Below Deck Mediterranean (2016–…): Season 1, Episode 11 - They Hate Us Cuz They Ain't Us - full transcript

The demanding charter guests extend their stay, and Hannah puts on her best stew face to regain their trust. Julia and Ben have a class war after a miscommunication goes awry. Meanwhile, ...

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"Below Deck Med"...

- If I talked the way that you
- talk to me to the captain,

I would be ashamed of myself.

- Let's just not talk anymore
- about, all right? We're done.

You're so close to getting

fáááing canned, bro.

I am gonna take your phone

- when we've got
- charter guests on board.

It's like I can't win.

Who's not up?

Them two are not up.

What do you mean, "Them two?"

- Those two.
- Okay, cool.

Those two.

The first moment I met Ben,

- I knew
- he was privately educated.

He's very condescending

and very dismissive.

Tequila. Four.

- This is like a fáááing
- frat house right now.

- Oh, my God!
- Ooh.

You okay?

Are you bringing dessert?

- I'm gonna bring
- the main first.


I'm smiling.

There's a opportunity

for us to stay longer.

- The concern we're having
- right now is some of the group

- Is not getting along
- with Hannah.

- Jesse just came up to me
- and said

- That they're extending
- their charter.

You've got to be

fáááing kidding me.

[horn blaring]

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

[hip-hop music]

So, Hannah, I think

the guests have perceived that

you're not real happy with their

presence and their behavior.

In my five years in yachting,

I've never had anyone go

to the captain about my service.

You know that we've done,

what, seven charters now,

and every guest has always said,

"She's always smiling.

- "It doesn't matter what time."
- That's me as a person.

That's me as a chief stew,

but I can only be pushed so far.

To be honest, they're vulgar.

- They're disgusting.
- They're rude.

- Do you want to stick Tiffany
- and Julia more in front of 'em?

- That's exactly
- what I'm going to do.

Okay, let's do that.

- I'm kind of disappointed
- in myself, to be honest.

They should not be able to see

- that I'm not
- impressed with them.

I can only be, like,

pushed so far

before it's gonna be apparent

- that I'm getting
- a little bit sick

Of being treated like sháá.

- I'm not gonna come down hard
- on Hannah

Because I'm sure

it's a personality situation

and really has very little to do

with her level of service.

- I'm... I'm sorry.
- Okay.

Okay. Thank you, Captain.

Thank you.

So we're staying here tonight,

- and then we're gonna end
- our trip in Santorini.

Oh, my God, that's so awesome.

This is our boat.

[electronic music]

♪ ♪

- The rubber thing's gone
- down there,

- But I always get scared
- of putting my finger down there.

Can you dry this,

someone, please.

- [buzzing]
- [laughing]


What is that?

- Oh, it's the end
- of the honeycomb thing.


- All right, can you hurry up
- with that platter, please?

Ben can just be

a bit snappy sometimes.

I could never work

directly underneath Ben... never.



They've just extended

their charter.


Are you serious? Holy sháá.

They've extended the charter.


I think they went

to the captain about me,

so I'm gonna have

to put you guys on service.

- Oh, it's just a bit much,
- isn't it?

We're just all exhausted.

- I mean, Ben just
- gives assy comments.

- And you're just like,
- "Fáááing save it."

- I'm trying to do my job
- "just as much as you are."

- There's no respect there.
- No.

- Do you know what I mean?
- Yeah.

I'm not really sure

if Julia and Tiffany realize

what it's like working

so closely with Ben,

but I am really worried

that Julia's about to find out.

- Group hug.
- What a great thing

- To wake up to in my brig.
- Aww.

Two crying stews

and a complaint.


All right, girls. Ready?

One, two. Perfect.

All right, now what?

- Butt shot.
- Butt shot, okay.

Oh, that's great.

Real, real nice. Now what?

- Daniel, Daniel, Bryan.
- Go for Daniel.

- Where are you?
- I'm on the bow

With the guests just kind of,

you know, watching.

- Thank you.
- Come here.

- Just come down
- to the platform.

On my way.

Nothing's really changed.

It's just the same old Daniel.

All around turd burger.

We're gonna jump in and clean

the waterline back here.

You two are.

- Okay.
- We're gonna go in the water?

- I don't want to send Jen
- in there because

Then she'll take four hours

in the shower, so yeah,

- we're gonna... you guys are gonna
- get your bathing suits on,

Get a life vest, grab some rags,

and come look at this.

- You know, it would be
- a different perspective

If Daniel was a great deckhand

and good at his job

- and was a yes-man.
- Don't lose that bottle.

Then I would just think that

- he's just over-friendly
- with the guests

- And that he can work
- on that aspect of him

Being a deckhand, but no.

- Daniel, you're just
- holding onto this line

For dear life, aren't you?

You are so tangled up

and the vest

is just bouncing all over.

You're living the dream, Daniel.

[bouncy music]

♪ ♪


Ah, bloody tampon.

Isn't yachting glamorous?

