
- a little ant
That's stuck in your shoe.
He's just so annoying,
and if he can help Ben out,
- at least I don't have
- to deal with him.
- Jen, I'm gonna leave you
- to clean this up
- Just so these guys
- could lift the hay bales.
- I don't want you
- to get all hayed up.
- Yeah.
♪ ♪
- Tiff, does she want
the bales... hale... Bay...
Fáááing hay on there,
or does she want it up here?
- Just spread some out
on that dance floor,
and then one,
like, in the middle.
- Yeah. Tiff's taking charge
with setting the table.
You know, she's American.
- They're American,
- and she knows what they want.
Do you think more candles?
- I think we're good.
- I don't want to light
- the whole boat on fire just yet.
♪ ♪
- Giddy up, boy. Whoo!
- What do you got to damn do?
- All we need's the General Lee.
- But I like it.
- Yep.
- Yee-haw.
- Miss Hannah?
- Hello.
- How are you going?
- It's good.
- Hey, can I talk with you
- for a sec?
- Of course you can.
- Here's what I was thinking.
Are we doing dancing?
What's...
- Oh, yeah.
- Okay.
I would like the staff
to come and join us as well.
- Perfect.
- And we have a $200 prize...
- Mm-hmm.
- So it's well worth
the embarrassment.
- In my five years
in yachting,
- I've learned that
- if the charter guests say
- "dance, puppet,"
- you have to dance.
Okay, my pleasure.
It's just a bit more literal.
- All crew.
- All crew.
The guests have requested
everyone for the dancing
after dinner on the sky deck.
Thank you.
- Hey, big guy,
let's get you
to do something cool.
- All right.
- I'm gonna go get changed,
- And then you
- go an get changed,
- Then Tiffany goes
- and gets changed, okay?
- Yeah.
- Nice one, Danny, good job.
♪ ♪
- Looking real good.
- I should probably
- fry it more, right?
- Not too much more.
♪ ♪
- Look at Jen's face.
- She's like, "I'm so glad
- I don't work in the interior."
- No, it's nice.
- I've got the girls
- in Daisy Dukes.
We've borrowed the boys' tops.
- Yachting never ceases
- to amaze me.
- This may be one of the top
ten things I might regret doing.
- Oh, my God.
I don't regret seeing you.
- Bloody Hell.
- What?
- They fit so perfectly tonight.
Oh, my God,
she is ridiculously hot.
- What?
- [laughs]
- Yippee-kay-a.
- Yippee-kay-a is right.
- Five-star luxury yachting,
country ho down.
Don't really line up,
but we're gonna make it happen.
- They're gonna love this.
♪ ♪
- It's so cute.
- You look so wonderful, girl.
- Oh, thank you.
So are you guys
ready for dinner?
- Yeah, I say
- let's go to the table.
- Yeah?
- Ben, Ben, Ben.
Service is about to start.
- How cute is that?
- Whoo!
- I keep tripping on that thing.
- So you can just smash out
the cabins with Tiffany,
and I can do service alone.
- What is that?
- Tomago.
Wasabi cured flying fish roe.
I have one dinner
to wow the Oklahomians,
and I'm gonna go with Asian.
- All right, that's ready.
- It's colorful,
And hopefully for them,
it would be adventurous
and expand their horizon.
- This is beef fillet.
- Oh.
- Fillet?
With Tomago and cherry tomatoes.
- What's that green?
- It looks like masago.
- Oh.
- Rice with stir
fried vegetables.
It's a Southern country theme,
not southern tip of Japan,
so I'm really hoping
that they like it.
- It almost tastes
like there's soy sauce.
- Kind of warm.
- Go ahead and say it.
- This is amazing.
- It's delicious.
- Oh, my gosh.
- This has been a fun charter,
- but it's a lot of work.
- Yeah.
- I haven't got yelled at yet.
I think it'll be
tomorrow or tonight.
- Oh, yeah.
- Are we done?
- Mm-hmm.
- Prepare for some wild
and crazy sháá.
- I'm gonna go and round up
- the troops for this dance off.