That's disgusting.

That's a first.

- We need more drinks.
- Love a drink.

It has been a long time

since they've come around

to check on us.

What do 12 people do down there

while we're sitting

here needing stuff?

What do you want?

Greek snacks. Like, olives.

- I think Ben can
- make that happen.

- I'm on it.
- Bring the nice one up.

The one girl that we like.

- Julia. We like Julia.
- Oh, Julia. Bring her.

Yeah, bring Julia.

I'm on it.

I don't like this charter.

Those guys are fáááing gross.


- She just swung her tampon
- on the floor?

Yeah, like, prior

to fáááing banging.

Oh, my God. That's disgusting.

[knocking on door]

- Hey.
- Hello.

- Hello.
- How's it going?

So I had a request

for Greek snacks?

When do you want Greek...

Greek snacks? Later?

Uh, maybe, like, now?

Now. Okay.

These guests are very difficult,

but I do feel that Julia

should be more on top of it.

It's an open-ended challenge.


Let me put some thought into it.

Okay, and, Julia,

there's a request for alcohol.

Okay. I'll just come up.

Two seconds.


When you're an adult

working amongst professionals

- and you're getting your own
- phone taken away from you?

I mean, that's just pathetic.

- Do you think you could talk
- to him about that?

- 'Cause I'd like to
- at least show him...

You can talk to him about it.

- You can't just go to him
- and be like,

"Hey, let's test Danny out

with the phone?"

No. I'm over it.

No one's ever here.

- No one's come up here
- since I've been sitting here.

- Hi.
- Ahh, there she is.

- All right, what drinks
- can I get you?

- We thought you forgot
- about us up here.

No, I was cleaning away

all the breakfast for you.

Can I just get a...

A vodka water, please?

A vodka and a water separate?

No, no, no, no, no.

Just mostly vodka

with a splash of water.

Okay, yup, of course.

Any other drinks?

We're fine now.

No? Okay.

She's nice, isn't she?

She's nice in a hateful way.

The blond girl hated us.

Yeah, she definitely hates us.

They hate us

'cause they ain't us.


Do you know what I don't like?

- When people don't say "please"
- or "thank you."

It really winds me up.

Thank you, Julia.

For what?

Just for being you.

- Don't like that either,
- Daniel.

Here we go.



Wow, it's so hot in here.

- What kind of smoothies
- can you make?

Like, some kind of mango?

I'm gonna go and get some

more stuff downstairs.


Oh. Oh, really?


- Hello.
- Hi, Daniel.

Daniel, do you ever work?

- I actually don't
- ever see you work.

I always work.

- You were in the kitchen
- doing nothing.

You saw me running around

like a headless chicken

but didn't think

to ask to help, no?

- I all... I'm always there.
- Tell me.

I'm pulling 16-hour days

for four months.

I'm missing home.

I'm missing my boyfriend.

My English stiff upper lip

- is definitely
- breaking right now.


I've been help...

They're awful, no?

- Every time I go up there,
- they ask for something new.

- Like, I've got to do
- a smoothie now.

Blueberries, strawberries.

Douche berries.

Douche one, two, and three.

- [knocking on door]
- Hello.


- We're just checking on
- the drinks and the Greek snacks.

- They are on their way.
- Appreciate it.


Are you fáááing kidding me?

- I don't think people like that
- should be able

- To make money
- and become rich.

Did you find any of the stews?

Are they taking naps?

What would you like me

to do, Ben?

- I don't want you
- to do anything.

Thank you.

A bucket of ice

and a bottle of vodka.

Yeah, of course.

Did you add something

spicy to the salsa?

- They might have
- done jalapeños... I can see.

- I just feel like
- I'm being probed from everywhere

And that basically

anything we do

is not gonna be to a standard

that they want.

- They want another wine 'cause he
- spilled it and a vodka Sprite.

- Okay.
- There's, like,

A very real possibility

- that we're gonna
- run out of vodka.

There you go, babe.

We've got more of

the curry chicken.

- Those are fantastic.
- I'll hop back in five minutes.

- Five minutes.
- Thank you.

All right, timer starts...

No. No.

Sorry. Can I clean?

- What'd you put on there, man?
- Just...

- Oh.
- Okay, I'm busy.

Please? I'm sorry.

All good, brother.

You try and make yourself up

here so everyone looks little.

How you talk to me is sometimes

very condescending.

- Maybe you're overreacting.
- Okay.

Are you kidding me?

I'm the bad guy, right?


Bryan, we're ready to start
pulling chain, please.

Yup, I'm standing by.

Go for it.

We're at two shots at 10:00.

Anchor's in the pocket.

[hip-hop music]

♪ ♪

- Ah!
- That's fáááing disgusting.

You're pigs.

I am at the top of my game

- when it comes to service
- in yachting,

But these people would not know

five-star service

if it hit them

in their Botoxed faces.

They are disgusting.

This was

the cleanest room, actually.

[upbeat music]

Looking good. [Whistles]

Tie off, Daniel.

Got it.

- Okay, Captain, we've got more
- than enough room.

We're looking really good.

Okay, gentlemen,

a really good job.

That's a wrap.

[dance music]

This town looks awesome.

- Hey, guys, are we going or what?
- All right.


Are we doing this?

- So I'm done for
- the night I guess?

You have ten more minutes.

Oh. Yeah. All right.

Captain, may I have

another opportunity

to prove myself

with my cell phone?

Pretty much learned my lesson.

I won't pull it out on deck.

- I'll just keep it
- in my room and...

I'll tell you what: If you

leave it in your cabin,

you can have it back

in the evening,

- but if we see it
- outside once...

- Okay.
- Gone again.

Deal. That... that works for me.

Are you fáááing kidding me?

I really respect Captain Mark,

but I'm surprised

that he gave him the respect

that Daniel thinks he deserves,

which he doesn't.

- Cap, may I come up with you?
- Sure.

All right, cool.

What I've learned is everything

is negotiable in life.

Okay, now...

Okay, so the deal is...

- In your cabin.
- In my cabin.

- Only.
- You can trust me,

- And I'm gonna build that trust,
- Cap, so no worries.

- Okay.
- Thanks, Cap.

- Okay. Sure thing.
- Thank you.

- I'm happy that
- I have my phone back.

I felt naked without my phone,

and now I feel like

I got some clothes on.

- Docking today
- went pretty flawless.

- I liked being up on
- the anchors for that one.

Captain gave Daniel

his phone back.

Not even. He goes, "Uh",

- "Captain,
- I really learned my lesson.

"I understand."

You know, doing his whole

fáááing victim speech.

- Captain's like, "All right,"
- well, look, at night

"You can have your phone back."

Okay, that's cool.

- He's like a werewolf and there's
- a full moon every night,

- But instead of a badass
- werewolf,

He just morphs into a... a fáááing

little shááhead.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- We get in these conversations
- every time we're together.

I disagree.

Accent battle between

Julia and Hannah.

- Who wins?
- Julia.

I think Julia too.

- Yeah, what if
- we never go home.

I say we just buy this boat.

- I'll cosign.
- Yeah!


To extensions!

[festive music]

What are you doing?

Oh, my God.

- I've been travelling around
- with this unicorn mask.

I had a boss where he would

want me to greet him

in my unicorn mask

with a glass of champagne.

I love that guy.

- You know you're 29, right?
- Yeah.


- All crew, all crew, the guests
- are on their way back.


All right, hit the magic

button, Magic Mike.

It's now time to inject myself

with steroids of stew face.

- Hello.
- Hi.

- Do you want me to go
- and set you guys up somewhere?

We're calling it.

Calling it a night?

Okay, well, sleep well.

Thank you.


Captain. How are you?

- How are you, Cameron?
- Nice to see you.

So listen, tomorrow morning

we want to do

some ATVs, some quad bikes.

Oh, okay.

Then I think hopefully...

Oh, over on Naxos.

Yes, correct.

- Jesse and maybe one
- or two of the others

Might want a crew member

to drive them on the ATV

so that they can drink.

- Um. We'll make it happen.
- All right, great.

- Okay, Cameron, you got it.
- All right, thank you.

Appreciate it.

Okay. Thank you.


- Hey.
- How you doing?

- We... we're actually
- gonna have to live

With these guys for a bit.

- Yeah.
- You know what I mean?

- Just a culture shock for me,
- as well.

I'm not used to dealing

with Americans.

I just need to really,

really fake it and not piss off,

- so I think that works better
- with these guests.

It works better with me too.


Fake Hannah is the best.

So much better

than real Hannah.

I feel like me and Ben have,

like, turned a new leaf.

We can take our armor off

and get along

instead of fighting

each other all the time.

Okay, Benny, have a good night.

- Yeah, you, too, honey bunny.
- Cheers.

Hey, Captain, how you doing?

The guests requested

riding ATVs ashore.

- Looks like we have to go back
- to Naxos in the morning.

- Fááá these guests.
- More of a pain in the ass.

Because Naxos is the only place

with ATVs,

we have to go back to Naxos.

This is, like,

a charter boat times ten.

It's three charters.

- We spend five hours
- going there,

And we have to spend

five hours coming back.

You got to look at this

as a challenge.

How's your day been?

- I just want to get
- through this charter.

- I just want to get through it
- and get off the boat.

I'm all right.

I'm just drained from it.

I want to come home.

Everyone thinks the yachting

industry is so glamorous,

but the reality is you're doing

16 hours a day.

I don't know how many more

charters I've got left in me.

All right. I love you.

I love you saying that.

All right, bye. Bye.

Bye. Bye.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Bryan, Bryan.
- Go ahead.

- How soon can you
- be ready to go?

Five minutes.

Okay, let me know.

Okay, Captain, Jen's already

in the tender, and she's away.

Let's do it. Drop lines.

This one's gonna go first.