Maybe these people from Oklahoma
- aren't actually as conservative
- as I first thought.
- Whoo!
- Birthday in the bag.
- All crew. All crew.
Whoever wants
to win $200 dancing,
- just head to the sky deck.
- Whoo!
- Let's see some
- Daisy Dukes shaking.
- All right, let's do it.
- So who's first?
- Bobby is first.
- Oh!
- Growing up,
- my parents owned a dance studio,
And I dabbled in dancing.
- Get on the hay, honey.
- I'm dead sober.
- There's no way I'm gonna
- be able to pull out
Any moves tonight.
- Bobby the beefcake.
- Ow!
[cheering]
- Ten more seconds
of whatever you got.
- Come on, man.
- Oh
- Whoo! Good job.
- Bobby the beefcake deckhand.
- Daniel's next.
Let's go, Daniel.
- Whoo!
[cheering]
- Yee-haw.
- Whoo.
- We got to get a girl now.
- Tiffany?
- Tiffany, you're up.
- You're up.
- Fááá it.
Let's see what I got.
- Whoo!
- Oh!
- Oh, yeah.
- Oh, my...
- Oh, there we go.
- She's dropping it.
- Let's go, Tiff.
- Wow.
[cheering]
- This is why I don't dance.
[laughter]
[all chanting] Hannah. Hannah.
Hannah. Hannah. Hannah.
- I spent so much
of my time
when you should be having fun
- working my way
- up the career ladder,
So now I try to have fun
as much as possible.
- Whoo!
- Yeah, baby, whoo!
- [cheering]
- Boom, boom, boom, boom.
- Whoo!
- Oh, she finishes strong!
- She just slut dropped.
- Oh, my God.
- I can't do this.
I can't do this.
- I'm a stewardess.
That is my job.
- You know, I can't perform
- like a monkey.
That's not what I do.
[cheering]
- Hannah Australia
for first place. 200 bucks.
- Thanks, honey.
- You're welcome.
- I need the dollar bills
to put down my... You know?
All: Oh!
- Make it rain, girl.
♪ ♪
- Okay, I'm going to bed.
- All right.
- Don't stay up too late.
- Have a good night.
- I'll see you tomorrow.
- Oh, this is Southside shuffle.
- I know.
- I'm like, "What are you doing?"
- Yeah, because I'm drunk.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
- Yeah, you all pass me
- the chicken wing.
- Whoo.
- Let me try it.
I can't get it.
Three, four, five.
- Then you go up.
- Okay?
Two, three, four.
One... One more time.
- There you go!
- You got it now.
[country music]
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
- I appreciate that.
- Awesome.
- Come on, Daniel.
- One more time.
♪ ♪
- Guys, I'm gonna leave
your shots here, okay?
- When you've been in yachting
- for as long as I have,
You definitely learn
when to take your leave.
- ♪ I will sex you up ♪
- I love you so much.
- All right, guys,
- I am out.
- Enjoy your night, guys.
- Thanks, Daniel.
- Thank you, guys.
- Thank you for being so great.
Appreciate it.
- Danny just went through this
- on the last charter.
He doesn't learn.
It's like "Dumb and Dumber"
in one person.
- That's having someone's back.
Ben gave it to Hannah.
- Ben actually knows
- what's going on.
- He's been in yachting
- long enough,
- And he knows that Danny's
- in the wrong,
- So for him
- to take Danny's side
And not back me, it's actually
like a personal insult.
- Why are you...
- Coming up...
- I've given you so many
fáááing second chances.
It's ridiculous.
- You're here to do the job
- that I'm telling you to do.
You're here to work for me.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- Oh, I'm gonna
- have to flip you.
- [squeals]
[laughs]
- We got to keep
- it professional, all right?
- Ooh,
- do I get a spanking?
[laughs]
♪ ♪
- I wasn't actually
rude to her, was I?
- I mean,
- like I didn't swear or...
I didn't call her a name
or nothing like that, right?
- Not that I recall.
- Yeah, exactly.
- I haven't seen that side
- of you yet, man, so...