♪ ♪

- Okay, Captain,
- we're nearly there.

- Just one more starboard
- line left.

♪ ♪

All lines clear.

All lines clear.

We're looking good.

♪ ♪

[horn blaring]

- Okay, Captain, Captain,
- we are all set on the stern.

All locked down.

We are good to go.

♪ ♪

- Are you all right for drinks?
- Yes.

- Yeah.
- Yeah, doing great. Thank you.

- I was just wondering is there
- anything you'd like

- For breakfast?
- Just, like, a croissant that

We can put egg

and bacon and cheese into.

- Let me see what I can
- do for you.

Thank you.

- Hey, Captain.
- Hey.

I take it

we are converting to anchoring.

Yes, we're gonna anchor.

The dock will be available

to us at 6:00 p.m.

The guests requested

four designated drivers.

These are manually shifted

vehicles versus automatics.

I think with you guys

there that it'll remain safe.

- I think so.
- I'm just gonna talk

To Hannah real quick

- and she if she wants
- to spare somebody.

If not, it's gonna be

the whole deck department,

- and then as soon
- as you get back,

Hopefully the wind'll

come down enough for us

to move the boat back inside.


♪ ♪

Okay, where are they?

Where are the croissants?

I could definitely eat now.

I've been craving a croissant.

It's a big deal for me to get

Jesse what he wants to eat.

Breakfast the day before,

they weren't too keen on it.

It's a big issue.

Guests have requested

croissants for breakfast.

- Uh-huh?
- We haven't got croissants.

No, absolutely not.

Daniel, your phone stays here.

Look at the dude's hair.

You know he's... someone's

gonna sit on his lap.

[upbeat music]

It's a Kodak moment, Bryan.

♪ ♪

Okay, Bryan, go ahead

and drop anchor.

Here we go.

♪ ♪

Um, Bryan, is there any way

- you can get croissants
- from the local bakery

For us on the tender?

Plain croissants.


- Yeah, I don't see why not.
- Thank you.


We've ran out of croissants.

- I'll try and get
- one of the boys to go off

- And get some
- on the tender, okay?

- Oh, that'd be awesome.
- I'll see if this'll help you.

- Do you think he could
- so some bacon,

Egg, cheese burritos for us?

- Okay. Yup.
- Thank you.

Julia, Julia,

I'll be as fast as I can.

Thank you.

- We're gonna be counting
- on you.


Since Danny's fáááing

dragging ass already,

- you're gonna have
- to pick up his slack.

I mean, we all are.

- Well, I'm not gonna baby him.
- He screws everything up.

- I just have no patience
- for him anymore.

About to snap.

You know, just remember,

this is his last chance.

Sometimes I feel like

sticking up for Danny,

but I just don't want

to be involved anymore.

- Danny's kind of like
- a sinking ship.

You don't want to get too close

- because he'll just bring you
- down with him.

- We'll be able to do it.
- It'll be good.

[upbeat music]

- Benjamin. So...
- What's up, babe?

Four breakfast burritos now...


And a fruit platter.

He's been craving a croissant,

and he can have that

as a snack later.

- Plated, right?
- Yeah.


Thank you.

Okay, approaching now.

- Jen, Jen.
- Go for Jen.

- Can you go to
- the swim platform?

Bryan's got a quick

delivery for you,

- then get that
- to the galley, please.

- I'm on the starboard
- platform.

Got to catch 'em. Ready?


♪ ♪

[gasps] She got some!

They smell lovely.

- Do you want me to ask if
- they'd rather

Have croissant ones now?

- That's fine, yeah.
- Cool. Thanks, Jen.

- Thanks, love.
- You're welcome.

- Thanks, Ben.
- Yeah.

Yes, we've done it. We've got

the croissant challenge done.

- We've come through,
- and we've got you croissants.

- All: Yay!
- Awesome!

- So three breakfast
- croissants and one burrito?

- No, I want a burrito also.
- So two burritos.

- I want a burrito.
- Three burritos, one croissant.

- I definitely want
- the croissant.

Yeah, good. Okay.

- All: Thank you.
- Great job.

- You're welcome.
- Great job.

- Sounds good.
- Looking good.

Feeling good.

Jesse, he's super tough,

so one breakfast croissant

and three burritos.

- Awesome. Thanks, baby.
- Fruit platter's up there.

I'm just gonna get my coffee

and come down for 45.

All right, burrito time.

Yeah, baby.

Burrito time.


[laughs] Burrito time.

- Can one of you
- hold it, please?

Here. I got it.


- Hold up. Why is it... hold on.
- Hold on. Let me see.

- Let me see. Let me see.
- It's taking too long.

- Can you please
- flake out your line

- Like I showed you
- before, please?

Jen and Daniel

are like farts in the wind.

They're lost,

but you smell them.

All right. Done and done.

♪ ♪

Let's do this.

♪ ♪

Okay, there's food.

- Breakfast is ready?
- Yeah, yeah.

It's all ready, yeah.

- Yeah.
- Exciting.

- This is delicious.
- Mmm.

- That's what
- gets me out of bed.

- I wake up starving.
- They baked this today.

This is awesome.

- How'd those croissants
- turn out?

- Are they look... are they good?
- Are they...

- Yeah, man.
- They're fáááing awesome, dude.

Thank you so much.

- Yeah, yeah.
- You saved the day, man.

He loved it.

He was expecting them for later.

- Fantastic.
- Ben, they...

They weren't

expecting the croissants later.

- It's okay, Jules.
- It's all good.

- Yeah, I wouldn't go
- to all that effort

- If they wanted them
- for later, Ben.

You do realize that, right?

Okay, when he found out

we didn't have any croissants...

- Yeah.
- He said, "All right, fine."

"I'll have a breakfast burrito."

No, he didn't. Todd asked.

Primary wanted a croissant.

- I know, and then when
- he found out we didn't have any,

- He said, "I want a break... then
- I'll have a breakfast burrito."

No, he didn't.

No. I just don't know

- why there's such
- a big deal about it.

It was just a croissant.

- There is no big deal about it.
- Okay.

- You're the only
- one mentioning it.

Why is everyone getting

so irate about it then?

- Well, I don't understand
- why you're talking about it.

I don't actually care.

You want to be

the queen of croissant?

Like, what the fááá

do you want from me?


What is...?


Oh, God.


All getting too much.

All right. Fresh salsa.

So tell me what happened.

What was going on in her head?

I don't know.

'Cause what I was saying

was true.

I don't get it. I really don't.

People think I'm sweet

and I'm nice.

There's only s-so much

someone can take.

- I can tell I'm gonna have fun
- with you guys.

- Yeah.
- Yeah. Tag me in, baby.

You look good, you feel good.

You feel good, the vibe's good.

If the vibe's good,

then it's all good.

[upbeat music]

What's going on man?

- Breakfast burritos?
- Bring it.

- Okay.
- After Jesse sent everybody

In town to get croissants.


He's counter,

so temp... temperamental.

It's like, I'm English.

He's English.

- We should get each other
- to a point...

- Yeah.
- But I just don't

Get his ups and downs.

There is a north-south

divide in England.

I'm from the north,

which is your working class,

and then Ben is from the south

where the posher people live.

I don't know

if Ben looks down at me

for being from Leeds,

or in general

maybe Ben's a bit condescending.

He's a typical English guy

who's had a private education,

the typical guy

like I would avoid at all cost.

It's difficult... I feel like

I'm almost stuck in the middle,

but to me,

there's girl code, you know?

Thank you.

And poo stains in the toilet.

I miss that.

Instead of breakfast

at Tiffany's,

it's breakfast with Tiffany.


- Are you gonna buy my wedding
- ring from Tiffany's?

- Ah, no.
- They're too cheap from there.

Aw, babe.

I don't need anything expensive.

I'll just destroy it anyway.

I'll get something.

Yeah, how it is.

Jen, do you know

how to drive manual?

- A car? No.
- Okay.

My first car was a manual.

My first girlfriend taught me

how to drive a stick.

- Nice. What a good girl.
- Yeah, man.

You need one of those, Jen.


Teach you how to drive stick.

Manual's just extra work.

- Mark, Mark, Bryan.
- Go ahead.

- Daniel will be coming
- on the ATV excursion.

Copy that.

Hannah, Hannah, could you come

to the bridge, please?

Hello, Captain.

The guests want to do an

ATV trip,

- but they want us
- to go with them,

And I need one stewardess.

I'll send Tiff.

I am not letting my girl

do service alone

and be weak in front of guests.

I need to help her.

Thanks so much.

Thank you.

[hip-hop music]

♪ ♪

- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

Does anyone need sugar?

I'm good. Thank you.

Need a hand?

You need to go

give Julia a hug.

- She, like, cried today.
- Why? What's going on?

- Her and Ben went
- at it this morning.

- Like, I don't even know
- what it was about.

Something about croissants and...

- All right.
- I'll go check on her.

All right. Thank you, dear.

- Daniel, finish up because
- we need to go.

We're gonna drive ATVs.

Wait, what?

Yeah, and, Daniel,

your phone stays here.

Remember what we talked about

keeping things professional?

- All of us?
- Just Daniel and Jen.


- You're gonna look
- after the tender.

- I'm not exactly trying
- to reward Daniel,

- But he says he can drive
- a manual,

- And that's what
- we need right now,

So Jen stays on the boat

"to work."

Not great.

Can I help you?

It's good, Bobs.

Thanks, though.

You want some wet undies?

The boat really is completely

different when Julia's sad.

- Okay, Captain.
- Looks like "Pegasus."

That would be the boat.

All crew, the guests

are ready to go.

[rock music]

- That's it. That's our calling.
- Let's go. Let's get out of here.

Strap up.

♪ ♪

[all cheering]

- Everyone's been complaining
- about the guests,

Yet I haven't even spoken

to the guests.