- Well, it's just
- the threesome thing
- I thought was
- a bit farfetched.
- Well, where is...
- Where was the threesome?
- Okay,
she came down and said,
- "The guests are
- having a threesome up there,
And Danny's watching."
That's what she said.
- Dude, no, no.
They're in the Jacuzzi,
- and I was talking to Kenny
- and...
- So why the hell
did she say that?
- I don't know.
- So how much have you
- cussed us so far?
- Oh, not at all.
- It's actually
- cleaning up pretty easy.
You guys have a good time
last night?
- Oh, my, yeah.
- We're just...
- We're all close, you know?
- Yep.
- Right, no kidding.
After doing this once,
you know, it's like,
- we're gonna do this again.
- Yeah.
[both laugh]
- Pretty wild.
- Yeah.
- [laughs]
- Yeah.
♪ ♪
- Stupidity in its finest
last night.
- Oh, what a night.
♪ ♪
'Cause apparently
Daniel saw it.
- I mean,
- I wouldn't put it past them.
- Like, they're pretty comfortable
- with each other.
- Yesterday
just wound everyone up.
- Yeah.
- Now, that was the finale.
You know what I mean?
Just when you think
it's all over, boom.
[both laugh]
♪ ♪
- Feeling better?
- It's just a bit
- too much, right?
- Yeah.
- After he spoke
- to me like that,
- Speaking out
- for the junior deckhand
Over your chief stew, no.
♪ ♪
- I was told that Hannah
went off on you last night.
What was she giving
you crap for?
- She was saying
that I shouldn't be upstairs
speaking to the guests.
- However, one of the guests
- really wanted to speak to me.
- And what was he talking to you
- about that was so important?
- No, he was just sharing...
- For him to get out
and stop enjoying his night
to speak with you?
- He was just
sharing me his life story.
- I'm extremely annoyed.
- I don't think it's right at all.
He should know better.
- No one else thinks
- this is right,
And ultimately
this is bizarre.
- This is, again, something that
- we've addressed before, right?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Okay, Cap, go ahead.
- On our way.
- I'm coming.
- We'll talk about this later.
- Okay, yeah.
[whirring]
- Clearing all the way home.
- Anchor's in the pocket.
- Roger that.
- So what's the situation?
- All right,
- so we're doing that.
Mascarpone capers
and smoke salmon please.
- Smoke salmon and capers.
All: Yes.
[laughter]
- Guess we're gonna have
- to own it
In a certain way, right?
- Can we just please talk
- about it when the guests
- Are off 'cause...
- I just want to finish this up.
- Yeah, I know, babe.
Just know that, you know,
I'm not at all cross with you.
- I was just...
- You have no right to...
- Let's talk
- about it after, okay?
Please. Thank you.
- Yeah.
- Deck crew,
- let's do this now.
- Captain, no vessels
- approaching from the stern.
- We're wide open.
- Copy that. Thank you.
- All set?
- All set.
♪ ♪
[indistinct radio chatter]
- Got to tight them up.
Lock them off.
- All right.
- All right.
- Thank you.
- It was a lot of fun with you.
- It was really great.
- Thank you.
- Great time.
- Nice meeting you.
- At the end of the day,
- it's always about the tip,
And I'm gonna do my best
to make sure
that they have
an amazing time,
but it's hard to do that
without me getting in trouble.
- Thank you so much, and I have
something for you here.
- Oh, thank you very much.
We really appreciate it.
- Guys, thank you.
- Thank you, Kenny.
- All right.
- Enjoy the rest.
- Safe travels.
- All right.
- Bye, everybody.
- Thank you, guys.
- Bye-bye, you guys.
- Should we go strip beds?
- Let's strip.
♪ ♪
- Hey, Hannah?
- Mm-hmm.
- Can we step outside
- for a quick second?
- Yeah, sure.
- I want to talk about last
night 'cause it got real heated
- there in the kitchen.
- Mm-hmm.
- When what was going on
- in the Jacuzzi,
- Standing next
- to the guests and chatting
- And taking
- the main charter guests
Away from his guests,
that is affecting the guests.
- I... I did not take anyone
from anywhere.
He told me,
"Daniel, can I please
speak to you over here?"
He wanted to speak to me.
- He basically
- doesn't have boundaries,
- And he's a freaking
- eight-year old stuck
In a nine-year-old's body.
- And it would be very rude for
- me to excuse myself
In that moment in time.
- Well, that's your opinion.
- Yeah, you weren't there
for the conversation,
- so I understand.
- Yeah.
- No, because I don't have
- those conversations with guests
Because it's not professional.
- They keep saying
- "level of professionalism."
There has not been
one charter guest that says,
"Why are you talking to me?
Dude, stay away from me."
- No, they welcome it.
- They want it.
Hannah's wrong.
She's wrong.
I don't want to fight.
I just want to be cool.
- I want to do my job,
- and I want to help you
Do your job better.
- I... I don't need your help
- to do my job better.
- Okay, then that's fine.
- That really pissed me off.
I'm not gonna get told
by the junior deckhand
how to do my job.
He was so cocky because
he thinks Ben's got his back
so he's untouchable now.
- That's all I'm saying.
- You do your job.
I see that.
- Yeah.
- All crew. All crew.
- Can we get together
- at rear mess
For the post-charter meeting.
Thank you.
- Oh, yeah.
- Hey, Captain.
- Hi, gang, how's it going?
Great charter, you guys.
- I think that these guys
- are really gonna remember this
For a long time.
- Nothing happened on this charter
- that was negative.
- There's just no denying
- that everybody worked together
And really pulled off
a great charter for these guys.
- I think, to be honest,
- Captain Mark
Is playing this really well.
- The best thing
- you can do some times
Is leave the children
to work out their own issues.
- Stack.
- Man.
- Whoo.
- So there's 18,000 Euros here.
That's $20,000 U.S.
That's 1,500 Euros apiece.
- Yay!
- We got it.
- Danny, good job this weekend.
- Thank you, Captain.
I'm connecting with the guests,
- and I'm crossing
- this line of professionalism,
- But yet,
- the charter guests,
- They recognize
- that we're doing a good job.
- Meeting adjourned.
- Thanks much.
- All right.
- Whoo.
- Knocked it out of the park.
♪ ♪
- I got my dancing shoes
- on tonight.
- Yay.
♪ ♪
- All right,
- this is it, I guess.
- Wait, what is this,
a house of mirrors?
- I'll do a vodka soda lime.
- Tiff,
- I'm gonna order for you.
- Can I please have vodka
- cranberry?
- Passion fruit lime,
and lime again,
then passion fruit.
- Cheers.
- After this,
- smoking one more cigarette,
And then I go back.
- Bryan, may I join you
- for that?
- Absolutely.
- I think my actions
have been underappreciated,
and I want to correct that.
- Daniel. Daniel.
- Yeah.
- Let me stop you right there...
- Okay.
- 'Cause I know
- where you're going.
Do you know what the best thing
about five-star service is?
Is that you don't breach
that difference
between service and friendship.
You just don't.
I've given you so many
fáááing second chances.
It's ridiculous.
We're here to
roll their towels.
We're here to wipe off
their wet spots,
and that's it, okay?
You're here to do the job
that I'm telling you to do.
Every time you go
to take a fáááing piss,
- you come and ask me.
- Seriously.
You understand that?
You're here to work for me.
- Next on
"Below Deck Med."...
- I was like, "Oh,
- he's actually not a bad kisser.
Let's do this again."
- Ooh!
- Ben. Ben. Hannah.
- Just to confirm, we've got
- the main course coming.
Is that right?
- No, I thought we cleared it
- that I was just gonna do
Two courses, right?
- Oh, fááá.
I'll wait.
- All crew. All crew.
- We just received
- a Mayday call from a vessel.
- They are taking on water.
- They are requesting assistance.
- Okay, copy that.
- Watch out. Watch out.
- Back up. Back up.
- They've got to get out.
- They're going down.
- For more on
- "Below Deck Med.,"