- Aw, dude, I can tell I'm gonna
- have fun with you guys.


I don't feel what

the whole crew is feeling.

Tag me in, baby.

I got this covered.

You look good, you feel good.

You feel good, the vibe's good.

If the vibe's good,

then it's all good, right?

- Yeah! Yeah!
- There you go.

[all shouting]

Yeah, dude.

Danny just needs to learn

the balance

between too much conversation,

not enough conversation.

I'd flick you off if

I wouldn't get fired right now.


It's like being a stripper.

You want to be flirty,

not too flirty.

I'm gonna have fun today.

Yes, you are.

All right? Lots of fun.

But with a very short leash.


Oh! Ooh!

[dramatic music]

Oh, my God.

Do you ever cry, Jen?

- I can't really
- imagine you crying.

- If I look at you,
- I'm gonna cry.

Is it bad? Is it obvious

that I'm just gonna cry?

- Yeah, you look like
- when you're holding it in and...


- All right.
- Toss the wake over.

- Are these bumper cars?
- By the way...

[upbeat music]


♪ ♪


There's too many rocks!

No, no, no, no.

There's more rocks over here.

- This is what insurance is for.
- Oh, my God.

- I want to get out.
- I want to get out.

Three, two, boom.

It looks awesome.

Oh, here.

- Let's take a couple
- maybe right here.

Here you go.



These guys are hypocrites.

I can't have my phone out.

I'm not allowed

to take pictures for Instagram.

It really isn't fair.

[tense music]

♪ ♪

- Hey.
- Hi.

Julia, what was that

all about this morning?

You confused the hell out of me.

I don't know, Ben. I...

But what... what was going on?

- Do you want to go outside
- and have a chat?

I don't really care.

I just... I'm still baffled by it.

Oh, no, here we go again.

- I don't want another
- confrontation

Because I've not yet

had time to think.

- Why did you feel that you
- needed to come into the galley

And actually create an issue?

- I heard you talking
- to Bryan about the croissants.

- You got the story wrong
- 'cause it wasn't even

- Todd that asked
- for the croissants.

- It doesn't matter.
- But it's your... what... I don't...

- Was there an issue at all?
- Can I just talk? Yes.

- But it doesn't matter.
- I can't even speak to you.

- You're not even
- letting me speak, Ben.

- I tried to go
- into all this effort.

- You just, like, pooh-poohed
- the whole thing,

- And I was like,
- "What the fááá?"

Well, I'm really sorry.

- I didn't know
- you had anything to do

- With getting
- the croissants on board.

- Okay.
- I thought it was just Bryan.

I thought you'd lost your grip.

- This is what you do, Ben.
- Throughout the six weeks,

How you talk to me is sometimes

very condescending.

I feel like you put every...

You put yourself up here

and use your intelligence

to put people down.

- You went to private school
- and all that, and...

- It's got nothing to do
- with anything like this.

- Can I... but can
- I just say something?

In England, kind of upper-crust

people I would avoid.

Jules has me completely wrong

right now, and apparently,

she's had me wrong

for the last six weeks.

It's all fair to say that

I'm this arrogant twat, right,

but at the same time,

- do you think you might be
- a little sensitive?

- I might be and because
- I'm extra tired now.

- Normally... in
- a normal situation...

- Okay, so now you're taking
- that out on me

- And calling me arrogant and...
- No, I didn't say "arrogant"...

- Putting everyone down
- because you're over tired.

- No, but I didn't say
- "arrogant," it's just...

- Well, you just admitted
- that you were over tired,

So maybe you were overreacting.

But you're doing it now,

and you don't overreact?

Are you kidding me?

- The last six weeks that's
- all you've done is overreact.

- Is that right?
- I don't feel like that.

And once... and one time

that I do it, it's like, "Bang."

All right, well,

then hang in there.

Okay. [Mumbles]

- When someone
- makes you feel stupid,

I hate that trait in someone.

What the...[sighs].

Are you kidding me?

Yeah. I'm the bad guy, right?


This yacht's, like,

taken away my personality.

Put your info in there.

I got a beautiful girl

sitting right next to me.

How often does this happen?

[dramatic music]

Okay, thank you.

I'm the bad guy, right?

Where is she?

I don't know.

- Like, it was just really weird.
- Yeah.

- I don't even know what you guys
- were arguing about.

I don't ever want to, like,

make people upset.

I'm no better than anyone else.

I just don't feel right

about what Jules thinks I am.

My father is Patrick Robinson.

He's written

many best-selling novels.

He is completely self-made.

I used to play sports

with Prince William and Harry.

It was just ultra-privileged,

but I didn't want

to rest on my laurels

- because that's not
- how my dad was,

And that's the reason

I left England.

Yeah, I really don't think

I'm that scary.

Am I? Am I scary guy?



Aw, there's some goats.

Got to get me with flash.

Oh, God, we're gonna die.


I want the water, though.

- Come on, baby.
- All right.

- All right.
- Yeah.

This is a great little bar.

This is...

All right.

All right, guys.

All right, here we are.

First round's on me.

- What do you want?
- A Coke? Soda water?

- Yeah.
- A spritzer.

So where are you from again?

Orlando. Orlando, Florida.

How about you?


- L.A.
- I'm going to L.A.

- I'm gonna party VIP style,
- go crazy.

Have you been there before?

Never. Oh, my God. Stop.

You want to walk

down the beach?

And then we had to twerk.

That is not real life.

For real.

- Come on, look at
- the dude's hair.

That guy is player pimp.

Look at it. It's so good.

- Daniel's holding one
- of the guest's phones,

And I wish it was his phone

- so that I could have
- grabbed it from him

And hopefully got his ass

kicked off this boat.

Oh, my gosh.

Bryan, Bryan,

- we need you guys
- back on the boat for dockage.

So... okay, copy that.

We got to go get the car.

- Is it go time?
- Yep.

- [laughter]
- Whoa.

Like, "You go here?"

I was gonna go, like, a month.

- Daniel, Daniel,
- we got to go.


- So why don't you
- excuse yourself?

- I must be your valet,
- and I must get your vehicle.

Let's do it.

- Greek "Driving Miss Daisy"
- time.

Whatever souls can afford

to be lost can go with Daniel.



Okay, here we go.

Right there.

Watch the road, Daniel, son.

I'm... I'm very nice.

- I'm respectful,
- but at the same time,

- I kind of like to step
- over the line sometimes.

Yeah, of course.

You have fun.

- Yeah, you got to have some
- fun, you know?



Put your info in there.

We're in Greece.

I got a beautiful girl

sitting right next to me,

and we're vibing...

How often does this happen?

Whoo, whoo!

Hashtag YOLO.

- Thank you, guys. Thank you.
- It was a blast, man. Yeah.

- Thank you so much, buddy.
- Yeah.

- Thank you so much.
- Absolutely.

- We have to go back to the boat
- and help try to get it docked.

- You guys get back to work.
- Bye, guys.

All right, sounds good.

- See you guys in a little bit.
- Thank you.

All: Bye.

[electronic music]

♪ ♪

- Mark, Mark, Jen, Jen.
- Anybody copy?

Copy. I'm ready for "Pegasus."

- Ready!
- Ready?

- Where are the guests?
- Shoes off.

How was it?

- It was good.
- Was it?

- Yeah, I think they had
- a really fun time,

- And they were really grateful
- to, you know,

- Talking,
- chatting with us as well.

Oh, good.

- So I think it was
- an overall win.

- How did Danny do?
- When we were leaving,

I... I see him, you know,

chatting up and being crazy,

just doing Danny.

- Okay, well, thanks
- for the update.

- Thanks for letting...
- Filling me in on Danny.

You got it.

- So good to have you guys
- back on board.

Are you okay?

Yeah, I'm cool.

- It's fine.
- Everyone's just tired.

I need to get off this boat.

It's sending me crazy.

- Oh, babe.
- Oh, gosh.

- Oh, babe. I know.
- I'll make you cry more about it.

You're all right.

[loud kissing]

- Oh, you're getting more, baby.
- [squeals]

Oh, sorry.

Deck crew.

- Let's raise the anchor
- and get underway.

Okay, copy that.

Anchor's in the pocket.

Okay, here we go.

♪ ♪

Please stand by

for docking portside.

80 feet from the dock

and closing.

Let's start getting

some lines on.


Pick up, dude. Pick up.

We're looking good.

- We're looking good.
- Start tying it up.

Copy that.

We're really tight

on the stern,

- and our gangway's
- lined up perfect.

- We're looking good.
- Good job, everybody.

Good job.

All crew, all crew, guests

will be back within 30 minutes.

[hip-hop music]

♪ ♪

[all talking at once]

Go change and do dinner.

Heading down.

- Tiffany, if only everyone
- could be

As beautifully mannered as you.

People should be getting

that second wind

- and being like,
- "It's nearly over."

- "It's gonna be awesome, and..."
- You know what I mean?

Instead of, like,

unraveling completely.

I do feel for bad for Julia.

She's super stressed out,

but Ben's just being himself.

- He's being funny.
- He's not being condescending.

- It's okay, Chef. You got this.
- I believe in you.

I think he might just be

a little misunderstood.

All right. Thank you, baby.


♪ ♪

- Hi.
- Hey!

- How are you going?
- Hello.

- Good. How are you?
- Good. Did you have a good day?

- Yes.
- It was a great day.

We missed you, though.

- Aw.
- Did you miss us?

Yes, of course.

- We're ready for you guys
- for dinner when you are, okay?

- We're ready.
- Okay.

- We're ready.
- Perfect.

♪ ♪

- Oh, wow.
- Look at this table.

They knocked it out of the park.

♪ ♪

Are you good, baby?

All good, darling.

- Should I plate or no?
- Yup.

- You sure?
- Yeah.

- Okay.
- Sorry.

- I had to do water four times.
- It's fine, honey bunny.

- I get it... remember,
- I'm the biggest

Assáááá in the world.

- If there was a problem,
- I'd tell you.

[upbeat music]

So this is a... a Naxian octopus

- with a tomato chili sauce
- and ginger.


- Bon appétit. Enjoy.
- Thank you.

This looks amazing.

Well done, Hannah.

Calendar girl.

Is that from our shoot?

No, this is their...

Their own calendar.

She sent me

the Kilt... Tilted Kilt calendar.

Comes out, like... not... not even

all the information

is filled out.

- She looks really good in that.
- Yeah, right?


I would never pull out the phone

- and start bragging
- about the girl

Who almost got me fired.

- Yeah.
- Take this.

- We explained to you
- in every single fáááing way

We possibly could

why that's not okay,

and now you went and did it

behind our backs.

She is hot, right?

What's up, Cap?

- We need to be on deck
- at 7:00 doing stuff.

- Man, I really want
- to see Santorini.

It's gonna be a fun day

going to a new location.

Onward and upward.

This is so glamorous

right now.

Scrubbing poop.

Tiffany, it's not going.

It's dynamite poop.

- You got to put some elbow
- grease in there.

Elbow grease doesn't work.

You do the, like, shuffle

and close your mouth.


All right, it's ready.

- Like Freddy.
- All right.

So this a seared ahi tuna

with a Japanese slaw.

- Awesome.
- Thank you.

I have to say,

Ben is very talented.

He's good.

- I've been doing this
- for five years.

I know what I need

to do in this job.

- Babe, you ready for bed?
- Ready for bed.

Sleep well.

All: Good night.


I just want to go over

this Jules thing, right?

I... you know,

she's clearly homesick,

overworked, over stressed,

- and I feel like it's
- a little unfair for her

To just blame me

for being a posh southerner

and my attitude towards her.

I'm actually way more sensitive

than people think, you know,

and that actually affects me.

I think she's just maybe

not used to working

with your type of personality.

- I wasn't used
- to it at the start.

I adapted.

Yeah, but it doesn't mean

that I am

the worst human

that ever lived.

Nobody's saying you're

the worst human that ever lived.

There's Hitler.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

- I respect everyone
- on this boat,

And it just kind of upset me

that... that

someone would think that of me.

It's really fáááed me over,


[electronic music]

♪ ♪

- Morning, Tiff.
- How are you feeling today?

You mean emotionally?


I don't know. Just exhausted.



What's up, people?

- Good morning.
- Good morning.


Coffee, cream, burritos.

Let's see what

Chefy can do for us.

All righty.

♪ ♪

- Deck crew, let's get underway
- and go to Santorini.

- Okay, copy that.
- You guys hear that?

- It's go time.
- Okay, Bobby.

- You slack your
- number two there.

Lines are free, Cap.

Port ahead, clear.

- We're wide
- open and looking good.

Okay, thank you.

♪ ♪

Thank you. Thank you so much.

- I don't know what it is
- with me right now,

But I don't feel right

about what happened yesterday

between Jules and I,

and I just can't let it go.

- Are you okay this morning?
- Yeah.

No, I was... I was fine. I'm fine.

I think I'm just

a little worn out, but...

That thing with Julia

just kind of upset me,

to be honest.

It touched a nerve?

Yeah, it... it really hit home

because that was, like,

the reason why I left England.

You know, even though we're

privileged and well-educated,

it's, like, actually working

against me, you know,

because people put you

within that stigma of being

a silver spoon brat

or whatever,

and I'm just

everyday person

with an accent.

I don't know.

It... it seems so petty,

but it... it just dragged up a,

- you know,
- a past emotion of mine,

And just kind

of screwed me over.

[soft music]

♪ ♪


I respect everyone on this boat,

and it just... it

just kind of upset me that... that

someone would think that of me.

♪ ♪

I left home very young and did

everything myself, you know.

I do.

Just really fáááed me over,


♪ ♪

I can't believe

I'm fáááing crying.

♪ ♪


Next, on "Below Deck Med"...

We have arrived to Santorini.


I've always dreamt

of seeing Santorini,

and it is gorgeous.

All: Cheers!

- It's nice to have
- female company

And not have to be

obligated to anything.

- Oh, wow.
- It's pretty cool, right?

- Julia told me to ease up
- on the flirting,

- But it's killing me inside.
- [laughing]

I caught Daniel in the act,

phone out, talking...

- "Is that Daniel?
- Look what he's doing. Oh!"

You look like an idiot.

Shut your baboon face.

Fáááing ass, bro.

You're dead to me.

This is ridiculous.

- Shut up, Julia.
- You've been flirting with me

- All fáááing season.
- Shut up, Julia.

You'd be lucky for me

to touch you.

My boyfriend is...

Is a fáááing pussy.

For more on "Below Deck Med,"